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Eddie’s not entirely sure how it happens.
Realising he’s in love with Buck, that is.
Okay, that’s a lie, he’s a little bit in the know.
One minute, he’s shooting the rope gun, praying he hits his mark and doesn’t accidentally kill Buck in the process. The next, Buck’s flying through the air—dust billowing behind him as the building collapses in his wake—and Eddie can’t take his eyes off of him.
He remembers Buck’s words when he’d radioed; Where are you?
And his own response; Right in front of you.
And truer words have never been spoken, because Eddie’s suddenly very much aware that Buck has in fact been right in front of him for god knows how long. And now that he’s realised, well… he really can’t seem to take his eyes off of Buck.
Because Buck’s gorgeous—even covered in soot and sweat and god knows what else from the day’s efforts—and Eddie’s genuinely not sure how he’s never noticed it before. His heart races. and he’s sure if he could see his own face his cheeks would be flushed and his pupils would be double their normal size.
Buck’s arms grip the zip line firmly as he flies through the air and Eddie can’t help but imagine those arms carrying him with ease. He imagines Buck lifting him onto their kitchen counter and—and he freezes—because Buck’s coming towards him at an alarming speed, and maybe if he hadn’t been so distracted by indecent thoughts about his best friend he might have had time to move out of the way.
As it is, Eddie’s eyes widen to match Buck’s as they collide.
He grunts as Buck’s legs wrap around his waist upon impact, and he immediately throws his arms around Buck in an attempt to steady him. Unfortunately, all he succeeds in doing is ensuring they move together as one as he’s lifted into the air to join Buck on the zip line.
It only takes a few seconds before they finally come to a stop—slamming up against the side of the vehicle he’d used earlier as an anchor point—and Eddie exhales shakily as he continues to cling to Buck.
He knows he should let go—loosen the grip his legs have around Buck’s waist—but he really doesn’t want to. Instead, he leans forward, resting his head on Buck’s chest just for a moment, and he feels one of Buck’s arms wrap around his back in response.
And he might have missed it—if he weren’t so tuned into Buck’s presence right now—but he feels the soft press of Buck’s lips to the top of his head. Eddie squeezes Buck even tighter.
“Eddie, what’s wrong?” he hears Buck say directly into his ear. “Are you hurt?”
Eddie notices then that he’s shaking, and his face is—his face is wet. He thinks he might be crying. Fuck, this is so embarrassing.
“I thought you were going to die over there,” Eddie finds himself admitting. “I was—I was so fucking scared.”
Buck’s breathing hitches in his chest, and Eddie feels it because he still can’t bring himself to let Buck go; he clings to Buck even tighter, if anything.
“Hey, you saved me, I promise. I’m fine.” Buck’s hand shifts to hold Eddie’s head in place, kissing his temple this time. “Everything’s gonna be okay.”
For the first time since he heard the news about Bobby, Eddie believes those words. He lets himself sink into Buck, intending on holding him for as long as he can get away with it, but they’re interrupted.
“Dude,” Ravi exclaims, clapping Eddie on the shoulder. “That was genius, man. How’d you even think of that?”
Eddie chuckles wetly, discreetly wiping at his face and clearing his throat before he responds.
“Well,” he says, voice all bravado. “I thought if Bobby were here, what kind of crazy stunt would he be yelling at Buck for pulling?”
Buck laughs, smiling at Eddie like he’s the centre of the universe. “No, this one was all you.”
Eddie smiles up at Buck, resisting the urge to wipe the dirt off of Buck’s face with his probably equally dirty hands. Buck smiles right back at him, and everyone else disappears again. He’s so—
“Uh, guys?” Ravi’s voice draws their attention, and they simultaneously look over to see Ravi staring at them with a raised eyebrow. “Do you need a hand?”
Eddie’s not entirely sure what Ravi’s referring to at first, at least not until he feels Buck’s legs unwrapping themselves from around his waist. Buck lands awkwardly—probably because Eddie makes no move to loosen his arms from around Buck’s torso—but it’s no matter. Eddie steadies him, making sure he’s got his footing before slowly letting his arms fall back to his sides.
“I think we’re good,” Buck says to Ravi, still very much only looking at Eddie.
Eddie looks right back. “Yeah, we’re good,” he confirms.
Better than good.
He feels like he’s finally figured it all out.
*
Later that night, after they’ve showered and ordered pizza, Eddie finds himself thinking about it again. He watches Buck as he shovels his seventh slice of pizza into his mouth—Chris doing the same with his third—and wonders how he didn’t realise sooner just how much of an impact Buck has had on their lives in the smallest and biggest of ways.
