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“American Airlines flight 6138 from London Heathrow is delayed. Please check the arrivals board for more information.”
It’s the first thing Alec hears as he enters the arrivals lounge of JFK. The distortion from the speakers gives the woman's voice an almost mocking tone. He takes out his phone. There's nineteen missed calls, all from Izzy.
He dials her number and she picks up on the first ring.
“Alec? What happened? I’ve been calling for hours.”
“I was in the car, I couldn’t answer. Have you landed yet?”
“We’re only just boarding.”
“You’re kidding me.”
“Apparently there’s a lot of snow your end and it’s only just starting to clear up. It’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. Wait, give me a second." He hears he talking to whom he presumes is a member of staff. "We're due to land at JFK at half past five, if all goes according to plan. So go home, get some sleep. You sound like you need it."
"I can't, New York is gridlocked right now because of the snow. It took me three hours just to get here.” He sighs as he looks at the arrivals lounge, soulless and white. It’s a rather uninspiring place to spend nearly eight hours. “I'll wait here. It's fine, really."
There's a long silence on the end of the line.
"Look Alec, I was going to say this when I got here, but I want you to take some time to think about it; I meant it when I said it makes no difference if I study in London or New York. I've already had a discussion with my tutor about transferring my credits, so if you want me to stay-"
"Izzy you didn't need to come in the first place. Everything’s okay. That night… it was just a fluke. I don’t even know what happened."
He can almost hear her eye roll across the phone. "I'm coming whether you like it or not Alec. Look, they're asking for my ticket now. I have to go. Love you."
“Love you too Izzy.”
The phone disconnects and Alec is left standing alone in the middle of JFK
He scowls at the arrivals board, and out of the corner of his eye catches a stranger, phone in hand, mirroring his expression. Apparently someone's stuck in the same situation as he is.
The stranger cuts a striking figure in the arrivals hall. The modern, monochrome arrivals hall only serves to contrast against the man’s attire; he’s dressed in emerald and gunmetal, the light glinting off a plethora of bangles on his wrist.
Alec is sure that the harsh fluorescent lighting personally just makes him look tired and pale, but on the stranger it compliments his striking features, highlighting his high cheekbones, his strong jaw, tilted defiantly up at the arrivals board.
They make eye contact, and Alec realises he's been staring much too long. The man's mouth curls into an amused smile and his eyes glitter. They look almost golden.
Alec dismisses it as a trick of the light, and tears his eyes away. He looks up at the arrivals board once again.
---
"American Airlines 6138 from London Heathrow?"
Alec snaps his head up from his phone, where he’s been mindlessly scrolling through news sites for the past half hour. It's the man from earlier, stood close enough for Alec to see glitter fallout on his cheekbones.
"I'm sorry?"
"You're waiting for the same flight as me, aren't you? Apparently they're only just boarding."
"Yeah." Alec replies, still slightly bemused. "It won't be here for another eight hours."
The man smiles, as if the concept of being stuck in the airport that long was a blessing and not a curse. He presses a coffee into Alec's hands.
"For you. You looked like you were about to nod off."
"I can't accept this."
"Oh don't be silly. If it genuinely upsets you that much, maybe you can take me for coffee one day to make it up to me?"
Alec frowns. "I really can't do that. I - uh - have a girlfriend."
The man raises his eyebrows theatrically. "I'd never have guessed. And you ought to know, typically most people don't say that sentence with a grimace. But it's fine. It's a cup of coffee, not a marriage proposal."
Alec winces slightly at the choice of words. Marriage is the last thing he wants to think of at this time. Still, the coffee is very much welcome in the cold of the airport terminal.
"Thank you." he says.
"No problem." The man waves a heavily ringed hand and turns to leave.
"Wait." Alec calls out, surprising himself. "You don't have to go. We're going to be here a while, we might as well spend it together." Alec squints down at the scrawled writing on the coffee cup. "Marcus?"
The man huffs in exasperation, but it's paired with a smile, the most dazzling one yet. "Magnus. Magnus Bane. Wretched baristas can never get my name right. And you are?"
