Archive of Our Own ^beta

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“Do you ever get the feeling that we're being replaced…?” Haru remarks with a soft chuckle.

“What?” Grace hurriedly looks over at him and presses her eyebrows together in amusement, “stop it, we are not… they're just… well…”

Grace trails off as she returns her attention to you and Logan across the street at Tailor Made. Failing to use her usual, effortless wit to come up with a defense for your recent behavior, she whimpers to reluctantly signal her defeat. Haru grins and quickly scrambles to hold his tongue when she glances towards him out of the corner of her eye with a teasing, murderous expression and heavily plops her chin into the palm of her hand.

Observing both of you again for a short moment, Grace smirks and shakes her head scoldingly at how attentively Logan is watching you talk to Vivi, “Peach, he's got it bad…”

Haru whirls to look at her and laughs, “him?!”

“Uh, yeah!”

“Grace… have you not seen the way she looks at him?” 

“Oh, of course I have…” she waves her hand to hush him, “I'm not blind.”

He rolls his eyes and sneers at her, “no, but they might be.”

They burst out into hearty laughter and hastily sit up in their seats, eager to continue their faithful efforts of keeping a close eye on the two of you from the patio set at the Blue Moon. Though this isn't out of character for the relentless duo, they for once have an actual, justifiable reason behind their fevered commentary, though everything isn’t as simple as it seems. 

Taking a step back, it's been a chaotic week.

Almost immediately after everyone breathed a warranted sigh of relief with Pen, Miguel, and Yan behind bars, the next wave of unfortunate events hit. Learning that Duvos would be invading meant that you jumped right back into action and didn’t stop. The haphazard preparations you governed alongside Mi-an and the Civil Corps appeared to be enough to thwart the looming attack, but only just. Confident that you’d emerge victorious when the day came, Matilda’s heinous betrayal and subsequent Duvos occupation of Sandrock meant that the town’s morale reached an all-time low. The resentment you felt when Matilda struck you down paled in comparison to what you harbored during your forced servitude. You used every opportunity you had to retaliate against the Duvos soldiers that you’d encounter as you were escorted from place to place, making it abundantly clear in a continual act of rebellion that you would never yield to their heedless demands.

Words cannot describe the happiness you each felt when you reunited with Logan. It only took a matter of hours for him to put together a plan once he realized that something was wrong and saw that you needed a lifeline. He carefully monitored the routine that they had you in before he acted, electing to enlist Ged’s help in order to personally get to you. Knowing that his decision to rescue you was highly strategic, it took little convincing to understand that his furious reaction to Stev’s presence wasn’t. You practically had to beg him to let Stev go when his anger boiled to the surface because of how they’ve been treating you, explaining that he was the only one of them worthy of reprieve. Adamantly refocusing Logan on the diversion that you’d come up with before he managed to blow both of your covers, you made swift work of freeing your closest companions and triumphantly drove out the Duvos forces together.

You became inseparable after that. Having been thrown into the spotlight given your vital roles in turning the tide, it became clear that your poorly obscured, budding romance was no longer private knowledge to just Haru and Grace. It didn't take long at all for you two to catch on to the elated whispers and lingering stares, but what they haven’t realized is that you’ve already reached the same conclusion yourselves. Understanding that you've developed feelings for each other at an alarmingly fast rate, you both made an unavowed promise to stave off your desires to explore where things could go until Sandrock was safe and as a result, you've found yourselves playing a sort of game, one guided by your shared, anxious stubbornness to avoid confessing your recently perceived affections.

It's addicting, pretending like the rest of the world doesn't exist. The electric spark the two of you felt when you first met has served as the catalyst for this new phase of odd, rushed courtship that you've entered. Resulting from the prying eyes of your friends and neighbors, as it's been since the beginning, you sought out the privacy to spend time together without judgement or interruption. Though lately the tumultuous, war-ridden events have taken up the majority of that time, you've still managed to create extenuating circumstances to bypass the pressures of upholding appearances for everyone around you during the day to foster sanctuary for yourselves after nightfall. You gently push the ill-defined boundaries of those sentiments exclusively when you're alone, understanding that for now, neither of you will question those hidden actions severely enough to provide the other with an answer.

That tradition held true two nights ago, the evening after you had successfully freed Sandrock from the Duvos regency. While most were busy celebrating, the last anyone saw of their favorite smitten pair was the two of you leisurely wandering down the train tracks together towards the Bend. Not meaning to have walked as far as you did when you set out, you ultimately agreed to trek to the top of Mt. Rocksand to enjoy the perfect vantage point of the city. Shrouded in the darkness of a moonless night as you sat on the overlook, the dialogue lulled into what you assumed was a comfortable silence. You sneakily glanced in Logan's direction after a short while, hoping to appreciate his company as much as the view, only to find him in pieces. In a matter of seconds, you frantically wrapped as much of him as you possibly could into a hug as the tears began to flow and his hardened exterior shattered. 

Logan’s days in isolation at the hideout took their toll on his unabated mind. While he was restlessly waiting to hear the ruling that would decide his fate, the weight of the burden he's been carrying, the weight of his past, had finally caught up to him and cruelly intertwined itself in the upheaval of emotions that he felt when he saw the Duvos airship earlier that morning, opening the door for all of his repressed memories and anxieties to come flooding back. There has never been a good time since he's returned to Sandrock to feel this vulnerable, the walls he's tactfully learned to build haven't allowed him to seek the imperative closure until now. The “trial by fire” mentality you share means that you've both been equally quick to ensure that the other didn’t get too lost in the trenches and as that intimate loyalty grew, you began to understand that Logan's heavy heart and mind didn’t need saving, they just needed a soft place to land. That night confirmed the notion as he bared his soul to you and while he cried, you were helpless to join him.

When it was all said and done, in asking what he’d like to do as you lovingly wiped his tear stained cheeks, Logan quietly remarked that he didn’t want to leave, so the two of you retreated from the ledge to spend the night beneath the massive, barren tree that has tirelessly kept watch over Sandrock for centuries. Intentionally seeking shelter in the subaerial roots, graciously, the Eufaula’s typically brutal, evening winter wind didn’t make its usual appearance. The warmth of the campfire you built held its place in your seclusion, but it wasn’t nearly as comforting as his embrace. Logan had pulled you into his arms and laid you down on his chest once you returned to him, cradling you while his mind wandered. Appreciative of the company and the quiet place to think, you had unknowingly gifted him with a blank slate and you both stayed up for hours after you got comfortable, the conversation turning to that of the future as you found yourselves independently realizing that the only one you could picture was with each other. Eventually, when the gentle drumming of his heartbeat became a siren song, you fell asleep on his chest in his arms and Logan wholeheartedly wondered if he'd ever find such peace again. 

Once the sun rose, you were different people. Without allowing him the option of saying no, you made your way back down the mountain and directly to your workshop in the morning. Though your persuasion tactic was the promise of breakfast and questionless respite, in truth, Logan refused to part from you and agreed to your considerate offer for that reason alone. After ushering him inside, you encouraged him to relax while you got your machines up and running for the day. In the midst of eating breakfast, people began showing up to check on you or to ask where Logan was after not having seen either of you since the night before. Your adamant denial that you didn’t know what happened to him only fueled the intruding rumors, but neither of you cared. Word quickly spread and the true test was when Grace and Haru knocked on your door that afternoon. Unwilling to believe for a second that he wasn’t there with you, they casually let themselves in and outright began searching for him when you dared them to try out of spite. Failing to locate him, they begrudgingly left and declared that they’d be back that night for your previously planned dinner. Sincerely confused as to where he disappeared to, you conducted your own hunt and found Logan hiding in your library nook upstairs. Giddily claiming that he barely managed to slip behind a bookcase before the three of you walked into the room, the sound of your ensuing, raucous laughter could’ve been heard through the walls and should’ve given your little ruse away. 

Bringing things to yesterday evening, the gang arrived for dinner as promised. You had spent the entire day with Logan and despite their suspicions, no one was the wiser. As far as they knew, Logan showed up just before they did and your decision to make that falsification clear cemented the secrecy of the confiding night that you shared together. Though you still received a substantial amount of pestering, you found yourselves for the very first time unphased by it. Knowing that he hides his contentment around you well, you’re keen to maintain that image for him, deciding that it is yet another secret layer to your increasingly complicated friendship, something that you find undeniably special.

Heidi had stopped by at one point to deliver the finalized blueprints for Daisy’s basket and you temporarily left your friends to their own devices to begin manufacturing the necessary materials. After realizing what you were up to, the group unanimously agreed to stay at your place to help; however, one by one they fell away until it was just you and Logan, the two of you equally determined to complete this meager task so that you could finish what you started, what you were itching to return to. In some ways, you've both been inconsolable since the invasion of Sandrock, the responsibility to protect everyone around you has bound you together and seized control of your every thought. As for what happened to your companions, Haru went to take Andy upstairs, but was effectively forced to retire after Andy became upset that he couldn’t be up late with everyone else. Grace, being the good best friend that she is, lied and said that she had some final preparations to make herself, but you know that she excused herself to leave you alone with him, which you didn’t complain about in the slightest. 

Returning to the present, across the street from Grace and Haru, you and Logan are dropping off the clothes you fashioned for Vivi ages ago, the very same ones that you let Logan borrow his first night back in town when he stayed with you.

“I’m so sorry that I’ve been holding onto these, Vivi… please forgive me. I hope I haven’t set you too far back…” you frown guiltily as you hand them over, “we haven’t had a chance to stop and we’re about to–…” slowly glancing behind you when you hear a large yawn, you smirk and playfully narrow your eyes at the source of the interruption as he sits down on the steps with a dull groan, “I guess I should ask you to forgive him too… Logan was kind enough to stay up with me all night to finish that basket for Daisy. I just wanted to tell you that we’re leaving shortly. Would you mind keeping an eye on Andy while we’re gone? Haru will have his hands tied if anything happens here.” 

Busily inspecting your workmanship as you speak to her, Vivi smiles and looks down her glasses at an sheepishly apologetic Logan once you finish. You turn to follow her gaze and gently scold him with a grin, “hm… and speaking of Andy, you sound just like him, yakboy. Are you always this fussy when you’re tired…?” 

Logan briefly lifts his hat to comb a hand through his hair and chuckles, “no, but I’d like to know where you get the energy, Builder…” 

Making quick work of your retort, you laugh a little, “apparently you monster hunter, bandit types can’t keep up. I’d never give up my secret… it seems you’re not worthy. Not yet.” 

Giving the two of you a knowing look, Vivi smirks and motions for you to follow her, “child, why don’t you come with me for a minute? Grandma has somethin’ to give you before you go. Need to make sure you’re safe on this mission of yours.” 

Looking at her curiously, you nod and head inside. Logan takes the opportunity to figure out where Grace and Haru ran off to and he quickly spots them enthusiastically waving him down with absurd grins on their faces. He laughs and shakes his head, muttering something to himself about them going insane as he leans his back against the wooden post to close his eyes for a moment until you return. 

Earning her unofficial “matchmaker” title for a reason, though she doesn’t often have an opportunity to use her expertise, Vivi subtly panders for information in the hopes of confirming her suspicions, “I think it was real nice of Logan to help you out with that basket. Ever since he was a youngin’, he was always the first to step up, just like his Pa. You remind me of him in that way. There is something different about that boy though, I can’t quite put my finger on it. I suppose two years on the run changes a person. You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that, would you, dear?” 

Realizing where she’s going with this and that it’s why she pulled you aside, you smirk and shake your head as you pretend to be oblivious to her impressive conversational groundwork, “no, I… I couldn’t say. I really haven’t known him very long, but…” you gaze at him through the window and your voice unintentionally softens, “I suppose, from what I’ve heard, he… he is different. It doesn’t seem like it’s a bad thing, though...” you suddenly grin and chuckle a little, “he’s absurdly protective and just as stubborn as me, I’m finding out. We… we just want to make sure everyone’s safe. I’m looking forward to getting to know him better once this is all over.”

When you take your time turning back towards her, she smiles and decides to drop the act knowing that you’re intentionally obscuring the truth, “hon, don’t you start lying to your Grandma… it sure seems like you’re gettin’ on pretty well to me. What about when you shared that hug once y'all got them boys in handcuffs for stirrin’ up so much trouble? Most folks probably didn't notice, but I've never seen you look so happy. I may be old, but that smile on your face can't have been just because you'd finished savin' the day again.” 

Blushing at the warm memory as you avert your eyes, you shrug and stare at her dining room table, “awe c’mon, Vivi… not you too. Look, we’re… we're just good friends and that’s it, okay? I… I'm sorry, you're right… we are close, but it… it doesn’t mean anything other than we can rely on each other to get through this mess. When Duvos leaves and life slows down, then maybe we'll revisit this again, but for now we… we really should be going… the longer we wait the more time they have to come back.”

Conceding to your request, she nods and begins gathering some items for you, “alright, alright… but let me at the very least give you a piece of advice. Take it from someone who has been around a little while and had this passed down to me when I was your age. It may not make sense now, but someday it will: life doesn't wait on you, so don't wait on life to tell you what to do with yours.” 

Pensively digesting her rather cryptic message, you glance at Logan once more as she fluidly changes the topic, hoping that the sight of him will help you interpret the meaning. Instead of receiving some highly sought after clarity, your distracted mind can't help but wander to last night. 

You and Logan are in the throes of working on building the basket for Daisy. Having moved your worktable to be closer to your assembly station, you conjunctively decided to move your firepit as well so that the two of you weren’t entirely out in the cold. Busily bouncing back and forth between your machines and your makeshift base of operations, you’ve found yourself utterly impressed by Logan’s diligent assistance. Throughout the evening, a hidden talent of his that you discovered was how well he could sew. Knowing that he wouldn’t be much help with constructing the frame when you reached that threshold, he offered to craft the door by hand to allow you to focus on completing additional tasks.

Doing your part in supplying the necessary materials, you bring him another finished piece of hardened leather from your tailoring machine. Admiring his handiwork as you lean over his shoulder after giving it to him, pressing your torso against his back, you giggle when he fusses at you for interrupting and shoos you away with a hearty chuckle. 

“Logan, seriously… you should go inside and get some rest. Neither of us know what we're going to be up against and I’ll have this done in the morning. Take it while you can, we can still set off first thing even if it takes me all night.”

He smirks and shakes his head as he throws another stitch, beginning to work on one of the other seams, “as kind as that is, I ain't goin’ anywhere… it's not fair you gotta finish this by yourself, a-an’ plus, I can't imagine I'd get to sleep anyway. I'm too restless to see what they're hidin’... we were waitin’ on the blueprint, so now I'm jus’ happy to do whatever I can to help out to get us up there faster.”

Exhaling softly to yourself at his adamancy, you smile widely and stifle a yawn, “alright, fine. I guess I’ll go put the coffee on…” 

Little by little you start to see that you're actually making progress as the two of you continue to work tirelessly into the early morning hours. Aside from the winter temperature’s sting, your aptitude to be freezing from exhaustion predictably reared its ugly head sometime after midnight. Without even needing to ask him to, Logan put another few logs on the fire and as he returned to his seat beside you, he dotingly removed his cape to drape it over your shoulders. Allowing your eyes to follow his movements, you smirk softly at his kindness and ready yourself to thank him, but quickly understand that he didn’t give any of it a second thought. Permitting your gaze to linger, you casually adjust the lamp on the workstation, pretending that you need more light, and are easily drawn in by his unyielding concentration. Finding yourself smiling ear to ear when you realize that he has no idea you’re watching him, you subtly fasten his cape around your neck to keep it there and amorously rest your cheek in your hand to admire every inch of him for quite some time. 

After you finished the basket, you headed inside to warm up and relax. Armed with yakmel milk bottles instead of cups of coffee to celebrate, you made a pact to stay downstairs and awake for just a bit longer before you tried to get some sleep. Banking on Grace’s arrival to serve as an alarm clock, just in case, you curled up together on your couch and readily savored the quiet, reposeful morning. 

Logan glances past you and smirks to himself when he realizes just how long you've apparently been wrapped up in conversation, the two of you quite distracted by running through scenarios of what you might encounter at the Northern Plateau, “look, sun's comin’ up…” he sighs defeatedly and slowly begins to stand, “there ain’t no way I’m gettin’ to sleep now, even if I wanted to… might as well wait out them last few hours ‘fore Grace shows up… you should get comfortable, I'll… I'll go get another cup to keep me company... no sense in you stayin’ awake with me. I’m surprised you’ve made it this long.” 

Curiously following his gaze, you find yourself briefly drawn to the beautiful glow of the sunrise cresting over the horizon. Suddenly getting an idea when you hear him pick up his mug from the table, you turn back towards him and respond in a hushed, gentle tone, “I… I think I might know a way to rid you of this pesky sunlight allergy…” 

He chuckles a little and scrunches his eyebrows together in confusion, “oh, yeah? An’ how do you suppose you're gonna do that?” 

Apprehensively licking your bottom lip, you inhale shakily and carefully take his hand to make him sit down beside you again. 

“What're you doin’…?” 

Reinstating the silence simply by shaking your head, you devotedly trace over his features as you release his hand to remove his hat, doing your best to ignore his increasingly bewildered expression. Sinking a bit deeper into the cushions, you stretch your legs out onto the coffee table and grab one of the throw pillows to place it in your lap. 

“Lay down…” you whisper with affectionate, pleading eyes. 

Logan's nerves shoot through the roof when he understands what you're planning to do. Exhaling softly to calm himself, he nods shyly and does what he's told without protest. 

Welcoming him into your lap with a small, comforting smile, you rest one of your hands in the center of his chest and rub it lightly. To your surprise, he bends one of his arms upwards and covers your hand with his. Unsure what to do with this new predicament as you fondly lace your fingers together, he sits very still and stares out the brightening window. Sensing his anxieties, you smile a bit wider and lean over to grab his hat with your free hand, “here, how about this? Might as well since I already have your cape.” 

He watches as you lift his hat to your face to cover it and nestle yourself further into the cushions in the hopes of eliminating the intimidating component of your situation. From the lower angle, he notices your eyes close and chuckles a little as he tries to break the underlying tension himself, “you're dedicated to stealin’ my look today, aren't ya?”  

Unable to stifle your grin, you giggle quietly and hush him as you subconsciously tighten your grip on his hand, “I am, but I think we can both agree that they look better on me.” 

“Well, if you’re gonna do it, you better do it right… hold on…” he sits up slightly to cover your torso with his cape so that it acts like a blanket. Lingering to admire the sight of you once he finishes, he murmurs softly after a short pause, “there… perfect.” 

Though you can't see him, by feeling alone he's far too close to you for your mind to function. Grateful that his hat is preventing him from seeing your blush, you craftily pop the collar to ensure that he doesn't and whisper, “no… now it's perfect.” 

Exhaling exasperatedly at your teasing and himself for being so captivated by you wearing his signature articles of clothing, he chuckles heartily and lays back down in your lap. You put a hand on his forehead to fiddle with the pieces of his hair that aren't tied and crack a joke to disguise the fact that he just reduced you to a puddle, “if I manage to fall asleep doing this, you deserve that cup of coffee. I’ll even fetch it for you myself.”

Unsatisfied with your current access when the levity between you wanes, you coax him to lift his head after a moment and undo his hair tie, habitually sliding it onto your wrist. Raking your fingers through his freed hair and down through the ends, you gradually start to relax as he does and you lull yourselves into a period of easy serenity. 

Realizing that he's dropping his guard more than he expected to, he anxiously pipes up, “hit me if I start snorin’, you don't need that racket.”

Opening your eyes to look at him curiously, you smirk and scrunch your eyebrows together at his random statement, “soooo does that mean you admit you're going to lose this little wager of mine? Huh, that was easier than I thought…”

He quickly blushes and shrugs uneasily as he lets go of your hand to fold his across his stomach, “mhm… I… I never said that.”

Chuckling at his pinkening cheeks, you take it up a notch and scoot down to bring him even closer to you, “well, it hasn't been a problem before… you quiet down eventually and truthfully, I'm just happy that you're getting some sleep. Really, I don't mind.”

“Alright…” he exhales deeply and tries to be quiet again, “good.”

The few seconds of silence that pass are more than he can handle and you can physically feel him tense up as he thinks of something else to say.

“Y-you sure you're comfortable…?”

“Logan…?”

“Hm?” 

“Relax…” you scold and playfully clamp his mouth shut.

