Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Both of them sat on the sand by the lake, tucked under a tree to shade themselves from the pouring rain. The festival had been delayed by the downpour, leaving this Saturday limbo they were filling together. Given what had transpired last night they were both feeling some relief at the room to breathe. The comfortable silence spun between them until Susie continued, "You never thought about talking to it? Like, not once."

Kris grimaced. The thought alone repulsed them. This .. parasite... Living within them, pulling their strings and voyeuristically picking at their thoughts. Kris didn't want to talk to it. Kris had to live with it, not befriend it. If anything, it was the one time that they were in a semblance of control was denying it information. To refuse to elaborate. Pointing into the distance to sabotage it, inspecting something with their eyes squeezed tight, feeling the dizzying catharsis of beating it over and over and over with a hockey stick to keep it from the codes.

"Geez, don't look so hateful." Susie nudged their arm, seeing the simmering way they stared at the water, "I know you don't like the thing but... I mean, it couldn't hurt at this point. Might make you feel better." She suggested.

Kris leaned forward, elbows on their knees, lost in thought. "It can't hear me" they stoically replied, "It just gets the gist of what I say and think.."

Susie scratched the back of her head, humming, "Maybe I can talk t-"

"No!" Kris exclaimed, hair whipping as they turned to face her, "No, no.. I don't want.. uh"

Kris did not want Susie to talk to it. No, it went deeper than that. The thought of Susie talking *through* them to the SOUL filled them with a burning, crawling self hatred they couldn't analyze any deeper without going insane.

"Sorry, I'm sorry. I yelled at you. I didn't mean to."

They were both taken back by the reaction, Kris rubbing their face with wet hands. Susie managed to take it in stride, "Dude it's fine, don't worry 'bout it. You're sensitive, I get it." She watched the trees shake with the wind as she thought, pushing away the shock of them shouting at her, "What if... You ask it questions through me? Hear me out. You ask me something and I ask it."

Huh. That was really smart. Kris leaned back during consideration. It didn't inspire the same feelings, that was certain. The only issue that was at the forefront of their brain was that they were unsure what the SOUL would reveal. What did it know? What secrets would it gleefully share? What had it seen?

If it was malicious. But it felt malicious. It made pacifist choices, obviously. But Kris knew from countless sessions of therapy that failing to do violence was not the same as kindness, the same way *wanting* to do violence didn't make someone unkind. It was a passive sort of malicious, they decided, someone who would do something cruel eventually, when they wanted. The way it pulled up the shadowy, cruel thoughts Kris had and presented it before them like a genuine choice rather than something to acknowledge and shun. Call Onion-San disgusting. Tell Ralsei to... They weren't even slightly prepared to think of what would have... But, despite their fears, they knew that Susie was right. If making it through a normal conversation didn't have to feel like exhausting tug of war between Kris and the Silent Watcher it would be a tremendous relief. Really, with their new push towards being honest and changing fate, maybe it was the only option?

"... Okay." Kris sighed, "I'm down to try it. But... If something weird happens you have to promise you'll dip."

"What, like it tells me your internet habits? Maybe...overdue library books?"

Kris laughed, prompting a huge toothy smile from Susie, "Yeah, alright, I promise."

---

They went back to their bedroom, where the SOUL was futilely pushing against the thin brassy bars of the birdcage. Susie wouldn't admit it but it made her feel sort of sorry for it. The way it moved made it look like the sad Walmart betta fish, cramped and claustrophobic.

But, she reasoned, it was only doing that because it wasn't occupying Kris. Controlling them. That made her empathy cool significantly.

"Okay, what do I ask it?"

"Ask it why it sucks ass at dodging."

Susie smirked, "Oh yeah? Hey bud, I never blamed you for eating spades but it's nice to know that even soul magic alien things suck at getting out of the way." She leaned forward, crouching in front of the SOUL, using a smoky, intimidating tone, "Okay, pal. My friend here wants to talk to you. You good with that?"

It stopped budging against the bars and floated in place, glowing benignly. They waited. It floated. She cleared her throat.

"Kris. Uhh... It doesn't talk, huh?"

Kris was compressing the spring of the knife in their pocket, already on edge. ".... Huh. I guess not... I never knew for sure."

"Well, let's figure something out. Let's take it to Castle town."

Kris hesitated. They felt like vomiting. "I... Need it... To go there."

Susie softened, "That's fine, it'll be.. heh, it'll be like after church." Both of them shared a tender look, smiling stupidly. That night, hell, the day was... Everything. Tragic, enlightening, soft. Getting to know her and Ralsei, being back at Noelle's without the cloud of grief over them... Then meeting Susie back at their castle town bedrooms and the revelation of the SOUL, building their trust, being vulnerable. It was incredible. In an exhausting way. But, still. It was obvious the warmth and safety of that night was the eye of the storm, a tranquility preceding chaos. But the goofy smile Susie was shooting them brought them some resolve to carry through with what she was proposing.

"...." Susie had her lips pressed together, eyes narrow as she looked at it. "Hey Kris? Can I put it back in?"

Kris balked, "You freaked out last night when I-"

"Dude because you slammed that bitch in like you were doing the Heimlich." She sighed when she saw Kris' expression shift, not aloof exactly but like she didn't understand. She knew they were being weird and sensitive about it. And she wanted to meet them where they were but her strengths were mostly in thrashing and not comfort, "Please, lemme try it."

Kris swallowed, "Okay."

Susie opened the bird cage and grabbed the SOUL with both hands, holding it like a cross between holy sacrament and a dead bird. "Doesn't hurt when it's out like it does in the Dark world. Can you feel it still?"

They shifted their hair back in front of their face to hide how red they were getting. It was such a heinous ritual, yet she seemed oblivious to that, engaging without judgement. Even her questions were genuine curiosity without any lining of pity. "Kinda. But far away, if that makes sense."

Susie slid her hand onto Kris' sternum and felt her breath quicken at the feeling of their thundering heart. It was a little weird, but.. a different kind of weird than it was at Castletown. This had an undertone to it now that made her face a little ruddier than otherwise, even if it was in the context of returning a magical-otherworldly-mystery-entity into their body to pilot them.

"You know there's easier ways to get me to take off my shirt, right?"

"CAN IT, DUMBASS." She turned her head away from where she had been staring at her hand on their shirt, half expecting Kris' heartbeat to pop out of the back of her hand. She was just thinking about how cool it was that their heart was full of blood, nothing else, obviously. Human hearts beat so much harder than a monsters. Their bodies were packed with blood and water or something. She brought the SOUL up to Kris and held her breath, watching it slide through the fabric and off of her hand. Slippery, smoother than glass and cool to the touch it almost glided from her palm into Kris' Chest, melting into layers of clothing, fascia and bones until it was invisible resting in their chest.

Kris threw their head forward, grimacing as the SOUL settled back in control. Susie was up close to the process now. She had never noticed the calm that fell over their face, the almost serene coldness of their movement. She promised to not treat Kris any differently, so any thoughts of discomfort she put in the shredder.

"See? You don't have to pull a Mortal Kombat every time." She said, lopsided smile on her cooling face, "You good?"

"Yes." Kris said, nodding. They still looked nervous, but the moment had left them with a kind of determination now. She had seen them at their most authentic and their weakest and was refusing to turn away. That meant something.

Chapter Text

Susie held the door of the Dark world open, and before they jumped, Kris hesitated.

"What?" Susie asked, looking back at them.

Perfect. They needed a gap to be able to speak. One of the weird rules of being controlled was that they could never choose to speak first, "Hey. Don't tell Ralsei." Susie nodded in understanding. Then they jumped, taking her hand and leading her in with them.

They landed peacefully onto the shifting black ground, revitalized. It felt good to see that after the Titan and the sheer chaos of yesterday that Castle Town was still bustling in its normal rhythm. They still hadn't taken their recruits from the church, but after the festival Susie was sure that they would be seeing the cuptains swarming the watercooler and Jackenstein helping the Swatches dust. But in the meantime..

"Where's Ralsei?" Susie asked. They had never really entered castle town without Ralsei eagerly awaiting them.

Kris frowned. They were wondering the same thing, "...Maybe, hopefully he's decorating his room. Maybe he's learning to be selfish like we said." The sound of Ralsei's sobs in their ear were still fresh, Kris could almost feel his wet fur as they squeezed him. It was so horrible, worse than a nightmare the way the memory rolled and crashed into them like thunder... but they knew from experience the exhaustion that comes from a breakdown like Ralsei had. Ralsei didn't sleep, but he was surely feeling exhausted. Maybe he was somewhere with his head on a pillow, having his first dream.

Susie's face darkened, unconvinced. "Yeah, maybe." She was leading the way this time, guiding them both into the castle. Trying not to think about seeing him sob or her blood wicking into his white fur Susie navigated to her room. When she swung the door open, her eyes widened in shock.

"Found him" She snickered, grinning sharply as she thumbed into her room.

On top of Susie's fanged bed was Ralsei. Like a swaddled child he was curled into her black comforter with just his face and horns exposed. Tucked between layers of blankets and sheets and rumpled pillows, his glasses were precariously half on one horn and half dangling in front of his nose. Despite this, he looked... Peaceful. Mouth open and drooling on her pillow, completely unaware of the lightners or the careful posing of his body. Selfish. Just like he should be, Kris thought. The SOUL pushed them forward and they obeyed with only an unseen frown of protest. Going to the sleeping monster and carefully sliding his glasses off his face, they folded them and hung them on the black spikes that protruded from Susie's bedframe.

Kris smirked, watching for just a second longer before they stood up. Good. Have a nice dream. Chill out. It felt like they had grown closer, just seeing him so genuinely unarmed and actually trying to become his own person. They backed out of the room and Susie gently closed the door.

"Ain't he a cutie? Picking my bed to drool on though. Yeah, I'm for sure gonna dog him for it."

Kris laughed, "You drool too."

She pushed them on the shoulder, "No, I don't! You're full of it."

"You also snore like a bull dog. Like you're moving furniture."

"Kris! I'm gonna kick your ass for lying! I'll bite your f..." Her eyes widened, "uh.. haha..!" Kris' dizzy, surprised smile at her threat brought her back to the night before, and she was so suddenly derailed that she had no appetite for whatever it was she had been talking about. She still couldn't believe they had kissed her. It felt like a dream more than a memory, "Whatever! Eyes on the mission!" She pulled them back into their room and whipped the door closed.

She had her sharky smile on, turning to Kris and staring at the chest plate that hid their SOUL. "Okay.. Come out, We gotta talk."

"I'm nonbinary." Kris answered serenely.

"NOT... OH MY GOD. Work with me Kris!" She palmed her face, a growling smile hiding under her fingertips, "You can't chicken out!"

They had hoped they could banter a little longer to stall, but Susie was determined and Kris knew that there was no escape when she was ready like this.

They tried, then retried, then retried to pull their SOUL out by quickly reaching and grabbing. It was hard to do in normal circumstances. The inherent violence of what they needed to do to get it to work was easy, but they needed the right headspace to do it. Especially since the SOUL was stubbornly stagnant in their ribs. Almost like it was goading them into showing Susie how they really do it, hunched over and screaming and baring their teeth. Absolutely not.

Susie watched Kris struggle until it became apparent they needed a hand. Cautiously, she put her hand over Kris' wrist and knuckles, unknowingly interrupting the internal war they were fighting. "Here, it worked last night so..." She mumbled. This time it was her that guided Kris' hand to proceed. And their hand did, until they felt it on their fingertips. This was usually the crescendo of their rage and resentment, ripping it out and throwing it mercilessly wherever it would be contained. With her hand over theirs, though.. It wasn't the same. It wasn't pleasant per se, but it felt more like a pulling a loose tooth. Gross but fascinating.

"Okay, pull." Kris said in a whisper, feeling the SOUL trying to escape, its corporeal state almost liquid in their palm. She listened, pulling their hand back until the SOUL slipped out. Susie noticed that Kris did *not* hold it like a dead bird. They held it like the emergency stop lever of an out of control rollercoaster, with their blue knuckles pale at the force. It looked like a stress ball.

"Dude that has to hu-" She watched Kris spike into the wall, where it slid onto the bed. "Dude!! Doesn't that hurt!?"

"Not me." Kris said, a half joking truth in a stoic tone. Susie paled at the answer. She underestimated how intense they felt about.. anything. Let alone the intense disdain they had towards what looked like a harmless ball of light.

"Okay.. Heh, well. Let's test it out." She said nervously, "Yo! Queen of hearts! Can you talk?" She watched with pursed lips as it floated towards Kris and stopped at the edge of the bed, clipping through it slightly with its 'tail'.

"Guess not." Kris sighed. "Can it.. I dunno, write?"

"Okay, can you like, spell?" Susie asked it, unknowingly adopting the tone of a frustrated pool attendant talking to a lost child.

A pause. Then, it jerked up and down in stiff movements, a crude nod of agreement. Kris' mouth fell open. Oh? It really just answered? It was really playing along?

Susie was stoked, "Yo! That's awesome. Let's get it a pencil or something."

Kris held their sword up, "Pencil.." They reminded her. Her face twisted up. Right. That pencil from Noelle's desk was now a sword with a sticky candy cane handle. So no pencil. "Also it doesn't have hands."

"Okay hold on let's think."

"Keyboard? I think a keyboard would work?" Kris suggested. It could do weird stuff with electronics, that they knew from the starving Santa statuettes it would activate.

"Okay! Right. I can borrow Alphys's keyboard. Or, wait, that'll come to life... Oh! Shit, let's ask Queen."

Despite their anxiety, Susie's enthusiasm was infectious. This was ultimately just another puzzle, wasn't it? "Good plan. Let's make sure we keep it on the downlow." They hesitated for a second before taking a trophy from their bedroom wall and putting it over the SOUL like a trapped cockroach, stacking the heavy manual on top of it.

Susie narrowed her eyes at the familiarity until it hit her. Oh my god it was the mouse from Noelle's house. That bastard.... She understood their animosity a little better.

They followed Susie as she thundered up the stairs, swinging open Queen's door. Her room had changed again since yesterday. Now it had a bar placed between the speaker, the LED display on the front panel displaying a pixelated fishtank partially obscured by sleeping Werewires on barstools. Queen sat on the bartop, a green martini glass beside her and her legs spread out like a day at the beach.

"Kris Susie How Do You Like My New Bar" She gestured grandly, "It Can Play: Bad Apple (Classic)"

"Bad.. Apple?" Susie asked.

"I'll show you later" Kris assured her.

"I Doubt You're Here For The Nutritious Bevvies" She had a wide smile, "Also The_Old Next Door Is Very Cool. He Has Family Guy (Vintage)."

Kris smirked. Of course Tenna was already making waves with the other electronics. "Do you have a keyboard we can borrow?"

Her cyan lips pursed as she thought, "Dude What Do You Think I Am Literally A Computer LMAO" She took a long pull from her glass and slammed it down, "Okay Light Nerds Check Out: This" Her visor glowed for a brief moment before a keyboard, much like the AGREE2ALL puzzle in appearance, but slightly smaller and on a frame like the keyboard in their Search History Dungeons appeared before them. "Am I The Most Benevolent Deposed Monarch Or What?"

Susie attempted to hoist it onto her shoulder, roaring until Kris moved down to the other end and lifted it with her like an especially clunky Ikea box. "Thanks!"

--
Navigating it down the stairs was annoying, but honestly the longer they were struggling with recreating the scene from Friends the longer Kris could delay the inevitable. What to ask it. What did it want? What was it? Why choose Kris? Why did it suck ass at dodging? Why was it SO insistent on talking to everybody, all the time? Why... Why did it sometimes feel familiar?

Susie kicked open Kris' door, only to quickly lunge and catch it with the toe of her boot before it slammed against the wall, "Shit, Shit, Shit I don't wanna wake up Ralsei."

They both placed they keyboard onto the ground and positioned it carefully in front of the overturned trophy before Kris lifted it up. "Uh... Tell it that we need it to type." They said. Susie could feel their anxiety in their voice. It was still monotone, but there was the smallest shake in their cadence.

"Okay, you gotta type. First question..." She turned to Kris, who stood close beside her, if not slightly in front of her. It was Out. It was Loose.

It.. Was typing?

Chapter Text

Kris was in front of Susie, their tense stance reminding her of when they acted as her shield in battle. The fact that Kris was so on guard around the little red shape when they were capable of scaling a titan with less than a grimace wasn't lost on her. Maybe it wasn't harmless. But in Noelle's house, what had it done other than terrify them into thinking a rat or severed hand was loose? Despite that, she was inclined to trust Kris. If not for them, the statue of the Old Man would have thrashed her into pieces due to her being tricked by it. This may be no different.

" H " Its semi- corporeal form slid down onto the key until it compressed enough to trigger the robotic voice.
" E"
"L"
"L"
"O"
" : "
" ) "

Kris' jaw hung open. It didn't feel right. The SOUL and Kris were, during their best moments, uneasy and temporary allies. It forced them to pick at old wound, dug its fingers into their friend's brains to read their thoughts, guided them like a dog. The SOUL saw them as the Cage With Human SOUL And Parts. Why did it have the audacity to greet them like that, so violating in its overfamiliarity. They had the thought of crushing it.

"Woah! It actually said something. I kinda didn't think this would work! Hey, What do you want to ask it?" Susie's face fell when she saw Kris' expression. They looked somewhere between disgust and offense. Right.

"Ask it.. Ugh. I don't know." Kris groaned, rubbing their hands through their ocean hair. "I hate this already. I don't know."

Susie sighed, smiling gently at them. "Hey, it's alright man. We'll start off with obvious stuff. Everything is cool. Here, I'll take over, be the lead interro-gator"

She crouched down to get closer to it, balancing her body on her heels. Kris, despite their sprouting panic, noticed that she looked like a tripod webcam with the way her tail stabilized her by squishing onto the floor and she hunched over to look at it closer.

"Hey, SOUL! What are you?" It was the first question that popped in her head. Kris cautiously knelt beside her, still positioned in a way that made them look ready to pounce.

"A. N. G. E. L." As the SOUL navigated the keyboard it began moving faster, almost as if it had calibrated itself to moving key-to-key.

Kris perked up, "What? Did it say that?"

Susie was wide eyed, nodding, "You're an angel? Like from the prophecy?"

Kris was sure they heard something different. They thought they heard it say 'Human', softer than a whisper at the same time. Two voices.

"YES. PROPHECY."

Susie knit her eyebrows together, shoulders hunched, looking next to her at her friend. She concealed her mouth from the SOUL with her scabbed hand, leaning into Kris, close enough that they could feel the heat coming off of her snout and whispered. "Hey. Good new for you, huh? You banish it, don't ya?"

Kris felt the world quiet as Susie pulled back with a knowing smile. That was right, Kris wasn't even thinking about that. 'The Angel, Banished, Will Meet With Its Desire.' Banished... Freedom was dawning on the horizon, if every thing went well. They knew then that they only had until the end of the week.

"What's the desire, then? That's the other half of the prophecy."

Susie was quick to ask, "Okay, Angel, what's your desire then?"

"MISSING VESSEL."

Susie and Kris shared an uneasy glance, unsure of what it meant. It seemed to sense that, as it continued, "THE BODY"

Kris was picking at their nails, face darkened. Did the SOUL think of them as its body? Did it call them a vessel too? Did it see nothing more than skin and bone to pour their will into?

"If you get that, will you leave Kris alone?" Susie asked. Kris' hair was curtaining her from seeing their expression of red-faced surprise at the quickness she parried the answer with.

"CAGE?"

Kris looked up. Was it antagonizing them? It felt like it. Calling them the cage.. "I'm gonna bash it to pieces."

"TRAPPED BY CAGE"

"You are NOT trapped!" Kris exploded, half lunging on their knees, snarling at it. Their red eyes bared down on it as they shouted, fit to sink their teeth into it until it burst into a red pool, "You are not the fucking victim!"

"Woah! Woah woah, hey!" Susie said, scrambling forward and pulling them back, snagging their cape from her wrist spikes, "Chill out, chill.. I think.. I think you guys might be talking above each other. Kris.. I think the SOUL might already have a body, but it got separated somehow.."

"YES"

Kris let out a hiss from between clenched teeth, "Why me? Why choose me to be the cage? Why not anyone else? Why?" They knew why, the realization crawled over them slowly like mold on fruit. They were sure of it. The promise. They didn't know, they weren't completely sure. But they never agreed to THIS, did they? No, their promise was different. It was different.

"Why'd you have to possess Kris?"

"NO CHOICE. VESL DESTROYED."

Both Susie and Kris simmered. The answer, even if true, was lackluster. It was giving them only slivers of answers. Maybe through the medium of the conversation, maybe for another reason. Kris bitterly realized this is what Susie felt learning that her friends were obstructing her. They were just as rotten as the SOUL hovering in front of them. Guilty.

"KRIS"

Their face twisted into a grimace, they felt their body erupt into goosebumps. It was like seeing a painting blink. This parasite, this Watcher... Calling their name. It knew their name. Of course it did. But seeing it, *hearing it*. It felt paralyzing. Guilty. Susie brushed her shoulder against theirs, nervous for what was coming.

"SRRY 4 BEING BAD @ DODGING"

Kris let out a burst of sound that morphed into a hysteric, scared laugh. "I... I want to... Susie, I want to shatter it... I can't shake it." The friendliness.. It sickened them.

GUILTY.

Susie's face was knit with concern. "It harmless, at least."

"Okay but it's NOT harmless, Susie!" Kris was impassioned, tugging on their own capelet like an anxious dog " This... THING. Keeping me prisoner, controlling me. I've stolen from my brother, I've- lied to you and Ralsei, had to watch you get downed knowing *I* could have done something! Whatever it is pushing me towards... I'm supposed to pity it for losing its body? What the fuck do you think it's doing to me?! I.... " They trailed off as they recognized Susie's complete stillness.

"Yell at me again and see what happens." Susie threatened calmly, showing her teeth through a frown, "I'm not your enemy. I'm here with you, right?"

Kris' hand was clasped over their mouth, in disbelief that had happened. They hadn't lost themselves against another person in years. And for it to be Susie of all people? Guilt wracked them, leaving fingerprints over their vision. "Right. Right. I'm so sorry, shit." They mumbled, misty eyed. Cautiously they reached and took her good hand in theirs, shaking, and squeezed it, "I'm here with you. Sorry".

Susie softened instantly. This side of Kris scared her. Not the angry side. Not the side that kept a knife tucked in their waistband. This. The vulnerable, scared side that felt like one shift would send them back into their mask, back where she couldn't follow them. She didn't want their comfortable quiet to go back to Kris' self-exiled silence. "Hey, leader. What do I ask it now?" She asked softly, squeezing their hand.

Kris was quiet for another moment, looking mutely at the SOUL before their mumbling voice broke through the silence. "Ask... Ask it why it made me go to Mrs. Crystal's grave?"

Susie was in disbelief, "That's... What the hell would it get from that?" She turned back to the SOUL, swallowing hard, "Hey. Why did you go to Snowy's Mom's grave?"

The SOUL hesitated. Kris spoke, "I felt it there, when I read the headstone. One of the only times I was able to feel it back. It was... Mourning."

Susie let out a breath she didn't know she was hiding in her lungs, "You felt it? Like its emotions?"

"It felt... not like I was sharing their feeling, but like I was feeling it through a reflection. That makes no sense but it's the closest way to describe it."

