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His footsteps tread lightly on the floor underneath him, the routine that came to be after everyone else went to sleep. Ever since joining the express on the journeys it goes on, joining other people that had accepted him into their home, he still felt uneasy. The guilt that lingered from Penacony kept him awake, tonight was no different. He stopped and looked out the window, the stars soft and warm glow, illuminating the boy they look at as he looked back into the endless galaxy in front of him. A sigh left his mouth as he turned and continued on, no one was ever up thankfully. Walking past the Archives, he heard a slight thud, a small feeling of concerned crossed his face but it was silent, maybe it was his imagination, continuing to walk, wings following the movements he made. He went down a different way than usual. He didn’t know how long he’d been walking around, it was endless, forever endless.
Maybe it’d been an hour of two of wandering around, the thud from the Archives a distant memory now, the train car was silent as ever, only the feet that belonged to him could be heard treading carefully underneath him and lightly as he walked on and on. Eventually he stumbled upon a piano kept in the corner, the shadows hiding it away. Something he had once cherished. Some light had returned to his eyes, wings fluttering slightly as he started towards it, pressing down on a key and hearing it sing out. A small, warm smile appeared on his face as he sat down, warming his hands up he began to play.
A song that he and Robin used to play together sung out as he hit the keys, a song that was special and warm too him, but that stuff was only a distant memory now. Humming along as he played, his fingers dancing as the soft, warm melody filled his ears, eyes closed, finally content to some extent.
A soft click was heard in the distance but he didn’t pay mind, everyone was heavy sleepers, he knew that from when he knocked a flower pot off one night on his walks through the express, apologising endlessly to the conductor, even though the spot was spotless by morning, the pot was replaced in no time. Someone sat beside him and he stopped, feeling someone else’s hand brush against his thigh, snapping his head to look beside him, “keep going” a voice he had heard, not much but heard, urged on. His eyes dark and sleepy, a tint of fear painted on them. Why was Dan Hang here? The thought popped up but not said outloud, “Ok” a soft word that came from Sunday’s mouth as he continued the song, humming softly once again, there wasn’t time to feel bad or question anything.
His fingers came to the end of the dance they played on the keys that lay under them, taking a breath and breathing out he looked over, the man who had joined had looked over to him as well, bowing his upper body slightly, saying a soft thank you, as he stood up and walked away, leaving the Halovian to his own company once again.
His eyes looked less wild.
-
The sounds came from out his door as he sat in his room
“Did you hear the piano last night? Maybe the express is haunted!” He heard, March 7th chime as she walked past, that was greeted with an "mhm" from Dan Heng. He heard her feet walking along happily as another pair followed with her. The guilt felt awful, I did wake them up, he thought to himself with his head down.
A knock came from the other side of the door. He stood, maybe it was Himeko bringing him a cup of coffee, a gesture he always cherished. He never left his room, Himeko and March would take turns bringing in drinks and food, even if it didn’t get finished, the gesture was always appreciated.
Standing up tall, feeling his spine lengthen out, he walked to the door and cracked it open ever so slightly. Dan Heng. His cheeks flushed as the memories from the night before flooded his mind, “I brought breakfast” The boy before him said. It was unusual, in fact never have happened before, he just heard March too. Snapping back to reality, out of his thoughts, he offered a small smile, “Thank you” he said opening the door more to take the dish that was handed to him. Dan Heng nodded as he turned to leave, “I’m sorry about last night” he spat out quickly, cheeks turning red. Dan Heng turned to him, “thank you for playing last night” was all he said before he turned and left. Dan Heng had always stared at him, burning holes into the back of his head, he never felt welcome with him even when he tried, this was different. Tears stung the back of his eyes as he closed the door. Reminders of sitting with Robin at the piano as kids, playing music and enjoying each others company took up his mind, he felt a tear fall as he sat back down.
-
Doors clicked closed, knees pulled to his chest as he dozed off many times but not enough to stay asleep. He heard the final door close and click, getting up, throwing his coat on and exiting his room. He began his evening stroll, his head too busy to enjoy it. He walked past the Archives and it was silent, maybe Dan Heng was asleep this time.
Maybe he’d been walking for hours or just minutes, he wouldn’t know. Stood in front of a window, the stars illuminating his face like they had every night since he started walking around and exploring during the nights. Sleep never came easy for him.
The walk came to the piano again, in front of him, the shadows pulling him in. His fingers danced again, this time it was rough, please shut up, he was begging in his head, no matter what he played it didn’t sing out. It grew violent and quick, he didn’t even notice the click of the door, the same that was opened the night before. Nothing was sounding right, he couldn’t hear it. Gasping for air he slammed his fingers down, head hung low, panting as his mind swam. He never should have come here, everything weighed him down, I should never have come here.
A hand snaked around his shoulders another lay on his hand, his head slighty turned to see Dan hang standing behind him. His mind plague with his past, everything that’s happened, “I’m sorry” he spat out, lowering his head again, trying to catch his breath, eyes devoid of anything. Dan Heng grabbed his hand, keeping a sturdy arm on his shoulder, a guy who was also burdened by his past, the one who found comfort in the songs he heard the night before.
Dan Heng encouraged Sunday to stand as he took both of them to the kitchen. It was a flick of the light, the seat Sunday now sat in and the warm drink in front of his face that brought him back to reality. A hand laid on his, a touch that was soft, as the eyes from the boy beside him burned holes in the side of his head, just like they always did. A thank you was spoken, both sat in silence, the only break was the occasional sip of the tea that sat in the cups in front of both. A slight redness creeped into Sunday’s face, quickly hid by his wings. Maybe it was embarrassment, he didn’t know what he was feeling.
The colour had returned to Sunday’s eyes now, the tea was gone, both cups were empty. Dan Heng got up, going to clean both of them out. Sunday stood up following, his thoughts seemed to quiet down when he was around Dan Heng. It was silent, a comfortable silence between both of them. Sunday rested his head on Dan Heng’s shoulder, feeling the flutter of a wing on his neck, a smile creeped up on Dan Heng’s face as he washed the cups out, laying them out too dry.
