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The first time Beomgyu sees Yeonjun, his body involuntarily exhales with relief. 

Yeonjun, a red haired guy with a nice, welcoming smile and open posture, looks nothing close to what Beomgyu's brain could classify as worrying or concerning. Which is already half of a success. When Yeonjun opens his mouth for the first time, Beomgyu is sure that the boy in front of him is harmless and his precious life won't experience a drastic downturn. 

It all started when Soobin, his long term best friend and also a roomate of two years, has told him, with a deep frown, that the landlord is rising their rent. Again. But it's not in a "oh, he's such a fucking dick" way anymore. At this point, the costs are concerning. The costs travel beyond what Soobin and Beomgyu can muster out of their wallets. 

Beomgyu, hearing that, let out a loud groan and plop down on the couch next to Soobin. They both stupidly look at the e-mail from their landlord, almost like if glaring at it could make it dissapear. Unsurprisingly, the very same e-mail is still here and they have little over a month to figure their shit out. It's also not like life is offering them a lot of opportunities - their apartment is close to their campus and close to Soobin's work. It's placed in a really comfortable place, close to the metro and literally anything else two guys could possibly need. Not to mention they actually have a fully furnished apartment, two bathrooms, an okay-ish sized kitchen with a full living room too. Getting rid of that place, only because they can't afford it, would be like deepthroating a massive L. They sit there in silence, occasionally looking at each other, both of them expecting the other one to come across with a life-changing solution. 

However, for a long time, it's just the silence part. No grand solutions in sight. 

Soobin is the first one to break that marasm, sighing. "For starters, we do not have any other options than to suck it in and pay the higher rent."

"Woah, really?" Beomgyu gives him a deadpan look. "Well, as much as I would like to end this conversation here, I think one of us would have to actually sell dick picks online to afford it."

"You're stupid, no one's buying dick picks." Soobin puffed, almost in annoyance. "Overally speaking, if I had taken couple more shifts, then maybe, but I emphasise, maybe, we could make it work."

"Soobin, please, you barely have time to sleep, you can't take any more. I'm not allowing it." Beomgyu shook his head, tsking his tongue like it was the most stupid idea ever.

"Do you have any other ideas, though? Since we already established that we must stay here, someone gotta cover the rent, right? And it's not exactly like you make millions of your work." He had replied, but his voice lacked any bite. Clearly just an observation. 

"Right, yeah, that's fair."

Silence. 

Even more silence. 

A sharp inhale of air straight to Soobin's lungs. 

"Wait! I think I know what we can do!" Soobin suddenly gasped, almost like if surprised by his own idea himself. "We have that spare room between our own ones, right?"

"Yes? Did you really needed my confirmation?" Beomgyu answered, only because Soobin dramatically stopped, clearly expecting one.

"Okay, okay, whatever. What if we got another roommate? If we split by three, the rent wouldn't even be that catastrophic. Maybe even less than what we used to pay, just two of us." 

As much as Beomgyu was completely not thrilled by the idea of a stranger living with them, he nodded instantly, sucking his annoyance in. Now's not the time to complain, was his second thought. 

"Do you have anyone in mind?" Beomgyu decided to go with. 

That was pretty much the reason why Choi Yeonjun was at their front doors, one luggage in hand, couple more bags already thrown on the floor. The red haired guy was a friend of Soobin's, not actually the closest one if he considered it thoroughly, but a close one indeed. What was important - Yeonjun was trusted. Trusted by Soobin, so Beomgyu had nothing against that. However, it didn't grasp the fear away. How could it?

Beomgyu wasn't a big fan of changes. And letting a stranger, at least a stranger to him, just get into their space, open their fridge like it was his (because it is his technically too now), casually laying on the couch - it sounded weird. Beomgyu wouldn't ever want to not feel comfortable in his own apartment. Soobin had told Beomgyu over and over. Yeonjun was chill, he's normal, a decent guy. 

Well, if Beomgyu got asked, he wouldn't quite classify Soobin as a normal guy, which kind of went against his judgement on whever someone was or wasn't normal. 

However, the way Yeonjun had shaken Beomgyu's hand, smiled at him politely, promised to not cause any chaos in their domestic life - it made Beomgyu easen his senses. Clearly the guy's not a handful, right. Right. 

Not only couple weeks later, Beomgyu would have a different opinion on that. Calling Yeonjun handful? Clearly a big fucking undestatment. 

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At first, Beomgyu doesn't even feel any changes. Yeonjun seemed to be living a complete different pace of life; they didn't run into each other on mornings, their paths didn't cross at evenings, when both of them could possibly want to use the same bathroom. Yeonjun is like a ghost and as much as Beomgyu is aware that he's actually here, he isn't concerned. The only time they see each other is when Beomgyu is spread on the couch like a cat and Yeonjun is walking past him to go to the balcony. Probably to smoke or god-knows-what, just stand there stiffly. If they talk, the conversations are short, practical. 

"Hey, do you guys have any schedule of groceries runs?" Yeonjun would ask one day.

"No, if you see anything's missing, just grab it. Honestly, me and Soobin never really counted it down to the cent, we just agreed it probably cuts even. However, if you want to be on a clear page, we can keep the receipts and balance the difference."

"What?" Yeonjun laughed, genuinely bewildered by that official ass answer. "I don't mind too." 

And just like that, he'd leave the room, closing the doors behind him. Alright, Beomgyu would think after each of those short exchanges of words. He can live with Yeonjun. 

Until he couldn't. 

Yeonjun quickly appeared to be a mystery. At first, he seemed really put in place, probably focused on whatever course he was majoring in, Beomgyu didn't even care to ask. Slowly, he'd unravel his more questionable personality. Beomgyu fell the victim to it. 

The first moment that left Beomgyu confused, had happened when he was making himself a quick snack in the kitchen. He had heard the footsteps echoing through the hallway, suspected Soobin coming to grab himself a mug of tea, didn't think of it much. Then, a hand on his hip. What the fuck? 

He whiplashed his head around and saw Yeonjun, casually towering over him, his hand steadying himself. His hand on Beomgyu's hip, to add. He seemed totally unbothered by that obvious invasion of any sense of personal space, just trying to grab a plate from the higher cabinet.

"What are you doing?" Beomgyu asked him, voice a little too accusatory. 

"Nothing?" Yeonjun replied to him, feigning confusion. "Well, grabbing a plate?" 

Just like that, he finally grabbed that damn plate and took his hand away from Beomgyu's body, stiff as ever. Beomgyu looked at him, his expression completely stunned. He didn't know if Yeonjun was this fucking dense by nature, thinking that it was normal to act like that around someone you don't even know, or if it was some sort of a statement. 

"That was weird." Beomgyu had muttered, turning his head back to his unfinished smoothie. 

"Don't see anything weird about it, though." 

Beomgyu was just about to turn around for another time, a sarcastic remark forming on his tongue, but Yeonjun was already gone. What did he even need this plate for if he had left without making himself any food? 

After couple minutes to analyze the situation, Beomgyu had realised that he was probably just overreacting. Maybe it was a casual instinct thing, nothing to tear apart because of. He had made his smoothie and returned to living his life full of struggles. Time passed quickly when you were a literature major and his brain got clouded by worse issues than Yeonjun acting weird once. 

But Yeonjun didn't act weird once. It just got worse. As Beomgyu was sitting on the edge of the couch, a laptop perched on his lap, lips pursing in the last ounces of focus he could muster out of himself, Yeonjun sat down next to him. A little too close, but that was a marginental observation. 

"You look cute when you're focused like that." 

What? what?

"Hey, did you hear me? You look cute when you're focused." Yeonjun had the nerve to repeat, clearly needy of an answer.

"Yes, I've heard you." Beomgyu said, not taking his eyes out of his laptop screen.

"So? No comment about that observation?"

"No, not any other from the fact that you're weird. I'm kind of busy, see?" Beomgyu pointed vaguely toward his laptop, begging Yeonjun internally to get a fucking hint. 

"But you're always busy, though. I just want to talk, you know?" The red haired boy said, his lips pursing in something close to a pout. 

Yeonjun's hands traced circles around his own jeans material, looking at Beomgyu with big, expectant eyes. Beomgyu really, honest to God, didn't know what Yeonjun wanted from him. He finally look up, giving him a puzzled, slightly fussy look. To be fair, it wasn't even Yeonjun making him so annoyed. The deadline was in about fifteen minutes and he was nowhere close to being done. Yeonjun, completely oblivious to the tense atmosphere striking in the room, scooted closer to Beomgyu. 

"Please, Yeonjun, I'm really stressing out because of this assigment." 

"Why are you so fussy, Beomgyu? I'm just sitting here." Yeonjun shrugged, even taking his phone in his hand, feigning that he's genuinely just lazying around.

"Yeah, but do you have to sit here when I'm clearly about to rip my hair off my scalp? You have your own room too, right?" 

"Okay, okay, I'll keep it down tonight, then." Yeonjun would give him a loopsided smile, standing up slowly. "But if you want me to keep you company, just knock on my doors, alright?"

Those comments, they kind of floted around often. Yeonjun would make sure to flower Beomgyu with at least one compliment a day. They'd be loaded with an ounce of flirty tone, too. You're cute when you pout like that. That outfit is so cute, where did you get it? Your hairstyle matches you so well, I love long hair, you know? What got Beomgyu, though, was that they were said with a wicked intention. At least that's how he understood the situation. Yeonjun was saying it casually, painfully so, almost. Like he was just noticing that the weather is nice. 

Yeonjun didn't seem interested in Beomgyu at all, he had no intentions on stirring an actual conversation, getting to know each other. He'd just give Beomgyu a rectulant compliment and clearly expect a reaction because of it. 

And even if Beomgyu thought that Yeonjun has a thing for him, it would crumble soon enough. 

Beomgyu didn't even know that Yeonjun had invited someone over, until he would hear a very, painfully obvious moan echoing through the wall. Another one, then another one, followed by another one. Some squeakings of the bed, couple "oh, just like that", clearly said by Yeonjun. No fucking way, Beomgyu thought, as the realisation slowly crept in. Yeonjun was getting his dick sucked just on the other side of the wall. It's not like it was forbidden, good for him, honestly. Beomgyu just wasn't used to it. Soobin was quite a loser in that department, or at least, he didn't put his ministrations on show in their shared apartment. 

Beomgyu really didn't want to eavesdrop Yeonjun having sex, but the curiosity got better of him rather quickly. They shared a wall, after all, it was rather hard to not listen to it, even involuntarily. Soon enough, Yeonjun was dicking someone down, a girl, or a guy, it was hard to decipt for sure. It was clearly a passionate experience and by the end of it, all Beomgyu felt was a deep sense of shame that his ear stayed glued to that damn wall. 

The same evening, him and Yeonjun met in the hallway, Yeonjun exiting the bathroom, giving Beomgyu that same, loopsided smile. Beomgyu smiled back, a little forced. 

"Hey, why are you not asleep?" Yeonjun asked casually, flicking the light off. 

Beomgyu shruged at that, feigning that he was just too focused on something. Because you were fucking someone in the room next to me were the words that died on his tongue. 

"Just stuff, you know? Some college things had to be finished. How about you?" 

"Oh, I had a girl over, you know?" Yeonjun admitted without an scrap of awkwardness. "She left, though, so I'll go to sleep just now. Goodnight, Beomie." 

