Archive of Our Own

The ruins stretching out for miles and miles across the twin cities, splattered with muddied colours and the husks of once lively bodies, had become a devastatingly familiar sight for Jayce. Almost as familiar as the feeling of trudging through his ruined home one small step at a time, dragging with him nothing but a twisted branch, an infected leg, and the rags clinging to his soaked back that could generously be considered clothing. Time held no relevance here, Jayce couldn’t tell if he had been trapped in this reality for a month, a year, or far longer.

A part of him couldn’t bear the thought of knowing— at facing just how long he had been succumbing to the insanity of his isolation. Another part of him couldn’t muster the energy to care about anything but continuing to walk forward, ignoring all emotions in his path, pursuing a goal that he could hardly make out in his mind anymore.

“I won’t fail.”

His own voice echoed in his ears on a loop. All through the fissures of Zaun, across the greying river decorated by yellow tulips, and trekking up the graveyard that once was Piltover. A bustling city now inhabited by creaking mannequins and his own wheezing breaths, the upward slope becoming unbearable and yet the will in his head refusing to allow him to stop. Somewhere at the peak, atop the core of what began his time in this distorted reality, was where some part of him knew he must go. Right back to the start.

“I won’t fail.”

Step once. Twice. Once. Twice. Again. Again. Again. He couldn’t stop his feet from moving despite feeling as though they had been dragged through fire and sliced with glass, his left leg crying out at him. His mind only cried back, the irrational sense that the moment he stopped the upward momentum would send him flying back down into the cavern again.

Images flashed through Jayce’s mind every time that his thoughts turned back to that dreaded prison. He used one hand to grip his greasy hair as the phantom taste of lizard flesh coated his tongue, and the stinging from his infected, callous-covered hands made him choke back a scream.

He took another step on his injured leg. His foot slipped and sent him to his knees. The scream escaped.

“I won’t fail.”

Kneeling at the front gates of the Academy — or rather, what he thought was where the Academy should be. Amidst the sea of golden web-like veins and overlapping colours, it left much surviving infrastructure to the imagination — Jayce felt a horrendous weight crash down on him and pin him to his knees, everything he had been holding back now trying to break down the floodgates. He gritted his teeth through the pain of it all; the desperation for warmth and food, the never-ending agony that pulsed through his leg, his heart yearning for the happier past that he shared with a dear partner.

But he knew it was all gone now, ripped away as a result of his own foolish decisions, and Jayce had no choice but to keep walking to his destination. A distant part of him mourned the broken man he had become, and the endless loop of pain he now devotedly followed.

He slowly blinked through the haze, raising his head to meet the Academy walls.

Only to find himself perched at the top of his final goal. The Hexgate.

He blinked again, unaware of how he climbed this far. Straight ahead was the overgrown, kneeling mannequin that he distantly recognized as his own figure. Across from that, eyes glued to his other self, stood a white cloaked mage— the mage, who made no motion to acknowledge Jayce’s arrival.

Somehow, without having seen the man’s face, Jayce already knew that he was staring at Viktor.

“I won’t fail.”

His breath shook as a heavy weight took the place of the branch he had gripped throughout his journey, and Jayce looked down to find it replaced with the mangled form of a hammer.

A Hextech hammer, his mind quickly supplied. Though its shape was much more akin to a butterfly’s wings than the device he was used to, its familiar weight and handles still felt like coming home. He looked up to see the mage, a Viktor much older than the one he knew, now facing him across the rooftop with a wistful expression. Jayce’s breathing stuttered again as the echoing in his mind grew louder.

“I won’t fail.”

His own voice felt foreign and commanding to his ears. His body began to move on its own, raising the corrupted hammer to point straight in Viktor’s direction. He tried screaming to stop but his lips wouldn’t even twitch. No, this isn’t how it’s supposed to go, don’t hurt him—

“I won’t fail.”

He felt his hand clench the hammer’s handle of its own volition, the crystal at the core revealing itself as the weapon began to charge up a blast. Jayce’s heartrate spiked in panic, he couldn’t do this not to Viktor please no! No!!

The mage only stared back at him, lips slightly parted as if wanting to speak, and his eyes widening in surprise at the hammer aimed toward him. Still, he made no attempt to move out of the way.

Jayce sobbed.

“I won’t fail.”

