Work Text:
-LIAM'S POV-
I'm sitting on my bed, doing my homework when a chilly feeling crawls down the back of my neck, drawing my hand to it unconsciously. I grunt from the uncomfortable sensation, trying to cover the entire span of my neck with my hands. As soon as I get it warm, however, it travels down to my stomach, a weird feeling deep in my abdomen - an untouchable itch. The clock suddenly ticks in the back of my mind, way to loud to be real. I look out the window, now very aware of the darkness coming through my curtains and highlighting my walls.
I shiver again, wiggling my body around to try to release some of the pressure. My heartbeat unconsciously starts to rise, speeding my breathing up in a weak attempt to contain my racing pulse. My heart clenches painfully, reminding me of a heart attack. I clutch my chest, gasping for air. I don't know whats going on, why my heart is going a thousand miles per hour, why I can't settle the feeling in my stomach and back, shoulders too - and why I can't fucking breath.
I widen my eyes, realizing with a painful jolt that my desperate gasps for air aren't doing anything, that my lungs are devoid of precious oxygen. I've felt this before, this crushing pressure in my chest, the lightness in my head making me see faint stars. Whenever I feel this its because I need someones touch, I need somebody else's hands to be tracing my skin, magically relieving my anxiety and calming my heart. Unfortunately, my parents are out of town, and Mason and Corey are busy doing stuff, most likely sleeping. I've never had this happen before at night, only in the day - that is, if it happens at all - so I can't ask them for help. As much as I'd like to get rid of this disgusting sensation, I would rather shove my foot in my mouth than bother someone about anything in the middle of the night.
Its overwhelming, this block in my throat that is stopping my air flow. I feel like I'm drowning (I'm, drowning~), slipping into a panic that doesn't feel good on any levels, feeling out of control, barely aware of my mouth when it lets a low whine out, surprising me with its pitiful grasp, completely numb to the tears dripping down my face. Never before has it been this bad, my chest and entire body spasming with fright. I'm forced to let out a dry sob, reveling in the sweet, miniscule gust of air that follows it into my lungs. The action repeats itself, until my lungs stop burning, but the internal itch to be touched by someone in a comforting way still remains, not satisfied by anything I've done in the last 10 minutes. I let out a low whine, savouring the quiet flow of oxygen that manages to make its way into my chest. I don't process anything else, focusing only on keeping my heartbeat slow. It works a little bit, to a fault, it seems.
I realize too late that my window is rattling, signalling someone else's arrival on my roof. I whimper around my gasps for more luscious air, crawling backwards into the corner of my room. I slide down untill I'm all but cowering in the corner like a small kid. I can't help it, feeling powerless and weak in my state. I hear the window slide open, the gust of wind blowing the curtains around. Theres a moment of silence when all I can hear is the clock ticking, my raspy breathes filling the room. Then, before I can call out to ask who's there, the curtain pushes aside, swallowing a dark figure into my room. My sense of smell is delayed, allowing whoever is here to reside in mystery. I whimper pitifully, grabbing a gaming controller from my desk, aiming to throw it.
"W-who's -there?" I huff out, still rasping slightly for breath. They walk towards me, slowly illuminating themselves in my bedside lamp.
"Woah! Its just me, little wolf. Just Theo,” he replies, holding his hands up and dropping down to his knees in front of me, eyes tracing my body and settling on my face with a look that I can't quite distinguish. The hot tears that I just now understand are falling down my face pool at my lips, only slipping unto my mouth when I try to suck in air again, painting my tongue in salt.
I gasp when I feel enough oxygen enter my chest, surging forward and jumping up slightly albeit leaping into Theo's arms and practically strangling him with how tight my arms are around his neck. He gasps in shock, which seems to be the sound of the day. I whimper again, digging my nose into the crook of his neck, inhaling his sweet scent, lips pursing against his smooth, soft, supple skin. I started calling it the 'S' category, of all the three things skin should be. Theo manages to tick off each one, leaving my heart racing for a different reason. I've known for awhile that I like Theo, but now isn't the time, I have bigger problems.
"Fuck, Little wolf. Are you okay-?"
"Theo, you need to touch me." we both blush at the obvious double-meaning - well, that's why I'm flushed. Theos ears are probably pink because he's thinking something entirely different. He squawks, the fingers that were resting on my shirt gripping my hips.
"W-what?" he asks, eyes wide with shock now that I'm puling back from where my head was resting peacefully in his neck. I feel the roughness in my throat, the dryness making my breaths even harder. I shake my head gently, still shivering.