Oh, he was so fucking weird. And maybe Beomgyu was screwed too, because at some point, he started looking forward to Yeonjun's dumb antics, dumb compliments and just his dumb ass in general. 

The moment he manages to catch Soobin in the living room, the words spill out of him. Beomgyu leaned against the counter, trying to appear casual. 

"Hey, don't you think Yeonjun is kind of weird?" Beomgyu asked, testing the waters. Soobin and Yeonjun were friends after all, it's not like he could shade him right away.

"Weird how?" He raised an eyebrow, not concerned yet.

"It's just, I don't know, he seems so casual about everything, like-" He stopped for a second, gathering his thoughts. "it's like he has absolute no boundaries or whatever."

"I don't really understand what you're talking about, Gyu." Soobin shruged, but still seemed interested enough to actually grasp onto what Beomgyu was trying to tell him. "To me, he's not causing any issues. He's mostly quiet, clean after himself and most importantly - he helps us pay the damn rent."

"Alright, I'm not saying he is messy or loud, okay? He's acting weird towards me. He's being all smug and flirty for no apparent reason! Which doesn't make sense, because he had fucked a girl really thoroughly last night." He dared to point out.

At that, Soobin laughed, carefree, almost in amusement. "Good for him, I mean? What's wrong with that?"

"Did you hear the first part?" Beomgyu deadpanned.

"I did, but I don't really think Yeonjun is all that serious. Maybe he has that flirty nature, or maybe he's messing with you, because you're really responsive."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"It means that you're really easy to bring a reaction out of. You get irritated instantly and some people like being brats to others. Maybe Yeonjun's one of those." Soobin shruged, flipping a page in his notebook.

Beomgyu sighed, of course he overestimated Soobin's skills of comprehension. Or maybe Soobin was right and it was him building all that mystery around Yeonjun where there wasn't any. Maybe those flirty remarks were really made out of pure amusement. If yes, Beomgyu felt like a damn joke. 

And he didn't know why Yeonjun and the whole bringing-girls-over made him so mad. He had no bussiness being annoyed that Yeonjun was having fun. Even if it was weird that it was a different girl everytime. There was also one guy too, but that wasn't the point. The point was that Beomgyu still believed Yeonjun had absolute no sense of boundaries. When he had come back to Soobin with that little update about Yeonjun's sex life, he seemed similary unbothered. 

"He's at college, man. People fuck around all the time. Yeonjun is hot on top of that, what is stopping him?" 

And Soobin was right, of fucking course.

From that point, Beomgyu made it his greatest will to ignore Yeonjun. He was doing well until he actually needed help. His computer was acting up, one error after another and he was on brink of crying. His poor document was about to get vanished into the digital heaven. He would've turned to Soobin for help, but actually, Soobin was having a sleepover with Taehyun. His last option would be Yeonjun. No, I'm not doing it, he thought. 

His strong will lasted five minutes at most and he was knocking at Yeonjun's doors. As he stood here, he realised that he had never even entered that room before. Yeonjun never invited him and neither Beomgyu felt invited too. The doors opened, exposing a sight to behold. 

Yeonjun, standing there, shirtless, with hair sligthly toussed, looked at him, genuinely confused. Beomgyu made an instant mental note to keep his eyes focused on his face, rather his ridiculously toned chest and smiled awkwardly. He catched a glimpse of his room, too. The lights were dim, a red string of fairy lights hanging on the top of the walls. A bookshelf, bed with undone covers, some clutter on the ground. Nothing groundbreaking, honestly. 

"Hey, so, I need help with my computer. There are bunch of errors and I don't know how to fix it." He admitted, scratching the back of his head. 

Yeonjun smiled at him, opening the doors wider. "Alright, alright. I'll be here in a second, okay? Just let me put on a shirt." 

And soon enough, Yeonjun would enter Beomgyu's sacred space. He made his route straight to Beomgyu's desk, plopping down on the chair. One generous look at the computer, truthfully, full of errors and weird small boxes with red question marks. 

"What did you do to that laptop?" Yeonjun laughed in amusement and Beomgyu just shruged, genuiely worried about his school documents. He sat down by the edge of the bed, his curious eyes darting between the boy on the chair and the laptop itself. 

Soon enough, Yeonjun would get to work, his fingers furiously clicking on the keyboard. Beomgyu eventually stood up, hovering awkwardly over the red haired boy, almost like if getting closer to the laptop would bring it some peace it clearly yearned. Yeonjun worked effortlessly, it looked like he actually had any idea about what he was doing, his lips slightly pursing in focus. The anxiety was cripping up Beomgyu's spine, just the idea of losing all his notes making him sweat.

"Hey, Beomgyu, hey," Yeonjun suddenly looked up at him. "Relax, I've got it. It's not as bad as it looks like." 

That reassurment was a tad calming, but just a tad. He was still looking at his own laptop screen like a wide-eyed cat, his hands twitching on his sides. "It's just, that project is... everything right now. I'm screwed if it goes down the drain."

"But it won't, really." Yeonjun smiled, his hand going up and stopping on Beomgyu's wrist, squizing it casually. "Trust me, I'll fix it." 

Yeonjun continued to work like that. It was hard to say how long they've been at it, but at some point, Yeonjun had left a sigh, something close to what a relief what sound like if it could make a noise.

"Hey, what's the password to your microsoft account? You need to put it in here." 

Beomgyu looked up, trying to reach the keyboard, minding that Yeonjun was in his way. The said Yeonjun could do various things - he could move to the side, stand up and give Beomgyu full access or put the password himself if Beomgyu spelled it out for him. Instead, his hands made their way to Beomgyu's waist, placing him on his lap with a firm yank. 

"Hey, what are you-"

"Nothing, it's just easier this way." 

Beomgyu was suddenly hyper aware of the his surrounding. The way Yeonjun's body felt against him, his warm skin, the way he sat on his lap, how Yeonjun's arms brushed against his sides every time he reached the keyboard. Also the way his butt was exactly on Yeonjun's croatch, but that observation was too filthy than Beomgyu would like to admit. He sat there frozen, trying to appear unfazed, shifting his mind anywhere else. Despite the damn casualness of it all, like everything Yeonjun yet done to him, it felt too intimidate. Too close. 

Thankfully for his sanity, the screen flashed with some light and the document appeared again, like nothing happened at all. Beomgyu left a sigh of relief, his academic life not yet down the drain. Yeonjun patted his thigh, though, giving it a playful squeeze. His gaze lingered on Beomgyu for a longer time this time, his eyes sparkling with something unknown. 

"Thank you, you really saved my ass here." Beomgyu spoke up first, not yet moving from that position.

"See, told you I'll do it. Just trust me a bit next time, huh?" 

That was a cue for Beomgyu to stand up, so he did, a little too fast to appear casual. Yeonjun gave him a knowing look and just like that, like that never even took place, left his room. Beomgyu stared at the doors for a long time, his pulse ringing in his ears, hands extremely clampy, face too hot that he'd like to admit to himself. 

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Yeonjun quickly blends into their lives. He's a part of whatever they're doing, which contains casual meet ups with either Soobin's or Beomgyu's friends. This time it's Taehyun, some alcohol loosening their tongues and sense of responsibility. The casual conversation quickly changes into Soobin emptying a bottle of bear and placing it on the rug they are all sitting on. Beomgyu doesn't pay much attention, his thoughts wandering somewhere betweeen the book he has to read due tomorrow and the presentation for his english classic literature class. 

Taehyun suddenly shakes him. "Truth or dare?"

"None, I'm not playing." Beomgyu replies casually. 

"None isn't an answer." Soobin urges him, smiling loosely. 

Beomgyu gives him an unimpressed look and mutter a quiet truth, hoping it was an easier way to quickly get over it. 

"Who in this room would you fuck?" Taehyun asks shamelessly. 

The room freezes for a second before all three of them, excluding Beomgyu, burst into laughter. 

"What? What is that question, Taehyun!"

"What, what? It's a pretty mild question, I think. I could've muster way worse." Taehyun shrugs, completely unaware of the fire bubbling up Beomgyu's chest.

Yeonjun, the absolute fucking menace he is, leans forward, giving Beomgyu a pointed look. He rests his chin on his finger, tapping it thoughtfully. "Right, Gyu. It's a mild question, I think you can answer easily?" 

"I can. I wouldn't fuck any of you." 

Yeonjun tsks loudly, chuckling under his breath. "A lie." He drags the words out of his mouth with a painful satisfaction.

"What the hell do you mean, lie? I wouldn't fuck any of you." Beomgyu repeated, his frustration picking up, voice a little too high to appear casual. "I don't want to fuck you, Yeonjun." 

"Didn't say you did, did i?" Yeonjun drags a smile on his face, slow and lazy, titling his face. 

Beomgyu hated him at that moment. He hated the sugestiveness of his tone, the way he poked holes through him with his glare, the way he tsked that damn tongue. The game continues, along with Yeonjun glancing at Beomgyu occasionally. Almost like he wanted him to know, so desperately, that what Beomgyu said wasn't neccesarily true. Soobin and Taehyun clock out rather fast, though, both going to the latter's room, probably falling asleep seconds after. Beomgyu wants to, no, he needs to leave immediately too. He stands up, going to the kitchen, meaning to just grab a bottle of water and exiting the shared space as fast as possible.

What also is fast is how Yeonjun appears, a little too close for Beomgyu's liking. He gives him a generous glare, up and down, smiling lazily. "See, back in that game, you could've just said my name. We both know that's what you were thinking off."

Beomgyu gapes at him, honestly really speechless for the very first time in his life. 

"Would've saved as some time, don't you think?" Yeonjun hummed thoughtfully, almost like he was discussing the most casual matter. 

Beomgyu gives him a wide-eyed look and puts the bottle of water on the counter with a loud thud. "You're so fucking full of yourself, what makes you think I'm that down for you?"

"Aren't you, though?" Yeonjun shrugs, taking a step closer. 

Beomgyu's instinct is to take a step back, but when he does, his back is pointing into the counter. Yeonjun is about one step away from cornering him against it and Beomgyu swallows his saliva with a gulp. Beomgyu hates him. He hates how Yeonjun knows perfectly what buttons to push, he hates that he's right and both of them know it. The moment Yeonjun seems to lean just an inch closer, Beomgyu's whole body yerk.

"Relax, it's not like I'll kiss you or something." Yeonjun chuckles, so unbothered. Then, he moves closer to Beomgyu's side, his breath so painfully on his ear. "Unless you want me to?"

Beomgyu shoves the shit out of Yeonjun, he stumbles a little back. His hands raise in mocked surrender. "Okay, fine, I get the message. I'll behave." 

Beomgyu internally takes a deep breath out, but it doesn't last long.

"For now, Gyu." He adds in a playful tone, winking slightly. 

Yeonjun leaves the kitchen, leaving Beomgyu's brain in a puddle. He drags a hand down his face, propping his back against the counter. He's screwed. He's fucked, thoroughly fucked too now. Because as much as Yeonjun makes his blood boil out of anger, there is something dangerous too. Something close to desire. 

The next morning, Beomgyu is making his coffee in a light speed, begging to not crush into Yeonjun. But he does. Of course he does, he gets to witness the sight of Yeonjun shirtless again, his pants way too low on his hips, moving groggily. He doesn't say anything, though, just mumbles quick morning that Beomgyu dodges with silence. Yeonjun goes with his own plans, stirring the kettle. Beomgyu thinks he's safe for a second, safe from that deep running feeling of neediness. 