"Alec Lightwood." Despite everything that’s happened to Alec this past week, and the frustrating situation he’s stuck in now, he can't help but smile.
---
Time seems to fly in Magnus' company. Magnus is a fantastic raconteur, with a myriad of stories of celebrity encounters and drunken misadventures that Alec is ninety percent sure are made up, but are entertaining none the less.
The arrivals board switches from 'scheduled' to 'en route' and Alec wonders if the wait will be so bad after all.
"I have to ask," Magnus says after winding up a tale about a threesome with an Italian prince and a nun, "Who is the lucky person you're waiting eight hours in a snowstorm for?"
"My sister. Izzy. She's studying at Kings in London, but she's over here for a visit."
"Is she planning to see your parents?"
"No. They're not on good terms." Alec feels the discussion veering in exactly the direction he wants to avoid. "She’s just coming here because she feels the need to check up on me. Some things happened and she overreacted and booked a flight here. It's ridiculous, really."
"Do you want to talk about it? I'll have you know I'm actually a qualified therapist."
Alec looks sceptical. "You can’t be serious."
"You're right. I actually own a nightclub in Brooklyn. But the offer still stands. I'm a fantastic listener."
"I'd really rather not."
"Fine. But I do think it would do you some good. And hey, after this we never have to see each other again, so your secrets will be safe with me."
Oddly, the sentence doesn't comfort him as much as it should.
---
At eleven the snow starts to clear, and the first flights come through. Magnus makes up little stories about the passengers that filter through the gates.
"You see that girl there, the redhead? She's hopelessly in love with that blonde guy who just got off the plane, but in a shocking development she's recently discovered that he's actually her long lost brother. What's more, he's just came back after running off to Germany to help their father with his criminal empire. Meanwhile she's been in New York caring for their mother, who's quite tragically been in a coma for the past year following a rare allergy to a common herbal remedy."
"You are so full of shit." Alec replies, but does nothing to mask the smile on his face. He shocks himself with the affection he hears in his voice. He wasn't aware it was possible to feel so fondly for someone he'd only just met.
He watches as a girl with a wild afro and a backpack bigger than herself all but runs across the terminal to plant a kiss squarely on the lips of a tall blonde at the barriers.
Alec looks away. Magnus sighs wistfully.
"Don't you just think there's something so romantic about airports?" he murmurs.
"Not really."
"No?"
"I don't see what's romantic about them. I just associate them with being frustrated and bored."
"What about the reunions? Lovers separated by thousands of miles reuniting at long last?" He assumes an expression of mock horror. "Don't tell me you haven't seen Love Actually?"
Alec shoots him a withering look. "I haven't, and I don't intend to. All that romantic nonsense bores me."
"I bet your girlfriend thinks you're tonnes of fun."
The conversation grinds to a halt.
"I'm sorry." Magnus says, with genuine sincerity. "I know that you don't want to talk about it."
"It's okay." Alec forces a smile. "Tell me another story."
Magnus scans the crowd, then settles on silver haired young man frowning at his phone.
"Now that boy, the one with the frankly disastrous bleach job, would you believe he's a senseless victim of illegal human experimentation..."
---
"You never said who you were waiting for." Alec realises around midnight.
"You're right, I haven't." Magnus pops a sweet in his mouth. He'd disappeared shortly before the shops closed to "get food", and came back with an armful of sweets and chocolates, a game of travel Scrabble and a large grin on his face. "I'm waiting for my friend Ragnor. He lives near London and he's a writer, fantasy and sci-fi mostly. He’s considered rather eccentric and reclusive even by authors’ standards."
"How do you know him?"
"He went to college here. Hated every second of it, moaned constantly about how the chocolate was too bitter and he couldn't get a good cup of tea. But he was a kind person, as much as he hated to admit it, and we were good friends. The kind of person you don't mind spending eight hours in an airport terminal for. I take it your sister's the same."
"Yeah. Izzy means the world to me."
