Chapter Text
“Good luck out there Dogman!”
The model flinched, then turned around, fixing Petey with a sad pout.
“Don’t you mean goodbye?”
Petey laughed, more confused than amused. It was startled out of him from Greg’s sharp movements more than anything.
“Goodbye? What’re you talking about-”
“I know it was you, Petey.”
Dogman stood from his vanity, walking to the cat with a solem grace unbefitting the pop music and fanfare going on just outside his dressing room. The makeup artists shuffled off, sensing the tense atmosphere.
“I know it was you, and it breaks my heart.”
Petey tried to look away from Dogmans piercing gaze, but the brutal way he stared- Like he didn’t need an answer. Like he’d already come to terms with what he’d done.
“Dogman…Greg… I’m-”
He looked into those sad, brown eyes and felt his resolve crumble.
“I’m sorry…”
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-2 years earlier-
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“Knight, get your perfect butt in here RIGHT NOW!”
Greg whined and looked up at his owner's worried face. It was never a good sign when Clarence yelled like that.
Knight quickly chucked his mocha latte into the trash and shoved himself away from his cluttered vanity. Greg licked the droplets that flew onto the floor at the messy toss before following after his anxious friend.
“Sorry Chief! I know I wasn’t supposed to play with the props but one of them was a really, REALLY big sword and I just-”
“Shut the door!”
Clarence glared at Knight from across his fancy black desk as he stumbled into his office. The model almost tripped on Greg and half fell over before doubling back and slamming the door shut, rattling the whole office and making the Chief of Marketing and Management cringe.
“Lightly! Close the door, LIGHTLY, Knight! I can’t afford a repeat of last week! Glass doors aren’t cheap!”
Knight hunched his shoulders and nodded. Greg whined and plopped his chin on the Chiefs lap, giving him his best puppy dog eyes. He felt so bad for his friend when his strength got him in trouble. He couldn't help how easily those doors shattered. Knight's new personal trainer had been getting on his butt about skipping arm day and he’d just overcompensated!
Clarence looked to start a new tirade but faltered when he caught sight of the dog on his legs.
“Oh- Greg… Hey, you know that’s not fair!”
Greg just whined. He didn’t want Knight to be in trouble.
Knight seemed to feel bad enough for his most recent slip up that he jumped in to spare his boss anymore torment. “Hey buddy! It’s okay, I just have to be more careful, that’s all.”
Knight straightened up in his seat, smiled his award winning grin and laughed. “If it weren’t for the Chief here I’d probably be in REAL trouble with corporate, right Clarence?”
Greg perked up at his owner's cheery smile and trotted over to him for pets.
Chief sighed and nodded. “Yes, actually, Knight. That’s what I was calling you in here for in the FIRST place…”
Knight scratched behind Gregs ears and frowned. “I’m not like… getting fired or anything… right?”
“What!?”
Chief threw his head back and actually cackled. Knight let out a relieved chuckle.
“Okayyyy so… What then?”
Greg tilted his head and frowned. He tried to think of something detrimental enough to get Knight in trouble with Chief but not fired. There was… a concerning amount of material for that list. Greg looked up at his friend and sighed.
He loved Knight, but they were in this office often enough to break doors for a reason. Arthur Knight was strong, he was kind and he was very, very attractive, but he had absolutely NO brains. Which was fine! For a model of high end menswear and athletic sports brands. But even for a model, Knight was…
“-stupid! You weren’t even supposed to be on that set! They are getting ready for filming and you ruined their entire set up for- what? A game of pretend where you and poor Greg act like fools and BREAK very delicate, very EXPENSIVE prop swords?!”
Knight ducked his head and looked at Greg guiltily. Greg whined and nuzzled into his leg for support.
“I knowwwwwww, but I said I was sorry! I asked if It was cool to hold them and the prop girls said it was, so I just thought-”
“And that! That RIGHT THERE, is all I need to hear to know you’re lying to me!” Clarence slammed his hand into his desk, rattling his name plate and mothers picture enough to make Greg yelp in surprise.
“But-”
“BUT NOTHI’N! You didn’t think! You NEVER think! And every time you turn your brain off and mess around on a job, I-” Chief paused.
Knight’s lip trembled and Greg cowered, squeezing his large blond head into Knight's lap and whining pathetically.
Chief sighed and slumped back into his chair. “This can’t go on, Knight… Our company can’t keep shelling out dough every time you want to goof off!”
Knight nodded, petting Gregs head nervously and biting his lip to keep from trying to explain anything else about the swords incident.
“Greg lost a job, did you know that?”
Knight's hand froze mid pet and he gasped.
“What!?”
