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Himawari had noticed a few years ago that Doumeki always carried something in his pocket. More than once, from afar, she saw him staring at the object with a thoughtful expression.
It looked like an egg, although she had never seen it up close, since every time she got close, he put the thing back in his pocket.
If it were anyone else, she would think it was some kind of lucky charm, but she knew Doumeki well enough to know that he wouldn't need something like that. She decided to leave it aside. After all, if he wanted to talk to her about it, he would. But that day, when she visited him at university, her curiosity got the better of her and she asked.
Doumeki seemed to hesitate for a second, but he ended up deciding to talk. Just as he was one of the few people who could see the truth behind her smiles, she was one of the few people who could recognize the emotions that must be going on behind his stoic face. And he told her what the egg was, who had given it to him, and what its purpose was.
Himawari stared at him for a long time, too incredulous to be able to express herself. After almost a minute the shock was still too great but she knew she had to speak.
“Why didn’t you use it?”
“...”
“You have to tell me Doumeki because I really don’t understand. I know that because of the things with his parents and his other self, Watanuki has to stay in only one dimension, one world. But without her memory he could choose this world, without her I have no doubt he would leave the store behind. He could be here with us, living and growing and being happy.”
“I can’t do that.”
“Why not?”
Once again he hesitated, this time Himawari waited until he found the words.
“Because it’s his life, because it’s his memories and I can’t choose something like that for him. If I were in his shoes I would never choose to have the memories of the most important person to me erased, even if forgetting brought me happiness, especially if the person doing it had selfish reasons as their main motivation.”
“Love is not a selfish motive, Doumeki.”
“It is when the other person doesn’t love you back.”
Himawari took a deep breath, the disbelief fading away to be replaced by simple and familiar sadness.
“Don’t worry Kunogi. I’ll take care of him” Doumeki said, placing his hands over hers.
“I know you will, but who will take care of you?”
To that Doumeki had no answer.