He smirks, nodding slightly as he murmurs into your hand, “right, sorry…”

When you resume your efforts, Logan allows his cheek to fall towards you to reap the unexpected reward of this exchange, which is that for once, he has uninterrupted permission to gaze up at you for as long as he'd like. Though the thought is terribly distracting, the smell of your perfume emanating off of your wrist as it passes by is intoxicating and ever so slowly, your persistent, will numbing movements start to win him over. Finding himself completely at your mercy, he momentarily goes cross-eyed as he surrenders to your touch and doesn't catch himself dozing until it's too late. 

After you feel his body slack, hoping that he won't notice you do so, you very carefully lift the brim of his hat upwards to peek at him and discover that his annoyingly acute vigilance still works even when he's half asleep. You grin guiltily and chuckle when he reaches up to swiftly tug it back down to cover your eyes. 

Rolling onto his side to cuddle up to you, he groans wearily and definitively breathes you in with a submissive whimper, “you're gonna be the death of me, woman…” 

Internally celebrating that you successfully soothed him into this extremely drowsy state, you tease him quietly and try your best to hide the elation in your voice because he finally gave in, “awe, now would that be so bad? I promise to make sure that it's quick and painless…”

Barely managing to mumble his reply despite his widening smile from your jesting, evidently only nominally aware of the sun's existence because it's outside of your arms, he yawns and curls a hand up to remove the pillow so his head is on your upper stomach instead, “I… I'm jus’... gonna take… five minutes… then… then you get me… n-nothin’ more…”  

Lazily shaking your head at him once you take the pillow away to use it for yourself, you firmly bite your lip to suppress your massive grin as you get comfortable knowing that you fully intend on being there a while, much longer than he requested, “mhm-hm… five minutes and nothing more."

“Alright, I got one for you…” Grace muses with a giggle after letting her hand fall from waving at Logan, “do you honestly think that they'll be able to survive today? I mean, just… just look at him, Haru… he’s sitting there waiting for her like a lost puppy. Did he forget that we’re imminently leaving to face off with an entire army…? Where did that bandit spirit he’s irritated me with all this time go, hm? Has she somehow zapped that out of him too?!”

Embracing his antithesis stance, Haru laughs while he calmly stretches his legs out to cross his ankles and sinks further into his chair, “you worry too much… per usual. They’ll be fine, they always deliver. Especially now, I don’t envy anyone that gets in his way of keeping her safe.” He shrugs and looks over at Grace, “and truthfully, I wish that I was going with you guys, but I'm happy that I can be useful here. This week taught us that it's better to have somebody stay behind just in case things go wrong. At least that seems sane, or relatively normal for people in the middle of preventing a war… take that as a consolation prize for the day, okay?”

Meeting Haru’s gaze, Grace scoffs and folds her arms, “pfft, normal… don't get me started on what is or isn’t normal anymore. I don't even know who she is lately… some great best friend I must be. What’s your excuse for your ride or die over there?” She jokingly grumbles and smirks, “I mean, I guess I do know that she'd probably jump him if no one was around…” suddenly, her expression changes into one of fleeting hysteria and she gasps, excitedly perching herself on the edge of her seat, “oh Light, that reminds me… how did I forget to tell you what happened this morning?!” 

Haru rolls his eyes and makes his voice lackluster to show how little the idea of something occurring between the two of you phases him, “here we go, what did I miss this time?”

“Hah, funny. You’re seriously going to regret saying that…” 

Not even remotely surprised that you managed to pull it off when she arrived in the morning, Grace spots your late night accomplishment on your assembly station and is genuinely thankful that you had Logan’s help to complete it. Smelling the coffee that you brewed as she opens your front door, she logically assumes that you’re up and begins talking as she walks in, “good job finishing… the… bas… ket…”

Gradually losing her train of thought as she pauses in your doorway, she smirks to herself at the scene before her.

This feels strangely familiar…

Both of you are fast asleep. Still devotedly wearing Logan’s hat and cape, you’ve nestled yourself deeply into the corner of the couch and are effectively laying flat with one hand on his upper back, the other supporting your head with your knuckles against your temple. Logan rolled partially onto his stomach and has migrated upwards so that he's now cozily laying on your chest. Zeroing in on a particular detail, Grace notices that she has him dead to rights clutching a rather interesting, elevated portion of your shirt. 

Oh my, well that isn't…

In an attempt to not wake you, she very quietly shuts the front door behind her, but winces as the two of you hastily sit up in a panic from hearing the latch click. Logan frantically uses his hand to push himself off of you and his eyes widen when he realizes where it was resting. Hurriedly scanning each other's faces for your respective reactions, you break first and giggle a little at how awkward things just became. Giving him a roguish glare as your cheeks flush a deep red, additionally discerning in the process that he’s too embarrassed to say a word, you decide to try to mitigate the damage that has already been done.

Holding his fretful gaze when you begin speaking, hoping to reassure him that you aren’t upset, if anything, you’re flattered, you gradually redirect your attention to her and giggle a bit harder when you see the giant smile plastered on her face, “Grace, I can explain…” 

She shakes her head scoldingly and chuckles, “I’m sure you can… would you care to?”

When you don’t defend yourselves fast enough, Grace swiftly takes a stab at him next, knowing that she clearly has no choice but to capitalize on his already weakened state, “oh and, uh… Logan, I think you might've lost a few things last night… don't worry though, you shouldn't have much trouble finding them… seems like they're in good… hands.” She taps her temple with her finger and chuckles again at you when you quickly remove his hat with a nervous smirk. Forgetting that you have his cape on as well, she rolls her eyes at your obliviousness and tugs at her shirt to remind you. You whine defeatedly under your breath as you unclasp it from around your neck, timidly placing both items on the armrest of the couch.  

Having successfully drummed up his interest in the exchange, Haru can't disguise the look of shock on his face as Grace fills him in. Unable to contain his newfound delight, he starts listing out his description on his fingers, “wait, wait, wait… so you’re telling me that she was wearing his cape, had his hat on, and according to you…” he tauntingly makes air quotes, “‘accidentally’ got to second base with her?” He shakes his head and chuckles distractedly, “nope, sorry… I don’t buy it.” 

Entertained by his fretful disposition, Grace just laughs and elects to let him continue to sort through what she’s said so far.

“C’mon, Grace…” he gestures across the street, “it’s Logan, he is not that smooth. There’s no way he just casually did that and lived to tell the tale, not with her.” His eyes widen and he chuckles even harder, “unless… she wanted him to…? Hm, maybe this is better than I thought.” 

Recognizing that she has him hooked, she giggles faintly and playfully reprimands him for interjecting, “while I’m very glad that you’re invested in this story time session after doubting me, would you hush and let me finish telling it?!”

Watching you undo what you so eagerly did when you were alone together, Logan fights a smile, but chooses to follow your lead and try his hand at defending you to ward her off. Though he doesn’t have remotely enough energy to deal with her, he mutters shyly with an exasperated sigh and momentarily buries his face in his hand, dragging his fingers down his cheek, “please, Grace… jus’... she was cold, alright…?”

Grace laughs softly and unyieldingly folds her arms, “boy is that excuse getting old… is that really all that you have to say for yourselves?”

Sensing that the rivalry between you and Grace is rapidly reaching a, to put it mildly, lively breaking point, Logan casually offers to go make coffee to leave you to it and remove himself from the equation altogether. When you both hurriedly shout “no” in unison, his eyes widen and he stares at the floor, quickly concluding that he should’ve known better by now than to get in the middle of it. 

Jumping in with a grin, Grace hastily cuts you off when you open your mouth to reply, “no, no. I'll go… it would be a shame to ruin whatever,” she references in between both of you with a wagging finger, “this is…” 

Groaning under your breath, you stand up and shoot her a firm look to knock it off, “no, I will. It won’t take me long.” Moving past her, you quietly warn her to “be nice” as you disappear into the kitchen.

Logan awkwardly pipes up in a feeble attempt at calming you after hearing the clear hint of frustration in your voice, “I'll… come help ya… in a… minute…”

“I’m sorry…” Haru remarks perplexedly, struggling to move on from the previous portion of the tale, “but we are talking about the same Logan, right…? No other white haired ex-bandit showed up in Sandrock since last night?” 

“That's exactly what I've been saying! I thought I didn’t recognize her lately, but him?! Haru, let’s be serious for a second. She's told you and I enough to fill in the gaps for us and herself, but he has had his lips sealed. You've failed to get anything out of him, multiple times now…” she giggles, staring Logan down with a triumphant grin, “but even if that whole thing was an accident, he can't hide from what they did next because it, my friend, was no accident...”

“There's more?!”

“There's more!! Now quit interrupting, it’s the best part!!!”

Grace starts to walk away to assuage you, but hesitates, wanting to see if she can uncover some elusive details of what transpired after she left that would've ended with you two being the way she found you. Hearing the mugs clinking in the distance, she sighs and thinks better of herself. 

You may mean a lot to him, but she was there for you first. 

“Y'know…” Grace says softly, her demeanor much more cordial than it has been, “I've never seen her this content… maybe I need to start blaming you for that, you seem to have that effect on her…” she smirks and shrugs, “you should stay put. I'm going to take over in there and don't worry, I already planned on sending her back in here to you.” 

He blushes faintly at Grace's words and doesn't look away from where you were even after she leaves, finding that he's only capable of providing a small, delayed nod in response. Now that he's alone, he reflectively stares at his hand, briefly amused by the whole ordeal, and fondly thinks to himself:

She seems to be havin’ that effect on me too…

Ignoring that he most certainly heard parts of your hushed, frivolous argument with Grace when she followed through with her intentions, you casually enter and plop down beside him on the couch as you prepare yourself to address the elephant in the room.

Logan chuckles and glares at you with a massive grin, grumbling through his clamped teeth, “well, I got a real good question for you, Builder… what ever happened to that five minutes we agreed on, hm…? We wouldn't be in this mess if you would've woken me up like you were supposed to…”

You erupt into a fit of nervous giggles when he finishes his lighthearted reprimanding and you bury your face in his shoulder, delivering an incredibly mousy reply, “uhh… well, I… I never promised… and I… it…” 

Chuckling harder at your pathetic stammering, he leans in close to make you sweat, “mhm-hm, I'm listenin’... all sounds like a bunch of excuses to me.”

Suddenly deciding to be brave, you lift your head to meet his scolding eyes and giggle even harder as you let your hastening, stronger voice illustrate just how unapologetic you actually are because you find the entire situation far too hilarious to care, “but, if you're keeping track, yakboy… it was at least ten!” 

“Oh, that's it!!”

Logan hastily snatches you up into his arms and you squeal as he yanks you to him, intentionally throwing his weight to fall on his back against the seat cushions of the couch. The two of you are laughing so hard that it catches Grace's attention in the kitchen and she worriedly peeks around the corner to see what's going on. Assuming that Haru came downstairs, she wants to fill him in on what she already saw; however, she’s wholly unprepared for what greets her this time. 

The way you landed means that you're completely on top of him and are only being held up by your hands at his either side from catching yourself. Once your laughter wanes, you glance down and exhale shakily after noticing the suggestive position that you've found yourselves in. Teetering dangerously above his lap in a half-hearted pushup position, you’re not quite sure how to remove yourself. 

Gradually sliding his hands off of your lower back to release you, he patiently waits to see what you'll do now that you're free.

Using the opportunity to test him yet again, just as you have been the last few days, you relax your body to meld with his and you playfully raise an eyebrow, propping yourself up on your elbows as your pelvis sinks into his. 

Briefly gazing up at you with stars in his eyes, he smirks at your bold move and turns his attention downwards to lazily admire the tempting view. He places his hands on your shoulders and affectionately runs them the length of your arms, illustrating that you have his permission to stay right where you are. 

Scoffing flusteredly under your breath as your cheeks marble into a deep crimson, you find yourself wholeheartedly intrigued by the idea of making him squirm as payback for what happened earlier. Pathetically trying to disguise your enraptured, anxious voice, knowing that you're automatically setting yourself up for failure by doing this, you lean farther forward to lay your body on his chest, “now you wouldn't dare do that again, would you, yakboy…?”

“I would.”

After realizing that he replied with zero hesitation, he gulps a little and averts his widened eyes from yours. Pausing to collect his thoughts, he furrows his eyebrows together and delicately traces a line down the center of your neck to your collarbone with his index finger, intentionally telling himself to refrain from migrating any further, “I, uh… I-I would… if… if you'd have me.”

Having to fight your body's desire to physically shudder at his touch, you wonder if he can feel just how hard your heart is pounding. Gambling with yourself that he can't, you bravely tilt your head to be mercilessly close to his face and smile when you think that he might explode. Letting your mischievous voice show that you're toying with him, you tuck some of your falling hair behind your ear, “what was it that you told me? Anything like that can wait until after the mission…?”  

Exhaling defeatedly wearing a criminally alluring, one-sided grin because you stopped your approach and called his bluff by using those old words against him, he trains his eyes on your lips and slowly props himself up on an elbow to meet you. As he moves, you giggle softly and lean backwards to tauntingly preserve the distance between you. He chuckles at your goading and longingly murmurs, “suppose I did say that…” 

“What a stupid thing to say…” you prod breathlessly as your smile disappears. Temporarily losing any and all of the rebellion that you've worked so hard to create, your subconscious finding itself more than ready to humor his implicit request, consequences be damned, you let yourself sink closer until your nose is just shy of touching his. 

Feverishly gripping the cushion for balance as he pushes himself upright in the hopes of successfully doing what both of your minds are outright begging you to do, he emits a soft, distressed groan when you seductively continue on with your arduous game of cat and mouse. Unable to retreat now that you're sitting flush in his lap on top of his thighs, he stretches as far upwards as you’ll allow and huskily whispers, “Light, you're trouble…” 

Eagerly using the marked comment as an excuse to regain your composure, you scoldingly shove him away from you with a small laugh. Promptly sliding off of his legs to be by his side on the couch, you shrug shyly and look down, “no… well, maybe. I… just…” you sigh dejectedly, “I'm really trying to distract myself from thinking too much about today and… you, uhm… you’re a… great distraction.” 

Your sudden mood change causes him to become quite concerned. He’s seen this timid look on your face far too many times to not anticipate the resulting fallout of its appearance. Observing you closely in the hopes of guessing what it is, he cautiously asks, “what's wrong?”

Keeping yourself guarded by staring at your hands, you reply nervously, “I'm… I'm honestly not ready for this… we've been so lucky and I… I can't help but think that something is going to happen. I mean, there's what… five of us going up there and an army of them?” You begin to ramble in a rush of panic at the scenarios running through your head, “Logan, you should know before we do this, I… I don't know what I'd do with myself if I lost you… I know that sounds ridiculous, but this has been–...”

Firmly shaking his head as you start to spiral, Logan hastily cups your cheek and forces you to look at him to bring you back.

You freeze.

Immediately fostering a quiet moment for you as he brushes his thumb through a beam of sunlight that's shimmering against your skin, he dotingly whispers, "none of that. I won’t hear it. We're gonna make it through this an’ whatever happens after don't matter right now, we'll deal with it then… like we always do.” He smiles reassuringly in an attempt to soothe you once more, “c'mon… it's you and me, remember?"

“Yeah,” you whisper entrancedly as you search the most inaccessible depths of his eyes and slowly become grounded again, “it's you and me.”

Noticing that you’re helping Logan up off of the steps, Grace watches as you say your goodbyes and she stands to meet you. Haru, entirely baffled by the conclusion of Grace’s recap with his jaw figuratively on the floor, doesn’t move a muscle. She giggles and consolingly pats his shoulder, “I told you you’d regret saying that…”

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

Chapter Text

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

You, Justice, and Logan are descending deeper into the Starship Abandoned Ruins on the elevator that is taking you who knows where and bringing you towards who knows what next. Thus far, things have been the standard sweep through seemingly endless corridors and enemies, but you’re all in agreement that it can only get more intense from here. For now, you’re each grateful for the small break this incredibly eerie ride is giving you. 

Justice shudders when the synthetic voice from overhead finishes its playback loop of instructions and remarks, “Old World elevators are kinda freaky…”

Logan smirks and raises an eyebrow at him teasingly, “you go in a lot of 'em?”

Rolling your eyes a little, you smile and shake your head scoldingly. The banter between the old friends hasn’t let up since you began working your way through the Duvos occupied maze this morning and it’s been an immense source of entertainment. 

The three of you settle into a brief period of silence, but remain on edge in spite of your attempts at using the confined space as reprieve. Suddenly, a strange sounding, confusingly proclaimed love song comes on through the speakers. Glancing bemusedly at Justice, you both shrug and ignore it; however, when Logan starts whistling along to the peculiar music, the two of you quickly turn towards him and chuckle to yourselves.

Clearly uneasy with your current situation, Justice casually slips in another comment, “that's a nice tune. You uh... whistle real well.”

Thinking that he would discreetly look at you as he replied because he was reminded of a particular memory, one that he is rather fond of, Logan clears his throat out of embarrassment when he's unexpectedly greeted with the huge grin that’s plastered across your face. He nods once and hastily shifts his gaze to the concrete wall in front of him as it passes by, “... thanks.”

Realizing that he had the same thought as you, you swiftly bite your lip and giggle, failing miserably to contain your reaction to his shyness. Inhaling deeply to force yourself to quiet down, you try to ignore your counterparts now ardently intrigued stares, “that’s it, I’m officially losing my mind….” helplessly giggling harder, you press your knuckles against your lips to soften the noise, “oh, m-maybe Vivi was right, we should’ve at least taken the morning to catch up on some sleep…” huffing to yourself as you lose your internal battle, you begin to laugh, “it… it’s just so funny… w-we… we’re in some hell hole of an elevator, at war with the Duvos army, and that’s what we’re talking about right now??”

Laughing a little from your infectious amusement, Logan furrows his eyebrows together at you, “so?”

You only manage to whistle a few notes of “your” song to tease him about your shared nostalgia before you and Logan start cracking up.

Watching the two of you exchange jovial sneers, Justice chuckles curtly and finds himself riddled with concern from not having understood the inside joke, “uhhhh… you sure it ain't me losin’ my mind? Did I miss somethin’?”

Playfully tapping him with your elbow as you walk forward, you absentmindedly destroy a laser on the wall, “ah, no… trust me, you aren’t, but we definitely are. I really needed that, Justice… thank you.”

The sounds of alarmed shouting shatters the tranquility and you each fretfully spin to locate the commotion as the elevator screeches to a halt. 

Justice looks at you apprehensively, “huh? What's goin' on? Why'd it stop?” 

“Don’t look at me, all I did was shoot another laser…!” 

“What the–?” Logan immediately returns fire as the source of the interruption comes into view and he moves to shield you, “fix the elevator. Leave ‘em soldiers to us!”

Wondering what’s going on, you peer past him and your eyes widen at the sight of a large procession of soldiers rushing onto the platform. You take off running into one of the adjacent rooms, desperately searching for anything that will help you restore power. Though you find what you need rather quickly, your scrap collection skills proving to be even more effective than you realize, by the time you emerge they have everything handled. Speedily making the necessary repairs with their assistance, you all continue on like nothing ever happened. 

After a few minutes, the elevator pipes up again and rambles about a bizarre sanitation protocol. Bumping onto an adjoining track, you’re compulsorily led down a new path and you hear Logan groan frustratedly as he dashes to the console. Assuming that he thinks you’re being diverted in the wrong direction, you join him as you frantically try to find a map or some sort of override. Logan bends down to look underneath the exterior and, as luck would have it, the ceiling opens up to allow more robotic assailants to drop onto the platform with a hard thud.

Standing up once he feels them land, Logan panics and whirls to look at you, “I didn't press nothin'!”

Laughing at the irony of something similar happening to him, you shake your head and rush over to aid Justice. For peace of mind, Logan checks a final time to ensure that he didn’t actually touch anything before he jumps into action as well. 

Thankfully, this portion of your increasingly harrowing tour of the ruins ends when the elevator lets you all off at the end of the track following one last wave of opponents. Caught off-guard by Logan's newly anxious voice once the elevator stops, you watch him dart to your right curiously, “he tagged here too! This mark!”

Sharing a wary look, you and Justice observe him uneasily while he inspects a red, hand-painted symbol on the wall. Justice follows him towards it and cautiously asks, “what're you talkin' about?”

“My Pa... he used this sign to mark for monsters.” Logan chuckles in disbelief, “he was here!”

