Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Kerry placed the money on the counter, a couple dozen bag of groceries in the cart to her right.

"That seems like a little much for one person, doesn't it?" the cashier asks.

She shrugged. "Not one. I live with a family of five."

"So you're a trade student or somethin'? Or is that foreign exchange...?"

"You could say that," she shrugged again.

The man finished putting the money away and she left. She glanced around to make sure no one was watching before slipping into the nearby alley. Where he was waiting.

"What took so long this time?" he demanded.

"Cashier made small talk about how much I was buying," she replied, starting to hand things to him. "Nothing too worrying."

"Good," he sighed, pulling the manhole cover away from the hole. "I don't want anything to happen to my only daughter."

She playfully rolled her eyes. They picked up all the bags, slowly going down the ladder. Kerry adjusted her grip and put the manhole cover back.

"Won't they wonder where their cart went?" he wondered.

"Someone'll find it when they take the trash out," he looked skeptical. "They always do." she added.

"Let's just get these to the boys," he said.

"Let's," she agreed.

They continue through the sewers. She had to hitch her shoulder every few steps to keep her bags from falling. She half-expected the boys to ambush her when she took even one step into the lair, but when they didn't was it slightly concerning.

Only when they went to put the groceries away did it become clear why.

"What are those boys watching in there?" Splinter grumbled to himself.

"Don't ask questions you don't want answers to, pops," she warns. "I'll handle it if it is what I think it is, you just focus on putting these away alright?"

"You've always been great with them," he sighs.

"I know," she blows him a kiss as she leaves to the room a little further the hall.

The word 'freaks', screamed and loud, but thankfully not too much that Dad could hear. She leaned against the doorway and cleared her throat. They all jumped.

"Kerry!" Mikey ran for her with tears streaming down his face. "We're not monsters...right?"

She carried him over to the couch and sat down. The TV still blared the news report. She searched for the remote to turn it off before their Dad saw.

"Here," Leo held it up.

She smiled warmly and firmly shut it off. The fours gazes were all on her now.

"Let's think, are you four as wild as that guy was?"

They share uncertain glances.

"Sometimes Dad says we are..." Donnie answers honestly.

"But that wild?" she prompts.

"No," Raph whispered.

"Exactly. And you've never been seen by any police or government, isn't that right? Never been topside?"

They all grow nervous smiles at the last part, but nod anyway.

She takes a deep breath. "A story for another time, apparently. How about we just watch some Lou Jitsu for now, hm?"

The four brighten. Mikey curls himself comfortably into her arm and the twins do the same on the other side. Kerry turns the TV back on, finds the movie and settles to watch it.

It wasn't long before her eyes begin drooping, lulled to sleep by the sound of their father's voice, little do the four know. She wraps the boys in her arms tighter and lets the sleep take over.

It barely feels like three hours later when she wakes up to a hand cupping her cheek. She blinked her eyes open and yawned.

"Hey pops," she stretches.

"Were the boys okay?" he fretted.

"They were..." she trailed off, glancing down at their sleeping forms. Raph had somehow joined his brothers on her lap. "...fine. There's no more reason to talk to them about this. I know you heard it."

He smiled and grunted, getting off the couch. "I can take Orange to bed."

"I got this," she hauled Mikey and Leo over her shoulder.

Safely, so as they don't fall, and slowly rose from the chair with Raph and Donnie tucked in her arms. The boys might be getting bigger, but they would never be too much for her to hold. Well, except for maybe Raph. Dad nodded in pride and worry, watching her leave like that.

She brought Raph to his room first, then Donnie. When she put the softshell down, he clung to her shirt with surprisingly tough hands.

"I have to put your other brothers to sleep, baby," she whispered.

He let go, staring up at her with wide eyes. He formed his fingers and signed 'Will you come back after you're done?'. She was glad she paid attention to those lessons. Kerry smiled warmly, adjusting her grip.

"Of course I will,"

She left him, making quick work of getting Mikey and Leo to bed. Then she hurried back to Donnie's room.

"What's up?" she kneeled beside his bed. "Is what happened earlier still a little scary?"

He shook his head. She tilted hers.

"Then what is it?"

He reached down, grabbed her hand and guided it to his back. She sucked in a sharp breath.

"Oh. Oh, baby, no," she pulled him closer, off the bed and into her lap. "There's nothing wrong with any part of you. You're just as special as any one of your brothers."

"But I'm weaker," he curled in tighter. "I almost always get hurt when I play with them."

She put him back up on the bed facing her. She had an idea. "I'll tell you what. Tomorrow, you and me are going to go in that lab of yours. And you know what we're going to do?"

"What?" he asked.

She wiped under his eye despite there not being any tears. "We are going to make sure you can't get hurt when you play."

"How? I don't have much..." he trailed off with a new sparkle in his eye.

"Right? We're going to make you a new shell. One that will keep you from hurting your current ever again," she smiled.

He launched himself forward and wrapped his arms around her neck. She did it back. They pulled apart at the same time.

"Now what do you say we both get some rest? Refresh ourselves before tomorrow?" she asked.

'Could I sleep with you?' he signed.

She chuckled. "Of course you can."

She gathered him up in her arms and carried him to the small room they had carved out for her. It wasn't the best, but there was a bed and room for clothes so it makes do. Plus, Mikey had pinned countless pictures on the wall of her and their family.

She put Donnie down on the bed, smiled around at everything in her room and curled in with him. Nothing would ever in a million years feel as good as this.

"Fetch me that screwdriver, will you?" she pointed without looking away from the metal under her.

Donnie set the tool in her hand. She wrapped her hand around it and brought it closer to tighten the final screw.

"Alright," she took a deep breath and stepped away. "It's finished."

