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Beetlejuice entered Lydia's room and said, "look! I've got some cool bugs that would go great in a cake. Wanna bake?" It took a moment for Beetlejuice to look around and realize that something was wrong. "I'm all for dark and gloomy but this is a bit much even for you. Lyds, what's wrong?" The only answer was a groan. That's when Charles entered the room. "Beetlejuice! What are you doing here? Lydia is sick and cannot hang out with you today. I just finished disinfecting the whole house." "So that's what smells so funny. Let me nurse Lyds. I'll make sure she's better in no time." Beetlejuice offered. Charles sighed. Beetlejuice couldn't make things worse right? Maybe this could lead to him learning some empathy. "Alright, fine. But only because I don't want everyone else catching her illness. By the way, can ghosts catch illnesses?" The thought of having Adam and Barbara getting sick was not a pleasant one. "No. Not with any human illnesses at least. There is this one sickness that has green boils filled with black oozing pus. But humans can't get that." Charles looked disgusted. "I know exactly what will make Lydia feel better! I'll be in the kitchen." And off Beetlejuice went. *********************** "Beetlejuice what are you doing?" Delia asked. "Making a cake for Lydia. Cake always makes people feel better." Said the demon. "Bj, honey, I don't think a cake is a good idea. Lydia would probably prefer some soup. I have the ingredients for chicken soup if you want to help me." She offered. Beetlejuice decided the cake could wait until later and got to work on the soup. ************************ Lydia lay in bed sleeping but the smell of chicken and herbs woke her. "Oh, hey!" Said Beetlejuice. "Beej! What are you doing here? " She asked in surprise. "Just got here a minute ago. Did you know you mumble in your sleep?" "Uh...no. But thanks for letting me know." She replied. "Anytime babes! Always here to help. Hey, I brought you some soup Danielle made." He offered the bowl to her. "Thank you. She didn't put tofu or anything like that in it, did she?" Lydia was skeptical. "No. Just chicken and noodles and such. Boring stuff. Nothing fun like the cake I was gonna make." "Well, I think today I would prefer the soup." Lydia said. "We can make your cake next week when I'm feeling better." Lydia took a bite of soup. "This is delicious! You should get yourself a bowl." "NAH, wholesome foods make me break out in... you don't want to know. Anyways, while you are sick I'll be your nurse. Just call me Florence Nightshade." "You mean Nightingale." "No, I mean Nightshade." Lydia laughed. "Okay, have it your way. I'm just gonna take a little nap." *******************************
When Beetlejuice brought Lydia's dishes down stairs he was wearing an old fashioned nursing uniform. "Uh, Beetlejuice, why are you dressed like a World War 1 field nurse?" Asked Adam. "Because Lydia is sick and this is what nurses wear when they nurse the sick." He replied. "No, no they don't. Most nurses wear scrubs. But if you like the antique nurse look go for it." Adam explained while trying to keep a straight face. Barbara was all too shocked to say anything. The sight of Beetlejuice in a dress and cap was surprising. Where he got the uniform from and why he chose that one was a mystery. "Beetlejuice, honey, go put those dishes in the sink and wash your hands please." Said Delia. She didn't understand the reactions Adam and Barbara had to the outfit. If Beetlejuice wanted to dress as a nurse that was fine with her. ******************************* Lydia awoke from her nap, saw Beetlejuice, and laughed. "Beetlejuice! What are you wearing?" She asked. "It's a nurse's uniform. I am your nurse." He explained. "You know nurses haven't worn that outfit in almost a hundred years, right?" "Last time I checked this was the style babes. Whaddya mean it's changed?" Beetlejuice looked confused. "It's changed a lot. But I like you in this outfit. I feel a lot better now." Lydia would have hugged him but she was too achy. "Hey, can you get dad, please?" She asked. "Your wish is my command." And with a puff of smoke Beetlejuice was gone. ****************************************** "Hey Chuck. Your daughter wants ya." Beetlejuice said. "How is she?" Asked Charles. "Her spirits are great but she's still sick." "I wonder what she could want." Charles mused. He went upstairs, turned around and said, "Take off that ridiculous costume. We aren't in the trenches of France." When he got to her room he opened the door and Lydia said, "Dad, I need some Tylenol, please." "Of course sweetheart." He said. "I didn't want to ask Beetlejuice because I don't know what he would have come back with." She clarified. "Good thinking. I shudder to think what he might be preparing to do already." Replied Charles.