Buck’s so great with Chris, and he’s always there for them both. Eddie’s pretty sure he’s never had anybody in his life who loves his kid as much as he does.
It hits Eddie rather suddenly that he’s pretty sure Buck loves him as well.
He’s pretty sure he’s in love with Buck, though. It’s the only thing that makes sense. But he’s not entirely sure what to do with that, considering the fact that he’s straight.
Maybe he’s not as straight as he’s always thought?
He glances over at Buck again—revisiting thoughts that briefly crossed his mind as Buck was flying towards him on the zip line—admiring his six foot whatever existence, his gorgeous blue eyes, his muscular arms that really could easily lift him and place him on his kitchen counter, his perfectly plump lips that must have been made for the sole purpose of kissing the life out of him as soon as possible, actually, and—
Yeah, okay, probably gay.
Well, at least he’s got that figured out.
Eddie sighs. Now he just needs to figure out how to tell Buck he’s—
“Not tonight, Chris,” he hears Buck say, and finds himself pulled back into the conversation going on around him. “Your dad and I are pretty exhausted after everything. But maybe you can have an extra hour on your Playstation before bed.”
Chris perks up at that. “Really?”
Buck looks to him, and Eddie’s completely lost as to why.
“Is that okay?” Buck asks. “With you, I mean?”
Oh. Buck’s not actually Chris’s parent. Right.
Eddie clears his throat. “Of course, just make sure you keep it down so we can get some sleep. I’m gonna take the couch tonight so Buck can—”
“What?” Buck interrupts. “No way, man. I’m not taking your bed.”
“Technically it’s your bed,” Eddie points out. “But either way. There’s no way you’re sleeping on this couch tonight. You’ve got another shift tomorrow; I’m not officially reinstated yet.”
“Absolutely not,” Buck starts. “This is—”
“Why don’t you just share the bed?” Chris suggests, as if the solution is that simple. “You both get a good night’s sleep and I don’t have to listen to you fight about it. Everybody wins.”
Eddie looks at Buck.
Buck looks at him.
“It’s not—” Buck starts, but Eddie knows what he’s going to say.
“That’s a great idea,” he interjects, before Buck has a chance to say otherwise. “Don’t know why we didn’t think to share sooner.”
Chris’ voice is dry in his response. “Probably because adults like to make things more complicated than they need to be.”
Ain’t that the truth.
*
“Are you sure you’re okay with this?”
Eddie rolls his eyes even though he knows Buck won’t see it because he’s facing away from him.
“Yep,” he says, tugging his shirt off and tossing it into his laundry hamper. “You good?”
“What?” Buck sounds weird, and Eddie turns to see him frozen with his shirt half off. “Why wouldn’t I be good? I’m great. Perfect, even.”
“Uh huh, you sound completely fine,” Eddie says, pulling back the blanket and climbing into bed. “You coming to bed?”
He’s pretty sure he sees Buck’s cheeks flush, but he must be imagining things.
“Right, yeah, I, uh—” Buck stumbles over his words as he throws his shirt into Eddie’s hamper. “I’m coming.”
Buck pulls the blanket back on his side of the bed, and Eddie raises an eyebrow. “You aren’t gonna take your pants off?”
Buck’s head snaps up to look at Eddie, and he gapes at him before questioning, “You want me to take my pants off?”
“Yes?” Eddie’s brow furrows. “You can’t wear jeans in bed, man. That’s just weird.”
Buck looks down, frowning at his jeans. “Right.”
Eddie watches as Buck kicks his jeans off, picking them up off the floor and folding them before placing them on top of the chest of drawers in the corner. Buck joins him in bed after that, awkwardly lying flat on his back and refusing to make eye contact.
Eddie rolls onto his side, facing Buck.
“You’re acting weird,” he points out, and Buck finally looks at him. “Do you want me to go sleep on the couch? I can—”
“No!” Buck insists. “No, don’t be ridiculous. I just—it was weird today, right?”
“You wanna do this now?” Eddie glances at his watch. “You’ve gotta be up in—”
“I don’t really care,” Buck says, rolling onto his side to face Eddie. “I want to talk about what happened today.”
Eddie nods to himself for a moment. “Okay, where do we start?”
“That’s it? It’s that simple?”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” Eddie jokes. “Did you want me to argue? Because I can—”
“Jesus christ. No,” Buck responds, dragging a hand through his hair. “Look, I just want to apologise. Emotions were high, and I was really relieved to see you because I thought you were on your way to Texas, and then you were right in front of me but you were crying and I didn’t know what to do to make it better, and for some stupid reason I kissed you and you let me and I just need to know I didn’t make things weird.” Buck takes a deep breath before hurriedly adding, “And I promise not to do it again.”