-
An arm was wrapped around his his waist, soft breathe blew on his neck, head rested on someone else’s, Sunday, he knew it immediately. He didn’t want to disturb him, when was the last good sleep the Halovian wrapped around him had gotten?
March had a spring in her step as Dan Heng walked out of the Archives after awhile, “Good morning” March said happily as she continued on her way, a slight nod came from Dan Heng as he followed. Going straight to make some more tea, the cups from last night still stood out to dry, he grabbed them and started making it. No one said anything as he took both cups on a tray back to the Archives, although it was noticed, Himeko offered a soft smile at Dan Heng’s back as he turned the corner.
The tray was set carefully down, looking over, wings directly over his face, Dan Heng chuckled a bit handing a cup to Sunday who showed his face again, taking one of his own, a thank you was said and they sat in silence once again, both not knowing what to say to the other.
They listened to the footsteps walk past as everyone went about their days. A slight knock outside the door sounded through the room. Sunday froze as Dan Heng stood up, the door opened and Himeko handed two dishes to the hands Dan Heng held out, she chuckled a bit, “thank you” they both said to each other, as the door closed. A bowl was set in front of him, “please enjoy” Dan Heng said sitting beside Sunday as he began eating his own.
Dan Heng sitting beside him, someone he didn’t mind sitting close to him on the express, a small smile spread across Sunday's face as he hid it with his wing.
Both ate in silence and finished in silence, “thank you for last night” Sunday said, “I haven’t slept that well in awhile” he finished lowering his head and closing his eyes, a small smile still remained, maybe I will be alright here. He thought to himself, quickly shaking it off as unease spread through him again.
A few hours of messing around in the Archives was all it took for someone to come knocking. Sunday was into what he was reading, he didn’t pay any attention to the knock that sounded. Dan Heng opened the door, “Pompom’s looking for Sunday, it’s his turn to help clean but no one can find him.” March 7th. Her voice rung happily through the room, Dan Heng let out a sigh and looked over, A name rung through the ears of the boy who was immersed in what he was reading, a soft tone that made him look up, “Sunday, Pompom wants you” Dan Heng said looking in the eyes of the Halovian staring back at him. Hearing a noise from March made Sunday stand up immediately, “thank you for letting me read some stuff” He said before dashing out the room, the events of the night swam in his head like they have been since he woke up.
The hand hold, walking, both of us curled up together, the soft goodnight and sweet dreams that was said. Dan Heng was a safe person?
Looking at the conductor as he was handed a broom, Sunday shared a smile, “I’ll get to work right away” he said knowing he’d rather run and go back to his room huddled under a blanket.
Cleaning took no time at all, One of Robin’s songs sung through the phonograph and he couldn’t help but hum along, the bittersweet feeling of listening to his sisters voice sing through it.
Back in his room he sat, quietly, once again it all washed over him. Tears fell and he sobbed, trying to be silent. How long had he been on the express now? How long ago did he leave Penacony? How long has it been since he last saw Robin? How long has it been since— but his thoughts and sobs were cut off from a knock on the door. He didn’t want to answer it. Another knock came as he choked on a sob and stood up. Wiping his eyes he opened the door, “You forgot this” his voice said, eyes soft and calm, handing Sunday the coat he had put on last night. “Thank you, Dan Heng” he said wiping his eyes more before reaching out to take the coat that Dan Heng held. Dan Heng turned and walked away as the door clicked closed behind him again.
-
Night fell again, it was later than normal when Sunday emerged from his room, directly to the piano. Before he knew it, his fingers were playing the keys again. He hummed along again, one of his sisters songs, he missed playing with her, he wished nothing had ever happened, that the two of them could make people happy. He finished playing, a soft chuckled escaped his lips as he stood, smiling warmly, his hands on the keys. Someones footsteps sounded behind him, but they sounded differently, was there two pairs? He wondered as he looked behind him, March 7th and the Trailblazer were stood looking at him. March had a wide smile, she heard it all. Wanting to avoid anything that was said he lowered his head he walked past, “I’m sorry” he said, “wait!” he heard March behind him but he ignored it. He was waking people up, fully waking them up, he didn’t want that. Although March was the only awake looking one, the Trailblazer looked half awake, probably less than half. He started his way back to where everyones rooms laid, where the safety behind his door was. The sounds of footsteps sounded close behind him. He couldn’t sleep even if he wanted to, it pained him a bit.
He didn’t even know what brought him here anymore, a small knock on the Archives door was all it took for it to open, openly being invited in, Sunday walked through, the door closing behind him. Dan Heng looked at Sunday, who just wanted a quiet mind like the night before. “Can I sleep in here?” He said, looking into Dan Heng’s eyes.
They were laid side by side, arms around each other, ones head on the other. Feeling breath on his neck, the shuddering and shivering in that he could hear, Dan Heng pulled Sunday’s head into his chest, rubbing a hand up and down his back, he knew what this feeling was, he knew it all too well, he knows it too well. “I’m sorry” Sunday said into the chest in front of him, holding tightly onto Dan Heng’s left hand, the right hand rubbing up and down Sunday’s back was warm and comforting, something that made him feel a bit better. Soft sobs escaped his mouth, holding more tightly on, hiding his face as best he could. A mind plagued from his past, he didn’t want any of this, how did he end up like this?
His hair was stuck to his face, Dan Heng pulled back, touching his forehead to Sunday’s. Sleep wasn’t coming to either of them, both were awake, one in tears and the other sat watching, fear was in his own eyes, silence was with them except for the slight sobs that came from Sunday. Both of them were warm in each others embrace. Dan Heng had closed his eye for a bit, dozing off, arms wrapped tightly around Sunday who was laid in front of him.