He clenched his eyes shut as he felt his body shoot the beam from the Hextech crystal straight into Viktor. Rainwater began sliding down his face despite the lack of clouds overhead. Jayce barely registered a thing. How could he possibly do this? Following a destination this far, this agonizing, and the destruction of the one who he held most dear was the solution. How could this be the answer?

The echoing hum of the blast faded out, as the hammer concealed the inner gemstone once more.

“Ja–Jayce…”

Jayce’s eyes snapped open at the sound of his former-partner’s rasping voice. The weapon collapsed out of his grip as he was met with the horrors of Viktor splayed out on the ground, white cloak and beard now gone in favour of a younger face, and a gaping hole akin to a void taking the place of where his chest should be. It was beautiful and terrifying and confusing all at the same time.

Jayce did that.

Viktor’s partner killed him.

He could do nothing but watch in silent shock, eyes burning from the tears, as Viktor convulsed in pain and murmured his last, barely-audible words.

“Why… would you do th–this.….. to me…?”

Jayce couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t breathe because neither could Viktor, and that was his fault. It was all his fault. This was never how it was supposed to go, and now there was no taking back the despair that settled in his chest — an endless pain to accompany his now-endless stay in this derelict world. There was no escape now.

“I won’t fail.”

WHY?!

He screamed, and he sobbed, and he gripped his hair in an attempt to rip it out. Nothing could ever make this better, not without Viktor. Nothing. Nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing—

And in one violent, churning motion, Jayce felt his trembling sobs and a choked back scream come flying out of his mouth as he flew awake in a warm bed. In his own bed, rather, as the sheets bunched up around his legs in his panic and he registered the sheen of sweat coating his body. Shadows crowded the edges of his vision as he gripped the fabric below his palms in a desperate attempt to ground himself.

It was all too much, he couldn’t breathe, his mind couldn’t comprehend what reality was true through the overlapping images of horrific wastelands and now a cozy cottage.

Had he been sleeping? Suffering a flashback? He didn’t know how long it had been. His lungs raced. Did he ever even escape that hell? He couldn’t remember how or if he had actually killed—

Something tightened.

The sudden awareness of another figure beside him made Jayce’s body stiffen with alarm, and his head snapped to the right to find… Viktor — his Viktor — fast asleep in the bed with him, tucked up against his torso and one arm gently hugging him close at the waist.^[1]

Jayce’s breaths stuttered, his partner’s touch being both an aching comfort and an overwhelming sensation. He forced himself to slip out of Viktor’s grip as quietly as he could despite craving the warmth, Jayce felt far too dangerous to be near him with the memory of what he did fresh in his mind. He couldn't risk it.

“Why… would you do this.….. to me…?”

He tugged at his hair and sobbed. Everything was just too much. Grabbing the nearest blanket outside of their bedroom as a feeble alternative for warmth, Jayce stumbled outdoors to a bench that sat on the front porch of the small cottage that they now called home.^[2] He ignored where his cane leaned by the doorway in favour of limping as quickly as he could to the outside air.

“Just breathe dammit,” he muttered to himself, clutching the blanket tighter as he tried to calm the panic that had rooted itself in his every muscle. He had faced flashbacks and nightmares that attacked his psyche before, mostly in the immediate aftermath of his time in the ruined Piltover, but still hadn’t solved the equation on grounding himself yet. Every breath demanded three more and his limbs trembled hard enough for his bad leg to start throbbing.

Jayce folded in on himself, grabbing onto his unkempt hair again as if willing his body and mind to cooperate. As nauseating visions flashed through his head and even the quiet atmosphere of the night wasn’t able to ease his shivering form, he also felt his increasing yearning for Viktor’s presence. Despite only a few minutes (seconds? hours?) having passed since leaving their bed, his partner’s absence only grew stronger and stronger.

The two had spent so little time apart in recent weeks that they’d grown much more dependent on each other for support. They were still learning how to share their own traumas and how best to help each other through them, but somehow after everything Jayce and Viktor went through they still felt a greater desire to be partners than ever before. Like being together really was their destiny, and they were happy to embrace that.

So as Jayce struggled to settle his own dread, he still left an open spot on the bench beside him and enough room in the familiar, dark blue blanket that he happened to have brought with him for another body to fit into.

He knew Viktor wouldn’t be far behind despite his tendency to sleep through anything, and wheezed a sigh of relief a few minutes later when the telltale sound of a hurried crutch hitting the floor approached him from inside of their home.^[3] The door flew open and, even in the dim light and his own blurred vision filled with unshed tears, Jayce saw the wide eyes and clenched teeth of an anxious man. Viktor looked on the verge of screaming Jayce’s name into the silence of the night.