Chief scoffed and crossed his arms ‘Don’t “What!?” me, you know you’re a package deal, Knight! They hear about you wrecking a set? Why would they want your tornado butt messing up their dog food commercial too?”
“But- But I would NEVER-! Greg is the most smartest, best behaved-”
“Yeah, well!” Chief threw his hands out and gestured to Knight in frustration. “You sure aren’t, kid!”
Greg whined and Chief frowned, turning to the dog sympathetically.
“Greg, I know he’s your friend but this is important. He needs to understand that his actions affect others. Besides, your reputation is on the line too!”
Chief waved to the far wall where dozens of posters were framed. Posters of their modeling agencies best and brightest, respectively. Posters of Knight in Hermes sports wear, of Greg posing for PetsRUs toys and even one of the both of them on the cover of Life Magazine. The most beautiful friendship in Ohkay City.
“You two are my best! The most handsome man in Ohkay City and the most adorable dog. I got my promotion because of you guys!”
Knight flushed in embarrassment at the title while Greg wagged his tail softly. He did do a good job, after all.
Chief gazed at the posters longingly for a moment before turning back to the two.
“But just because you guys are good, doesn't mean you can act thoughtlessly! It’s selfish, is what it is!”
Knight and Greg slumped in unison. Selfish was just about the worst thing a person OR dog could be!
“This is just like the pool party shoot, or the monkeys at the zoo for its grand opening or, or- jeez! Knight, I can’t even name each time you’ve let your recklessness put your job in jeopardy. My job. Greg’s job!”
Chief pushed himself out of his chair, rounded his desk, kneeled down and gently tucking Gregs head into his arms.“This puppy is too precious to be cleaning up after a grown man! He begs for forgiveness for you, keeps you on schedule, heck! I saw him taking calls for you last week!”
Knight flushed in shame. He felt awful.
Greg whimpered and tried to comfort him, but Chief tugged Greg back into his arms and huffed. “No, Greg! He needs to hear this.”
Chief freed one arm and grabbed the Knight's shoulder tightly.
“Knight, you need to seriously consider why you're doing this job. If you want to do something else-”
Knight opened his mouth but was quickly silenced with another squeeze to his shoulder.
“If you do, I will help you. You can do other things, that’s not what I’m worried about.”
Chief finally released Greg and Knight and sat back on his desk, leveling the both of them with his most serious stare.
“I’m worried that, if you keep acting like some party-crashing rock star at every job I send you to, you’re going to run your reputation straight into the ground, and you’re gonna drag Greg right down with you.”
*Gulp*
Greg looked at his owner's face as he began to pale.
Oh no.
“You know as well as I do that he’ll follow you anywhere and that includes the gutter. Things weren’t so great for you guys before you made a name for yourselves. You remember I was basically paying your rent for a year when you got started!”
Knight was frozen. Greg nudged his leg, but it barely budged.
“I just don’t want you two to go through that again. If this is all some cry for help, or something, I can help you transfer to another field , but until you get a steady job Greg’s work is-”
“Okay!”
Chief startled as Knight clapped his hands and stood. Greg flinched at the sound.
“These are- really, really good points, Chief. I’ll just say now, I don’t want to quit, okay? I just-”
Knight’s eyes flickered to Greg and his smile returned full force.
“I’ve been kind of bored doing sportswear recently! I wanna try a new sector and I just didn’t know how to tell you! Or, like, ask. You know?”
Chief gaped for a moment, then sighed. “Seriously? All this because you wanna try, like, business casual menswear?”
Knight nodded, posing and flexing an arm. “Well I know I’m built like an athlete but you can only wear so many sweatpants before you start going crazy!”
Greg barked in agreement. Knight started in formal wear because of his handsome face but was quickly moved to sportswear when his physique started to improve with their new income. The before times had been rough on both of them, but they both looked much better now that they had jobs and three meals a day.
Chief heaved one more sigh for good measure before revealing a tired smile.
“Okay then! If that’s where you want our agents to focus, I’ll let them know. Just, try to behave until we can get you a label? It probably won’t take long, so be patient. Please.”
Knight nodded, smiling his awarding winning smile once more before quickly pushing the glass door aside and speed walking back to his dressing room. Greg gave Chief one polite farewell bark that was returned with a nod before following after his friend.
As Greg made his way to the dressing room he let out a soft whine and sigh. That was probably the worst talking to yet. Chief almost never talked about the previous times anymore. They were too sad, in Greg's opinion, to revisit. Just hungry and cold and tired, all the time.
Greg barked as he pushed through the doggy door (personally installed by Knight for their dressing room) and ran to the couch where his owner was sprawled out like a Victorian maiden. Knight groaned as Greg jumped onto his belly and made himself comfortable.