Finally, the SOUL returned to typing. "KNEW HER. OTHR TIME OTHR PLACE."

Susie huffed, "Like you were her friend in the past or somethin'? Didn't she die years ago?"

Kris nodded, "Yeah, right after I was ad-.. uh, ah, I was only moved into hometown for a year or so before she died."

"OTHR WORLD. DIFFERENT WORLD."

Now they both were rapt in attention. How did they even respond to that? Kris felt Susie's hand go clammy. "You... Are from a different world? One with Miss Crystal in it? That doesn't make sense." Susie repeated them word for word, lost on what else to do.

"YES. SAME PPL, DIFFERENT TIME & PLACE."

Susie rubbed the back of her neck, thinking. "Okay. What the HELL does that mean?" She didn't know who she was asking, Kris or the SOUL.

Kris was chewing on the fringe of their cape, "I believe it." Their voice was a rasp, blue skin flushed, "That feelings was.. I dunno, it was real. I only felt it for a minute but.. Maybe there's another world where we're different. Where everything has the same parts but is different..." Maybe Susie was beside that other Kris right now? Maybe, through time and space she was always their friend. Maybe this intense feeling of friendship and trust between them was almost cosmically decreed.

"You think we're buddies there, too?" Susie asked. Kris broke from their thought cycle and broke into a wide smile. "Eh? You were totally thinkin' the same thing! Man, we're probably way cooler than them, wherever they are."

Kris shook their head, snorting, "...For sure."

"Hey, Kris, you said you felt them other times, what was the other time?"

The SOUL answered before Kris had a chance.

"SANS"

"The janitor? That fucking blows." Susie retorted sharply. Susie was deeply familiar with the feeling of meeting Mom's New Boyfriend. Having to watch that weirdo make Kris go through the same thing made her slam that grinning asshole firmly at the top of her shit list.

"It was excited. Like a little kid. It made me say 'Good to see you again' when I first saw them." Kris said flatly. They pursed their lips, debating on whether to bring it up before the scale tipped, "Then. Last night. I felt something different. Familiar. I don't know how to describe it though." Memories, hazy. Like remember a dream hours after waking. Memories of dodging, twisting in circles to avoid yawning serpent faces, lunging at him.

"SANS. MY FRIEND. SANS MY ENEMY. "

Kris let out a low growl, chewing their bottom lip. "I knew it. I had the muscle memory of killing him."

"What?!" Susie asked, yellow eyes wide, turning away from the SOUL again, "You.. You did? That's... That's actually.. That's pretty badass, Kris."

Kris huffed, "Stop it. You don't mean that."

She put her hands up, "Okay, you're literally telling me that an interdimensional alien thing gave you the memory of killing your mom's boyfriend. That goes hard as fuck dude. Tell me I'm wrong."

Kris nodded. She got them there.

"WHAT AN ASSHOLE"

Both of them nodded this time. Finally they had reached a common ground. Fuck Sans.

"HEY"
"U HIT ME W A HOCKEY PUCK."
"BITCH"

Susie burst into hawkish laughter, "Dude! Whatever you did to provoke them- No, Y'know what? Maybe if you didn't suck ass at dodging you wouldn't'a got hit."

Internally, Kris marveled at Susie. She had such a short temper, such an inability to not jump to conclusions. But here, and now.. She was different. A shield. It made listening to the SOUL less of a gut wrenching experience and more of a true conversation. She was so hopeful that they could come to a happy ending that it started to make Kris think she might be right. Especially since it seemed like the longer they talked the more authentic the responses they were able to force from it.

"SRRY"

"Ask it if it knows my brother.." Kris was testing something a lot more grim. Susie didn't know it yet, but Kris was checking to see how much it really knew. Did it know about the Knight? Did it know about Dess? Did it.. know about the promise? The whole truth?

"Do you know Kris' brother? Uhh.. Aster?"

"Asriel"

"Duh! Sorry, Asriel"

The SOUL floated in limbo. It felt like a stare. It could have been a thoughtful pause. But it felt like a stare.

"YES."

Kris whimpered. It did?

"GOD OF HYPERDEATH"

Susie huffed, concerned at the ominous message..

But Kris?

Kris exploded into hysterics, their laughter like bursting fireworks that left them breathless and red faced.

"No! No fucking way." They said, wiping their eyes, snorting. It felt like a string in their mind snapped, "SERIOUSLY? The fucking god of hyperdeath??"

They covered their face, "Susie that's his fucking sona in Super Smashing Fighters."

Susie looked between the SOUL and Kris, her brain imagining a lanky teenage Ralsei, posting pictures of their sick OC on Teenzer. Then she was laughing, too.

There was a beat as Kris wiped their eyes, catching their breath. "I feel like I'm going crazy."

"You're not. Everything around us is crazy." Susie assured them. They caught each other looking relieved, and it brought them both comfort.

Then the SOUL began to type.

"DO U REMEMBER?"

They watched, slowly, as the SOUL began to type again.

It felt like all of the air was sucked out of the room.

"DO YOU REMEMBER DYING ?"

Chapter Text

Susie huffed, incredulous at the question. "Kris, what is it talking abou...." In horror she trailed off as she saw their face. Pale. Wide eyed. Mouth ajar. True horror, like they had seen the devil stand before them.

"Kris." Susie repeated gravely, her voice low, "Kris what the fuck is it talking about?"

Kris was frozen, staring like the question couldn't catch them, "I.. ... Oh god" their head was spinning. It was real. They hung their head, shoulders shaking as they swallowed down the monstrous and unutterable crawling through them. "I remember."

"WHAT?" Susie shouted, "Y-You?! You do?!" She took Kris by the shoulders, spinning them to face her head on, "Kris, Kris tell me this is a prank, please. Tell me you don't- that you -... That..." Kris tilted their head up, exhausted flesh-red eyes catching onto hers. They were serious. They were. They remembered.

"I thought .. I just thought I was crazy." Kris admitted.

"SORRY"

"Shut! The fuck! Up!" Susie voice cracked pathetically as she shouted at the SOUL. "Why didn't you tell me?! Kris, you've been ...dying... during battles? When you get downed, I thought you were just hurt." Kris was stony. They just kept looking at her with watery eyes and the same gaunt expression.

"Talk to me. C'mon, talk to me" The raw edge in her voice grew like ripped stitches.

"I'm crazy. " Kris repeated quietly, their voice barely above the ambient air, "Didn't know that's what was happening. I just thought.. It doesn't feel 'real' when it happens."

Kris had always imagined death as a close friend coming home to a surprise party. Their was arrival an inevitable, a tender easement of the insurmountable. It would feel like sliding into a warm bath. Warm and safe all over. Feeling their thoughts fizzle up and dissolve out like a bath bomb under the faucet into the void. Consciousness blinking out. It would be like hearing someone play piano down a hallway maybe, smooth and slow and only a little sad. And then? Nothing. Yawning, gaping nothing that stretched them until they were scattered so thin nobody anywhere would call for them. They imagined it a lot. More when they were still a kid than they did now, but the scenario was still one of worn-in familiarity. Something to think of before bed when they needed comfort.

What the SOUL dragged from the recesses of their memory was not that. It wasn't good. It wasn't their friend, there was no warmth. It was a sharp pain in their chest and a sharper fade to black. Pulsating red shards spilling out of their breastplate into their hands and between their static fingers. Cold gushing ink, white fractals in perpetual osmosis blanketing their vision. The worst part was the pleading. "Susie, you ever try to kill yourself?"

If her expression was shock before, it was now something incomprehensible to Kris, sliding to her knees from where she was crouched like a tumbling bag of rocks. "Oh, Kris."

She grabbed them coarsely, as a toddler would grab a teddy bear, and tucked them into her chest in the biggest, hardest hug she could manage without crushing them. She was the biggest in her class, and they were the smallest, and it felt like that was just for this moment. Just so she could slide her chin on the crown of their head and feel them curled in her arms like her missing piece. Just enough to pull them both away from the horrible things in Kris' head. Susie chanted in her head, over and over, let me be your shield. Let me be your shield.

"Why wouldn't you let me give up?" Kris rasped into the fabric of her vest, "Why? You and Ralsei always begging, telling me to get back up. Every time it happens I hear you."

" You know why" Susie answered, sniffling, staying as brave as she could," 'Cause. 'cause you're stuck with me. Too bad for you, huh?"

"NOT YOUR DEATH, JUST MINE. INTERESTING."

"Can you lay off?!" Susie growled hatefully. "If they feel it, it doesn't matter WHOSE death it is!" She felt Kris turn their head, hum for just a second.

"KNIGHT DEATHS. DID U HEAR HIM?"

Susie could feel Kris' wet eyelashes against her scales as they blinked. Kris did hear something in the dark. During those deaths. God, the deaths. Countless, spanning deaths, the constant and unrelenting barrage of downing and trying again. A purgatory of their own making. It was always capped by the voice of what they assumed to be a cross between an old man and interference. "I heard him." Kris answered darkly, "Dunno the language."

"O"

Susie jumped, "Woah! Wait! You heard them?!"

"YES! HELLO KRIS"

They felt her squeeze tighter at hearing the SOUL call their name again. Her hackles were raised, it made her lungs burn. She finally understood why Kris was so insistent on her staying cold to it, and she was not willing to put her guard down now. Not now. Not ever again. Her grasp on Kris in the real world was firm. She wanted to eat their mind too. To know them completely. Even the scary parts she didn't get and didn't want to think about. Especially those parts. This thing, she reasoned, was probably the source of all of their secrets.

Kris, meanwhile, realized slowly that being here, being hugged by her, feeling safe enough to hug her back.. Felt warm all over. Like a hot bath. They liked feeling her breathe, hearing her thin heartbeat. Even though they were staring down their controller... The fear they started with was rounded away the longer she had them in her grasp.
"You wanna take a break, Kris? We can go to the diner or something. Skip stones. Jaywalk."

"I'm okay." They said softly, tears drying, "I'm okay, really."

"I don't buy it."

Kris, begrudgingly, parted from her hug to look at her. Their eyes were rimmed pink like they had been crying but the tightly wound, severe look they had on their face was lessened to just a tired, stressed acceptance... and they stayed close enough to her that their arms were touching, their cape protecting them from the frequent pokes of Susie's armor. "I'm okay. I think I... I get it."

"KRIS. U CAN TELL ME NO."

They wiped their nose on the back of their hand, "I don't believe you."

" :/ MAN." It only stopped for a second before it started typing again, "I WANT U 2 BE HAPPY."

Kris didn't shift, "I don't believe you" they repeated.

" LOOK @ FIREWORKS W FUN GANG"

There was a pause. What the hell was it referring to? Fireworks? Oh. It did, on the conveyor belt in Cyber City. When the fireworks started, Ralsei was the first to turn to watch them, at first purely due to the loud bang. Then the fear turned to childish delight as he recognized his own face in the skyline. Then Susie paused beside him, watching with amazement. Kris walked past them at first. Then, they whipped around on the ball of their heel and stood between them. Watching the fireworks. Sharing the moment. Laughing with his friends about the weird way their heads distorted as the sparks faded out. That was the SOUL, wasn't it?

"DIDN'T MAKE U GO W BERDLY 2 THE FESTIVAL..." It did type the ellipses.

Kris exhaled, "oh, fuck off" they said, wiping their eyes. The way they said it this time didn't have bite to it. It wasn't true forgiveness, but if I as a beginning.
"I can tell you no?"

"YEAG"

"And you won't..."

It cut them off "NO. I AM NOT THAT. WE CAN BE GOOD."

My sheath. Kris heard it say it, a whisper layered under what they typed. They knew what it referenced. The sheath. Breath quickens around swords. Why did it say that? Did it say that, even, or was it a guilty conscience speaking for them. Were they hearing things again?

Did it even matter?

".... Okay."

Susie interjected with a threat, "If I find out you're doing any evil shit." Susie threatened, baring her fangs, "I'll crush you into pulp myself."

" OK "

The SOUL, the Angel, glided off of the keyboard, resting before Kris' knees like a bestowed artifact.

Kris smacked it away with the back of their hand as if it were a cat toy. "Sorry. Force of habit."

The SOUL went back to the keyboard. "BITCH."

Chapter Text

It situated itself into their chest like a bird returning to roost. Kris felt it beat in tandem with their heartbeat in a cheap imitation. They were mute again, silent safe for their breathing.

Exhaustion gave way to passivity. Susie guiding them to the light world, only two steps ahead of them. Sitting them at the picnic table that was still a little wet from the downpour. Pushing brown paper bags of sandwiches and fries at them until they didn't have a choice to talk or be quiet. Kris appreciated that. They knew she didn't know what to say. Neither did Kris. This was an excellent compromise. Eating is automatic. Sitting at a table and biting and chewing was its own kind of intimacy. Eating and looking at each other like science projects.

"Is this your new way of healing ?" Kris asked between fries and ketchup and licking salt from under their mostly unpainted fingernails.

Wait! they spoke first? That broke the rules. The SOUL, the angel, whatever it was- it was slacking the chain across Kris' neck. The realization that it wasn't lying to them was equally invigorating and frightening.

"Ha!" Susie said in her sharkish tone, accidentally flecking the picnic table with ketchup, "Dude you freakin' wish. I only have like. Twenty bucks, so I think it's a limited run light world exclusive." She reached across the table and pat their arm, only getting a little burger grease on them, "stuck with me." She reminded them playfully.

"I don't understand you." Kris said with an uneasy smile. "Why aren't you freaked out? or pissed off?" Kris wanted to jump on the table and rip their hair and commit seppuku and fall down a well or-

Susie shrugged, "Dude it can't be worse than before we were friends" her tone was light, matter of fact. As if it was abundantly obvious. "I know I haven't known you that long or anything. So you might not know this but. I had nothin'. I still got nothin' except you and Ralsei and the prophecy and whatever's left of your fries.."

Kris smirked, sliding the rest of their fries towards her. Wordlessly she obliged, scooping them into her mouth with a distinct lack of etiquette. "No, I get it. I get it more than I think you know." They felt like an asshole the second they said it with the way her nose wrinkled. That was the problem, wasn't it? That she didn't know? Both of them knew it now.

"Do you know December?" Kris asked cautiously, looking at the storm clouds starting to gather above them again.

"Uh, the fucking month?"

Kris scrunched their face, "No! Noelle's sister."

"Ohhh, yeah, we were in her room yesterday. What about her?"

Their hands fidgeted with their sleeves, "Y'know she went missing, right?"

Susie's face was blank for a moment as she processed. Kris continued, "After that happened..it was like I lost everything. Noelle doesn't even remember we were friends. Azzy went to college and hasn't called. And Dess... Isn't coming back." They leaned back, looking away nervously, "It already sucks having no friends. During all that Dad lost his job and..." They made a gesture. "Poof. You have nothing. Everyone knows about the freak family and their freak human child and the freak things they do. The good one left. The foster kid. The bad kid. The one with 'problems'."

Cautiously they glanced back at her. Susie was wearing a look of delight. She had a goofy smile on her face. "No way!!" She exclaimed, "Dude, you're a foster kid too?!"

Kris had to laugh. Every time they thought they knew how she would react they were checked, "Yeah, I was. I got- I.. I was adopted at 5." They didn't know that about her.. or really any facts about her light world life. It made sense, now that they thought about it. "Susie....You didn't think my parents just.. had a human baby, right?"

Susie punched their arm from across the table, "Oh shut up, I didn't know if you were straight up adopted or... Okay, yeah, you got me. I actually didn't even question it."

"You're a foster kid?"

"Dude, haha. Wanna hear something cool in a sad way?" Susie said. Kris nodded eagerly and that was all she needed, "So if you're a bad enough kid, right? And you get kicked outta enough placements they straight up let you live alone." She said proudly.

The SOUL made the selection this time, Kris had felt it observing the options. Maybe it was reflexive, or not.
"That's actually equally sad and cool". Kris coughed into their sleeve, "Like totally alone?"

She nodded, "Social worker pops in once a day, bugs me for a little bit, then leaves. Honestly? Once I got used to it, not so bad."

Kris reached out and touched her arms, not really even noticing that they were doing it. Playing with the big hexagonal scales, tapping the freckles around her wrists, "Huh. That's why you didn't call your parents.. Do you know 'em?"

Her face darkened. Kris was watching her face closely, trying to learn her as deeply as they could during this calm. She would always shift her hair in front of her eyes, tilt her head down just enough so that her brows cast shadows over her cheeks. "Kinda. But that's a bummer to think about!" She exclaimed, "You're really in your goddamn feels today, huh?" She asked, grabbing their arms back and playfully shaking them, "Trying to see me crying again, huh?!"

Kris laughed, " No! No!" They promised, getting jostled probably much harder than Susie anticipated, "I just wanna know more about you!"

Susie stopped shaking them, looking flustered. Oh! That was very direct. Despite the normalcy of what they said, there was something about how they said it. Something warm and fuzzy that made her think about how they looked wiping her spit off of their face.

"Geez, that's like way worse than making me cry." She smiled as she laid her head on her arms, still holding onto them, "I wish we could be.. uhh... Brand new. Not like babies! But completely blank slates. Without any of the stupid stuff in the past that we're carrying around."

Kris felt an ache in their chest. They had wished infinitely to disappear. To die. To be different. But never to be new. It was an interesting thought. To choose to still be Kris but lighter felt oddly revolutionary and almost childishly hopeful.

"Don't just stare at me after I say something stupid!" Susie barked.

The SOUL gingerly gave them options. Kris was surprised at the choices. The choices were more informed by their train of though. "I just... Wish the same thing." They looked at her, the way she was looking relieved at how they agreed. Somewhere, in that other time and place, they were sure that Kris and Susie were sitting across from each other.
They were happy, too.

Chapter Text

Kris heard their phone ring and they were made to answer it. On the other end, their mother was concerned. Come home, she said. The storm was only resting now, behind the thin line of sky on the lake were graphite colored clouds rolling forcefully towards Hometown. Kris simply said 'okay' and the call was over.

The whole time their other hand was peacefully under Susie's. For the first time in years, Kris didn't feel crazy or scared. It felt cozy, even if their legs and arms were wet from the picnic table and their stomach ached from all the heavy food.

"I gotta go home." Susie said, sighing and glancing at the lake, having overheard half the conversation, "Check in is at 6 with the Susie-Sitter. Can't be late again this week..." Her eyes wandered over and settled on Kris' face, comfortably sighing, "But... I'll be back around to bother you, y'hear?"

Kris nodded, wanting the moment to last just another split second. "Uh.. okay. I'll tell mom you're coming over."

They both stood.

...

They both awkwardly stared at each other.

....

They both became entirely aware of how they were standing and staring each other... And how awkward it was.

"Kris," Susie said through her yellowed fangs, "Kiss me goodbye before I start to look desperate for standing here!" Susie asserted, hands pressed on the back of her neck. Despite her intensity she was a deep ruddy purple.

Kris was, at first, frozen in place, lungs squeezed tight by excitement. She was definitely making her own fate. Kris, however, was scared to bring what had happened last night into the Light World. What if this was the moment they both realized they messed up, the moment they left a permanent smear on their friendship? What if this was Noelle over again? What if this was Dess and Azzy? Standing there, that was, until they were willed to step forward and did so. From there it was automatic, like a dance they had practiced. Instinctual and natural. Taking her head in their hands and pulling her lower, they were able to kiss her on their tip toes. Kris pressed their lips together, feeling the fireworks bursting in their chest and spinning their head. It made everything better. Her lips were soft, like they imagined a humans would be, and every part as good as they were in Castle Town, without the frenzy. The shaking breath she took in through her nose as they kissed nearly made Kris faint from the sensation, racing sparklers down their arms and spine into their fingertips as though they would take flight if she did it again. When they parted Kris had the strange thought that maybe death could wait a goddamn minute, maybe it was going to be okay. Really okay this time.

"You need to invest in some heels if you're gonna keep doin' this with me" Susie said, husky voice low and playful.

Kris snickered at her dig, especially when they watched her straighten her back out and appear to grow an extra foot. The options they were given almost made them laugh twice, but the SOUL was silent and Kris chose to end the conversation with an eager smile.

--

The walk home, dictated by the SOUL, gave them a chance to think. The SOUL knew the code. The SOUL-
The first drip of rain landed on the toe of their shoe. They hoped Susie would get home before the rain. They wished they were behind her with an open umbrella and-
-Right! Back on track, the SOUL could hear them now when they spoke. It had evolved somehow. Could it hear their thoughts?

'Can you hear me?'

There was no difference in their pace. That meant 'No', then.

So they still had the privacy of thought. The SOUL had snuck through the house, gotten the code, and knew that the bunker door had opened on Friday. They were able to beat the Knight, and they appeared entirely aware of Kris' double crossing. But what was its goal? The SOUL moved into their body for the prophecy, obviously. It wasn't the first SOUL to take residency in their body. But-

Interrupted again. Toriel hugged Kris tightly as they walked through the door, and they felt the last traces of the fireworks fade into ashes as the door swung closed behind her. "There you are! I called you this morning but I seemed not to have any signal from the rain. You have been so active lately, being awake before me is so unusual!" She was in the middle of cooking, they could hear the sizzle of the frying pan from the entryway, "I am making pasta and escargot for dinner, if you are hungry."

"I'm okay." Kris answered softly. They always felt so small and childish around her. She wasn't even doing anything overly provoking, but the absence of Susie made it all the more obvious. She was really the only one in their life that didn't bend over backwards to coddle them or protect them, "Gonna go to bed early, I think." She nodded with a serene look, unaware.

In the hallway, they were stopped to look at themselves in the mirror. 'Someone else, looking at nothing' they thought scornfully. Shaggy chestnut hair in loose waves that spilled over their face and scraped across their shoulders. A striped hoodie. A hand-me-down relic of when Azzy was still Kris' size, maybe 5 years ago. Eyes like bullet holes, blood red and watering. They swallowed, uncomfortable. Why was it making them stare at themselves?

"Work with me" They heard themselves say aloud, voice monotone and rusty and much, much lower than they were expecting.

Kris watched their own eyes widen. Oh. They understood perfectly.

"Go fuck yourself." Kris responded, breaking into a frenzied smile.

"Kris."

They shivered hard, wracked with the feeling of articulating their lips and tongue and teeth only to hear a different voice come out. A scene from a nightmare come to life.

"Please." They pleaded in a whisper, bravado stripped away quicker than it appeared. Kris was pressing their forehead against the mirror, "Please. Go away."

"Kris! I am.." They let out a low growl, fogging the mirror, "I am on YOUR side!"

"Shut up! Shut up, don't let mom hear you." They stressed to it, leaving a smear across the smooth glass as their damp forehead moved across, "She'll... Sh- She'll think I'm crazy."

"Don't ....ignore me, Kris."

"No!" Kris defiantly bucked their head away from the mirror, refusing to look (or hear) any more. It was disturbing. Their side. It was laughable. The Angel had no clue about the promise, or about what had happened the last three years. Or the near miss. Or what made everything come crashing down or the abject agony that followed. This was nothing more than a repeat. One that might end with the same agony as before. It was doing as the last soul did. Predictable, violating, ridiculous.
Kris felt themself move from where they were immobile against the mirror and walk to the hall closet. Quietly, the SOUL had them pulling down a basket on what was normally their mom's shelf. They wanted to struggle, but the morbid curiosity carried them as much as the SOUL did. They sat forcefully on the bed and brought the basket beside them.