He brightened and grabbed it. She watched him put it on.

"How's it feel? Not too heavy, right?" she circled him slowly.

"It's perfect!" he exclaimed.

She spun him around one last time to be sure. "That's amazing! Why don't you try out those hover rotors you wanted?"

He blinked. The blades popped out of the back of the shell and lifted him into the air. He was only in the air for a few seconds before they both spark. She widened her eyes in panic as the rotors fly him put of the lab.

"No! Dammit, those need more work. Donnie!" she shouted, sprinting out after him.

The rotors sparked some more, suspending the softshell high above the ground.

"Kerry!" he cried.

She glanced around quickly. Surely there was something that could help! Her eyes landed on it — the prototype she had been working on for occasions such as these. She snatched it up.

"Don't fail me now," she whispered, hurling to the space right under Donnie was.

It blew up the second it hit the ground.

"Oh, thank goodness," she breathed. "You're gonna have to hit the release!"

Donnie looked extremely nervous and terrified. He wouldn't hit the release if it killed him. She remembered she had a remote, just in case this happened. Kerry grabbed it and hit the red button in the top left corner. She hurried to make sure he had landed on the blow-up bed-like object. He did, albeit very close to falling off.

"Donnie, are you okay?" she scrambled over.

He looked worse for wear, but fine. He took in quick breaths, then leapt to his feet.

"That was amazing! Can I do it again? Pleaseeee?" he blinked innocently.

"I don't believe Dad will let me do it with you again for a long while. Plus, with that short circuit, I clearly need to do some more work on them," she hit the release and pulled it close. "In the meantime, I hid a little secret in the lab somewhere. See if you can find it."

He hurried away with excited eyes. Sure, his birthday was in two days, but what's a gift early going to do? She got to her feet and followed after him, shell still in hand. She was stopped by a quiet voice behind her.

"Can you give this to Dee-Dee?" Mikey held up the drawing.

Kerry took it and nodded. "Of course. He'll love it."

Mikey smiled and waddled off, tiny tail wagging happily. She turned back and went into the lab. Donnie was sitting by the desk with the gift, a robot, back facing her. She set the shell and drawing down on the desk and crouched behind him.

"You like it?" she asked. "Found a few spare parts at that scrapyard..."

He spun around before she could even blink, wrapping his arms around her neck. He pulled away immediately, not giving her a chance to hug back. She smiled softly.

'I named him Shelldon' she signed. 'But you could call him whatever you want to'.

'Thank you' his hands shook slightly.

"No probbles," she whispered with a smile.

He hugged her again, tighter this time. She pulled him onto her lap and kept one eye open to watch his tail swish back and forth. The drawing was long forgotten as they turned the robot on and played with it.

Chapter Text

"Casey, listen to me. When I get to the other side, you close that door,"

The second the words left the comm on her wrist, Kerry wanted to scream. She raced to the garage and drove herself to the surface faster than she had ever in her entire life.

"What?" Casey sounded as heartbroken as she was. "Sensei, no!"

("Kerry?" Leo poked his head into her room. "You in here?"

"I am, come in," she replied.

He obeyed. She turned in her desk chair and eyed him.

"What is it?" she prompted.

He sighed. "It's Donnie. I'm worried about him."

She tilted her head. "Why's that?"

"He's been ignoring everyone," Leo replied solemnly. "Could you check on him for me?")

"Casey, it's the only way. He's too strong. He's not gonna stay on the other side unless I keep him there," Leo said.

Kerry wanted to tell him that it wasn't so bad. She wanted him to come back down so she could give him the sternest talking-to of his life about self-sacrificing. She wanted him home most of all though. None of that was going to happen.

(Leo came crying into Kerry's room. She frantically met him halfway.

"What happened?" she demanded.

"D-Donnie sa-aid-" he broke off with a choked sob. "He said he doesn't want to be twins anymore!"

The softshell in question appeared at her door. She extended an arm and pulled him close too.

"Think about how many times you've both said that in an argument," she whispered. "Have either of you meant it even once?"

They considered for a second. Then shook their heads. She smiled at both in turn.

"Exactly. Now isn't any different,")

"There has to be another way!" Casey shouted, growing more heartbroken by the second.

She couldn't blame him. She was halfway to breaking down herself. Kerry looked up at the large thing in the sky. There. That's where Leo was. Her half-brother. The one she practically raised. About to do something he would regret even while he was doing it. There was nothing she could do about it done here, but somehow that made her less worried. She resolved to consult herself about that later when Leo was back home.

"We tried everything, Case. This is the only way," The slider informed the boy almost sullenly.

Leo, please don't do this!" Raph begged "Leo!"

"You're one to talk, big bro. Hero moves are totally your style,"

No...

She could practically hear the smile in his voice. She hated it. She skidded the shell-hog to a stop, spinning it around and speeding as fast as it could go, all the while tracking where Raph's comm was. She glanced down at the map that came up and pressed even further down on the pedal.

The comm lit up with ignored conversion. Her only focus right now was getting to the three other boys and making sure they were okay. Well, until Casey talking again broke through her one-sightedness.

"Leo, please!" the boy cried. "I can't lose you again."

No!

Kerry took a deep breath. The docks got closer.

"Hey, future me would be real proud of you," Leo reassured. "I'm proud of you."

Closer...

More ignored speech.

Closer...

Closer...!

"Casey, close the portal now!" Leo commanded.

NO!

Her emotional floodgate crumbled. She forced the anger and heartbreak into her next decision. She launched the bike right over the river, hitting the button on the handles. The tires blew up instantly. It hit the water with a huge splash and continued driving like the water was still concrete. Staten Island came into view soon enough.

That's when it happened.