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Steel. Unflinching, unyielding, steel.
That is what stares back at Labrys through the twisted reflection of the bathroom mirror as her clothes hang off her in all the wrong places. In it, she can only see the jagged ends of her metallic shoulder blade equivalents jutting from her body and pressing against the fabric of her suit; can only have eyes for the unnatural nature of the back half of her skull, a crude prototype to what they would perfect in her sister; can only stand witness as her unmistakably inhuman fingers clench tighter onto the ceramic of the sink. Each of these things stands as a fragmented yet coordinated strike against what some part of her knows to be normal. Knows should be expected of a girl like her.
A… girl. Like her.
…But, when that dysmorphic tension finally ebbs, Labrys is left staring back at her crimson eyes alone in the bathroom of a Kirijo lab. Her tailored suit sits finely upon her frame as always, custom made to hide the worst edges of the mechanical body beneath. Beneath it, the synthetic cloth that covers the majority of her torso wraps up past the collar to the base of her chin. Her fingers dance up to her throat, pressing against the softest part of herself. Rigid metal hides just beneath, cold to the touch; the soft surface coating only a gel capsule to help down the bitter pill that is her nature.
The impulse to swallow dances around her throat, the memories of memories of muscles contracting and tugging at nonexistent liquids. Her voice box, ever the team player, still emits the noise as if it was truly something that was happening, and not just a faint echo of a dying girl’s nervous tic.
Labrys chuckles to herself, her airless voice sounding off even to her own ears. Like (but so very unlike) her last living sister, who began to struggle with her humanity after living her life as a robot, Labrys has had difficulty truly coming to terms with her own inhumanity. Being human came so naturally to Labrys, her own psyche so heavily tied up in that wide eyed girl whose face she can no longer conjure, that when she finally began to come to terms with everything she is, and everything she isn’t…
She found herself wanting.
A soft knock at the bathroom door. Usually it would be quite the curiosity for someone to be knocking at the one she’s in in particular, given that it’s long after closing time for this lab and all the employees have gone home.
But then, she already knows who it is.
“Come on in, sis. I’m decent.”
“I am aware.” Aigis, Labrys’ little sis by all but blood, pulls open the single occupancy bathroom door and steps inside, letting it click behind her. “You entered this room fully clothed. It would be rather odd if you left it in any other manner.”
“...God I love ya’, sis.” Labrys’ cannot help the smile that warms her face, her cyan-gray hair bouncing as her whole body trembles from a barely suppressed giggle. “For such a plain talker, you might just be the funniest girl I’ve ever had the chance to meet.”
“It was not a joke.” Aigis lies, her cheeky little smile betraying such. “But I am glad it has helped ‘clear the air,’ as they say.”
“...Ah.” Labrys’ smile darts away as her eyes drift back to the bathroom mirror. “So that’s what this is all about, then.”
“I am sorry.” Aigis approaches Labrys, reaching out and resting her hand on her shoulder. “I know you do not like it when I read you.”
“‘S fine.” Labrys shakes her head, uselessly trying to tug her hair into shape. “Not like you can help it anyway, so don’t worry ‘bout it.”
The two women haven’t known each other for long… But, on some deeper, more primal level, it feels like Labrys has known this girl her whole life. And she knows Aigis feels the same; in the way their eyes meet at the same time even across a room, or the casual manner with which Aigis initiates physical contact.
It just kinda sucks that her ability to read the Sea trumps that connection a thousand times over.
Papillon hearts are like the overcharged cousin of Labrys’ own oversized plume. Instead of a simple imbuing of a bit of Nyx’s essence, tugged and ripped at the emotional seams by uncaring and unthinking scientists, her sis’ heart was a miracle. A crisscrossing weave of plumes, a left and a right brain, a yin and a yang. With it, the Group birthed a whole damn person from a mixture of science, human ingenuity, and what may as well be magic. Magic that lets this girl peek beyond the veil, see into the hearts of man and beast…
And in Labrys’ case, read her like a damn storybook. Pictures and all.
The massive plume of dusk within Labrys, the one currently rippling with heat in her chest in reaction to the heart's presence, only got its jumpstart through piggybacking off the ego of a human being. An unknowing girl with a life ending disease, left only hoping her life would find its meaning after her death… And only after.
Mama.
…For as far as she can stretch that term, at least.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Aigis posits, her hand slowly tightening its grip on Labrys’ shoulder now that it was clear Labrys’ would not protest to its presence. “I think it would help.”
“I dunno.” Labrys reaches up, lightly patting Aigis’ hand. Her sister is such a worrywart. “Take it from your big sis; talk’s just talk.”
“You know…” Aigis pauses, another little smile playing on those lips of hers. “At least from the perspective of time spent active, I would most certainly be the eldest.”
“Yeah, yeah, okay, granny.” Labrys rolls her eyes, a smile swimming to the surface… before disappearing in the depths of the mirror, her eyes drinking in the pair of them standing in front of it.