"You're ignoring me." Yeonjun hums, almost involuntarily, as he puts a tea bag in a mug.

"No, I'm not." Beomgyu shrugs. "There's just nothing to talk about."

"You are, but okay."

Beomgyu exhales breath through his nose, clicking on the coffee machine with a little too much force. "Maybe I'm just too full of your shit."

"That's a shame." Yeonjun answers with a click of his tongue. 

They work around in that stillness, in that quiet that's uncomfortable enough to dig under Beomgyu's skin. It's like he wants to say something, he wants to speak up so bad, but he doesn't even know what he would say, if he were to do so. Yeonjun is so painfully casual, so nonchalant, that Beomgyu feels like he had lost a war before even taking the weapon up.

"You're just so easy to rile up, you know?" Yeonjun speaks up, still focused on his tea. "So reactive. I'd think you have a crush on me, If I didn't know any better."

"I do not have-"

"See? that's exactly what I mean." Yeonjun chuckles, forcing Beomgyu to look at him by standing way too close for him to ignore it. "The second I say anything, you're all heated up."

"That's because you're painfully annoying." Beomgyu manages to tell him, despite the way his whole face gets so warm. "You're fucking weird and cocky when in fact you shouldn't."

Yeonjun puts the mug on the counter. He makes his beeline to Beomgyu, his hand going up. Beomgyu traces the sight of it with his eyes until it lands on his chin. Yeonjun lifts his face gently, forcing him to look at him. "Just say a word, Beomgyu. Tell me to stop and I'll stop. Won't bother you ever again." 

Beomgyu wants to say something. 

His mouth opens, he's ready to cut Yeonjun like a knife with just his words. However, not a word leaves his mouth. Yeonjun's face break in a knowing smile, that one that makes Beomgyu so pathetic, and also so, so warm. He effortlessly flips them around, pressing Beomgyu down against the counter. Yeonjun leans even more, his hands twitching at Beomgyu's sides, not yet touching, just teasing the possibility of it. Then, they travel up, cupping Beomgyu's jaw, titling his head with that coy smile formed on his face. 

"See? For talking so much, cat seems to cut your tongue now." 

He presses closer and Beomgyu can sense the danger. Fuck, he repeats in his head like a mantra. He needs to do something. Shove him, slap him, anything. But his body doesn't seem to cooperate with his sober mind. Because deep down, or not even so deep down, he wants it. He enjoys the attention, even if he doesn't understand its origin. He likes the way Yeonjun clearly wants something to do with him, he likes how close they are, bodies pressing into one another with so much force, causing a friction so dangerous, so, so dangerous. 

"Yeah, you take care of it, huh? See you around later." Yeonjun suddenly tells, pressing into him one last time before making his way ouf of the room.

That's when Beomgyu notices the most pathetic bulge in his pants. He glares down at himself, feeling like his own body had just betrayed him. When he's back in his room, jerking off (the most pathetic jerking off in his life) all he can think about is Yeonjun. His broad shoulders, the way he pressed against him back in the kitchen, his damned loopsided smile, the way his hands seems to just fit on Beomgyu's waist. 

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The moment Beomgyu opens the doors to their apartment, it's like the whole world is pressing down on him. With a choked exhale of air, he starts crying, his hands covering his face. College was tough sometimes. Especially when you pulled an all-nighter to finish an essay, put your whole soul into it, and the professor rewards you with a feedback about how shitty the work is, about how you're not even worthy of being in their class.

In moments like that, Beomgyu would just cry his soul out for a while, put on a sad movie to cry even more and go take a nap. The plans come crushing when Yeonjun appears in the hallway with an unreadable expression. Beomgyu doesn't even flinch, too damn tired with the whole way to put on with whatever Yeonjun had in plan for him today.

To his own surprise, Yeonjun come closer, an unsure hand hovering over his shoulders. 

"Hey, what happened?" For the first time ever, he sounds concerned. Involved emotionally, at the very least.

Beomgyu just shakes his head, the bag falling from his shoulders with a loud thud. By that point, the previously hovering hand of Yeonjun's lands on his back, rubbing it in a soothing motion. "Hey, talk to me, Gyu. What's going on?"

"The professor, he, fuck, he-" Beomgyu stuttered, gasping for air. "I worked so hard on this essay and he told me, he told me- I really worked so hard."

Yeonjun's brows furrow in confusion, but also some sort of understanding. Beomgyu feels exposed. Raw. His hand continues its motion, patiently waiting for Beomgyu to calm down a little bit more so they could actually talk. It took a long while for Beomgyu's voice to gain enough strength to actually repeat the professor's words.

"He told me the essay was bad and I'm not worthy of being in his class. That i'm not cutting for the standard and it was a pain for him to read it." Beomgyu confessed, the words making him wince. 

"What a fucking dick." Yeonjun hissed, sounding genuinely offended, almost like it should concern him at all. "Hey, don't take it too personally. You're talented and so hardworking. I've seen you cramp all night for tests before, you put in a lot of effort, yeah?"

"Fuck the effort if it's not paying off." Beomgyu wails, still crying. 

Then, he's being pulled into a hug. A really warm, gentle hug. His face finds it's place in Yeonjun's chest, making the material of his shirt wet instantly. It feels so foreign, to feel Yeonjun like that. Not dwelling on it too much, he lets himself be held.

"No, fuck him if he can't tell a student to make their work better without being a fucking dick." Yeonjun replies firmly, his hands covering Beomgyu whole. "You don't deserve to be bashed like that. And I'm sure it wasn't even that bad. He's just old and grumpy, like most of the professors in that damned school."

"But I really tried my best-"

"I know."

"So why was he like that?" Beomgyu asked, his voice so weak, so small.

"I don't know." Yeonjun replied honestly, not pulling away, not even by an inch. "What I know is that you didn't deserve it. You do belong in that class, in that course. If anyone is capable, it's you, okay?"

He says it in such a sweet tone. Beomgyu clings to him like a lifeline, like Yeonjun and his arms were the only things keeping him in one peace, keeping him from falling apart. He suddenly pulls away slightly, not yet breaking the hold, looking up at Yeonjun.

"Why are you suddenly like this? So nice?"

"Were I ever mean?" Yeonjun challenges him. And there it is, that usual cocky tone, lazy grin. 

Beomgyu shrugs, because he's not even sure. Yeonjun was insufferable, that he knew for sure. But was Yeonjun mean? Well, leaving him with a boner that he very much caused was evil, but Beomgyu believes he'd hate it even more if it was Yeonjun jerking him off. So maybe no, maybe he wasn't mean. Maybe it was just the fact that he was incredibly hard to depict, to read, to understand. Yeonjun laughs softly, ruffling Beomgyu's hair. 

"Let's make you some tea, alright? No need to be getting all sad and gloomy over an old prickle."

And just like that, they spend their evening together. Drink the tea, talk a little bit more; Beomgyu picking apart every tiny bit of that interaction from the class, Yeonjun attentively listening through it all, not cracking a single teasing remark or joke. Beomgyu finds himself thinking it could be really nice. Really nice if Yeonjun was like that the whole time, more clear about what he wants.

When Beomgyu lays in his bed that night, he knows there is someone whose presence he could really appreaciate. Hueningkai, his Hyuka, his best friend. Someone who understood him so deeply and thoroughly, without all that explanations. He shots him a quick message before falling asleep, and when the doors get knocked on the first thing in the morning, Beomgyu knows who he is opening them up for.

Hyuka welcomes him with a warm hug, all excited to see him after some long overdue. Well, like two weeks, but it was a long run in their relationship. They plopped down on the couch with coffee cooling down on the table next to them. The conversation flew around every little aspect of their lifes; Hyuka talked about how he did not manage to pass his driving exam again, Beomgyu tells him about a girl who cheated on her exam and got caught by the most strict teacher in the whole school. 

"And about, uhm, Yeonjun? How is it going?" Hyuka eventually asks, his voice dropping an octave. 

Beomgyu was updating Hueningkai about the whole what-the-fuck-is-wrong-with-yeonjun gate, but it's not like he has some good updates. Just more and more confusion.

"So, well, it's a lot" Beomgyu decides to start with. "The last thing I told you was that whole truth or dare thing, right?" Hyuka nods, eager. 

Beomgyu clicks his tongue and shakes his head in disbelief. "Right. The next morning we bumped into each other in the kitchen. He told me I'm ignoring him and somehow, in a spare of like three minutes, he was pressing down on me, against the counter."

Hyuka gasps. Loudly. "Wait, what the fuck? Was it like against your consent?"

"No. Man, I'm acting like some needy whore around him. He asked me, well, told me, that he will stop with whatever he's doing if I just say anything." Beomgyu continues with something bitter in his voice. "I didn't say a word."

"Well, not what I expected, but I won't judge you." Hyuka shruged, seemingly thinking that was the cliffhanger. "I mean, maybe he just wants to-"

"I got a boner while we were at it. He noticed, by the way." Beomgyu cut in, unapologetic. 

Hyuka's head whiplashed so fast that his spine could pretty much break at that force. "Oh, fuck, Beomgyu. Oh my fucking god. Holy shit, you're actually... insane." 

"It's not me being insane, it's my fucking stupid dick acting up when it shouldn't!" Literally acting up, Beomgyu realised as an afterthought. 

"Well. Give me a second." Hyuka exhaled, an expression on his face that screamed both amusement and absolute mortification. "I mean, if he is indeed just doing it because he likes messing with you, that must have been the most satisfying moment of his life. Good for him. So what, he sucked you off, right?"

"No, he told me to take care of it in that disgustingly sweet tone and left me, all tented up." Beomgyu shook his head in disbelief. At that, Hyuka couldn't help, but laugh.

"Jesus. I don't even know what to say." Hyuka replied, his eyes still wide. "That's like the weirdest friends with benefits I've ever heard in my life."

"There are no benefits, just pure suffering for me. And for my dick now, too." 

Hyuka suddenly pulls Beomgyu into a hug. It is not meant to be some grounding, emotional gesture, they're both now laughing, holding each other. In that moment, the doors to the living room open and Yeonjun is standing there, taking the sight in. His jaw tensing just sligthly, posture less cocky than usually. He didn't say a word, though. He made his beeline to the kitchen, rummaging through the fridge. His posture seemed stiff, almost annoyed. Beomgyu followed him with his gaze, genuinely puzzled.

Yeonjun had walked in there as laid-back as always, but now it was like his whole body was tense. Beomgyu and Hyuka exchanged a confused look, but neither of them spoke up. Yeonjun eventually finally found the thing he was seemingly looking for and like that, he left. 

"Okay, that was weird, indeed." Hyuka exhaled, rubbing his temples. "Jesus, he'd drive me crazy in like two days."

Beomgyu puffs a laugh at that, their conversation gradually shifting to a different topic.

When Hyuka leaves, Beomgyu is looking out for a peaceful evening. Nothing can be peaceful with Yeonjun, though. When their eyes lock, back in the living room again, it's even more tense. Yeonjun clears his throat, looking visibly annoyed, displeased.

"So, was that your boyfriend?" 

Beomgyu's mouth fall agape.

"What? No, that's- oh my god, no." He stutters, a little too pathetic at wanting Yeonjun to believe. "That was Hyuka, my best friend."

"You looked really cozy, though." Yeonjun pointed out, his words laced with something Beomgyu couldn't quite grasp. "You're sure you're not hiding something from me?"

