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"So, uh, Mom," Chris Kent mumbles awkwardly, looking at the little kid in front of him. "Is there something you're not telling me?"
"Yeah, Mom," the little kids says. "Why do you and Dad have another kid I just found out about?"
"Look, this is all very complicated and I'd rather have your father here to help explain it-"
"Clark here to explain wah-?"
Chris glances over to look at his partner, Conner Kent, AKA Kon-El, AKA Superman (it's complicated), who just ran into his parent's apartment and started making himself at home. "Have you guys gone grocery shopping since getting back from the other universe? I'm starving."
"Mom, who's that?" The little kid asks, pointing to the superhuman raiding the kitchen. He only finds a bag of year old chips and - ew - decides those are good enough. "Why does he look like Dad?"
Conner turns to the new voice, now noticing someone new in the apartment. "Who's that?"
"Conner, this is Jon. We had him in the other universe. It's been ten years there, though it looks like it's been a shorter time here…"
"Oh, hi," Conner awkwardly responds through a mouth of chips. He holds out the bag to the kid (Jon). "Tostidos?"
"Jon, don't eat those," Lois tells her son, apparently, swatting the bag away.
"I look like your dad cause I'm cloned from him. Well, mostly. It's complicated," Instead of explaining, Conner throws more chips into his mouth.
"Okay, so I was able to close the portal now-" Clark runs into the room and stops upon seeing Chris and Conner there as well. "Chris! You're here!"
"Yeah…" Chris responds. "Where else would I be?"
"I don't know, somewhere I could take more time to explain this to you," Clark mutters quickly before turning to the young adult eating tortilla chips on his couch. "And you're here - Conner, what are you wearing?"
Conner smiles, stands up and places his hands on his hips "Nice, isn't it? I call it the Superman 2.0. It's everything good about the old superman outfit, and nothing dorky."
"There's no red pants!"
"Exactly."
"And you replaced all the yellow with black!"
"Uh huh."
"And - hang on, why did you say Superman 2.0?"
"Because Metropolis needs a Superman and you were busy having secret children," Conner snaps. "Now that you're back, though, don't think you get your job back. I promoted Chris to Superboy, and since he's not giving that up and I need to be called something….yeah."
"Can we go back to the secret kid thing?" Chris interrupts.
"Yeah, you never told me you had another son!" Jon berates, turning to his parents. "I had a brother this entire time and you didn't tell me!"
"Okay, in our defense, we never thought we would see Chris again," Lois tries to explain, before Chris cuts her off.
"Yeah, get a real son and forget about the one you adopted all of a sudden."
"Oh my god, no, all of you shut up," Superman moans, shoving his head into his hands. "Chris, don't say stuff like that. Jon, I'm sorry we told you another lie-"
"Oh my god this kid is more screwed than me," Conner whispers.
"And why did you not tell me you had a cool clone! That's awesome!"
"I know, right Jon? I am awesome! Hey, lemme ask your dad if Chris and I can take you out to fight LexBots; you look like you're good in a fight."
"Really!?" Jon yells excitedly.
"NO!" Clark and Lois yell at the same time.
"He's not good in a fight and you can't let him fight LexBots with you," Clark snaps.
"Hey, who said I'm not good in a fight? You lied to me about your son, your secret clone and your secret powers, and now you don't believe in my dreams? Some dad you are."
"Sweetie, we're sorry about the elaborate lies we told you, but that doesn't mean you can fight LexBots! It's a school night!" Lois pleads. "Now, why not we all go and meet your grandmother? She's good at ironing everything over."
"I THOUGHT MY GRANDPARENTS ALL DIED TRAGICALLY!"
"Five out of six did," Clark tells his angry child, patting him on the shoulder. "See? We mostly told you the truth that time! Let me call my mom to tell her we're coming; Conner, take that….thing off and put some normal clothes on."
"Welcome home, kid," Chris shrugs, pulling his new secret brother into a hug. "It only gets more complicated from here."