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"All love that does not have friendship for its base, is like a mansion built upon the sand."
The BAU, profiling itself, was something that, despite their dislike of each other, Gideon and Rossi had practically invented together. Gideon had immediately started gathering people as his disciples, even while the BAU was a room in the basement at the FBI building in Quantico. Rossi, although he taught, instructed and guided the recruits, hadn't had an actual protégé of his own. He'd never actually felt like he needed or wanted one.
Then he met Aaron Hotchner. The first time he saw Aaron, the young man was standing, a little out of the way, in the hallway that led to the BAU's basement space with one of Gideon's recruits. The recruit, Agent Jonathan Keller, was one that Rossi recognized only because he was bright but quick tempered. Too quick to go after the unsub, too slow to try and talk an unsub down. It had been causing a problem not only with the administrators, but within the BAU itself.
It doesn't take a profiler to figure out that Keller has, once again, let his temper get out of his control. The other man, whom Rossi vaguely recognizes as new, is calm on the surface but his stance shows he's on edge and a feeling little defensive. Keller's stance on the other hand is confrontational and angry and it is right there on the surface.
Rossi stalks forward, getting closer so he can hear what's got Keller all worked up, so worked up he looks like he wants to hit the other guy. It quickly becomes obvious why Keller's so angry, the younger man is not only winning the argument, he's winning an argument on why an unsub reacted the way he did. He's winning an argument on profiling, and he's not even taken any of Gideon's classes yet.
Which means the guy is good, has an instinctive ability that Rossi hasn't seen in any of the recruits, hasn't seen since he'd met Gideon. It also means that Keller is about two seconds from hitting the guy in the face because Keller is nothing if not prideful and he'd not lost an argument to anyone of the other recruits let alone a guy who had never even set foot in the BAU.
Rossi walks closer, not even trying for stealth, and though Keller doesn't notice him the other guy does, immediately breaking of his line of argument ("...suffering from delusions, and obviously submissive, not likely to display such organized tendencies which means there was obviously a partner who was-") to offer a sharp, "Agent Rossi," in greeting. Rossi nods back, even as Keller turns around to face him, a look of such intense anger on his face Rossi's a little concerned the young profiler's going to haul off and hit him. Keller doesn't though, and also doesn't greet him with much more than a grunted, "Sir."
The annoyed, and slightly affronted, look that passes over the other agent is something that Rossi doesn't miss even as he stares at Keller and states, "Agent Keller. Is something wrong here?"
"No, sir." Keller says sharply, eyes burning with anger, "Me and Agent Hotchner where just... discussing something."
Rossi doesn't like where this is heading, there is too much anger there in Keller's voice for this to turn out well. Ever. So he sends Keller to cool down with an easy command of, "There are files that you should be creating profiles for. Get to it."
For a moment he thinks Keller is going to argue, or hit him, or something else immensely stupid, but the man keeps a hold of his temper, if barely, and spins around to stalk past Hotchner without a word of acknowledgement to Rossi. Rossi watches him go before looking at the other agent, now identified to him as Agent Hotchner, once he's satisfied that Keller is at least heading towards the rest of the BAU agents.
Hotchner is making an effort to look as if he's not staring at Rossi, but it's pretty obvious the kid know who he is. And is a little enamored with him.
"Agent Hotchner," he says, stepping a little closer and examining the man in front of him.
"Yes, sir?" The other agent asks.
"You were arguing with Agent Keller about the Paradise Pair, the two brothers who killed six people together in Maine saying they were sending them to paradise." It's a statement, not a question. Rossi knows that Keller gets all worked up about the case, his father had worked it and thought there was only one killer at first. Keller was always trying to convince himself that even profilers would have gotten it wrong.
"Yes, sir." Hotchner responds, face carefully blank, body language un-revealing.
Rossi smiles a bit, and says, "Doing a damn good job winning the argument too, from what I heard."
Hotchner's startled gaze is a little satisfying.
