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Three months.
Three months since Delilah came into their lives. Three months of sleepless nights, countless diaper changes, fleeting moments spent breastfeeding, endless laundry piles, and an abundance of smiles, giggles, and cherished memories.
Ah, yes. Three months have passed and, if she had to, she'd do it all over again just to savor these precious moments with her sweet pea.
Delilah was a beautiful baby girl. A happy, healthy child, and the moment anyone laid eyes on her, there was no question about who her parents were. Her hair, curly and as white as snow, mirrored her father’s. Her eyes, green as the earth, sparkled like her mother’s, and when she smiled, those adorable dimples were a perfect blend of both.
Rogue adored her daughter, but Erik? Oh, Erik spoiled his precious little girl. What father wouldn’t? It was clear Erik was a total "girl dad"—though he’d always deny it, the countless adorable outfits he bought for her told a different story.
But in the end, what truly mattered was how much this small babe had brightened their world. In a world full of anti-mutant sentiment, Delilah’s innocence was a balm to their hearts. Each day, Erik and Rogue prayed for a better future for their daughter. But the future could wait; for now, they wanted to savor the present, holding on to the fleeting days when she was still so small.
Still, even the purest joy could be overwhelming, especially for a new mother like Rogue.
Even Erik could sense how exhausting motherhood had become for his wife. He couldn’t fault her for it. He knew how much she adored their daughter. Erik had always been proactive, eager to assist with every aspect of raising Delilah. Whether it was bottle-feeding or keeping her entertained while Rogue caught up on rest, he was there without hesitation.
But even with his constant help, it was evident that Rogue needed a break. As a devoted husband, he understood her need for some time to herself, and so, with a soft smile, he suggested they go out for dinner, just the two of them, a night off as a couple.
Naturally, as with most new mothers, Rogue was hesitant. The idea of leaving Delilah, even for just a few hours, felt almost impossible. After all, she had been so closely tied to their daughter since the moment of conception. The thought of separation, no matter how brief, was unsettling. But Erik, ever the reassuring presence, promised her that Delilah would be in good hands with Lorna, who had always been helpful when the family needed assistance. Besides, it would also give Lorna an opportunity to bond with her baby sister.
The mention of Lorna eased Rogue’s nerves. She trusted her implicitly, especially since Lorna shared the same mutant power as Erik. Knowing their daughter would be safe and cared for allowed Rogue to finally relax. Reluctantly, but with a sense of relief, she agreed.
Oh, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t excited. After all, it had been three months since she and Erik had any time to themselves. Their last real break had been their babymoon, a relaxing cruise to the Bahamas, a month before Delilah was born. It felt like a lifetime ago. Perhaps Erik was right in taking some time away for themselves, help rekindle their bond, remind them of the connection they’d shared before parenthood.
Yet, there was a problem. Rogue wasn’t ready to leave. Not yet. And the reason? It was painfully clear to any woman who had gone through what she was experiencing right now. Rogue had convinced herself that she was prepared for this moment, that a few hours away would be just what she needed. But as she stood in front of the mirror, fully dressed with her hair and makeup done, something unexpected happened. Her reflection didn’t match the vision she had in her mind. The confident, glowing woman she thought she would see wasn’t there. Instead, insecurity crept in, twisting her stomach.
She held the red dress with tiny white flowers up to her body, examining the fit. It should have been perfect, but it wasn’t. The fabric clung to her in all the wrong places and the woman staring back at her from the mirror wasn’t the one she had hoped for. With a heavy sigh, she tossed the dress onto the bed, frustration building. There she was, standing in front of the mirror, completely off track.
Rogue was not the same woman she had been before. The strength and muscle tone she had once prided herself on had softened, her body forever changed by the journey of motherhood. Her curves, once defined and sharp, now felt unfamiliar to her as she stood there in front of the mirror. She had always been strong, confident in her skin, but now, she wasn’t sure who she was looking at. The changes weren’t just physical. They felt like a shift in her very identity.
