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2025-05-01
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2025-09-18
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Dead Boy Shenanigans [and those of Living Girls]

Summary:

a series of incorrect quotes originally posted on my tumblr [@falling-star-cygnus]

Some of these have already been turned into fics by yours truly, some are being written as this is posted, but please! enjoy the sneak peeks and original plans and memes >w•

Notes:

this was my first DBD post hehe

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Eugh... Feelings

Chapter Text

Crystal: Do you ever wanna talk about your emotions, Charles?

Charles: …No.

Edwin: I do

Crystal: I know, Edwin

Edwin: I’m sad

Charles: I know, Edwin

will forever find it funny that Charles is the most emotionally closed off out of all of them [surrounded by two pricklebugs and yet HE’S the sunshine protector]

Chapter 2: Hand in Hand, the Blueprint

Summary:

this was what sparked my fic Hand in Hand >W•
-> loosely based on my own dissociative episodes, and what I wish people would do for me

Notes:

wrote this before i saw the last two episodes of the show, then wrote the fic when i finished

Chapter Text

[a little after the events of the Devlin House, but before the lighthouse] [Charles had been in front of the two, helping Edwin find cats, but slowly he'd begun to lag.. until...]
Crystal: Hey, Charles, what was it you-
[she blinks, and makes her way over to the ghostie]
Crystal: Charles?
[Edwin looks over, confused, and then jolts in surprise. He's at their side in an instant, careful to keep his movements unabrupt]
Crystal, waving a hand in front his eyes: Are you g- hey!?
Edwin, lowering her hand by the wrist: That- won't help.
Crystal: Well, is he okay? What's going on?
Edwin: ...He will be. This just.. happens sometimes, for the both of us. It is best to let it run its course.
[Crystal opens her mouth to protest- or something, but thinks of the general... state of the two. And concedes]
Crystal, reaching for Charles again- albeit hesitantly: So- okay, you have got to stop grabbing me
[Again, Edwin lowers her hand. He rolls his eyes]
Edwin: Then stop reaching for him. Charles will be fine.
[It almost sounds like he's trying to convince himself, his words sharp, but his hand is gentle as he takes his best friend's]
Edwin, quietly: Charles.. how far are you?
[He carefully squeezes his hand, trying to gauge how deep Charles had zoned out]
Edwin: Can you hear me? Charles?
Charles, the haze clearing just slightly: Mate..?
Edwin, swallowing: Okay. Alright then, come on. Let's go for a walk

Chapter 3: Scary Dog Privileges

Summary:

this one does NOT have a fic, but it IS in the works

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Edwin might have Scary Dog Privileges but i think Charles would genuinely be crushed if he found out he was the scary dog
-> it's also kinda funny that this dynamic switches once you get to know the two

[the four of them are chilling in the office, because Niko is alive and im not open to criticisms actually, thank you]

[ Charles had just shooed off a particularly nasty client- a nasty nasty client that resulted in the agency closing early. Or least going on break]

[ Edwin is on the couch, reading, while the other three are sitting on the floor playing cards]

Crystal, tossing a blue 3 into a steadily growing pile: You know, it's so nice not having to deal with people like that anymore

Charles, taking his turn: People like what?

Crystal: You know- assholes like that guy. Who think they can be rude to service workers just because they're 'paying'

[Niko nods emphatically as she debates on the best card, while Edwin doesn't even look away from his book]

Edwin, briefly reaching down to squeeze his partner's shoulder: I can tell you that Charles has never once let that kind of abhorrent behavior slide, especially not in this office. You needn't worry

Niko, finally laying down a yellow three: That true, it's like having our own scary dog.. but instead of robbers, he scares off rude people. And spirits

[ Crystal snickers, her fingers primed to set down a yellow skip]

Crystal: And Night Nurses.

Charles, with the face of a people pleaser obviously about to crack: ...you guys think I'm scary?

[Everybody freezes- Edwin on the couch, Crystal with her skip, and Niko with remaining two cards]

[ Edwin finally looks up from his book to glare incredulously at Crystal from over Charles ' head. Crystal quickly chooses a new card]

Crystal, shaking her head: ...no- No no, no no no.. it's a- it's a joke!