"You're good, kid." Rossi says, an hour later when he's made Hotchner ("call me Hotch") sit with him in a coffee shop and profile everyone who comes in or leaves. "You've got great instincts, and you've obviously studied the materials. Why aren't you in the BAU yet?"
Hotch shrugs, taking a sip of his coffee (just a touch of sugar in it,) before he answers. "I wanted to get someone's attention, not just be a faceless, nameless recruit in a line of many." A wry smile. "Not quite the way I imagined doing it though."
Rossi grins back, "Take the classes, Hotch." He tells the younger agent, "You'll do well, and I'll vouch for you when you try for the BAU."
Hotch looks at him, a little stunned and Rossi looks back. For just a moment he sees beyond the stoic facade and sees just how broken the other man is. Then it's gone, hidden again. "Thank you." Hotch says and it's the most sincere thing Rossi's ever heard.
"It's no problem, kid. Like I said, you're good. We need people with your instincts in the BAU."
Hotch just bows his head, and Rossi can see the faint flush across his cheeks, and says it again, "Thank you. Very much."
It's obvious the guy doesn't know how to take the complement, maybe doesn't really even believe it. Rossi just shrugs, and doesn't say any more on the subject. They don't keep in contact exactly, but Rossi keeps an eye on Hotch as he moves through the program. He doesn't want to admit, even to himself, that he's surprisingly fond of the guy after less than a handful of interactions.
Gideon notices him of course; Rossi would have been shocked if he hadn't. Rossi is shocked by how possessive he feels when Gideon starts waxing on about the agent though, and how good he'll be in the BAU as one of Gideon's lackeys. And okay Gideon doesn't actually use the word "lackeys" but Rossi's not feeling particularly generous at the moment so too frickin' bad.
Rossi tells himself that the whole thing is ridiculous because he's never wanted a protégé before now, not like Gideon who surrounds himself with them. He'll teach sure, instruct, help out, give advice, but he's never wanted his own personal student. So the whole thing is ridiculous, he tells himself firmly,and that is that.
But it really isn't because Gideon keeps going on about him and Rossi still gets that possessive flare in his stomach, only now it's accompanied with a small flare of jealousy. Not of Hotch, but of Gideon for spending time with Hotch. Which is just fucked up, Rossi decides as he downs a glass of scotch.
Gideon goes on so much about Hotch that anyone, Rossi included, would think that the two of them had already become great friends. It therefore comes as a great surprise, at least to Rossi, that when Gideon finally brings him down to be introduced to the rest of them, Hotch practically makes a dash over to him. Only much more politely because, as Rossi had learned during his test of Hotch's instinct, Hotch is nothing if not unfailingly polite. Due, no doubt to his mother's strict upbringing Rossi knows, although he tamps that part of his mind down. They really aren't supposed to profile each other, especially not deliberately.
But Hotch does make a beeline to Rossi, stopping for numerous introductions along the way. When he finally gets there he holds his hand out, and with a bit of a grin introduces himself.
"Agent Aaron Hotchner, sir. But you can call me Hotch." There is something almost playful there, even though Rossi already knows the younger profiler, already knows the nickname. It's almost flirting which makes Rossi look at the man a second time and there is playfulness there, but it is low key, almost unnoticeable. So instead of reacting Rossi takes the hand that's offered, returning the introduction with his own.
"Agent David Rossi. Dave if you like." Hotch's smile brightens a little and his grip is warm, and there is something a little less broken in his eyes.
"Thank you, Dave." Hotch says, his hand squeezing a little tighter for a moment before he lets go. Hotch hardly leaves Rossi's side for the rest of the day, although he plays it off as just interest in the elder profiler's profiling skill. The streak of triumph Rossi experiences when he catches the put out and slightly confused look on Gideon's face when he realizes that Hotch is actively staying with Rossi is entirely inappropriate. (Although ultimately extremely satisfying.)
It's pretty obvious to everyone that Hotch is good. He's got the instinct and he makes the sort of connections that even some of the guys who have been there longer don't make. He rises through the ranks quickly and Rossi is proud because he's the one who found this kid, and he's the one who Hotch spends the most time around. Which isn't to say Hotch doesn't shadow the other profilers because he does. Hotch follows all of them around, silent and learning. Absorbing everything he needs to know.