"I suppose Ragnor's the closest thing I have to a family member." He catches Alec's distressed look. "Oh Alexander, there's no need for any of that. I never knew my parents, and from what I've heard about them, I wouldn't have wanted to. Given the choice, I'd pick that grumpy Brit, every time."
"Tell me more about him."
Magnus nods, and starts recounting stories of his college days, truthful ones, this time.
When he finishes Magnus has an unreadable expression on his face; brows furrowed but eyes wistful. "I find it very easy, talking to you. I'm normally a lot more closed off."
And Alec panics. He’d noticed the connection between them but when it was only in his own head, it was a lot easier to dismiss.
There can’t be anything between them. There is no place for Magnus in the story set out for Alec as anything more than a ship passing in the night.
Alec scrambles to put some space between them. "It's probably because we don't know each other at all. It's easier to open up to someone if you know you're never going to see them again. You said it yourself."
Magnus brow furrows even further, and he looks as if he wants to say something, but seems to think better of it. He glances down at his phone (resplendent in a pink case stating 'glitter is my favorite color'). "Half one in the morning.” He says to no-one in particular. “Half way there." He sounds almost sad.
---
By 2 am, the airport has taken on an eerie air. Without people filling it, the vast whiteness of terminal seems otherworldly. For a moment, Alec feels the odd sensation that Magnus and him are the only people left in the world.
Between the white terminal and the blanket of snow outside, the only colour it seems, comes from the red 'delayed' on the arrivals board, and from Magnus', well, everything.
Magnus it seemed, was starting to flag. His storytelling was becoming less energetic and more and more frequently punctuated by yawns.
"Look, get some sleep." Alec says eventually. “You don't have to stay awake on my account."
"Well, I suppose this is the only chance I’ll get to wake up to your face. I'll take a brief nap."
Magnus falls asleep almost instantly, and Alec breathes a sigh of relief.
Being around Magnus is exhausting. Every time Magnus looks at him, it’s as if a thousand half formed thoughts appear in Alec’s head; snatches of a future between them, fantasies that make Alec blush. And just when he thinks he’s banished them Magnus would smile, or laugh and a thousand more would take their place. With Magnus asleep, Alec maybe has a chance to attempt to clear his head.
Magnus fidgets in his sleep, leans his head against the back of the chair and then settles it on Alec's shoulder. Another thousand thoughts float through his mind just out of reach, like snowflakes in a storm.
---
It's half three, and Alec feels more awake than he ever has in his life. He tries to blame the hard airport seats, the lights, the occasional roar of the planes overhead for why he can't sleep, but it's hopeless of course. It can't explain the way his heart thuds like someone hammering on upon a door, why the spot where Magnus' forehead rests on Alec's cheek seems to burn.
Okay. So he's attracted to Magnus. That much is clear. But it doesn't have to mean anything. It can't mean anything.
Nothing can come of it, not with so much at stake. Whatever he has here with Magnus ends as soon as they leave the airport. Hadn't Magnus said as much himself?
He hears Magnus' voice in his head: "After this, we'll never have to see each other again."
Alec looks at the delayed message on the arrivals board, the very same little word that has been taunting him all night, and wills it to stay, just a little longer.
---
It's nearly five when Magnus wakes up. His hair is flat on one side and there's traces of kohl smudged under his eyes. Alec finds it hopelessly endearing.
"Sleep well?" Alec asks.
"Oh yes." He regards Alec sleepily. "Had a very pleasant dream in which Beyonce dropped a new album. Dodos were involved, somehow. Did you get any sleep?"
Alec chooses not to share the epiphany that had kept him awake "No. I've not been sleeping well lately."
"I don't mean to be rude, but you look like you need it. Don't worry, you still look incredibly handsome, just in a more… rugged way."
Alec doesn't respond. He probably does look a mess, with his dark circles and rumpled shirt.
"I'm fine." he mutters. It's completely unconvincing.
"You don't look it. Alexander I have to say, I am a little worried-"
"Don't be.” he snaps. "It's enough that my sister is flying all this way to check up on me, I don't need it from you." He regrets it right away. None of this was Magnus' fault, or Izzy's.