Hearing him confirm your suspicions conjures a restless ache in your heart and the elation to Logan’s mood somehow sobers yours. As you stare at the sapling insignia, you start to feel a bit guilty for thinking more rationally on his behalf. You find it extremely odd that a monster hunter of Howlett’s caliber would’ve travelled this far into an Old World ruin, much less leave a mark behind claiming that he found a monster when all you’ve seen thus far have been humans and bots. Though you might not be the resident expert or his son, you have a hard time believing that a prized creature was the reason that he made this arduous journey.

Justice shakes his head, seeming to harbor the same sentiments, “Howlett... he came down here…?”

Inspired to press forward, Logan fleetingly glances at you before charging into the unexplored area, “he must have… keep an eye out, alright?” 

Worried that he would've noticed your apprehension, you’re grateful that Logan didn’t look you directly in the eyes just then. While Justice scrambles and tells Logan to wait up, you hang back pensively. This is the first time in a very long time that you want your intuition to be wrong. Pausing for a short moment to ingrain the image of the mark into your head, you look down sadly and slowly follow their path.

Moving through the latest section that you've found yourselves in, you work together as a team to fight the foes that you encounter and figure out the complicated, or rather easy at times, technology, all the while making note of any locations that Grace needs to be told about afterwards. Justice and Logan's dialogue ramps up once more and keeps things lighthearted, allowing you to happily take a back seat when you can to marvel at the various things you discover. This is paradise for you, though it's unfortunately the worst possible opportunity to enjoy it. 

When you run into yet another locked door, you poke around in drawers and through strewn, discarded files to hunt for clues while Justice and Logan deal with a pair of soldiers, hoping that they can miraculously convince them to grant you passage. Looking over your shoulder as they approach from the other room, you frown and assume that they didn’t have any luck either.

Logan waves a piece of paper in his hand and smirks, “well, I found the password on one of 'em…” you smile in relief and impatiently wait for him to tell you what it is, but quickly become confused by his deflated demeanor. He rubs his forehead and hands it to you, “‘Duvos.’ For the love of…”

Your smile immediately disappears and you shut your eyes with a hard sigh, “you can’t be serious… please tell me that you found an old log and wrote this on it to mess with me…” 

Patting your shoulder consolingly as the three of you walk over to the door, Logan chuckles and wishes that your comment was true, “mhm-hm… sorry, I didn't.” 

Justice groans a little and shrugs the ridiculousness of it off, “dang, talk ‘bout loyalty. Well, let's get that door open.”

Logan props his hip on the console beside you and crosses his arms as he takes one last, habitual glance at your surroundings before you move on. Out of the corner of your eye, you see his body tense and he stands up straight, “wait a minute... look down here!”

Rushing over to the windows to get a better look, you each ensure to maintain some level of cover so that you aren’t spotted. Justice raises his eyebrows and exclaims, “it's Pen!”

Wordlessly exchanging feelings of irritation amongst yourselves, you collectively procure a sense of dread from the notion of dealing with Pen again, understanding that he won’t be nearly as easy to deal with this time. 

“C’mon,” you urge quietly, trying desperately to distract yourself more than either of them as the fear that you felt this morning comes flooding into your mind, “I don’t care about him right now. Best case scenario, we avoid him altogether and get out of here. I’ll take point for a while, okay? It’s my turn, you both deserve a break. Let’s go.”

They nod in agreement and trail closely behind you as you finish entering the password and race through the door. After Logan realizes that they’re going to lift the engine, you navigate the sea of hallways as fast as you can until you abruptly skid to a stop and motion with your hand for them to halt. Craftily inching a bit farther forward, you kneel down to let Logan and Justice cram in next to you as you all eavesdrop on a speech being given by a Duvos Captain. Although you mostly feel resentment as you listen, you find humor in how scared they seem to be of the three of you and the idea that you’ve been deemed “elite Sandrock soldiers” gives you a strange sense of comfort. 

“Darn,” Justice whispers and rests his back against the wall, “the room's full of soldiers. Only three of us... ain't gonna be an easy fight. What should we do, maybe we should try scoutin’ ahead?”

Logan ardently shakes his head and shifts impatiently on his knee, “naw, forget that. Let's jus' go in full blast! C'mon, you know we got this!”

Truly appreciative of their willingness to have you make the final call, you smile timidly when they turn to you. After mulling it around, you sigh deeply and look at Logan apologetically, “hm… Justice is right, let's try and find another way. There's always another way… sorry, Logan.”

He shrugs and smirks at your misplaced apology, “you’re callin’ the shots, but if we run into more soldiers... you best get ready to fight, Builder.”

Grinning as you use his shoulders to stand up, you chuckle through your reply when he playfully loses balance and almost falls over, “oh, don’t you worry, yakboy… I’m more than ready. I’ve had it up to here with all those lasers today and I'd like to save a bullet or two if I can… forget the soldiers, did you get a load of how many there were in that room?” You offer him your hand to help him up and in the process, you unintentionally think back to how different Pen looked, how intimidating he seemed now that he’s free of the facade that he had to maintain, “and plus… we still have Pen to save our energy for and they just mentioned ‘Tiger’... that means Matilda is here too.”

Detecting a hint of trepidation in your voice, Logan surveys you attentively. Avoiding his prodding gaze, knowing that he picked up on the subtle, outward display of your internal monologue, you look at Justice instead as he references to a hallway in the distance, “maybe there's a way around over there. Let's take a look!” 

Nodding once in determination, you huff softly and steel your resolve, “nice spot, lead the way.” 

Justice laughs and gestures proudly to his discovery when you round the corner, “I told ya! Always some secret route.”

While you compliment him for his panned out suggestion, the doors you just walked through slam shut and your eyes dart around nervously. The lights in the corridor dim and are replaced by a flurry of glowing lasers undulating in continually changing patterns. When you see that this current challenge doesn’t appear as though it will subside any time soon, you whimper a little and mumble regretfully, “me and my big mouth…” 

The three of you dance around each other as the multiplying lasers continue to diminish the space that you have to move. You’re up front, working your way towards the opposite door to try and get it open, Logan is weathering the middle ground, and Justice is in the rear. Thanks to his more complete perspective, Justice eventually notices that the lasers turn off just before they reach the corners on either side of the doorframe that you entered from. After he calls his insightful observation out, you and Logan carefully begin to retreat. Temporarily having to turn your head to see if you’re too close to the proceeding group, you nearly step right into them and Logan hastily yanks you to him. Catching yourself as you crash into his chest, you gulp and look up at him shyly, but appreciatively. Timidly spinning you so that you’re facing forward again, you're forced to scoot backwards even closer due to the incredibly tight gap that you're in. He holds you to him while the waves pass with a hand firmly pressed to your stomach and though you do your best to hide it, you blush and smile to yourself because he doesn’t let you go.

When the looming threat of danger ends after the lasers cease their display and the main corridor lights turn back on, you hesitate to take a step. You briefly glance up at Logan and lightly bite your lip to suppress the smile that creeps back onto your face as you gently remove his hand. Assuming the lead once more, you swiftly enter the room that you worked so hard to reach and locate a console. Finding a note nearby that indicates that the lasers are able to be reprogrammed in their “aggression mode” to fire selectively, but requires yet another password to do so, you hold it out in front of you for the two of them to read over your shoulder, “what is it with Duvos and passwords…?” 

Justice scrunches his eyebrows together pensively, “so that's why the drones ain't attackin' Duvos... they must have registered 'em.”

Logan looks probingly from Justice to you, “so if we get the password, we can turn 'em all off, right?”

You nod and make a quiet pondering sound, “yeah, in theory…” you set the paper aside and pull a mischievous face, “oooorrrr… maybe we can use Justice's aptitude to our advantage…” noticing that they both immediately caught on to what you're thinking, you chuckle a little, “c'mon, let's hurry up and see if we can figure this out.”

Though this encryption was unexpectedly far more complicated than the previous few, it doesn't take the three of you much time at all to decode it. After you reset the command system to fire on the Duvos soldiers, you move to the hallway again to see if your opportunistic idea panned out. When your enemies are left scrambling to avoid the sneaky gift that you gave them, you gasp excitedly and exchange fevered high-fives that it worked. Itching to get in there, Logan charges inside now that you have the upper hand and you both eagerly follow. 

Assistance from the friendlier lasers makes things much easier and before you know it, the previously daunting fight is finished. While you eye the lasers suspiciously to ensure that they're not going to fire on you now that you're the only ones left, Justice makes a soft sound to get your attention and you turn to him curiously. He nods his head towards Logan who has zeroed in on a small wooden box and judging by the timid way that he's going through it, you don't have to guess at who the items belong to. 

Walking towards him cautiously, you kneel down at his side. Looking briefly at what he has in his hands as he trades a battered shield for an old leatherbound journal, you anxiously search the limited view that you have of his eyes in the hopes of guessing what he's thinking. He gently sets the journal down and his voice comes out soft and hoarse, but rapidly grows stronger and more agitated as he processes through his haggard thoughts, “Pa... I can't believe it. He came all this way. He was tryin’ to warn me about this…! Protect Sandrock... Duvos... this is what he really meant... this is what it was all about...! Those villains... I'll get them. I'll get them all!”

In his panic, Logan looks to you for support and answers, seemingly waiting for you to explain away the implications of his heartbreaking discovery. Floundering to come up with anything to say verbally as you hold his distressed gaze, you gulp slightly when you realize that your tacit expressions don't seem to be reaching him, not nearly enough. Watching the hopeful light in his eyes fade in defeat, you know that you've, in effect, rendered yourself useless by knowing him as well as you do. His pain is yours and it's debilitating. Inhaling softly to quell your own feelings, you regretfully look over at Justice and silently beg him to help you help him.

Calling on what once was and arguably still is an incredibly tight knit friendship, Justice does his best to step in, “Logan, I know it's tough, but we need you here and now! You can't let them get to your head. You hear me?”

“You're right…” Logan glances down sadly at the box of Howlett's possessions. He listlessly grabs the gun inside of it and whispers, “I'll protect Sandrock, Pa…” he grips it for one final moment before turning to you, “I want you to have this. It was his shotgun. I reckon you've done enough to earn it. Pa woulda been real impressed with you, I'm tellin' ya.”

“Oh, Logan… I couldn't possibly…” you say breathlessly, startled by his offer.

He firmly shakes his head, looking at you with pleading eyes as he holds it out for you, “do me the honors… it'd… it'd mean a lot to me.”

Searching his eyes slowly, you feel yours lightly fill with tears. Timidly collecting the gun from his hands, you rest it in your lap and pause to affectionately rub your thumb over the stock while you imagine the innumerable stories that are forever etched into the worn metal. You scrunch your eyebrows together tightly and with a shaky inhale, you nod in acceptance. As you carefully sling it over your shoulder, Logan smiles faintly and helps you adjust the strap so that it's secure around you. Looking up to find his eyes one last time, knowing that you need to keep moving, you hastily pull him into a brief, sturdy hug and without thinking, you peck his cheek through the cloth of his mask as your lips pass by. You feel his body subtly tremble as he melts into your arms, using every fleeting second of your embrace to calm his thoughts and emotions. 

Reluctantly pulling away, wishing you could address all of this for just a moment longer, you cup the side of his face and stand as you shift your attention back to Justice, “alright… we should go.” 

Justice glances curiously between the two of you and nods, wordlessly assuming leadership of your small group for the time being.

Encountering more soldiers when you eventually arrive at the engine bay, you all urgently deal with them and Logan remarks over the final bit of noise, “this is what they're usin’ to bring up the engine…” 

“Woah…” you say distractedly as you slow to a stop after tossing the last soldier onto the floor from being overwhelmed by the immense size of the engine up close. 

“Quick, let’s destroy the hook!” Justice urges, his voice piercing through your preoccupied state. 

Dashing to the engine, you climb onto it and unsheath a large knife to cut the ropes, “I’m on it!”

Focusing intently on completing your incredibly important task, you whirl uneasily when you hear Justice exclaim, “what–! Pen!”

Smugly adjusting the sleeves of his Duvos uniform, Pen chuckles and walks forward casually to the center of the platform, “not even a hello? I’m hurt…” shooting you a meddlesome look, he smiles widely and wags a finger at you, “uh-uh-uh. I wouldn’t touch that if I were you…”

When Pen attacks you to stop you from successfully severing the rope, you hastily leap back onto the platform to retreat. He laughs a little at your speedy recovery and raises an eyebrow at you contemptuously, finding himself eager to duel with you again after all that’s come to pass. 

Recalling the pact that you made when you saw him earlier as you skid to a stop between him and Justice, Logan assumes a defensive stance, prompting the two of you to do the same, “we take him down, together!” 

Just as it was the first time, the three of you fall into a rhythm of taking turns to plant indignant blows to every inch of Pen’s body in the hopes of besting him; however, unlike the triumphant match you had then, there is an unrelenting quality to Pen’s rebuttals. After a while, Justice manages to knock Pen far enough away from you that it provides all four of you with a brief period of reprieve. 

Wiping a bit of sweat from his forehead, Pen stares at the beads on his glove and laughs, “exhilarating. I haven't had a workout like this in a while.” Amping himself up as he intimidatingly cracks his knuckles, he jumps back and forth excitedly, “why don't we take it up a notch? Maybe I'll show you a fraction of my real power.”

As Pen hovers his hands slightly apart, you hear a low-pitched pulsing sound while an orb of light begins to form within them. Having seen this trick before, Logan inhales sharply and moves as quickly as he can to shove you and Justice backwards, “his relic weapon! Justice, Builder, look out!”

Clambering to stand up after a large, energy beam discharges above you, you watch Pen shoot a smaller version and as you dash to rejoin the fight, you’re met with a curtain of red that slams in your face. Realizing that you’re trapped, you mistrustfully shake your head and start to panic.

No…

As he barks his anxious orders, Logan’s frantic voice distantly echoes into the room that you’re in and seems to emanate through you in slow motion, “find a way to cut the engine, I'll keep him here!” 

Pounding his fist against the wall that now stands between you, the sound of Justice’s protest is gradually replaced by the fretful drumming of your heartbeat, “we can't leave you here, Logan!”

No, no, no…

Not again, not like this. 

Yelling Logan’s name in the hopes of encouraging him to retreat, Justice continues to hit the barrier and groans frustratedly when he doesn’t even look in your direction, “dang door! Open!”

Frozen in place as you watch Logan and Pen square off, you’re too scared to speak. It’s not that you don’t have faith in Logan’s abilities, it’s what you don’t know that terrifies you. Beginning to run scenarios through your head, the resounding factuality that emerges in all of them is that Pen has no reason to hold back anymore, leaving you scrambling to guess at how far he’ll take this. As they spar, Pen’s spiteful, vindictive attacks and the smug smile blazoned across his face provides irrefutable proof to you that he intends on seeing this match through to the end, regardless of the outcome. 

Amidst the chaos, the glint of the reenergized relic weapon registers with you, Justice, and Logan much too late. Only able to press yourself closer to the obstacle that’s preventing you from reaching the person that you desperately want to protect, you temporarily lose the strength in your legs when Logan receives a direct hit and collapses to the floor. 

Celebrating the sight of one of his most sworn enemies lying powerless in a crumpled ball, Pen laughs triumphantly and shoves Logan’s shoulder forcefully with his boot so that he rolls onto his back. Placing his foot dominantly on Logan’s chest, Pen rests his elbow across his knee and leans down snidely, “the look in your eyes... this hate, this fury, like a beast being cornered. Pitiful and weak. This takes me back… oh yes, Howlett had the same look when I injected that virus into him…”

With a swift kick, disinterested in having pinned him so easily, Pen pushes him away and backs off. Logan leaps to his feet and his wrathful voice emerges from the innermost reaches of his soul, “…what? You– YOU poisoned my Pa?!”

Enthralled by Logan’s rage, knowing that he has him where he wants him, Pen laughs even harder and mockingly beings to divulge the clandestine, heartwrenching truth, “oh, my dear Logan, before you meet your end, let me tell you how your Pa really died… your rescue plan almost worked! But I couldn't let that bumbling old man get away now, could I? And tell everyone our little secret…”

Shaking his head in disbelief, Logan weakly staggers backwards a few steps, “no…”

Pushing him a bit farther, Pen chuckles proudly and stares Logan down with an unyielding malice as he concludes his demoralizing tale, “those puny little firecrackers? Please… I finished the job myself.” 

Finally finding your stolen voice as Logan mercilessly launches at Pen, playing right into his hand, you shout with an immense urgency in the hopes of stopping him, “Logan, don't!!!”

With an infuriating grin, Pen casually dodges his attack and Logan slips in the process of turning around. Dangling precariously by his hand over the ledge of the platform, Logan adamantly attempts to pull himself up, but can’t seem to get a good enough grip. Looking on helplessly, not a single breath is let out by either you or Justice. 

“Yes!” Pen exclaims sharply as he closes the distance, “that look! Such a pity that I'll never see it again once I kill you.”

Cruelly stepping on Logan’s fingers, Pen smirks raptly when he gasps in pain. Indignantly reaching up with his free hand to grab at Pen’s ankle to try and free himself, Logan falls again and groans fearfully, “ah–! You–!”

Scolding him by making soft tutting sounds with his tongue, Pen lowers his voice and glares at Logan, “don’t be in a rush, let me enjoy this moment…” 

“Pen…” Logan whimpers through his gritted teeth, “you monster…”

Amused by his new moniker, Pen emits a wicked laugh, “monster? I like the sound of that. Rolls off the tongue. But I'm afraid I have to bid you farewell. Say hi to your Pa for me.”

When Pen shoves Logan off the edge and you see him fall, the sudden sound of a grappling hook sticking into the metal above the door scares you and a frustrated, relieved tear trails down your cheek when you realize that Logan is at the other end of it. Slightly unable to believe that he managed to get himself out of the rather sticky, daunting situation, Logan pants heavily and sweeps to defend the two of you through the impassable divider, subsequently preparing himself for more. 

Disappointed by Logan’s clever recovery, Pen sighs and raises his hands defensively, ready to conquer what he only expects to be a relentless phase of their battle, “look at you, got a few tricks up your sleeve it seems.”

Watching as they continue to fight, Justice becomes even more impatient and flits in place with urgency, “c'mon, we gotta help him! Let's get this dang door open!”

Though you're incredibly shaken, you wrangle your currently evasive perseverance and nod vigorously to convince yourself and him of the truth in your reply, “we've got time to make a battle plan, I'll start on the door!”

Pacing a little, Justice distractedly replies, “good call. Cool under pressure, that's you to a T, Builder. Alright. Battle plan. Battle plan... Pen... weaknesses... think... think, man, think…!”

You laugh faintly, grumbling with your focus, “as kind as that is, I'm anything but cool right now, Justice… I'm fuming.”

Snapping his fingers excitedly, Justice spins wearing a massive smile, “I've got it! A mirror! That guy's always lockin' himself in his room, just starin' at himself... kind of a bad look if you ask me... but we can use that to our advantage! I'll bet at the right moment it could make for a killer distraction!”

You gasp and grin elatedly, “Justice, you're a genius!!”

Exhaling deeply to refocus himself, he dashes to a shelf in the corner of the room, “quick, let's look around and see if we can find anything here we can use!”

Frantically searching alongside him, you eventually look in a locker and find a shiny fragment of what appears to be a broken mirror. Celebrating together at your acquisition, you remember that there is one more obstacle preventing you from leaving. Now that you're thinking a bit more clearly, you scrunch your eyebrows together and smirk at your adept realization, “wait… I actually don't need to repair anything, I just need to…” moving swiftly towards the console, you furiously break it to cut the power and like irritating, rational magic, the red door disappears.

Rushing to step in front of Logan to block Pen’s next abusive hit, you're panting with wrath as he retreats thanks to what almost transpired. If the protective fury inside of you was visible, you'd light up the whole room. Instead of your daggers, your typical weapon of choice, you reach straight for your pistol. Pen raises an eyebrow tauntingly as you take direct aim at him, the decision serving as a stark contrast to how you felt when Miguel threatened to do the very same. Justice trailingly inches a bit closer and is right there beside you with his own gun drawn. The two of you outright block Logan from Pen's view and you impart your stern warning to him in a low, intimidating tone, emphasizing each and every word, “if you even flinch, Pen.”

All that you learned in listening to he and Logan's conversation is what you consider to be the ultimate betrayal. When you lump it in with everything else that you've witnessed since his downfall began, in your mind, no matter how much you cherish the person that you thought you knew, for Pen and the glimmer of redemptive hope that you harbored on his behalf, there is officially no coming back. 

Smirking rapturously at how angry you are, Pen quips, “awe look, little Logan has his friends back. Fine, I'll defeat you all.”