It didn’t take long for that never-ending nightmare to return, he shot up awake, eyes wild and breathing heavily, thinking it would be over when he went back to sleep, clearly he was wrong. His eyes darted around the room, eventually landing on one who was beside him, it’s just Sunday, he thought as he watched Sunday sit up. Dan Heng’s body collapsed on him, something sturdy to hold onto and fall into. Wasn’t that what he wanted? Sunday patted him on the back. He laid back down, taking Dan Heng with him.
Laid under Dan Heng, Sunday didn’t budge, he doesn’t know what that was or what just happened, his best guess was some kind of nightmare. Dan Heng’s body was shaking in his arms. Sunday pulled Dan Heng into his chest, wrapping his arms around his back, “you’re okay.” Sunday whispered in his ear.
-
It had been awhile and the night had passed, a knock came against the door. The door clicked open. Dan Heng looked behind him, as his back was to the door, Sunday curled up in front of him. Looking back at the figure in the doorway, he only saw March, tray with food on it in hand, she asked where Sunday was again and why he himself hasn’t come out to eat yet. She hadn’t noticed Sunday who laid in front of Dan Heng yet. Letting out a sigh and nudging Sunday a bit, Dan Heng stood up. Seeing that the Halovian hadn’t stirred yet, he put the blanket over him and walked out the room, taking March with and closing the door. March, who looked over, a million questions brewing in her head, showing on her face. He walked ahead, going straight where everyone else was waiting for him, “take this to him later at least” March said following behind, tray still in hand.
A few minutes later, Sunday had emerged and was faced at everyone, half awake had turned to fully awake as eyes looked at him, he found Dan Heng’s and maybe that was what soothed him a bit. He took a seat next to Dan Heng and sat in silence, this was his home now wasn’t it? He really had to accept it. Welt handed him something to eat, saying a quick thank you, Sunday took a bite. It was warm in his mouth, it only made him smile a bit. Eyes watched him from beside, a smile crept up there as well. March chirped, “what’s going on with you two? How did you get him out here?” A simple question directed at Dan Heng, still it made Sunday choke and spit his food out. He was handed a napkin, thrown into a coughing fit. Dan Heng handed him his glass of water and Sunday took a sip. He apologised for the mess and disturbance and Dan Heng rubbed a reassuring hand on his back which March quickly picked up on but didn’t say anything.
Sunday thanked everyone for the nice meal as he set off back to his room, a hand touched his shoulder and he looked back at Welt who gave a thank you, “come join us again soon” he said before both went in their opposite directions.
He walked past the Archives, a space that was safe for him to go in now, at least somewhere he felt safe to be in. The door flew open, when did he go back in? Sunday wondered as he looked at Dan Heng. He felt a hand on his arm and then a yank, the door being thrown closed behind them, a crack left in as it bounced off the frame. Dan Heng pulled Sunday tightly into him, arms wrapped around him, he was breathing heavily but Sunday didn’t know why. He only returned the hug, feeling the arms around his body tighten. Dan Heng pulled away and looked at Sunday in the eye, Sunday offered a warm smile. Dan Heng went to say something, literally anything about what they can consider themselves as and what even happened. Before he could Sunday’s lips were planted on his, not very well of course, his nose crashed into Dan Heng’s at first, then his teeth collided with Dan Heng’s lip. He let out a small sound of frustration before finally righting himself, throwing a little celebration party in his head, note that down, he thought to himself.
They pulled away after a while, Sunday was bright red as he cleared his throat, wings covering his cheeks, “I’m sorry” he said quickly, turning on his heel as he ran out the room, throwing the door open as he left. Dan Heng sat down in front of his make shift bed, hugging his knees, what even was that?
Dan Heng was stunned, he looked out his door, the door that was still open from where Sunday left, deciding he would get up and close it now. March walked past and looked at him, “You ok?” She asked. Dan Heng cleared his throat and nodded, “Yes” was all he said as he walked out, his head wasn’t clear from the night before still, now he’s got more stuff to deal and think with.
-
The piano sang throughout the night, Sunday hummed along. He found some kind of peace with this piano he stumbled upon. He still couldn’t sleep and no way he was going to ask Dan Heng again. Remembering about waking people up he stopped abruptly, a sigh escaped his mouth and he stood up, “thank you” he said to absolutely nobody but the piano in front of him. He went to a window and just stared out it, his eye glowing as he looked out at the endless starry galaxy laid out in front of him. The events of the day sat in his mind, more to be added to the pile of stuff he didn’t want to think about. Someone stood beside him, “I’m sorry about earlier” Sunday said, he knew who it was, he knew those footsteps. “You don’t need to be” Dan Heng said as he looked at Sunday beside him, the hand that sits so perfectly in his was now in his reach and he went for it, “Come on” He said holding Sunday’s hand in his hand, “I can’t keep taking up your space” Sunday said, "At least try to sleep than" Was all Dan Heng said as he dragged Sunday behind him.
Dan Heng brought him to his own door, Sunday looked up at him and opened the door, both looked at each other, “goodnight.” Sunday said as Dan Heng nodded, he wanted to say more, both of them did. They departed after the silence went on too long, neither able to say what they wanted to.
Feelings like these were neither of their strong points, especially feelings as strong as these ones. Sunday stared at the ceiling, I can’t sleep, was all he thought, the darkness was messing with his eyes. Sighing as he sat up, Sunday swung his legs and stood up. Sleep wasn’t going to come, it never did anymore, a mind full of the events of his life. Did he really care about waking people up? Yes, very much so, it would be rude to wake others, especially ones who gave him a place to stay. Yet his legs carried him out along the car. It was just a walk at first, making laps around trying to ease the thought in his head, he couldn’t go to Dan Heng again, not after earlier. He continued to walk, humming a song to himself. He passed the doors of the other express members, listening as he walked by each, everyone soundly sleeping. Silence enveloped him as he stopped humming and walking. A snore came from behind him, a room he had passed, he continued on his way, oblivious to all around him.