The woman who had once slipped into any dress with ease, feeling powerful and poised, now found herself scrutinizing every inch of her reflection. The red dress she threw on the bed, which had seemed perfect when she first imagined it, highlighted all the places she felt most vulnerable. She ran her fingers over her waist, as if she could somehow erase the changes that had come with motherhood.
But no matter how hard she tried, no matter how much she wished for the stretch marks and her postpartum belly to disappear, she couldn’t shake the feeling that she wasn’t the same person anymore. And that left her feeling more uncertain than she cared to admit.
“Rogue? Are you ready, my dear?” Erik called from behind the closed door, his voice warm and patient. But before she could respond, the door creaked open, and he stepped inside, a soft smile tugging at his lips.
Rogue’s heart skipped a beat, startled by his sudden appearance. In a swift, instinctive motion, she grabbed for her robe, pulling it around her as if the fabric could shield her from the vulnerability she was feeling.
“You’re not yet dressed,” Erik remarked, his eyes flicking to the red dress laid out on the bed. At first, one might have assumed she was simply running late. Yet, there was something in the air that told him otherwise. His sharp gaze noticed the subtle tension in Rogue’s posture, the way she fidgeted with her robe as if trying to hide from something. She wasn’t just avoiding the dress. She was avoiding him.
“Something is troubling you.” He said softly and with concern. He wasn’t fooled by her attempts to dismiss it. After all, he knew his wife better than anyone. The slight tightness in her shoulders, the way her gaze darted away, it all screamed that something deeper was at play.
Rogue opened her mouth to respond, but her voice faltered. “I-it’s nothing, Erik. Just that...” Her words trailed off and she clenched her fists in the folds of her robe, struggling to find the right words.
Erik stepped closer, his presence steady and grounding. He didn’t press her immediately, but his expression softened with understanding. “Rogue, I know you and I know when something’s on your mind. You don’t have to hide it from me. I only ask that you be honest with me just as I am with you.”
For a long moment, Rogue stood there as her breath caught in her throat when she glanced at her reflection in the mirror once more. She didn’t want to burden him with her insecurities, but the weight of them felt too heavy to carry alone. Finally, she sighed, her voice barely above a whisper. “Ah just... Ah don’t feel like me anymore, Erik.”
Erik raised an eyebrow, his gaze softening as he studied her, trying to understand what had suddenly shifted her mood. “What do you mean?”
Rogue tightened her grip on the robe she wore, her fingers trembling slightly. “It’s… my body. Ah just… Ah don’t recognize it. Ah knew what Ah was signing up for when Ah was pregnant with Delilah. Ah knew there would be changes, that it was part of becoming a mother. But there are days when Ah look at myself, really look, and it’s like Ah’m staring at a stranger. Clothes that used to fit me. Hell, the ones Ah used to love don’t even look right on me anymore.”
Erik moved closer to her, his voice soft but determined. “I can see it, yes. And despite all the changes, you’re still as beautiful as ever. If the clothes are the problem, we can always find something new. Something that will fit you comfortably.”
The young woman sighed, her shoulders sagging with frustration as she glanced away. “Ah don’t think it would make a difference.”
Erik shook his head with a soft chuckle, a small, affectionate smile curving his lips. “Nonsense, my dear. There’s always a way to make it work.” His gaze softened as he moved toward the closet, his eyes flicking over the rows of clothes with practiced ease. “What about that beautiful dress you wore when we vacationed at the Bahamas? The one that made you look like a goddess?”
Rogue blinked, surprised when he mentioned that dress. She had almost forgotten about it. “For tonight?”
Erik raised an eyebrow, his confidence unhesitant. “Why not? You looked radiant in it then and I have no doubt you'll light up the room tonight, as well.”
Rogue bit her lip, her anxiety rising. “Erik, it won’t look as good as you remember. Maybe this was a mistake.” She hesitated, the weight of her uncertainty settling in. “Maybe we should just cancel dinner.”