Fulfilling your threat as Pen springs forward, he dodges the pair of bullets that come flying at him with unnerving ease. Narrowly rolling out of the way, you quickly realize that Pen is pursuing you and you alone as payback for your hateful comment. Though you’re often known for your terrifying strength for someone of such petite stature, you’re finding that you have none left after that fearful encounter. Justice rushes to your rescue and you both can tell that Logan is rattled, but he’s working through it. Doing your best to push yourselves on Logan’s behalf, trying to foster a period of respite for him, you and Justice obstinately release your animosity on Pen. 

Not long after your incessant match resumes and appears to be one that will go on for quite a while, a sluggish bit of movement catches your attention in the background. Curious to learn what pulled your concentration, Pen follows your gaze and laughs heartily when he sees that the engine is being lifted towards the surface at last, “you're too late! This is over!” 

Groaning under his breath, Logan tiredly pants, “it’s over Pen! Surrender!” 

Without a single word, Pen starts to charge his relic weapon again and just before he takes aim, Justice looks tensely at you, “we don’t have time for this!”

As your last, desperate attempt at vanquishing him, you hurriedly huck the reflective piece at Pen and distract him well enough that the three of you have the opportunity to rush in and send him flying off of the edge of the platform. Pausing reflectively for a short moment once you hear a dull thud, you exhale shakily and convince yourself to peer over the ledge. 

Lost in thought as you stare at Pen lying unconscious on the floor below, you whirl around when Justice distantly shouts, “Builder, Logan! You guys get down there and stop that robot! I'll stop the engine, somehow! Leave them to me.”

Having done the same thing as you, Logan scans the surroundings on the lower floor and rapidly spots the robot in question. Hurriedly calling out after him as Justice dashes further and further across the walkway, not wanting him to go off on his own, he shouts concernedly, “Justice!”

Gripping the railing to stop himself, Justice adamantly shakes his head and points into the cavernous space, “Logan, you get down there, that's an order, dangit!”

Sighing dejectedly, knowing that he won’t convince him, Logan replies and laced within his words, you detect both an apology and an affirmation of trust between the two men, “... got it, Sheriff.”

Fixated tensely side by side until Justice is out of view, you waste no time jumping into Logan’s arms to fiercely hug him when he disappears. Not phased in the slightest, he fully catches you and keeps you suspended off of the ground with your knees bent upwards and your ankles pressed together. 

Mumbling shakily against his neck, you squeeze your eyes shut and sniffle, “I knew… I just knew this morning and… oh, Logan… if anything would've…” 

Inhaling deeply as he buries his nose in your hair and lets his eyes droop closed, he devotedly tightens his grip on your torso and sways slightly after losing his sightline to the gravity of you as it centers him instead, “we… we gotta…”

Nodding sadly, you reply just above a whisper, “I know…” 

Gradually setting you down, he huffs softly and looks at you with a faint sheen in his eyes. Lingeringly letting his gaze wander across your features, he furrows his eyebrows together and slowly extends his hand, cordially offering it to you, “c'mon… let's finish this.”

You stare at his benevolent gesture for a brief moment and your flustered expression dissolves into a small, warm smile. Cautiously taking his hand, you find his eyes once more and reassuringly smile even wider, “for Howlett.” 

Watching the corners of his eyes wrinkle from his own resulting smile, Logan tugs you gently and wordlessly beckons for you to follow. When the two of you start running as the clock in both of your heads begins to tick, you reluctantly let go of each other to focus on sprinting through the labyrinth that stands between you and victory. Blindly rushing into a chasmic room that lies at the bottom of the ship, you find yourselves face to face with the robot. The sound of alarmed soldiers announcing your arrival snaps you out of your clouded headspace, but not nearly as much as the final, familiar voice that greets you. 

“Logan! Builder! How did you... where did…?”

Your eyes widen in disbelief as the massive armored suit being shielded in the background of the fresh batch of aggressors spins inquisitively in your direction. 

Matilda?!

Chomping at the bit to get this over with, Logan quickly takes charge of the conversation, “lookin' for Pen? He's a little tied up right now…”

Trying her hand at being persuasive, just like she used to be before she revealed herself, Matilda intentionally softens her voice and it makes your skin crawl. Listening to the sickeningly sweet tone that she falsifies in an effort to seize control of your unanticipated interference only infuriates both of you more, “please Logan, let’s not fight. Wasn't I there for Sandrock? Didn't I do everything for you?”

Having none of it, Logan bellows in response and gestures accusatorily towards her, “there for Sandrock!? You killed my Pa to keep your dirty secrets!”

Determined to turn the tide in her favor, Matilda presses her luck a bit further, “how could you say that? I didn’t order it! You already gave Pen his just deserts for that awful incident. I'm just a poor old woman being loyal to her country… please… I have children back in Duvos. I don’t want to be in this situation anymore than you do. I specifically told the army to not harm anyone in Sandrock, didn’t I? Just let me go… I don’t want to fight you…”

Though he chuckles irritatedly under his breath at how desperate she is, Logan fearlessly provides her with no reprieve, “cut the crap, Matilda. If you don’t want a fight, surrender!”

With a heavy, annoyed sigh, Matilda mobilizes the suit and approaches the two of you alongside the soldiers that have been guarding her, “I’m so sorry it’s come to this…”

Casting each other a reassuring glance in preparation for the latest challenge of your invasion, you and Logan mercilessly begin what can only be appropriately termed as an onslaught. Spurred on by your resentment for the integral threat Matilda and this moment represents, you work tirelessly until you manage to isolate her. As she obstinately stands her ground, you call out to Logan and inform him of the weak points in the robots engineering that you’ve located. Noticing that there are shields around the arms and a pack of sorts on the back that presumably is the power supply, you swiftly make your decision on who focuses where and plunge in once more.

Furious with your discernment after you deal enough damage to the two attributes, Matilda roars and in one fell swoop, sends you and Logan flying towards the opposite end of the room. As you sluggishly muster the strength to reach each other to ensure that you’re both alright, a sudden, metallic crashing of metal pulls your respective attentions.

Realizing that the source of the noise was the engine shattering into pieces behind her, you grin and immediately cheer, “Justice, you did it!”

Distraught by the development, Matilda’s carefully crafted exterior perishes, “no…! No!”

“It’s over… you’ve lost…” Logan grunts softly as he wobbles to his feet and helps you onto yours. 

Seething with hostility as she frantically activates the robot into what it coins as “Battle Mode,” she all but comes unglued, “I will never forgive you!” Narrowing her eyes spitefully at you in particular once she’s armored, Matilda hesitates after unexpectedly seeing a devious opportunity, “Logan, did you really think I was working alone this whole time? Builder, no, Tiger, why are you still pretending? Come on, fight alongside me!”

Furrowing his eyebrows together, Logan spins to look at you distressedly, “huh!?” 

Laughing a little to herself at what appears to be a fleeting glimpse of gullibility, Matilda speedily nosedives into her new plan, “of course you didn’t know! Our little obedient Builder. You never found it suspicious? Anything you want, they're there. In all the town meetings... listening to all the plans…”

To put it mildly, you’re fit to be tied having found yourself in this position again. Just as it was before with Miguel, your good naturedness has been thrown unfairly and inaccurately into the spotlight, except this time, the person that you trust the most is the only one present to hear it. Meeting Logan’s eyes anxiously, you wonder if he understands how paralyzing this torturous discrimination is for you. 

Happy that he can openly defend you in this moment rather than be confined to the shadows like he was then, Logan staunchly shakes his head and glares at her, “stop jokin’ around, it ain’t gonna work!”

Matilda smirks and tilts her head apathetically, “how adorable. You fell for our little ruse. You think a lowly Builder is conveniently equipped with such skill? Come, Builder! Join me! For the Empire!”

Though you can't see anything but his eyes, you readily sense the comfort that he's trying to provide you in them. Nodding once to indicate that you can say your piece, he cautiously monitors your now pacified expression as you turn to Matilda wearing a small, sly smile. Rather than coming unhinged on her to illustrate that Logan's wordless reassurance meant a great deal, you suppress your unquenchable anger and decide to calmly reply instead, “a manipulator to the end, huh?”

Having received your intrinsic message, you hear the grin in Logan's voice as he boastfully shouts at her, “you’ve failed, Matilda!”

Intimidatingly ramping up the machinery, Matilda snaps and crosses her own point of no return, “insolent fools! I’ll destroy you!” 

Hastily unsheathing his daggers, abundantly ready to end this once and for all, Logan leaps into action, “she's rattled, c'mon, let's get 'er!”

Calling on your partnership's arguably unbreakable bond, the two of you continue to incessantly chip away at the weak points that you identified. Knowing that the suit can't take much more mistreatment, Matilda capitalizes on the preset attack mode that she switched into and creates a new, cowardly challenge. Continually launching into the air to evade your advances, she utilizes a beam of light to rain down on you every chance she gets. Mostly running to dodge the highly dangerous weapon, you and Logan quickly get split up, which is exactly what she was trying to achieve. 

Out of nowhere, Logan hears you cry out and he spins to see you tumbling backwards on the ground. For once, you weren't quick enough. Unbeknownst to him, the force of Matilda’s light beam knocked you off of your feet and managed to cut through your upper arm like butter, searing a large gash into it. After he realizes what happened, Logan's eyes widen and he spitefully unloads an entire clip into her as a distraction so that he has a chance to reach you. In one fluid motion, he swiftly picks you up and runs across the room, sliding behind the rubble pile of the destroyed engine for cover just as her laser begins to glow again. 

Yanking his mask down to free himself from its impediment, Logan pants anxiously, “are you alright?!” 

Gasping heavily for air through your nose as you half-heartedly shake your head in response to his question, you whimper and forcefully bite your lip to take your mind off of how badly your arm is throbbing. When he tries to gently inspect it by grabbing just below your elbow, you audibly wince and immediately rip yourself free from his well-intentioned grasp. 

“Stop it and lemme look,” he scolds you seriously as he delicately rotates your arm, doing so this time by holding your wrist to ensure that he doesn’t hurt you. Now that he has a better view of it, he scrunches his eyebrows together worriedly, but the rest of his cautious expression doesn’t waver. Upon closer inspection, it’s a wound deep enough that will most assuredly require stitches and is more than likely going to leave behind a nasty scar. 

Telling yourself that it's okay to take a peek at the lesion because Logan fooled you with his less than reactive expression, one that he specifically maintained for your sake, your stomach instantly does somersaults at the sight of it. Hastily finding his eyes to calm down, you insistently whimper, “w-we don’t have time for this…!”

Noticing that you're fighting back tears, he stands his ground on the matter, “I know we don’t. You gotta stay put, I'll be–” 

Though it breaks, you sternly raise your voice and reprimand him for even humoring the thought of taking her on alone, “no! I could care less what shape I’m in right now, you don't get to do this without me. It's you and me, remember? We made a promise.”

“But you can't–”

“Like hell I can’t! I can and I will.”

Torn by the only feasible option, he clenches his jaw in an effort to compose himself. After deciding that there must be another scenario that prevents him from parting from you, Logan faintly shakes his head and keeps his eyes trained on your arm. 

Pleading through your shaky breaths, you cover your injury with your hand so that he can't see it anymore to shift his focus, “Logan, this is the one time that you're going to have to let me win. I know you're as hardheaded as me, but she can't get us both. I'm fine, I'll be fine. I'm right behind you.” When he doesn't react, even after she blasts through another section of fallen debris, you cast him your most convincing glare and shove him away from you as hard as you can, “go!!!”

Scared to death by the idea of leaving you like this, though he knows that you're right, Logan resistively groans under his breath and cups both of your cheeks to hold you still while he plants a markedly deep, lingering kiss on your forehead. Tugging his mask up over his nose once more as he dashes out to pull her away, he does his best to use his panic-stricken energy against her. 

Refusing to let your egregious injury remove you from the fight, especially after receiving that fleeting gift of motivation, you frantically fortify your mind to push through the pain as you weakly grasp your rifle and crawl up the rubble pile. Using a large chunk as a rest in lieu of your defunct arm, you relentlessly open fire on her. Logan smiles a little to himself at your quick thinking when he notices how you’ve overcome your hindrance. Your mutinous teamwork ensures that Matilda can never corner either of you despite your physical separation. Logan keeps her occupied at close range and works diligently to destroy the arms of the suit while you focus on the core at the very center. Whenever she aims in your direction, trying to throw him off, you craftily duck behind the mound and use the inadvertent opportunity to reload.   

Eventually, you run out of rifle bullets and whine at the inconvenience. Knowing that she's nearly finished, you smile when you come up with another way to make yourself useful. Ripping some of your clothing to hurriedly wrap a haphazard bandage around your wound to control the bleeding, you race out into the open and utilize every ounce of adrenaline that you have to get through. 

The familiar boom of a shotgun breaks Logan's concentration as he whirls to locate it, the sound of its echo flooding his mind with a multitude of memories, many of which he had long forgotten. To his surprise, he sees you defiantly holding your ground armed with Howlett's gun. The sight of you stops him in his tracks and returns him to the present as he watches you entrancingly jump back into action, easily drawing Matilda and her unrelenting fire away now that you've revealed yourself. He puffs his cheeks out with a sharp exhale, miserably failing to hide his attraction to your bewildering propensity. Only snapping out of it when he hears you call out for him, he forcibly settles himself and dons a large smile, eagerly rejoining you in the fray. 

It doesn't take much longer until you successfully ground the taxing contraption. Noticing when sparks begin shooting out of the annihilated machinery, you cautiously move in to stand at Logan’s side as he backs up to meet you. Letting his temper get the better of him when your arrival serves as a reminder of what she did to you, Logan furiously barks and shifts his stance to be slightly in front of you, “surrender, Matilda. We got you cornered!”

The damaged speakers from within the suit crackle as Matilda laughs and quips, “surrender to the Alliance? Never!” 

The shrill screams of seizing, metallic joints and spouted error codes flood your ears. Watching nervously as smoke billows out of the core, you and Logan hear Matilda beg the equipment to cooperate in spite of its defeated state, “you darned machine... come on. Get up. GET UP!”

Against all odds, the failing suit stands. Sharing a worried glance, you and Logan exhaustedly ready yourselves for more as Matilda laughs triumphantly in the background. When you hear the phrase, “Emergency Egress System, engaged,” you halt your approach and listen to Matilda panic while a short countdown sequence commences. In a matter of seconds, she launches upwards and crashes into the ceiling above, rapidly disappearing from view. 

Incredulously staring at each other as you process through what just happened, the two of you start to smile. Logan furrows his eyebrows together and chuckles a little, “did she... she–...?”

Justice suddenly appears and startles you both after dropping down from a landing on one of the upper floors. Following your bewildered gaze up into the sky, he shields his eyes from the light shining through the gaping hole that she left behind, “dang, did I miss all the action?” 

Logan laughs and clasps a hand on Justice’s shoulder, “it… wasn’t much.”

Seeing the corner of his eyes wrinkle from his growing smile as Logan returns his softening gaze to you, you giggle raptly, almost deliriously at his happy expression, and you watch him take a few cautious steps towards you, “we… w-we did it… how… how did we…?”

Once he reaches you, Logan shakes his head in amazement and pulls you into a sturdy, loving hug, “I haven’t got the faintest clue…” 

Feeling like the third wheel when your tender embrace lasts a little too long, Justice grins and clears his throat teasingly. When you instantly rush over to tackle him into his own hug, he chuckles heartily and teeters slightly from the abrupt impact. Tightening your grip on him, you murmur delightedly against his shoulder, “I’m so glad that you’re alright. Dropping that engine really saved our skin, or well… most of mine anyway…” 

Scrunching his eyebrows together in confusion, Justice releases you and notices your damaged arm, “woah, Builder… you alright?!” 

You smirk and glance at Logan wearing a wide, easy smile, “I’m fine, Justice… I’ll be fine.”

“That don’t mean that you’re goin’ anywhere until you get that wrapped up, an’ not in clothes…” Logan scolds gently as he references to a spot for you to sit, “we can’t have you bleedin’ like that the whole way back. C’mon, let's get you patched up an’ we'll get goin’…” 

Allowing him to help you take a seat, you laugh softly at his subtle mothering. Stealing a glimpse of your injury once you're stationary, you get nervous all over again and you subconsciously begin to ramble in an effort to work through your latest, overwhelming burst of agony, “okay, okay, fine. You're right… and hey, don't you hate on my patch job… I did my best! I know you'll do better… two hands and all… d-do I at least get points for creativity…?”

Logan chuckles amusedly and stays silent, making it clear that he's ignoring you because of your harebrained, deflecting state. As he retrieves a spare, much more appropriate cloth from inside his jacket and kneels on one knee to tend to you, your silliness rapidly disappears and you're utterly helpless to keep the love that overflows from the depths of your heart and into your eyes a secret.

Questioning whether or not he should look away once Logan's attentiveness has such a strong effect on you, in every respect understanding what you’re thinking, Justice simply smiles and shakes his head. 

Wishing that you could see all of him rather than just what’s unobscured by his mask, you whisper as your gaze longingly traces over Logan’s face, “thank you…”

Tying the makeshift bandage to secure it, he nods and falters after he looks up at you, finding himself a little taken aback by the satiety in your eyes. Searching yours warmly, he smirks and affectionately rubs his thumb on the lower, uninjured portion of your arm, “anytime.”

Successfully making the long trek back to the surface, you're beyond relieved when Grace descends on Daisy to pick you up. As you approach her to depart, the sudden, deafening barrage that heralds the arrival of the Alliance dogfighters causes the entire group to explode with one last pulse of excitement and you elatedly witness them chase the Duvos airship towards the border.

Once your celebration wanes and you refocus yourselves on returning to Sandrock, Logan carefully helps you get onto Daisy with Justice’s assistance and instructs you to hold onto him instead of the saddle to save you from having to strain yourself during the ride back. He dutifully wraps an arm around your waist to secure you as you take off and you eagerly nestle yourself into his side and shoulder. Though you haven’t noticed until now, you realize that you’re trembling from the massive amount of adrenaline that has been pumping through your body for hours and is dually a result of the shock that you've incurred from your injury. Weakly thanking him under your breath, you resignedly close your eyes and sink deeper into his embrace to allow his warmth to siphon your pain away. Devotedly resting his cheek on the top of your head, Logan protectively tugs you a bit closer and lets his vigilance assume control to ensure that you don’t encounter any final surprises on the way home. 

After what feels like far too short of a trip for your liking because you’re exactly where you want to be, Logan murmurs softly as he lifts his head off of yours, smiling ear to ear, “now that’s a welcome…” 

Opening your eyes tiredly, you squint into the late evening sun while they adjust and lean forward slightly to peer past Daisy. Immediately delighted by the sight you discover, you giggle a little at the amplifying sound of cheers, “Peach, it's the whole town…” 

Right before you land into a sea of those you both hold most dear, Logan slides his arm out from around your waist and gazes down at you to make sure that you’re doing alright. Contently greeting his eyes with your own as the world falls silent for a lingering moment, you affectionately nuzzle your forehead against his to impart your sentiments and move away just in time for Justice to aid in your dismount. Grateful that his mask is hiding his blushing cheeks from the private exchange, he exhales besottedly and follows closely behind you into the applauding crowd. 

Getting yourselves engaged in separate conversations, you do your best to fill in Trudy without thinking too intently about your aching wound. While speaking with her, she notices the blood that’s soaked through the bandage that Logan fashioned for you and frantically tells you that you need to get yourself to the Clinic. You begin to wave her off in an attempt at being as indifferent as possible to not sour the good mood, but a soothing, low voice interjects on your behalf, “not to worry, Trudes… I've got ‘er.”

Entirely unable to disguise the startled, lovesick look on your face when you turn to find Logan standing beside you, he smirks a little at your surprise and fluidly places a hand on your lower back to usher you in that direction. Politely removing it when you adhere to his guidance, he leans down and quietly informs you that he, unlike Trudy, won’t take no for an answer. Overcome with infatuation thanks to his considerate generosity, the most you can manage is a shy smile in response and the two of you depart, practically joined at the hip the whole way.

When you enter the Clinic, Fang immediately sees the deep red coloration on your upper arm and asks you to sit down on one of the beds. He leerily glances at Logan as he starts to tug the curtain closed, “I need to tend to the patient.”

“No,” you quietly blurt out, “no, it's… it's okay, Fang.” Momentarily locking eyes with Logan before you nervously look down, blushing at how adamant your interjection came across, you grip the edge of the bed and softly clarify your desire, “I want him to stay.”

