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Ursa is the better parent to Zuko, who she emphasizes with and genuinely loves.
But it can’t be forgotten that despite knowing his father doesn’t like him, she intentionally wrote a letter claiming Zuko was an illegitimate commoner KNOWING Ozai would read that.
This set Zuko up for further parental abuse at Ozai’s hands.
That letter was an act of treason. She’s not only in a precarious situation with a husband who has absolute authority over her.
She’s in a precarious position with Fire Lord Azulon who she should’ve learned from joining the family, cared nothing for his second son and that son’s branch of the family.
That letter could have set all four of them up for execution, as there’s no way Azulon would have let common blood bastards be spares to his favorite son’s throne.
Ursa couldn’t understand Azula.
But don’t forget that scene in the show where mother and sweetheart son laugh alongside Azula at Iroh’s intention to burn Ba Sing Se to the ground.
My son is so precious, but my baby daughter is strong enough to handle the unloving Ozai all on her own.
She was completely emotionally neglectful of Azula before she got Zuko into trouble with Ozai, and her neglect got even worse when she had to dedicate herself to Zuko because of her own stupidity.
And while the fandom gives Ursa the benefit of the doubt, there’s nothing in canon to really sympathize her.
When she saves Zuko from execution, she doesn’t say goodbye to Azula.
And then decides that life would be easier if she had her memory erased.
Ursa was a woman forced into a marriage she didn’t want, but she was also a very stupid and selfish woman. Zuko had her unconditional love.
Prince Iroh before his son was born and before his son died, lived as the blissfully innocent favorite son of the Fire Lord.
Despite recognizing his brother as a man without love, before Zuko got burned, he never interfered in Ozai’s parenting, and completely wrote Azula off before she even attempts to capture Zuko on Ozai’s orders.
He never once gives Azula the grace he does Zuko.
Let’s not forget that the Dragon of the West committed atrocities, and only changed because HIS son was killed.
Zuko is introduced accosting the Southern Water Tribe that only consists of women and children. Iroh doesn’t admonish Zuko.
Zuko burns Kyoshi Island, Iroh doesn’t admonish him.
Azula wasn’t irredeemable. Her conquest of Ba Sing Se was bloodless.
And while the heroes wanted to remain morally superior, it would’ve been more merciful to give her a swift execution.