"What, you're gonna... knock me out? Poison me? Make me sick or something?" They asked with a hateful tone. "None of this matters anyway. You know how it ends."

The SOUL seemed to lose their voice as Kris clenched their jaw tight. They held their breath. Work for it if you want it so bad.

Kris' hand was sent into the basket, raking through hair gel, nail scissors, and medication until it seemed to feel exactly what it was looking for and jerked it out.

...

Nail polish. Hard as Scales in the color 'Gooped Out', a rich arsenic green color. The SOUL felt Kris go slack and took the opportunity to speak, "... Do... Do you want green?"

Kris was silent, staring at the nail polish, the hands holding the bottle, the bedspread. They swallowed, throat tightened.... then nodded like a child.

"Dramatic..." It said softly, "You.. You're safe here."

They watched as their hand shook the bottle, unscrewed the cap, then cautiously and precisely began tracing the lacquer across their nails. Were they safe? Kris took a second to focus on the cold sensation of the brush across their nailbeds. Was this really happening? Their nails were still stained orange from where they had blacked them out with sharpie. But in one sweep they were a saturated green.
"You k.... kissed Susie."

They repositioned their hand to let the SOUL paint their thumb easier. Susie. The feeling shined on them again. A feeling that everything was going to be okay. That surrendering wasn't necessary. They admired her ability to change. They wanted to change, too. "Yeah?"

"Nice. You seem ... Giddy."

Kris fought it, but they couldn't help but crack a smile. What a stupid thing to say. Now of all times, too. Everything the SOUL was doing was stupid. Painting their nails. Negotiating with them, making those goofy comments towards them. Acting like it cared about the Cage. Like they weren't feeding the sacrifice. Kris had the mental image of an old man with the SOUL, clumsily reaching out and failing to connect to a grandchild. It was endearing in an alienating, sad way. More sad than endearing. Maybe not endearing at all. But not hateful anymore. The mental image of them squeezing the little red light until it burst into spray was no longer gnawing at the forefront of their mind. That was a start.

Five fingers were now glossy and drying. Kris nodded approvingly. The polish bottle traded hands, "Kris? Why .... did you do that? Work with.. Work with them?"

Kris grimaced, choosing their silence. The SOUL sensed their reticence and gave them options again. Kris closed their eyes. Try again, fucker. They would rather drink the polish than get into that.

".... Can't... I can't paint... without seeing.."

They way they said it, what they said... It triggered a bad memory. Very, very bad, like a reaching hand from under a bed. Kris jerked their head and opened their eyes wide. The SOUL hesitated for a second, then resumed painting their nails.

"You don't. Have to tell me." The bottle was twisted shut and set back in the basket. Kris looked at their nails. Green like Nickelodeon slime, drying glossy smelling like acetone. They didn't even want to admit it to themselves, but they liked it a lot. It was different. It made them feel.... Something new. Something positive towards how they looked.

The SOUL continued, "Oh... I don't blame you."

Kris scoffed. "I didn't ask if you did." They said sensitively, staring down at their hands.

"For leaving her... For failing..."

Now they were both quiet before Kris' voice, still low and rough added, "You were just a kid."

Chapter Text

Kris, incensed, reared their hand back to rip the SOUL out in one smooth motion, knocking over the basket and sending polish bottles clacking across their bedspread. The muscles in their arm spasmed and froze defiantly, Kris heard themself gasp and growl as they struggled against themselves.

"No! Urrgh, You! Your nails.. Are wet!"

Kris yielded out of disbelief at its reasoning. What a stupid SOUL, what a sorry excuse for an Angel. What a horrible thing to say to them, so flippant and so entitled. "You don't know ANYTHING!" Kris shouted at their wall, snarling. "You don't! You don't know what I did! You don't know how it ENDS!" They didn't want to think about it, they couldn't think about it, they couldn't confront the gaping, aching spill in the center of their memory. The more they talked about it the more it spread onto them and stained itself permanently, vividly, into their memory. Years of hard work, specialists, and rituals to turn the memory into a bad dream, a lie told by a bad little kid, getting undone before their very eyes.

Now it was quiet, listening. Its silence reviled them, drove them closer to the edge. Now it was quiet, after it exhausted all it could pick and pull and spill?

"You!! Don't know what happened! You never will! So STOP! ASKING!"

They were shouting so forcefully they felt themselves drooling.

The SOUL again kicked up its control, going to speak but Kris forbid it, rushing all of their air out of their lungs and clamping their jaws onto their tongue. The SOUL wrapped their arms around themself and squeezed, growling lowly.

Kris held this pose as they wrestled like a mad dog with each other and nobody at the same time. Twitched and growled and held their breath until a moment of lucidity struck Kris and they imagined what they looked like sitting there. They looked like a tragedy up close but far away? They imagined themselves looking like a rabid animal, hugging themselves and carrying on a one-sided argument. It was darkly amusing. They relaxed their muscles, face compressed against the comforter until the SOUL sensed their surrender and let their arms fall limp. They really were crazy.

--
Kris ran down the road with the wagon handle squeezed tight around their fingers, huffing the whole way. It had rained that morning, and the wet grass rose up to meet their feet and brush their legs as they chased after their big brother and his girlfriend. The birdcage knocked onto its side with a loud metallic bang as they slid to a stop in front of the doors.

"Just like we practiced, okay bub?" Asriel asked. Looking back, Kris would have picked up on his uncharacteristic reluctance, the way he wrinkled his nose and pointed his eyebrows.

Kris nodded with a proud (albeit gap-toothed) smile. The human SOUL, cage, and parts was bouncing from foot to foot as Asriel and Dess pried the steel doors open, "We're gonna be heroes"
---

Kris tasted a little copper on their tongue from the bite. They swallowed it to avoid having to get up. "Who was your last vessel?" They mumbled numbly, catching their breath.

"In another world... a little child."

"How'd they do?" Kris stayed flopped down, staring at the birdcage.

"They... They did wonderful."

"You mean they obeyed you, don't you?"

Kris felt their eyes well with tears and struggled to blink them back down before they fell, the unresolved release tightening their throat. But where those tears were drawn from was a complicated, unwelcome question. So they didn't question it.

"No..." The SOUL's response lacked the usual monotonous hum, gliding from their mouth with a soft somber tone as though they were back at the cemetery, "No, they were... They were brave. A wonderful brave thing..."

Kris didn't pick their nails or chew their lips, instead letting the anxiety wad in their stomach like a ball of tar, "And what am I?" They felt the memory spreading like spilled paint. Begging to be acknowledged.

"..."

A surge of fresh, tarry anger rushed through Kris, "You don't get to be quiet, now. Answer me."

"..."

Kris sat up, "ANSWER me, goddamn it. You don't get to- to pick at my thoughts and-" They rubbed their eyes and nose aggressively against their sleeves, "You don't get to choose.. You don't..."

"I don't know." It answered calmly into their sleeves.

"Dumb fucking answer. Try again."

"You're..." It let out a hiss through their teeth, "Resilient." The voice was moved like liquid, like it was tapping into a deep memory.

Kris was unmoved, "Is... Uh, is that good?"

There was another silence, but it wasn't sharp like it was a moment before. Now it was filled with rain strumming against the windowpane and their soft breathing.

"Yes. Yes, of course. You are Good."

Kris curled in on themselves until their knees were snug against their chin. Why did that answer make them feel so sick? Kris didn't get the sense that the Angel was lying, or that it even could lie in the first place. But something about it- maybe hearing their own voice say that, maybe that they knew deep down that they were not good, not good at all... It made Kris feel seasick against their own heartbeat.

"You ever failed?" They asked pointedly, "Like your mission or your objective or whatever you do?"

"... Yes."

---
"Good job Krissy." Dess said softly, sweat dripping off her forehead. Kris was sitting in the wagon numbly, legs folded. They weren't even sure they were listening. Everything felt so heavy and cold. Doing anything other than force air in and out of their open mouth was too much. Asriel was stroking Kris' red hair, struggling against himself to stop crying.

"I should do it." Asriel mumbled, sniffling wetly "I should be t-"

December cut him off, "Hell no! You know that's not how it goes. Come on, Prince. It's just on the other side of the door, then we win." She pulled out her sword, hooves clacking slightly against the handle as she shook from anticipation.

Kris rolled their head to stare at their brother, watching him inspect the glow emanating from the birdcage in his hands, its red glow reflecting off of his glasses. Kris watched him tensely catch Kris' gaze and avert his eyes. Asriel's sniveling grimace betrayed his understanding of what they just did. It hurt. Asriel knew it hurt. Dess knew it hurt. They didn't understand. Why did they do that?

Would it feel like that forever?
---

Oh. They regretted asking. They genuinely hadn't fathomed that *the* Angel could fail. It made tomorrow's arrival burn at the back of their throat. Failure tomorrow wasn't an option. If they had to feel themselves die a thousand more times it couldn't happen. It couldn't. They refused the alternative.
"Do you think- I mean.." Kris cleared their throat, feeling their walls crumbling, "Is Mister Gerson right? Uh, what he said about Susie. Was he right? Can she change the story?" She wanted the story to have no ending. At the time, they thought it was a silly answer. But knowing the end was snaking around the corner, the thought of spending their days with Susie and Ralsei and their nights with her forever felt right. "Can she change the ending?"

Another silence.

---
Kris stared in horror. They were staring through her. Her steel armor was torn open like a tuna can. The massive orbed tail of the beast withdrew slowly, and Kris was looking at its gleeful, squinting smile through the hole it left in December's chest. Asriel, driven into stunned horror, fell to his knees in front of the wagon. All he could do was let out a whimper of defeat. His will to fight, much like the sterling future he had planned, was shattered into thousands of pieces. They watched the ruby red fragments spill out of her gaping breastplate and scatter along the tiled ground.
----

"I... I hope so."

Chapter Text

Kris let out a sob, shaking their head desperately. The SOUL and vessel were helpless to do anything but wait for the shivering, crawling memory to wash over them both. Kris didn't do anything. They just sat in the wagon. The just watched it happen. They just sat there in the fucking wagon. The memory cracked and broke through the dam, and Kris was again its victim with the watcher holding on to avoid being drowned. Why didn't they stop it? Why didn't they do something- anything. Anything at all.

Shiny red shards, like children's toys half buried in a sand box scattered around the blackened ground. Kris found themselves fighting through the hunger and reaching towards one over the edge of the wagon, the glittering light barely breaking through the foggy darkness. Right before their fingernail grazed its shiny surface they heard it for the first time. The unspeaking but loud, the chattering like laughter through their bones, the voice so alluring that even the spokes of the wagon vibrated in response. The smiley voice that purred and coaxed.

Why don't you give Dess a hand?
You already gave her your heart. Go on, be a Big Kid!
Dess will be okay if you give her a hand!

Kris sharply drew their hands back into the wagon, tucked under their armpits and ducking their head down.

They made their choice. The smiling face gleefully nodded in understanding.

They watched Dess stagger, slump, then fall onto the black sand. There was something so obscene about it. A hero dies on the back of her shield, cradling the face of her true love before gasping and slipping into a peaceful sleep. This was not a heroes death. This was a wet, face-down, gurgling, twitching reality that rattled Kris and demanded attention. A scene that forever snuffed her grinning face out of all of Kris' memories like a chemical burn.

From her still body rose a new darkness. Within the gaping absence in her chest bubbled and oozed a blackness neither Asriel or Kris had ever fathomed. True darkness was black, but this? This was not black, or shadow. It was an absence of sight, an incomprehensible, shifting nothing spilling sloppily like paint upward and outward towards them as the smiling face watched in the distance.
Kris watched the red shards get swallowed and drown into the blackness, never to be seen again. Maybe that was the moment when they recognized the droning humming sound of the scene was Asriel's harrowing, raw scream. Or maybe it was a little before. What he was saying, or if he was even saying anything? Kris couldn't say. All they were focused on was the last little red shard, the lost lamb, succumb to the crawling black. Red blinking out forever and ever.

they felt themselves jerk forward from the inertia of the wagon getting hauled backwards towards the doors. Missing posters with a face Kris didn't recognize went up the next morning. Two siblings sworn to secrecy.

Kris screamed into their hands until their voice failed them, face soaked with sweat and tears. It overwhelmed them, it devoured them. "Why! Why! Why! Why didn't-! Why!?" Their thoughts, the memories, threads of thought and prophecy and memory and speech and heroics and failure and GUILT that restrained and strangled them. Their hands in their hair, grasping and jerking in any direction, their forehead pressed into the drywall until the stimuli managed to cut through the devastation. Just enough that the SOUL could pry open their aching lungs for a desperate gasp of air.

"You! Were a ch-child!"

"I was a MURDERER." Kris wailed in response, howling cracking voice not used to speaking so loud but desperate, desperate to be heard, "I chose it! I did! I thought that *my* hand meant more than HER life!"

"You were a victim."

Kris bit down on the flesh of their palm, shaking their head as they sobbed and protested loudly.

No! No, they weren't. They knew the prophecy. The knew that a hero would have to get hurt somewhere- they were ready. They needed Kris. They needed the human SOUL, cage and parts. They needed the sacrifice. Asriel, stupid, thinking he was the Prince based only on his wishes and his similarity to the character. Naive, childish hopeful Asriel and Kris and December. They did everything as literally as they could, followed it to the letter down to bringing a real cage and something that could be scrapped for parts. They just wanted to be the heroes, the good guys. The pain was surely part of it, inextricable. They needed the Human Soul, Dess said so, said she could use it as a shining weapon. Take it in her hands and outshine the wicked darkness. But Kris was selfish. They couldn't even reach out to her. They chose half of their hands for her entire life. It was horrible, it was evil. It was cruel. Dess died for them. For what? To play piano, tie their own shoes? They disgusted themselves.

"You must-... have been so scared" It said through the skin of their hand.

Kris knocked their head against the wall again, harder this time, and felt the moment of impact disrupt the drowning memory just enough to breathe in again.

Were they scared? They remember the coldness. The hunger. Looking at Dess and Azzy and watching them avoid Kris' eyes. Look at me. Look at me. Wipe my tears like you do with Ellie. But they didn't say that. They didn't say anything. That was hopeless frustration; a lack of understanding of why they were doing this to them, why this emptiness ached so strangely. Now the Angel, the real Angel, was warm inside of their body breathing against their ribcage. That was its own strange sensation. But that first feeling of having no SOUL within their being? Nothing but muscles and organs and fascia inside of their body, spiritually bankrupted. That was when they were scared, truly scared.
It was when they witnessed the sight of the spilling shards, the barbed tail smashing the culmination of their being into a thousand little pieces like porcelain against a baseball bat... The fear was so big it couldn't be acknowledged without slipping completely into insanity.

"I was" Kris rasped in a watery voice, "I was."

"I'm so sorry"

The SOUL unwedged Kris' hand from their jaw, the deep grooves left in the skin a perfect casting of their teeth. It squeezed Kris' shoulders, and Kris had the somber, itching recognition that the SOUL appeared to be just as unprepared for what they both were forced to witness. There was no more prying. Just the sensation of Kris' own arms tight against their aching chest.

"You fol... followed Susie into the Dark World" Kris could hear how hoarse their voice was from screaming.

"I-.. Yeah"

"So you could save her."

Kris couldn't speak, nodding as they hiccupped, tears slowing and nose running. That was heroic, wasn't it? Going to the darkest depths after a girl they didn't even like.

"I know you..." It cooed through the jagged, crackling remains of their voice, jaw clicking, "I know you are good."

Kris shook their head 'no', but the SOUL continued, "You don't ... Have to believe me. You don't have t-to... Believe the Smiling Voice."

Slowly, Kris was rising up to lucidity, feeling the tears dry and the aching pain radiating from their throat, head and hands.
They sniffled, "But I'll never know if it-"

"You made the right choice."

The door swung open.

Chapter Text

Susie blinked, lips pursed, as she stared at the tableau before her.

Kris, kneeling on their bed, hunched with their arms wrapped around themselves like a straight jacket. Hair in every direction, a red bruise forming above their right eyebrow, skin tear streaked and covered in snot. Surrounded by bottles of nail polish. Their bloodshot eyes flicked up and met hers as they sniffled and caught their breath, becoming very very very lucid and self aware the longer they stared at each other.
"Oh! H-.. Hey." Kris cleared their throat, their mumbling voice scratchy, "What's- uh- What's up?" Kris asked, straightening their back and effortfully untensing their arms from around themselves.

Susie's hand was still gripping the door frame, scrunching every muscle in her face as she scrutinized Kris. "Dude. Do you need a freaking hug or something?"

Kris paused, thoughtful, then nodded vigorously, blinking out the last of their tears.

She let out a breath, "Mmk. Well, I can do that." She swung the door closed and tromped over. She sat on the bed behind them, nail polish bottles clicking around her body. She wrapped her arms around them, squeezing them until it felt just right and she felt Kris relax around her grasp.

Kris leaned against her, resting the back of their head on her shoulder. She rested her chin on their collarbone and felt them shiver. They sat like that for a while, peacefully compressing one another until Kris was regulated enough that Susie could break the silence, "Okay, who made you cry? I'll thrash 'em.." She let out a low sound, "It's the SOUL isn't it? Fucker..."

"No, no that's not it" Kris said breathily, "Just- Thinking." They pulled on the front strands of their hair and Susie nodded sagely. After such a massive breakdown, Kris was surprised at how they were feeling. Before, when they were trapped in therapy, any tears sapped out their energy and left them feeling paradoxically heavier than ever yet just as hollow. But that fit of biting, screaming, weeping they just finished? They felt... more. More what? Kris couldn't identify it. More everything. Lighter, almost euphoric from finally finally getting to see behind the massive black dam in their memory. They were free. Free to be horrified, free to be shackled by guilt.. but free to feel those things, rather than the dread of knowing one day they would remember. It didn't make sense, but sitting on their bed with Susie surrounding them, throat sore and eyes redder than ever.. They felt a sharpness of senses they thought had died many years ago. The SOUL breathing against their ribs, the ridges of Susie's fingertips, the throbbing pain in their right hand, their own heartbeat. It felt a lot. It felt good.

"I might kick its ass anyway."

Kris almost smiled. Almost.

Susie let out a low growl, "I know why you're cryin'. I couldn't stop thinking about it either, after I saw it." She flexed her cut up knuckles. "Y'know what's crazy though?"

"Hm?" Kris asked, turning their head to look at her.

"I'm not worried at all." She said, cracking a fanged smile, "You believe that? I'm 'destined' to get murked tomorrow. And I don't believe it. I'm not in denial, either."

"Oh you're actually crazy, huh?" Kris asked numbly, eyebrows pitched up.

"Hey, one of my best friends is literally a playing card. I'm so normal. You wish you were normal like me bro."

Now Kris smiled, their expression skeptical and a little pitying. She had the pen, didn't she? An unbreakable will. "You're playing tough."

Susie clicked her tongue, "Hey!! Don't piss me off!" she threatened. She switched positions, swinging her body in front of them, one leg crossed and one dangling off the bed, "I mean it!" She stressed. Kris was avoiding her eyes again. She felt them slipping back into the void, becoming unreachable. She let out a rumble, "Here asshole, want proof? Here's proof." She grabbed their hand and pressed it into her chest, "Feel it!" She demanded.

A monster's heartbeat is always thready, thinner than a humans, smaller from their biology and less demanded. But a monster heart beats quickly, what little blood it has moves fast. Before humans became scarce it was a game to compare the similarity between a grown man's heartbeat to that of a human child's. Asriel had taught them that when they were young, and every member of the Dreemurr family (And Aunt Catti, too) had Kris' ear pressed against their chest as they skeptically listened until they discovered the truth. For two, maybe three years Kris had the same heart rate as their father. Before, of course, they grew up.
Susie's heart was beating, consistent in its rhythm and calm under Kris' hand. Three beats per second. "I'm 'sposed to die tomorrow" She said boldly, looking Kris dead in their blood red eyes. No change. Bump, bump, bump every second, steady into Kris' palm. "See? Get owned."

"Damn, okay." Kris conceded. Through their state they felt compelled to take the opportunity to test her honesty.. and maybe antagonize her, "You're also supposed to ride the Ferris wheel with two different dates tomorrow. You wanna sit in the middle? Or.. Should me and Noelle take turns with you?"

Thump! Thumpthumpthump

Kris cracked a wicked smile and gave Susie a knowing look. Susie laughed, shoving them away from her, "Oh, that's it."

"H-Hey!" Kris raised a feeble defense as Susie advanced towards them like a hyena, "I was just testing if y- the accuracy- I- Aah!"

It was too late. She had already pounced, trying to wrestle Kris flat onto their back. "Wait! Wait!" Kris said breathlessly as they tussled. She hadn't realized that Kris had years of experience play fighting with monsters twice their size (and with horns). They retaliated, a single swift jab to her exposed side left her recoiling with a breathy, betrayed laugh. A fatal blow to a sponge like their brother, but Susie was able to recover, mouthing half of their shoulder in a single swift motion. Kris couldn't move their arm, Susie's dull blade-like teeth threatening to clamp if they dared poke at her again.
"Ah! Hey- That's! Definitely cheating!" Kris said, feeling the way Susie 'chewed' on their shoulder with a red-faced smile.

"Too bad" She muffled, grabbing their wrists as they struggled and pinning them. She released their shoulder, only snagging their sweater in a few places, striking a victorious smile "Heh, sorry yet?"

Kris looked up at her, suddenly very very still and quiet. Susie looked down at them with a clueless confusion until she realized the position she had forced them into. She saw the same dizzy, starry eagerness they tried to play off back in Castle town. There was something so charming about them whenever they weren't masking with their puppy-like enthusiasm towards her.

"I'm seriously gonna bite your face off if you keep looking at me like that" She threatened weakly, feeling her blush spread even onto her shoulders.

Kris genuinely thought they were going to swoon, "Is it my birthday or something?"

Susie cracked into laughter, "When I tried to scare you on Wednesday..."

"You weren't flirting with me?" Kris asked, striking a faux-heartbroken expression.

Susie dropped her weight onto them, flopping her head and mass of hair beside theirs, "Ugh, don't embarrass me!" She said, tail thumping in the air above them, "Haha, you're so open about this. I don't know how you do it."

Her pressure was a sort of divine they didn't expect, better than any weighted blanket on the market and more comforting than any teddy bear or reassirance. Her hair smelled like sweet pea body spray with a faint hint of cigarettes. Up close, they could see the different shades of violet her scales had in low lighting. They wished they could stay like this forever. They bumped their forehead against hers. There weren't words to answer her. They had a million different answers, different things they wanted to say to her. Kris wanted to say 'because'. "Because meeting you was... the only good thing that's happened to me...."

Oh fuck. Based on the way Susie stiffened and was staring at them...

"Jesus, Kris.." she breathed, covering her face with a hand. They had fully flustered her into an uncharacteristic silence, a perfect KO.

"I mean. You asked." Good recovery, dipshit.

"You need higher standards."

Kris bit into her auburn hair, "Nah." Perfect response, "Sorry. Standards are 'big' and 'purple' and 'refuses to wear bows'"

She gave them a wistful laugh, pressing her snout against their jaw, "Such a freak" she said affectionately. She could feel them slowing down. Their noisy breathing deepen. Their two heartbeats, already so slow, join in rhythm. She didn't need to look to know they eyes were closed. She listened to them sleep, noticing how their hands mindlessly tangled into her hair, touched her scales, peacefully held her back. As though even at rest Kris was still checking on her, ready with their shield.