-
Dan Heng woke up, a night he slept through, coming to terms with his own past has always been a struggle, nightmares kept him awake most of the time. His mind jumped to Sunday, someone also burdened by their own past, someone he could understand. He rubbed his forehead, yawning as he stood up and left his room. March came up behind him, singing good morning like she always did every morning. He did love it here, his own family.
He walked in and greeted everyone in his own way, his eyes darted to the corner of the room where Sunday was standing, a cup of coffee in his hands, most likely from Himeko. Dan Heng stared at that corner, at the one he’s shared a lot of moments with in the past few days, Sunday snapped his head and looked at Dan Heng who offered him a slight smile, a nod was all he got in return, no sleep, was his best bet looking at Sunday’s eyes that looked absolutely exhausted. “What’s that face?” March said coming up behind him, he cleared his throat and dismissed the question, going to see what was on the schedule for today.
Thoughts swirled around Sunday’s mind, the warmth of the cup in his hand was fading, then he heard a crash. His eyes still stayed on that same spot on the floor, hand dropped to his side, wings flattened against his neck, “I’m sorry, I’ll get this cleaned up right away” he said to whoever had come in, he didn’t know who it was until they more into view, “Ah.. I’m very sorry, I’ll replace the mug I promise” Sunday said, panicked through his voice, head turned slightly. Dan Heng put a hand on his shoulder, a bit of comfort probably though it doesn’t do much, “I have spare clothes if you need them.” He said, Sunday hadn’t realised that the coffee didn’t just end up on the floor, embarrassment crept up in him. Dan Heng took his hand and lead Sunday back to his room, “I’ll get it cleaned up for you” Dan Heng said in a soft tone. Sunday thanked him and apologised once more, his throat felt tight, very tight and tears were willing their way through. He closed the door to his room as a sobbed escaped his mouth. There wasn’t anyway to stop it now as hot tears escaped his eyes, sobs making their way through his mouth.
He finished cleaning and sighed, “everything ok?” Was said behind him, all he did was nod. The voice that belonged to the Tailblazer, one he knew very well now, “thank you” he said turning his head and he was met with a smile from the grey haired being that had joined the express not so long ago, someone he’s formed close ties with now.
Very carefully Dan Heng walked, parking himself in front of the door that he heard sobs coming from, he hesitated knocking, I wouldn’t want anyone seeing me like that. Was all he thought. He heard another sob and turned on his heel, he never wanted anyone to see him when he first got here either.
Going into the party car, he looked at everyone as everyone looked at him, “no Sunday?” Himeko said as Dan Heng returned alone, he nodded and looked at Pom-pom who cleared his throat, but they were beat to it, “we’re going to make a stop at the Luofu, the general invited us over, want to come with us!?” March chirped, he pondered on that for a minute then nodded, it’d be nice to see everyone again, especially after what happened during the Wardence.
Sunday’s door flung open, he didn’t hear anyone around him. He choked on another sob, breathing in the air from outside his room, wiping his eyes he walked to the spot he visited every night, sitting down and lowering his head and lifting his hands on the keys, he played, letting his fingers glide around. Playing one of his sisters songs, the songs that give him the connection to his dear sister.
“Was that one of Robin’s songs?” A cheerful voice sung behind him as two pairs of steps walked towards him. “I’m surprised this still works” another voice said, Himeko and March were standing behind him, he didn’t dare look at them, not with the state he was in, “it was” is all he said before lifting his hands off, “I’m sorry for the trouble I have caused” He said, still facing away. A hand touched his shoulder, “you’re welcome here, Sunday” Himeko said in a soft, loving tone, “we want you here with us” March’s voice said, a smile on her face. If only that could heal the years of trauma he went through, for what he put everyone through back at Penacony, for everything he’s done since he boarded the Astral Express with everybody else here. He nodded, no word was said and he heard the footsteps walk away, “Please play as you wish too.” He heard Himeko mention before his was enveloped in silence again.
-
Maybe it was the the shaking against him, arms snaked around his waist, tightening, feeling the wall behind him, pressing into his back, rubbing his hands on the back of the one in front of him, “You’re safe, it's okay” Sunday whispered into Dan Heng’s ear. His nightly walk had turned into something different when he heard the gasping and panting from the room he walked past, he didn’t quite know what Dan Heng had gone through, but it was enough to put him in such a state at night.
The shuddering and gasping for air had passed, it was silent now, only the shakes in his arms, had remained, “You’re safe, I promise” he whispered, placing a hand on the back of Dan Heng’s head as it was rested on his shoulder.
“Would you like me to stay?” Sunday asked after handing Dan Heng a warm cup of tea and a glass of water that he had retrieved, it was a small nod but he noticed, sitting down against the wall. It was silence except for the small sips coming from beside Sunday, he didn’t know how long had passed until Dan Heng’s head rested on his shoulder, small snores coming from next to him. He stared at the wall that stood ahead of him, maybe he’d doze off as well.
-
*a few system days later *
Dan Heng stood with the rest of crew, Sunday was no where to be seen, it was a clear indicator he was going to stay back with Pom-pom and help around. “Is he not coming then?” March said not to anyone particular, “Afraid not, he hasn’t left his room, I gave him a knock to say” Himeko replied back to March, she looked a bit disappointed. Looking at Dan Heng she sighed, “We’ll have to bring something back for him, ok?” She said, clearing his throat he looked at her, “of course” he responded.
Pom-pom came out and saw everyone off, wishing them safety and fun on this short trip. Dan Heng was last to leave, looking back at Pom-pom, “look after him please” he said before turning and following everyone else, that uneasy feeling sitting began again but he tried to push it back down, this was a fun visit.