“But you were so eager for tonight.” Erik said gently, his concern growing as he watched her retreat into uncertainty. He stepped forward, pulling the dress she had worn in the Bahamas from the closet. It was a stunning ombre dress that shifted from deep azure to a soft, almost ethereal blue. Quite flowy and surely loose enough for her to be comfortable in it all night. He carefully laid it out on the bed, smoothing out the fabric. “I’m sure this dress will still fit you perfectly.”
Her patience ended and she suddenly snapped at her husband, shaking her head in frustration. “Oh my God, Erik! Don’t you get it? It’s not about the clothes! It’s not about looking perfect or putting on a pretty dress.” She continued, her voice shaking but more determined. “It’s about how Ah feel, Erik. How Ah feel in my own skin. How everything’s changed and Ah’m just… lost in it, okay?”
Erik nearly flinched when Rogue shouted at him, the sound of her voice cracking caught him completely off guard. It was sudden, her words filled with a pain he hadn’t expected. His heart tightened, a pang of guilt running through him as he watched her stand there, her frustration and hurt laid bare before him.
“Ah don’t get it, Erik. Ah really don’t. Ah mean how can ya still look at me like that with those big blue ol’ eyes of yours and think Ah’m still the most beautiful woman in the whole wide world.” Her hands were shaking at her sides, a mix of anger and vulnerability flooding her words. She couldn’t understand it. How could he still see her that way when she felt so far from the woman she used to be?
Erik’s expression softened, his gaze never leaving hers, filled with a quiet, unwavering affection. He took a slow breath, then replied, his voice gentle but firm, the weight of his words carrying the truth he knew in his heart. “But you are, my darling.”
“How? Look at me, Erik! Ah’m still carrying the weight. My breasts are swollen more than they were when Ah was pregnant, and Ah look and feel like a mess. And no matter how many times Ah try working out, my belly never goes away. It’s so damn stubborn no matter how many pushups Ah try or how much Ah sweat. Ah look like Ah haven’t been taking care of myself, but it’s ‘cause Ah’ve been too busy taking care of Delilah.”
Rogue bit her lip, desperately trying to hold back tears. Her throat tightened, and she could feel the lump rising as her words spilled out, raw and unfiltered. “But what do you know about it? You haven’t gone through what women like me do, physically. And now… this body, this woman in the mirror… she’s not the one Ah remember.”
Erik stood still, his heart aching for her. He didn’t try to interrupt or offer a solution right away. He simply allowed her to have this moment, to release the frustration and pain she’d been bottling up. He knew it wasn’t easy for her, and perhaps this outburst, however harsh it seemed, was something she truly needed. This was really all about the fear and exhaustion that had been weighing her down, unseen by most.
“Rogue...” Erik’s voice was soft yet filled with a quiet understanding. He could see the discomfort written on her face, the insecurity that had taken over her entire being. It broke his heart to see her like this, feeling so lost in her own skin. He now wondered if maybe going out tonight was such a good idea in the end. After all, Erik merely wanted to help give his wife a break, a moment to relax and indulge over a nice meal. As much as he wished he could ease her pain, he knew there was no simple fix, no quick reassurance that could undo what she was feeling.
No, as a man, he could never truly, deeply, fully understand what a woman goes through physically, mentally, and emotionally postpartum. He could never comprehend the battle she was facing with herself, the way her body had changed in ways that no amount of love could immediately heal. But as her husband, he vowed on their wedding day to care for her in sickness and in health, in moments of joy and in times of struggle. Tonight, this, her uncertainty and her pain, was part of that vow. And he would be there, every step of the way.
He reached out slowly and carefully as not to startle her. Gently, he cupped her face in his hands. His touch was warm, steady, grounding. He guided her to look at him, his gaze unwavering, full of love and devotion. “You are still the woman I married, Rogue. You always have been and you always will be. I did not marry you for your body. I married you for the soul you carry with such tremendous force. That very soul which anchors me through my many storms and keeps me steady.”
