Chapter Text
T: “Evan! I’m home!”
E: “Hey Tommy!!”
T: “Hey, what you got there?”
E: “Oh.. uhm nothing! It’s uh nothing important..”
T: *brows furrowed, concerned* “Are you sure? It doesn’t seem like nothing.”
E: “Uh yeah! I mean I guess it’s kind of big but it’s not like it’s gonna happen for real. Everyone at the 118 needs me, I don’t think I can just leave, you know? But like, I think I need to. I- I think I need a new environment? I guess, or new people? I don’t know. But I mean, I’m still trying to figure out like the ins and outs of all this and it’s kind of a lot and-”
T: “Woah, slow down, Evan. What are you talking about?”
E: “Oh, yeah sorry.” *curls in on himself, embarrassed about rambling so much*
T: *grabs hold of Evan's chin and makes him look up at him* “Hey, no. You know I love listening to you talk, baby. Sorry if I didn’t phrase it well. I wasn’t trying to stop you; I just needed more context. I was confused. I’m sorry.”
E: “You sure?”
T: *nods* “Yes, sweetheart. I love listening to you. Your internet dives are so often the highlight of my day.” *smiles* “Now do you want to tell me what’s going on with you? It’s okay if you don’t. We can table this conversation first and get back to it when you’re ready.”
E: *sighs* “No, I don’t think I should. If I put this off any longer, I won’t ever talk about it and I’ll probably just start spiraling sooner or later.”
T: *smiles proudly*
Beat
E: “I’m thinking of transferring out of the 118.”
T: “Oh.”
E: “It’s a bad idea, isn’t it? I knew it. I was stupid for even considering it. I-”
T: “Hey, hey, no. No, baby. I didn’t say that. I was just surprised for a second.”
E: *looks down* “I just- I don’t think I can continue at the 118. Not after everything. I’ve wanted to transfer or quit so many times before, but they always stopped me from doing it for whatever reason.” *thinking of the lawsuit and when Chim and Maddie left*
T: “That’s fair enough.”
E: “Really?”
T: “Of course. It’s your choice. It’s always been your choice. They don’t have the right to tell you what to do with your life. Especially when they’re the ones making it hell.”
E: “Wha- Tommy!”
T: “What? It’s true. None of them have offered you any support in the slightest since Bobby died, least of all Eddie. I’m just saying, they shouldn’t get to dictate your life when they never even bothered to step into it. Except for Ravi, of course.”
E: “Heh, yeah, that kid’s pretty great, huh? *smiles*
T: *chuckles, smiles and nods*
E: *sighs* “Anyways, I… I just thought, you know, maybe it’s time to actually, I don’t know branch out? I guess? I mean, that’s good, right? In the LAFD? To get more experience with things at different stations?”
T: “Well, yes, it’s typically thought to be pretty good for you to try working at different stations to try and get a feel of different kinds of leadership styles. Gives you more experience and ensures that you’re not just working at the same place and with the same people all the time.”
E: “Yeah, well, there’s that. And there’s also the fact that Chim is looking to become the new captain now and since we’re brothers-in-law, I don’t think I’m legally allowed to work under him right now, right?”
T: *nods, pauses, then trunks to Evan* “Well, it’s not technically the law, it is more of an ethical thing but yes, having relatives work together does usually raise some concerns among the brass.”
E: “Right, so I thought I’d just get ahead of that and transfer myself without getting the higher-ups involved. Besides…”
T: “What, baby? What is it?”
E: “I don’t know if I can trust him to be my captain properly. Or Eddie, for that matter.”
T: “Hmm.”
E: “I know it was always our thing, having each other’s back. But recently... I don’t think he’s been having mine. Chim too, if I’m being honest.”
T: “Hmm, well, you’re not wrong. Neither of them have really had your back all that much as of late. And to be very honest, Evan, I don’t even know if Howie is ready to be captain.”
E: “Really? What makes you say that?”
T: “I mean, don’t get me wrong, he’s a great guy and he could definitely get there eventually. But for right now? I think he’s a bit too… I don’t know, impulsive? Immature maybe? I mean, that moment in the rubble that you told me about? That was one moment, where he stepped up to take the lead. It was a good moment, don’t get me wrong, he did amazing, but only one moment nonetheless. I don’t know if he could do that all the time in the field, it’s just not him right now. He could definitely use some more training before he really reaches that.”