Where Labrys is so clearly mechanical that one could tell in an instant if they merely took the time to look, Aigis is anything but. If given allowance for an interesting taste in both headphones and gloves, as well as a dearth of choices in footwear, Aigis was to all the world just a teenage girl in a very well made suit. Her blue eyes and blonde hair could easily be read as those of someone foreign born, or even of mixed parentage, whereas the deep glowing reds and unnatural shiny silver of Labrys’ mark her as something else in her entirety.
Maybe that’s why Aigis’ handlers in the Kirijo Group drilled into her the need to speak like a machine after Labrys’ inherited mannerisms made themselves known. Maybe she reminded them a little too much of themselves in how she acted, even while sending her on tasks that may very well end in her destruction. Maybe they needed that little extra layer of unreality, to pretend she isn’t just a girl being made to be something she shouldn’t have to be.
Like Labrys.
Like… Mama.
“You don’t remember her, right?”
“No.”
For anyone else, Labrys’ question would be a non sequitur. Meaningless mumbling. But not her little sister. Aigis only shakes her head, eyes softening at the edges as they stare into Labrys’ through the mirror’s own unreality.
“I mean, me neither, right?” Labrys chuckles softly, barely opening her mouth for the forced affectation. “Just ‘member things like… her voice, and how she kept trying to get it higher. Her nails, and the polish for ‘em that one of the Kirijo docs snuck her. The one that matched her eyes. Or even…” Labrys pauses, tears trying to force their way to her face before she blinks them away. Her throat tightens… or, rather, doesn’t. Only wishes it could. “...Or even her hair, and how happy she was that she could wear it long in the hospital.”
Aigis steps closer to Labrys, now side by side with her in the mirror. Her gaze slowly drifts away from Labrys’ eyes and to her own. The sisters, so disparate in appearance, stand side by side as they stare into the reflection’s visage.
Alike, but different. Different, but alike. In all the ways that matter, and all the ways that don’t.
…She wonders what Aigis sees when she looks in the mirror. Did some measure of their Mama’s dysphoria reach her, too? Some innate quality of that girl’s memories that screamed to the world, ‘I want to be a girl. I will be a girl!’ that managed to sneak its way through the generations?
Labrys couldn’t be sure.
“I think she was blonde.”
The statement from Aigis is so matter of fact it causes Labrys to do a double take. Blonde??? Labrys is the closest of either of them to true memories of that girl, and even she couldn’t say a single thing about her physical appearance. Even that nail polish of hers was a mystery, changing hues ever so slightly with every memory retrieval. How would Aigis…?
“And she had blue eyes.” Aigis says again, her hand reaching up and trailing her fingers down her temple. Passing over the edge of her eye socket, trailing down to her lips. “She had a mouth like mine. A voice like mine-”
“Sis, I think you’re actin’ a bit cra-”
“-and a heart like mine.” Aigis finishes, ignoring Labrys’ attempt to temper her tangent. Labrys raises her eyebrows at her little sister, who doesn’t look away from the mirror. Doesn’t look away from herself. “A strong, human heart. She was beautiful, just like me.”
“Sis…” Labrys sighs, crossing her arms. Aigis’ hand finally falls away from her shoulder, dropping to her side as she faces Labrys. Labrys shakes her head, turning away from both the mirror and her sister. “I dunno what you’re trying to say.”
“I am not trying to say anything.” Aigis gestures back to the mirror insistently. “Look. See for yourself.”
Labrys’ gaze flicks back to Aigis, who only nods in approval. They stare at one another for a few moments, Labrys’ vision refocusing on the bathroom door and, with it, a potential end to this conversation. Her sister is nosy to a fault, always trying to fix problems that aren’t hers to know about, let alone solve.
…But she’s also as stubborn as a mule and twice as ornery. Labrys likes that part of her a whole hell of a lot. Or well, does, when it isn’t directed right back at her.
With another heavy sigh, Labrys’ attention shifts back into the mirror. Aigis steps back and away, out of sight of the reflection, and leaves Labrys to stare forlornly at herself in the mirror again.
Alone.
Or… maybe not entirely. AIgis is still there, just off to the side. She’s watching Labrys carefully for this exercise of… what, exactly?
“This supposed to be a self affirmation kinda deal?” Labrys says, her hand slowly reaching up to touch her hair. “Like, I say something nice about myself and we move on?”
Aigis says nothing.
Of course she does.
“Okay. Well…” Labrys pauses, doubt on how to proceed seizing her resolve. “I… don’t really have anythin’ nice to say ‘bout myself right now. So… uh… I dunno.”
The silent vigil of her sister continues, eliciting a burst of frustrated noise to bubble in Labrys’ throat. What a time to go quiet, huh? Whatever. Be that way.
“Wonder what Mama would think if she saw me.” Labrys says aloud, leaning forward against the sink. “I dunno about the color, but…” Labrys fingers trail down the length of her hair, softly skirting around the metallic constructs finding home there. “...She’d have been floored if her hair could be this long.”