Humbled by your vehement, impassioned request, Logan gulps a little and waits patiently for Fang to give his approval before he moves even a step further into the room. Though Fang isn’t sure how to feel about Logan after everything that he put Sandrock through, you're quite close, so he trusts your judgement. Nodding curtly as he busies himself with other things, Fang wordlessly leaves you alone to obtain some supplies. 

Slowly shedding your gear and armor until your seemingly innumerable layers reveal a simple tank top, the corner of Logan's mouth raises into a smile now that you look less battle hardened and more like yourself again. Unfortunately, removing your clothing provided the three of you with your first uninhibited glimpse of your injury’s rather grave appearance. True to your upbeat nature, in trying to distract from how anxious you just became after seeing it as you warily sit down on the bed once more, you beg Fang to stitch it up artfully so that it leaves behind a cool scar. Logan smirks at your feeble attempt to make light of the situation as Fang pulls up a chair and raises it to have better leverage. He places a metallic tray full of medical equipment on the bed beside you and picks up a small cup, handing it to you.

“Here,” Fang says coaxingly, “for the pain.” 

Whining under your breath as you collect it from him, you mutter a soft “thank you” and take it. 

Logan prudently looks on as the interaction unfolds, but elects to give the two of you space. He isn’t entirely sure where to be and is debating whether or not to grab a nearby stool or remain standing. Heedfully noticing that you’re getting more nervous the longer Fang continues to prepare, he decides to sit just behind you on the bed so that he’s close enough to be there if you need him. Too focused on working through your apprehensiveness, you train your eyes on Fang’s every movement and only a distant part of your psyche acknowledges Logan’s benevolent choice. 

Contorting your face to express the vulgar words you refuse to say out loud in a ridiculous act of pure stubbornness, you impressively manage to stay stationary as Fang tediously begins to work his way through removing the grime and singed, unsalvageable pieces of skin. Deliberately keeping the motion obscured from Fang's view as soon as you flinch, Logan discreetly stretches his hand out to hold yours and gives it a comforting squeeze. You exhale shakily through your nose and hastily tighten your grip on him, hoping to impart just how grateful you are that he's there with you. 

When the laceration is finally clean and the stitching starts, you wearily lean backwards into Logan's chest to mentally escape the pain. He casually sits farther forward to ensure that Fang can still reach where he needs to as he supports your enervated frame. Gazing down at you worriedly, Logan tries to distract you, “why don't we tell the good doctor what we found today, hm? Sure he'd appreciate bein’ filled in on how you got all banged up.” 

You crack a faint smile and swallow anxiously to disguise the inevitable trembling that you know will appear in your voice, “yeah… sorry, Fang. I know you're–” you wince as he threads his needle through a rather deep portion, “p-probably curious…” 

Inexplicitly agreeing to let Logan do most of the talking, you chime in every now and then to disclose your perspective during his explanation. Chatting does seem to help the time pass a bit faster and before you know it, Fang is busily creating a sling for your arm. Though it is by no means broken, Fang and Logan dotingly scold you for how easily they both know that you'll get wrapped up in doing something and forget that you're injured, so to forcibly prevent you from reopening the wound, they concur on their plan to hinder your movements with the cloth restraint. Negotiating your battered servitude, you manage to get them to approve you wearing it just for tonight to provide the stitches with a chance to set. Embarrassed that they know you so well once they yield, you blush and grumble through your teeth, “I promise I won't forget…” you chuckle defeatedly, “it hurts too bad.”

Reluctantly letting go of Logan’s hand to be assisted in getting your clothes and gear back on, you begrudgingly surrender your arm to Fang once you’re finished to receive your new accessory. After you’ve been supplied with explicit instructions and numerous medications, you graciously thank Fang for his help and head over to say goodbye to X.

Before Logan has a chance to follow, Fang bestows a rather firm warning to him when you move out of earshot, “be careful with her.” 

Stopping in his tracks, Logan looks at him questioningly and slowly nods. Understanding just how serious he is from the hidden intensity in his demeanor and message, especially for a man of very few words, the fact that he chose to say it at all is humbling enough to make Logan wonder just how much you mean to him. Keeping his voice low, Logan holds Fang’s gaze to show his genuinity, “I will.” 

Glancing over your shoulder when you realize that Logan isn’t behind you, you catch the end of their interaction and pause inquiringly. Nodding once more as he softly repeats his promise, Logan walks forward and attentively shadows you as you make your way towards the door. Though you'd like to ask what that was all about, you astutely decide against it. 

Watching Logan glance at the graveyard while you leave the Clinic together causes you to realize that today must've taken an immeasurable toll on him. Discovering that there was a second, more dire layer to Howlett's death was hard enough, but because it was unfortunately cast aside given the rest of the day's events, you know that he really needs a friend right now.

“Hey, let me take you somewhere… just for a little while.” 

Logan's distant gaze returns to you curiously when you tug on his sleeve. He instantly starts to question you, but you swiftly cut him off with an intentionally cheerful smile, “nope, no questions… just blind trust. Can you do that for me?”

He smirks and nods, narrowing his eyes at you suspiciously, “do you even need to ask after all we've been through? Go on, lead the way.”

Teasingly beckoning him to follow you with your finger as you head to the left of Mort's place, you sigh happily to yourself at his sentimental goading, “that's more like it… c'mon then.” 

When you get close to reaching your destination, you spin wearing a large smile and he chuckles warily at your goofy demeanor. Scrunching his eyebrows together as he pulls his mask down now that you're alone, he provides you with your first glimpse of his slightly confused grin, “the tram carts?”

You eagerly nod, “mhm-hm, aaand… we're going, whether you like it or not.” 

Logan chuckles even harder and makes an accepting face, “alright alright, whatever you say…”

Opening the exterior door, you motion playfully for him to step inside and he rolls his eyes at you as he tips his hat ridiculously low to match your theatrics, “you gotta tell me what we're doin’... I'm worried that them pills Fang gave you went straight to your head.”

Dramatically latching the door, you giggle and cast him an even sillier expression before pressing the button that activates the pulley system, “it hasn't… w-well…” you smirk nervously and suddenly get serious again when you start to move, “okay, uh… m-maybe it has. I just realized that I haven't been on one of these things since I fell down into the canyon with Justice.” Timidly glancing over the edge, you gulp, “I… I probably should've thought this through…”

Logan laughs and immediately comes to your rescue by putting one of his hands on your lower back to steady you, “don't you worry… a real good builder put this contraption together. I have it on high authority that she's thorough.” 

Laughing a little yourself, you needily lean into him and shrug bashfully, “I don't know, that same builder should've known those cables were gonna snap before she so stupidly sent herself on a one-way trip… she almost paid pretty severely for it too.”

He chuckles and raises an eyebrow teasingly, “oh, you thought I was talkin’ ‘bout you? Nope, mhm-mhm, thought we were clearly talkin’ about Mi-an…”

With a sharp, offended gasp, you stick your bottom lip out and laugh even harder when he hurriedly tackles you into a hug. He pulls you tightly to him, failing to contain his amusement at your jokingly saddened state, “awe no, no… don't gimme that look, I… I was only kiddin’…!” 

You gently punch his arm to get him off of you and he speedily releases you, “I know, I know, relax… but, truthfully, she deserves more credit than she's given. She's an incredible builder.”

“That's all well and fine, sure…” Logan leans down extremely close to your face with a mischievous grin as he walks past you to one of the further railings, “but… she's not my favorite.” 

Blushing deeply at his comment, you shyly roll your eyes while you make your way over to join him. Propping your hip against the siding as you grasp onto the wooden frame to anchor yourself, you distractedly begin to admire the view.  

Logan's content gaze lingers on you for a moment before he sighs softly and observes you more seriously, “you ever gonna tell me what we're doin’ up ‘ere...?”

Anxiously confessing your plans, you turn to him with a faint, consoling smile, “I want you to pretend like I'm not here. I… I know that the things we learned earlier were… well... I-I have no way of conveying just how sorry I am about Howlett. I saw it in your eyes as soon as we left Fang's. I didn't want you to be by yourself when all of the chaos ended and you had time to think about it, s-so…” you shrug, referencing with your head out into the Eufaula, “I figured this was a good distraction. I hope it gives you a bit of space away and a break from everyone else that hasn't left either one of us alone for days. I won't say anything, but I wanted to be here for you when things hit… like you said, after everything we've been through, it didn't take much for me to guess what you needed.” 

Inhaling shakily because you saw right through his guarded, defensive visage, Logan grips the edge of the cart and averts his eyes as he tries his best to prevent his sorrow from outright consuming him, “t-thanks… I… I wasn't lookin’ forward to tonight.”

Without realizing that he's in tremendous physical pain from all the excitement of today, you reassuringly place a hand on his shoulder and simply nod in response to show good faith in your efforts. He groans quietly, a little startled by your affectionate gesture, but heavily transfers his weight onto his forearms to lean into your touch in the hopes of receiving additional comfort. Smiling amorously at his implied request, you slowly start to massage his back to soothe his weary body and he gratefully hangs his head with a dull whimper. 

Staring out into the vast canyon below, attempting to give him space, you become more intentional with your one handed alleviatory movements and he progressively loses every remaining ounce of his strength under your tranquil protection. Letting his misty eyes droop closed as your silence does the trick in fostering mental freedom for him, he easily sinks deeper into thought and completely relaxes following a solaced sigh. Skewing your resulting smile to the side of you that he can't see to hide that you witnessed the moment of peace, you monitor his facial expressions closely until he eventually opens his eyes with slow, pensive blinks and comes back to you from wherever his mind just went. 

“How are either of us still standin’?” Logan murmurs unhurriedly as he looks over at you, “I'm ex–...” he pauses when a large yawn interrupts him and smirks at the ironic timing, “exhausted…” 

Meeting his inviting, watery eyes, you helplessly yawn through your answer and happily return to his side, “you can say that again, today was… relentless.”

He adjusts his stance to be closer to you and winces as he does, causing you both to laugh, “guess the adrenaline's really startin’ to wear off…” 

Getting an idea, you disappear behind him once more and gingerly wrap an arm around his stomach to hug him as tightly as you can. He cranes his neck to try and see you when you rest your cheek in the middle of his back, but you shrink further out of sight and giggle. The elation you hear in his voice provides you with an image of how absurdly wide his smile is as he asks, “what're you doin'?”

The sanctuary his warmth provides from the cool breeze caressing your skin quickly lulls you into your own state of calm. “Shut it,” you tease softly, “I know that it's a bad hug, but I only have one good arm right now. Take it or leave it, yakboy.”

Exhaling deeply with a hearty chuckle, he reaches down to hold you securely to him and you stand motionless as he lightly rubs his thumb across your wrist. Inching his hand upwards a bit further, he carefully tugs on yours in an attempt to pull you around to be in front of him, “c'mere… ain't no fun if I can't see you.”

Conceding immediately despite your verbal protest, you casually slide yourself in between the cart and him, “you're supposed to pretend I'm not here, remember?”

In an effort to be nearer to you, he stretches his arms out as he balances on his palms and mumbles tauntingly, “for somebody tryin’ to be invisible, you're quite the… distraction.”

Looking up at him with a glare, you scoff and laugh nervously, “oh, that's not fair. You can't use that against me after this morning…!”

Deciding to diminish the already trifled gap, he leans on his elbows instead and impishly grins as he joins in on your laughter, “don't worry, I'm not complainin’... jus’… figured you should know. It certainly worked on me earlier.” 

When you notice that his tactful, increasing proximity means that his chest is now pressing against your shoulder blades, you yank him the rest of the way to you and desperately try to scold him as your laughter devolves into giggles, “just, hush and come here… you're hunched over like an old man. You're already broken and I'm not about to be the reason you get off of this thing and can't walk home.” 

He laughs even harder with you for a good minute and the two of you are in delirious tears by the end of it. As you both settle down, he glances affectionately at you and spots the small stitched tear in the shoulder of your coat that was a result of your match at the hideout. Pausing to reflect on the memory, he tepidly lays his chin on it and whispers with his lips dangerously close to your neck, “I know I should be a mess, but honestly I'm… I'm okay. Thank you… for bein’ there… for everythin’ really.” 

Getting goosebumps from his subdued voice, your eyes flutter closed and you chuckle softly as you devotedly nestle into his embrace, “you're welcome. I'm… I'm always here. I'll always be right here.”

You stay like that together for the rest of your trip, returning to that position even after you reach the other side and send the tram back. The small talk comes easy, your voices staying quiet and blissful as your tacit unwillingness to move an inch away from each other remains the lone constant. When you arrive back at the station in town, you patiently wait until the cart bumps to a gentle stop before you break apart. Bestowing serene goodbyes as you go your separate ways, you remind yourselves that with things finally appearing to be over, there is always tomorrow.

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Chapter Text

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When tomorrow comes, you drag yourself out of bed later than you usually do and sluggishly begin your morning routine. Aside from the extensive body aches that serve as a reminder of how formidable yesterday’s events were, particularly those concentrated in your gravely injured arm, you’re certain that you didn’t get nearly enough sleep to pass off as functional. If you had it your way, you’d probably spend the entire day in bed and not even think twice about doing so like you normally would.

Exiting your house once you feel like you’re awake enough to face the world, you find that Trudy is already waiting for you. Apologizing that you didn’t realize that she was out there, you hurriedly walk to your gate. Waving your apology off, she explains that she’s there to impart a personal thank you on behalf of herself and all of Sandrock for what you’ve done since you moved here. Humbled by her generous words and the reason for them, you’re quick to agree to join her when she invites you to an emergency fireside meeting that’s being held shortly. 

As you open the doors to City Hall, you’re startled to hear the sounds of lively chatter instead of the typical silence that echoes throughout the space. Making your way into the rather packed entrance, you’re instantly met with an enthusiastic welcome. Blushing a little from the unexpected eminence, you distractedly begin to trail behind Trudy as you convey a haphazard series of hellos and thank you’s to everyone that greets you. Concluding your whirlwind civilities with a very relieved Rocky, Krystal, and Pebbles, you turn to see that the upper level of the hall has been commandeered as a makeshift stage to accommodate the large, energetic crowd. Noticing that Justice, Grace, and Logan are already standing there and are all looking in your direction as you walk up the steps, you get a bit anxious and wonder if they’ve been delaying things until you arrived. Glancing questioningly to the opposite side of the room when you spot a group of people that you don’t know, you suspiciously inspect a rather tall man in a highly decorated Alliance military uniform as he chats with a few lower ranked soldiers. Furrowing your eyebrows together as you try to figure out who he is, Grace tugs your arm gently as she makes space for you between her and Logan while Trudy tries to call the meeting to order. 

From the moment that you walked in, Logan has had his eyes trained on you. Attentively picking apart the subtleties in your appearance and demeanor to see if you’re doing alright, he smiles softly to himself after detecting a handful of choice details as you draw closer. You intentionally wore a long sleeve shirt to disguise your injury in the hopes of avoiding any extra attention that its exposure would incur, you made the decision to continue to sport your daggers and pistol, indicating that you’re still just as tense about yesterday’s events as he is, and what is perhaps his favorite of them all, is the faint series of lines that are still etched into your cheek and temple from a much needed night’s rest. 

Feeling a sense of relief that you’re finally by his side again when Grace plants you there, Logan glances down at you happily and speaks quietly to protect your conversation from any prying ears, “mornin’... how’s that arm of yours? See you ain’t wearin’ the sling… not like I'm surprised after you made such a big fuss about it…”

Though you were doing your best to ignore him, knowing that you need to concentrate on the important task at hand rather than the enticing possibilities of where today may guide the two of you, the sound of his voice alone causes the already restless butterflies in your stomach to take flight. Last night was arguably a new form of torture without him and so is the indifferent facade that you’re desperately trying to maintain. Smirking softly as you continue staring ahead, you subduedly reply, “morning to you too… it's alright… it hurts more than I’d care to admit… a-and besides, we made a deal… I said I was only going to wear it yesterday…” 

“How is it that you’re this stubborn, Builder…? You're gettin’ worse by the minute…”

“Oh, is that what you think of me…? Hmph, I should hand you a mirror… maybe it’ll reacquaint you with your bandit charm that you brandished me with so long ago… that redeeming quality of yours isn't getting any better either from where I'm standing…”

Yielding to each other with discreet, content chuckles, you watch Logan bashfully adjust his mask out of the corner of your eye. Even after you feel his stare linger longer than most would consider to be polite, you still refuse to look at him directly and you softly scold him as your cheeks tint themselves red, “what do you want, yakboy…?”

He helplessly grins and murmurs affectionately, “nothin’...”

Groaning under your breath that you only blush harder in response, your previous quick-wit disappears, “well, c-cut it out and pay attention… it looks like Trudy’s starting…”

Ending your flirtatious banter just in time for the meeting to kick off, your gaze instantly flickers towards the unknown man when Trudy introduces him as Commander Avery. She surrenders the floor to him and he placidly steps forward to address the room with a small nod, “greetings. Yes, as soon as we heard the news, we set off without delay. The leader of the Alliance Guard personally chose me to handle this mission. We hardly dreamed they would be so bold as to attack us so deep in Alliance territory. Our air wing chased the enemy air destroyer all the way to the Duvos border. We can confirm that it went down a little afterwards from taking heavy fire. We've also done several sweeps of the northern ruins, arresting all of the leftover Duvos troops. I can confidently state that Sandrock is now completely safe.”

You giggle when everyone erupts into elated cheers. Turning to admire the heartwarming display, you shake your head a little and sigh reflectively. The journey that you’ve found yourself in these last few months has been full of trials and tribulations, many of which were littered with what, under normal circumstances, would be destitute. Abundantly grateful for those who helped you through it and for the enticing light at the end of the long, dark tunnel, you can’t help but feel overwhelmed that the day you’ve worked so hard to reach is finally here. Never did you imagine that accepting the job in this broken, desert town would cause you to change in the ways that you have. You’ve found hope in the most surprising of places, even within yourself. As of today, there is not a shred of doubt in your mind that Sandrock is your home and it will be forever.

Though his words are rousing and uplifting, Avery’s stone-like expression doesn’t waver. Waiting until the noise dies down, he takes the opportunity to address the more aggressive side of the military's response, “this attack was a blatant breach of our cease fire. Rest assured, Duvos will answer for what they've done here.”

A stern, but leery voice interjects, one that unexpectedly belongs to Logan, “you want to hit 'em back? That'll mean war…”

The mood immediately changes from celebratory to concerned. Avery eyes Logan curiously, seemingly sizing him up as he does so. As a fictitious storm cloud materializes atop Avery's already towering presence, a result of Logan's unwelcome interruption, he calmly replies, “the Alliance values peace above all else, and has no intention of provoking war. However, we have never and will never back down from a fight…”

Worriedly glancing between the two men after sensing the newfound tension, Justice quickly intervenes and shoots Logan a glare while exuding a more friendly demeanor in the hopes of distracting from the silent dispute to get things back on track, “good to hear! Say, Commander... I don't suppose you could take a few of these criminals off our hands? Our jail only seats six comfortably and... well, we gotta uphold our own standards, else we're no better than they are!”

Avery's stare coldly flickers to Justice, “we will stay in Sandrock briefly to prosecute any other missions Mayor Trudy had in mind for us. Then we'll leave with all Duvos prisoners, including the war criminal Pen. Everything will be smooth, so long as we're not interrupted.”

You hear Logan groan faintly and it takes everything in you to not elbow him in the ribs for acting so childishly. Though you might agree with his previous statement, you don't feel as inclined to question one of the Alliance's more senior officers.

At least, not yet. 

Flashing a smile to keep up the act, Justice chuckles and nods, “smooth as Yakmel butter, that's how we do it around here! Let us know if we can help.”

Avery openly scolds him, causing a moment of mild, uncomfortable shifting amongst the group, “I said ‘so long as we're not interrupted’…”

Justice accepts the loss, sighing defeatedly with a small frown, “stay out of your hair. Gotcha…”

Watching Justice's presence shrink slightly from Avery's combativeness, you scrunch your eyebrows together and begin to realize that it's becoming increasingly aggravating that he's behaving so rudely to your friends. He may have a responsibility to maintain some level of distance from the situation, but you certainly feel like he's being unnecessarily defensive for someone who has thus far been met with only genuine curiosity and support. 

I could care less about a title… honestly, who does this guy think he is? Did he somehow forget that we've already handled everything without him? Justice was just trying to be nice… 

Grace pipes up to try her hand at appeasing Avery and you get to see a new side of her, the real side of her, in action, “Commander, has your company received any ACI orders?”