Yeonjun moves toward Beomgyu, casually sitting on the armrest of the couch. They stand face to face now, Beomgyu's brows furrowed in confusion, missunderstanding. 

"What? Who do you think you are?" Beomgyu answers him, his voice tight. "It's not like we're anything at all. I don't have to hide anything from you."

"Maybe." Yeonjun shrugs, leaning a little, his posture now relaxing slightly. "But I can see your hands shaking, it's like you really want me to believe that it was nothing."

Beomgyu look down on his hands, and they are in fact, trembling just slightly. Then, he moves his eyes up again, landing straight on Yeonjun's face, and fuck, he's standing up. In couple really short seconds, Yeonjun is standing next to Beomgyu, so close, so close their noses are almost bumping. Beomgyu's hands twitch helplessly, because god, he feels so helpless. He wants Yeonjun to finally grab him and fuck him into the matress, or at the very least, tell him what the hell he wants from him. 

"You're really insufferable." Beomgyu manages to say, jaw tight. 

"And you're fucking miserable at coping with it." 

Beomgyu's eyes widen, lips parting, Yeonjun's words hitting him like a whiplash. The next things he knows is that Yeonjun is grabbing his jaw with a tight force and his lips come crushing at his. 

There is nothing tender about that kiss. Teeth crashing, heat escalating every painfully long second in the room. Beomgyu leaves out a strangled gasp and Yeonjun takes it as a desperation to lick into Beomgyu's mouth, savouring every tiny breath he's leaving straight into his mouth. Yeonjun kisses him like he's been waiting, like he's been knowing it would end exactly like this. Like he knew Beomgyu would give in. Beomgyu barely has time thinking about it all, their tongues touching in a needy manner, hot against one another. Yeonjun bites onto his lower lip, teasing - he swallows the tiny whine Beomgyu involuntarily leaves out. 

Beomgyu's brain is nothing but Yeonjun. Yeonjun. Yeonjun. Yeonjun. The way his lips feel on his, the way he grips his waist, how good it fucking feels. How it's even better from what he had imaginated it to be like. 

When they pull away, both slightly breathless, there's silence. Beomgyu partially expects Yeonjun to move away. To leave him hanging like the last time, but that's not what happens. Instead, with almost utmost care, his hands cup Beomgyu's jaw, tilting his head sligthly. He peppers tiny, wet kisses all over, lingering there. He sucks gently, almost like he's not sure if he wants to leave a sight of himself on Beomgyu's delicate, milky skin. Beomgyu's whole body jerks at that, his hands gripping Yeonjun's shoulders. He watch him, watch his still unreadable face expression, he feels his lips on his neck, flinching with each of the kisses. 

"To my room, Yeonjun, please." He whines, as pathetic as it can get. 

The moment the doors close behind them, Beomgyu is being pushed onto his own bed, back landing hard on the matress. Yeonjun is quick to follow, placing his legs between Beomgyu's waist. The heat seems to be even more suffocating here, and when they connect their lips again, Beomgyu finds himself whining into it shamelessly. Yeonjun's hands are all over Beomgyu's torso, until they land on his nipples, causing friction by rubbing the material. Beomgyu's eyes open, brows shoting up. He can't breathe, it's all to hot, Yeonjun's too hot, and he's not even saying anything. He only gives him a lazy grin, dropping his weight harder on Beomgyu's hardening cock. 

How is that possible that Yeonjun knows exactly what Beomgyu is thinking of, what he wants, what he needs - what he needs to get from Yeonjun so badly. 

"I've been waiting to have you like this, all to myself." Yeonjun breathes out, seemingly affected too. "All pliant, needy for me." 

"Yes, please, Yeonjun." 

"Please, what?" Yeonjun tsks his tongue again. "Please leave me alone? Please, I'm busy? That's usually what you say." 

Oh, Yeonjun's evil. 

"Please touch me, anywhere, anyhow, please" Beomgyu breathes out, hands roaming over Yeonjun's torso. 

"Oh, baby, that's already guaranteed." 

The next thing Beomgyu registers is how Yeonjun gently pulls him out of his t-shirt, shifting his attention to Beomgyu's lower part of his body. He tugs down on his sweats, living him only in his underwear. His cock is painfully hard at that point, and Yeonjun takes his sweet time in savouring the moment. 

"So cute like this" Yeonjun says, a smile growing on his face. 

Fully clothed, Yeonjun leans down, pressing a kiss to Beomgyu's member, still covered in undewear. Despite Beomgyu's groaning and asking, whining, for him to get into it, Yeonjun doesn't listen. He peppers kisses all over his thighs, licking onto his skin like a kitten. And then, without any verbal preparations, he tugs on the underwear, Beomgyu's cock falling hardly against his stomach. Yeonjun takes the sight in. 

"Don't look at me like that." Beomgyu mutters, already on his way to cover himself with his hands. Yeonjun smiles, fondly this time, prying his hands away.

"Why? You're so cute even your fucking dick is cute." Yeonjun comments, almost disbelieving the sight he's witnessing. 

He's a man of action, though, because he quickly wraps a steady hand around Beomgyu's length, dragging it up and down. He smears the drops of precum over it, Beomgyu hissing, already feeling too far gone as for how early they are into it.

"My hand or mouth?" Yeonjun asks while his full attention is still on Beomgyu's cock.

"Mouth? Please?" Beomgyu answers coyly, almost if not sure if Yeonjun will agree. However, all he does is nod. He doesn't get on with it immedately. 

But then, Yeonjun swallows him. 

The feeling of Yeonjun's warm mouth rips a choked off moan out of Beomgyu, hands hovering over Yeonjun's head. The red haired boy really took it as a champ, swallowing Beomgyu more than half way through his length. He hollows his cheeks instantly, it is all so much, Beomgyu can't help but gasp at that friction. His tongue swirls on the underside of his cock and he takes even more in, now the tip almost hitting Yeonjun's throat. He doesn't gag, even despite the tears that gather in his eyes. Eventually, he starts going up and down on Beomgyu's length. 

The moans, the tiny sounds he can't help but make, they all go straight to Yeonjun's own dick. Beomgyu grasp a handful of his red hair, just holding him, not even urging his moves by that. At that point, Yeonjun has sinked down completely, his nose bumping into Beomgyu's skin. As he pulls back, slowly, he locks his eyes with Beomgyu. He keeps the eye contact until it's only the tip again, sucking on it eagerly. 

"Please, don't stop, Yeonjun, oh my god" Beomgyu gasp out, bitting on his lips to quiet down. After all, Soobin is still very much asleep in the apartment. 

Yeonjun just laugh at his reaction, the vibration on Beomgyu's cock almost making him roll his eyes. He kitten licks his tip, still looking at Beomgyu with those dark, piercing eyes. Those eyes, that despite everything that's happening in that room, remain unreadable for Beomgyu. Yeonjun, even if on his knees, mouth stuffed full of Beomgyu's cock, still remains a mystery. 

He manages to pull Beomgyu undone in a short time. He is a whimpering mess under him, his words not making much of a sense. A mantra of Yeonjun's own name and beggings to god forbid, don't stop. When Beomgyu's incredibly close, his abdomen convulsing in the overwhelming pleasure, he locks his hands in Yeonjun's hair.

"Yeonjun, close, fuck, get off-" He tries, his body shuddering with every tiny swirl of Yeonjun's tongue. 

Beomgyu really doesn't want to come into Yeonjun's mouth, as much as it would probably be the most ectatic sight to witness. It was their first, maybe only time doing that. However, the red haired boy gives him a nod, holding onto his inner thighs, acknowledging Beomgyu's word, not carrying about them at all. 

So when Beomgyu comes undone with a long string of curses and Yeonjun's name moaned in a hoarse voice, it all lands inside of Yeonjun's eyes. He's riding him out through his orgasm, not pulling away until Beomgyu is completely sucked out of air, his body twitching with every tiny touch. Yeonjun swallows while keeping an eye contact with Beomgyu. 

"That was fucking crazy." Beomgyu manages to pant out, laying limply on the bed.

"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself." Yeonjun answers with a sloppy kiss to his cheek. 

Beomgyu, even in the hazy state of mind, can notice how obviously hard Yeonjun is. He wants to reach out, but the boy stops him, shaking his head in amusement. "You'll have your moments too, later. See you around, baby." 

The doors close shortly after him and Beomgyu, for yet another time because of Yeonjun, is left utterly speechless. 

⋆｡°✩

Avoiding Yeonjun like a plague seemed pretty drastic and it would still be an understatement. Beomgyu was terrified of running into Yeonjun, which was a pretty reasonable fear, considering they lived in the same apartment. He couldn't even begin to grasp the worry over looking in his eyes, both of them knowing that the line has been crossed. It was now beyond just Yeonjun being cocky and flirty, beyond Beomgyu being all flustered in his presence. 

Soobin is the first one to catch up on that uncanny silence, when he's scretched lazily on the couch, Yeonjun playing a game on their TV, lips spawned comfortably on the rug beneath. It was unusual for Beomgyu to not exit his room at all, not even to grab breakfast, not even to see if Soobin was alive. 

"Hey, did you run into Beomgyu today?" Soobin spoke up, poking Yeonjun's back with his toe. He turned his head slowly, a puzzled look on his face. "It's just, is he alive in there?"

"I don't know, go and check?" 

"But you didn't see him?" He urged, already standing up.

"I mean... Saw him at night, looked pretty alive to me." Yeonjun answered casually, like it wasn't borderline concerning.

"What do you mean, saw him at night? Wasn't he asleep?" Soobin raised an eyebrow, now looking down at Yeonjun.

"No, I mean that I was in his room last night. He's probably tired now, though, that's why he's not coming out of his sacred bedroom."

Soobin was confused to say at least, glaring at Yeonjun with furrowed eyebrows. He couldn't quite understand what Yeonjun meant by that, but he shruged. "Whatever, I'll go and check." 

He made his beeline to Beomgyu's room, knocking lightly. He was met with no answer, so he knocked louder, more urgent. It's not like he was deadly worried. Slightly concerned. Eventually, still not facing any sights of Beomgyu, he told him that he's opening the doors. When he did, he saw Beomgyu, a blanket up his chin, looking remotevely awake. Soobin sat down by the edge of the bed, frowning at Soobin.

"I'm okay, just sleepy" Beomgyu mumbled, tugging himself out of the blanket. 

"Are you, though? You seem quite, well, worked up? Did something happen? Yeonjun told me he was over at your room last night?" 

At that, Beomgyu's whole body bolted upward, sitting down with too much force. His eyes widened - what the fuck did Yeonjun tell Soobin? Would he actually tell him about their little encounter? 

"Ugh, no? What did Yeonjun tell you?" Beomgyu chuckled lightly, but the sound came out forced, strained.

"Nothing more, just that he was over at your room and you looked pretty alive, back then." Soobin answered him. "Why are you so worked up? I seriously do not understand you two. You keep whining like a bitch to me about how weird Yeonjun is, but then, he comes over to you at night?"

Beomgyu sighs at that comment. Soobin, annoying Soobin, is right again. Because Beomgyu is in fact whining like a bitch that Yeonjun is weird and annoying. He can't understand why his body is gravitating toward him, though. There is a need, lust and desire burning in his chest, unable to stop whatever they are at. Beomgyu knows he deserves better. He deserves someone that is sure about him, isn't just railing him up to get a reaction out of it. For some reason, really fucked up reason, Beomgyu's whole point of existence recently is waiting for Yeonjun.