[The game is quickly abandoned in favor of Niko and Crystal scooting closer on opposite sides of Charles - the latter holding her phone out with one of those 'reasons i feel safe walking alone' videos open and playing]

[ Edwin leans over Charles ' head to watch too, his hand laying almost protectively on the other boy's shoulder]

Notes:

i'm not exactly sure how to format these, but the block of text only works when I can color code i fear

Chapter 4: And HUP, there we go

Summary:

i firmly believe Edwin can throw Charles over his shoulder when he needs to- he's just horrifically bad at attempting to hurt him

Notes:

these also might get turned into comics, if i can swing it

Chapter Text

[In a situation, where they need to GO before Death shows up]

[ Charles is in front of Edwin , arguing loudly with the ghost they helped because they were rude and Charles doesn’t like it when people are rude to Edwin ]

Edwin, tugging on his shoulder: Charles, while i appreciate your dedication to my protecting my character, we need to get going. Death will be here soon

[ Charles still looks upset, but he relents and lets Edwin start to usher him away]

The Ghost, under their breath: Yeah, listen to your bitch. Fucking animal

[He immediately turns back around]

[His other half goes on autopilot with a flurry of movement and panic]

Edwin, looping his arm through Charles’: No- no no no, we need to get going remember?

Charles: But he- what are you- hey!?

[ Edwin levers his friend over his shoulder and holds his legs- briskly walking the other direction]

[ Charles is too stunned to kick up a fuss]

Charles, after a few seconds of silence: …how is it you can’t throw a punch but you can do this? Were you holding out on me?

Edwin, sarcastically: yes, Charles, that’s exactly what I was doing

Chapter 5: British People /derogatory

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Crystal: I hate british people.

Charles: ...what??

Crystal: Not you. [kicks down office door]

Crystal @ Edwin: YOU

Notes:

I love that Crystal like- actually has a vendetta against british people but also SPECIFICALLY against Edwin
"Charles, be less british. Edwin... be less Edwin."

Chapter 6: Disturbance

Summary:

when Dead Boy Detectives gets a second season, i want the Night Nurse to be deeply unsettled by Charles
-> like- i think she'd have a soft spot for him, absolutely

Notes:

but also he beat her into the belly of a murderous fish and then completely 180'd on their next interaction

Chapter Text

[ Charles is sitting cross-legged against the couch in their office, with a new cricket bat on his lap and one of Edwin's books open next to him]

[The Night Nurse materializes with a swish of fabric and looks around]

Charles, glancing up and grinning: Charlie! What're you doing here?

Night Nurse, sighing: I believe I have told you innumerous times by now not to call me that. What are you doing?

Charles: Well, my last bat kind of got splintered fighting Esther's giant lass eating snake so-

Night Nurse: -in five words or less?

Charles, holding it up: Enchanting. A. New. Bat.

[He looks at his fingers]

Charles: ...Charlie.

Night Nurse: I said or less! Oh, never mind, where's your other half? I was under the assumption you two were joined at the hip. . . .

Charles, tilting his head: He's out.

Night Nurse, taking a deep breath: Out where?

Charles: Just out. Why're you asking?

[The Night Nurse holds up a file with an incredulous flourish, a perfectly arched brow.]

Charles, getting to his feet with a grin: New case then, is it? Brills, I'll take it to him

Night Nurse: Now wait just a moment- [

He's out through the mirror, file in hand, before she can voice a full protest]

Charles: Cheers, Charlie!

. . .

Night Nurse, straightening out her attire: I am a trans-dimensional being with a lifetime that spans eons. And yet, that boy..

. . .

[She clears her throat. Turns on her heel]

Night Nurse: ..disturbs me.

 

Chapter 7: Tonal Differences

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Crystal @ Edwin: bitch /aggressive

Charles @ Edwin: bitch /affectionate

Notes:

brought to you by Charles' goofy lil grin whenever Edwin is being particularly smarmy

Chapter 8: Edwin's Actually Strong as Fuck

Summary:

Edwin is actually physically strong as fuck. like- yeah, Charles is the brawn but just like how he's a great detective without his partner- Edwin's not a slouch either

Notes:

i want to see Edwin dip Charles actually so bad

Chapter Text

[They're still in Port Townsend , but things are.. relatively chill? It's before the forest, before Monty's confession, so really the group is just walking around being silly]

[Well- mostly silly. Edwin and Crystal are being bitchy at each other, and Monty is watching in thinly veiled concern in front of Niko and Charles ]

Monty: Uhm.. sorry, are they- always like this?

Charles, tiredly: Since the moment they met. I think it's their own, weird form of affection really.

Monty, almost entranced like one might be with a train wreck: ...got it.

Niko: I really hope they don't start slapping at each other like last time.. [

Monty chokes, and Charles cringes]

Edwin: Did you get dressed in the dark this morning or were your warmer, garish clothes just too heavy to life out of the recesses of your wardrobe?

Crystal, actively fighting shivers: Edwin, you couldn't lift yourself out a wet paper bag! Don't give me your bitchy eyebrows-

Monty: Is that true?