But the first time Rossi invites Hotch home with him to meet Mrs. Rossi the third he thinks the kid's face is going to fall off he smiles so hard. And Hotch lets Rossi in more so than he lets any of the others. Eventually he makes friends with Gideon and some of the older profilers, but a lot of the other younger profilers think he's full of himself. He's better than them at their job so they don't like them.
But Hotch doesn't seem to put out by that and when Rossi asks Hotch only answers that he's never been really close to most people his own age.
The point, ultimately, being that Hotch lets Rossi in, although it takes a lot of pushing and a little profiling. Once he's in it doesn't take a lot of digging to figure out that in some ways Hotch is broken. Parts of him are fragmented beyond repair and there's a reason he suddenly stopped being a prosecutor and went the path of becoming a profiler.
There's more, hints behind hints of what his childhood was like, but Rossi doesn't get anything really concrete until a case in Yreka, California where the unsub was beating and killing ten year old children. They profile the man as being a father himself, who most likely beat his own son regularly and was probably an alcoholic. It's Hotch who makes the connection before the man kills his own son by looking in to medical records for all the kids in the area.
"It's not going to look suspicious," Hotch had explained to Rossi as they looked in to the medical records, "The father will have explained it away as a bike accident or his son getting in to fights with the other children. No one looks suspicious when they bring they're kid in and scold them for getting in to fights."
There's bitterness deep in Hotch's voice and in that moment Rossi can see this man as a child being dragged in to the E.R. and scolded by his father, the one who hurt him. Can see the bitterness and hopeless anger that would have built up inside that child. Rossi opens his mouth to say something, although he's not sure what, when Hotch exclaims: "Ah! Here, Jonathan Tolson, father of two. His oldest son, Timothy, has been to the E.R. at least once a month since he turned eight, two years ago, all for injuries from fights or accidents on his bike and/or roller skates."
Hotch looks up with a mean sort of grin on his face, "Got him." Then they're off, chasing this guy and then talking him down from killing his boy and Rossi doesn't have the chance to comment on what he's learned.
He continues not to have a chance to comment for one reason or another, mostly because Hotch is damn good at changing the subject or distracting him. Then the one time he practically has the guy cornered and all Hotch does is say "Dave" and look absolutely devastated and pleading and Rossi, who has always had a soft spot for the younger agent can't help but give in and back off. Even though he knows he's being manipulated.
Hotch's smile of gratitude is worth the knowledge though and Rossi can't find it in himself to truly feel too put out.
When he finally gets the chance he'd give just about anything not to have it because having it cost five children their lives and has left Hotch lying on Rossi's own bed drunk and lethargic. Which freaks Rossi out for a multitude of reasons, the biggest one being Hotch does not drink. He just doesn't. Rossi's seen him carry a single bottle of beer around a whole night and never finish the whole thing. Has watched him watch other agents down shot after shot, never joining in even while laughing at the rest of them. Hotch doesn't drink and he certainly doesn't get drunk.
"Hotch." Rossi tries to rouse his friend, a friend who had been more than a little affected by not being able to talk down this particular unsub before he brutally murdered all five of his children hostages, two who had been his own children. Hotch barely even acknowledged his existence.
"Come on, Aaron." A light shake, "Talk to me, kid."
When all Aaron does is turn his head away from Rossi, no answer appearing to be forthcoming, Rossi sighs a little.
"I'm not leaving you alone like this Aaron and I think you know this or you wouldn't have come and crashed in my room. You're the one who sought me out, so you got to give me something to work with, okay?"
After a long minute Aaron rolled over, looking up at Dave. "Shouldn' let this 'ffect me s'badly." He said, slurring a little, in deference to how much alcohol he'd consumed. Rossi sat down on the bed, keeping his eyes on Aaron's.