"No, not like that. I-I just need you to put your skin on mine." I can see he's still confused, so I whimper quietly into his shoulder before leaning back again, having to explain better. "I'm-having an anxiety attack, and I need to have physical-" I rasp deep in my throat, softly clawing at where its burning, "'-touch. My parents aren't home-"
Theo interrupts, leaning backwards and stripping off his shirt, mine following closely, the useless garments being tossed across the room. But neither of us care, too involved in the dry, warm drag of skin when he pushes me into him, his arms and intoxicating hands traveling up and down my back, fingers dipping into the small of my back. I sigh, melting into his embrace, slinking forward until I'm sitting on his lap, legs wrapped around him comfortably and my eyes closed, enjoying our proximity a little too much. He hums, crooking his head and pressing soft kisses along my shoulder.
"All better, pup?" Theo inquires, scratching blunt nails across my back. I can't find it in me to do anything but press closer and whimper yet again, long since practically claiming the sound for my own, tears wet against my face - and probably his neck too. I feel my chest shake when I try to say something, anything, in reply, trembling in his arms like a sad puppy. My mouth lets slip a pitiful cry, painting my face pink with embarrassment. "Oh, Li. You poor thing. Come here." he murmurs into my ear, lips touching the shell of it. I gently sob into his neck.
"Oh, darling." he whispers, nosing at my hair gently, soft warm fingers tracing the line of my back, massaging my muscles. I sigh contently, feeling my heart slow and my muscles relax. Only now, now that I can think straight, I realize just how close we are - how little space I would have to move to meet my mouth with his. Just then, almost at the thought, my lips tinge, the dying feeling spreading to my mouth and cheeks in a last effort to quench my calmness. Theo seems to take notice of my low whine of discomfort, because he cups my cheeks with his hands, drawing it back from his neck, itching that feeling in my cheeks without him even knowing. His eyes trace my face carefully.
"Where does it hurt now, Liam?" Theo murmurs, rubbing my tears away softly. I close my eyes and groan quietly, leaning my forehead against his, preparing myself for what I'm about to say next. I pry my eyes open despite myself, needing to see his reaction - half knowing it will affect my panic.
"My-lips."
Theo's eyes are the first hint. They don't go wide like I thought they would, wide with shock, and maybe anger - maybe something disgusted, planted by the universe if only to throw me off balance. No, instead their dark with intent, his eyelids slowly blinking, lashes dancing on his skin. He grins softly, tilting our heads together so our lips brush. the warm and sudden sensation scare my eyes open from where they had started to close traitorously, stealing the breath from my aching chest with a gasp, my senses screaming for Theo - everything I have, like always, screaming for Theo.
"Been waiting to do this, darling," he states, ever-confidant before he finally fucking seals the deal, mouth gently wrapping around mine. My stomach sparks, a small pit igniting itself deep in my gut. I ignore it, focusing only on the fact that I'm kissing Theo. Fuck, I'm kissing Theo. I smile softly, letting him taste my joy. I also focus on the words he uttered before kissing me - which might be my favourite thing now - allowing my brain to mull it over. He's been waiting for this. Just like me. Maybe he's been wanting to kiss me senseless for as long as I have. Maybe he's been waiting for this since before me. Maybe he's seen the way I've looked at him, and finally, after forever, he's wanted something for himself, not anyone else. Not to please anyone else.
Its not until he moves his head to the side to deepen the kiss do I moan, elbows resting on his shoulder with my fingers braided in his hair. He grunts into my mouth, the vibration sending waves of shock down my spine, shivering again despite the warm summer night - and the warmth of an embrace I find myself wrapped up in.
"Fuck, Theo. I've been waiting for this too," I gasp when we part for air, a small line of spit connecting our lips, his beautiful mouth looking tragically red and puffy, begging for me to lean in and kiss him again. So I do, without remorse I bring his face closer to mine before closing the gap. I can tell he's shocked by my forwardness, but he quickly gets over it, savouring the feeling of my mouth on his. This time, when we stop our glorious kissing -as if someone could possibly live without such a thing- he draws me close, scenting my neck and placing the most delicate of kisses in my hair, showering me with affection and care, caressing my back slowly.
Theo grips my hips slightly, moving them to hold my ass tightly whilst he stands up, bringing the both of us over to my bed, reclining himself on the back of my bed, pushing his legs out straight in front of him, pulling me down and pushing me down him until my chest rests on his stomach, my face buried in his chest, or, rather his pecs, because of course he works out and looks like a god. His skin is warm against my cheek, light hairs tickling my nose. I huff out a small giggle, with my lips pressed up against his chest like they should have been a long time ago, the feeling sending the familiar sensation of drowsiness deep into my bones.