“He was looking for you. You made him worry,” his thoughts provided. A spark of guilt hit him as he lowered his gaze back down to his lap.

Viktor turned at the sound of his partner’s shallow breaths and took his own sigh of relief, before reading the signs of distress radiating from him and slowly approaching the bench.

“Jayce?” he prompted gently.

“Hi Vik. S-Sorry I left I just, uh… was feeling a bit sick and needed some fr–fresh air,” Jayce stammered without raising his head. He didn’t know why he felt the need to avoid the truth, he knew Viktor would see right through him anyway. His walls must’ve subconsciously come back up again from the state he was in.

Sure enough, the other man hummed in a tone that Jayce easily recognized as “do you really think I’m buying that?” and said nothing as he shuffled over to the opposite end of their bench. Viktor silently placed down his crutch and filled in the empty space that Jayce had left for him under the blanket. The only sound between them was the rapid pace of Jayce’s breaths that refused to cease.

“Please,” he was now pleading internally, as if Viktor still held insight into his mind and could possibly hear him. “I’m sorry for hurting you, I’m sorry for everything. Please don’t leave me.”

Though it was clear who had always been the touchier one of the two of them, moments like this created an abnormal energy between them and their usual, expected dynamic. Jayce, the one always reaching out to wrap his arms around Viktor, rest his head on his shoulder or hold his hand, was now fully closed in on himself and avoiding the physical contact as he shook anxiously. It was deeply unsettling to see the overwhelmed reactions Jayce had to every sensation around him, per Viktor’s conclusion.

Viktor, on the other hand, always warmed at the touches that Jayce offered and accepted them greedily without offering as much back himself, typically opting for other methods of expressing his affections aside from physical ones. Yet, when faced with scenes like this, Viktor held much less hesitation in giving back the same support and comfort that his partner always showered him with. For Jayce, and only Jayce, he could become equally as physical in return.

And right now, watching him in a state like this? He would blanket his entire body around Jayce’s and hold him tightly against him forever, shielding him from every horror the world might throw his way, if it meant he would never have to see him in this much distress ever again.

Gently so as to not alarm him further, Viktor slid closer to Jayce until their knees barely bumped together.^[4] He started small as to gauge his reaction, and when the only response from Jayce was to press his leg fully against Viktor’s after a moment of hesitation, he read this as his partner’s unspoken plea for help. A silent affirmation that he understood as “I’m okay with you touching me”.

Leaning closer to him, Viktor held up his left hand palm side-up as an offering. The acceleration rune-shaped scar glowed a gentle blue against his palm — matching the identical scar on Jayce’s left wrist — and slowly Jayce took the offered hand and interlocked their fingers. Viktor could feel his shaking, and gently stroked his thumb against Jayce’s skin to help ground him.

“Was it the other reality again?” Viktor finally asked, his voice just above a whisper. Jayce barely nodded in reply.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Jayce swallowed and tightened his grip on their interlocked hands, visibly in thought. Then, he shook his head with a sad half-smile.

“Nothing you— you haven’t seen already, really,” he answered. “Just the usual pain and death everywhere. Felt like I w-was really back there this time.”

Viktor hummed sadly. He understood the aftermath of facing a dreadful nightmare or flashback, having dealt with many of his own, and could tell that Jayce wasn’t interested in describing his memories in great detail. With the peaceful future laid out before them, Viktor similarly couldn’t bear to think too much about their past horrors.

Images flashed through his mind of a dear friend screaming his name as she turned to dust. A metal hand that remained entirely under his control as its deadly grip tightened around his partner’s throat. Thousands of minds begging for mercy from the machine deity attempting to claim their souls.

He quickly warded the reminders away. Jayce needed his help now, nothing else mattered.

Viktor focused primarily on comfort, remaining silent as the two of them drank in the clean air and pressed warmly together beneath the shared blanket. He admired the mysterious night sky, very colourful and otherworldly from what they were familiar with, and held Jayce’s hand tight as his breathing finally began to slow down again. The panic was evidently ceasing, but their point of contact remained snug.

“Tell me if I should stop,” Viktor said after a few minutes of silence, giving his hand another rub in silent questioning.