Rogue’s chest tightened at his words, the depth of his love cutting through her insecurities like a knife. She swallowed hard, trying to steady herself, but his words echoed in her heart. He loved her for who she was, not what she looked like.
Then, gently, Erik removed his hands from her face and turned her toward the mirror. He wanted her to look at herself, to see herself with the same reverence he saw her with. But Rogue hesitated. She couldn’t bear the thought of facing her reflection. She flinched as Erik began to slide the robe from her shoulders, the fabric falling softly to the floor. She closed her eyes, unwilling to face herself. She couldn't bring herself to look at the woman in the mirror, the woman who felt foreign, unfamiliar. The one who was so different from the person she used to know.
Erik stood behind her, his presence steady and unwavering, but his voice was soft, coaxing her to open her eyes. “Look at yourself, Rogue. I want you to see what I see.”
She shook her head slightly, her voice barely a whisper. “Ah can't. Ah... Ah don't know her anymore."
“Yes, you do.” Erik said gently, his hands resting on her shoulders. “You just need to remember. The woman you are now is just as beautiful, just as powerful, just as worthy as the woman you were before.” His hands moved away from her shoulders as he began to trail them down her body, touching every curve, every stretch marks, every fiber of her being. “Yes, your body has indeed gone through changes. You’ve endured in many battles, both personally and on the field. Yet, this battle helped create life.”
Gently, his hands trailed towards her breasts, now heavy and full than they were before. He was careful, stroking the warm flesh, his fingers grazing over her perky nipples that sent shivers down Rogue’s spine. “Your breasts are so plump and full of your milk to nourish our daughter, to keep her strong and healthy.”
Then, his hands grazed down toward the curves of her waistline, his touch tender and reverent as he stroked over the stretch marks that had appeared during her pregnancy. “Your skin stretched to make room for our growing daughter. With it, marks have been left behind to show the resilience of your flesh. These marks resemble sunlight in water. And here.”
Erik’s hands, warm and gentle, found their way to her postpartum belly. His touch was so soft, so tender, it felt as if it were speaking in a language of love, conveying all the emotions he could never fully express. He ran his fingers over the curves of her stomach, the place where their child had once grown, and the connection between them felt as if it transcended the physical.
“And right here is my favorite.” He whispered, his voice thick with emotion. “Because this is where you carried our child safely, where you protected her, where you nurtured her. You’ve given so much, Rogue.” His gaze locked with hers, deep and unwavering, as if he were trying to pour all the love he felt for her into those simple words. “And that strength is still within you. It’s always been there.”
Rogue’s breath hitched at the sensation of his hands on her skin, the warmth of his touch grounding her, soothing the raw nerves she hadn’t even realized were so tightly wound. She had been so consumed by the changes in her body, so lost in the unfamiliar reflection she saw in the mirror.
But in Erik’s hands, in his words, she felt something else, something beautiful, something sacred. She had carried their daughter. She had created life. And that was not something to be ashamed of. Rogue saw the eyes of a mother, a partner, a warrior. The same soul that Erik had fallen in love with, still shining through. She saw herself in a new light, not as someone less than she had been, but as someone who had grown, who had given so much, and still had so much to offer. Tears welled in her eyes as his words sank deeper, reaching into the parts of her heart that had felt broken, vulnerable, uncertain.
That strength is still within you.
And slowly, with Erik gentle touches, she began to believe it. She turned her head slightly to meet his gaze, the depth of his love shining through. “You really mean that, don't you?”
“With all my heart.” Erik replied, his voice steady, filled with warmth and devotion. His hands remained resting on her soft belly, a silent reassurance that spoke louder than any words ever could. His touch was grounding, comforting, an anchor in the storm of her insecurities.
He leaned forward, his breath warm against her ear as he spoke in a husky whisper, a grin tugging at the corners of his lips. “Every part of you is exquisite, Rogue. Like a goddess divine and I am but your loyal worshipper.”