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As Lydia started feeling better, Beetlejuice kept on "nursing" her. "Beej, I don't need you to feed me. I have a flu, not the plague. I'll be back to myself in a few more days." Insisted Lydia. "But Lyds, you are sick." He replied. "I'm not dying. I just have a flu that will go away on its own." She explained. The last time Beetlejuice knew of anyone having the flu they died. "Let me at least change your sheets and get you a warm blanket. I don't want to take any chances." He said. "Why do my sheets need changing? They were put on right before I got sick. And I already have several warm blankets because you keep on bringing them to me. If anything I am too warm!" Lydia stated. "And while you're at it, no more trying to get me to take cod liver oil. Delia has already tried every essential oil in the book. I'm all oiled out." "But babe, if you don't take your oil you won't get better." Beetlejuice replied in a concerned tone. "Beetlejuice, this isn't the early 20th century anymore. That flu epidemic is over and done with. I promise I won't die." Explained Lydia. "Well, if you say so. But rub that camphor on your chest just to be safe." Lydia didn't look happy. "Out! I get that you are trying to help but I don't need it." Beetlejuice left feeling rather dejected.
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"I'm sure she didn't mean to upset you." Delia said. "You were trying to help but what you thought of as helping wasn't what she needed. Nobody takes camphor anymore and you don't have to make such a fuss. She isn't going to die if you're worried about that. She's going to be just fine. You two will be creating chaos again in no time." "Ya mean it?" Asked Beetlejuice. "Yes! Now go put on your favorite suit that I just washed and see if you feel better."
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Beetlejuice put on his suit and adjusted his tie. Despite not liking clean things having a freshly laundered suit was nice. It was still warm from the dryer and it smelled terrific. Delilah really outdid herself with mending the holes and removing the stains. The smell of flowers usually annoyed him but this smelled just like a funeral and Beetlejuice loved funerals. He went to see what everyone was up to.
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"Alright Beetlejuice, Lydia is resting and dinner is almost ready. Please set the table for three." Barbara said. "Why only three? Isn't Lydia joining us?" He asked, concerned. "No. She's sick and is going to stay in her room so nobody else catches the flu. She will have some more soup later." "Then what are we having?" He asked. "Spaghetti. Your favorite. Did you make sure to..." "Yes. I made sure a container of your favorite worms will be available as a dessert." While everyone else found worms distasteful, Beetlejuice loved 'em. So at least once a week he was given a container of earthworms as a treat. "Then call your table set!" He said with a flourish as he picked up the plates and went into the dining room.
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The next day Lydia was well enough to leave her room. "Wanna watch 'Don't Look In The Basement'?" Asked Beetlejuice. "Sure. But no eating worms in the living room. Dad's new rule." Apparently Charles didn't like dirt being left all over the couch. "Oh, Alright. Can I at least eat popcorn?" "Okay. But no butter on mine. I'm still recovering." Lydia said. They watched the movie and ate their popcorn. "Alright Lydia, that's enough for one afternoon. Please take a nap." Charles said. Lydia was feeling tired and decided not to argue.
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A few days later Lydia was better but Beetlejuice had the flu. "I didn't think you could catch the flu." Delia said. "I didn't think so either. Yet here we are. I need to make out my will. Ya know, just in case I don't make it." "Oh, Beetlejuice! You won't die from the flu. Actually since you are already dead I don't think anything bad can happen to you." Lydia replied. "How is it possible that I can catch the flu? Dead people don't catch...achoo!" "Apparently they do. Or at least demons can get sick. Now lay down and I'll make you some nice tea." Delia said. If anyone was glad to see Delia it was Beetlejuice. At least she wasn't shy when it came to making worm soup.
( Beetlejuice's favorite.) With a family like this he would be better in no time.