Even if Labrys can’t picture the girl's face, she can just imagine the laugh she’d have if the two had met. The girl asking Labrys to sit on her bed so she could tug on her hair. Asking- no, begging to be allowed to style it. To put to practice all those techniques from the magazines she always read.
“And, uh…” Labrys’ fingers trail down her face, like Aigis had done, coming to rest beside her eyes. She traces her brow, softly rolling across the surface of her face and the humming machinery just beneath. “Red eyes ain’t exactly human, y’know? But, uhm…”
Vague imagery from the perspective of a girl clapping her hands in excitement from the comfort of her hospital bed fills Labrys’ mind. Red balloons and red streamers are strewn across the room, as a collection of people in lab coats politely applaud. One of them hands the girl a present, wrapped with a bow which is quickly torn off by the excited birthday girl as inside a heavy red comforter is found. Just in time for the winter.
“I think… I think it might have been her favorite color.” Labrys finishes. Little drops of moisture form in the corner of her eyes, ones she wipes away with a quick rub of her wrist against her face. She shudders, slightly, in the wake of such a profound memory. “I think she’d have loved them. C-coulda… gotten her some colored contacts, maybe? For h-her next birthday.”
A birthday that didn’t come.
“And I, uh…” Labrys’ finger trails down to her lips, softly brushing against the flushed silicone it’s made of. “I know I’ve got her voice. Or, her accent, at the very least. Guess I should thank her for that.”
Her fingers trail down past her head, down to her chest. The suits fabric is plush beneath her fingers, but that is not… exactly what she’s looking for. The designers, for whatever reason when designing the two of them, built them to at least approximate the shape of some archetypical human girl. A vague suggestion of a chest, the bump of a waist. Nothing too egregious, even if utterly redundant for what should be two weapons platforms.
But… that girl could only dream of something like this. A body like hers, whatever its material.
“Don’t think she’d care for the suit though.” Labrys tugs at the collar, pinching it between her fingers. “Maybe something just as smart, but with a skirt?”
“I can put in a request to Mitsuru, if you would like.”
Aigis steps back into the reflection of the mirror, reaching her hand out and lightly resting it on Labrys’ forearm. Her words break the small silence she had been keeping up till now, drawing a ragged smile from Labrys.
“What, now you’re talkin’? I said she’d like it, not me.” Labrys shrugs off Aigis’ hand before slinging her own arm around her sister’s shoulders and tugging her close. “Never said nothin’ ‘bout me wearing a dress.”
“Fair enough.” Aigis smiles softly at the close contact, their eyes meeting in the mirror as she puts an arm around Labrys’ waist and tugs her right back. “The option is there if you wish it. I am sure we could make it work.”
“We could make anything work, sis. You better believe it!” Labrys giggles, rocking from side to side as she tugs Aigis along with her. The two rock back and forth in the mirror, softly smiling at one another. “Just wish… Just wish she could see us now. See what we’ve done. What you’ve done. Saved the freakin’ world and all.”
“Yes. Well…” Aigis allows herself to be rocked back and forth, lightly resting her head against her sister’s shoulder. “I had help. We all need help, from time to time.”
“Yeah, yeah… I get it.” Labrys softly exhales as she slows to a stand still, her attention slowly drifting away from Aigis and back to herself. It feels less like an affectation now, the act of breathing. It's something she should remember not to take for granted. “She loves us, y’know.”
“‘Loves’? Not ‘loved’?” Her sister’s attention never leaves Labrys, who catches the narrowing of the brow out of the corner of her eye.
“Nah. Loves, for sure.” Labrys nods decisively, reaching up to brush a strand of hair from her face. “And the least I can do for her is…” She gulps, forcing down the hard pill resting in the back of her throat. “...I-is to learn how to love myself, too. To let me love myself.”
“It can be difficult, sometimes.” Aigis whispers softly, as her eyes drift away, back to her own reflection. “Maybe that is a skill best learned through another’s eyes.”
“Hey, maybe.” Labrys’ sniffs, wiping her wrist against the corner of her eye again to drive away that last bit of moisture. She turns toward Aigis, her own voice dropping down to match hers. “Do you have someone like that, sis?”
“I did.” Aigis tenses for just the briefest of moments, and Labrys doesn't need any deep connection to the Sea of Souls to tell that she stepped a bit too close to an old hurt. But Aigis, after another moment, relaxes. She exhales softly, gripping Labrys just a bit tighter. “I do. She will always be with me.”
“That’s love.”
The two sisters share a smile, as they stare into the mirror together. Labrys’ beautiful, shimmering hair nestling softly in her sister's golden blonde. Their eyes match like a matching pair of rubies and sapphires, shimmering in the dim light of the room. Labrys can’t help but giggle, her voice soon joined in a chorus with her sister’s. The sounds mingle gorgeously, echoing warmly around them. A softness between the pair, belying the metal beneath.
Labrys hopes that she can hear them. That she can see them.
Because these two will fight to be the girls she should have always had the chance to be.