"Can you hear me?" She whispered into their chest, staying just as she was, her own yellow eyes drooping closed.
"Be good to Kris tomorrow. I'm counting on you."

Chapter Text

She extended her hand to them, "Wanna try it, bub?" She asked playfully. Kris was off-put by the smell, but the way that Asriel lost his mind at the suggestion was certainly enticing them.
"You're actually kidding, right? They're-"
"What! What?!" She laughed, sucking her teeth and exhaling smoke through her nose like a dragon. "If they want to hang with the big kids they should at least have the choice, right?" She snickered. Asriel grabbed Kris by the hand and toted them off as they protested the entire time. Kris couldn't see her face. It was dark. It was too dark. They reached for her but she was opened up. She was opened up again. Asriel's shield was sticking into...

Kris woke up. That was unquestionably the best sleep of their entire life, wedged between the wall, the mattress, and 180 pounds of friend (and bottles of nail polish they never bothered picking up). When they sat up they were surprised to see Susie was already gone, the only hint of her presence was the lingering smell of her leather jacket and a note in sharpie that flaked off of their forehead and fluttered onto their lap. "Morning leader. Love u but I am not using ur shower." Kris nodded sleepily in agreement, even if it was bittersweet. It would be weird to go to the festival with someone that smelled the same as their mom.

On instinct, they reached for the birdcage, finding it empty, and panicked for a moment before they realized. Their hand covered their heart. They.. slept with the SOUL in? The SOUL *let* them do all of that? Oh GOD, the SOUL was watching the entire time. They looked at their nails, painted a slimy green that they liked even more now that it dried into a shiny gloss. Yesterday was real, wasn't it? The memory, the fight, speaking to the SOUL, the breakdown.. everything else.
It felt surreal, like a fading nightmare. The realization of what they had repressed flooding over them and bringing them back. They finally saw behind the tree. No, that wasn't it, exactly. They saw.. Something they shouldn't have, all those years ago. That memory, that horrific, bleeding hole in their brain was only the tip of the spear. What else were they missing? That memory.. Didn't line up with what must have happened. It was either a fragment or some kind of distortion of the truth. They could almost hear Carol's voice, slippery like ice as she tapped her hooves against the bunker door. She had no reason to lie, her grief was raw and authentic and suffocating. What happened, it had to have-

"Can you hear my thoughts?!" Kris burst out. They had almost completely let their guard down.

A pause.

"No? Good morning.. To you too?" It replied, tone slow and rusty like a junkyard car.

Kris rubbed their eyes, flinching as they touched the bruise on their brow ridge from headbutting the wall. "I'm crazy." They groaned, "Ugh..." They stood up, cracking their back as they stretched. Fuck. Fuck. Today was the festival. They weren't even excited anymore, now they were just anxious. They slumped against the door, willing themselves not to vomit.

The SOUL took its controls again, puppeteering Kris to leave their bedroom. Their body argued, but as they crossed the threshold it became easier. Downstairs their mother was cooking. Waffles with chocolate chips and chopped strawberries. Right. Asriel would be home today.

"Good morning my Sunshine" Toriel said brightly as she doled out a heavy plate, setting it on Kris' placemats as they sat, "... I saw you had some early morning company" she laughed lightly, "Do make sure you thank her for chopping the strawberries, she was quite eager to help."

Kris smiled begrudgingly as they sat at their unofficial seat at the table. Of course she was. It had nothing to do with the strawberry tops that Susie definitely feasted on... Or, based on the amount of dishes on the drying rack, the batch she devoured before leaving. The SOUL presented an expectant pause. A silent threat of 'eat before I make you'. Kris, despite their disdain at the pressure, gave in and ate without much fussing.
"When's Asriel coming in?"

She sat opposite her child, noisily cutting up her modest stacks of waffles, "He has not called. However, when we last spoke, he said that he has classes until six. I expect he will be home late tonight. Maybe he can arrive in time for fireworks"

Kris nodded. Why did they feel relief? The thought of Asriel coming home had filled them with a beam of hope and excitement only a few days ago, but now all they felt was uneasy. They knew why, actually. They knew they would have to look at their brother with the remembrance of the night Dess... The night they lost their SOUL. Remembering their failure to ACT and the sight of the smiling, looping tail. The sight of the shield.

"Uh.." Kris was eager to change the topic. Mouth stuffed with tart strawberries, they used an option the SOUL shuffled towards them, "I'm going to the festival with Noelle and Susie tonight."

They watched a flash of shock appear and serenely hide away in Toriel's eyes as they spoke. "Oh my." She said, smiling warmly, "You have a date tonight?" The Cage carries certain exceptionalities. The one in use now, despite Kris' best effort, was listening to Toriel's thoughts. 'Perhaps that is why they have been behaving so strangely. They are finally blossoming..?'

Kris groaned, "It's not a date." They said, "We're all just friends, is all.." Kissing friends. Who fall asleep holding each other- and kiss each other- and dream about getting their face bitten off- and- "Susie's going with Noelle as a date."

Toriel laughed demurely. 'I wish I could see Carol's face when she realizes'. Kris smirked. It was definitely a sight to behold alright. That part they wished they could share, "I'm happy for her. She seems like a lovely girl, Noelle seems to adore her already." Toriel stood, taking Kris' empty plate. "You should get dressed, I am sure you will not want to be fashionably late."

Kris nodded, and vanished upstairs. They slid their phone out of their pocket and halted, staring at their reflection in the black screen. Right. The SOUL was perched between their lungs, observing. They couldn't make any calls around it. It knew some of their plan, of course, but its prying sense of curiosity clearly wasn't sated, and Kris knew that they needed it to stay oblivious. It was a silent tug of war as they both clearly knew what the other was doing. Kris couldn't stop now, it was far too late. A promise was a promise. An unbreakable thing, that transcended willpower. A promise that could raise the dead.

"Trust me." Kris said aloud, "Just.. Let me do this."
The SOUL was quiet, hands off the controller. Kris understood their answer.
"Listen to me. Listen. Please." They wandered back in front of the mirror, looked into their own eyes. God, they looked... different. A healthy breakfast and ten hours of sleep managed to bring more color and energy to their pallid olive skin than BetterHeal could possibly hope to achieve. They almost didn't recognize themselves- the Cage named 'Kris'. They looked alive.

"Listening."

Kris grimaced. Oh. They hadn't expected to get this far. "I'm on your side. But some stuff is personal."

The SOUL had changed, too. Remembered the last vessels. How the desire to see the ending, exhaust the choices, had overwhelmed and spread like mold on a bible, rendered their world changed in an immutable way.

"..."

Kris still felt their neck rush with blood. It's quiet nature one on one was infuriating to them. They glared into the smeared mirror silently. Tug of war.

"I will.. Protect them." It answered softly, determination seeping into its tone, "My Cage..."

Kris' eyes widened, "No, No No you don't- You don't understand! I would NEVER-"

Toriel around the corner of the stairwell, "Kris...?" She asked, voice laden with concern, "Honey, who are you talking to?"

Kris jumped from the start. "Oh! Uh!" They said, spinning on their heel to face her, "I was.. I-" The SOUL selected an option, "I was.. writing dialog. I've been making a comic and I'm stuck- stuck on a scene. I had to act it out to see if it made sense."

Toriel pursed her lips. A long silence that probably only stretched two seconds, "I am so glad you are drawing again!" She said warmly, "Oh, I remember your drawings you would make of your 'monster self'. Haha, you always were so creative." She shook her head, walking past Kris and the mirror and into her bedroom, "I left you some money on the coffee table."

Kris nodded stiffly, "Thanks, Mom."

Chapter Text

Kris walked haltingly out of the door, unconsciously holding their head higher than normal. They had spent most of the mid-morning trying different ways to hide their bruised forehead. A little hair gel 'borrowed' from Asriel's side of the room rendered that problem solved. Thanks to the fierce battle of the night before, their reliable green hoodie had four snags on the shoulder. Kris took that as a sign to actually put forth some effort into their appearance and wear something different for today.

Kris chose an outfit that they had left hibernating in the back of their closet, unable to muster the effort or strength to wear it out. Baggy midnight blue pants cinched at the waist by a studded belt Dess had given them for their eleventh birthday, a black long sleeved shirt (with thumbholes they sewed themselves), and the pièce de résistance... their new black heeled boots. Made with real leather and only a little worn around the heel. It was a golden snipe from a second hand shop their mom would let them wander around in while she shopped for makeup and perfume next door. The outfit filled Kris with a certain kind of confidence they weren't familiar with. They had always been cautious with their clothing to not stray too feminine or masculine, partly due to preference and partly due to the fear that their identity would be forgotten. But this felt right, finally. It felt like armor over them as they walked down the main road.

They could feel the SOUL breathing in tandem. They hadn't noticed it before. But it breathed within them in slight circle motions, feathers moving against a breeze. Only yesterday this would have revulsed Kris, a biological spiritual impossibility voyeuristically packing itself into their thoracic cavity like a nesting dove in a running engine. Today, however, was another day, and Kris noted the sensation neutrally as another instance of the SOUL's evolution. Or was it always there; now that Kris no longer warred against its existence they freed themselves to observe it in return. Details about its existence that they could notice and use. It could hear them speak now, it breathed , it couldn't read their thoughts, it couldn't lie, it was absolute dogshit at mixing Bloxors, and sometimes it could beam other people's thought into their head.

"Be normal." Kris said aloud.

The SOUL acknowledged this dismissively, making Kris nod their own head.

"Dude." They groaned, pinching the bridge of their nose.

"I am... Very normal." It responded darkly.

"You're like, two seconds from getting shoved in my pocket."

Their one sided dialogue was interrupted as they saw Noelle standing at the Holiday Manor gate, pacing anxiously with her blue dress swishing along with each step. Her blonde hair was perched on her shoulders in tight corkscrew curls, and she even had makeup dusted over her fur. Kris approached, grabbing the wrought iron pole and swinging the gate open for her.

She turned towards them with a start, startled out of her looping thoughts. "Oh! Hey, Hey Kris." She was twisting her silver watch around her wrist with a free hand, her brown eyes staring at their boots.

Kris grimaced before hiding their expression. Her anxiety pissed them off. It wasn't a usual reaction, and Kris searched internally for why they felt so annoyed so instantly by someone who usually only made them feel lonely. Friday. The obvious was unavoidable. Going to her house for the first time in weeks and being told to shove off so she could be alone with Susie.. So she could gossip about how Kris and her weren't actually friends, just neighbors, forced into each other's lives. Like Kris hadn't grown up arm in arm with her. Like they never made her laugh, shared her grief and secrets and been beside her through everything for almost a decade. Just looking at her made them feel small, made them feel guilty.

Oh. Guilty.

Oh god. Oh god.

"W-What's with the look!" She exclaimed, hooves brushing against her cheeks, turning her knees to touch.

Kris didn't respond immediately. The SOUL served options but Kris was quick to shove them aside. Shove everything they were thinking aside, back behind the tree, into the dam. Where it wouldn't hurt them again. "You look good."

Noelle's laugh was airy and awkward, "Hey! Thank you. You look different." She said, "Different in a good way, obviously." She reached and tugged at their belt, "Hey, I recognize this. Geez, remember when you used to wear it like a collar?"

They felt a smile and couldn't hold on to the resentment. Being next to Noelle was awkward, uncomfortable, yet paradoxically easy. Even after they changed so much she still felt like a piece of home. Kris didn't answer her, tilting their head slightly, "Ready for your date tonight?"

When Noelle was excited about something, she would shift her weight from hoof to hoof, what she named in her childhood as- "Oh man, you're doing Space Time Hopscotch." Kris said playfully.

Noelle's jaw went slack as she froze on one hoof, ankle wiggling with her balance, "Kris!! Ha, don't point it out!! Geez, I forgot that's what you called it, fahaha.. I'm SO ready. I- I even.. I even gave myself a pep talk.. A-and a script." She set her other hoof on the ground, smiling like a guilty child. Kris couldn't close themselves to her thoughts. 'They sound so.... real' Kris held their breath. Her thoughts were warm all over inside their skull, 'Thank god, they're finally back to themself'

"You're staring." She noted, ears flattening, "Okayyy.... maybe I'm a little terrified. But in a good way, you know?"

Kris nodded thoughtfully, still feeling the peals of her thought. Real... "I get it." They answered honestly. Giddy terror. That was probably Noelle's favorite emotion after all. When she showed them that puppet ARG when it first updated she was almost crying from fear when she clicked any of the links, and would stifle a maniacal laugh after each gruesome moment. They appreciated that part of her, that unhinged silly side she tried to keep carefully locked away.

"Hey, Kris? Can I ask you something? Something that's been bugging me."

oh no. Their stomach welled up with anxiety. They had so much they needed to say to her, so many ugly, horrible things they needed out of their head.

"We're... um.." She picked at her hooves, shoulders hunching, "We're.." She looked at them expectantly, urgently, her face tense. Her tawny ears were pinned down. Now she was the one who looked small.

No options, she was speaking a language that only Kris knew. They understood completely, releasing their trapped breath. Not even the Angel could read her like they could, and Kris felt a swell of pride at that. "Yes, we are." Kris responded softly, nodding. They were only left with a second to brace themself before Noelle fell against them, squeezing Kris tightly with her hooves flush against their shoulder blades. She smelled like star anise and hazelnut sugar scrub. Kris pressed, "Why wouldn't we be?"

"I don't know. I guess I got insecure." She buried her head in their shoulder, Kris wrapped their arms around her, linking their hands at the small of her back. She sniffed, then lingered, and then she parted from them. Looking shyly into their eyes, Noelle looked relieved, "I think I just needed to hear it, y'know..?"

Her gentle tone, the tender and unguarded way she approached the topic, even the way she traced her hooves across their shoulders as she let them go nearly brought Kris to tears. The resentment and annoyance was gone, powdered into dust and replaced with the desire to set her free and see her finally happy. "Yeah. I get it. I do." They might have needed it as much as her, their shoulders relaxed and their breath easier. They walked to the Festival together, almost close enough to touch shoulders, just close enough that they had the choice.

That yearning didn't go unrecognized to Noelle. She tilted her head, smiling sadly, "I missed you, y'know." She took a nervous breath, her pinky finger brushing along Kris' palm, "I liked... hearing you play the other day. You played a new one, I think it's my new favorite..." She admitted shakily.

Kris cursed the way their face flushed, the uneasy smile they couldn't hide, "Oh! Thanks. Which... Which one?" Had she not thoroughly charmed and deshelled Kris they would have aborted the conversation, maybe pulled her antlers, maybe chased her with a bug. But this tenuous link between them. Both were blindly reaching for the other. Kris couldn't let the moment die.

"Um- It went like this.." She started singing with an open 'ah' to the one tune Kris didn't expect. Seven Four, an original piece they had been constructing chord by chord in their head. They hadn't played it like they usually would. They had frantically played it. It felt like the notes couldn't leave their fingertips fast enough, bursting against the compression of the ivories. The freedom. The control. It felt alive, ringing in the air and purring through their bones. The way Noelle sang to her memory of it made that stringless freedom even more obvious, jumbled notes hungry for open air through her bell-like voice rendered the frenetic piece into a haunting hymnal.

The moment, as private as it was, was cut off by a heavy arm slung around their neck and squeezing their shoulder, " 'Sup nerds." Kris turned to look at her but she was quick to dip from their field of vision, "Makin' a theme song or what?"

"H-Hi! Hi Susie! You look-!!" She let out a hum that turned into nervous bubbly laughter.

"I... Look funny?" She asked, eyebrows pitched up.

"No! No, you look uh!!!! Not funny!" Her wide eyes twitched and slipped to Kris. Kris understood the command. It was their sacred duty as a friend of both of them.

"Dude she's saying you look hot."

Hawkish laughter cracked through the air, Susie shaking Kris hard as Noelle buried her face in her hands. "Hey, thanks Noelle." Kris managed to whip their head around enough to catch a glimpse of her as they lined up for tickets.

Susie's face was beet red from the compliment, looking shyly away from both of them with Kris' favorite flustered smile. Her hair was meticulously brushed and in a massive braid that poured over one of her shoulders and covered up some of the graphic of the cut off band tee she was wearing. Susie caught Kris' devious expression and stared expectantly, eyebrows furrowed.

"Damn Rapunzel." Kris tugged on the end of her braid with their thumb and index finger.

"Ha! Hey, don't mess it up." She threatened, baring her teeth at them as she bat their hand away, "Ra- uh! My buddy spent like, two hours detangling me so hands off!"

From the speakers they were playing classic calliope music, once they passed the gates the grounds felt like another world. The monotony of the same houses were replaced with red striped tents and vendor stalls, push carts with cotton candy, whirling teacups and a one-loop coaster. The air felt electric, the sound of people and the smell of fried food mixed against the ambient slow breeze. Thoughts of guilt and death and Angels couldn't compete against the competing stimuli until they faded completely. It was Just Kris and Susie and Noelle. Kris bought the tickets, knowing that it was their part as a good date (And that Noelle wasn't brave enough to get rider tickets without a little persuasion).

Noelle was still red from Kris' earlier help, but relented to them as they helped her put on her wrist band (hooves were wholly inconvenient for stickers), "Um, your friend from the other school, right?" She asked, nose twitching.

"Yeah!" Susie muffled, trying to put her band on with her hand and peel the back off with her teeth, "Yeah, him. He's always talked about braiding my hair and uh- matching track jackets and stuff. Y'know how guys are."

"I can't believe you let him." Kris snorted, trying to picture the scene. Swatch holding the materials. Lancer waiting his turn.

Noelle's ears swiveled forward, "Wait, Kris... You know him too?"

"Dude he's obsessed with Kris." Susie laughed, only half a step ahead of them.

"Wrong." Kris correctly matter-of-factly. A knee jerk response bitterly wanted to say that if anything, Ralsei obsessed with the SOUL, but.. Now that wasn't entirely true. Kris and Susie had finally cracked his inauthentic facade, and the terrified boy behind it was someone they cared deeply for. Now it finally felt like Ralsei was leaning on Kris instead of the Angel. They could still feel the heat of his tears as they hugged each other tightly, listening to the thunderstorm raging. Hearing him crack jokes and laugh at Kris pawing at the door, talking them through handling their SOUL when they first met. Seeing him sleep like a lamb in a bed covered in spikes, "He likes you probably the same amount. I'm only his favorite by a little." Right, Kris had almost forgotten the promise.

The ring toss booth caught Susie's attention, more importantly, she noticed the massive stuffed banana wearing sunglasses and smoking weed. She had never seen anything more perfect for Ralsei's room in her life. "Aw hell, Noelle, you wanna versus?" She asked eagerly, pointing to the candy striped-stand.

Kris hissed through their teeth, shaking their head, "She doesn't know. Have mercy on her."

Noelle looked anxiously at Susie, then to the booth, wanting to say no out of reflex and overpowering the impulse with a giddy smile and an eager burst of energy that wiggled her shoulders and arms. "S-Sure!"

Kris saluted Susie as she scoffed and called them names. She had no clue, but that was fine. Watching Noelle demolish the hearts of men and women alike was one of their favorite parts of the Festival. Sadly, this was the perfect moment for Kris to slip away to make good on the promise.

They snuck off, weaving between vendors, dodging Berdly and Snowy as they bobbed for apples with vigor. They followed their nose like a dog until they reached it.

Susie had never, ever in her life felt such a devastating blow to her ego. "You cheated!" She exclaimed in disbelief as Noelle held her grand prizes, a heavy dozen of the chintziest necklaces, bracelets, and a tiara with blue glass 'jewels'.

Noelle presented Susie with a bracelet with bright rubber 'spikes' on it, feeling victorious, "Fahaha, you wish! Here, I 'knight' you, Sir Susie."

Susie looked at the bracelet with pursed lips, "Ugh, anything but a knight." She sighed. It *would* look cool with her outfit... "Eh, what the hell, sure thing, Princess."

Noelle dropped the bracelet into the tamped grass the instant she heard it. She had so much blood in her cheeks and ears that she nearly fainted when she dropped to pick it up, "H-Huh???????"

"That's... That's who knights people, right? Princesses and queens and stuff? Right?" Susie laughed nervously, based on the reaction she was sure she had just totally messed it up.

"RIGHT. RIGHT YEAH." Noelle exclaimed, slipping the bracelet onto Susie's wrist, heart pounding in her ears and knees wobbling together.

" 'Scuse." Kris reappeared between them, making Noelle scream. "For the madamses." They said bluntly, presenting two shiny candy apples. One was white chocolate with cinnamon sugar crunchies on it, the other chocolate chips stuck into caramel. "Susie. Take one, from a secret admirer."

Noelle was so grateful Kris reappeared she almost kissed them on the spot. "Oh! Haha, who's mine from, then?"

"Me, duh."

She froze, hand touching the stick of the white chocolate apple cautiously to avoid making a mess, "Huh? Aren't you supposed to say... -Oh! Fahaha, I get it now. There really is a secret admirer?? Susie... you're really popular!"

"Who the HELL is the secret admirer?!" Susie asked, almost stunned enough to not immediately snatch the caramel chocolate apple to start eating all of the chocolate chips off of it. Almost.

"A secret. Dumbass." Kris said, deadpan, leaning towards Noelle. She tilted her apple towards them wordlessly, knowing the routine.

"It's Prince." Kris answered, mouth full and wiping the chocolate on their pants. They watched as Susie as she raked her massive fangs across the skin of the apple to get the caramel, "He made me promise you'd get something sweet from him."

"Tsh, figures. Stupid peach boy, he's such a- Sometimes I wanna just- shake him!!! Now I gotta figure out a way to out-nice him! I tried to win him that Stoner Banana at ring toss but..." Her husky voice barely rose above the ambient, cheery music playing overhead as she gestured broadly to Noelle.

Noelle jingled the bracelets on her wrist playfully, holding her apple like a wand, "I didn't go easy, by the way."

"Knew it would be a blood bath." Kris said somberly, "Don't let her friendly face trick you." They pat Susie on the shoulder, "Gaming... is her life."

Noelle gasped, wrinkling her nose as she bumped her hip against Kris, "No! I wouldn't say that!"

"How many hours of Cat Petterz do you have? Wait, actually... How many mods do you have installed on The Tims..? Hmm, how many texture packs have you made for Minecrap again? I can't remember..." Kris asked with a sly antagonism. Susie smirked, watching Kris and Noelle bicker. She liked seeing Kris like this. When they were at peace they had an edge to them, a teasing coyness that popped up when they were eager to engage. Their voice would get just a tone or two deeper and they would emote with their hands like a cat batting yarn. They were a real gremlin, honestly. And Noelle, although she was much more timid... She seemed like she had a devil in her too, somewhere deep. The way she bit her tongue and smiled at herself halfway through ring toss told Susie more about her than a few months of being classmates had. Noelle also had that fire in her eyes, even if she was raised in an ice box.

Kris and Noelle made quick work of their candy apple, almost as fast as Susie ate hers, listening to the rhythmic roar of the coaster behind them. Noelle, eyes wide, nervously held it out to Susie as a swordsman would hold a blade to the dragon (except for a noticeable tremble), "H-Hey, uh! Do you want the... uh.... The last bite?"

An indirect kiss is the moment when two lips meet at a neutral ground, separated by time but not by intent. A method of transferring a kiss as a letter is sent between distant lovers. An indirect bite, however, is when Susie clamps down on stick and core alike while you hold it and try not to black out. Noelle felt like a hot kettle. Kris nudged her affectionately, "Drooling." They whispered.