"I'm sorry." He searches desperately for something honest to say.
"Things aren't great at the moment, but I feel a lot better talking to you." He says, and he means it. He takes a deep breath. "I'd like to tell you what's been going on with my parents, and my girlfriend, if that's okay with you."
There’s no answer from Magnus, whose gaze is elsewhere. Alec follows it to the arrivals board. Flight 6138 reads 'landed', instead of 'en route'. They have ten, maybe fifteen minutes before the passengers get through security.
“Oh.” Alec’s face falls.
Magnus smiles weakly.“They’ve still got to get through security, and baggage reclaim. We have some time. I’m listening.”
Alec reaches into his pocket and pulls out the ring. It feels so much heavier than such a small thing ought to.
"It was my grandmother's. My mother gave it to me last week, expecting me to propose. There's this girl, Lydia, and her father owns a company that's considering a merger with my parents' firm. A year ago she asked me on a date and I said yes, thinking it would get my parents off my back about me finding a girlfriend. But it's all gotten out of hand."
"You don't love her?"
"I thought I could, eventually. If I tried hard enough."
Magnus looks concerned. "That's not how love works, Alexander."
"I know." I know that now.
Magnus pauses to get his thoughts together. "So does this Lydia girl know you're gay?"
"She asked me once and I didn't say anything. Then she asked if I wanted to stay together and I nodded. That was it really."
"Then why don't you call it off? Tell your mother it won't work?"
"I spoke to my mother, and I told her I couldn't go through with it. It didn't get anywhere."
"What did she say?"
"She said 'Don't let me down, Alec'. And then she shut the door on me.” Alec feels his voice waver, but presses on. “I got home and called Izzy even though it was the middle of the night there, and I was a mess, Magnus. I couldn't stop crying and she must have thought I was going to do something stupid, because she postponed her exams and booked a flight for New York, all I because I can't -"
His words are lost in a choked sob, though he's not all that sure what he was going to say. Can't love Lydia, even though she's beautiful and kind? Can't stop being selfish? Can't follow orders even though that's the one thing he's ever been good at doing?
He’s not sure what emotion he expects to see on Magnus’ face when he looks up at him, but anger certainly isn’t it.
"It has nothing to do with what you can or can't do.” Magnus says sharply. “You shouldn't have to. No one should have to put aside all their wants for a family that doesn't even deserve them."
"What I want is for my family to be happy." He wishes he believed it as much as he used to.
"And that's it?" Any control in Magnus’ voice is gone. "You don't want anything more?"
If he'd been asked that question eight hours ago when he walked into JFK, he could have answered yes without hesitation, without doubt. But now? Now there's Magnus, and Alec doesn't love him, not yet, but he wants him, more than anything. Wants first kisses and thousandth kisses and all those in between.
He wants, and it's terrifying and exhilarating and the last damn thing he needs right now.
"I didn't." His gaze flickers down to Magnus' lips. They linger there, too long to be an accident. "I do now."
Alec kisses him. He's hesitant at first, but when Magnus' lips part he wonders how he could have ever had any doubt over something that feels so right. He cups Magnus' face with a shaking hand and feels it settle, the tips of his fingers in Magnus' hair.
There’s the sound of a door flinging open. They break apart. In that moment the immense, empty terminal feels stifling and airless. He stumbles back away from Magnus.
"Alec!" a voice, unmistakably Izzy’s, calls out from across the terminal.
She runs toward him and sweeps him into a tight hug, nearly knocking him out with a bag in her hand. As she pulls away, she notices his dazed expression. “Alec? What’s the matter?”
"Nothing.” He picks up her suitcase. “I’m just tired of airports. Can we get going?”
Izzy gives him a funny look, but nods. As they walk to the exit, he feels Magnus' eyes burning into his back.
Magnus calls his name. Alec doesn't turn around.
---
The traffic hasn’t abated even a bit when they leave. A trail of stationary vehicles stretches far as Alec can see. Izzy, who seems no worse for wear for her lack of sleep, takes full advantage of Alec’s lack of an escape route.