E: “Huh, I never really thought about that… But I guess you’re right.”
T: “Anything else on your mind?”
E: “Yeah I.. I think I wanna take the Lieutenants’ Exam…”
T: “Yeah?”
E: “Yeah, I, I think so. I think it’s been a long time coming. I have the most certifications in the entirety of the 118, I know how to lead if I need to, and I… I think Bobby would be proud too.”
T: *smiles* “Yeah baby, I think he’d be very proud of you.”
E: *smiles back*
E: *glances down at Tommy’s lips, and hesitates before slowly starting to lean in*
T: *realises and panics* “Uhm uh, do you, uh, do you want anything specific for dinner?”
E: *pulls back, disappointed* “Oh uhm, no, uh anything is fine.”
T: *stands up to order* “Uhm, uh, Chinese good for you?”
E: “Yeah, sure…”
T: “Great” *turns away quickly and walks away to order food*
E: *looks down, disappointed and embarrassed*
----
The food arrives and the two eat in silence. When they finish, they return to the couch and continue to sit awkwardly in silence.
T: *at the same time* “I’m sorry I-”
E: *at the same time* “I think we should-”
*stare at each other for a second and laugh*
T: “Haha, you go first, Evan.”
E: “Heh, okay… Yeah, I think we should talk. We probably should have talked since that first night but…”
T: “But we both put it off so long that we never did.”
E: “Right.”
T: *sighs* “You’re right, we should talk. And I’ll start, for right now. I am sorry, Evan. Nope, just let me say this. I’m sorry that I walked out on you. Both times. I never should have tried to decide what was best for you when you asked me to move in with you, nor should I have let my insecurities get the best of me and make me say stupid things about stuff I didn’t know about. I’m sorry.”
E: *reaches out to take his hand* “Hey, no. I’m sorry. I jumped the gun, asking you to move in that first time and I understand that you got spooked by that. I get it. And I’m sorry. I just- *sighs* sometimes I say stupid things when I don’t mean to and I just end up Bucking things up every time.” *shoulders slump*
T: “I’m sorry, ‘Bucking things up’?” *eyes wide, staring at Evan incredulously*
E: “Something the guys at the 118 came up with. Basically when I get impulsive and jump the gun or mess things up. Bucking things up.” *shrugs*
T: “Evan, that, that is so rude and disrespectful. That shouldn’t even be a term that exists. What the fuck?”
E: “...”
T: *sighs* “Okay, we’ll table that one for now. You were saying?”
E: “No, no, you- you have a point… *laughs bitterly* You seem to have a lot of those when it comes to how our family treats me all the time. ‘m starting to realise that this may have been a lot more one-sided and toxic than I thought all along…”
T: *laces his fingers with Evan’s* “Hey, we don’t need to get into that right now, if you don’t want to. We can totally come back to it later, or never if you prefer.”
E: “No, I’d really rather not talk about them right now. They’re not the important ones here. We are.”
T: *smiles at him*
E: *smiles back* And hey, no matter what you said about me and Eddie, I never should have lashed out at you the way that I did. I seriously didn’t mean anything I said that morning. At all. I definitely have a lot of feelings for you.”
T: *chuckles*
E: “And besides, you know that I know better than anyone that insecurities are a bitch and a half, and I’d be a hypocrite if I got mad at you for letting them get in the way of things, especially when you consider how we got together in the first place.” *grinning*
T: *laughs* “Hahaha, yeah, you did maim your best friend.” *smiling*
E: *happy that he got him to smile again* “So, I guess we could both say that uh we messed up pretty bad, huh?”
T: “Yeah, I guess so.” *looking sheepish*
E: “So… what now?”
T: “I don’t know. Do…” *hangs his head, but still looks up at Evan* “Do you still wanna try again…? With me?”
E: *smiles fondly* “Yeah?”
T: “Yeah. No big dramatic gestures, no more second guessing each other’s wants, just- just the two of us? Together, working this out slowly as we go along?”
E: *smile softens* “I’d like that.”
T: *smiles even wider* “Yeah?”
E: “Yeah.”
Beat
E: “Think we can try that kiss again?”
T: “Thought you’d never ask.” *Smirk*
They kiss, not passionately, softly, tentatively like they were too scared of breaking the delicate little bubble they’d created. But deep inside, they knew, that nothing on Earth could ever break the bond that they shared or steal, the love that they had for each other.
**The End**