"Huh????" She shook her head, pulling herself together as Kris watched Susie obliviously eat the rest of the wooden stick, clearly pleased with herself. 'Cheezus this is the best day in my life,'

Kris pointed to the coaster. Their expression was obvious to Noelle. A silent conversation. No time to get dizzy staring at girls. It was time to get dizzy with girls. Kris' expression did not add that it was also time to... not hear any more of Noelle's thoughts.

The rest of the afternoon felt like a piece of Heaven. Learning that Susie was actually terrified by rollercoasters, her crackling screaming nearly ripped the sky in half. Learning that Noelle still clung to Kris like they personally were keeping her from getting thrown to the ground. Learning that they could still feel alive in the Light World. And maybe also learning that some of the prizes were really easy to steal... The thought of death and prophecy was nowhere to be found. They were only thinking about how rigged skeeball was and how much they wanted to be with Susie and Noelle on the Ferris wheel and maybe what kissing a deer monster AND a dragon might feel like.

Noelle passed the last few sips of her slushy to Kris, who gave her a thumbs up, her breath making tiny puffs from the cool air and her tongue dyed neon blue. "You guys.." She said, standing between them in the bustling line, "I can't remember the last time I've had so much fun"

Susie linked her hands behind her head, "Yeah, today wasn't a bad time, huh?" She sighed, contented. Kris only answered her with a smile, feeling comfortable in the silence.

The fairground worker opened the Ferris wheel door and Noelle was hopping from hoof to hoof. Susie clambered in, having to duck her head in order to fit inside. Noelle hesitated with her hand on the glossy red door. She turned to Kris, "Well? C'mon..." She said in a whisper. Kris stared at the ground, feeling their limbs frozen in place. But Noelle wasn't backing down so easily, "Kris! Get in there!"

The SOUL moved Kris into the car like a chess piece, and sat them down beside Susie and the window, the foam rubber seat squeaking under their shared weight. Noelle entered after them, daintily placing herself on Susie's other side, sitting on the edge of the seat to avoid making her tail loudly thump against the metal backing. She was shaking, too. Where Kris only had a tremble along their arms and hands, Noelle shivered when she was nervous. Buck teeth chattering, full chills with a big smile as she pulled the lap bar down.

Susie was slowly starting to recognize both of their building eager nerves, their flushed faces, the fidgety avoidant ways they both were looking out opposite windows. Her yellow eyes narrowed down, the gears in her head turning.

Wait...

Did these two... have .. Was this a...?

They were totally going to flip the car to prank her!!

Those bastards. She knew she had to beat them to the punch as the car started moving.

"Hometown looks so beautiful, doesn't it?" Noelle asked, voice dreamy.

"Small." Kris said.

"Like a model train town." Noelle added.

Susie peeked out of Kris' window. The lake, reflecting the tangerine sunset, the flower shop, the city across the water already outshining. Noelle's window; the town and all of its houses, the cemetery waiting quietly, Noelle's massive ass mansion cut out of the orange forest, and the bunker.

The bunker? There was an amber lamplight, barely perceptible from a glint coming from the bunker in a thin curve.

She steeled her mind. It wasn't the time to think about it. Anything but whatever hellish nightmare was lurking hungrily under the town. It was time to think-

"Kris!" Noelle scolded as the car started rocking. Her hands braced against the window and the headrest as they swiveled back and forth.

Kris was caught unaware. They lurched as the car rocked, smacking their forehead against the glass, sending them crashing back against Susie. They looked up, seeing her shark toothed smile and proud expression as she managed to tilt the car almost on its side.

"Forgot your helmet, jackass" Susie teased as the car noisily swung from side to side with a momentum.

"SUSIE!!!" Noelle exclaimed, wrapping her arm around her as she slid around against the smooth bench, accidentally headbutting her velvety antlers into Susie's cheek and neck, making Susie let out a squawk of surprise.

Kris laughed. Not their usual laugh. A real laugh. An actual uncontained and fiendish sound of them losing themselves in the moment. Both Susie and Noelle were disarmed by it. Susie having never heard it and Noelle having nearly forgot Kris could laugh at all. Kris' red eyes were set on Noelle, and she read their expression loud and clear, "Get her, Noelle."

"AAH! I didn't mean to- I-!" Noelle protested with a lightheaded laugh, moving her antlers away. Kris wrapped their arms around Susie, stopping her from completely flipping the car, "Augh, betrayed!" She said, trying to move her head to bite their hand. Cheating? Oh absolutely. A violation of the bro code for sure, at least. But it was a trump card.

From Noelle's perspective, all she saw was Kris, in their childish madness, perfectly package and present Susie to her.. And Susie leaning down, leaning in. Her heart pounding in her ears and her limbs feeling like racetracks, she once again fought and overcame her desire to hide.

As the hard and fast rocking of the car slowed, she felt Noelle's cold nose bump against her snout before she met her in a tender kiss, her lips initially stiff. Susie gasped through her nose as she felt Noelle's lips brush against hers. She gave in to Noelle's magnetic pull, the warmth coming from her face and the spiced smell of her perfume...and returned her kiss with the same enthusiasm. Noelle's stiff posture melted the longer they kissed, and Susie guided her gently. The insurmountable, impossible moment had arrived with a spontaneity neither of them expected. Noelle parted from her, hiding her face in her hands as she couldn't hide her manic bubbly laughter. Susie, bright red from what just happened, wondered if that was a normal reaction.

Kris unhanded Susie, still out of breath with an ambient air of joy, "My turn." They said, monotonous tone somehow laden with intention. Still they were acting as the party tactician, even slightly punch drunk from hitting their head in a churning metal wheel.

Noelle's moony eyes peeked through her fingers, her ears forward. As if the moment couldn't get stranger! Although, if she was more than happy to share a candy apple and a slushy with them, what was a kiss? Their relationship was so weird and nebulous, escaping any attempts to define or boundary, it couldn't hurt to share a little more. So... " What the heck, sure!" She pulled Kris forward by their shoulders, over Susie's legs. She started with just a peck, testing the waters. Then Kris took the reigns and pushed back into her, feeling the split in her lip feather against their cupid's bow, the sensation of her lipstick smudging against them, the lingering taste of pineapple slushy. Noelle was moving confidently, mirroring the knowing way Kris gently took her lower lip against their teeth. It sent static through her core and pooling in her hooves until she had to back out, smiling with a stupefied giggle, slumping against the window and fogging it up.

"Hey uh.. That was cute an' all, but I think... Heh." Susie bit back a snort of laughter, smirking widely. Nah, Noelle could have this moment, she earned it. Her heart was racing too, she felt like she could have turned into Susiezilla at any moment, crunching hometown under her palms and turning the lake into a splashpad. She saw that Kris, too, looked like they had changed from the moment. Seeing their ruby eyes looking bright and unclouded against their olive skin, the tension they carried in their shoulders and legs had dissolved into something looser and unburdened as they leaned against their window. Hell, they were even smiling. Smiling at nothing. Laughing. Was this the Kris that Noelle had told her about? She liked both versions, she reasoned, but getting to see the happier version felt like a lucky pull from a gotchy ball thing.
She threw her arm over Kris, "C'mere idiot."

Kris rebelled, biting her jaw as she pulled them towards her with their comparatively nubby teeth. She tugged them back, "Hey! Asshole, don't make me get my axe!" She threatened lightly, her hand on their jaw briskly moving to reposition Kris against her snout. No escape. Kris had a flash of something in their eyes that Susie saw. Something warm and devilish that she saw on Friday in Castle Town. She lost her nerve. She growled. How did Kris know just what to do to completely disarm her? They had been friends for less than a week and it felt like Kris was able to read her mind.

With the Ferris wheel winding back to the ground floor, they found themselves tracing the lines on her braid as they kissed her. They couldn't help themselves, seeing the slight pout that came with her apprehension and feeling the incredible pull of her open armed friendship. They tried to speak that unspoken language, pushing the words silently out of their mouth and into hers. Saying it over and over.

"Guys, the door" Noelle said. She shook Kris, "GUYS!!!" She exclaimed, and they recognized the door might have been open for more than a few seconds, the people waiting to enter looking uncomfortably away from the scene. Noelle stood up, antlers scraping against the roof, gesturing for their exit. Susie, caught and embarrassed, scuttled out quickly, followed by Kris.

Noelle stepped onto the threshold of the ride, one of her hooves slipped into the gap. She stumbled, arms outstretched, and Kris caught her by her forearm and pulled her back up. It was a quick moment, lasting only a second at most, but it was what Kris said that caused the reaction.
"Oop, watch, Ellie."

Both of them caught it as soon as it left their mouth. Noelle and Kris on the bottom step of the Ferris wheel, looking shocked and staggered and at one another. They both, in that moment, felt like children. Free to reunite. The little devil and the angel, chasing each other up the stairs, kissing each other's band-aids, drawing comics at church. Nostalgic and warm like a Christmas tree skirt. But they were different now, older and taller and stripped of their costumes by life. But they were still Kris and Noelle.

And Susie. "Ellie, huh?" She knowingly interjected into their tenderness, smirking.

Chapter Text

Noelle parted from Kris with a tight squeeze and a smile that said 'I'll see you tomorrow'. Then it was Kris and Susie, standing shoulder to shoulder.
"Hey, that was fun." Susie said lowly, her voice low against the music, hand squeezing Kris' thin arm. "You wanna hit the road?"

"We can see the fireworks from my window..." Kris nodded before the remembrance struck. Oh, right, "Wait! Asriel is on his way!"

Susie smiled, "Hey, can I meet him?" As they left the festival, she couldn't help but drag her feet once they reached the cross roads. "Oh! Wait- .. Hold up, Kris..."

Her head was turned away, towards the end of town. The breeze was making her braid move like a serpent's tail. "I saw something, y'know, from the Ferris wheel. Something in front of the bunker."

Here it was. The inevitable. Kris tightened their hands into fists, "... What did you see?"

Susie took a breath, sliding her hands into her pockets, "I dunno. It looked like a lamp light, kinda. Like the old yellow street light kind." She felt her chest break into goosebumps, "We should investigate it before we go."

Kris looked down, long shadows cast down along their body. "I don't- I don't think we should, Susie." They were quiet, barely able to raise their voice above the chirping crickets and distant music.

"Huh? But..." She looked at them, expression softening. Oh. Their 'fearless' leader was, after all, only human. They were scared. Of course they were. Kris was almost frozen in place, refusing to look at anything but the dark streets. "We-... We can go tomorrow, right? Bright and early. Hey, I'll even lead the way!"

They didn't answer. Kris didn't even move. That careful over-painting of the still life was gone, and Kris had seen what was lurking underneath. The SOUL, knowing or otherwise, deprived them of the peace of ignorance. They knew now, the memory over three years old but burning fresh without the protective dam. The red shards, spilling from her open chest. Asriel's desperate, heart wrenching shrieks as they watched her die. Would they scream too? Would Susie-

That wasn't everything, was it? What happened after? When the ink flowed? How and why did it, that great wretched *it*, let them walk away, unscathed? How did...

Aren't You Forgetting Something?

"KRIS!" Susie exclaimed breathlessly, shaking their shoulders. "Come on, stop it!"

Their slender hand reached and grabbed her at wrist, blinking back to reality, "Sorry- sorry!" They coughed out, shaking their head, "I- I just remembered that-" They couldn't say anything else, "I was- I s-saw..." Kris grimaced at their own shortcomings. Tell the fucking truth, they felt trapped in their own cage, touching her yet miles underground, "The knight.. I'm not ready." They looked up and caught her disturbed expression, "I'm.. not ready. Susie, I... I'm scared."

This was something different, wasn't it? Susie felt her muscles wound tight as she looked at their hand wrapped around her wrist. It had to be. The "big secret" that Kris implied was enough to kill their friendship. Kris had been scared around her before, fighting that creepy puppet left them looking rattled. She'd seen their hands shaking against the leather grip of the shield fighting against the statue. That was fear, but what Susie just caught.. It wasn't normal fear. It left Kris as a child looking into the dark. She refused to let herself be another reason they hid behind the mask. She could investigate on her own.

"Don't worry, Kris, let's just hit the hay. 'Sides, I wanna meet Mister 'God Of Hyperdeath'" She played it cool, snickering as she looped her hand around their arm and guided them the other direction.

Kris was awash in relief and maybe a little glint of Hope. She was different, wasn't she? Different in the Real way. "God, you're so..."

Susie ticked her head towards them as they passed under rows of glowing streetlamps, "What was that, punk? I'm what, huh?"

"You're just so.. Good. You're just fucking good." Kris groaned, rubbing their forehead against their sweaty palm, the bruise dully sore on their fingertips, "You're a better person than anyone I've.. You're just-". They were too shy to say it, what they had been telling her the whole night without the actual words.

Her flustered expression was dramatic with the night's shadows streaking across her face, "Geez! Don't butter me up, I already agreed to wait!" She said, looking at the sidewalk, at Kris' boots, at ANYTHING other than Kris, notice ANYTHING other than the complimentary way their green nails looked against her skin or how warm they were being to her. "'Sides, I just.. Uh, I just suck less than everyone... is all.."

"Also we- you probably gotta let the SOUL outta the cage. I can't believe how long you went without it."

"Uh," Kris felt hot around the collar. She diffused them well enough but she was managing to dance on every sensitive topic, "It's. It's in."

"Wait! Huh? Like, the whole time???" She whipped her head towards them, hair standing on end. Kris nodded. She leaned in, "So like-"

They were quick to cut her off, "It was..." They hated how they didn't want to say 'behaved', how they were actually considering it as something other than a parasite. It pissed them off that its bizarre act of kindness the night before had actually swayed them in some way, "I was in control all day. It didn't say anything."

Susie nodded, deep in thought, "Right, but like... Y'know." She said, gesticulating her free hand, "It's like... Did I technically just kiss the Angel of Prophecy? Like Technically?"

Kris clutched their chest dramatically as though her words wounded. There was no answering her in a way enthusiastic enough in disagreement, so they made a fake retching sound in response. They contemplated jumping down a manhole! or maybe walking out into the lake! Kris, however, heard their own voice add to the answer enthusiastically, "No!!"

Then they had to laugh. The absurdity was compounding and it was all so stupid. Of course. Of course it felt the same way. Susie laughed too, unaware that the growling deep tone of the answer was anything other than Kris' dramatics.

Approaching the Dreemur house, Kris perked up, seeing Asriel standing in front of bag chairs. Now they were the one dragging Susie up the street, almost tripping over their own feet to reach him until they were in striking distance. Asriel swooped up Kris into a tight hug, Susie observing from the yard, "Hey! There you are, Bub!" He exclaimed, his voice boisterous and breathy, tousling his favorite sibling's brown hair.

To Susie, Asriel was still pretty damn similar to Ralsei. Snowy fur, smile, round metal glasses, dressing in an oversized sweater that looked hand knit. Hell, Asriel even had a golden Deltarune necklace that rested on his chest. They both looked like huge nerds. Of course, the differences were much more obvious than the old photo let on. The short blonde beard, the white horns that grew upward and inward with a J hook curve, and the surprising height of him were all very different. And, probably most different were their voices; where Ralsei was soft spoken and somewhat nasal, there was something very theater-kid about Asriel's speaking voice that she KNEW she wasn't allowed to comment on without risking Kris making her wear all-ribbon armor for life.

Kris pointed to Susie, who immediately stood up straight (a force of habit). "So this is her, right? Hey, Susie-Q! Nice t' finally meet you, call me Azzy." To her dismay she was also subject to her second bear hug from an over eager goat boy. He smelled like the cinnamon applesauce that would sometimes be in the cafeteria, which she found endearing if only because it was funny.

"Uh! Hi!" She said awkwardly, politely pushing away her new overly friendly dorkwad acquaintance, "Nice to uh. Finally meet you too," The air hung heavy where she wanted to call him by his gamertag, but. She wanted to be nice to Kris.

The first firework had started, and Asriel held out a puffy pair of headphones to Kris, who nodded in appreciation and slid them over their ears as they slid into a chair. Susie smirked, cocking her head. "Isn't the loud explosion sound like. The whole point of fireworks?

Kris answered her with two fingers. Okay that was fair. She sat next to them and watched the show, unimpressed with light world fireworks after seeing her face in rainbow bursts in Cyber Field. But hey, Kris looked like they were feeling back to normal again and it was kinda interesting to watch Asriel out of the corner of her eye. He was so... There was something off-putting about him. Maybe it was his eyes, cat like and yellow. Or his friendliness. Maybe, she reasoned, he was just too close to looking like Toriel and Ralsei that it creeped her out.

Oh shit. She knew she was caught as he cocked his head to the side, returning her look with a gentle smile, "I know, I know. We're almost identical, right?" He teased, his hand on the back of Kris' chair as they were already curled and asleep.

"Heh, no... You just look like someone I know, is all." She said with a rusty tone as the finale banged above the tree line.

Asriel shot her a charmed smile, "No kidding," he said, "I hope it's someone you like!"

She rolled her eyes, "I guess you could say that, yeah. He's pretty okay." She saw him stand and stood too, folding the chair up. She pat Kris on the shoulder, "Hey dumbass, let's get."

"They can't hear you" Asriel reminded her, "and even if they could, Kris is the heaviest sleeper I've ever met. I used to think humans hibernated like bears." As though part of an ancient routine they picked Kris up like a package, "Don't worry, I got 'em"

She smiled. It made sense that Kris was so affectionate towards him. "Well it was nice to meet ya b-"

"Hold up! You're not walking are you?" He asked, eyebrows knit, "It's past midnight and you're all by yourself. No way. You can take the couch or I can drive you home." He smiled at her frustrated expression, "Hey, it's what big brothers do, y'can't blame me!"

The way he spoke was assertive. Susie wanted to tell him to pound sand and that SHE was the danger that prowled the streets but... despite her nature she really wanted to make a good impression. No, beyond that. That necklace he was wearing, and all of the talk Father Alvin did about how involved he was. This was her chance to finally get more information about what the hell they were about to face. So she relented.

When he came back downstairs she was standing in the warm living room looking at the stand where Tenna sat that now housed a lamp in the living room.
"Hey, Azz, can I actually talk to you about somethin'?"

"Sure thing." He shifted his weight, half of his body shadowed in the kitchen. She didn't like the look he was giving her, familiar and soft blanketing some kind of, what, pity? It scratched her as too familiar. "Y'know, you remind me of someone too."

"Someone cool?"

He huffed, smile straining as he seemed to reminisce, "The coolest."

Susie smirked. What was this guys deal, anyway? "Your necklace... Uh, I know you were super into church stuff. I just went for the first time in years yesterday..." She trailed off, finding her nervousness mounting, "So.. Can I ask you stuff about it? The prophecy?"

"No."

The air went icy around her.

"Huh?" She looked up at him, surprised by his answer, and his expression chilled her surprise into fear. Yellow brows drawn tightly together, eyes wide like he was staring down the barrel of a gun. A primal emotion, protective and burning. He advanced towards her, seizing her by the shoulders, his paws ruffling the fabric of her jacket. He was now only a few inches from her face, close enough that he peered straight into her eyes over his brass glasses.

"Listen to me."

She held her breath, too stunned to do anything but comply.

"You will not. You will not do whatever you're planning. Listen to me close, Susie. You will not. Do you get it? Do you understand me?"

"G-get offa me" She threatened weakly, shoving her sweaty palm against his chest. She was trembling, too blindsided to ACT.

"Susie." He shook her, "Look at me." He demanded in a whisper, "You will die if you do this. You'll die, and Kris will have to watch it happen."

Her feet moved to back up but he was much, much stronger than her. He pressed, his voice low and serious. It rolled over her like thunder, "Don't do this to yourself, kid. Your whole life is ahead of you."

"The fuck is wrong with you?!" Susie snapped, pushing him with strength. He released her, but his burning expression didn't falter, "W-What do you know about me!"

He wiped tears from under his glasses, "I know that you're playing with stuff that you- that we can't understand. Kris talks to me, y'know. They don't... They don't-" He glanced quickly behind him, then spoke in a whisper, "They don't get it either. It's a suicide mission. That's the good ending, d'you hear me? At the end of that tunnel... The best thing that can happen is that you turn to dust. At the.. Fuck" He whipped his glasses off and rubbed his weepy eyes, composure cracking like glass. "You don't have to trust me. You don't have to believe me. But. For Angel's sake think about what you're doing."

The end of the tunnel? Her heart was thumping hard and jackrabbit fast, "You.. Were in the bunker, huh?"

Asriel didn't respond, just continuing to wick away tears as he lost his resolve to yell at her.

She pressed forward just a little, "I get it. The.. The knight-"

He cut her off with a sharp sob. He covered his mouth, hunching forward in rolling mournful tears that wouldn't stop. Susie released a breath, staring in confusion at the man before her, feeling uncomfortable and cringing at him and how own reaction. "God, you're pathetic, man." She grumbled. Despite her instincts screaming at her take this opportunity to counter, there was something so pitiful about a grown man reduced to tears. And maybe, although she wouldn't admit the connection, him crying reminded her of Ralsei, "Pull yourself together" So she just stood there, waiting for whatever was happening to him to slow down enough that she could talk. What happened to him, down there?

Finally, with a sniff of composure and a hard breath he seemed to pull himself together. And then it was like he was never crying in the first place, aside from the raw pink tone under his fur around his eyes, "How'd you get that...?" He asked, pointing to her cut knuckles.

"W... Whuh? This? I... I smashed a window." She answered quietly, once again off balance by his shift of tone.

"In a dark world." Asriel said resolutely. Susie nodded sheepishly. His mouth formed a tight line, "And how much worse was your hand in the dark world, huh?"

The question perplexed her, and she looked at her scraped knuckles. They were hurt, definitely. Scraped with crescent shaped, jagged scabs surrounded by yellowish bruises. But he was right, wasn't he? Her hand in the dark world was pouring blood, the tops of her fingers were torn to shreds, "I.. I guess they were.... Wait, wait wait." She looked up as the realization of what he said struck her, "You KNOW?"

Frantically, he hushed her, "Quiet, quiet, God's sake. Don't let Kris hear you."

"You- What, you think they don't already know?!"

"I'm- I'm just hoping they don't REMEMBER!" He snapped in a harsh whisper.

She sighed, rubbing her eyelids. What did any of this mean. "Listen, I don't care what happened to you, man. Sorry you didn't get to be the hero. But.. Me 'n Kris, we're it. We're the ones. We gotta do this, alright? We gotta save the world."

He hissed loudly through his teeth, clutching his pale yellow hair as though he was seized by madness, "Ugh, It;s all so-!!" He breezed past her, opening the front door and dragging her along with him until they were back in the yard. With the door shut tightly, they felt safe enough to speak.

"Do you think you're the first? Huh?"

She snarled at him, ripping her arm out of his grasp, "What!?"

"Do you think you're the first girl who tried to play hero?"

His expression, his body language. She didn't know what the hell he was getting at, but how he said it.. His words cast a sickening shadow on something she couldn't see, and the way his face twitched when he said it... And what he said earlier, remember? Why the hell would Kris NOT remember going to the dark world with her?

"You asked me about... About my necklace." Asriel continued, swallowing hard. The golden Deltarune was pulled from his neck and placed in her open palm. It was heavy, the metal warm from his body heat. It looked like it had been weathered by years of daily wear, the triangles of the runes rounded and the metal more dull where it would have brushed against his skin, "That was hers."