Swiftly reminding Grace of her place, Avery shakes his head, “official orders have not been received. However, it has become clear to me that you have been in clear violation of a 735; which warrants an evaluation by your superiors.”

Grace folds her arms vexedly and you can hear it in her voice as she replies that her patience is running as thin as yours, “that's funny, I thought I was up for a Medal of Honor…”

Avery takes a step forward and lifts his chin discreetly to her, signaling his immovability on the matter, “there are no medals awarded for backtalk. Return to Atara at once and take it up with your superiors.”

Without realizing that it's audible, you scoff heatedly to yourself and intentionally bite your tongue as you pull a not-so-subtle, indignant face when Grace goes quiet. Doing your very best to keep your flaring temper under control, you hastily voice the argumentative words that you'd like to in your head.

Aside from the obvious benefit the mask provides in disguising his riled expressions, Logan has always known that he has an impressive poker face and is currently using both to his advantage, allowing him to outwardly fare far better than you are with Avery's irritating militancy.

That said, it should be noted and come as no surprise, though he'd never admit to it, that Logan secretly enjoys your exceptional lack of tolerance for unjust moments like this. Finding a great deal of humor in your reaction, understanding that Avery's dig at Grace means you're just about ready to implode if you don't say something soon, Logan is quite eager to see if you'll be pushed enough to act on your rebellious emotions. 

If he's being honest with himself, he just might join you.

Justice makes an untimely, sad remark in the midst of your snide vocalization, “Grace is headed out? Dang, that's right... I forgot she wasn't part of the Sandrock crew for a minute there…”

Avery gladly ignores Justice's background comment altogether to grant you with his undivided attention instead. You felt his gaze dart to you the second you made a sound and you've been avoiding it ever since to ward off the impending confrontation. He narrows his eyes at you, but his firm tone wanes slightly, “is there a problem, Builder?” 

“No…” you look up and provide him with your most unwavering, defiant stare to ensure that it's abundantly clear you're lying through your teeth for the sake of civility, “no problem, Commander.”

He smirks under his breath, pausing to contemplate how he should handle your tacit challenge when you don't back down and to everyone's amazement, rather than continuing on his inherent warpath, his own probing demeanor softens, “Avery…” he gently corrects you, “just Avery is fine.” 

You're completely caught off-guard with the fleeting glance of humanity that he just provided you. Sensing all of the eyes in the room fall on you, similarly baffled by Avery's change of heart, you pick up on a rigid presence beside you and as expected, the only hardheaded outlier with a lack of fuzzy feelings for any of it is Logan. Ignoring him for a moment, you begin to work through the questions that you would like to ask on the town’s behalf now that you've unexpectedly bent Avery's ear. 

In a twinge of protective jealousy, deeming him unworthy of being the recipient of your argumentative charm, Logan lightly rolls his eyes at how quickly Avery folded under your disarming scrutiny. After he watches you gift Avery with what he falsely perceives is a counterfeit, olive-branched smile, Logan impulsively keeps a close eye on your facial expressions while you skillfully obtain the answers that you seek. Noticing when you relax a little as the conversation evolves, Logan predictably does the exact opposite. Foolishly wondering why he feels even worse now that you've successfully put an end to the barrage of slighted commentary like you both wanted, he huffs softly to himself and tries to let the fact that you so easily captured Avery's affections go. 

Whether he likes it or not, you'll always be the girl that everyone wants to know. 

Tactful as ever, Trudy seamlessly suggests that Avery retrieve the commendations that he would like to hand out to regain control over the slightly sidelined meeting. He nods and motions for those of you on the provisional stage to line up for the rest to see. Once Trudy divulges an incredibly kind speech, praising the four of you that have been momentously deemed “the heroes of the Battle of Sandrock” for your efforts, Avery works his way down the line to distribute the medals that he has in his hand. Starting with Grace, he moves to Justice, Logan, and lastly you. Rather than simply handing you your medal like he did with the others, Avery takes special care to pin yours to your shirt and you smile softly, casting him an appreciative glance. Grace, Justice, and Logan all simultaneously raise an eyebrow at the interaction. 

Having additional matters to discuss, Trudy dismisses everyone and beckons for Avery to follow her into her office. As she passes by, she remarks to you that if there’s anything that you’d like to say to the prisoners, you should do so sometime today before they leave in the morning. Curious as to why she took the time to make the comment to you specifically, you nod and contemplatively watch her depart. 

Though he begins to follow, Avery abruptly stops and intently returns to you. Your eyes widen a little after seeing him change course and you survey him suspiciously as he politely removes his hat, tucking it beneath his forearm. In the background, Grace, Justice, and Logan all halted their own approach to observe this next strange fraternization unfold. As you and Avery speak to each other, Grace’s eyes flicker between the two of you and Logan. The longer the dialogue lasts, the more irritation she can feel radiating off of him and she hastily bites her lip to hide her growing smile. 

Once Avery withdraws and disappears out of sight, the three of them resume their convergence on you. Grace smirks and teases you in the hopes of getting an answer while she dually tries to make Logan sweat, “boy… you clearly got his attention. What did he want?”

You chuckle and nod a little, “I must have, but I’m not entirely sure why… I was ready to get into a fistfight with him earlier and now...” looking down shyly because of how forward you know this is about to sound, you smile sheepishly, “he, uhm… he invited me to have dinner with him tonight to discuss the Northern Development projects. I think he’s hoping to persuade me to join the forces up there. Even before he asked, I’ve heard that they really need builders and I’ve been curious to learn more about what they’re working on for a while now…” inhaling sharply, you shrug and look back up at Grace and Grace alone to avoid Logan’s subtly territorial gaze, “but I was incredibly clear that I have no intention of leaving Sandrock. As exciting as the work sounds, you couldn’t pay me enough to go. He unfortunately didn’t seem all that convinced for some reason…” 

The three of them chuckle and quickly exchange baffled glances. 

“What…?” You question defensively, “is it such a crime that I'm interested in the projects up North? Even though we are literally decorated Alliance war heroes now, I'm still a builder at heart…”

Grace sighs exasperatedly and gives you a playfully cynical look, “it’s not that… it’s just… well… these two might not know this, but Avery has a fairly reputable track record of getting what he wants and it’s typically never over dinner and drinks. It appears that he’s made a benevolent exception for you… mhm… I couldn’t possibly imagine why he’d do that…"

Logan rolls his eyes and softly excuses himself as he moves elsewhere, deciding that he’s had his fill of Avery for quite some time and moreover, because he thinks that you’re not reading into the situation deeply enough. Justice chuckles a bit harder and belatedly excuses himself as well to follow Logan in the hopes of cheering him up.

Scrunching your eyebrows together in confusion at the two of them, you scoff quietly at Logan’s sulky behavior when the reason for it finally registers. Little does he know, you aren't completely oblivious. In fact, you're seriously flattered by the hidden implication of Avery's invitation. You smirk and cast Grace a giddy look once they’re far enough away, “don't worry… he's not getting me…” you giggle and drop your voice into a more hushed tone, “no matter how good he looks in that uniform…”

Later that evening, Andy, Logan, and Haru are relaxing in Andy’s room in the Church Dormitory. Given everything that’s been going on, Logan and Haru have been bunking with him to stay in town rather than travelling back and forth from the hideout. In the middle of a game of Critters, Andy tells Haru that he’s getting hungry. Though he’s been brooding in bed the vast majority of the day, Logan immediately jumps up and offers to go fetch dinner from the Blue Moon. 

Haru whines as he defeatedly rubs his face, “oh Logan, please don't… this won't end well.”

Logan tuts at Haru to silence him as he slips on his boots, “ah, c'mon Haru… quit your worryin’. We gotta eat, right? I mean, what's the worst that could happen?” He shrugs and continues to avoid making eye contact with a hearty, distracted chuckle, “I'm jus’… checking on ‘er while I go get dinner, that's all… two birds, one stone.”

Haru and Andy both exchange an amused glance wearing rapidly growing smiles. The two of them swiftly set their cards down and silently agree to give Logan an even harder time for this newfound, obnoxious excitement from the mere idea of seeing you. 

“You ain't so bright,” Andy mockingly parrots his “what's the worst that can happen?” comment, “how're you gonna trust one sayin’ but not the other? Them's called ‘famous last words’ for a reason… you hate that Avery feller, you're gonna do what you always do – march in there and cause a scene.”

Haru laughs a little at Andy's painfully accurate retort, “see?! Even Andy knows better.” Realizing that Logan isn't listening, Haru drops the act and shakes his head as he begins to plead on your behalf, “Logan, I'm serious… let me go instead. I'll even tell her that you said hello. She won't care if I show up… if anything, she might find it funny and realize that I'm checking on her for you… but you going in there is just asking for trouble. What will you do if she isn't happy to see you? What if she thinks that you don't trust her?” 

Pulling up his mask with a soft groan, Logan breezily dons his hat and hurriedly walks across the room to depart. Ignoring their words in the hopes of convincing himself by the time he gets to the saloon that they aren't true, he mutters anxiously, “she won't think nothin’... she trusts me… it'll be fine.” 

Andy rolls his eyes and flops dramatically onto his back next to Haru once he's gone, “sheesh… don't let the door hit ya on the way out.”

Thus far, your evening with Avery is going quite well. Doing your best to ignore the implications of your public entanglement, you’ve genuinely only been discussing the Northern Development projects and you’re having a nice time learning more about his involvement in their trailblazing efforts. Out of habit, you've placed yourself with your back to the wall in the large booth that is nearest to the lower entrance of the Blue Moon. It’s where you like to sit when you aren’t taking dishes to-go because it gives you the ability to greet those who drop by. On a busy night like tonight, you’re using the position to intentionally keep an eye on Grace and Owen to make sure that they don’t need any help. 

Seeing the door open in your peripheral vision, you glance over and immediately lock eyes with Logan as he walks in. Stopping mid-sentence when you don’t rejoin the discussion right away, Avery follows your gaze curiously. You scrunch your eyebrows together and eye Logan suspiciously as you try to figure out why he’s there. Tracing his path as he moves further into the room, Logan finally looks away to say hello to Owen as he excitedly welcomes him in from behind the bar. Letting your eyes flicker to Grace when she approaches the two of them after entering from the kitchen, you have a speedy, fretful discussion through your facial expressions with her and it turns her loose on evaluating the reason for Logan’s arrival on your behalf. Seamlessly redirecting yourself to Avery again, you feel comfortable enough to forget about the whole thing because you know that she’ll handle it and report back later. 

Though she doesn’t know him nearly as well as you do these days, Grace has a sneaky suspicion as to why Logan showed his face this evening. He made it rather clear after the awards ceremony that he isn’t too keen on being around this many members of the Alliance military and the saloon is predictably overrun with them given their stay in town. Noticing that the two old friends are wrapped up in a jovial discussion, Grace takes Logan’s order out of Owen’s hand and disappears to deal with it. 

When she returns, she catches the end of their conversation as Owen departs to tend to his customers, “hey man, thanks again for stopping by. Hopefully, the next time that we see you you’ll be in that booth over there and I can make you something that isn’t on the menu… a-and on the house to celebrate, of course.” 

Supporting himself on his folded arms on the bar top, Logan chuckles and shrugs while he glances past Owen as he moves behind him to steal a pointed glimpse of you, “sure, lookin’ forward to it…” the lighthearted tone of his voice fades a little as he mutters discreetly to himself, “hopefully next time there ain’t gonna be any interruptions…” 

Grace smiles to herself after realizing that their banter must have been relatively centered around Logan's poorly disguised jealousy and she quickly decides to test just how envious he actually is, “here you go, everything should be in there…” she references in your direction with a grin, “glad one of us is enjoying our visitors, seems like they're having a good night. I've never seen the Commander like this, he's usually so… hm… how can I put it nicely…? Stoic…? I didn't think it was physically possible for him to smile, but I guess she's making it a point to prove me wrong.”

Logan pushes himself momentarily off of the bar and smirks softly, looking back at you over his shoulder. Far too distracted to keep still, he leans impatiently on his palms once more, “hmph, let ‘im enjoy it while it lasts, I'm glad he'll be gone in the mornin’… can't believe he's tryin’ to steal ‘er for the Northern Development projects… who does he think he is? Waltzin’ in ‘ere to take our star Sandrocker away… she saved the whole damn town, she's not somethin’ to be bought over dinner.”

Unable to suppress her snarky, well deserved quip, Grace chuckles and shakes her head pathetically at him, “Light, you're dense…”

Insulted, Logan spins and glares at her vexedly, “...‘scuse me?”

She rolls her eyes and her voice comes out sounding defeated, but only for your sake, “don't worry about it… guess the real reason is lost on you anyway.” Grace teasingly snags the towel she was wiping down the counter with and swats his hands as she moves away, “say hi to Haru and Andy for me.” 

Logan groans under his breath, irritated that he knows what she's implying, but he refuses to acknowledge it to avoid giving the thought any merit.

Just as he begins to collect the to-go bag, you've begun to make your way over to grab another set of drinks. With all of the extra patrons, you saw that Grace and Owen currently have their hands full, so you decided to fetch the additional drinks yourself and happily used the excuse to come say hello. 

Hoping to beat Logan before he moves too far away from the bar, you take a dramatic step forward and chuckle a little when you surprise him, your playful demeanor illustrating that you’re in a very good mood, “hey yakboy, fancy running into you here… I didn’t expect to see you tonight.” 

Logan freezes at your abrupt appearance. Smirking as he sets the bag down again, eager to enjoy your unexpected company, he eyes you curiously and tries to discern the reason for your elatedness, “oh, yeah? Could say the same to you, Builder…” he glances over at Avery, who is intently watching the two of you. Avery casually averts his eyes when he notices that Logan spotted him and it makes Logan's temper flare, causing his internal monologue slip out, “how's your date?” 

Furrowing your eyebrows together offendedly, you shift in place to play off your discomfort, “why do you think it's a date…? We're just chatting business over dinner, it's no big deal…”

Is that really what you think? That explains why you're here…

With a curt laugh, Logan continues to stare Avery down as he responds with a blatant pettiness, “yeah, business… you decided if you're gonna take ‘im up on it yet? Seems like a real great opportunity now that Sandrock is whole again.”

You can’t possibly mean that.

Why would you even say it, then? 

Looking at him with mounting fury, you scoff at his fairly hurtful reproach, “no, actually I'm not. In fact, like I did earlier, I've made it abundantly clear the entire night that I have no interest in leaving Sandrock…” you decide to take a stab at him to show your disapproval of his abrasiveness, “not that it's any of your concern and furthermore, neither is my love life, thank you very much…” 

Picking up on your resentful remark, Logan realizes that he overstepped and hastily reels in his scantily contained attitude. He worriedly returns his attention to you, but as he begins to apologize for his boorishness, one of the Alliance soldiers sitting a seat down from the two of you pipes up and mutters indiscreetly to his counterpart, “once a bandit, always a bandit… sticking his nose where it doesn't belong… guess we just give anyone one of those medals these days.” 

You both immediately turn to glare at him. Logan chuckles a little and desperately holds his tongue, knowing that no good will come from allowing himself to speak, but you on the other hand are fuming, “what did you just say…?”

The pair look your way and the one that made the snide remark shakes his head, waving you off, “nothing. I didn't say anything. Why don’t you just go back to your night, alright?” 

Maybe you've had one too many glasses of liquid courage, but in that moment, you're convinced that you’ve never seen more clearly. Furious with his erroneous remark, spurred on by Logan's flippant regard for your evening, you suddenly can't contain your unruly emotions. In a matter of seconds, you've yanked the soldier out of the chair by his collar and slammed his back into the bar to unleash your indignation on him, “no, actually I won’t just go back to my night. You’ve got my attention, so why don’t you go ahead? I want to make sure I heard you correctly. Say. It. Again.” 

Logan's eyes widen in panic and he swiftly moves in to pull on your good arm in the hopes of getting you to let go, but you easily shove him off of you to continue with your newfound warpath when your question is only answered by nervous stammering, “huh, how disappointing. Some tough guy you are. Here's a piece of friendly advice: don't you dare say that again. Ever. He may not care what people say about him, or if they respect him, but I certainly do. I trust that man with my life, in fact he's saved it more than once already. He might let crap like that slide, but I won't. I'm telling you, here and now, if you don't apologize for saying something so disgustingly untrue, you'll have me to deal with and lately pal, I've been itching for another fight. Got that? So out of the kindness of my heart, you get one last chance before I make an even bigger scene… say it again or apologize to him. Right. Now.”

In the background, the entire saloon has gone quiet. Your outburst has caused each and every person present to turn investigatively in your direction, hoping to witness how the altercation unfolds.

Avery immediately stood up when he saw you launch at him, but elected to take a more cautious approach to observe the interaction more closely. He’s curious to learn what made you so upset and is dually intrigued to see what his soldier's response will be. Grace and Owen came running out of the kitchen as fast as they could when they heard you come unglued and are frantically trying to understand what happened themselves. The second soldier effectively fell out of his seat to get away from you after Logan rushed in, unnerved by the thought of getting in the way of the two of you together. Despite his friends' poor regard for your bravery, he has a fairly hefty respect for the reason behind you both receiving those medals and wisely intends on staying out of it.

Logan has to focus on containing his amusement at your rage, he’s more than flattered that you're this irate on his behalf. It was entertaining earlier, but now that it's just for him, he isn't sure how to handle himself. A large part of him would like to see what you'll do next because you aren't getting what you’ve requested, but he adamantly tugs on you once more after noticing the increasingly tense group forming around you.

Grace interjects when Logan doesn't do a better job of it and her anxious voice snaps you out of it, “are you trying to get yourself arrested?! Let him go!!!”

Mercilessly staring at the soldier for a moment longer, you relent with a groan and forcefully release him as you storm outside to escape the unforgiving eyes in the room. Scrambling to reclaim some of his dignity, the soldier straightens his uniform and suddenly takes an aggressive step forward like he intends on tailing you, but Logan promptly intervenes to block his path. Without feeling the need to utter a single word after the soldier’s malice intent crumbles at the sight of him, Logan simply shakes his head and even through his mask, he casts a brutally intimidating, protective glare to get his point across before he slowly backs down to follow you. 

When Logan tries to pass by, Avery calmly puts a hand on Logan's shoulder and firmly grasps his coat to stop him in his tracks. Logan eyes him quite testily, openly conveying the displeasure he feels because his pursuit of you was interrupted, but when he remembers how severe the ramifications could be for what you just did, he quickly softens for your sake. 

Avery waits patiently until the door swings closed to ensure that you’re not coming back to hear their conversation or stir up more trouble. Once it shuts, he removes his hand, “well, she sure is a spitfire, isn't she…? Must be a lot to handle.”

Though he doesn’t mean to, Logan chuckles at Avery’s faultless statement and turns towards him curiously, “you can say that again…”

Speaking with a little less coldness than usual, Avery raises an eyebrow, “this was an accident, yes?”

Logan nods, understanding his implied meaning, “yeah… sounds ‘bout right.”

Avery folds his hands behind his back and shrugs, showing his more friendly side, “it seems highly inappropriate, given what just transpired, but… I must admit… you're a lucky man, Logan.”

Logan pulls a confused face and Avery smirks, actually cracking a smile at his apparent misinterpretation, “oh, I just assumed after that…” he shakes his head and clears his throat, “please forgive me. It’s my mistake.” Avery casually grabs the to-go bag off of the counter and hands it to Logan, “you have a good night.”

With his disgruntled mood expediting its return thanks to Avery's unabashed gesture, regardless of how distracted he is by his previous insinuated comment, Logan hurriedly takes the bag to refrain from doing anything other than resuming his mission to locate you. 

It doesn't take long before Logan finds you leaning on the wooden railing on the boardwalk of the oasis, pensively musing over your actions. He softly calls your name as he approaches and you briefly close your eyes in disquietude because he found you. Joining you by standing closely at your side, he says your name again, but this time with a hint of sadness. Refusing to respond, you maintain your sightline on the moon’s reflection on the water below. 

He exhales defeatedly and lowers his mask when he realizes that you’re ignoring him. Resting his elbows on the railing to be at your level, he gazes across the oasis and murmurs softly, “you alright? What was that about…?” 

Scrunching your eyebrows together faintly, you shrug and shake your head, doing your best to act like you have no idea what happened when in all actuality, you're mortified. You take no comfort in knowing exactly why you lost it as badly as you did, no matter how much the soldier assisted in inciting your temper. Readily blaming the pressure of everything lately finally getting to you instead of acknowledging what you need to, you continue manifesting excuse after excuse to cover for your choices. In truth, you’re terrified that fighting has become your default, that Logan is your default. 