Rogue’s eyes sparkled with mischief, her lips curling into a playful smile as she leaned back against him, her body pressing into his. "Is that so?" She asked, her voice teasing, the warmth of his words sending a flutter through her chest. The teasing tone in her voice was a far cry from the vulnerability she had felt earlier, and it felt like a little victory, the weight of her doubts slipping away bit by bit.
Erik chuckled softly, his arms tightening around her, clearly enjoying the playful turn of the moment. “Oh, absolutely.” His lips brushed against her ear once more, sending a wave of warmth through her. His voice was low, filled with both tenderness and playful desire. “If we didn’t have dinner planned out, I would have you be drawn like this. My favorite muse. So naturally enchanting.”
Rogue’s breath caught at the suggestion, her heart fluttering in her chest. She could feel the weight of his words, the sincerity behind them, and she felt a small shiver run through her. She leaned back into him, her body pressed against his.
“Or I could take you right here in our bed.” Then he chuckled as he pressed a warm, lingering kiss to her neck. His lips were soft against her skin, the touch a quiet promise of love. “Either way, what bliss.”
“Erik!” Rogue shivered at the sensation, the warmth of his kiss sending a ripple of pleasure through her. She smiled softly, her earlier insecurities dissolving in the heat of the moment, replaced by the undeniable connection between them. “Ya sure know how to make a gal feel very special.” She teased him, her voice playful but carried genuine affection.
Erik’s eyes sparkled with amusement as he pulled back slightly, his hands still resting on her, holding her close. “It’s easy when you’re as incredible as you are, Rogue. You are my inspiration.”
Rogue’s cheeks flushed a soft pink, and shivers raced down her spine until she couldn’t help but giggle, the tension in her body melting away. Each kiss he pressed to her skin seemed to wash away her insecurities, one by one, until all that remained was a quiet, gentle joy.
Erik smiled at the sound of her laughter, a warmth flooding his chest. He gently turned her around to face him, his hand settling tenderly on her cheek. The touch was light as he gazed down at her with unspoken affection.
“Ah’m sorry Ah snapped at ya.” Rogue said, her voice softening with genuine remorse. She looked up at him, her eyes searching his as the weight of her outburst sank in. “Ah know you weren’t tryin’ ta upset me or anything. You were showing good intentions with me.”
Erik smiled and he offered her a gentle kiss to her forehead. “You don’t need to apologize. I understand. You’ve been carrying so much, and sometimes, it’s just too much to hold in. I know you’ll have your days, days like today where you feel less than radiant.” He said softly, his voice filled with understanding. “I won’t tell you how you should feel. That’s not for me to decide.”
His thumb traced the curve of her cheek, his blue eyes never leaving hers. “But I will continue to remind you every single day just how incredible you are to me. How you are just as radiant as ever, no matter what.”
The weight of his words mixed with the tenderness of his touch softened Rogue’s heart. She found herself leaning into him, her breath slowing as she let his love sink in, allowing it to fill the spaces where doubt once lived. In that moment, she really believed him.
Yes, in time, she would have her moments like this again. Moments where insecurity crept in, where she will question the changes her body had gone through, where she felt disconnected from the person she once was. It was only natural, especially postpartum when her body seemed to carry the weight of both new life and the adjustment it came with it. There would be days where the mirror didn’t reflect what she wanted to see and the doubts will sink in.
But as she stood here with Erik, his touch grounding her, his words filling her with a sense of peace, Rogue knew deep down that it wouldn’t last forever. These moments, as heavy as they felt, were just that. Time will pass and, in time, she would come to accept and embrace the changes that came with motherhood and the strength that lay within them.
If they were to have more children in the future, perhaps Rogue could learn to be a little kinder to herself. To see the beauty in every curve, every scar, every sign of the life she had nurtured and brought into the world and one day understand that her worth was never defined just by the reflection in the mirror.
For now, in this quiet moment, she allowed herself to simply be.
Enough, just as she was.