Charles: The bag thing, or the bitchy eyebrows?

[The two look at each other, then back at Charles ]

Monty: ...the bag thing-

Niko: His eyebrows are very expressive.

[ Charles ducks his head on a laugh, nodding in agreement with Niko's statement before turning to Monty and glancing at Edwin ]

Charles, still smiling: Edwin's right strong, he's just.. really bad at using it against other people

Niko: Is he stronger than you?

Charles: Oi- I wouldn't be the brawn if that were the case, now would I?

Monty, raising an eyebrow: ...the brawn?

Charles: ...why is everybody saying it like that?

[ Niko pats his shoulder sympathetically. Monty feels a sharp pang of guilt for some reason, as if he'd kicked a poor dog]

Monty, clearing his throat awkwardly: Is he really that strong? I mean- no offense, but you both kinda look like a strong breeze could knock you over..

[ Charles ignores the 'both' part and grins- full of boyish mischief]

Charles: Just watch, yeah?

[He carefully maneuvers past the two, gently clapping the crow on the shoulder as he goes, until he's walking backwards by Edwin's side]

[After a second or two, Charles simply rocks back on his heels and lets himself tip backwards. Edwin doesn't even look before catching his collar and hauling him back to his feet with ease]

[And a little too much force, maybe, because Charles has a little hop in his rebalanced step]

Edwin, exasperatedly fond: Charles, please, one of these days I'm not going to be able to catch you in time

Charles, unabashedly fond: Haven't let me fall yet though, have you?

[ Edwin rolls his eyes, and squeezes Charles ' shoulder, smiling briefly before returning to his 'conversation' with Crystal ]

Monty, blatantly staring: ....are you sure they're not dating?

Niko, blinking: At first I was... but now? Now I don't know.

Chapter 9: A Trickle of Ebony- the Blueprint

Summary:

this is the groundwork for my fic A Trickle of Ebony- which has more Charles n Niko bonding over earrings!!!

Notes:

takes place a little before the two assholes show up.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Niko, gasping as if she hadn’t orchestrated this already: Charles!

[ Charles startles a little bit but lets her excitedly take his hands with an indulgent [and slightly nerve wracked] head tilt]

Charles, eyes flitting around the room before settling on her: Ohh, someone’s excited. Yeah, Neeks?

Niko, smiling disarmingly: I need to talk to you

[she drags him into the hallway, kinda scarily determined]

[when they’re alone, Charles makes the effort to keep a foot of space between them- trying to appear as non threatening as possible]

[it’s all for naught though, because Niko doesn’t let go of his hand when he tries to pull away. No, she wraps herself around him in a hug]

[The ghost balks slightly, his arms awkwardly hovering around her before cautiously settling on her biceps- a barely there touch]

Charles, a little choked up: Uhm- [clears throat] what’s all this then? Everything alright? Just tell me who i need to fi- er.. sorry, bad joke

[she sighs pleasantly and burrows closer, her arms like a vice even to the ghost]

Niko: you didn’t scare me, you know. During the lighthouse case. I mean- it was definitely a little scary, when she wanted to take you guys to your afterlives, but- i was more worried, you know? Especially after you just- dropped

Charles, even colder to the touch then normal: dropped?

Niko: mhm, i think it was just before you pushed her into Angie. She made you relive something really bad, didn’t she?

[ Charles hands settle a little more firmly around her, a little more easily]

Charles, his smile a little wobbly: Nah, nothing like-

Niko: It’s okay to say it was. You can’t protect us all the time, sometimes- sometimes we want to protect you too.

Charles: I don’t need protecting-

Niko, squeezing tight: Just a hug for now then.

Notes:

my ear hurts so bad rn guys, it's not even funny

Chapter 10: Shovel Talk

Summary:

i just think it's really funny that Edwin clocked Charles interest in Crystal and then disliked her on principle for a little bit
-> meanwhile Charles met Monty, clocked his interest, and immediately tried to be his friend

Notes:

Edwin loves Charles.... so much..

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

[sometime in their London office, shortly after being granted immunity]

[ Crystal is lounging on their itty bitty couch, on her phone, and Edwin is at his desk. Charles is sitting on the floor next to him, rearranging the things in his bag]

Edwin, shutting his book with a crisp 'snap': Crystal. A moment, if you would.

[ Charles looks up curiously as Edwin stands, but the Edwardian just goes to squeeze his shoulder. He misses and briefly rests his hand atop Charles' head instead though, before hastily correcting himself]

[The psychic leans her head over the armrest, confused, but stands up to join Edwin in the hall]

Crystal, a little weirded out: Any reason we couldn't have in this conversation in front of Charles?