"Nonsense, Aaron, everyone has something that effects them a little worse than usual. You handled it exceptionally well in the field, didn't break down during the investigation or even in front of other people. Hell, I've seen agents who've been at this longer than you have break down in the middle of an investigation. Working this job, getting in to criminal's heads, it's hard. There is nothing wrong with getting a little sloshed once in a while and crying on someone else's shoulder. But you got to promise me, you'll only get drunk if there is someone for you to go to, okay?" He held Aaron's eyes for a long moment before the nod came. They sat in silence for a time before Aaron broke it again.
"I don't like drinking." He told the older agent. Rossi nodded watching his friend's expressions.
"I know, Aaron."
Aaron lifted his hands in front of his face, examining them and all was quiet for a moment. "My father drank."
A bitter laugh. "He was what they call a 'functioning alcoholic.' Drank at night to relive the stress of being a high profile prosecutor. He was good, you know. He put the bad men away for good. Which is why no one ever suspected that he came home to drink away the day and take his frustrations out on his eldest child. Because a man who did so much good couldn't be hitting his kid, no siree. Not Joshua Hotchner, who was so damn good at his job."
A sob broke off Aaron's little tirade and his hands came down to hide his face. Rossi gently strokes his hair, a small reassurance that he is still there, still listening.
"He always took me to the E.R. afterwards if something bad happened. I'd always been in a fight or fallen of my bike or tripped on the curb. And they believed him because he was such a damn good prosecutor that he couldn't have been a bad guy. But he- he-"
"He was." Rossi finished for him, "He was a bad guy and he hurt you very badly. It's okay, Aaron." Soft sobs are all that greet this statement.
For a moment all he does is stroke Aaron's hair, then, very slowly, he kicks if his shoes and slides in to place next to Aaron carefully pulling the younger man in to a hug. Automatically Aaron stiffens in his arms and a muffled, "What are you doing," is all the response he gets.
"Hush, kid, I'm not going to hurt you. Just take it easy, you're safe now."
Very slowly, very, very slowly, Aaron seems to accept it, finally relaxing in to the hug. After a long while, just as Rossi has begun to fall asleep Aaron turns in his arms so that the younger man is facing him. Tentatively, as though afraid Rossi is going to yell or hit him, Aaron lays his head on the older man's shoulder. It breaks Rossi's heart to see the man so unsure of himself and his actions.
"Dave?" Aaron asks very quietly as Rossi begins to drift towards dream land.
"Yes, Aaron?" Rossi responds just as quietly.
"Thank you." Rossi's never heard the other man sound so melancholy.
"It was no problem, Aaron. I'd do it again in a heartbeat."
Aaron nods against his shoulder, but Rossi can tell that the younger man isn't convinced. The kid has self esteem issues as big as the Nile is long.
"Sleep, Aaron. We'll talk in the morning."
"You'll still be here?" The question is heartbreaking and Rossi curses everyone who's left the kid on his own before.
"Yeah, I'll be here. Now go to sleep."
"'Kay, Dave." It doesn't take long before Aaron is asleep, alcohol and sleep deprivation working in tandem to put him out like a light in only moments. Rossi follows him very quickly and when he wakes it'll be after the best night of sleep he's had in longer than he can remember.
Rossi keeps his word, Aaron doesn't wake up alone. There is none of the embarrassment from Aaron that Rossi expects. Only a small smile and a quiet word of thanks. Neither of them really mentions it again, but there's a shift in the way they interact. It's a subtle undercurrent in all of their interactions.
Aaron never gets drunk without him there. Not once, and Rossi keeps him from doing stupid things, and holds him, and sleeps next to him. Neither of them is really sure what they're doing, but neither of them really wishes to change things. They never go farther, never step outside of their comfort zone, even when one or both of them wake up aroused, or when Aaron's a little too drunk and a little too flirty.
They stay where they are, as each other's comfort, as each other's support. And maybe they're fooling themselves thinking that's all they'll ever be, but for now, for this moment, it's good.
"Live in this moment because when tomorrow comes and it all comes crashing down around you, this moment will be the only good thing you have left to hold on to."
Finis.