He waits, like a well-behaved puppy. He's expecting Yeonjun's flirtings, limbs brushing against one another. Whenever Yeonjun enters the space, Beomgyu almost wishes that he'll put on a show, just for him. He wishes Yeonjun would take this further, would finally get him undone on his bed, fully. Beomgyu, whole-heartedly, enjoys the attention. He enjoys feeling wanted, even if he didn't understand the lenghts of it. 

"It's nothing, Soobin. We're just trying to get to know each other, you know? Since we live together and stuff." Beomgyu decides to go with, after a long stretch of silence. "Yeonjun isn't as annoying anymore, it's fine."

Soobin sighs, looking absolutely tired with that conversation. "Whatever, Beomgyu. It's not like it's concerning me, what's worrying me, though, is you being in your bed like that, all weird. If you need to talk, you know you can come to me. Or Hyuka." 

"I know, thank you. If there will be any issue to discuss, you'd be the first to know." Beomgyu smiles, nodding his head. 

Yeah, Beomgyu would rather die than admit that what's messing with his head is Yeonjun sucking him off and the whole experience being ungodly good. He rather stick to being all miserable in his bed.

When he finally leaves his room and sees Yeonjun, it's everything and nothing he anticipated. Yeonjun gives him a lazy wave of hand, smiling, leaning against the wall. "Slept well?"

Beomgyu swallows the gulp in his throat. "Yeah, uhm, yeah. Did you?" 

"Yeah, I kept thinking about you for the rest of the night." Yeonjun replies casually, so casually that it makes Beomgyu's ears ring. "That sight of you yesterday, though. Something to behold." 

Beomgyu truly doesn't know how to adress that. He doesn't like the way his face gets all warm, thinking about how Yeonjun was imagining Beomgyu whining on the bed, panting, getting sucked of by him. Yeonjun smiles and moves forward, giving Beomgyu a playful ruffle of hair. Don't dwell on it, Beomgyu thinks to himself. 

Beomgyu's whole world crush on him again the very next day, when he's at his college campus, looking at Yeonjun. The said guy is leaning against the wall, a girl next to him. She's smiling, grinning even, with Yeonjun casually towering over her. She starts saying something, Beomgyu can't hear it, but Yeonjun starts laughing softly, shaking his head. He's showing her something on his phone, still too close, both of them lost in laughter. Beomgyu stands there, watching them.

He has no right to feel jealous. Absolute no right to demand anything of Yeonjun. They are not in any form of relationship, not even close to one, but he can't help it. It's not like Beomgyu thought all of that meant something. All he had with Yeonjun, he didn't trick himself into believing it. But when he sees Yeonjun, co casual, so close to someone else, he feels like crying. He wants to be the only one that Yeonjun cares about, notices, be with. 

So when Yeonjun, later at home, welcomes Beomgyu with another flirty remark, his whole facade breaks. 

Beomgyu bolts into his direction, looking at him with so much anger written on his face. Yeonjun tilts his head in confusion, but doesn't say anything. Just glance at him like a curious cat, waiting for him to say anything. 

"I saw you, you know" Beomgyu begins, voice tight. "With that girl on the campus. You really have no shame, Yeonjun." 

Yeonjun blinks, a lazy smile slowly tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Oh? What about it?"

Beomgyu takes a step closer. It's the first time he's the one cornering Yeonjun, pushing him against the wall. His lips purse in anger, in hurt, in something that he doesn't fully accept himself to feel. 

"What do you mean, what about it? You suck me off one day and then you just march off to another person?" Beomgyu hisses, his hands twitching at his sides. "Seriously, Yeonjun. What is your fucking problem?"

"I do not have any problem." Yeonjun declares, laughing lightly. "Don't be like that, Beomgyu. We both know it's nothing serious." He shrugs. 

Beomgyu's hands move quicker than his mind. One second, he's just staring at Yeonjun, the other one, he's slapping the shit ouf of the red haired boy in front of him. The sound echoes through the room, shocking both of them almost equally. The sound lingers in the air, painful, mixing with the holy silence that eruptes in the place. Beomgyu's own breath hitches, surprised by himself. Yeonjun slowly put his hand on his stinging cheek, eyebrows shooting up. It's hard to say what his expression carries. It's not anger, but not quite shock too. He looks... amused. 

"You're really something else, Beomgyu" Yeonjun chuckles lightly, running a hand through his hair. "But also so cute. You don't like it, do you? When I don't give you my full attention." 

The words feel like dagger twisting in Beomgyu's chest. He wants to scream at Yeonjun, slap him another time, throw him against that wall and yells until his throat gets hoarse. Yeonjun leans toward Beomgyu, giving him a sly grin, resting his head on his shoulder. He shoves his hand away, though.

"Just for the record, Gyu" Yeonjun starts, his voice dropping lower. "That girl? Minjeong? She has a girlfriend. Totally not interested in me, even if I wanted to." 

Beomgyu's ears ring with the echo of his own pulse. 

"Plus, I think you've noticed that I don't bring people around anymore. I'm focused on you, Beomgyu. No one is a threat to you, okay?" Yeonjun says it almost like he wants to soothe Beomgyu with his voice.

And for some fucked up reason, it works, because Beomgyu's leaning toward Yeonjun, catching him in a fierce, teeth-crushing kiss. It's wet, obscene how their tongues touch one another, how Yeonjun's hands travel down Beomgyu's back, gripping his butt. It's pathetic how Beomgyu mewls into the kiss, how Yeonjun swallows the voices inside. With one firm move, he sits Beomgyu down on the counter, finding his place between his legs. His hands grab onto Yeonjun's hair with a burning force, like he can't get enough, like he can't get close enough. 

He strips Yeonjun out of his t-shirt, hungrily sucking on the skin of his jaw. Yeonjun groans, titling his head, letting the boy over him do whatever he wants. It's always a surprise with Yeonjun; he takes things as far as he wants to, and all Beomgyu can do is pray that he'll take them further with each time. So when Beomgyu is bend over the counter, Yeonjun holding his waist from behind while pounding into him, he's pretty much really satisfied.

He doesn't even care that Soobin could go back home any second, could walk on Beomgyu getting fucked by Yeonjun without any mercy or holdbacks. If anything, it makes him feel even a bigger of a rush, a bigger need for Yeonjun. The way he is gripping his waist, the pace, fast, unforgiving pace he's keeping, hitting Beomgyu all in right places. It all makes Beomgyu's brain a mindless puddle. His cheek is pressed against the cold counter, watching Yeonjun as best as he can in this potition. That slight purse of his lips, the furrowed brows, the little gasps and groans he's leaving. 

"You're taking me so well, princess" Yeonjun dares to say, breathless and Beomgyu shamelessly whine in an answer. 

The position feels suffocating, with the way the red haired boy rocks his hips against his butt, the cold counter glued to his chest. All he can do is take it like a good boy he wants to be for Yeonjun. His back arches helplessly, sensing the familiar feeling of his lower abdomen growing all hot and tight. Yeonjun is close too, he must be, judging on the way his thrusts turn sloppy, less intended. He still manages to hit Beomgyu's prostate with every single deep drag of his length inside of Beomgyu - it's like he knows his body so well, despite being welcomed for the first time. 

"Inside, Jun, inside, please" Beomgyu continues on babbling, gripping the edge of the furniture he's being fucked silly on. 

And who Yeonjun is to not deliver? However, he groans loudly and grips Beomgyu even tighter. "You're coming first, baby."

With the way Yeonjun speeds up, it is sure he means it. After couple pitiful, loud moans from Beomgyu, a babble full of Yeonjun's name and cute curses, Beomgyu comes, heavily, his whole body convulsing in pure bliss. This orgasm is uncomparable to what Yeonjun had managed to do with his mouth the other time. This one has Beomgyu's eyes rolling involuntarily to the back of his head, fingers twitching helplessly as he spills more and more under his own stomach. 

Yeonjun follows after him not long after, stuffing Beomgyu fully, not yet daring to pull out. For a couple seconds, the world stills and it's just their heavy gasps filling the air. Beomgyu feels like he wants to thank Yeonjun for that out of the world experience, but quickly realises he won't be thanking a guy for sex. 

When Yeonjun pulls out slowly, not wanting to overwhelm Beomgyu, the cum drips out of him, spilling down his thighs. He's clenching against his own will, still a little out of it. Yeonjun smiles and makes his way closer to Beomgyu's face, tugging a strand of his hair behind his ear.

"Cool?" Yeonjun asks, a lazy smile forming at the corner of his mouth. 

"You're really fucking weird" Beomgyu puffs, but this time it lacks the usual bite. "You just gave me the most amazing, toe-curling orgasm and you ask if it was cool?" 

"What do you want me to say?" Yeonjun laughs, but he understands it might not have been the most romantic approach. "You're incredible, Gyu. The most mind-blowing laid of my life, seriously." 

"Yeah, yeah, you probably say it to every person you've ever fucked." Beomgyu rolls his eyes at that, slowly pushing himself to a standing position. Well, sort of, he's still gripping the counter for his dear life. 

"I'm serious, though" Yeonjun shrugs, and Beomgyu stills for a second, because Yeonjun's expression grow more... almost more serious. 

He looks at Beomgyu differently, but still, Beomgyu can't place it. He doesn't understand what Yeonjun could be feeling right now. It isn't the same casuality, general amusement. It runs deeper. Much deeper.

"Well, for the account" Beomgyu clears his throat. "It was my best laid too. You managed to really turn me into a cockslut, because never have my mouth formed anything close to 'please come inside'". 

"Hope you don't get pregnant" Yeonjun chuckles, snacking Beomgyu's ass gently, playfully. At that, Beomgyu supposes Yeonjun will leave. It's not like aftercare exist in whatever the hell they are.

When Yeonjun asks if Beomgyu wants to shower with him, he's speechless, but his head nodds before his brain registers how to form an answer. It feels weirdly, well, weirdly intimidate. It feels like how it could've been if Yeonjun liked Beomgyu, really liked him. He helps him with washing his back, massage his scalp with utmost care, fuck, he even lotions his elbows when they come out of the tub. After they're done, Yeonjun gives him a genuine smile before disappearing into his own room. 

If Beomgyu dies young, he's sure Yeonjun will be the cause for his death.

⋆｡°✩

It was a weird feeling, having a your own fuckbuddy living with you, when in fact, you're supposed to not even like him that much. When Beomgyu sees Yeonjun, his brain gets all foggy, but when he sees Soobin, his brain whiplash. It's not like Soobin can't know. Honestly, he could've probably tell him right in that moment, when he was sitting on the couch next to him, but for some reason, he didn't want to. Maybe because he felt a little pathetic for letting Yeonjun in like that, for wanting him like that. That's why he keeps on putting this fasade on himself, still pretending to not like Yeonjun. And to be fair, it's not like Soobin is good at catching on cues like those. Or maybe, even more probably, he doesn't care.

When Hyuka comes over couple days later, he requests Beomgyu to open a window when he hears about how the story with Yeonjun is unraveling. The last thing time Huening got an update on that situation, it was just Beomgyu pathetically getting a boner in Yeonjun's presence. Now he's hearing a graphic describtions of Yeonjun stuffing his best friend full of his cock in various places of the apartment. 

"Gyu, but that's quite, I don't know" Huening sighs, running a hand down his face. "Don't you think it's getting too far? Did you at least establish that, whatever it is?"

"No, we didn't. What it is?"