When you don't even look in his direction, his nerves almost get the better of him, but he elects to make a small joke to try and cheer you up, “least you didn't deck him like you did Yan…” 

Unable to disregard the humorous memory, you smirk quietly and nod a little.

Logan anxiously removes his hat and holds it loosely between his fingers over the railing, fidgeting with it as he thinks of a way to quell the situation's awkwardness. 

Mustering the courage to look at him, feeling rather badly that he seems to be so distressed by your silence, your despondent voice comes out weakly, “what do you want, Logan…?” 

He frantically meets your eyes and fills himself with inconsolable guilt after noticing the faint, glossy sheen in yours from the tears that formed but never fell. Stumbling slightly over his grief that he’s the reason for your sorrow, he whispers and attentively reaches for your hand to console you, “I jus’… I had to make sure you were alright.” 

It's unintentional, but you come across a bit more rudely than you anticipated as you shrink away from him, though Logan sees right through it and heedfully halts his gentle approach to give you the space that you need to speak your mind, “well, I'm fine. Apparently you think I'm leaving, so I… I guess I should stop worrying so much about you, I… I don't know, m-maybe… maybe it's best if you do the same about me… y-you don't need me fighting your battles for you anymore and I'm clearly of interest elsewhere. Things are different now and I… I need to accept that. Honestly, I’m… I'm so embarrassed, that was seriously uncalled for a-and I know it, but… I mean, the nerve of that guy… Logan, I… I'm sorry if I overstepped… really, I’d understand if you're upset with me…”

Urgently shaking his head as he begins to impart his thanks, wanting to express his gratitude and invite you over for dinner because he ruined your night, Logan only manages to get a few words out before the sound of someone approaching interjects and startles you both, causing the two of you to spin to locate the source of the interruption. 

“Avery…” you say flusteredly as an unwitting, nervous blush creeps into your cheeks. You turn to fully face him and very subtly distance yourself from Logan in the process, which they both notice, “Avery, I… I'm so sorry… I didn't mean any disrespect towards you, o-or to the Alliance, I… I don't know what came over me, but that's no excuse…”

Smirking at your alarmed expression, Avery hesitates to reply after he becomes temporarily distracted by Logan replacing his mask and hat as he stands upright beside you, wielding a look that could kill, “please, there is no need to worry. The whole thing was…” he glances mitigatingly at Logan again before looking back at you, “a misunderstanding. He will be disciplined accordingly, I can assure you.” 

You exhale in relief and hurriedly nod, “that's very kind of you, thank you so much… regardless, I'll…” Logan hears your voice flatten, though it's an incredibly minor shift to force your politeness, it’s something that doesn't register with Avery, “I'll make sure to apologize to him as well.” 

The corner of Logan's mouth raises into a smile as he looks back defiantly at Avery, proud that you aren't actually sorry for your behavior, but an uncomfortable pause develops. Rapidly assuming that his presence is the reason for the mood change, Logan glances down at you and sighs softly, “suppose I… I need to be headin’ back…”

Desperately trying to stop him when a strange distance forms in his eyes, your true feelings bubble to the surface, but fleetingly, “Logan, please wait…”

Say something.

Anything…

Let's just leave. 

Logan, ask me to leave.

“No, it's alright, I gotta,” he furrows his eyebrows together and waves the bag a little, cutting you off gently because he's decided that he's caused you enough grief for one evening, “gotta get back to it, seems like you do too. I'll… I'll see you around…”  

When Logan reaches Avery, they have a voiceless conversation and a confrontational one at that. There is a stark intensity behind both of their postures, but Logan relents as he takes one final, lingering look at you over his shoulder, and departs.

You slowly rock yourself backwards to firmly plant your feet on the ground again after your body tries its best to follow suit.

Please, don't go…

Avery observes you curiously, but with a confused kindness, a result of your unanticipatedly heartbroken expression. He takes a step closer and discreetly attempts to understand what you’re thinking, “it appears that I should apologize for my own actions, I clearly interrupted your conversation… did you need to…?”

“No, I…” you answer hastily to avoid further embarrassment and prevent yourself from saying yes, “I don’t.” Reluctantly tearing your eyes away from where Logan was last standing, you shake your head and come up with a distraction, “actually… can… can I ask you to join me for something? I could use the support.”

Avery nods quizzically, “I'd be happy to, please… lead the way.” 

Huffing quietly as you steel your resolve, you nod and begin walking towards the Civil Corps office. As you make your way over, you attempt to prepare yourself to do something that you would've never asked Logan to accompany you for, but in an effort to heed Trudy's subtle warning, you know that it's your final chance to obtain much needed closure. 

While Avery temporarily dismisses the soldier that he has on guard duty to grant you with the privacy that you requested, you find yourself arbitrarily relieved that Justice and Unsuur aren’t here tonight.

“I'll be right outside if you need anything…” Avery imparts as he shuts the door behind him. 

You nod, standing perfectly still until you hear the latch click, “thank you, Avery.”

“Hi Pen…” you turn with an anxious sigh, cautiously walking further into the interrogation room, “you're probably surprised to see me… I… well, for some idiotic reason I wanted to see you… I needed to see you, just once before tomorrow to ask… how… how could you do this? To Howlett, to all of us?” 

Refusing to give you a direct response, Pen eyes you warily. His suspicious gaze flickers momentarily to Avery standing on the other side of the door, “is this some kind of trick, did you come to bust me outta here, Skinny? Could it be that you finally had that change of heart?” 

Slowly sitting in the seat across from him, you woefully shake your head, “no, Pen. I didn't, but as for you… it's… it's not too late to change…”

Pen breaks out into a hearty, bewildered laugh, “turn back? Change my ways? Why... goodness, Skinny... I mean... wow... what's stopping me from denouncing my villainous ways and re-entering society as the hero I always pretended to be…?” 

Staring him down with immeasurable hurt, you elect to hold your tongue and let him continue. 

“Oh, I dunno, how about: the people who died at my hands!? For someone so skinny you sure can be thick; geez, get it together... mumble mumble... goody two-shoes crap makes me sick... bleh!”

His insolent attitude makes every part of you seethe and you snap as you launch out of the chair, “shut up, Pen! Just for once…” you groan vexedly, “why do you have to be so difficult all the time?! Maybe you should've thought things through, I'll… I'll never forgive you for what you did to Howlett. I clearly know you're capable, I just never considered that you were the reason behind why he–” 

Pen cuts you off, briefly raising his voice to match yours, “is that why he's here? Instead of your precious Logan?” He snidely smiles when your eyes momentarily darken at the mere presence of his name in Pen's mouth, “no… no, that can't be it. I know… you didn't have the courage to tell him you were coming… did you, Skinny?” He laughs at his triumphant observation after your irate expression fails to disguise your mounting fury, “I knew it. That's why you waited until the dead of night to come and see your old pal Pen… don't you dare lie to me, Skinny… I will not be led astray by your little ruse.”

“Let me make something perfectly clear,” you hiss as you inch closer, showing good faith in your subsequent threat, “tonight is not the night to piss me off, Pen. I am not in the mood.” Realizing that he actually managed to get you riled up, you decide to allow your desire to physically hurt him wane and you choose to use your words instead, hoping to avoid repeating the earlier portion of your evening, “you're going to be put away for the rest of your life after what you've done. No one will come and visit you… why would we need to? We have everything we need. It's over…” you scoff as your anger shifts into heartache, “maybe Logan's right… maybe you really are a monster.” 

Pen hesitates for a moment when he sees your sadness take root, but he doesn't falter. Unwilling to veer off of the path he's created to disclose his truth because he knows that it's what you came to hear, he adamantly presses on, “for what? Doing what needed to be done? You may be loyal to this disgusting pile of sand, Skinny, but you have no idea how loyal I am to the Empire. I'm a Duvos knight, it's in my blood to kill…” 

You hastily meet his cold gaze with your own, “I'm not a child, Pen. I understand why you did it, but… did you really have to? Couldn't you have just trapped Howlett down there until you secured the engine? I detest the idea of him being your prisoner, but at least he'd still be alive.”

Pen shakes his head with a soft chuckle, “despite the fact that he was merely a blemish in our plans, Howlett was a formidable foe. He would have not been so easily caged.” 

Averting your eyes with a small grumble, you quickly understand that he's probably right. Reflecting on the years Howlett had on Logan, all of the time and energy he must have spent honing his skills, learning from his experiences, you peer beyond the stories and wonder what he was really like in comparison. If Pen genuinely considered him a threat, you find it less difficult to imagine the ways Howlett's prowess would've favored him in a situation like that, causing you to silently agree that your well intentioned suggestion wouldn't have been upheld.

“Dear, naive Skinny… Logan may be only a fraction of the hunter his precious Pa was, but even you must realize that he would've stopped at nothing to find him and, as much as I hate to admit it, would have eventually been successful in tracking him down. C'mon, Skinny, think… we had no choice.” 

Unsure what to say, you anxiously convince yourself to look up at him again as the weight of his words provide fleeting amounts of comfort in your gradual, begrudging acceptance of the past. 

Pen's demeanor softens as he gently begins to fill the grim conversation's void, “ah, my sweet, sweet, Skinny... your words denounce me, and yet, with your skinny legs, you stand before me… your coming here today... speaks volumes. The fact that you seem to think there's still something you can do... if there was some shred of my own heart that still did yet beat, I do not doubt that it would be moved.” 

Smirking a little, you scrunch your eyebrows together curiously at his tone change. You're grateful for the glimpse of the person you've come to know, the person that you're so desperately going to miss. 

“Hmm...! Just think of all the battles we've had! Each one more glorious than the last, all stemming from that fateful day when I taught you the ropes... as I recall, you were on your way to... do... some boring thing that nobody could care less about…” Pen pauses and smiles warmly at you, dropping his act for a brief moment to acknowledge your initial battle, when you defeated him with your intrinsic, masked farewell, “the student has indeed become the master…”

A lone tear slips down your cheek as Pen nods towards the door, his voice quiet and sincere, “better get going, Skinny… got a ship to see off in the morning.” 

Wiping it away in frustration, you exhale shakily under your breath and reply sadly, just above a whisper, “goodbye, Pen… forever this time.”

Avery moves out of the way to hold the door open for you when you leave. Quietly thanking him and then the soldier on duty for the night for allowing you access so late, you wait patiently for Avery to join you as you head back outside and eagerly welcome the fresh air.

“Did you get what you were looking for…?” Avery politely asks as you descend the stairs together. 

Too consumed by your heavy thoughts, he catches you off-guard with his question and you stammer a little, “yes… I… I did. Thank you again for coming with me...” following a small pause, you smirk and look up at him, “and, for the record, I… I’m very sorry that I spoiled our night, Avery. I think it would’ve just been easier for me to throw a drink in your face instead of doing what I did, but… you wouldn’t have deserved that and you certainly didn’t deserve having to deal with what actually happened. I… I guess I’m not capable of being ‘normal’... am I?” Grinning uncomfortably at the events of the night, you avert your gaze and shrug, “I casually assault one of your men and then have the nerve to ask you to accompany me for a friendly chat with one of the biggest threats to the Free Cities. I mean, who does that? After everything, I… I can’t say that I’d blame you if you thought there was something wrong with me… I’d probably agree with you at this rate.” 

He chuckles and his seemingly elusive kindness comes shining through once again, “no… no I wouldn't say that…” he laces his hands together behind his back and suddenly stops just past the base of the stairs, “hm… well, actually… it does seem like all of this is indeed your fault.” As your facial expression warps into a chaotic mixture of petulance and confusion, he chuckles a little harder that his teasing worked and he clarifies, “having to rush to the defense of others, always trying to see the good in them, even to your own detriment…? Most would agree that that’s not ‘normal’, but it’s clearly who you are. Why should you apologize for it?” 

You flash a nervous smile and playfully respond to his aptitude, “huh, you sure you haven't been around longer than a day? I've been surprised by a lot of things lately, but you pegging my flaws so quickly is quite impressive, Commander… I didn't realize that being psychic was something they taught you in the military.”

Avery grins because you used his title against him as payback for making you sweat and he shrugs sheepishly, “I might not be psychic, but I do pride myself on my ability to read those around me.” 

“Ah, I see…” you giggle, “so it's a personal preference then. Perhaps I should ask you to teach me how to better hone my own skills, it might come in handy someday. In fact, it probably would've saved us a lot of time if I had more adeptly wielded my hardheaded ability. Maybe I could’ve even used it to anticipate this whole Duvos debacle because seeing the good in others clearly must translate to seeing the bad… right, Commander? Or did I miss that part?” 

Through both of your lighthearted laughter, Avery invites you to take a leisurely stroll with him. After you’ve continued to throw him for a loop, starting with this morning’s challenge at the awards ceremony, he’d like the opportunity to get to know you a bit more before he leaves. Relaxing at the notion, eager to rid your mind of your worries for a while, you happily agree.

At the beginning of the new exchange, you’re still slightly guarded, but eventually, Avery manages to get you to open up. Finding yourself grateful that he’s probably the one person that you can be completely honest with right now, given that he has no ties to Sandrock or the friendships you’ve grown accustomed to, you humor his every question. The discussion transitions into an edification of your perspective on everything that’s been going on lately. Aside from divulging the pressure you’ve felt to keep a smile on your face and how difficult it’s been for you to do so, you explain why you wanted to see Pen, which ultimately brings Logan into the conversation, the true topic on your mind.

Noticing as your stream of consciousness gradually takes over, Avery freely allows you to guide the dialogue in the direction that you’d like it to go in, but you catch yourself being more forthcoming than you anticipated as soon as Logan’s name leaves your lips. You immediately stop and throw up a wall, “I’m… I’m sorry. You don’t need to listen to me vent about my problems. You’ve already shown me great kindness today, in multiple instances. It’s getting late, you probably have much more important things to attend to before you leave in the morning.”

“Actually…” Avery remarks delicately, “I’m quite curious to know what your opinion of him is. Though, given your behavior earlier, I have a feeling that I already do.”

Raising your eyebrows in disbelief, you cautiously ask why he’d like to know. 

“Sandrock has the reputation of being a lawless town. I have never known anything but order and this place… it represents everything I detest… or… so I thought.” Avery pauses and smiles a little at you, “you're not even from here and yet you defend everyone with such passion, such selflessness.” He sighs and hesitates, but continues anyway, “the Logan situation… that got a lot of attention, as you know. Take it from the perspective of a Commander, it is my sole duty to uphold the Alliance and its citizens. I came here struggling to understand why someone such as yourself would so openly defend a bandit. His reputation preceded him well, as was the intention, it seems. I… regretfully painted my opinion of him without taking the time to learn all that he's done, not just Sandrock, but for the entirety of the Free Cities. I want to take the opportunity to apologize for my assumptions. I see now that I was wrong to think of him that way and to think of Sandrock that way. Thank you for changing my mind. Maybe someday I'll come back and visit for less unfortunate reasons.”

You grow shy on Logan's behalf, gobsmacked that what you wanted to happen for him and for his future is actually working. The achievement provides you with enough comfort to disclose to Avery additional, more personal insight to Logan’s lionhearted and magnetic nature. True to his word about being highly perceptive of those around him, as you ramble through your explanation, Avery confirms his adept suspicions surrounding your feelings rather quickly, but chooses to not press you about them. 

Inconveniently for all involved, Logan is also taking a walk to clear his head. In some ways, Sandrock really is too small of a town. When he returned to the dorms after he parted from you, Haru and Andy immediately noticed his soured demeanor and naturally asked him what happened. Maintaining his silence over the entirety of dinner in his outright refusal to talk about it, the only curt explanation Logan gave was a muttered “you were right” as he left. Genuinely worried that something disastrous occurred, Haru fully intends on speaking to Grace in the morning to get the full story.

As Logan rounds the corner in front of the apartments and approaches the stairs, he hears your voice and stops to glance in the direction that it came from. He spots you walking with Avery as you pass by the Civil Corps office for the second time, making your way into the center of the square. He is far enough away that he can't make out anything that you’re saying, but at the very least, he can tell that you’re not upset anymore. Smiling a little to himself after feeling a sense of relief that you’re in a better mood, completely unaware that it’s because you’re currently talking about him, he hides in the shadows and hopes that he’ll have a chance to apologize for earlier. 

Unfortunately, what he sees next changes everything. 

Halting as you become consumed by your mission to convey your most intimately held opinion, you shrug and sigh softly, “I just… I can't stand it when people don’t even try to look at him differently now that this is all out in the open. They still only see the mask and the reputation… I don’t understand how someone can willingly continue to look past the fact that he saved this town by making more sacrifices than most will ever understand and not feel badly about judging his character solely based on two years of hard, necessary choices. The people that matter, the people here, have moved on. Why can’t they? I… I just find it so… cruel… that the bandit title will follow him around for the rest of his life. It shouldn’t matter… it doesn’t matter.”

Avery nods, his towering presence gazing down fondly at you, “you're right… but, I hope that with time, things change. For both of you.” 

Confused by his words, you scrunch your eyebrows together and look up at him, “why me…?”

He smiles a little and reaches out to take your hand, kissing the back of it before slowly letting it go, “thank you for your company tonight. As you know, we'll be leaving in the morning. If you ever change your mind, come find me. I meant what I said about having someone like yourself being a great addition to the efforts in the North, though I understand now why you're needed here.”

Blushing deeply at his gesture, you move backwards slightly to put some distance between you. While you do your best to hide your perplexed expression, you force yourself to ignore how easy it was just then to picture Logan standing there with you instead, “thank you, Commander Avery. It truly is a generous offer. I promise that I’ll keep it in mind.”

Distractedly watching him walk away for a long moment as Avery takes his leave, you lift your hand to inspect it and frown to yourself. Now that you’re alone again, the thoughts of what happened at dinner readily flood your mind. Ponderously gazing over the rooftops in the direction of the Church Dormitory, deciding that Logan probably doesn’t want to see you given the way that you left things, no matter how badly you’d like to go knock on their door to apologize for everything, you simply hang your head and stare at the ground sadly as you start to wander down the empty street. 

It’ll be better tomorrow… surely we’ll get back to normal once we can put this behind us… I just proved that my temper is as bad as his… that’s all… it’s not like I haven’t done that before…

Convincing yourself briefly of the feeble truth in your errant reasonings, you find the courage to look up from the floor. Though she doesn’t see you at first, having just concluded an incredibly taxing shift, you surprise Grace as she exits the Blue Moon. She falters and comes to a standstill the moment that she notices you and your heartbroken expression. 

Oh, who am I kidding?

As your eyes fill with tears at the sight of her and the reminder that her unexpected appearance brings, you whimper slightly and hastily look down once more. Grace cautiously approaches you and wordlessly links her arm through yours, preparing herself all the while knowing that it’s going to be a long night because you need her. Gently encouraging you to continue heading towards your workshop after feeling the tension in your body from trying to hold yourself together, her shoulders quickly droop in mutual sorrow and she quietly tells you that she’ll spend the night. Sniffling as you nod in response, you cling to her just a bit tighter and eventually break the silence with a shaky whisper:

“Light, Grace… what did I do…?”

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

Chapter Text

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

They say if you love something, you should set it free. If it returns, it's yours to keep and if it leaves, it wasn't meant to be. We are also taught that love conquers all and absence makes the heart grow fonder, but what the age old proverbs fail to factor in are the two other troublesome, influential dictators on a person's heart: life and loss. Relentless in their pursuit to exalt their opinions on love's behalf, they often guide people down paths that they never intended on taking and seldom do so without making things more complicated than they need to be.

Maybe the proverbial, love-ridden messages that we foolishly live by should come with the disclaimer that the greatest loves herald from a place of dependability. Losing sight of the reason why love exists, the very same reason serving as justification as to why two people who choose to be together are broadly referred to as partners, negates the promise that love selflessly carries into an endless cycle of tomorrows. Love’s promise to your partner solidifies a commitment, one that irrefutably affirms a vow stating that those two people will always be there for each other to contend with the meddlesome challenges that life and loss bring when tomorrow inevitably comes. 

Therein lies the problem you've now been forced to face: the promise of tomorrow.

Typically, the dawn of a new day is bountiful with comforting sentiments, ready to fulfill the yearning excitement it embodies for those who wish for change or a fresh start. This also means that it tirelessly bears the weight of a person's hopes and dreams, beholden to remain unmatched in its ability to vanquish the incessant, looming taunt of despair.