“Greg! You’re not little anymore… Ugh, my gutsssss…”
Greg barked and licked Knight's face, playfully mocking his death throes, but stopped when he tasted tears. Knight started playing with his ears as Greg whined and nuzzled his face.
“I’m sorry, buddy… I know I’ve been screwing up a lot… I don’t mean it in a bad way, promise…”
Greg whined louder and rested all his weight on the body below him, hoping against hope to snuff out the sadness with his love.
“It’s just not fair! You’re a dog, you shouldn't have to work… we never get to have fun, just exercise, eat healthy, go to meetings, have a salad, dress up in boring clothes…” Knight sniffed and hugged Greg to his chest as tightly as he could without hurting his best friend.
“I told you I would get us a better life, ‘member? We would play all day and have a house and I’d get married. Kids, so you could be a big brother?”
Greg barked softly and nodded. Their dream. White picket fence, pretty lady for Knight, babies for Greg and a warm fireplace. They could afford the stuff now, but the people…
“My girlfriend says I should get a serious job, you know? Like, she said I could do something important. I just don’ know what’s more important than, just… you know? We have it good, but she wants more… I just don’t know…”
Greg sighed and let Knight caress and scratch and fiddle with his fur. It helped them both calm down, but Greg felt his heart clench painfully at his friend's sober words. Greg didn’t know what else there was either.
“I promise I won’t make you work even more, Greg. We already have a house, so maybe if I start modeling something fancier, Alice will be happier? I don’t know, I just don’t… I don’t think she gets it.”
Knight loosened his hold and took a congested breath past tears.
“I don’t think I can do anything else, Greg. I don’t know how to do anything… I can’t even read good…”
Greg howled and licked his friend's face. That wasn’t true, he just had dyslexia! He learned how to read all by himself too. He’d even taught Greg! Greg attacked his friend face until he finally let out a shaky laugh.
“Okay, so not bad, but not great either. I still get my letters backwards, buddy.”
Greg barked in indignation. Knight was being unfair!
Knight wiped his wet face and sighed. “Well, the point is we both need this job, but Greg…”
Knight smiled then, cupping his dog's face in his hands and pressing their noses together. “You’re my best friend Greg. If you want to quit, or you think there's something else you wanna do, I want you to do it.”
Greg lightly licked Knights mouth and smiled when his friend laughed. “I’m serious! You are the best boy in Ohkay city! You deserve whatever you want!”
Great barked and wagged his tail happily at the praise. He loved his friend so much! So, so much!
Greg adjusted himself to better press himself to Knights side on the couch and barked.
“I just want to be with you!”
Knight laughed, and that was all Greg needed to hear.
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Petey scowled as his agent stared him down.
They had been having this staring contest for over 7 minutes and Petey refused to lose.
Eventually, Scum groaned and rubbed his eyes in exasperation.
“Haw haw!” Petey gloated and leaned back in his chair triumphantly.
“Haw nuthin’! You’re doing the magazine and that’s final!”
Petey frowned and crossed his arms. “Says who?”
Scum mirrored Petey and narrowed his eyes. “Says me!”
Petey leaned forward and narrowed his eyes, reading for another staring contest.
“Wait a minute!” Scum leaned back and threw his hands up.
“We are NOT doing this again! Either you do the job, or you can kick rocks, kid!”
“But what about those other jobs? Suits and ties! Or that pet store label?”
Petey slammed his hands into Scum's brown desk and glared. “I can do better than some catalog for an off brand label like Levins!”
Scum rolled his eyes. “NO, you can’t! They said no, remember?”
Petery was cut off before he retorted with a finger to his face.
“Those two got you beat, Petey. Knight and his dog! They’re best sellers! Hot as nuclear blow out and everyone wants a bite! No way can you compete!”
Petey felt his rage start boiling over at the mention of those two. Every classy mens modeling job was grabbed up by that idiot and his stupid muscles. And every job for a cute and lovable pet was swiped away by his ugly dog!
“But I thought I was the Numbah 1# cat model in Ohkay city?!”
Scum shrugged. “Best of the least sought after isn’t anything to write home about, kid. Sorry, but…”
His agent tossed a magazine onto his lap.
On the cover was Knight and his dog, posing with a large truck. They looked like the American dream. Plastered across the top was the title.
Man's best friend.
“Those two are what the people want. Not cats.”
Petery shredded the magazine with his claws and stormed out of his agents office.
“They want the perfect pair? Oh, I’ll give them a perfect pair!”
He kicked over an office plant as he stomped his way out of the agency building.
“Perfect pair of LOSERS!”