Yunli had come to visit at the same time as the express had, guess it was a get together with everyone after what happened at the Wardence. The express crew all talked with the General and exchanged greetings and farewells. Yunli walked with Yanqing, meeting up with Dan Heng, the Trailblazer and March, after the 3 set off on their own, Welt and Himeko staying back to talk with jing Yuan. March was sharing about how she’d been cleaning up her sword techniques. The talk droned on, Yunli Yanqing and March all happily discussing stuff about swords, the Trailblazer listening and throwing a few comments into the conversation. Dan Heng wasn’t paying much attention.
The group stopped to grab something to eat in Aurum Alley. There wasn’t much talk, nothing really directed towards Dan Heng anyways. He looked at the drink in his cup, his mind wandered to Sunday, all alone in the room that was his on the express. He snapped back to reality, why him? Dan Heng wondered as March looked at him, then everyone else turned to look, “are you feeling ok?” Yanqing said and Dan Heng nodded, “yes sorry, please excuse me” He said standing to leave. He needed space, he needed his own head. Why was he thinking of the Halovian that was still on the express? He didn’t know how to feel or even what he was feeling. He turned the corner with his hand on a wall, taking simple breaths, breathing in the cool air, why HIM?
He made his way back to the group, taking a huge gulp of the drink he left behind, “I’m fine” he said before any questions were asked. Ignoring the stares, the conversation went away from him as well as everyones attention after awhile. He looked down and closed his eyes, listening to the voices of the 4 people sat with him.
The knock on the door sounded, it was different. He stood up as his blanket fell to the floor. The door opened before he had a chance and he was greeted by Pompom, this only meant everyone was gone and off the express now, so he’d have to help around, which he didn’t mind, it’s the most he could do while everyone else was away.
Time had passed quite quickly already, a message from Pom-pom came through which was a quick check in with everyone, Dan Heng , the Trailblazer and March sent their status’s and made their way back to meet up with Himeko and Welt, saying goodbye to Yunli and Yanqing. Their trip was to come to an end tomorrow but Dan Heng’s unease creeped up more, maybe it was the nightmares that had come back worse than ever or maybe it was something entirely different.
-
Sunday sat in the party car unsure of what he should do now, the train cars looked spotless now, he was quite happy he helped out. He made his way back to the piano, there was no one he would accidentally wake up, he never saw Pom-pom at night anyways. He warmed up his hands, a song that meant the world to him, one he and Robin both loved danced through the car, the melody singing out into the darkness of the night, the spots were the stars illuminate the floor by the windows. Sunday’s head swam with everything inside of it, from one thought to another, from being a child to joining the express, bouncing back to the events of Penacony. Tears pricked back at his eyes. He longed to be back with his sister, isn’t that it? He wanted to right himself, he felt like a bird without wings, a bird that couldn’t fly. Maybe a sob did escape his mouth, maybe a few did and maybe he was full on sobbing, letting out a cry into the endless nothingness, only the stars watching him.
Maybe the windows he stares out, knowing everyones watching him cautiously because he still can’t be fully trusted yet can he? The closest thing he felt to acceptance was Dan Heng, the one who offered him a place to stay in the dead of the night, who gave a warm cup of tea and a reassuring hug to, the one who observed him the hardest, the one who burned holes in the wings of the boy who was only looking out the window, what Sunday had done since boarding was nothing, he sat and stared, he cried and kept his distance from everyone, he wasn’t part of the crew, but somehow, someone made him feel like he was part. He choked on a sob, slamming his hands down on the keys, tears falling from his face.
-
“Welcome back everybody” Pompom said welcoming everyone back on board, “the car looks great Pom-pom” Himeko said as she greeted Pompom, handing the souvenir everyone picked out for them.
Dan Heng went to the kitchen to put a some tea away, the same he and Sunday had been drinking. He started walking into the party car after greeting Pompom, telling about the trip from his point of view. He saw Sunday, in that same spot, staring out the window, just like when he first arrived, before he got his own room. He didn’t look up as Dan Heng sat down. Neither spoke, neither said a word. Both minds plagued, shackled and burdened towards their pasts, it was Dan Feng, Dan Heng always told himself which never helped.
March and the Trailblazer came in and settled down beside Dan Heng, both talking about how much fun they had. March looked at Dan Heng who had his eyes locked onto Sunday which felt oddly familiar, but why was Sunday out here all of a sudden. March leaned over “You’re burning holes into him again” she whispered as if it mattered. Dan Heng broke contact looking down and clearing his throat. Pom-pom walked into the car with Himeko, both approaching Sunday, he finally moved and looked at them.
Sunday took a warm cup of coffee from Himeko, giving a smile and a thank you, “I hope your trip was good” was the only words Dan Heng had heard. Sunday waited for both to leave before setting the cup down and looking back out the window, he shifted his attention for a second, looking to where the others were, locking eyes with Dan Heng, his breath catching a bit, but for what reason? He stood up, grabbing his cup, he walked out of the car, back to his room, the door shutting softly behind him.
Dan Heng had locked eyes for a second, watching the Halovian leave, “see you scared hi-..” March started then stopped, “why are you so red?” She pointed out. He stood up, muttering a quick nothing and walking out the car. “What’s going on with those two anyways” the Trailblazer asked beside March and she shrugged her shoulders, “I don’t actually know” she responded honestly.
Sunday opened the door to his room to see Dan Heng standing there, a tray with two bowls held in his hands, “May I?” He said and Sunday nodded, moving out of the way, closing the door behind. Dan Heng set the tray down, not knowing what guided him back behind him, his arms were around Sunday who had also returned the favour, “I missed you a lot” Sunday said, breaking the silence that had started between the two. They broke off after a few more seconds and sat down across from each other, silence was in the room as they ate, Sunday sipped on the soup he was given, the same as most other times Dan Heng brought him something to eat, he’d never complain, it was a time he felt warm.