"You want me to know on your behalf?" Hyuka gives him a look, smiling just sligthly. "I don't know, man, fuck buddies I guess. Or more like a friends with benefits type of thing. Does Yeonjun fuck with other people?"

"I don't know. He doesn't bring anyone over and he once told me that he's focused on me and he doesn't see other people" Beomgyu shruged, a little puzzled. "So like, exclusive fuck buddies?"

Hueningkai groans even louder. Beomgyu knows it's pathetic. He knows that he should have at least a bit of self-respect and establish that with Yeonjun. Actually lead a conversation about it and set the boundaries for it. 

"Do you want it to be fuck buddies, though? Like, do you like Yeonjun?" 

Beomgyu really doesn't want to dwell on this question. He doesn't want to ask himself that and worse, possibly come to a really unsettling realisation. He doesn't want to like him. He doesn't want to have a little pathetic crush on someone that clearly doesn't want anything remotevely close. Beomgyu tries to convince himself that he's satisfied with whatever they are currently on, but the more Hyuka's question lingers in the air, the more Beomgyu knows he's just lying to himself. 

Because fuck. Fuck. Would he want Yeonjun to bring him on dates, pepper him with bouquets of flowers and cheesy sticky notes? Yes. Does he want Yeonjun to kiss him like he means it? Fuck, yes. Does he want to feel wanted by Yeonjun outside of being attracted to his body? 

Yes. Really, really, pathetically so. 

"I can't like him." Beomgyu declares, shaking his head.

"I'm not asking about what you think you should feel, but what you feel, Beomgyu." Hueningkai gives his shoulder a tiny squeeze. "And if you do like him, I highly opose on you going further with that shitshow. Fucking him isn't going to make him like you, Gyu. No matter how good it feels, it won't change anything."

The silence is killing. It gets under Beomgyu's skin and twists inside, causing his whole body to itch achingly. 

"I'm not saying there isn't a possibility that Yeonjun likes you. I don't really know him outside of your stories. But if he does, and he still settles on just what he's doing now, I don't think that's worth your time." 

Beomgyu waves a dimissive hand at him, but it all gets to his head. Yeonjun is truly an enigma and Beomgyu doesn't feel strong enough to understand him. When he's sitting in class, bored as ever, listening to another of his professor's boring monologues about Dostoyevsky's art, his phone buzzes in his pocket. 

yeonjun [3:14 pm]; hey hey gyu, are you free today's evening? 

Beomgyu sighs, but the curiosity gets better of him. Yeonjun never really stirred conversations with him like that. 

beomgyu [3:15 pm]; i kind of want to say no just for the sake of it, but whats up? 

yeonjun [3:15 pm]; lol. brat -_-

i was just wondering cuz i wanted to see nosferatu today 

beomgyu [3:17 pm]; as in... the movie? that one about the vampire??? 

yeonjun [3:17 pm]; yes! that one :) do you want to come with me? 

Beomgyu's eyes widen and he feels the sweat creeping on his temple. He feels pathetic, really fucking pathetic. Yeonjun is just inviting him to watch a damn movie and his body is taking it as if he was about to propose. He starts dwelling on it. Is it casual? Is it some sort of a statement? A date? A way to fuel Yeonjun's potential exhibitionism kink and jerk him off at the theatre? He knows he should probably not go. Show Yeonjun that he won't be here for every single occasion, that Yeonjun needs to try harder. 

beomgyu [3:24 pm]; sure, we'll see each other at home, then. 

Yeah, right, Beomgyu never said he was a strong man. When they meet at their shared apartment, Yeonjun is all ready, two tickets in his hands. Did he buy them in advance? He gives Beomgyu a lazy smile, patting his shoulder. Beomgyu leans against the wall, watching as the red haired boy tied his shoes, humming something under his nose. The ride there wasn't too eventful. One of them occasionally said something and Beomgyu could quietly work himself up over the fact that Yeonjun was driving that stupid car effortlessly cool. Apart from Yeonjun's hand that made his way to Beomgyu's inner thigh, it was rather peaceful. 

"So, I didn't know you have a thing for vampires?" Beomgyu said quietly as they sat down in their seats. He was clutching the popcorn in his hands, sitting stiffly. 

"I might, yeah, I'll admit. However, you're still my favourite one to have a thing for." Yeonjun answers casually, scooting just a bit closer. No way in hell, he'll suck him off in that cinema, Beomgyu thinks in mortification. 

Yeonjun didn't suck him off, thankfuly. He didn't initiate any physical touch at all, apart from putting his hand on Beomgyu's thigh at some point. Beomgyu found himself being the one to gravitate toward Yeonjun, not quite touching, but scooting closer. It felt nice, surprisingly. Yeonjun turned out to be a really fun movie partner. He wasn't speaking too much, but he'd sometimes whisper his observations straight to Beomgyu's ear. Their energies matched in that apartment, Beomgyu wasn't a huge movie-yapper either. When they stepped out of the cinema, Yeonjun pointed at something with a soft gasp escaping his mouth. 

Beomgyu turned his head around and saw a tiny photo booth. 

"Gyuuuu, please!" Yeonjun yelled in excitement, already making his beeline here. Beomgyu didn't have it in himself to disagree. 

The photobooth was really tiny, though. They tried to figure out how to squize inside, until Beomgyu was effortlessly pulled on Yeonjun's thigh. That was way too close as for casual friendly outing. The first two photos were decent enough. Some thumbs up an V signs threw at the sight of the camera. Then, for no apparent reason at all, Yeonjun cupped Beomgyu's jaw and kissed him. It wasn't a playful peck, too. Yeonjun bit on Beomgyu's lower lip, opening him up slightly, just enough to lick onto his mouth more freely. They kept making out long after the photos were already printed out, waiting for them to pick them up. 

When they pulled away, Yeonjun just took the photos in hand, smiling lopsidedly at them. The bottom one was indeed showing them in the middle of the kiss, if you squinted enough, you could actually see Yeonjun's tongue pushing his way inside Beomgyu's mouth. Seeing it like that, imprinted, made Beomgyu's ears flood with blood instantly. 

"Oh, that's so cute, isn't it?" Yeonjun said casually, handing Beomgyu the copy. Then, just like that, he slid his own inprint inside his clear phone case. 

"Are you going to just carry it around on display like that?" Beomgyu asked, his voice a little strained. 

"Why not? I think they're really cute. Plus, I'll be scaring off the hoes." Yeonjun shrugged, and Beomgyu couldn't help himself, but laugh at the ridiculousness of that statement. 

"But what if anyone sees? What if Soobin sees?"

At that, Yeonjun looks at him with a frown on his face. Almost like if it was the most unserious question ever. 

"So what if Soobin sees? Is he your boyfriend?" Yeonjun laughed, looking at Beomgyu with a confused frown. "It's not like we're cheating on anyone, right? And it's not like it's a crime to kiss."

Beomgyu scratches the back of his head, exhaling the air through his nose. They were still in that damn booth, the air felt suffocating and he was perched on Yeonjun's thighs. 

"Well, it would just be a little hard to explain" Beomgyu clears his throat, feigning nonchalance. However, his whole head is spinning, it's like Yeonjun carries some toxins with him, making him all weak and dizzy. 

"You don't have to explain anything, you don't owe it to anyone." Yeonjun replies casually, but his voice now carries a hint of seriousness. 

"I know I don't have to, but Soobin's my friend, you know? It's not exactly nice trying to act normal around you and him on top of that. I don't like this whole sneaking around thing."

"Well, no one is forcing you to do so." Yeonjun cuts in, his voice firm. "You can go and tell Soobin that we fuck sometimes. No harm done to me." 

The way Yeonjun had put it in words, so casually, like it was really only dismissed to having some occasional sex, made Beomgyu's chest sting. It wasn't sadness, not really, but maybe there was a hint of disappointment. Maybe he'd really like for Yeonjun to claim him, to make him his, for it to make any sense. Beomgyu, despite his feelings, nodds his head and stands up from his lap. They make their way to the car, Beomgyu still holding that imprint of their pictures. The drive home is peaceful again and when the doors open, Soobin greets them in the hallway.

"Jesus, where were you!? I called like twenty times" Soobin sighed, shaking his head. "Beomgyu, do you sometimes use your phone or is it purely for the aesthetic?"

Beomgyu now realises that Yeonjun made him so busy that he didn't even glance at his phone. Not even once. 

"Oh, shit, sorry. We were at the cinema." 

"You two? Like together?" Soobin repeated, raising an eyebrow. At that, Beomgyu groaned, moving to untie his shoes. Yeonjun, however, looked unbothered, as fucking always.

"Why are you so surprised?" Yeonjun asked him, yanking his jacket on the rack. 

"Well, because Beomgyu says he doesn't like you." Soobin shrugs, but at the very same moment, Beomgyu kicks his feet. "Okay, okay, he just thinks you're a little weird." 

Beomgyu feels the heat building up again. Why was Soobin like that? Was everyone just plain damn stupid? "Ouch, Beomgyu, really?" Yeonjun tsks his tongue, but it's so obvious that it's all just pure amusement. 

Beomgyu groans even louder and bolts straight into his room. Soobin gives Yeonjun a confused look. For a good moment, the only sound in the apartment is the thud of Beomgyu's doors being yanked closed. Soobin wants to ask, for a split second, he really almost forms the sentence in his head. Somewhere close to "what the fuck is going on with you two", but it dies on his tongue pretty quickly. It's not like Yeonjun or Beomgyu were anyhow into sharing what was happening.

"Want to eat something?" Soobin decides to ask, making his way to the kitchen. 

And well, life could drag itself like that. Yeonjun would give Beomgyu a flirty comment, guaranteeing himself his dick sucked later, and it was nice. It is also nice, when Beomgyu is grinding down on Yeonjun's thigh in the living room, gasping into his mouth while he's gently grabbing his hair. Yeonjun's hands travel onto Beomgyu's chest, flicking his nipple between his fingers, almost abstinently. He's probably just about to pull away, place his warm hand on Beomgyu's crotch and continue, when-

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

Beomgyu's entire body goes still. Yeonjun freezes, his stupid hand still on Beomgyu's nipple. The air shifts, get suffocating so quickly, almost like if someone put the heater up by a million celsiuses in a second. They both turn their hands in unison, painfully slowly, like they were scared to fully grasp what they knew was happening. 

Soobin stands by the doorway, eyes wide, mouth agape in absolute disbelief. He looks between them, takes the situation in; Beomgyu's sitting on Yeonjun's thigh, one leg at either side, Yeonjun's hand hovering over Beomgyu's chest, their lips red and raw. No one dares to even breathe now, all Beomgyu can do is plop down next to Yeonjun, making the whole position less pathetic. 

"Soobin, you're home early" Yeonjun dares to speak up, his voice a little too aroused.

"I live here." Soobin snaps, too quickly. "And I can come home whenever I fucking want. What is this? Like genuinely, what the fuck is this?" He points vaguely at them, almost gasping. 

Beomgyu knew, deep down, that Soobin would react like this. It didn't come out of jealousy, or anything close to that. Soobin was protective of Beomgyu ever since they became friends. He was always wary of his lovers, potential partners, always repeating for Beomgyu to keep his head up and never settle for less than he deserved. That's why he's angry. He's angry, because as much as it didn't bother him that Yeonjun fucked half of the campus, it started bothering him the very moment Beomgyu got caught in that too. 

"Listen, Soobin, it is not as intense as you probably-" Beomgyu chokes out, eyes wide, scared.