A calloused finger thumbed across its surface, she looked at her own warped reflection in the gold, "Oh.."

"She can't wear it now. Not ever again." He put his hand on her shoulder again, but this time his touch was soft, guiding, "She had.. her whole life ahead of her."

Susie hated herself. She hated herself for the first thought that surfaced to her mind as she realized that girl, whoever she was and wherever she may be resting, was dead. A thought so blackened and dirty and sacrilegious that she would never, ever, ever admit it. Not even to herself.

Better her than me.

It shocked her, and she made herself forget.

"What happens in the dark world. It's not exact, but the effects... They carry over all the same. I know your hand hurts way worse than it looks. You'll die there, and you'll die in the light world..."

She grimaced. She wanted to shake his hand off of her again and give him a swift kick. The Deltarune in her hand was heavy, the chain sliding between the webbing of her injured fingers. "I.. I get that.."

Her thoughts drifted to Kris. How they looked so vulnerable when the SOUL first revealed their countless deaths to them, how it made them realize those moments were real. Yet Kris lived. Kris was alive and sleeping soundly in their bed, pockets full of stolen prizes, but Kris died. Hundreds of times from the sound of it. Had... had she died, too? Had Susie died, the same as this girl?

Did it matter?

"I've been through this before. I was right where you are. Thinking that... that you're special. That you can save the world before you go to your first prom..." Asriel sighed, the long bridge of his nose crinkling as he looked like he was fighting something, looking at the Deltarune in her hand, "Susie, you *are* special. I haven't felt Kris this... at peace... in years, all because of your friendship. You've got a lot of people here that love you. And- and I think it'd be a damn shame if you let yourself die and miss out on all of that."

Why was she choking up? This guy, this stranger to her. The audacity, to drag her out of the one place she felt safe, threaten her, try everything to scare her... But what she was realizing was that, yeah, for the first time in her life she was loved. Ralsei loved her. Toriel loved her. Lancer loved her. Kris was sharing their bed and family with her like it was second nature. God, was this what being loved was like? That hearth-warmed sensation of wanting, demanding things to get better, to BE better? Trusting that they would be there, making it better with her? Hearing him say it stoked her hope for the future, made her axe of justice lighter than air in her pocket.

"I'm not." She said quietly. Her first wrapped around the Deltarune, the chain wrapping around her fingers, "I-I'm not! Nobody is dying. Nobody is a sacrifice."

Asriel clasped his hands in prayer, palpable relief in his muscles, "Thank you, angel above for-"

"Because that prophecy isn't what you think it is!!"

Chapter Text

The hands clasped in prayer slacked as he looked at her, annoyed at her baited response, "Susie, I studied this prophecy for my whole life. I've read the doctrine, I-I've even seen the original glyphs. How- how do you think you, someone who literally doesn't even go to church..." Now he was grimacing, reading the pure sincerity on her face.

"'Cause listen, the Prince of the prophecy taught me a lot.. A lot about reading too closely. About taking it all too literally. About- y'know, acting like there's not a choice."
Her hand dug into her pocket, "I met the Old Man... Not.. I mean, not really. But I met his spirit, I guess, at the church's Dark World. Gerson. The guy who wrote the Dragon Blazers books. Heh, he was a preacher and it sounded like he didn't believe in the prophecy at all." She said brightly, "He gave me this." She pulled out her Justice Axe and presented it proudly.

A calligraphy brush. The horsehair tip was stained from heavy use, the body made of a shining white abalone material that was worn in the middle where a smaller palm would have rested.

Asriel stared at the brush in disbelief, listening closely.

There was a blaze inside of Susie now as she looked at the brush, breath quickening. A brush to write with? A brush to write with! He gave her a brush to write with!! To make her own ending!

"Me an' Kris? We're gonna make out own ending and come out the other side, you hear me? I got the brush to make it happen and Kris has the will to get there with me."

She tapped the Angel of the Deltarune with her thumb, "I mean.. I gotta be honest with you, man." She gave him a smile, "I'm not scared of the dark, and I don't believe in lying down and dying."

Blankly, he kept looking at her. Was he convinced? Or, was the weight of failing to save a single girl from the meat grinder weighing on him?

Her bravado deflated slightly, "You... Totally don't believe me." Reluctantly, she looped the Deltarune back around his head to rest above his heart, "I get it. But I believe me, man, with everything I got."

That iron-hot will, he could see it in her. It shined. Did he believe her? It didn't matter. He had lived with the hollow aftermath of believing in 'the girl with hope crossed on her heart'. She had no idea what she was facing, "What... has Kris told you, exactly? About the dark worlds?"

"What do you mean? We always go in together... Wait! Wait, Kris was.. with you in the dark world?"

Asriel squinted his eyes shut, nodding guiltily.

"They never mentioned it..." Her voice had an edge to it. Suspicious of whatever truth he was hinting at, whatever this nebulous 'thing' Kris was forced to hide from her. She sighed, shaking her head. She trusted Kris, she refused to let doubt creep in, "Listen man, if you want to stop us, you can't.. But you can tell me what you know. Give us the best shot."

She felt like she was torturing him for information with the way he was anxiously grinding his teeth, "I-I can't. I can't. There's some stuff that.. That Kris is better off not remembering. Angel's mercy let them forget it."

The realization dawned on her like a midnight sun, "Kris... They saw what happened, what happened to that girl, huh? Or was it worse than that?"

Tears were rolling down his stony face, she caught a glint reflecting off of his wet fur under the street light, "She wasn't the only one hurt that day."

--
They had everything just right according to the prophecy.

The Lord of Screens. That was the beginning of the end. The cataclysm felt like it spanned an endless year, but it took less than three days. Three days is all it took to go for two fifteen year olds with hopes and dreams to be irreparably damaged. Victims of the prophecy. Victims of their own hubris, their gambling with God. They cloyed themselves with the knowledge of what was coming next. They had thought themselves so clever, too, for how they devised their way to win. Not just this darkner, or this dark world, but all of them.

Their dark worlds weren't the result of random chaos, of darkness shifting over the physical by unseen forces. They were artisan made by the two of them.
Curation took place over days, an arranging of a dark art exhibition. Choosing the objects. Organizing the space. Easy. The hardest part was getting the kids to play along. Introducing them to Kris and Noelle had to be done just right. Kris was always quick to spin a situation if it had a chance of causing a reaction. Each time they played with the toys, they reinforced their roles, and it strengthened the darkner. Like making gingerbread monsters, molded to their needs.

Noelle, at least, was gleefully willing to go along with the big kids. Most of her darkners succeeded in being molded by her care and attention. The plum colored kitty doll that Asriel helped Dess sew was gifted to her one evening during an elated, elevated story of the Great Magician Prince and his wonderful, tricky sidekick. That was their most intelligent move yet, even if both of them wouldn't admit that it made them feel a little guilt settle on their shoulders once they met him in person. But she made him so strong that way, when she showed Kris they (as children often do) built off of each other during play that he was a master of his magical craft by the end of the month.
Noelle's toys loved her. They loved. They had been fed and clothed and played with until they thought of themselves like the Velveteen Rabbit. And Noelle always played with them just right when she was alone.

It made them easy targets.

It was easy to get stronger that way.

Electing the Lord of the Screens was easy because of that. Dess' desktop was a hotbed of LiveBleak, roleplay forums, drafted and abandoned runaway letters, Silent Chills games, paranoid recordings that were getting worse, and Angel forbid whatever she WASN'T open to sharing with Asriel. And there was NO way in hell that Asriel was willing to sacrifice his computer for the cause, having spent the better part of two years saving up for it.

What did Noelle do on her computer? She played games about loving and raising kittens, she kept a blog that auto played her favorite Christmas song. Harmless, joyful activities. The riskiest things they ever saw her do was download mods for different colored fur patterns. When they took the computer to the basement they expected it to a light load, no more than an hour or two before they would cleave it in half with Dess' longsword. Then Azzy would leave and bring Kris, who would seal the fountain with their human SOUL. All according to the prophecy, down to the letter. Rehearsed like a chamber choir piece, ready to be executed.

The deck of cards, the cat doll, the computer, and all of the Christmas decorations were spread across the cement floor. December clambered down the basement steps with heart pillows in her arms, her steel toed boots loud against the floor. "I don't think we'll need 'em, but, I brought some anyways." She said.

Asriel plugged the computer in and clicked through the log in screens, "Ya ready Dess? Only like, one more after this."

How horribly, horribly wrong they were. Naive, Reflecting years later, Asriel would see the signs he missed. How they both underestimated her, how they thought Noelle would be naive and sweet forever, how picking a concept as strong as they did with so little preparation was a death sentence.

When they crawled from the basement, their bodies were sore and battered with wounds that were not there. They understood their mistake, the gravity of their oversight. They healed what they could with hot baths and vitamins, barely recovered until they had to face the consequences. Re-entering. they were encircling Kris like hawks to protect them from what had seen. Sealing off the fountain without leaving so much as a scratch on the Lord of Screens. How can you cut what you cannot catch?

Worse, still, was the revelation that chased the short lived relief. The horror, the cold realization that the fountain had been sealed, yet it had already breeched the basement and spread, their so-called Lord of the Screens slithering out alongside it. It had crawled out like slime mold through the underbelly of Home Town, the unfeeling, craving darkness taking refuge and multiplying in the first empty space it found.

The bunker. It was still in the bunker, waiting with a patient smile on its face.

--

Susie had her jaw clenched, hands in her pocket, rubbing up and down the handle of her brush. She listened with dwindling patience as Asriel summarized the wicked string of misfortunes in an increasingly stuttering, halting manner. She recognized that, like Ralsei, he was downplaying the grim nature of it. But even then, what he was telling her was enough to make her taste bile at the back of her tongue.
"Y'know, I think I get you now. I always wondered, y'know? Hearing about you. I would ask myself, what's the catch? Nobody's perfect, and you're no different. But geez. I didn't think the catch would be that you're... what, trying to make up for trying to sacrifice your own sibling?"

Asriel recoiled at the accusation, "No! No, Angel above, Susie, that's not what I-"

She cut him off, "No, I think I get it. I do. You were taking a little kid into a dark world. That's messed up, dude, even if it stops there." She shook her head, "But you.. you really..."
She almost couldn't say it. She couldn't get the image out of her head. Kris, small and scared. The two people they loved and trusted the most with their hands wrist deep in their ribcage, pulling free their SOUL to use in battle. An object. It was heinous. It revolted her. She nearly lost her composure just picturing their face. Their red eyes and reaching hands.
She spit on the grass, "Fuck you, Asriel."

He drew in a shaking breath, nodding. "I deserve worse than that. I was.. I-I was so short sighted. I was so sure that.. That I allowed myself to think about everything as a means to an end... I treated the darkners like they were only objects, and... I stopped being able to tell the difference between dark and light, everything and everyone became a tool to use. I was only thinking in the absolute. I justified myself. I justified Dess. I'll never, ever, ever forgive myself." He looked at her again, and she saw the same primal resolve burning in his core, "I beg forgiveness every day, every day. It'll never wipe away, that horrible sin. I'd take on what I did to Kris a thousand times over to undo it."

Asriel's eyes were red rimmed, "We both lost our lives that night as punishment." He traced his thumbnail along the links of the golden chain, "For our hubris- F-For thinking we could climb the prophecy to see eye-to eye with God. That we could be above lightners and darkners."

A chill raced along her spine hearing him talk. Looking at him now, weak and pathetic, standing alone under a single lamp. He was right, wasn't he? Being Delta Warriors killed Dess, and whatever was left of Asriel was hardly better. The Deltarune above his heart wasn't a declaration of belief but an albatross on his neck that he wore to remind himself.
"I gotta go." She said, "I-I gotta get you outta my sight before I do something I REALLY regret."

Chapter Text

Kris woke up too early. The summer sunrise sent cool white beams of light onto their skin and blankets. Kris wanted to throw a pillow over their head and go back to their dream, but they couldn't. It felt like bees were swarming in their chest. It was strange, this sense of urgency sloshing uneasily inside of them. It was distant, a third person reflection of anxiety. Through their early haze they remembered it was the SOUL's emotion bleeding onto them.

"Wha.." Kris cleared their throat, rubbing their eyes, "What's wrong?"

"I-I'm stuck!" It answered quickly, sleep coloring Kris' voice even deeper than the SOUL's usual gravelly timbre, "I can't- I can't leave."

"D'y.. Like, want to be put in the birdcage or something?" They mumbled, half-alert.

"No! No, I- I can't.. I can't see m-my.. My hands.. I c-can't see... I'm stuck. I'm stuck."

Now Kris sat up, mind starting to churn its words. Stuck? It was where it had been for the last week or so. Kris looked down at their hands. All ten fingers were where they should be, now in Gooped Out green. They still had their carnival admission band wrapped around their wrist and pulling out some of their arm hair.

" I, uh, don't get it." They offered, "And, again, you don't have hands.."

"You wou.. wouldn't get it." It made Kris crane their neck towards their ceiling, as if it was searching for something beyond their ability, "Can you hear.. Can you hear me?"

Kris was quiet, waiting for the answer with them. Was there some sort of Angel hierarchy they weren't aware of? There were many SOULS, some without bodies that would nestle within hollowed humans like ethereal hermit crabs, but none ever stayed this long, or made these kinds of statements. The only answer they received was the sound of Asriel sitting up, fur staticky and shaggy.

He answered quietly, eyes still shut, "Yeah, Bub, I hear you."

They held their breath. Be normal. Still the SOUL spoke, randomly grabbing an option with hardly a second to read, "Sleep talking, sorry." Thank god. That was another good save. Asriel accepted this, laying back without any protestation.

Kris waited another few minutes, listening cautiously, until Asriel's breathing deepened and steadied. Only then did Kris sneak from their bed down the stairs.

"Kris I'm. Stuck." It repeated, still pressing but with less terror in its voice (Kris' voice, despite how it was becoming easier to forget that fact), ".. So-something went.. wrong."

Kris pulled out the milk from the fridge and pulled straight from the carton, "Can you like, explain a little? You're in the same spot."

It growled, and Kris felt the low vibrations from their throat. Cool. They briefly wondered if they could make that sound themselves.

"I can't..." It had learned from the day before that Kris did not tolerate silence, so it begrudged an answer, "I.. exist outside here. And I.. am stuck."

Kris nodded. Like the Matrix, got it. "That sucks." They offered, not exactly trying to hide their insincerity, "What's that mean going forward?"

"Remember the.. the voice?"

Kris sobered, trying to remember. The first death in the middle of battling with Jevil, right after they were downed they heard it for the first time. It was during the fight against the Knight that Kris started to pay attention to the sound. Looking up at those black and white fractals consuming their vision, it seemed to hardly resemble a voice. More of a combination of sounds in a cadence. It spoke longer that time. And again, around the fifth or sixth death they heard it again. Warmer, cloying tones now in that same voice. It didn't sound like another language. It was like the sound of an old IBM sparking to life. It blipped and clicked and purred like a machine with emotion.

"Yeah, I remember. I told you though, I didn't understand it." Angels could speak in that language, huh? If Darkners and the Knight were able to manipulate electronics in the way that they did, it would only make sense that Angels would have the same ability to transmit information like modems would, through whistling and grinding analog tones.

The SOUL was thinking, Kris could almost feel its contemplation. "I understand now."

"H-How lucky we are

To need each... other

In this way."

This could not be called a betrayal upon further reflection. It had, after all, agreed to the conditions of the experiment. A grave misunderstanding of the terms, a misattribution of speaker and listener. The SOUL couldn't keep focused. Was its body in the higher plane now stuck, grayscale, staring at nothing? Was the game playing on? Beyond that- A more important question flashed hotly. Would their power still be able to shine? Would Kris still be able to walk backwards from death next time they were in the Dark World?

It wouldn't make sense for the Scientist's experiment if the independent variable was stripped away. So the odds were that this was an escalation of their connection alone. If this continued, would it continue to enmesh the SOUL and Kris? It couldn't be, the prophecy told them all that the Angel would be banished to meet with its desire. The vessel would be waiting. But, if that message was not referring to the Scientist and the Subject but instead the SOUL and CAGE, what else from the prophecy could be reinterpreted this way?

"Dude." The SOUL heard its vessel speak and became grounded to the situation.

Kris shivered, "Don't recite creepy ass poetry like that. What the hell. Ew."

The SOUL knew (or perhaps it only believed) that no mutual understanding could be reached. It heard Kris, with their unsteady grasp on reality and their memory already burned out and written over. Any explanation would only deepen that pit and deny them of their Realness. It did not risk this.

Asriel walked down the stairs, finger combing his moppy fur, "Mornin' Bub. You're up early." He said affectionately, swinging into the kitchen and digging through the cabinets for ingredients.

The SOUL didn't give Kris options, waiting patiently. It was following Kris' command. Be Normal. Even if their current view of reality had been smeared across planes of existence.

Already, he was cracking eggs into a pan, "Quiche? I'm gonna surprise mom."

Kris nodded, resting their head on their folded arms as they watched him.

"Where's Susie?"

He halted, whisk in hand, "Oh! Uh, she went home after the fireworks. I offered to let her stay over but she didn't take me up on that."

Kris narrowed their eyes. With the muddy flood of their dammed up memories, they were able to see Asriel more clearly. They went to implore but Asriel spoke again.

"Hey, Kris.. Y'know you can tell me anything, right?" He turned to face them, his face sincere and his glasses folded in his pocket, "If you're ever in trouble and need a way out. You can always come get me."

"Where's this coming from...?" Kris had questions. Dozens of questions. More than questions, they had confessions. I saw her, in our living room, in the chapel. She's not like you remember. She's different now, she's all wrong. She calls me, whispering at night. I have to help her or else, or else everything falls apart and I-

Asriel shrugged, chewing his bottom lip, "I just know you, is all! I know you're into trouble right now. I dunno what it is but.. If you need me to cover for you, or pick you up.." He saw Kris' scared expression, "or uh.. pay your bail..? Or.. uh.. Buy..... certain things...... you might... uh..." His face went red, flustered as he slowly went back to cooking. Kris felt their thoughts of the knight freeze as they picked up the implication.

"Susie's not my girlfriend." Kris responded quickly.

"Sure, bud."

"S-She's not!"

"I know I don't have a degree yet or anything I think I can reason out that's not true. Bub, you showed up yesterday holding hands. And I doubt that's mom's crusty hairbrush in the bathroom, too."

He glanced over playfully and saw Kris' blank, owl-like expression. "Oh wow, you didn't realize it either?" He laughed brightly, grateful for something to lighten the tension, "You've always had bad people skills, but who falls backwards into getting a girlfriend?"

"I get play, sorry old man." Kris responded deadpan. They did wonder about Susie. Where she was. What she said to Azzy to kick up all of those strange and personal promises. Before they even realized they felt that extra air enter their lungs, and the sensation from behind their ribs was gone. Whoops.

Chapter Text

Susie was alone. She had almost forgotten how she used to like being alone. It was familiar, it was predictable. It made it easy to react and survive. It was like a pair of worn out shoes. Now being alone was.. weird. Not lonely. But different. The self loathing she used to hide under during these moments was gone. Now it was a neutral feeling, like getting callouses on her fingers. Protected.

Being alone now had an upside. While she was hatefully stalking away from the Dreemurr house after her confrontation, she had to navigate through the crowds of people leaving the Festival. Being a hated figure made your presence fall into one of two sides, she had realized. You were either someone that other people were acutely aware of when there were less than three other people nearby, or if they were in a crowd, you were aggressively ignored to the point of invisibility. The positive of the situation was that it made listening into conversations laughably easy.

That's when she learned about it. Another escalation. Overheard from a group of older women, their voices almost as loud as their perfume. Then the pieces started to fall into place for her, and she knew she had to tell Ralsei.

He was, as always, waiting at the main gate when she arrived. Wiping eyelashes off of his rounded glasses, humming softly to himself. When the light caught his attention she could see his face change. That patient neutrality giving way to a jubilant happiness once he saw that she still had her braid in. He went to her, squeezing her in a tight hug that she waited a few seconds to shove away.

"Susie!"

"Yea, yeah, you miss me" She begrudged, shoving him off of her with a gentleness.

He looked nervous, wringing his hands, looking more relieved than excited to see her, "Um, so how was the Festival?"

She gave him a smile, flustered remembering it, "A secret admirer gave me a candy apple. Know anything about that?"

Ralsei gasped. That was NOT what he said to Kris. "A-a secret...?! Oh, no I don't.. um.."

He recoiled from a friendly punch to the arm, "You're some real tooth-rotting stuff, know that?" She asked teasingly, "Now I gotta plan. I can't let you be the only one giving gifts around here." Her sharky smile widened as she realized what was on her wrist, "Hey, check it out, I got you something too!"

A heavy, acid green bracelet that glimmered holographic at the right angles, adhered with a gummy loop. She shimmied it off of her wrist and joined it around his, having to tighten it as much as it allowed to hit around his more delicate paw. "Ta-da!"

Ralsei looked at the bracelet. Inspected the shine. Read the word "Admission" that was printed across it in foil letters. Behind his thick glasses, his eyes were misty. He tried to hide a sniffle. Looking at it on his wrist... it felt like he was able to say he was there with her, too. She thought about him. Their friendship.. was more real than he was. No, there was that thought again. Their friendship was real. It persisted into the Light World in a way that he couldn't.

"Susie...!! Thank you..."

"What the hell are you crying for?! Is it that bad? I'll give you the spiky one if you're gonna-"

Ralsei hugged her again, this time with a conviction that she didn't expect, his wet nose pressing into her collar as he stood on his tiptoes, "I.. I love it!!"

Cautiously, as though she would scare him off, she hugged him back. Only for a second, then she pushed him away from her, "Hey. Don't mention it. It's a thanks for uh.. Y'know. Braiding my hair.. and everything else." She rubbed the back of her neck, "Hey. Uh.. Can we talk, actually?"

They went into the castle, and Susie nervously sat on her bed. She was avoiding looking at Ralsei as she spoke, "So like, I found some stuff out."

His smile strained, and she was reminded of Asriel's tense pseudo-pleasant demeanor. Kris wasn't totally right, they had a lot of similarities, "Also, kinda related, Kris uh.. They're not doing too hot right now."

"Why..? Kris isn't sick, are they?"

"No, no, uh. Not like that, like.." She exhaled hard. Why was this so hard to talk about? Ralsei was her friend. But, Kris was being secretive about how much they were struggling, the same thing Ralsei had been guilty of in the church. She recognized that she was only struggling because unlike the other two members of the Fun Gang, she was willing to be upfront and honest. Even if it hurt. And it was starting to get a little painful.

"Look, uh.. What do you know about.. um, people trying to fulfil the prophecy before us?"

Ralsei was standing patiently on her rug, a paw on the violet windowsill. He looked just as lost as her, "I.. I don't think I follow. I mean.. Everybody is following the prophecy. But... if you mean that there were... other Delta Warriors before us? Surely not."

The steely look she pierced into him made him wince, "I'm being genuine, Susie. I promise."

She sighed, "Right, sorry. You'd get why I'd be on guard." The betrayal was still hot on her skin, even if she had moved past it, that rupture of her already frail trust was lingering. She refused to stay bitter. She spent most of her life bitter. So she kept moving on, "Seam, the cat stitch guy that runs the shop? Yeah, apparently he was one of the 'first' Delta warriors."