Edwin, turning to face her: I do not think he would approve of it

Crystal: Why? Is it the Cat King again? Are we killing someone?

Edwin: 'We' are doing nothing of the sort. Today, anyway. No, it is to my understanding that you and Charles have... affections for each other [She opens her mouth to correct him but he holds a hand up]

Edwin: Rest assured, I am not here to talk you out of it. Rather.. this is a warning

Crystal, protests momentarily forgotten: What, does he snore? I trapped a demon in my brain, I think I can handle-

Edwin: A warning from me.

Crystal: ...what?

Edwin: Crystal, I value our friendship- as I'm sure you're aware.

Crystal, vaguely unsettled: I sense a 'but' coming

Edwin, sharply: But Charles will always be my priority.

Crystal: ..right.

[ Edwin rests a hand on her shoulder, deceptively friendly. Crystal swallows]

Edwin: Your raw power may far outrank mine, Crystal, but I trust you know that that has never stopped this agency before. Should any harm come to Charles...

[His smile is... decidedly less than friendly. The psychic can feel the threat from their point of contact, and glances from his hand to him- sweating bullets]

Edwin: I won't hesitate to have you- let's say, removed from this plane of-

Crystal, throwing his hand off with shudder: WOAH, woah, woah! Okay, we decided to just stay friends, Edwin, fucking hell- Edwin, blinking: ...Oh.

Crystal: Yeah 'oh'. Jesus fucking Christ, dude

Notes:

and with that, that's all my prewritten dbda quotes ;3

stay tuned

Chapter 11: IT’S A CROSSOVER

Summary:

when your current interests collide like cold and warm fronts

Notes:

this is lowkey based on Tobias’ line about not believing in ghosts

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Charles: Hey, Edwin- mate? We're absolutely certain this bloke can't see ghosts right?

Edwin: Yes, I... believe we should be..

[cue the slow pan over to Tobias, who's staring into the corner of the room they're in like he can tell]

[Charles shuffles to the right]

[Tobias' head follows]

Edwin: ...let's move on to the next room..

Charles, already heading out the door: Yep-

Notes:

watch etoile‼️

and pretty please leave a comment ✨w✨

Chapter 12: Bug Boy Charles

Summary:

i made a post about it on tumblr a little while ago and just had to make a sketch to match

Notes:

HI HIII I RETURN!!!
-> i've been trying to make my skits into fics more often, instead of just leaving them as skits, but here's another one!!!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

[Charles is holding an Atlas Moth, absolutely enamored with the giant thing as she keeps perched in his palms]
Niko, almost equally as excited: Oh, she's so pretty..
Charles, beaming as the moth's wings slowly flutter: She is, isn't she? Right shame they only live for a week or two..
[Crystal and Edwin are standing about a foot or some back- a little more hesitant when it comes to the many-limbed creatures]
Niko: Really? I thought moths lived a lot longer than that
Charles: Well, most do- yeah. But their tongues are too small, see? They don't work
Crystal, her face scrunched: How do you know that-?
Charles, blinking widely like he'd forgotten she was there: Edwin told me
[He says it like it should be obvious, though not unkindly. The psychic turns to Edwin]
Crystal: I thought we were on the same team here, why do you know that?
Edwin, like it's the most obvious thing in the world: Charles likes bugs
[Niko giggles behind her hands]
Crystal: ...right.. of course

Notes:

friendly reminder that i DO take requests for fanfic!!! just leave a comment, or hit up your hopefully dear author on Tumblr [falling-star-cygnus]

as always, please leave a comment if you found this cute <3 <3 <3

Chapter 13: Tongue Piercings and Short Circuits

Summary:

i was thinking about my Detectives and Their Earrings series and thought of more piercings muehehe

Notes:

imagine Charles seeing someone with a tongue piercing, and then wondering how a ghost would go about getting a piercing they hadn't died with.

ears were relatively easy... but his tongue? hm..