Soobin’s expression twists instantly. He looks at Beomgyu with a knowing look in his eyes. Obviously, he knew. He knew Beomgyu wasn't anyone special in Yeonjun's eyes, just another person to mess with until there's someone better in sight. 

"Beomgyu, are you out of your fucking mind?" Soobin asks him, almost spitting the words out. "What did I tell you? What did I fucking tell you? Do you really only think through your dick?" 

That stings, making Beomgyu physically flinch. He wants the earth to swallow him whole, just make him forget everything, that encounter, fucking every single encounter with Yeonjun. "Relax, Soobin. No one's dead." Yeonjun's voice suddenly echoes through the room. He shrugs nonchalantly, looking at Soobin, unimpressed.

Beomgyu panics internally. Just a glance at Soobin's murderous stare and he knows that Yeonjun said the worst thing possible. "Hey, hey, listen, Soobin, it just happened. I don't even like Yeonjun, really, it's nothing-"

Yeonjun tuts his tongue, letting out an amused chuckle. 

"Ouch, Beomgyu. That's a little harsh, don't you think?" He comments casually, leaning back against the backrest of the couch. Soobin let out a shaken breath, dragging a hand down his face. Beomgyu, however, whips his head around, about to physically hurt him.

"Shut the fuck up, please." 

Yeonjun smiles at him. 

And Soobin? Soobin looks like he's about to combust the very given second, pacing in little circles. "Please tell me it was a one time thing. Please, Beomgyu, please tell me that you are just horny today and it fucking happened." He's rubbing his temples as he's saying this, then clapping his hands together in a praying manner. 

Beomgyu wishes he could soothe Soobin and tell him that yes, it was the first and last time. But how could he even drag that lie out of his throat, when in reality, it was so much more than that? The silence is enough to make Soobin curse under his breath. Beomgyu swallows loudly, his throat bubbling. He can't stay here. He can't stay in that suffocating room, he can't bear looking at Soobin, he can't stand the way Yeonjun's lips curve into that lopsided smile. 

He stands up, making his way out of the room, no, running out of the room. The last thing he hears before collapsing onto his bed are the sounds of a heated conversation between Soobin and Yeonjun. He could only register glimpses of their words, something about Yeonjun being disgusting or about Soobin sticking his nose up in someone else's business. 

The silence that follows the next couple days feels deafening. 

It's safe to say that Beomgyu had mastered his abilities to ignore both of his flatmates. He practically stopped going out of his room at all, the only excuse being when he had to leave for classes or pee in the bathroom. Other than that, Soobin and Yeonjun wouldn't even know if Beomgyu was home. The boy had managed to run away from their sight perfectly, even listening to their footsteps in the hallway to estimate if they were going into their respective rooms or maybe into a shared space like kitchen or the living room. 

Beomgyu doesn't even know why he's doing all that. He's trying to tell himself it's not shame, because he has nothing to feel shameful about. He's trying to force his mind into believing that it's not guilt, because he was just having fun with Yeonjun, he totally does not like him and isn't experiencing a weird heartbreak over someone only wanting him for having sex with. 

But he does feel like shit, so when Hueningkai barges the doors open to his room, he knows he's up to nothing good. 

The said boy sits down by the edge of the bed, sighing loudly. Gives Beomgyu one generous look and shakes his head with a tired expression. 

"What's that about?" 

Beomgyu doesn't know the answer. "Soobin called you?"

"Yeah, he did, because he's fucking worried about you, you brat." He replies without skipping a beat. "I understand it might've felt humiliating to get walked on, but what you're doing is quite dramatic." 

Beomgyu huffs, closing his posture even more. It's not about getting walked on. If getting caught in the middle of a makeout session was the biggest struggle of his now, he'd be living a pretty comfortable life. 

"It's not about that." Beomgyu says quietly. "I don't know what this is about. I don't want to talk with Soobin and Yeonjun. Especially Yeonjun."

"Well, fuck Yeonjun, but Soobin is your friend. Our friend. Do you want to tell me what has happened? From your perspective? I want to hear both sides." Hueningkai asks him, his voice warm and inviting. 

That's why Beomgyu always liked Hyuka best. "Soobin got really mad because he found out that me and Yeonjun have been hooking up. Said I only think through my dick and he warned me, stuff like that. But it was Yeonjun who made it all so unnecessary weird, because he totally missed Soobin's point. You know, that lazy fucking grin, he even laughed like he only found it endearing." 

Hueningkai nods along, his expression unreadable. Beomgyu sees that he's not judging him, but it still feels humiliating admitting that all that drama is caused by him getting stuffed with dick. Totally avoidable, if he had self-respect, he could think. 

"Well, I get Soobin." Hyuka shrugs. "But I also think that if you didn't drag that silence for so long, it could've been already sorted out. With Soobin, I mean, because Yeonjun is fucking weird." 

"So what should I do?" Beomgyu decides to ask. "I mean, not with Soobin. I'm not too worried about him, he's too soft to actually not forgive me. I mean what should I do with Yeonjun."

"I'd say you should throw him away from that house and go fully non-contact, but you're not going to do that anyways." The boy laughed, shaking his head in disbelief. 

"Well, but theoretically speaking- let's say I do like him and would kind of want him to be my boyfriend, do you think It's possible?"

Beomgyu regrets those words the moment they leave him, because Hyuka musters the most disgusted face he has ever seen. His mouth fall agape, almost like he couldn't believe what his ears just witnessed. "Are you fucking kidding me?"

He didn't. It was true, even if it was hard to swallow. He liked Yeonjun's attention, he liked how Yeonjun kissed him, almost like he had meant it, how he could also be warm and nice if he tried hard enough. Maybe it was silly (for sure it was), but Beomgyu wanted Yeonjun to want him. 

"Beomgyu, I need you to go on like a really long walk and think about yourself. Like a walk up to Daegu and back, no social media, just you and your brain." Hueningkai said in half-mocked seriousness. "No, fuck that, I need to get you an excorcist." 

Beomgyu in fact did not get an exorcism appointment from Hueningkai. However, he restrained from stupid moves and decided to make up with Soobin. The said boy gave him a warm smile like the whole situation never ever happened. The plan to ignore Yeonjun was going strong and after some time (a couple days), Beomgyu felt more in power. Obviously he still hoped that Yeonjun would reach out, get on his knees and say that he needs Beomgyu to breathe, but when it didn't happen, the disappointment was bearable. 

He felt so strong that he even went back to spending his time in the living room. 

Beomgyu's top one biggest mistake. 

When the doors fell open, Beomgyu's eyes wandered onto Yeonjun. Very, very angry Yeonjun. He closed the wood behind him with a precise gentleness, making his way to him. Beomgyu sat frozen in place, not actually understanding what was happening until he could literally feel Yeonjun's breath on his face. 

"You think you can just go like that?" Yeonjun's voice was dangerous. 

Beomgyu made an examen in his head quickly, but nothing seemed to match the level of Yeonjun's anger. The said Yeonjun crouched down in front of him, his gaze furious, eyes flinging with something raw, the pupils dilated just slightly too much for Beomgyu's liking. He gulped loudly, trying to make any sense of the situation - Yeonjun's scent was intoxicating, his cologne almost ringing in his ears, if it was even possible. He leaned further into the couch's backrest, like he could shrink down into the cushions and run away from that situation.

"I don't under-"

"Oh, for sure you don't." Yeonjun laughed bitterly. "I saw you today. You and that guy in the cafeteria? The way you were leaning onto his shoulder? All those comments under his posts? Your little pathetic crush?" 

Beomgyu's mouth fall open. Yeonjun had a point. Him and the said guy, Jeongin, recently got closer. They've started sharing more classes, so naturally they fell into each other more. Beomgyu felt comfortable in his presence, the conversation floated easily and it was a nice friendship to share. But fuck, did he involuntarily make Yeonjun... jealous? 

"So what?" Beomgyu decided to test his luck. "You think we're exclusive?"

Yeonjun gets closer. Dangerously close. His fingers grasp Beomgyu's throat, lightly, but just enough to make a statement. With one move, Yeonjun is basically sitting on his lap, between Beomgyu's legs, his knee poking into his crotch - probably not even on purpose. Beomgyu's breath hitch, he suddenly feels a little too aware of how close Yeonjun is. 

"No, I know we are. I also know that a pathetic boy from the art course won't take my place." Yeonjun says seriously. "You think he can fuck you like a can?"

Beomgyu's eyes widen almost comically. "Do you think it's about fucking? Do you think you even have a place in my life?"

Yeonjun stills, his hands suddenly much looser on Beomgyu's throat. Beomgyu decides to continue. "Do you think I only like you because you fuck good? You can't, no, you won't be doing this anymore. Pull me close, then away, mess with me, then disappear when it suits you. I can't take it anymore."

Beomgyu can't tell what gave him the strength to say it out loud, in those circumstances. He wasn't even planning on pouring his heart out like that, while Yeonjun's knee was still very in his crotch, when it was probably leading to another meaningless sex. But he did, he said it, and in that very moment, he felt so, so much lighter. 

"You act like you want me, but you never do anything about it. You don't want to talk, don't want to show what you're really feeling, if you're even feeling anything more than a desire." He says, voice steady. "If you want me, like I want you, then claim me. Do it right now, show me you want it too."

Yeonjun's expression softens just for a second. His eyes are dark, exposing him - the frustration, the vulnerability. It hits him like a wave how Yeonjun, for the first time ever, looks like any words made it through his ears. He leans in even more, his voice steady. 

"You want me to claim you, huh? Fine, Beomgyu. You've got me. All of me. And you have been having it for a long time." 

Before Beomgyu can even think of a way to respond, their mouths meet in a crashing force, leaving him breathless. It's nothing gentle - the kiss is raw, desperate, filled with hunger that Beomgyu had not really felt ever before. Yeonjun sinks him further into the backrest, caging him with his hands. And then, Beomgyu is being lifted into his arms. 

Yeonjun carry him to his room with an utmost care, like Beomgyu was a delicate something in his hands. Even the way he drops him onto the bed, which was probably supposed to be all hot and dominant, turns gentle. Yeonjun slams the doors shut behind him and fall onto Beomgyu, messing with his shirt while kissing him again. It feels different this time. Beomgyu doesn't get to dwell on it, though, because the moment Yeonjun's fingers make contact with his nipple, he let out a pathetic little sound. He sighs into Yeonjun's mouth, his hands roaming freely all over him. Yeonjun's hair, his jaw, his broad shoulders. 

"I want you so bad, Beomgyu, you don't understand." Yeonjun breathes out, nibbling Beomgyu's ear. 

"Then have me - fuck - you can have me, Jun." 

Yeonjun doesn't need to be told twice. In a short time, he's opening Beomgyu up, his back arched, laying helplessly on Yeonjun's lap. In that moment, Yeonjun thinks that he could stay like this forever - Beomgyu whining in his lap with his fingers inside him, grinding down on them in a desperate attempt to come. By the third finger Beomgyu feels ready for him, so Yeonjun flips him on his back effortlessly. Hovering over him with a smile, he takes a look at Beomgyu's throbbing length, begging to be touched at that point. 

"How do you want me?" Yeonjun asks him, grasping his waist. 

"Can I ride you?" 

