Work Text:
~
"Dear Varian… "
Actually, no. That sounds really stupid.
"Dear Varian...
Dear Diary…
Hi. Hello. I don’t know why I’m greeting you, considering no one’s gonna read this except me. Of course, someone could steal it. Like that lanky, sad excuse of a conman that I have been practically forced to travel with.
Hugo, was his name. He’s such an egotistical little prick, I can’t stand him- which is why I’m currently sitting down.
Ha! I’m so funny, aren’t I?"
…
"No, I’m not going crazy. Sure, I may be running on <2 hours of sleep, but I’m complefy completely fine!"
That misspell was not doing me any justice.
"Anyway, speaking of Hugo, have I told you about how terribly snarky he is? And flirty. And tall. And… hot."
Um. Why did I write that? My brain always works against me. I swear, I don’t actually feel that way about him. Why would I? He’s an annoying jerk who doesn’t have any regard for-
“Hey, Goggles.” Speak of the devil.
“Whatcha writing about?” I yelped, whipped around towards him, and dropped the quill on the paper all in rapid succession.
“What- oh- um- hi, hey there- hello- Hugo!” My brain took a few moments to actually process his question. “It’s- um- nothing. Nothing that concerns you. Why does it matter t- why are you- it’s.. none of your business!”
Wow. That was pathetic. Hugo apparently thought so too. He let out a harsh laugh. “Yeah. Real convincing, Hairstripe. Tell me. Were you writing about… hm, I don’t know… maybe… me?”
I choked on my spit. “What- no! Of course not! Why would I be writing about you, of all people?” I stood up and faced him.
Hugo raised an eyebrow, presumably at my extreme nervousness. “Oh, I don’t know, Bluebird, maybe ‘cause I’ve seen the way you stare at me when you think I’m not looking?” He snaps his fingers. “Ooh, wait. Is this some sort of- sex letter?"
I could feel my face heating up more and more by each word that came out of this boy’s mouth. “I- WHAT?? Why- would you-“
“You don’t need to lie to me, Vee. I won’t judge.” Hugo- that smug bastard, said, smile growing wider by each spluttering attempt at a sentence I tried to make.
“I’m- I’m not writing a fucking sex letter, Hugo!” My voice went up about 2 octaves in the span of those 9 words.
“Well, enlighten me, Sweetcheeks.” Hugo tilted his head. “You usually don’t get this riled up at my teasing. What’s botherin’ ya?”
“I’m fine, Hugo. It’s nothing. I’m fine.” See, that wasn’t true. I was literally having an epiphany- apparently I like guys now? I don’t really know.
He walked closer- no, please don’t- He put his hand on my shoulder. I could practically feel my ears turning pink, too. He was right. Why was I getting this affected? Wait-
No. NO. Nononononono…
It can’t be.
No way.
Hugo?
Nope.
Nah.
Nein.
Why, why of all people, did my brain decide it… liked Hugo!?
“Hm. I don’ know about that, Goggles. You look pretty red. You sure there’s absolutely nothing on your mind?” His voice lowered to a purr-like quality. Seriously, was he trying to seduce me or something?
“Are you fliRTING WITH ME?”
Darn you, mouth. I didn’t mean for that to come out! I swear, I’m usually a lot more composed than this. But it seems that whenever Hugo’s around, my brain’s wiring changes. I’ve yet to test that. Maybe I should run a few… experiments. Just, testing out a few variables, as one might say.
“Sorry, I mean- I didn’t mean to-“
Hugo shook his head. “No, Blue. Stop apologizing for literally everything. It’s fucking stupid. And annoying.” Yeah. Like he wasn’t, himself. “To answer your question, I thought I was being subtle?” Ugh. That bastard.
“Yeah, totally.” I grab the quill off of the paper and close the book. I let out a sigh.
“Have you ever felt like… gods, this sounds so dumb-“
“I don’t care, Var. You can ask.” Whoa. When did he get so serious? He took both my hands into his- wait- were mine sweaty? Shit. I should’ve wiped them off before. But I didn’t know he was going to be here, actually. In fact, I’m probably making them more sweaty right now just thinking about it.
Stop. Ground yourself, Varian. Your hands are completely dry.
“Okay. Uh, have you, um, felt like you might like… more than the gender opposite of yours…?” Hugo stood still for a moment.
“Huh? You mean- like… are you telling me-”
“Just answer the question, idiot.”
“Don’t tell me what to do. Yeah, I have. I do, actually. I’m pansexual.”
Um. EXCUSE ME??
Why- how did he just say that so- casually..?
Well. I guess that’s good to know.
“Oh. I guess you’re pretty experienced then. Do you know what, um, the word is for when you like both boys and girls?” I asked as he rubbed circles into my knuckles.
“..I’m going to ignore the first part of that.. But, that would be bisexual. I assume this is your ‘coming out’ to me?”
“I guess so.”
“Interesting. What made you realize this now?” Oh no. I see that dumb smarmy smile worming its way back onto his face. I pushed him away and crossed my arms.
“I-I don’t know. I was just thinking-”
“Oh, so now you admit you were writing about me.”
I rolled my eyes. Damn it. I could feel my face start burning again.
“Fine! Yes, okay? I was writing about you, what’s the big deal??”
I could practically hear the gears turning in that incredibly- stupidly- smart brain of his.
“Ahhh. I see what’s going on here. You like me, don’tcha?” I know it was pretty obvious that he was right by now, but might as well try to save just a sliver of my dignity.
“NO- what- why would I-”
He made his way back over to me. “Y’know, it’s kinda adorable how embarrassed you get at literally everything. Very endearing.”
“I’m not-”
“Trust me, Sweetcheeks. You’re not fooling me. Let go.”
“I-”
And then he kissed me.
Wait.
HE KISSED ME!!
OHHHH my gods…
I think I might pass out.
Hugo’s kissing me! Oh shit, I gotta kiss back.
I vaguely feel his hands on my hips, so I sling my arms around his neck. I decide to part my mouth to allow more access and we get impossibly closer and I feel my hands in his hair and-
“VARIAN!! We need your help with som-” …
I jump back from Hugo to see Nuru standing in the doorway.
“I- uh- hi, Nuru! We were just- um-” I turn to Hugo to see if he would help me out. He looks completely indifferent. Bitch.
Nuru smirked. “Yeah, I don’t think I need an explanation. You two carry on. Yong and I can wait.” She closes the door back.
…
“So, are we gonna keep-”
“NO!”
We ended up continuing anyway, against my own better judgment.
"Dear Diary...
I guess Hugo isn't as bad as I was saying earlier. He's a damn good kisser."
~