Both finished in silence, “thank you” Sunday said as his eyes met Dan Heng’s, his eyes felt warm, peaceful to him. Dan Heng stood up nodding, he went to grab their dishes but Sunday pulled him down, his lips landing on Dan Heng’s,
Sunday was soft and gentle, but it was obvious he didn’t know what he was doing as much. Dan Heng placed a hand on the back of the Halovian’s head, both taking a breath and connecting themselves again. It was the moment Sunday felt Dan Hengs tongue connect with his that panicked and pulled away, his face red. Dan Heng looked at him, “I’m sorry” He said looking away, Sunday shook his head covering his face with his wings, he took a breath and removed them looking back at Dan Heng’s eyes, he took another breathe, shaky as it left his mouth, “I don't why it was you of all people” he said looking down. He looked up again at Dan Heng's eyes, "Thank you for letting me feel safe somewhere here."
Dan Heng moved Sunday’s hair away from his eyes, planting a kiss on his forehead and moving his down so their foreheads connected, there was peace for both of them right at this moment, lips connecting once again, Dan Heng placed a hand on the back of Sunday’s head again, pulling him closer, yes it was messy, both inexperienced, but it was still meaningful, for both of them. Dan Heng slipped his tongue into Sunday’s mouth again, he let out a small noise but didn’t yank away. Sunday fell into Dan Heng as Dan Hengs arm supported him by his hand, Sunday cupped Dan Heng’s face in his hand, the very hand that helped to bring them both together in the first place, the hand that contributed to such a beautiful melody that sung out to the one in front of him who was guiding him through it.
The door clicked opened, it wasn’t very audible, Sunday opened his eyes, he pulled back from Dan Heng, catching his breath, March stood in the door way eyes wide and staring, Sunday felt cornered, something he never wanted to feel again, “please knock next time” Dan Heng said softly as his breathing slowed back too normal, looking over at Sunday who was wide eye’d and looking at her. “I’m really sorry, we couldn’t find either of you and got worried, you weren’t in the Archives or any of your usual spots and” March said, cutting herself off as she looked at Sunday, this mysterious person she barely knew, lips connected with someone she’s explored different worlds with, “I’m really sorry” a soft smile spread across her face "Pom-pom wants everyone to come out, come when you're ready." March said as she closed the door, her footsteps echoing down the hall. Dan Heng moved towards Sunday bringing him in closer into a tight reassuring hug. Sunday felt on edge, why was he so tense around everyone else, why was is it only Dan Heng he could be around anyways?
-
The night passed by quickly, both slept through the entire night. Dan Heng curled up on Sunday’s bed, Sunday curled up with him, both emerging from the same room in the morning.
Sunday stayed behind Dan Heng as they both came out to join the rest of the crew in the morning, taking a seat away from everyone, Dan Heng looked at Sunday who was quiet as usual, staring out whatever window he could. Two cups landed in front of them, the Trailblazer offered a smile at the Halovian who was now peeking around Dan Heng’s shoulder, he gave a slight smile back as Dan Heng said a thank you, a warm, gentle and caring hold of his hand drew his attention away, looking at everyone now turned away, Dan Heng planted a kiss on Sunday’s forehead.
They always had silences, they didn’t talk much, not knowing what to say half of the time, neither truly knew what was swimming around in the other ones head, offering a warm embrace was the one thing both did when needed. Sunday smiled a bit to himself, Dan Heng’s hand in his, he wasn’t alone now, there was some kind of happiness deep within him.
March and the Trailblazer ended up seated around them as well, both chatting away, trying to engage Dan Heng to speak with them, seeing if they can spark something out of Sunday who now was holding onto of Dan Heng’s ring finger. The Trailblazer excused themself for a minute and Dan Heng turned to March, “did you tell anyone?” He inquired, needing to know and she looked around and sighed just as the Trailblazer walked back over, March pointed a finger and Dan Heng sighed. Dan Heng turned and looked, “you know?” He gestured at the Halovian behind him, being given a nod back from the grey haired one in front of him, Sunday looked down, “I should..” He started as he got up, “no need” Dan Heng said grabbing his hand and pulling him back down beside him.
March struck up conversation with Dan Heng, a hand landed on Sunday’s shoulder and he snapped his head around, “what’s going on with you, Sunny?” The Trailblazer asked and Sunday stared, a dead panned expression on his face, “I would prefer not to be called that, please” he stated and Dan Heng looked back, March giggled a bit, “ got it” the Trailblazer said lifting a hand to their forehead, the most reaction they'd seen from hhim. Sunday looked back at March who was now giggling, a bit confused but he chuckled a bit regardless.
“Sunday and March can you guys go drop these off? Just go speak to Asta, she’ll know what to do” Himeko said as she, March, the Trailblazer and Sunday left the express, Sunday wasn’t a big fan of this, not one bit, but it was his turn, apparently. March took what Himeko had and gave a smile, “You got it” she said as she grabbed Sunday’s hand pulling him behind her, “no need to worry ok? I know where we’re going.” She said dropping Sunday’s hand as he trailed behind her.
Dan Heng watched from a window and he sighed as everyone left his sight. Why was he so interested in Sunday? The one who manipulated them all, almost killed them. Everyone didn’t seem to mind, he minded until something clicked, that the winged man that he deemed as evil was just a flightless bird, someone who needed a real home, someone who’s guilt showed on his face, who was apologising constantly and still does. But was it really that? Is that what clicked?
“Thank you for coming guys” Asta said smiling, March giggled a bit and their conversation went on as something caught Sunday’s eye, Himeko and the Trailblazer walked up, they all offered their greetings and farewells. Conversation continued within the group as they walked back to the express, only Sunday stayed quiet in the back, nothing was alright was it. All he cold think about was what he did to them. Entering the express again, everyone went to say hi to Pompom and Welt. Dan Heng was nowhere to be seen, most likely he was in the Archives. Sunday thanked March for guiding him. Going back to his room, closing the door behind him.
-
“So are we in agreement with this then?” Pompom announced to the express crew. Sunday, a man who tried to kill them and manipulated them, on the express, in their home, living with them. Dan Heng was weary. Very weary. He wanted to object, he did object, but everyone else didn’t seem to mind, he was outvoted by a lot.