That question seems to throw Yeonjun off guard - Beomgyu has been nothing but an absolute pillow princess, laying on his back and looking cute. However, Yeonjun never swore to be a strong man. He props his back against the wall and pat his thigh as an invitation. Beomgyu smiles, biting his lower lip. His hands are steady on Yeonjun's shoulders as he positions himself, and then, slowly, so painfully slowly - he starts sinking down. 

They both groan loudly when Beomgyu finally sits down, Yeonjun's dick fully swallowed. Beomgyu gasps, Yeonjun suddenly feeling so much bigger, splitting him in half without even moving yet. Yeonjun doesn't rush Beomgyu, he gives him time to adjust to that intrusion. His hands roam over Beomgyu's body, almost caressing him, giving him that tiny, comforting friction.

"Okay, gonna move now" Beomgyu declares, panting slightly.

That's the only warning Yeonjun gets before Beomgyu starts pushing himself up, his grip on Yeonjun's shoulders growing more firm. Yeonjun leaves a pathetic moan, clearly not expecting him to be this good. Beomgyu takes him all like a champ, sinking all the way down, his face so beautiful; mouth open, eyes half-lidded, brows furrowed slightly. 

"Fuck, you're so tight, Gyu - oh my god" Yeonjun groans, his grip on Beomgyu's waist tightening. He helps him with lifting himself, his thumbs rubbing over his nips. 

Their breaths mix into one, the atmosphere in the room spiking without any mercy. Yeonjun feels like he's losing his stupid mind, all he can think is about Beomgyu - how tight he feels, how he sinks down on his cock like that, how dedicated he is to making him feel good. How Beomgyu's own cock brushes against Yeonjun's abdomen with each thrust, smearing the precum all over it. At some point he starts sucking on Beomgyu's delicate skin on his neck, pulling away with loud, nasty pops. He bruises almost instantly, but when Beomgyu moans, so sweetly, Yeonjun continues. 

Beomgyu's pace turns sloppy, it's visible that his thighs are slowly giving up, aching. Yeonjun grips him tighter, stilling him. Beomgyu groans, sligthly annoyed by the loss of friction. "Let me help you, alright?" 

Yeonjun flips them around, still buried deep inside Beomgyu, laying back first on the bed. Then, he pulls out, only the tip in, just to thrust back in Beomgyu. Hardly. Beomgyu moans, the sound so obscene, but it goes straight to Yeonjun's cock. He's caging him with his arms, looking down at him with that look. Something almost close to a genuine affection. Beomgyu watches as Yeonjun's necklace swing right in front of his face with each of his trusts, how there's sweat running down his torso. Yeonjun hits on Beomgyu's prostate with every one of his moves, it being so measured, like he knew Beomgyu's body for years. 

"You're so perfect, Gyu." Yeonjun suddenly says. He steadies himself on one hand, the other one cupping Beomgyu's cheek. "So cute. So beautiful. So lovable. You're so, so sweet." 

Beomgyu doesn't know how Yeonjun can say that, buried six inches inside him, but he takes all those words, locking them inside his heart. He whines in an answer, their eyes locking. 

"I want you, Yeonjun - fuck - please, I want you to want me too." Beomgyu cries out, but then his eyes roll back with a particularly intense thrust from Yeonjun. It's like he did it on purpose. 

"I want you, I want you, Gyu, I wanted you for so-so long." 

Beomgyu's eyes widened again that night. "I wanted you for so long, Beomgyu. I was so, ugh, scared - scared that I like you, like that. But I like you so much, I want you to be mine, for you to only look at, at me."

It feels so fucking ironic that Yeonjun throws his heart out like that, buried inside Beomgyu, still sloppily thrusting into him. And Beomgyu doesn't know if the revelation that Yeonjun likes him was what did it for him, but he's coming, all over his stomach. Yeonjun fucks him through his high, then stills too, pulling out to add to the mess on Beomgyu's stomach. 

Silence.

Long, deafening silence.

"I meant what I said. It wasn't just dirty talk." 

"Can we please have this conversation after I clean the cum off my stomach?" Beomgyu deadpans, pointing vaguely at the very (now) disgusting sight. 

Yeonjun can't help but laugh when he grabs a wet tissue box and cleans Beomgyu without complaining. Then, he's nice enough to pull a blanket over him, himself putting some sweats that were laying on the ground. He plops down on the bed, next to Beomgyu who was already sitting up. 

"So, what I was trying to say is that I really like you. And I kind of didn't know how to handle it, so I messed with you. I mean, I wasn't doing it on purpose. I thought that it would be enough, because it was enough with anyone else." He shrugs, his gaze avoidant. "With every other person I felt satisfied after just fucking them. But with you, it was like I needed more. It came to a point where the most exciting part of our sex was kissing. It felt intimidate." 

Beomgyu opens his mouth. Then closes it. Opens it again. He truly is left speechless. It felt like a fever dream, Yeonjun admiting everything Beomgyu could only pray would be true. 

"And it's not like I wanted to be such a dick. For some time I thought that you liked it that way too. But at some point I noticed that you liked me too. And then that whole situation with Soobin happened - and all I saw in your eyes was guilt and humiliation." Yeonjun continued, his voice cracking slightly. "And I realised I've been hurting you so much. When all I fucking had to do was just be honest with my feelings for the first time ever." 

"It's not like you've been hurting me all along." Beomgyu answers him, his voice steady. "I was enjoying it. For some time it was exciting for me too. I liked that pull and push, not knowing what you'd be up to next. It stopped being fun after I started having feelings for you. I think it went south the moment you comforted me after I got scolded by my professor. Because I got a glimpse of what you could've been and it broke me. But since all I could settle for was sex, I stuck to it."

Yeonjun doesn't even register the moment the tears fall. What he registers is Beomgyu's hands on his cheeks, smoothing him gently. Beomgyu bops their noses, nuzzling them together like they were a pair of bunnies. Then, he kisses Yeonjun softly. Just a peck on his lips, but it's enough to make his ears red. Yeonjun looks up at Beomgyu with red eyes, tears still spilling out. 

"You don't have to cry, you know?" 

"I- I don't know, I just-" Yeonjun fumbles with his words helplessly. " Do you still want me? Like that? After everything?"

"I think so. You're going to have to show me that you mean it, though." Beomgyu smiled. 

Yeonjun smiled back, rubbing his eyes aggressively. 

⋆｡°✩

The next weeks pass in bliss. Beomgyu feels like someone took him to a different world, a place located higher than all heavens above - a place where Yeonjun picks him up after classes, texts him through the day, makes him tea when his stomach aches. A place where Yeonjun cherishes their kisses the most and has the right to do so. 

One evening, Yeonjun comes home and makes his way straight to Beomgyu's room. With a gentle knock, he opens them and appears inside - holding a bouquet of beautiful lilies. His cheeks are already tinted pink, like he got embarrassed without even saying anything. Beomgyu looks at him expectantly, a sheepish smile forming on his face. So when Yeonjun sucks a deep breath in and whispers the words - the words do you want to be my boyfriend, Beomgyu can't help but smile so wide that his gummies are showing. 

"I'd have to think about it." Beomgyu hums, but his grin is betraying him. 

"Please don't tease me right now, I'm about to piss myself." Yeonjun deadpans. That's when Beomgyu notices his hands are trembling slightly, the lillies swaying back and forth. 

"Of course, Jun, of course." Beomgyu smiles and makes his way to kiss him. 

The biggest challenge they have yet to face is Soobin. Soobin isn't stupid - alright, oblivious at times, but not completely dense. He quite hoped that the thing would resolve itself differently. He hoped that Beomgyu could seek for his sense that went away because of Yeonjun, tell him off, Yeonjun would get mad, move out and their lifes would come back to normal. But obvio-fucking-usly, no. Instead of the slight angst to peace he's been anticipating, they are back on good terms, meeting in their rooms at night, giggling and laughing. And yes, fucking. 

Soobin tried to stay quiet, only because Hueningkai told him to. He quite respected his judgement, so when he told him that "Beomgyu is gonna have to learn it the hard way, it seems", he tried to let it go. He tried to wait, but Soobin was kind of designed to never let his mouth shut. 

"Okay, but what is actually going on? Answers, now." He finally demands one evening, taking the sight of Beomgyu and Yeonjun spawned out on the couch, looking a little too comfortable for his liking. 

"No, please don't do it in front of me!" Hueningkai wails - because yes, Soobin had the nerve to bring it up when he was over too. 

Beomgyu looks between them, then looks at Yeonjun who gives him a motivating nod. 

"Listen, so. That is a funny situation, really." Beomgyu laughs awkwardly, but Soobin doesn't seem like he wants to laugh. "Me and Yeonjun, we're kind of, you know, dating." 

"Absolutely not."

"But we are!"

"But I refuse!" Soobin whines, his voice high-pitched. "What do you mean, dating? What happened to Yeonjun being a dick and all that?"

"Well, Yeonjun isn't a dick anymore, that's what happened." Beomgyu says, shrugging. Yeonjun, this time, stays eerily quiet. "Hyuka, tell Soobin that it's not that bad." 

Hueningkai gives him a glance, forcing a polite smile on his face. "Well, ugh, you see. Not the greatest news of my life, but-"

"Right! Not mine too, indeed!" Soobin doesn't even let him finish. "This is the worst day of my life, oh my god, what do I even do? Do I drink it down? Do I take a long walk? I need to call Taehyun instantly. "

"Listen, Soobin," Yeonjun suddenly says. "I know it's going to be a long way to gain your trust, but I'm serious about Beomgyu. I won't sugarcoat it, I was a fucking dick, a huge one, right, but I'm trying. And unless you give me a chance, I won't be able to show you that it's not about any of that mess anymore." 

Soobin looks at him, his mouth suddenly surprisingly shut. Hueningkai exhales his breath with a loud sigh. Beomgyu takes the sight in, and slowly, really slowly, he realises - everything is going to be okay. 

⋆｡°✩

So when a couple months later, all five of them are laying down on the beach, Beomgyu feels assured that it in fact turned out to be okay. With Yeonjun hugging him from behind, picking sand from his damp hair, Taehyun and Hueningkai splashing one another with water, Soobin laying down, bathing in sun, Beomgyu smiles to himself. 

"What got you so giggly?" Yeonjun asks teasingly. He leans into Beomgyu, kissing the back of his neck softly. "Your skin is getting red, did you use sun protection?"

"I thought you're going to protect me from the sun, though." 

"Well, I can't fight the sun."

"A good boyfriend would." Soobin chimes in, flopping onto his stomach. "Speaking of the sun protection, Yeonjun, would you mind applying some onto my back?"

"What am I, a saint? A peasant?" Yeonjun puffs, but in a second, his palms are smearing the cream on his back. "All set, now the sun can't have a thing on you." 

When Soobin is all pampered for another round of his sunbathing, Beomgyu is being pulled into the sea. Yeonjun keeps him close, swaying him in the water like he weighted nothing. Taehyun and Hyuka instantly join them, splashing some water, all four of them erupting in laughter. Yeonjun smiles fondly, pulling Beomgyu for a hug. Then, he lifts his head with his index finger, giving him a look. A look so full of love. 

"My cute damp cat."

"You're so fucking annoying, jesus." Beomgyu shakes his head, but then kisses Yeonjun softly. "But I love you, even if it's sometimes really hard to put up with your shit."

"What shit? I just complimented you!" 

Beomgyu mumbles something in answer and splashes a personal wave of water straight onto his face. But when he looks over at Soobin, who is sitting up, taking a photo of the four of them while smiling so proudly, he knows that he's in the right place, with the right people.