Jayce finally turned his head to his partner next to him with a wide, watery gaze, shuddering for a moment longer — whether due to panic, the cold, or both, Viktor was unsure — before answering his question by leaning into Viktor’s space and pressing his forehead against his shoulder.

“Please don’t…” Jayce murmured.

Viktor immediately softened at the increased contact, shifting so that his partner could more easily lay against him.^[5] He felt his eyes burn at the vulnerability, despite this being far from his first time seeing it, and their breathing slowly began to sync more as Jayce calmed down. Viktor carefully released their interlocked hands in favour of wrapping his arm around his partner’s shoulders, and giving a comforting squeeze while Jayce nuzzled his face against the crook of Viktor’s neck.

Even he had to admit the closeness felt very nice. He bundled the familiar blanket around the two of them so they more closely resembled a cocoon, and considered if he should push himself to be this… snuggly more often. Funny, Viktor pondered, how not very long ago he would have deemed activities such as physical affections or a full-nights sleep to be an utter waste of time in the face of the changes they were preparing to bring to the world. They had no time for such pointless indulgences.

Now? Moments like these, warm in Jayce’s arms or Jayce in his, were the moments they lived for. Viktor would rather leave the world to their own devices and stay right here forever, selfish as he had become.

Yet he was startled from his peace a moment later, as a sudden gust of wind blew past the open fields beyond their home and alarmed a number of animals, triggering distant movement and noises. Jayce’s breath hitched again at this, and his frame tightened as he abruptly moved his body to face fully toward Viktor, wrapping both large arms around his aching frame. Viktor wheezed at the tight embrace, before returning the gesture and bringing his other arm up to meet the one still over Jayce’s shoulders, holding him close as Jayce pressed his face into Viktor’s shoulder.

“Nonononono I can’t do this, not again. Please…”

“Jayce—”

“Please don’t go V.”

He felt a shiver build in Jayce’s shoulders as a soft sob escaped him.

“I am surely not going anywhere while you are like this. Are you sure you’re alright Jayce?” Viktor asked, concerningly rubbing his back. Jayce paused, taking a few longer breaths before attempting to speak again.

“...Yeah, eventually. I just can’t— don’t want to be reminded of that cold, empty fissure anymore. Not while you’re right here.”

Viktor frowned sympathetically at that, and Jayce pressed his nose tighter into the crook of his neck in a more desperate cling than Viktor had ever seen out of him. As if he were a starving man for human touch. His breathing was closer to normal now, but the involuntary tremble remained — a reaction less easily grounded.

“It must have been worse than I realized…” Viktor thought, continuing to move his hand in comforting circles against Jayce’s back, as if trying to wipe away the horrific images from his mind’s eye. Jayce’s grip held strong while he released some of the remaining tension in his body with a long exhale. A wet spot silently appeared on Viktor’s pajama shirt, and he continued quietly reassuring his partner that he wasn’t there anymore, that he and everyone else were all safe. He pressed a chaste kiss to Jayce’s temple, hugging him even closer.

Viktor knew he would hold his other half for as long as he needed, just as Jayce would do for him.

They were together, they were breathing, and they were free.

Many minutes passed before the tears and ongoing flashes of memories would ease for good, but Jayce breathed a sigh of relief as he felt a calm wash over him to smother the remaining anxieties like a blanket. Viktor never left the comfortable position they now found themselves in, one hand still supporting his back while the other had moved to gently stroke his hair— a habit he had picked up on after learning of Jayce’s appreciation for it.

He felt an overwhelming surge of gratitude for Viktor clutch at his chest, tightening his hug in response. He tried ignoring the small voice of guilt telling him that he didn’t deserve this, that he had done too many horrible acts of war to deserve such tenderness and care. They were both still learning how to forgive themselves as they had for each other.

“Thank you, V. Just to have— having touch reminds me that I’m not alone anymore… it helps so much,” Jayce said with sincerity. He buried his face closer against Viktor’s shoulder. “You help so much.”

“It’s the least I can do for you Jayce,” Viktor replied softly, and leaned back slightly so he could cup a hand to Jayce’s face. He swiped away a lingering tear, and being so close together now helped Jayce realize that his partner’s eyes were damp with emotion too. “And… I am terribly sorry, I should have spared you from witnessing that dreadful wasteland in the first place. I never wished for you to experience a pain that great, and yet the anomaly sent you there due to my own actions. The existence of that– that hellscape is entirely my fault.”