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

[Charles is pondering this problem, leaning against their desk with his arms crossed, while Edwin fiddles with some item they'd taken as payment]
Charles, under his breath: I wonder if I could just...
Edwin, who had looked up when his partner started talking: Hm?
[The 80's ghost works his jaw a little bit, and then lights up with a muffled noise of joyful surprise]
Charles: I did it!
[He sticks his tongue out, which now sports a golden stud on it's center]
Charles: Oh, that's right brills, mate. I- mate?
[Edwin is just staring, slightly slack-jawed. His eyes trail up to Charles', then back down to his mouth- then he forces them up again]
[Charles rounds the desk to get a closer look at his suddenly mute friend]
Charles, worried: Edwin?
[The Edwardian suddenly snaps to attention, returning his eyes to the object he'd been messing with prior... prior to-]
[Edwin clears his throat, thanking Death herself that blushing was one of many functions he'd lost since becoming a ghost]
Edwin: Right- yes. Very good, Charles... er.. is that what you've been thinking about then? It looks quite nice
[Charles seems suspicious but relents, taking up the spot he usually did when potential clients came around]
[Then the last part of Edwin's rather stilted sentence registers, and rosy red spreads from his elfin ears to the bridge of his nose. And while the Edwardian was glad he had forgotten how to blush- he was even more pleased that Charles hadn't]
Charles, sticking his tongue out again to look at it: You think so?
[. . . . .]
[Edwin gives up on focusing on the object and buries his face in his hands]

Notes:

i love Edwin being down horrendous for Charles, and them having different abilities based on their mindsets >W<

your hopefully dear author had forgotten how fun skits could be to write!

please leave a comment if you enjoyed <3 <3 <3

Chapter 14

Summary:

we aaaall know that trope of miscommunication where you only overhear part of a conversation

and we all hate it.

so we're not doing that here

Notes:

the basis of this idea is: Edwin has disappeared for some reason or another, some bad reason- because it makes Charles antsy and snappish
↓ of course he gets out of it on his own, he's Edwin, and right in the nick of time because Charles is about to do something drastic to find him

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Charles, his jaw clenched: Ugh.. you sound just like Edwin right now, Crystal!

[Edwin pauses just before the ajar door of their office, shocked at the hostile spit of phrase. He can't mirror travel at the moment, due to some minor iron burns]

Crystal: Oh yeah, what a shocker. I don't want you to gut yourself for a spell that might not even work!

Niko, confused: Why did you say it like it's a bad thing...? Charles- not.. not Crystal. Edwin definitely wouldn't want you to gut yourself. I mean- I don't either, but.. you know..

[Charles is all Edwin can see from the tiny crack, so he gets a front row seat to the way his partner wavers and wilts in defeat]

Charles: It's- not, a bad thing. I'm sorry, Crystal, I just... I miss him. And I'm worried. What if-

[creeeeak]

[Edwin takes his hand away from the door, unconsciously having pushed it open as he'd crept forward]

Edwin, slowly lowering his hand: ...Charles, we really need to have a talk about your worrying habit of self mutilation

Notes:

heeey my dear readers <3 <3 <3

your hopefully dear author's account reaches a year old in just one month!!! [oct.1]
↓ i can't believe we've made it this far, i'm in shock, thank you all so so so much <3

i'm hoping to reach 900-1000 overall comments before that timestamp [we're at 860 currently] so please leave one if you enjoyed this snippet <3

and thank you again!

Chapter 15: Sand in Your Eyes

Summary:

guess who’s birthday is tomorrow 🥳

also i desperately need these three to meet

Notes:

your hopefully dear author hasn’t quite managed to sus out a fanfic for this shenanigan yet but oh well

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Morpheus: I remember you.. Edwin Payne.

[The boys are instantly on edge, sidling closer together]

[Charles takes hold of Edwin's wrist, subtly, while positioning himself slightly in front of the older ghost]

Morpheus: Be at ease. I have no intentions of taking you to my sisters. Nor any of separating you.

Edwin, cautious: Apologies... your sisters? Have we met before?

Morpheus: Perhaps not face to face. You used to visit my realm frequently. I found it odd, when I returned and yet you did not-however, I can now see the reason why.

Charles: Hold on a tick- your realm'? What's that about then?

[Morpheus' gaze slides over to the younger ghost- something that could be described as almost mournful filling his inexpressive face]

[A subtle emotion that Charles can only read due to his numerous years of experience reading his best friend]

Edwin, with realization dawning on him: My god- you're an Endless.

Morpheus, tipping his head: I am. Dream of the Endless, to be exact.

Charles: Endless-? Oh..! So you’re Death's brother, are you?

Edwin, hissing: Charles-

Morpheus: Indeed. I... apologize, to you specifically Charles Rowland.

[The Endless swallows minutely, subtly avoiding actually looking at the two young ghosts]

Charles, warily: ..Making me nervous to ask why there, bruv.

Morpheus, pressing his fingertips together and steeling himself back to monotony: It appears that I've missed your visits in their entirety, in my time away from the Dreaming

Notes:

please leave a comment if you liked it >w<

Notes:

this might be included in a future fic, but it won't get it's own unfortunately- it's just for laughs really

please leave a comment, your hopefully dear author craves the contact of the outside world