“Who was that man in the airport?”
“No one.” Alec doesn’t look away from the road ahead of him.
“He called out to you.”
“We talked as we were waiting for the flight. That’s it.”
“So why didn’t you say goodbye? I hate to break it to you Alec, but you don’t exactly have friends to spare, and if you got on well with this-“
“Izzy. Drop it.”
Izzy, in a moment that shocks absolutely no one, refuses to follow instructions.
“Did something happen? Did you argue?”
“I’m not going to talk about it.”
“Would you rather we talk about that phone call last week? Because I think-“
“We talked. I thought there was something there. I kissed him.”
It has the benefit of making Izzy go silent for all of five seconds.
“And?” she says, searching Alec’s face.
“And nothing, Izzy. It’s over. I walked away.”
“You know Alec, there was no point in me coming here if you’re just going to do everything in your power to keep yourself unhappy.”
“There was no point in you coming here at all! Everything’s fine, I’m fine.”
His voice cracks on the last word, his eyes are red, and his hands on the steering wheel are shaky.
There is silence in the car.
“This guy really did a number on you, huh?” Izzy says eventually.
“I don’t think I’ve ever felt like that for anyone.”
“So why walk away?”
“It’s just I have everything all set out. I marry Lydia. Mom and Dad get their deal. There’s no place for some stranger from an airport on that path.”
“I know. But all that path is leading to is you being unhappy.”
Izzy is right, as always. But it doesn’t make what Alec has to do any easier.
“I don’t know what to do. There’s so much to think about.”
Izzy gestures to the unmoving traffic in front of them. “We’ve got no shortage of time. Talk to me Alec. We can sort this out.”
---
The car pulls into Alec’s drive at ten am, and the Lightwoods stumble out. Alec’s certain he’s never felt this tired in his life, but at the same time he feels buoyant, hopeful. In his hand he clutches a list with three items on it, written in Izzy’s loopy cursive.
For the first time in weeks, Alec gets a full night's sleep.
---
1. Tell mom to go fuck herself.
He stands in the doorway of his parents' house and takes the ring out of his pocket. His mother raises an eyebrow.
"I'm not giving this to Lydia. I think Grandmother would have wanted this to go to someone I love.” He looks her in the eye. “I hope one day you could want the same for me."
He doesn't give her a chance to reply.
---
2. Break things off with Lydia (NICELY!!)
Lydia seems to know what he’s going to say before he even opens his mouth.
“It’s okay.” She says. “I figured this would happen at some point.”
“Will you be alright?”
“Not right away, but eventually. Give me some time.” She smiles slightly. Alec turns to go and she stops him with a hand on his arm.”
“Was there anyone else?” she asks. “I’m not angry or anything, just curious.”
“There might be. I’m hopeful.”
Her smile widens. “He’s a lucky man, go get him.”
---
3. Find Magnus. Apologise. Ask him on a date.
Magnus regards him warily.
"How did you find me?"
"To be honest? I googled 'Magnus Bane night club owner'. I went down to your club yesterday, and the lady who works there said you get your coffee here at ten every morning."
"I suppose it's lucky my name isn't John Smith. Next question: What on Earth are you doing here? You were the one who ran out on me, need I remind you."
"I had things to do. It wouldn't have been fair on Lydia to start something with you.”
"And now?" Alec supposes that Magnus intends to sound irritated, but the phrase sounds hopeful.
"I ended it. And I gave my parents back their ring.”
“Well good for you. Now if that’s all you came to say, I’m going to head off.” He snatches his coffee off the counter and turns to leave.
"I still owe you a coffee.” Magnus pauses. “Look," Alec continues, "I’d never forgive myself if I didn’t get to see how this thing between us plays out. I want this, Magnus.”
Magnus' fingers hover over the door handle.
“It’s a coffee, not a marriage proposal.”
Magnus closes the door. “One coffee. And we’ll see where we go from there. Okay?”
"Okay." Alec beams.
---
It’s dark by the time the two of them leave, Magnus’ hand clutched tightly in Alec’s own as the snow falls around them.