Now Ralsei's confused look was shifted, looking equally wounded and scared, "What..? That... That can't be. Seam isn't even..."

"I know." She answered quietly, "Kris' brother was uh... He was one of them too..."

Ralsei shook his head, "But that doesn't-"

"And.. The girl they had with them? She uh.. died. Noelle's sister got... got murdered... in a Dark World..."

The silence spreading through the room shivered and spun as they both reflected on what that meant. On what must have happened. On how that could happen again.

Susie swallowed the lump in her throat and kept speaking, "I think... I think both of them really really hurt Kris during that last Dark World."

"The Angel..." Ralsei began, tentative and almost overly cautious, "The Angel is taking the place of their SOUL.. I admit.. I didn't know, but.. I had my suspicions that something had; to have happened for Kris to be able to contain two SOULs in their body. A human can't absorb another human's SOUL."

"That girl, she.. Stole it from them. To use it like a weapon or something..."

Ralsei frowned, his face knit in a pained expression. Both of them were tortured by the image, of their stoic leader being so intimately betrayed. Susie turned her head away, shaggy hair covering her face, "I think they forgot it all... And.. And now they're starting to remember what happened. I think all the stuff we're doing is making them like.. Relive it, or something. 'Cause.. When I went over there I saw them like.."

She knew she wasn't supposed to tell Ralsei any of this, but she felt crushed under the weight of what she was learning, "Hey. Keep this a secret, okay? I'm just... Telling you 'cause you're my friend. But I saw them.... crying. They..." She couldn't make herself talk about the bite marks or hearing them smash their head against the drywall, "They're not the kind of person that cries. Ever."

Right. The biggest secret. She didn't know how to say it, and she knew she SHOULDN'T say it. "Ralsei. Can you keep a secret? Seriously."

He took in a shaky breath, reading the determined look on her face. He nodded bravely. He learned the hard way that friendship wasn't just about happiness. There were moments of pain and conflict. This felt like a testament of that rule, because he felt his brain screaming at him to say no. Of all people to hide things from, Kris? The leader? But he wanted to be a real friend to Susie, and that strengthened his resolve.

"Kris.. Kris and the Angel... Uh." Ralsei stared behind her with a fearful intensity that made her immediately look behind her shoulder. Nothing but the wall. "They're.. Talking to each other."

What Susie said before was going to be scary to Ralsei, sure. But now, the expression that flashed onto his face scared her twice as much. His pupils were pin holed, face holding no smile or even frown. Just a blank, wide-eyed stare, fur standing on end like a startled cat.

"Uh, Y-you're freaking me out.." Susie said, leaning away.

Ralsei approached her slowly, putting his finger in front of his lips.

She looked behind her again. Nothing. There was no way it was here, right? Besides, even if it was... It couldn't do anything, could it? "Ralsei...?"

"Susie." His eyes flicked behind her again.

She wheeled onto her feet, turning and punching her fist into the wall, leaving four dents when she retracted her knuckles. If it was there, omnipotent and always listening, she was gonna give it a show.

"Hey, Angel! If you're listening!" She said suddenly, speaking to the air. She shook her hand off, feeling Ralsei futilely pulling her arm away, her chains jingling in protest, "Uh..." She smirked, remembering when she whispered to it, the first time she actually felt herself put some trust in it. It had paid off, hadn't it? "Thanks for being cool.. About.. Like, about letting Kris go to the Festival..." She cleared her throat, rubbing her sore knuckles, "Uh. And uh.. Sorry I kissed you."

Ralsei froze from where he was trying to pull her away, face twitching.

She smirked at his reaction, "I should uh... Probably explain, huh?"

He stared at her, then at where she had dented the wall, then back at her. Then he nodded feverishly.

"Wait, it's not super important right now. I think I figured out why they took Officer Undyne."

Chapter Text

"A... A recipe?" Ralsei repeated, eyebrows furrowed tight together.

As she explained, shaking her fist out, he watched a certain seriousness overtake her that nearly felt out of character. Ralsei was bristled by her sudden shift in tone. Her usual determination was still present, sure, but the calm way she spoke? The stillness of her body as she confided in him? He recognized she had grown tremendously since he first met her, and he recognized more that she was scared. He was scared too, and he was almost brave enough to admit it.

"I heard these church ladies talking, after the Festival. They... They said that the priest he- he never showed up to midnight mass. That the church was all torn up, like someone had went in there and started a fight..." She rubbed the back of her neck, her untied braid starting to unfurl into spiral curls.

"I don't think the symbols go to the bunker codes...What if those three symbols aren't about who owns a code, but who you need for...." She swallowed hard, catching the upturned look on Ralsei, and spoke quietly, "It's a sacrifice. It was always a recipe for a sacrifice."

The implication of what she said hit Ralsei hard. He had some suspicion, that the Knight wasn't only working for the Roaring. They would have done that a thousand times in the sanctuary by the time they made it up to fight them.

A cool breeze ruffled through the window, pushing against both of them as they thought about it together.

"The Knight.." Ralsei began.

Susie cut him off, "What do you know? About the Knight, I mean?"

He caught her implication and flinched reflectively. She looked flustered in return, and he found some levity in knowing that she didn't mean to dig at him like that. "I... The knight only shows up in one or two panels of the prophecy. Just that we fight them, they use a blackened knife.. and that they're at the End of the prophecy."

She stood up, cracking her back, "I wanna go out." She said, gesturing crudely for him to follow, "Let's stock back up, fix our inventory a little.. I don't think we have a lotta time to prepare before the next fountain opens up." It had all gotten devastatingly real with Tenna, and even though she felt it throughout the sanctuaries... Talking to Asriel, looking at her warped reflection in December's Deltarune necklace, realizing that this prophecy already had a body count? It struck her cold in her boots. This place didn't feel like an escape anymore. It just felt like another place.

Maybe that was a good thing?

"We- W-wait, Susie... We should wait for Kris." Ralsei suggested sensitively, hands drawn close to his chest.

He listened to her release a long, frustrated sigh, her hand clutching the frame of the door. "Ralsei.. I get that Kris is our leader, I do. But.. Just 'cause I'm not smart doesn't mean I.. I need a babysitter to do stuff for me."

He shuffled towards her, paled with his hand on his chest, "Oh! Susie- That's! That's not what I meant, not at all... I just know that.. um, we should wait for all three of us to..."

Susie's eyebrows were pitched up, looking skeptically at him with her hands in her pocket, "I'm gonna fork over half our cash to the Addisons if you don't come with me."

"Okay! Okay, I surrender."

--

Hustling through the streets with Ralsei close behind, she passed the recruits. A new choir, Shuttah laughing with a Swatch. She waved to Lancer as he was assembling his instrument, and he stuck his tongue out as a reply. It was such a contrast. Everyone was waving, tossing a friendly word, smiling at her. Was this how other people got to feel, all the time?

She dipped her head to fit through the doorway of Seam's shop, Ralsei following behind like a shadow. Inside was dark, and the smell of cigar smoke and herbal tea that swished between the insulating layers of cloth walls made it feel like a world away from Castletown. Seam was, as ever, behind the counter, their moppish body swaying as they dusted the shelves with an old rag. Their ears twitched as they heard Susie's footsteps against their rug carpet, and they hummed and turned.

"Well, I would be lying if I said I wasn't waiting on you." Seam moved slowly, the long fabric smock on their body swaying like heavy curtains. Leaning their upper body on the counter, they shook their head, "When I saw the new recruits, my... You three... Heheh! Each time you face a certainty, you spin it on its head. I haven't been so amused in all my days." They pointed a yellow claw at the gap of space that Susie and Ralsei unconsciously placed between each other, "And where is your other?"

Susie suddenly felt shy, like her bravery was starting to go cold. Maybe they should have waited for Kris. No, she reasoned, Kris was already so affected by whatever had happened with Asriel and December, what would this do other than rip open old wounds? She had to take the lead here, she could be the one to share the information with Kris without forcing them into situations like this.

"They're hanging out with their brother today." She decided that honesty was the only way forward, "So it's just us."

Seam allowed the air to stagnate as they looked at her and smiled, studying the unnatural stiffness of their bodies and the aloof expressions they were pointing at the countertop. Finally, with a long hum, "I suppose you came here for a reason, then? Not often to see The little Prince move without purpose, after all."

Ralsei's face reddened. That was true, wasn't it? He had spent his time in the past waiting at the entrance for his two friends, his Real friends to return, singularly focused on being the first thing they saw. Only the last few days was he allowing himself to move about Castle Town, allowing himself to make Darkner friends.

"Yeah, actually... Uh... Hey, so..." Susie was losing her nerve. She didn't know if she had the stomach to talk about it. She was hard to rattle, but the look that Asriel gave her in the kitchen, with his amber eyes stabbing a desperate, feral sense of urgency into her, watching him lose his composure... That look was still under her eyelids, hiding in the corners. It wore down some of her fearlessness. She would rather wear a pink silk bow than be faced with that again.

"Uh, Look, this is probably something you don't wanna talk about, but..." Susie meandered around the point, gritting her teeth, "Uh... Y'know..." She shot Ralsei a pleading look. It took him much longer than it would have taken Kris to understand what she was trying to say, but Ralsei finally returned a sympathetic smile and cleared his throat.

"Susie heard something in the Light World... That you may have been a hero of the prophecy in the past..."

Seam's eye widened, and they looked struck by the absurdity of the statement, "Hehehe... Ha ha ha! What an awful rumor to confront me with!" They leaned over the counter, Cheshire smile an answer all on its own, "I was never a hero. None of us were."

"Then what.. were you?" Susie countered, meeting their empty eye.

"..." Seam answered with a tightly laced smile, and turned around again, making their way to a kettle suspended above a magic flame, "I was a toy." They answered simply, "Just as I am now. Made for a purpose and used up." They pulled out mismatched mugs and handed the kettle to Ralsei to pour.

"Am I, too, embittered? Perhaps, or perhaps not.." They continued as Ralsei fell into the rhythm, pouring the tea without protest. Susie watched with a growing confusion as an earthenware mug was filled with a dark, spicy smelling liquid and set in front of her.

Still, Seam continued to speak, stirring their own cup, cracked and mended much like themselves, with a pinky finger. Susie knew that there would be a break if she interrupted, so she listened intently. "I was given the role of The Lonely Prince. Yes, yes I was." Their smile was always sad, but now it was more sadness than smile, "I was never a prince. I was only ever a doll. You can have a great influence on a person's life, y'see, but you can't choose it for them. No matter how much you believe you have the right to. Or think you can. Or want to. Even when that person is a lowly darkner."

Susie smelled the tea, watched the flakes of tea leaves shimmer in the dark water. Ralsei sipped from it and grimaced, clearing his throat to hide it. She decided that was a great cue to sip from it, and the tea rose up to meet her lips. It was spicy, ginger root burning low at the back of her throat and between her teeth, but sweet like honey, both competing for her attention between cinnamon and apple-like cardamom. It felt good. Warm. The trace of apple that she didn't get from Kris' hair or their shampoo, the purring heat. She felt comforted. She wished she could have shared the recipe with the Old Man. He would have liked it too.

Wait. The Old Man. He was given a Shadow Crystal by the Knight themself, but he rejected his 'purpose' too. She took another sip, shifting the loose leaf between her tongue and felt braver than she did before. She wished she had the Crystal, but the Justice Axe hilted across her back felt like a reassuring hand.

"What happened, if I may..?" Ralsei asked, coughing delicately into his sleeve as he dared another sip. No. Too spicy.

Seam shook their finger off before they took a long drink of tea, seeming to spin the silence like thread on a loom. They sat the empty cup back down onto the counter, and after another painful moment they spoke again, their voice rustier and slower than before.

"Well, the prophecy, no matter how it gets interpreted..." They began, their voice like churning butter, gravelly yet tender, "You need a prince. A lighted monster. A lighted human. Heh, they hardly had the right parts. I think it was me, what doomed them from the start...." Seam gazed up at the hanging lantern, the metal cut out with stars and swirls, "But a Lightner is a God to a Darkner. They create us, protect us, they can exist in spaces we can't even fathom. How could a toy correct them? What can a toy say to change the mind of a God?"

"They weren't bad kids. None of 'em were. But, we met our ends. Came undone. And that was that."

"Pretty vague." Susie suggested, taking it upon herself to pour another cup. After a hesitation, she poured into Seam's empty mug. They gave her a grateful, surprised expression.

"The story is sad. Nobody wants to tell a sad story." Seam replied simply, taking their cup in their paws. Their stitching was loose, and white poofs of fiberfill peeked around their knuckles and wrists. "The Lightners... They thought they were following the pattern. But, there's some things we can't expect. I think it was the Lord of The Screens. That was the last battle." Seam was becoming distinctly uncomfortable the longer they spoke, fidgeting, turning the handle of their mug, "What a villain I was. A coward... I played my role without a sniff at what them kids told me to do. But the Lord wasn't what we thought, it was something different. Something it was futile to try to touch. Those hopeless days, that poor girl. So close, so close! The Lord of The Screen was right outside her grasp, and its pale imitation was... My, something more wicked and hopeless than three children could face."

"A titan?" Ralsei asked, wide eyed. He was enrapt in the story, the parallel white hot and unfathomable.

Seam let out a huff, "Titan? Whoever knows. A demon? A God? A concept? Don't think it matters, really. Just that it was a thing of a real darkness. Under this ground is the Depths. A darkner is a thing, but whatever crawls its god forsaken self from the Depths? What could we call it that could mean anything when you're face to face with it? Call it a Titan or a Friend, it'll rend you down all the same. That poor little thing. That poor child."

"Kris never-" Susie managed, shaking her head.

"Kris!" Seam repeated with a sudden heat in their voice, looking up at her, "Yes, yes. That was the name, wasn't it? It couldn't be... No, no. Kris. That's your leader, ain't it? With their brother. Who is the brother?"

"A-Asriel??"

"HA!" Seam spit stuffing behind them, rising to their feet and pacing. Their slow movements were faster but lacking in smoothness, staggering like a drunk back and forth and back again, muttering and laughing with a strange, jovial expression. "That's that poor child now, eh? That's the little Cage? Hah! Why, I never believed in ghosts before!"

Ralsei had his paw pressed on the counter, the display leaving his ribs feeling tight, "Wh-What do you mean by that?"

The pacing slowed to a stop, Seam's long fluttering robes swaying with the momentum. Their smiling face changed to a distant, ever distant stare, "Why, they ripped that poor thing's heart out. They did, while I watched. She took it up, and I stitched it into her like a quilt. Used that little one. Used them right up."

Kris, the little red devil. They only appeared at the end of the 'adventures' as The Girl called them. They were excitable, fast as an arrow and less than half as accurate. With their red horns and long red hair, they looked like a fireball as they bounded towards the Fountain. Utterly fearless and always in motion, neither weapon or a speck of armor on them, they were able to seal the fountain with hopes and dreams alone it seemed. Seam never spoke to them in the Dark World, as it was not their purpose, but Seam always found a fondness to them. While it was The Girl who made them, it was the Cage who brought them to life with their little antlered friend. What fun it was, back in those golden days of youth. Before the End came and the endless aftermath followed it. Of course, seeing the tactician now, with their cold blue colors, shielded and armored and barely awake with a steady gait that never changed... It was exactly what seeing a ghost would look like.

Susie slammed her hand onto the counter jaw clenched tight. While it startled Ralsei into sending a wave of hot tea across his hands, Seam only gave an understanding nod to her reaction, "I know." They answered, deep voice cutting through the still air, "When you're at the End, you'll make some desperate choices. Your judgment, whatever it may be, isn't wrong, but." He returned to the counter, the momentary madness over, "They weren't bad kids... They were just kids... Kids against the End of the World. So futile in the end, what loss it was. Kris, how could I have missed it? Those red, red eyes, yes... That's what I missed."

She couldn't feel her hands, she couldn't believe her ears. How, how could Seam stand by while that happened? Worse than stand by, they aided her and Asriel. To think Kris allowed this ragged thing into Castle Town despite how complicit they were in..... She was still poised to strike, but the lump in her throat stopped her from lashing out. Nothing could have been worse than her starting to shout but breaking down into tears. She tempered her rage into a single gritty word she spit at them. "Why?"

Her question and malice were met with a perfect understanding and acceptance. Seam again nodded, "A lighted monster, when they absorb a lighted human's SOUL... They become a great and terrible force, so immensely powerful. More powerful than the sum of their parts.

"They thought it thus, and I was just a toy. I did as I was told back then. When you watch a God sacrifice another to slay a demon, who are you to object? Even if you had the courage to...
Of course, now.. Now, as an auld darkner, I would behave much, much different. But the world was a game and we were suddenly looking death in its eyes and nails.

"When the child kept looking, kept moving, I knew something had not gone right. Or perhaps it had gone exactly as it should have, if you believe in Fate? She paid for her actions. That... Thing, that great terrible 'it'. But she wasn't allowed a death so peaceful, no. She was taken by it, by the dark. Somewhere in the Depths, that poor girl... I hope she's gone completely mad. I hope she's so mad she doesn't know what's happening anymore." They didn't speak anymore, darkened eyes staring down at nothing, hands loose at the countertop. "Oh, futility."

Explaining this to the Delta Warriors felt like Seam was finally paying penance. While imprisoning the world away from Jevil felt like a punishment, only now did it feel like they had atoned in some small way.

Susie wiped under her eyes, listening until she couldn't stomach it anymore and turned away.

"Thank you for... for telling us, Seam.. I'm... I'm sure this was hard." Ralsei offered, now standing side by side with Susie.

Ralsei suddenly became quiet, head swiveling towards some nebulous point in the distance.

"A Fountain just opened." Ralsei's head dipped down, "And- Kris is there."

Chapter Text

She was running to keep up with Ralsei, who was nearly floating through Castle Town, huffing as she grabbed the flapping hem of his sleeve for leverage.

The Great Door was open, and both of them passed under it. What was past it didn't resemble Lancer's kingdom at all, even though that was where it should have been. It was instead something that she struggled to wrap her mind around.

Shapes. Colors. Geometry that was twisted up and stretched out like party ribbons. A hall of mirror that didn't reflect either of them. Houses like building blocks growing on trees. Cathedral bell towers curled like fingers around the stretched blue path. She was running upside down, backwards.

She stumbled, falling and skidding forward on her knees. Ralsei stopped and turned, "Oh! Susie, I'm sorry, I was too fast." He offered an outstretched paw to her.

"Where are we?" She struggled to her feet, dusting blue powder off of her jeans and knees. They were nestled between windows attached to nothing, floating in front of blocks of colors,

"This is the dark, Susie. Only darkness generated by a fountain takes a sensical shape, so shadows in the light world live here like this!" Ralsei pushed away the inside of a fridge from the path with the tips of his fingers. Weightlessly it floated away without losing momentum, "Since it's the day time, it's hard to find places that are truly dark... That makes everything look a little..." He gazed around. He hadn't given the unformed darkness much thought. All things considering, it could be unsettling. Only the parts of buildings not sunlit standing two dimensionally and warped into the distance. Objects cresting darker sentience. Like they were in the space before human consciousness. Ralsei found it beautiful, just as that thought reached him. The place Before. The Beginning.

"Uh, Ralsei..?" Susie pointed to a deep red shape floating through the abyss, breaking him from her enlightenment," Hey, woah! Look, I think this is my apartment!"

She pointed at cube of brick red, where shapes were imprinted upon crookedly it like stamps in art class. The sketchy outline of Godzilla in low contrast like a children's drawing. A white rectangle, skewed along the Z axis, what she imagined her sheetless bed looked like, a zig zag meandering across the bottom that was close enough to the pattern of the blanket she tossed over her window as a curtain.

Ralsei studied it with a hint of concern across his face but Susie smiled, "Yeah, makes sense you'd see it, 'cause I never have the light on in the place. They, like, flicker. But really fast, y'know? So you get this afterimage like you're all slow motion. So I just use the street lamp out my window when the sun goes down."

She turned and noticed Ralsei's face as he looked at the shape, lips pursed in quiet focus, "Geez, C'mon, don't look at it like that. It's cool, I got a working AC unit and everything. Kinda the ritz when you think about it." She joked lightly, patting his arm.

"So this place is an inverse of your Home town?"

She looked around again with the same though process as him. The graffiti manifested as prion-esque 3d curls. Rectangles cubes roughly the same color as the dumpster stuck out of an orange tree growing from nothing towards nowhere.

"Yeah, I guess it is..." She said, gears in her mind started working.

If they could reach a dark fountain this way.. and it mirrored the layout of the town... It was entirely possible, then, that the three of them could walk into the bunker. No, walk backwards under the bunker. No need for codes or espionage. It felt all too obvious now. She felt electric, she had to tell Kris. She did it.

"C'mon, we gotta get Kris!" She said eagerly, running ahead of (behind? under?) Ralsei towards nothing and nowhere.

Ralsei laughed, bounding in front of her to lead the way until they were very suddenly in a different place and time.

Around them stretched a lush and rich garden. The shapes and colors under their feet turned to downy grass and shelly cobblestones that showed a path that loop-de-looped around large urns of Gerber daisies, blooming roses in sunshine yellows, pale pink resurrection flowers. A flower of every color and texture, trees and vines and leaves were surrounding them with massive hedges. No matter where they looked their eyes adjusted to the smatter of colors from the soft and dainty to the electric and carnivorous . Susie looked around leisurely, impressed at the sight. She bent down to pluck a chrysanthemum that was growing between her black boots. Like a bouquet they were dropped into.

"What a beautiful place." Ralsei sighed, tenderly running his hands across the carnations' petals, hearing them giggle and shiver in response and drawing his hands back, "Oops, I shouldn't touch them!"

The pink carnations spoke up, a choir of little voices, "... Be honest... You can either choose to die along side, or live with the consequences..."

Susie and Ralsei were leaned in now, "What the hell?" She asked, "What does THAT mean?"

The flowers didn't respond, swaying tenderly in the breeze, spreading their sweet smell. Ralsei touched a petal and it shivered in response.

"What the... Does that mean...?" They repeated, voices small and spacey.

She poked at the chrysanthemum between her claws and it only lost a white petal in response. "...Weird." She said, "Freaky. "

Ralsei hesitated, but then walked in front of her and looked at the other flowers, cautiously studying them. They didn't have flowers like this at Castle Town.

The thought of death and consequences dragged her mind back to Seam's shop. "Hey... Uh, not to change the subject, but can someone-like a human I mean- even live without a SOUL?" She asked quietly, yellow eyes glancing over to Ralsei as he held his ears back to lean forward and smell a yellow rose.

The question made him stand up straight, eyebrows furrowed, "I.. I'm not sure. The SOUL is a culmination of.. everything about a person. Their hopes and dreams, their compassion, their will to live... If Kris lost their SOUL.. I'm not... It wouldn't make sense for Kris to remain.." He frowned, rosy eyes turning stormy, "What we learned today.. It.." He grinded his teeth, looking angry in a way that Susie hadn't seen from him before, "It's awful.. It makes me feel sick if I think about it... Kris stayed kind, even after all of that. Even when their kindness was taken away." He gently rubbed a rose petal between his fingers, feeling the velvety and powder like texture, "Maybe the Angel replaced their SOUL when that happened, and waited for the right time."

The rose answered, a repetition of what passed through its air, "No, no no no no no no this isn't happening. Not you. Not you." It cheerfully answered.