"This good, darling?" Theo murmurs, one hand scratching at my scalp slowly, the delicious back-and-forth movement sending trace amounts of ecstasy into my head, practically straight to my brain. I nod slowly, pushing my chin into his chest so I can look up at him, eyes running along his face, admiring his features before fully stopping on his eyes, green orbs piercing into my soul. If I though he was pretty before, he's damn-well fucking beautiful now.
As if he can read my thoughts, he smirks ever-so slightly, his eyebrows quirking up in such a way that I can't help but feel attracted to him - even more than before. Our proximity is something that I'm not used to, the closeness of our faces has my mouth throbbing again, for no real reason other than the fact that Theo's isn't on it. They feel light, the absence of pressure messes with my head, the room spinning once more, forcing me to bury my head into the soft skin just below his neck.
"What is it, darling? You hurting again...? Show me where," he murmurs quietly, sending graceful shivers down my spine in a hurry - like a bunch of rude, impatient gazelles.
"Fuck, my mouth, again." I groan out, the light from the bedside table burning the corner of my eyes. Theo hums sympathetically while stroking the hair from my face, hands gripping my hips to drag me up to him, cupping my face for the second time with gentle hands.
Slowly leaning up, he searches my eyes for any signs that I want him to stop. I bite my lip, the friction releasing some of the agony. Theo finally joins our lips, kissing me again. I sigh softly into his mouth, his wet, warm lips drinking the sound straight from my throat. I scratch at my throat lightly, hoping he’ll catch the hint.
He does, partings for breath. He waits a second, panting in my face with our mouths barely touching, the feeling more than I’ve ever felt before. That is, until he looks at me slyly, carefully gripping my jaw, nosing down my neck until he reaches my collarbone, gently kissing it, and innocently adorable smile plastered on his face. I can’t help the beat my heart skips, forgotten just like anxiety pulsing through my veins. But all feather light marshmallow feelings leave my mind when Theo decides it’s time to kiss up my neck, mouthing at all the right spots. Tenderly sucking under my jaw, his tongue tracing my pulse point without direction - only feeling. Feeling, I muse. I can get around that.
Theo pauses his glorious actions, grinning slightly when I groan at losing of his hot, sinful tongue on my aching skin. He smiles into my hair, hugging his arms around my neck and gently swaying us from side to side. It’s stupid how much I relish in this moment, his attention doing wonderful things for my - well, everything, really.
I hum softly, slowly coming to terms with what happened, and the fact that this beautiful boy can somehow calm my pulse down and silence the screaming in my head, while seconds later undo it in the most gloriously painful way with simply a look and a feather light touch. It’s so strange, this boy - man, would be more fitting - that has entered my life in the most gorgeous and colourful way possible, leaving me breathless in awe and anticipation.
I don’t feel pressured to do anything, simply allowing myself to lay here basking in Theo’s warmth and attention, which I seem to be raving about all the damn time tonight. But I can’t help it. Nobody’s ever paid too much attention to me, it seems. Mason and Corey do, but never for as long as I need. They always find ways to drift back to each other, leaving me in the dust like a lost, sad puppy.
My parents always have their shit to work out, whether it’s for the hospital, themselves, each other, or the fucking mayor or some shit. I don’t know but whichever one it is, it’s rarely me. So the fact that Theo does these things strikes a chord of butterflies in my stomach fluttering wildly without abandon.
He reaches over to the side, hand grabbing the remote so he can turn on Brooklyn 99. After flicking it on, he drops it down on the bed so he can continue to stroke my back, his eyes flickering between the TV and me.
“Just rest, darling,” he breathes softly in my ear, sending one last shiver down my bare spine, exposed by the fact that my shirt is missing, the cool night air blowing taunting wisps of air across my skin. I reach behind me, awkwardly pulling up the blanket, sighing peacefully when it starts to warm up my back, the thick duvet swallowing the majority of my body into it’s beautifully humid grasp. I allow my pinkie to trace along Theo’s body, wandering around his soft skin without direction, exploring his body in an innocent way.
The moon shines slowly through the curtain, complimenting Theo’s skin gorgeously, the white beams of light bouncing around his hair when it shifts from his talking. Theo’s mumbling on about what’s happening in the show every minute or two, the quiet rumbling in his chest sending me into the sneaky set of slumber, my previous panic attack having sucked all of my energy out, opting for leaving me in its wake - tired and brain dead.
I comply with what Theo’s telling me I should do, my hand reaching for his before the exhaustion takes me in it’s harsh grip, my heavy eyelids closing finally. The last thing I hear before I fall fast asleep is Theo, his gentle “That’s it, darling. I’ll be here in the morning” making me smile softly.