Eddie’s sure his face must be screaming his confusion, but it probably can’t hurt to voice it out loud. “Why would you promise not to do it again?”
“Well, I—”
“What if I want you to kiss me again?” Eddie asks bravely, meeting Buck’s eyes. “What if I liked it?”
Buck’s eyes widen. “You liked it?”
“It was nice,” Eddie shrugged. “I didn’t hate it.”
That’s an understatement, but Buck doesn’t need to know that.
“You want me to kiss you again?” Buck asks slowly. “Really?”
“I think you should kiss me now, in fact,” Eddie suggests, shuffling closer to Buck.
Buck’s breath audibly catches. “Um, okay?”
Eddie’s heart races as Buck shifts closer.
His eyes close as he feels Buck’s breath puff against his cheek.
Buck kisses his temple.
And Eddie’s… disappointed.
“Did that help?” Buck asks, as he shifts back slightly.
Eddie frowns. “Help with what?”
“I don’t know,” Buck breathes exasperatedly. “You’re the one who wanted me to kiss you again. I thought you were still upset about today or something and needed comfort or—”
“You’re an idiot,” Eddie says plainly, shutting Buck up. “That’s not why I wanted you to kiss me.”
“Then why did you—”
Eddie closes the distance between them and presses his lips to Buck’s for a split second to make his point before pulling back.
“That’s what I meant when I said you should kiss me,” Eddie states, heart racing. Buck doesn’t say anything. “Was that okay?” he asks, hoping he hasn’t fucked up massively.
“You just kissed me.”
Buck looks like he’s in shock.
Eddie smiles, hopeful. “I did.”
“You kissed me,” Buck repeats, the astonishment clear in his tone.
“I know,” Eddie says. “I was there.”
“Are we kissing now?” Buck asks incredulously. “Is that a thing we’re doing?”
“Depends,” Eddie says, shrugging. “Do you want us to be kissing now?”
“Eddie,” Buck groans, and Eddie huffs out a laugh.
“Okay, okay.” Eddie takes a deep breath. All or nothing, he figures. “I’m in love with you.”
“You’re in love with me?" Buck chokes out. “Since when?”
“Years, probably,” Eddie says thoughtfully. “But if you’re asking when I realised”—Eddie pauses to do the math—“then I’d say seven hours, give or take?”
“Eddie!”
“What?” Eddie says through a laugh. “I’m sure I would have realised sooner if I’d known I was gay! But I only figured that out after I realised I was in love with you, so”—he waves his hand around in between them—“here we are.”
“God, you’re so—” Buck cuts himself off, shaking his head with a grin on his face. “I can’t believe I’m in love with an insane person.”
Eddie grins, ignoring the latter half of Buck’s statement. “You love me?”
Buck rolls his eyes. “Yeah, dude. Obviously.”
“Obviously, he says.” Eddie does not in fact agree with Buck’s claim. “When did you figure it out, then?”
“Uh…” Buck flushes, and Eddie holds his breath. “Seven hours? Give or take?”
There’s silence for a moment, before Eddie bursts out laughing. Buck joins him almost immediately.
“I didn’t know I was into guys,” Eddie manages to get out through his laughter. “What’s your excuse?”
Buck groans. “Up until a few minutes ago, you were my straight best friend.”
“And?” Eddie asks incredulously. “So what?”
“I didn’t wanna be that guy!” Buck insists. “You know; bisexual guy who’s hopelessly pining for his straight best friend?”
Eddie narrows his eyes. “Oh, so straight me wasn’t good enough for you? Ouch.”
Buck chokes on air.
“That is not what I said,” Buck insists, pointing a finger at Eddie. “You’re such a—”
Eddie kisses Buck, cutting him off with ease.
Buck pulls him closer immediately, and Eddie lets him, tossing a leg over Buck’s thigh and entwining their legs. He can feel Buck pressed up against him from head to toe, and warmth courses through his body in an instant.
He moans softly, attempting to deepen the kiss, but Buck pulls back.
“I can’t believe I’m about to say this,” Buck groans. “But I’m exhausted.”
A fair point; Eddie’s also feeling pretty exhausted now that he thinks about it.
“Me too,” he admits, pressing a kiss to Buck’s birthmark. “Besides, there’s no rush. We’ve got all the time in the world.”
“We’ll take it slow,” Buck says, nuzzling Eddie’s nose and sneaking a quick kiss. “We’ll make sure we do this right.”
Eddie smiles softly. “Yeah, that sounds perfect.”