The tense conversation turned to shards as they stared at the rose. Ralsei touched it again and it repeated the same thing. Susie experimented, but it did the same to her. The rose bush offered nothing more. She walked forward, tapping the chrysanthemum bush as though she was activating a switch. Large, furling white flowers spoke in a rich chorus, "Kris?" it asked, and after a pregnant pause it again repeated their name. A call unanswered.

"Something's... looking for them?" She asked, anxiously turning towards Ralsei. Ralsei nodded grimly, and both of them were in harmony with what to do next.

Briskly travelling down the cobblestone path, the stones began to ring out in rich harmonies, one note per step and stone. Once they reached an equalized pace, two steps apart, the tones harmonized until it sounded akin to a lullaby, empty bell tones that were swallowed up by the leaves around them. Susie didn't mind the music, instead her focus stayed on touching all of the flowers she passed, listening to what they had overheard.

The white daisies, "You know what that thing is..?"

The pansies spreading between the stones, "Son, I never gave up... These last three years I never stopped the investigation..."

The lotus bulb, floating in a mossy pool, "... Why... do you have that... Where did you find that...?"

The white lilies, "...It's useless... novelty... It's just glass, dad..."

The red carnations, "...What do you remember....?"

The honey yellow daffodils, turned towards the false sun, "The promise... It's not worth this..."

The Forget-me-nots laughed.

The bleeding hearts from their basket, " No! Not anymore, are..."

The Sunflower, gone to seed, "Move on? Do you think after what..."

The path ended into a round grove of trees heavy with fruit. Their branches intertwined and drooping to offer fruit like the Giving Tree's extended family. Susie and Ralsei both had to duck and lift branches to make their way through, the intended archway collapsed with new growth. Despite the pressing nature of the moment, Susie made sure to stuff jer pockets with whatever the spiky berries and yellow apples were even if she had to jostle the contents to make them fit. She reasoned that it was never a bad idea to top off supplies, even though before they left Seam had been generous with filling their storage.

In the clearing, surrounded by trees with weighed down branches, Kris was kneeling in the center, under the yellow apple tree. Tracing an ungloved hand along their forearm, as if to comfort themselves. Tilting their head towards fluttering petals, blinking their eyes.

"Kris!" Ralsei exclaimed arms outstretching, racing forward to see them.

But Susie grabbed and pulled him back by the scarf.

"That," She said grimly, fury hot behind her words, "That is NOT Kris."

Chapter Text

She couldn't justify her declaration.

But something was just.. Off. Off in the primal way that she couldn't put her finger on but her whole body rose to acknowledge.

The way they held their face, maybe, with their eyelids stretched just a little too open, changing the shape of their eye to something more round and disarming. Or, it could have been the way their resting expression was a small, spacey almost smile that looked so foreign on Kris. Or maybe it was their body. The proper and rigid way the held their back and legs, they were sitting as if they were at an altar.
They were brushing a bare hand up and down their arm in a strange display of sincerity to no one with their empty gauntlet placed perfectly parallel in front of them. When Kris swiveled their head and saw them, her suspicion was all but confirmed. It was like a carnival animatronic, or like looking into a mirror in the dark. Almost right but one degree off.

"Kris" stood, braced against the smooth bark of the tree. Then paused, eyes shifting side to side. Then, finally, began shakily shambling towards them, their legs shivering and threatening to buckle like a newborn doe. Each step was paced slowly, paired with a small exhale of effort. They looked up, eyes fixating on Ralsei, then locking onto Susie.

"Who.. Who the hell *are* you?" She wasted no time asking, stepping forward in front of Ralsei and seizing it by the cape. 'Kris' looked up at her, red eyes surrounded by white sclera in an uncanny studying of her face. She didn't know what else to do but allow whatever was wearing Kris to look at her.

Its mouth formed a tight, frustrated line as the words only manifested as weak hisses. Its hand pawed over its heart, and it stared expectantly at her with knit eyebrows.

"The... Ugh, you?" She responded with a sneer. Her grip on its cape loosened and she released it back onto its feet with a wobble.

It nodded, grateful to be understood.

Ralsei bounced between staring at Susie and "Kris" as he thought about what was happening. When it clicked, it clicked with a loud gasp and his paws clasped over his mouth. The Angel. The Player. The SOUL! Manifest fully before him?!

This moment, where Ralsei and The Angel were finally meeting! He had daydreamed it between the wet lines of ink in the manual, when he was truly alone at the mouth of the Fountain. It was so close to those day dreams. The Angel stood, blushing apple blooms swirled around both of them with the soft breeze, turning its eyes to him. It looked fawn-like, wide eyes peeking under space blue hair. Fitting, for something he couldn't begin to understand. Yet, that blissful moment he envisioned was achingly hollow. All Ralsei could think about was Kris. Even when he tried to ground himself, he couldn't help but want to shout the question out. Where are they? He was supposed to be bowing, thanking The Player for allowing him to meet these two wonderful people, saying that he was grateful for guiding him to this exact moment. But even now, with The Player, the Red SOUL itself, looking at Ralsei with wide cinder eyes, no words were forming on his lips. The Player, the Angel, the bringer of The End standing in the flesh (or.. In Kris' flesh..); This being who lived in a plane of existence and understanding two levels above him. He had nothing to say to them aside from inquiring about Kris. The story Seam had told him was still branded on the forefront of his mind. The 'little red devil', failed by everyone who ever touched their life. Looking at The Player, it seemed as though even the rest of Kris' body was rendered out by the prophecy.

The question was already being asked by Susie, who was still incensed, her freckled knuckles blanching from how tightly she was gripping her axe, "Then where..." Susie took a deep breath, tilting her head up, "Then where the fuck is Kris." The raw edge in her voice was a saw tooth against the SOUL. She couldn't grab it and shake it senseless, even though she really wanted to. It was still Kris' body. The body she healed and stood by (and maybe once or twice kissed). It was too perverse, even if it was merely a copy.

The SOUL stumbled back, bare hand of Kris tangling in the branches, "H-here." It managed, pressing a hand again to Kris' chest plate. It was the first time either of them were aware of how the SOUL spoke through Kris' body, specifically what it was like when it spoke without Kris' attenuation of the strange quality of their voice. It was too deep, rolling. The timbre of the monster under the bed with an odd, almost song-like quality. All features too uncanny and unnatural for the body of a fifteen year old.

She bared her teeth at it, stepping forward. Her scales were raised, transspecies goosebumps giving her the appearance of a violet pangolin. The brevity of the statement maddened her, how could it dismiss stealing Kris' body with a single word, "I don't believe you! You..."

It staggered back and shook Kris' head, "Don't...! Don't.. S...Sc... Scare them." It scolded firmly, holding a warning finger out to her. It was staring into her yellow eyes with a seriousness that didn't back down at the sight of her fangs. The expression was even different from one Kris would make, more self assured and fiery, "Shh.." They were standing stable now, still holding the branches with their bare hand.

She exhaled through her nose, holding its glare. What the hell did that mean, anyways? She hated how often it made her ask that question. Still, why would Kris be scared? Scared enough to yield control completely? She thought about the night before, when they refused to investigate the bunker, and her stomach curdled.

Susie caught Ralsei's stooping deference to it and scowled, "Ralsei. Kris can't stand this thing. They told me to always keep my guard up around it, don't try to let it lead you around."

The SOUL's head tilted down as if it wanted badly to interject. But no other words were coming. There was still a frenetic instability to the relationship between CAGE and Parts. But there was, to the SOUL, a breakthrough. An agreement to stop asking and to stop hiding in return. Their CAGE... Kris, this kid that they were involuntarily shackled to, now that it was stuck within.. It held Kris' arm again as it contemplated how to answer.

"So Kris is... Still in there... Okay?" Ralsei clarified as he bounced on his heels, barely listening to the actual substance of what it was saying.

The moony-eyed frown it answered with seemed to leech the color from the flowers and fruit around it. Even though it was struck mute for the moment, it could feel the body beginning to calibrate to its presence and control, its breath deepening. Sensation was returning, it had been days since the SOUL received first hand input from fingertips and bare skin. Kris' palm hurt. They had chainmail under their plates, the loops cool against someone else's skin. The flowers smelled nice, lily flowers lent the air a creamy smell that reminded it of something just out of grasp. They were a little far sighted, but not enough for glasses. The SOUL tried to avoid noticing another detail, shaking its head.

It hummed and nodded, seeming to realize it hadn't actually answered. "Sorry, Int... Interfacing.. Wait." It explained, rich tonal voice gentle. The SOUL coughed. It thought it had been learning how to speak without Kris' help, but having Kris' absent consciousness forced it to recognize how much help they were giving it, even when they didn't want to. How much the SOUL had taken without realizing... How complicated moving a human body actually was without the "game" simplifying. Even standing balanced before them was a careful application of three hundred muscles working in tandem. Muscles it had never used before in a smaller frame, its Real body (wherever it may be and in whatever state) having gone unused for days at this point.

They went back under the yellow apple, sliding onto their knees, turning their head towards the plush grass to pick up the gauntlet.

The ring of wine purple bruises caught Ralsei's attention, and he shuffled towards it with a moment of fretting, "Your- I.. I mean.. Kris' hand, it's.. here, let me..." Ralsei stammered, holding his hand out.

The SOUL looked at the bruise with a sad frown, wordlessly offering Kris' palm to Ralsei. The suddenness made him step back before he regained his nerve. The SOUL watched closely at what happened next. To be healed... It felt minty and warm. "Thank you..B.. But, S- Ss.. Susie's hand..." It commented, pointing to her shredded knuckles.

Susie pulled her hand behind her back, "Hey! Tsh, don't worry 'bout it, Ralsei. I'll deal with it." She said, "We got bigger stuff to worry about." The SOUL gave a grim nod of agreement, knowing what was next made what little levity the interaction gave them vanish.

From Kris' sheath it slid the Black Shard, the soft yellow lighting of the Dark World garden cast the harsh form in a fuzzy silhouette. "Asgore." It said, holding the knife up to them, "B...Big sword." It tapped the fuller of the shard expectantly. " He... Didn't mean to. I-I think he.. he's gonna k.."

It dropped the Shard onto the grass and muttered 'shit' under its breath, "You're okay." It said to no one, sharp eyes looking past the dagger.

A loud and low growl ripped through Kris' throat. This was hard. Talking like this was hard. Knowing that they wouldn't understand what the hell it was trying to say. Worse, that they wouldn't believe it. Still, [you] could feel that kid, face covered, hiding. Too scared to advocate for themselves or whatever their goal was.

So the SOUL persisted, "He want to kill t-the Knight, or the.. the.." It reached the raw edge of what it could say, feeling the body resist, "Fuck! T-th.. The CAT." It snapped

Chapter Text

A hand on the shoulder. That's all it took. Then Kris saw clearly, for what felt like the first time. That hand was all that was needed to slide those loose memories into context like a long lost puzzle piece.

Asriel was normal.

He was acting perfectly normal, that is to say.

It was always confounding to see Asriel. The Always Golden Boy. Not just in their family, no, but in all of Home Town. Everyone in Hometown had their flaws, none moreso than the Dreemurr family with their pension for publicity and their lack of self awareness. But Asriel? He seemingly met each of the family's fatal flaws and he rose above them in ways they could never hope to. He was charismatic, observant, outgoing with a genuine way of carrying himself. He was a people pleaser, and he was the best at it. He was Good in a way that the family simply was not. And simply never would be.

And he was acting like he always did.

So why? Why today did his behavior set off pins and needles in Kris? It had nothing to do with college or with dealing with his parents or with his upcoming presentation. Was it that Asriel knew that Kris was involved in the prophecy again? The way the SOUL was present, was it coloring their perception of him, maybe? Was it that he knew... something else... they were involved in? Every moment felt like there was someone watching them over their shoulder. Well, aside from..

Kris investigated this strangeness off and on all day as they appeared to follow their usual family routine. When the three of them were walking to QC's Diner, Toriel was talking about visiting the Holidays with their him when he did a check-in on Kris. It was something he did often. When Kris was too quiet or too still for too long, Asriel would turn to look at them, smile softly, and pat their shoulder. It was inviting, a gentle way of signaling that even when they were quiet, they were included without any pressure for comment. Although Kris loathed any physical contact from their parents, they always liked the fraternal gesture of jostling them or ruffling their hair. Asriel was always their person.

But this time was different.
This time the touch of his palm against their shoulder arced to their brain like lightning. And then they remembered. They were pulled back into that red wagon for a split second before they were snapped back to the sidewalk. The SOUL, too, was struck with the aftershock, involuntarily pulling Kris a staggered step away from his open hand as if he was a live wire. The moment of shock settled into a realization. Right. That strange feeling building up wasn't their anxiety. That soot black sensation that his hand shot through their skin when he grazed their shoulder, that wasn't random at all. That's where Asriel held them down. He had both of his hands on Kris' shoulders when it happened, barely using enough pressure to still their writhing. The feeling of being cored like an apple with Asriel's hands on their shoulders, his white face turned away in shame.
That memory and most of what proceeded and preceded was carefully, intentionally blotted out before the SOUL brought it kicking and screaming back into the light. The revelation, though initially nightmarish and devouring had left Kris feeling different. Kris hoped that they only had to remember it once, but it hung around Asriel's face like an epitaph. They realized, walking to the diner, that as the days passed... They were finally gaining back their awareness, veil lifting to the world around them, despite the waves of guilt and horror that seemed to slice at them. Kris Dreemurr was awake. Kris Dreemurr was Real again. And they, for the first time in their life, didn't want to be near Asriel. Not at all.

As Kris quietly let the chain of thought and realization roll through them, they were sitting in the diner waiting. Asriel and Toriel on one side and Kris on the other. The family, waiting patiently for Asgore. A compromise to having the whole family together without the awkwardness of having them cramped in the flower shop or overly familiar at home.

Now, as Kris was sitting in the red plastic booth, watching gray clouds roll in from the window, they felt like they were seeing Asriel completely differently. The friendliness towards them, the way he would always put them first. It was an apology, wasn't it? No, it was penance. Asriel, in his childish naivety, believed that with enough rituals of kindness, what, he could earn forgiveness? Forgiveness for something he didn't even have the dignity to address. It was laughable. Asriel's flaw, though not as outward as his parents or Kris, was that he was always a coward, someone who followed the loudest voice in the room. It made perfect sense that he would bow to December's schemes, allow Bratty to command their sibling to exchange favors and food for attention, quietly duck his head to the will and threats of Carol Holiday. He left Home Town, but he never escaped, not in a way that mattered. Kris shook their head to change their train of thought as their line of thinking turned violent.

"What are you drawing?" Toriel asked, forcing Kris to peek their head out of the self-made black cloud. They blinked, seeing that the SOUL had slid the Jingle Blade out of their pocket and been doodling on the paper placemat for at least a few minutes without them even noticing. Kris scrutinized the drawings like an anthropologist at work, grateful to think about anything else. A funny looking bird, a star, a heart that was partially scribbled in, an oblong blobby thing that- Oh, was that supposed to be Susie? Kris' stoic expression cracked into a begrudging smile as they recognized themself in their festival outfit next to her, a sharky smile drawn over half of their face.

"Nothin'." Kris responded, more truthfully than anyone realized. What a stupid, stupid SOUL, wasting time like this, "... Where's dad?" Kris took the pencil and added a leash onto the scribbled out heart and looped it into their hand with a haughty smirk.

Toriel heaved a sigh and tried not to look annoyed, casting a glare out of the window with her lips pursed, "I do not know. He had suggested this, I believed he would be here first." After a second of thought she stood up, smoothing her dress as she did so, "I can go to fetch him. You two enjoy yourselves... and order me a tea if she returns." She offered a strained smile before she left.

Then it was Kris and Asriel. And the SOUL. Asriel watched Toriel take a shortcut through the alleyways to the Flower King shop as he drummed his paws on the edge of the table.

"You okay, Bub?" He asked softly, his amber eyes turning to meet Kris', who was staring straight at him.

Kris didn't say anything. The SOUL was fast with the options they handed them. Confrontation. Placation. A few in between. But Kris just looked at them, read them carefully, and kept their mouth shut.

Asriel was bristled, smile falling slack, "I know... But, y'know. He's still our Dad and we love him. Even if he's... Y'know." He started twisting his straw wrapper nervously, looking down at Kris' drawings.

"Heh, is that Susie?" He asked. He pulled a pen out and began adding the Festival to the background. The Ferris wheel with Asriel in sunglasses riding at the top in frequent, light pen strokes, "ta da,"

That anger Kris started with was already starting to cool. Even as Kris tried desperately to hold onto it, their rage and disgust and betrayal was being met with someone so gentle. Like slicing their sword through a pile of feathers. The more they watched him unknowingly draw with the SOUL, the more Kris just felt... Sad. They saw behind the curtain. This Golden Boy, no.. Big brother with his soft smiles and hopes and dreams.
He was a murderer, and his alibi sat across from him, wearing his handcuffs. Pathetic.

The pen stopped abruptly, mid-lift from where Asriel was drawing the apple bobbing station.
"K-Kris... What.. what's what, buddy?" Asriel tried to hide a tremble in his voice. His finger traced along the leash doodle-Kris was holding to the SOUL.

Kris looked up at their brother, really looking into his eyes that time. That fear. All of his sins, crawling up his skin and under his sweater as he nervously looked back with a smile.

The answer, bitter and disturbing and blood red, was cut short by Asriel's phone ringing. He took the out, especially grateful when he saw his mother's contact photo.

Kris watched his nervous smile shift to confusion as he gave an unanswered hello. They couldn't hear anything coming from the receiver, based on how Asriel covered his other ear, he wasn't gathering much more. He sputtered out a few more attempts to reach someone on the other end without any appearance of a response. Then the shouting, tinny from the phone signal, reached Kris. A familiar sound, Toriel's bitter shout, mixed with their father's.

He hung up, standing from the diner booth abruptly, stuffing the phone and his hand in his pocket, "I dunno what's happening but-... all I heard was yelling on the other end." He sighed bitterly, sneering towards the direction of the shop, "They couldn't even give us a single day, huh? Ugh, I... Really think I should go over there. You should--"

He knew it was fruitless as Kris stood up, sliding the jingle blade back into the junk in their pocket. He sighed, "Yeah, okay, it'll probably take both of us to redirect them anyways."

Pavement. Grass. Asriel was trying desperately to avoid thinking about what just happened, the little glimpse into his worst nightmare recurring, and paid attention to everything else he could spy. Kris was equally avoidant, the bravery they felt in the diner solidified into shame at what they dared think about their big brother. They reached The Flower King just in time to see Toriel storming out. Her face was steely, frightened. She didn't even seem to notice either of them, breezing past like a ghost.

The SOUL was the one who made Kris keep going, pushing them tentatively to follow their brother as he raced down the steps to the cellar of the shop. Kris thought, then obeyed, following the trail even though they were sure that nothing good would come from this. Once they entered through the door they saw Asgore standing, looking caught like a guilty dog. Asriel was in the doorway, arms slack and eyes wide as he took in the corkboard, the weapon, his father, the evidence, the pictures, the keys, the nightmare. His nightmare compounded. It was happening again.

"W.. What is this? Dad... Dad, what- What is all of this?" Asriel sputtered, tugging at his ears as he struggled to take it in. The corkboard. The notes, evidence of that horrible night in living color, strung up like a school project. December. Oh, Dess, her tenth grade yearbook photo smiling at him with a pushpin stuck in her antler, a thread connecting her to a drawing of a black scribbly thing, to print outs of news articles, to her AMBER Alert posting, to a... a picture of Kris. She hated that picture, taken a week after she had gotten her braces off she thought her teeth looked too crooked when she smiled like that, but she was wearing the necklace Asriel had on. If he could have told her that night-

Whatever Asgore's answer was, his arms outstretched and his tone cautious, Kris didn't hear it. Kris could see Asriel start to crack, see their dad plying with a self assured smile. The argument recurs. Like time had never passed, Asriel and Asgore arguing. Mom is somewhere else, somewhere else with her eyes turned away.
But all Kris could focus on now was the sword leaning against the wall. Opaque black blade, the light made its cutting edge soft like a spear of pure shadow. Put it through your palm, Kris. The Black Shard was thin like a fillet knife, its grip made only of KT tape, deranged and unfit to be seen.

"Where did you get that?" Kris numbly blurted out, pointing at it. Made of pure darkness, it leaned against the wall as though it wasn't a violation of the nature of things.

"Kris, you... You know what that thing is!?" Asriel cried, betrayal flashing across his face.

Asgore's black eyes lit up as he turned to his blade, his smile warm and paternal, "It's the answer to all of our problems, kids. This lovely thing.." He took it up in his hands, holding it gently with a reverence Kris couldn't fathom, "I spent years building this from chips and shards, chasing that thing down the streets at night, through the woods. Like Captain Ahab. Until I finally had enough.... Enough to make this whole. "

Kris staggered back at the answer. He had been...? How long had he been chasing after them and the Knight? How close had he gotten? He didn't have anything to catch the Knight's calls, but he saw her in the Light World?

"Dad, that's! That's just glass! It's just a stupid novelty sword! This is what you.. W-What..." Asriel was clutching at his hair, eyes bloodshot as he fought against angry tears.

"Why can't-- W-Why can't you just MOVE ON!" Asriel screamed, Slamming his hand against the door with a clattering bang that scattered dust.

His shout made them both flinch away. But Asriel was incensed now, "Just- J-Just move on! You guys can't.. You can't undo it, alright?! Both of you spent the last three years stuck in time!" He was past the point of angry tears.

Kris bucked their head back, still staring at the black shard. They didn't have it in them to respond. To say the obvious out loud and make it real.

"I understand, my son. When you see it, when I finally show you what I saw..." Asgore met his son's fury and rage with a cautious patience that only incensed both of his children further.

"NO! I- I don't-- I don't care what you saw! You can't stop trying to be right for one second!" He shouted, clutching the doorframe as his face reddened. "We were waiting for you! And you and mom HAD to- to-"

Kris was approaching the Black Shard, the argument tarnished into white noise above them, the icy sound of a family falling apart again reflecting in its cutting edge. Their own shard sheathed where their knife usually laid felt heavy. It felt urgent. They needed to get it away from both of them. They argued above them. It's not like it mattered anyway.

Kris was holding Asgore's sword now, the SOUL giving them option after option until the only option left was "GET OUT", trembling their arms and trying to uncurl their fingers.

When the fountain opened, Kris and the SOUL both saw it. Asriel and Asgore saw it. Pupil and Sclera and Teeth and Grin. And it saw them all in return. As the flume of Dark spilled out from the open wound in the cement floor, it crawled towards them like clumping soil from a slit bag, its face at the same angle no matter how its segmented form rolled towards them. That recognition, in the reflection of its eyes, changed them both.

It was like, for just a split second, when the darkness subsumed the room around them, that Kris and The SOUL were two bodies standing in tandem. Just for a moment did they both exist in nebulous outlines somewhere between dark and light. And in that moment, Kris didn't run from them. Didn't strike as they were certain they would. Instead, they cowered. They cowered behind the SOUL. With their hands twisted up in its shirt and their forehead pressed hard into their back. A child, afraid. And their shield wrapping a hand around their arm in return.

Then.
The SOUL was in the garden, sitting crumpled under the apple tree. It brushed Kris' arms softly, tenderly, crying tears that belonged to someone who felt very far away.