Sitting and watching Sunday was what the normal was, Dan Heng didn’t want his family in danger. Multiple times he watched someone approach the winged one that he stared at, getting no response in return, eyes showing nothing, they only looked gentle but empty, but what if something did happen?
“You’ll burn holes in the side of his head” was all March said when she would come to hang out. Dan Heng never budged, he didn’t like this entire thing one bit.
It had been a good while but Pompom finally told Sunday he had his own room, a bit of light turned on in his eyes. He won’t lingering anymore.. Dan Heng thought, but it wasn’t a very positive outcome. Sunday never left his room, never came to eat or discuss plans with everyone. Sometimes cries would come behind the door he closed so tightly, everyone’s heard it but no one said a thing, what could they even do? He ignored everyone who knocked, his painful attempt at silencing himself was as much of a reply they were going to get. One night after Dan Heng was awoken by a nightmare that he hadn’t had in awhile, he walked past Sunday’s room, hearing a painful, agonising cry from the other side of the door. He knew what it was like, shackled by your own past, not knowing how to get out. Even hearing this stuff, he still kept his guard up, but why wouldn’t he? The express was his home now.
The days turned into many, Sunday still never left the room he was given, Himeko would bring him coffee or something to eat, she would come out and mentioned something, his eyes being red and inflamed, eyes devoid of all life that could have existed. March would try to bring it up to someone but everyone dismissed her. Sometimes eyedrops and warms cups of tea were delivered to the Halovian’s door, but he never spoke a word, just mumbled a thank you and clicked the door closed once again. That’s how it was.
Dan Heng had shot up from another nightmare, slamming himself against the wall, panting heavily. His nightmares seemed on and off these days, somedays they were bad and some days he slept soundly, they had been returning more again, this same situation arrived again. Alone he would sit, panting and darting his eyes around the room, anything could happen if he closed his eyes.
He heard the sound of a piano playing after awhile, a song singing out. Getting up as he did, walking lightly to his door, clicking it open and peeking his head out. Following the song he was hearing, letting the stars illuminate the path he walked on. Going out and finding him was a surprise, the pained yet satisfied expression on his face, Sunday was sat, barely visible in the shadows, stars lighting up his back. Dan Heng would recognise the outline of wings and the halo that sat on the head of the figure. The melody came to its end, Dan Heng who heard nothing more, silence beginning once again, sitting down, wanting more, needing it, ringing and traveling through him. “Keep going” was all he managed, another song started singing out. Dan Heng’s mind quieting as he listened to the song the man beside him played, the man who didn’t look like the villain he made him out to be. Sunday wasn’t really evil was he? He’s known this for ages.
-
A knock sounded the door outside his room, wings fluttered as he stood and went to the door. He opened the door, staring at the girl with pink hair that was stood in front of him, not who he was expecting. Before he had a chance to object to anything she said, saying he was about to sleep, his hand was in hers and he was dragged out of the safety that room provided for him. March dragged Sunday behind her, going out to the main express car he looked around at everyones faces, locking eyes with Dan Heng who sat away from the others, nose in a book. So distracted by the dark haired guy he loved, a blanket flew at his face, he stumbled a bit, correcting himself as March looked smiling. His breathe caught a bit as he looked around to see everyone once again, “Come on we’re all sleeping out here tonight!” March said cheerfully, the smile she wore never left her face. She sat down on the makeshift bed she had created, gesturing to the spot next to her, someone else’s makeshift bed laid next to the spot he was offered, recognising the blanket that was laid over top of him one morning. He sighed setting up next to March and sitting down, everyone was busying themselves in something, he spoke a bit with Pom-pom and Welt, Sunday didn’t have much to say, he contributed a bit. The eyes of the Halovian wandered over to Dan Heng again who was now looking back at him, listening to every word Sunday spoke.
Everyone had fallen asleep, the silence enveloped the train car. Sunday was stood looking out the window once again, a routine that had been since he joined the express, maybe he could be comfortable here. Looking back at everyone, he smiled warmly, everyone slept soundly. He stood up taking one last look at the stars that stretched out on the endless sky, illuminating his face. A hand landed over his hand and he looked over, that familiar warm feeling, one he knew very well by now, “March is happy you could join us” the voice said beside him, Sunday looked over at Dan Heng, he smiled a bit, wings flapping lightly as he looked back out the window, “thank you for letting me board” was all he said before turning his back to the window, he wanted to add on how grateful he felt that Dan Heng let him find a place of comfort, maybe he would someday. “Let’s go to sleep” Sunday said, moving back towards the makeshift bed he made next to March, a warm smile on his face as Dan Heng trailed behind.
The warmth of a body in front of him was all Dan Heng needed to sleep, same way the one in front needing the warmth from behind. An arm wrapped over Sunday’s waist, Dan Heng turned over, tucking Sunday’s head under his own. Sunday held Dan Heng’s left hand in both of his hands, “thank you” one of them spoke before sleep fell over both of them.
-
Morning came once again, March joined Himeko as she looked at the two boys curled up together, “I never though either of them would come around” March said as she walked up, Himeko nodded as Dan Heng began to stir. He locked his eyes onto Sunday’s face, his wings twitching a bit, eyes closed and resting peacefully. He smiled as he very carefully went to sit up, careful as he stood. He looked at March as she looked at them, she was smiling as their eyes met. He turned a small shade of red as he made his way back to the Archives, needing a minute to himself. He closed the door and put a hand on his chest, never thinking that he would warm up and share such special moments with Sunday of all people.