Jayce placed his hand over the one on his cheek and held it without breaking eye contact, before leaning in to touch their foreheads together, silencing Viktor’s descent into guilt and self-blame. He himself had done enough of that for the both of them for one night.

“Don’t, Viktor. It wasn’t your fault, you know that I don’t blame you for anything that happened. We’ve both made a lot of foolish decisions, including meddling too much with the arcane, so… just know you’re never alone. And we can learn how to live now, together. Right?”

Viktor closed his eyes and leaned his head further against Jayce’s with a relaxed sigh.

“Yes, I suppose I do know that,” Viktor conceded.

“Not to mention the fate of our own world kinda depended on me meeting the Mage-version of you, so,” Jayce said with a rather humourless chuckle, “I guess stopping me from getting there wouldn’t have been… the best idea.”

Viktor recognized his attempt to lighten the mood, and gave a faint smile.

“At least I know now to never grow a beard like that. Please stop me if I ever attempt to.”

Jayce’s gentle laughter filled the air around them, and Viktor smiled for real in success. He pressed another affectionate kiss to Jayce’s forehead, and shifted them both into a more comfortable position as their emotional tides were finally settling.

Now draped across their bench, Jayce and Viktor were so intertwined that neither could tell where one began and the other ended, and neither cared much to change that fact. Viktor leaned back so that Jayce could rest half of his larger body against his like a weighted blanket, and with his head now moved to rest against Viktor’s heartbeat. He breathed peacefully now as he wrapped both arms around his partner, who gently brushed fingers through his hair with one hand and rubbed his back with the other.

They were each other’s shield, for anything from the chill of the night to the terror of nightmares.

“How are you feeling now?” Viktor murmured, knowing he would be heard even through the lack of volume. “Any more bad memories still lingering in that big head of yours?”

“Har har,” Jayce drawled out with a smile.

With the panic gone he was feeling much better than before, though very drained. His eyes and lungs still felt swollen from all of the emotions, but the touch of his partner was enough to help those feel better anyway. The scenery around him helped him forget about the ruins of the other world, at least for a little while, and he could breathe. He felt okay.

There was one image, however, that still flashed through Jayce’s mind. Every time he looked at Viktor in front of him, there was a horror he couldn’t stop seeing.

“Just one, I think,” Jayce whispered in response to the question, “I still… keep seeing you. I can’t get the sight out of my mind of— of you with a hole blasted through your chest. Dying.”

“Oh…” Viktor breathed.

The “And I don’t understand how you could forgive me for something so truly awful,” goes unsaid. Jayce wonders if Viktor hears it anyway.

“I’m so sorry.” Jayce pressed his forehead against Viktor’s chest as if to emphasize his words.

“It’s alright, that’s in the past. I forgive you.”

Viktor somehow held Jayce even tighter against him. Through their closeness, he could tell that Viktor had something more he wanted to say, and he anticipated some resentment. Jayce held his breath.

“Should we… do our apologies again?” Viktor asked gently. He ran his hand through Jayce’s hair again as he let out his held breath.

This was a routine that they had developed together over the course of their time in the new realm, acknowledging their biggest regrets together when they felt that they needed to. Jayce found that it would often help them to process the horrors they went through and the things that they’d done, and the vulnerability brought them closer together. It usually ended in either gentle smiles and words of forgiveness, or messy tears.^[6]

“Yeah, I think that would help,” Jayce replied. Neither of them said anything at first, needing a few moments to breathe. They knew they didn’t have to rush anymore.

He felt Viktor’s chest raise with a deep breath before he started.

“Well… I’m sorry for abusing the powers of the Hexcore for extreme ambitions. Sorry for experimenting with it to begin with.”

Jayce hummed in agreement. He thought back to his own misuse of the Hexcore, how he upset Viktor by reviving him with it after he swore to destroy it. Still, he knew that he wouldn’t change his actions.

“I’m sorry for doing the same thing… but I can’t be sorry for keeping you alive,” Jayce admitted.

Viktor huffed a light chuckle.

“I know.” Viktor shifted to stretch out his bad leg, Jayce watched silently. Peacefully. “I’m sorry for transforming the bodies of countless souls, and erasing everything that made them who they were.”

“I’m sorry for causing the sparks that led to chaos and war,” Jayce added mournfully. “I’m sorry for the children who died because of me.”