The day trailed on as usual, Sunday stayed in his room for awhile, still not feeling fully comfortable and accepted within the express, but it was probably all in his head, it was all in his head. Everyone (minus Dan Heng) didn’t mind him joining at first, they could have left him behind but they didn’t, they should have, after everything. Welt’s words sung through his head but the guilt was stronger. His head full of his actions, actions he was sure were right at the moment. A knock came from the door, distracting him. He took a breath and cracked it open, peeking out. Dan Heng. He opened the door fully and closed it tightly once the other had walked in, turning around to look at the new pair of eyes in the room. A thumb met the underneath of the Halovian’s eye, it laid wet, where Sunday hadn’t notice the tears falling. A reassuring smile came from Dan Heng, tears pricked at Sunday’s eyes, collapsing into Dan Heng’s arms, legs giving out as he broke down in tears again, muttering “Im sorry” many times, more than could be counted. Dan Heng lowered them both to the ground, gently and carefully. Sunday spat out many words in-between his sobs, gribbing onto the clothes Dan Heng had put on that morning. Dan heng pushed the Halovian’s head into his chest, he hadn’t heard this in awhile. Was this how it was when he had first come to join the express? He was right back to when he first come to be with everybody. He looked down at the man he held so softly, a hint of sadness behind his eyes, seeing himself in someone else, “You’re going too be ok, you’re safe here now, we won’t let anything happen” was all Dan Heng said, rubbing a hand down Sunday’s back, the cries had softened, but maybe it was the air Sunday was needing back into his lungs. A knock on the door had come, a knock on the door always arrived.
“Thank you, Himeko” Dan Heng said as he took a bowl from Himeko who stood at the doorway, she looked sadly at Sunday, his face red and wet, the light in the room showing his clear, glowy, wet eyes as he looked at the floor in front of him, Dan Heng turned as the door started to close, “Thank you.” Sunday said lifting his head up catching Himeko’s smile before she closed the door completely, leaving both of them alone to themselves again. Sunday took the bowl from Dan Heng’s hands, the warmth spreading to his fingers, he took a sip of the soup that was inside the bowl he was given, the warmth sliding down his throat was reassuring. He had it finished within a few minutes, not knowing he was hungry despite skipping every meal today even when people came knocking.
“I’m sorry” Sunday said again, Dan Heng shook his head, “you’ve apologised enough, you’re welcome here, Sunday.” The twos eyes locked together, Sunday wanted to protest, wanted to scream everything away. But before he could, their lips collided, their foreheads laying on each others after a few seconds, “you’re welcome here.” Dan Heng said again, before Sunday could say something, anything at all, Dan Heng’s mouth landed on his, tasting the soup Sunday had just finished. Pulling away and pushing Sunday’s hair off his face, he smiled, a warm one. Sunday connected them once again, falling on top of Dan Heng, pulling apart they stared at each other, Sunday’s hands on either side of the floor beside Dan Heng’s head, who’s legs curled tightly around the waist of the Halovian over top of him. Sunday looked for awhile before a smile broke out on his face, the first one Dan Heng had seen from him since he boarded, one that didn’t have pain hidden behind it. Sunday’s eyes, happiest they’ve been since both of them laid eyes on the other. Sunday let himself fall on Dan Heng, “Thank you” he said against Dan Heng’s shoulder.
The two stayed in this position for awhile, exchanging small gestures here and there. Sundays mouth went to Dan Heng’s again, hands on either side of Dang Heng’s head, steadying himself as they pushed against each others mouths, letting their tongues collide and explore each others mouths. Dan Heng’s knees wrapped around Sunday, tightening against him so they wouldn’t lose balance, or maybe it was the feeling of someone elses tongue in his mouth. Pulling away from each other, a second to breathe and going right back to each other, not wasting a second. Sunday gasped a bit as he came down on Dan Heng, his arms giving out, heads colliding and a sharp pain appeared in Sunday’s mouth, “I’m so sorry” he said panting as he sat up, “are you okay?” Dan Heng said sitting up as well, ignoring the pain that appeared in front of his head, nodding, Sunday looked down, his breath catching a few times, “I’m sorry” was all Sunday heard before he closed the distance again, a taste of blood went to Dan Heng’s mouth, he felt bad but Sunday pushed them back into the position they were once in, “I love you” one of them spoke out, against the other ones mouth, embraced in each other. Dan Heng ran a hand up Sunday, from his waist, up his back, as he met the back of his head, the Halovian’s wings fluttering, Sunday pushing into Dan Heng harder, another I love you was said, breathing against each other, embraced and fully with each other. Sunday laced his fingers with Dan Heng's, the world around them quiet, only listening to each others breathing and feeling for the others movements. It was just them right now. “Thank you” Sunday said as Dan Heng pulled him closer and harder against him, maybe it was all messy, neither knowing what they were doing, but they still cherished all their moments, leaving the day for themselves.
-
Dancing his hands along the keys, humming along, Dan Heng had joined him, a head rested on Sunday’s shoulder. The music sung out, he moved into singing the songs softly, ones that he’s played many times before, a wing wrapped around the back of Dan Heng’s head. The night continued on as Sunday played.
Dan Heng’s lips went to Sunday’s, he stopped his hands, returning the favour, any distance erased. They both stood and went back to the Archives, admiring the stars as they went past the windows, hand in hand, door closing behind them as they said goodnight to the silence in the train car, collapsing on top of each other. A goodnight passed by both of their lips, as their eyes locked, embracing each other. A smile on both of their faces as they slept.
“Don’t be shackled by the past… That goes for both of us.”
-
They came out of the Archives the next morning, hand in hand, a soft smile lined the Halovian’s face as he walked next to Dan Heng who also wore a smile. March greeting them as she exited her room.
Sitting with one another, Sunday on the floor in front of the chair Dan Heng was sat in, head leaned back against the other boys knee, finally content with his current placement in the express. Sunday let a soft sound leave his mouth, closing his eyes, his wings fluttering a bit. Dan Heng smiled a bit, warmth spreading through his chest, planting a kiss on the top of the Sunday’s head. Sunday reached up, pulling Dan Heng’s head to his.
This was all they needed at this moment.