A moment passed as Viktor thought. He gently squeezed Jayce’s shoulder, and he propped his head up against Viktor’s chest so that their eyes met. Viktor then shifted one hand from Jayce’s hair to gently stroke over his forehead with his thumb.

“I’m… sorry that my fingerprints are branded onto your head.”

“Don’t be, I actually really like them,” Jayce said more lightheartedly. He grabbed Viktor’s hand from his head and gave his knuckles a gentle kiss, holding the hand close to his cheek. Viktor smiled.

“I’m sorry I got caught up in the council, and with Mel, when I should’ve given more of my attention to helping you. I should’ve tried harder,” Jayce insisted, and Viktor knew not to try and argue on that right now.

“I’m sorry for trying to erase my emotions and inadequacies, for trying to make everyone perfect,” Viktor spoke quietly.

Jayce laid his head back down again to Viktor’s collarbone, tightening their hug and relishing in the warmth.

“I’m sorry for letting you walk out of the lab that day,” Jayce whispered.

“I’m sorry for abandoning you.”

“I’m sorry I killed you.”

“You had to.”

They each took a breath, working to keep their emotions under control. Jayce knew he didn’t have any more energy for crying on this night.

“I’m sorry I tried to kill you, and turn you into one of those… robots,” Viktor continued, saying the last word with a horrified whisper.

“I forgive you.”

Those few words seemed to drive away any remaining tension between them, any lingering negativity from Jayce’s nightmare or emotional turbulence in Viktor’s mind, aching legs and lungs, it all dissolved away at the mutual forgiveness of two men who didn’t exist anymore. Because they cherished it, and that’s all that mattered now.

“I forgive you, Viktor,” Jayce repeated with a smile. Viktor hugged him closer, basking in the coziness of their care.

“I forgive you too, Jayce.”

They lapsed back into peaceful silence again. Jayce nuzzled his head further into the crook of Viktor’s neck, both of them recognizing that they would not be moving from their current position for the rest of the night. The partners simply enjoyed the comfort of physical touch after the amount of years they were both deprived of it.

As he felt himself drifting back into (a hopefully dreamless) sleep, Jayce whispered one more time.

“Thank you V…”

Viktor hummed and leaned his head down over Jayce’s.

“Of course. We’re partners, aren’t we?”

“Yes. Always. No matter what,” Jayce said with no hesitation.

He lifted his head to give Viktor a quick kiss to the cheek, before they both settled down to let sleep take them.

“Love you, Vik.”

“I love you too Jayce.”

They fell asleep under the blanket of both their blue fabric and the dark skies overhead, well aware that they’d wake up in the morning aching and chilled from sleeping outside on a couch. But, being together like this at last, they couldn’t bring themselves to care.

1. Viktor was easily the stronger sleeper of the two of them, despite not sleeping for long periods at a time. While he often struggled to fall asleep but would sleep deeply when he did, Jayce would fall asleep in minutes but slept far more lightly, due to his time both in the academy lab and in the cave from the alternate timeline. [↺ return to text]

2. After coming face-to-face with the arcane, Jayce and Viktor had found themselves in a strange yet curious world that they had determined to be a between-space intertwining many timelines. Though countless unique souls and creatures that had too united with the arcane walked among them, the two men remained solely focused on each other. After deciding it would be safest to hold back on their scientific ambitions from now on, they settled down in a comfortable house not far from a peaceful village, a space just big enough for the two of them to share until a new adventure called them. Together. [↺ return to text]

3. The one thing Viktor remained hyperaware of in his slumber was the presence of his partner. It never took him long to wake up to the lack of warmth at his side. [↺ return to text]

4. As Viktor was touching his good leg to Jayce's bad leg, he knew to be soft in his actions. At least there was one painful experience that they could share and understand on equal ground. [↺ return to text]

5. Even in their years together as lab partners, Jayce would always take a moment to check that it was okay to initiate physical touches, that Viktor's pain or irritation levels weren't flared up that day. Now, they had grown familiar enough around each other that Jayce never had to ask anymore, which made Viktor very warm when he first realized. No words were needed for them to read each other, as if they arcane had intertwined their souls more than they truly realized. [↺ return to text]

6. The first time they did this it was due to an argument about their respective self-worth, both men arguing about how they committed worse crimes and deserved less forgiveness than their partner did. It quickly turned into sobbing and apologies, and it took a while before they decided to acknowledge those bad memories again. It took even longer for it to take the form of something healthier. [↺ return to text]