For you and Logan, that promise has been greatly tarnished with dread, inescapable in its demand to acknowledge the night before. Unlike the reassuring promise tomorrow has made to the whole of Sandrock, eager to lend its hand in closing the doors on a tumultuous, unforgiving chapter, the two of you have been greeted instead with an immovable wall of uneasiness and hurt, one that threatens to stop any and all progress. This private farewell to a second, more personal chapter is rooted in the consequential formation of a new reality, abridged by the daunting nature of the unknown. No longer will you be compelled to rely so deeply on each other, no more brushes with death to amplify your growing trust, no more furtive late nights to avoid inviting the rest of the world into the seclusion of yours. Now you're simply left with the scraps of the mundane everyday, tasked with navigating your insecurities as you work through asking yourselves what comes next.

As you stand there together, bathed in the metallic gleam of the Alliance airship, you both realize that for the very first time your roles are to be onlookers rather than key players, supportively present to those who have taken your place. The faint hum of the engines warming up occupies your solemn thoughts and the noise begins to serve as a meager distraction, providing each of you with the chance to reflect on the rift between you. 

After last night's unfortunate series of events, you've decided to remove yourself from the picture in the hopes of allowing Logan much needed time and space to acclimate to this new version of his old life. Doing your best to interpret the uncomfortable silence that has continued into this morning, you readily place blame on the altercation your hasty, well-intentioned temper created on his behalf. Assuming that he isn't happy with you for speaking for him now that he doesn't need your help like he did when you met, you elect to stay away, agreeing that you'll still be there, but only if he asks you to be. Though you're terrified that he may choose to take this imminent, monumental leap without you, potentially deciding that he doesn't want you in the process of rediscovering himself, the thought of losing him because he perceives your involvement in his evolving future as a burden is severe enough to rid you of your sensibilities on the matter. The imaginary repercussions of interfering that you manifest for yourself are quickly upheld as taboo, causing you to disconsolately relinquish your overprotective, lovelorn hold on him and in doing so, you manage to break your own heart. 

Logan has reached a similarly dire conclusion. The desire to safeguard your happiness requires that he separate himself from his more closely regarded loyalties to grapple with the arduous task of letting you go. Fearful that he's asked too much of you in your short time together, witnessing your jovial conversation with Avery last night cemented the notion in his mind. Now understanding that you're no longer the town's best regarded secret, he isn't entirely certain if you ever were to begin with. Aside from his clear support of your future, his greatest concern is that your allegiance to those you care for, paramountly himself, will dampen your seemingly limitless potential. Obtusely irrespective of how adamant you've been that this is your home, Logan is worried that with the Duvos conflict over you'll realize that your highly sought after skills are wasted in a place like Sandrock. In his misguided scheming, thinking that he's unintentionally monopolized your devoted nature, Logan has settled on fostering the latitude for you to make that ambitious choice, if the day comes, so that you're not obligated to answer that transformative question for anyone but yourself. He tangentially determines that he'll patiently wait until you request that he becomes a more permanent part of your life and as painful as the notion may be, he's ready to distance himself from you if it means that you'll stay. 

Not all was lost. Once you and Avery said your goodbyes, he turned his attention to Logan, who despite everything, remained steadfast beside you. Realizing after he listened to your edification of Logan’s character that they got off on the wrong foot, Avery wanted to placate their affinity before he left. Shocked by the gesture when Avery extended his hand, you nervously glanced between the two men and though Logan hesitated, just for a moment, he readily matched his courtesy and they ended their rivalry amicably. 

As soon as the airship disappeared over the mountains, Grace and Haru intervened. They filled one another in earlier that morning about the respective incidents that transpired yesterday evening and wholeheartedly agreed to aid in providing the two of you with some space for the time being. Grace escorted you away and Haru took your place at Logan’s side, reaffirming their allegiances that until now, haven’t been necessary. As the physical, mediating distance grew between you, though you both would like nothing more than to figure things out, you independently dove head first into your grief-stricken plans instead. 

That is the last you and Logan see of each other before he and Haru’s trial. 

You made a point to be the final person to arrive that morning. The idea of seeing the two of them on display was gut wrenching, so you delayed the inevitable for as long as your subconscious would allow. Silently joining Owen and Grace in the back, you forced yourself to glance upwards through the crowd and as you expected, you immediately faltered at the sight of Logan standing there, vulnerable and maskless for the very first time. Just as his keen gaze locates you, you look down and Grace takes your hand to give it a firm, reassuring squeeze. 

Timidly listening to Trudy and Justice start the hearing, you keep your head bowed in solidarity and without even needing to look at him, you know that Logan isn’t going to accept anything less than what the law deems as a worthy punishment. Smirking softly to yourself when he can’t stand it anymore and interjects following a spirited comment from Elsie, you bite your lip anxiously and muster the courage to look up. The disquietude amongst the group instantly overrules he and Haru’s attempt at admonishment and tensions quickly reach a boiling point. Witnessing everyone’s passionate, rallying defense begins to appease your restless heart and when Justice prudently then puts it to a vote by a show of hands for those in favor of a lighter sentence, in spite of your trepidations, you ensure that you raise yours. 

Refusing to get off that easily, Logan stubbornly points out that Cooper and Burgess didn’t raise their hands. Much like him, you’re curious to learn why, so you cautiously listen to their respective reasonings, and although Cooper actually agreed with the rest of you and cast his vote incorrectly, you still found a great deal of humor in his story-time justification. With no straws left to grasp at, you safely assume that it’s almost over, but you’re surprised when Owen requests to say a few words. 

Humbled like so many others by his incredibly heartfelt speech, one that does an excellent job summarizing your own sentiments, you’re resultantly tricked into a state of calm. Abundantly grateful that things are playing out the way that you wanted them to without having to be a more active participant, you’re visibly startled when Owen concludes his remarks by surrendering the floor to you. 

Gulping a little when every single set of eyes in Sandrock train themselves on you, you involuntarily pivot yours to the only pair that matters. While the sea of onlookers wait with baited breath to hear your reply, understanding just how much weight it holds, you do your best to have a private, comforting conversation with the man you know in every respect is terrified. It would be pointless to disclose a lengthy explanation of your opinion given that there is not a soul present that isn't already aware of your stance on the issue, so you elect to keep your response poignantly brief. 

“I vote for forgiveness. He's done so much for Sandrock,” you declare calmly, shifting your gaze to Haru with a small smile just as your eyes start to water, “they both have.”

Returning to him when everyone else turns to Owen, you watch Logan breathe a heavy sigh of relief and in that moment as you continue to exchange intrinsic, but precarious words of contentment, you feel like at long last you were able to fulfill your initial promise to him, the one you made the night you met. Hopeful that it was enough to also demonstrate that you still regard your time together as sacred, regardless of where things go from here, you mentally release him to navigate this next phase of his life without you. 

When Trudy announces that she'll be making her decision soon and wraps things up, you’re the first to walk away, eager to escape the fervent desire to change your mind, and Grace hurriedly rushes after you. Though they’re quickly bombarded, Logan and Haru helplessly watch as she carts you to the corner of the square and in a matter of seconds, they see the two of you embrace. Unbeknownst to you, Grace confessed to them this morning before you arrived that she was leaving and despite the stress of their looming sentencing, true to his protective devotion to you, Logan begged her to wait to tell you until after the trial. Uncertain as to how it would go, the three of them promptly agreed that you didn’t need two bouts of bad news, hers would be difficult enough.

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

“Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.”

Kahlil Gibran

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

As she enters the Civil Corps, electing to visit now that Logan and Haru only have a few days remaining before they’re acquitted, Grace finds herself quite concerned at the solemn silence that pervades the room once she tugs the door shut behind her. Cautiously making her way towards the stairs, Grace’s mounting apprehension causes her to wonder if she should have made more of an effort to check on them sooner.

When she reaches the upper landing, she doesn’t see them right away. Craning her neck a little to peer further into the darkened cell, she’s disheartened by the scene that greets her. Hidden in the shadows, she spots Logan lying down in the lone bed facing the wall and Haru on the ground by his side with his head hung, his back against the wooden bedframe, and an arm casually perched atop a bent knee. 

Hearing the faint shuffling sound of Grace’s halting, tentative footsteps as she approaches the cell door, Haru curiously lifts his head and smiles congenially at the sight of their visitor. He stands up slowly and waits to speak until he’s far enough away from Logan, intentionally keeping his voice just barely above a whisper, "impeccable timing as always, Grace. It’s good to see you. I’ve been hoping to have the chance to talk to you without him… he finally fell asleep a little while ago.” 

Eyeing Logan worriedly, Grace replies softly, “how are you guys holding up…?”

Glancing over his shoulder with a pensive sigh, Haru rests his weight on his arms as he slips them through the metallic bars, “I’m fine, but… he’s a wreck, Grace.”

Furrowing her eyebrows together lightly, she can’t help but smile, “mhm, I guess there are multiple forms of penance going on here…” she sighs and shakes her head sorrily, “I know we briefly had this discussion the other morning, but you really should’ve seen him that night, Haru. I’ve never witnessed such jealousy in my life. The sad thing is that he didn’t technically do anything wrong… neither of them did. As for what they’re doing now, well… I… I have no idea where to even start. This absurd, protective impasse that they’ve reached is just as infuriating as they are. They’re more comfortable avoiding each other, thinking that it’s helping, when in reality–”

He smirks and defeatedly emits a quiet groan, “they’re only making things worse. Honestly, Grace… somehow I worry that this is actually our doing. Introducing those two might’ve been one thing, but now that we’ve encouraged their secrecy and allowed so much of their relationship to be isolated, I fear that we have just as much of a hand in this as they do. How is it that they’re both this stubborn and brash when it comes to protecting each other, but throw anyone else into the mix and they’re automatically on the same page? No one in their right mind would do this to themselves, so naturally, why wouldn’t they?” 

Looking at Logan again more uneasily than before, Grace props herself on her hip and ruminatively folds her arms, “you know we can’t interfere. As much as I want to hit them over the head because of this whole thing, it’s none of our business. We might not agree with it, but they obviously mean well and if this is how they want to handle things, no matter how moronic, we… we need to let them.”

Straightening himself to follow her gaze, Haru nods sadly, “I just wish that they would talk it through. It all happened so fast… even if they still decide to step away and give each other space, at least they wouldn’t be so miserable trying to figure out what the other is thinking. Plus, her not visiting isn’t going to make this any easier when we get out of here…” he turns back towards Grace and frowns dejectedly at the consequent implication of your purposeful absence, “guess that means she really isn’t coming, is she? I suppose if she was, well… she would’ve been here by now.”

Grace firmly shakes her head, “I’ve tried changing her mind, but no... no she refuses to come. Thanks to that stupid stunt she pulled, she’s determined to stay away and… truthfully? She says that she can’t bring herself to see either of you like this…” she nods towards Logan, “especially him. The other day when I brought it up again, she said that if she visited, it would give credence to what that soldier said about him still being a bandit and it would undermine your time to atone. I personally think that she’s being ridiculous, but who am I to tell her otherwise?” She sighs heavily and prudently discloses the more confidential details of your contestations, “Haru, she’s… she’s just as big of a mess as he is. His choice to maintain his silence before you guys got locked in here somehow translated into her thinking that he doesn’t need her anymore, go figure…”

Rubbing his cheek pensively, Haru exhales and opens up as well on Logan’s behalf, “and he won’t bring himself to face her because he’s convinced himself that she’s unattainable now. He took one look at the highly accomplished, career driven side of her and decided that he isn’t worthy of her or something. He thinks that she’s just going to wake one day and disappear, like she won’t think twice about leaving Sandrock and all of us behind. He doesn’t want to stop her or be the reason she stays if she wants to go.” He suddenly chuckles wearing an abject smile, “you see, Grace? This, this is the Logan I know. The awkward, pretty much bad at everything except starting – and finishing – a fight or hunting monsters. Any of that confidence he had, and I still have no clue where it came from in the first place, is long gone. In his mind, one wrong move and it’s over.”

Biting her lip to prevent a smile from spreading across her face at Haru’s painfully accurate description of Logan, she continues to stare at him bleakly from across the cell and pauses seriously for a long, laden moment. Falling silent when his own exasperated state takes over, Haru joins her and the two friends find themselves temporarily unable to fill the grim, perplexing void. 

“Listen, Haru…” Grace eventually whispers, her voice sullen and low, “I… I don’t know what she’ll do if she doesn’t have him in her life. If you haven’t noticed, she wears her heart on her sleeve and I’m telling you, after seeing her that night, her heart beats for him.”

Understanding the severity of her statement, Haru reflectively presses his eyebrows together and turns to her, “especially now that you’re leaving…”

Producing a simple nod, Grace averts her gaze to the floor. 

“How… how am I supposed to reach her without you? I know we’re friends, but… I’ll never be you.”

“You have to try, please… for her sake and for mine. Quite frankly, I’m terrified of what’s going to happen to her. I know that it sounds a little mighty of me, but we’ve been through so much together and after all of this, the idea that I may never come back? I’m starting to think that she feels guilty, like me leaving is all her faul–...” 

Logan stirs slightly and they immediately stop talking. They exchange a discreet, nervous glance as they patiently wait to see if he’s awake. Sincerely hoping that he hasn’t heard a word of their musings thus far, Grace and Haru gradually continue their discussion once they’re sure he’s still asleep and make their already hushed voices even quieter. 

Huffing softly to herself in relief, Grace dares to speak first, “nevermind… what about you, Haru? What are you planning to do after this? Are you ever going to commit to attending university? You can’t keep an eye on him for the rest of your life, he’s a big boy despite his childish idiocy lately.”

With a playful glare, Haru helplessly grins, “I have committed, I just… I can’t leave him like this. Andy either for that matter. He’s going to lose you and if they don’t make up, all of the responsibility falls to Logan. As much as I love him, Andy needs more influences in his life and that kid loves her. It wouldn’t be fair to force him to assume that role on his own. We took him in together and until I can be sure that they’re both going to be okay without me, I… I can’t go. I just can’t.”

Grace nods in agreement, but hesitates when her resolve wavers after she thinks more intently about where you lie in your little family’s bigger picture. Contemplating whether or not she should even ask her next question, Haru subconsciously raises an eyebrow and attentively watches the wheels turn in her head. 

“Haru… I need you to tell me the truth. Best friend loyalty off of the table for a minute, okay?”

“I’m not sure I like where you’re going with this…”

“How does he feel about her? Is it what we think it is or is this all a twisted result of them being there for each other? I just… I need to know before I leave. Please, Haru… just like you, I don’t… I don’t want to leave her like this.”

“Grace… even if I turned around and asked you the very same thing, how are either of us supposed to answer that question?”

“Oh, so uhm… he… he hasn’t told you…?”

“So she has…?”

“Well, of course she has… but, uhm… maybe do me one last favor and forget that I asked.” 

“Hah, as curious as I am, to answer you, no… no he hasn’t.”

“I suppose I should’ve expected that. She’s been an open book from the beginning. Not in his style to be as forthcoming… clearly.”

“Look, for what it’s worth, I’ve… I’ve never seen him like this. Sure, we might be going a bit stir crazy in here, but I can’t justify any other reason for him being this upset. You want my opinion from this side? For both of them? I think that they’re so blinded by it that they don’t realize how they feel themselves.”

“Mhm… I couldn't have said it better myself.”

“...”

“...”

“What…? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Nothing, it’s just… Haru, you have to promise me something. Promise me that you’ll protect them both. If push comes to shove, she’s going to need you in her corner too. My greatest fear is that this new level of notoriety will ruin her if she winds up alone. We know how strong she is, but a person can only handle so much… you know that better than anyone.”

“I will, I promise.”

“Thank you.”

“Grace…?”

“Hm?”

“Promise me this in return… promise me that you’ll come back, even… even if it’s just to see all of our hard work pay off.”

“Hmph… as rewarding as that sounds, you know I can’t. Trust me, I… I really don’t want to go, for more reasons than these lovesick fools. In fact, you should know that aside from her, I’m… I'm going to miss you and all of our scheming the most. It’s been fun.”

“Fine, promise me that you won’t forget about us then. We’ll all miss you, so much… our family won’t be the same without you.”

“Now that’s a promise I can keep.”

Abundantly solaced that their more private dialogue is finished when the sound of the bed creaking interjects once again, Grace and Haru sociably turn and watch as Logan swings his legs over the side of it to face them.

Mildly embarrassed that he didn’t notice her arrive, subsequently understanding that his failing perceptiveness reaffirms that he truly isn’t himself at the moment, Logan smiles sheepishly and addresses her in a rather exhausted, raspy voice, “h-hey, Grace… sorry, hope you ain’t been there long. Had a bit of a… rough night… jus’ tryin’ to recoup some shut eye since we only got the one bed. Wanna be sure that Haru can have it back by tonight.”

Realizing instantly that he’s putting up a front to distract from his strained mental condition, Grace smiles back and humors him, “no, don’t apologize. I just got here, you must’ve heard me come in.”

Noticing it as well, Haru decides to do the exact opposite out of immense concern for his best friend’s wellbeing, “it hasn’t even been an hour, Logan… how are you up already?”

Grace subtly glares at Haru and hastily swats his side through the bars when Logan shrugs and looks down woefully in response. He winces and promptly adjusts his tune to appease her blunt instruction, “so, uhm… I was just asking Grace how the outside world is fairing lately. I overheard Justice say Musa was coming to town soon for the ‘Road to Portia’ project.” Narrowing his eyes tauntingly at Grace, he expedites an idea he just had to cheer Logan up, “things must be moving pretty fast if he’s travelling all the way from Atara to see it. Hm… well hang on, does our favorite Builder have anything to do with his decision to visit in person? I’ve heard that they’re pretty good friends. I can’t imagine that he’d come all this way without the intention of seeing her as well."

Widening her eyes to show her appreciation for Haru’s crafty ploy, Grace nods and scrambles to hold in her smile when she sees Logan’s curiosity peak, “yes, you heard right. Musa will be here to do a preliminary tour of the progress that she’s made alongside Heidi and her team. Funny enough, I think he’ll be here the day you two get released…” she cunningly adds another layer to their sympathetic tactics, “and you’re right, it’s amazing what that girl managed to get done in just one week. Boy has she been busy, I’ve barely seen her.”

Haru smirks and pretends to also be oblivious to Logan’s mood change, “hm… I can only imagine. I suppose she didn’t earn that fierce reputation of hers by taking her time, though. Maybe we’ll just have to see it for ourselves when we get out of here, right Logan…?”

The duo turn toward him inquisitively, desperately hoping that their incentive was distracting enough to avoid revealing the truth of why you haven’t come to visit. When a small smile finds its way onto Logan’s face and he nods a little, they both feel an immense sense of relief.

Briefly lost in thought as Grace moves on to confess that she brought a stash of snacks to get them through these final few days, Logan murmurs a comment amatorially to himself and it’s just faint enough that neither of them hear him say it:

 “I jus’ hope that she’s doin’ alright…” 

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

“Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.”

Robert A. Heinlein, Stranger in a Strange Land

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

When life and loss team up to force change upon love’s meticulously crafted plans, wanting to bring themselves into the spotlight instead, they are indiscriminate in the ways that they choose to manifest. For you, your outlook on life is quickly beginning to be challenged by the loss of the person that you care for the most, therefore causing you to unwittingly experience the loss of your drive and passion for the things that typically make you happy. 

With Commissioner Wei, Yan’s not-so evil twin brother replacement, at the helm and the expectations that his revitalizing guidance brings as you and your veteran team continue to work tirelessly on the “Road to Portia” project, you’re not allotted a period of rest like everyone else. Following the announcement, word spread like wildfire of Sandrock’s latest undertaking and the plan was swiftly splashed across the front page of every newspaper in the Free Cities. If that wasn’t daunting enough, when Musa caught wind of your integral role in the pioneering efforts and publicly asserted that he would be touring the groundbreaking venture in person, your already bursting at the seams reputation shot through the roof. 

Thanks to the pandemonium that took only one week to consume your every waking moment, the pressure to uphold the highest standards of service begins to take precedence over your own needs and feelings, leading you down a dangerous path, the very one that Grace saw coming. Bearing the title of a Sandrock hero means more responsibility to the town you’ve sworn to protect and with the Duvos conflict handled, the only way that you believe you’re able to do just that is to do the one thing that you were hired to do: build. In some ways, with your extracurricular outlet gone, though it is the furthest thing from the truth, it feels as if you’re starting over and have to prove your worth once again. 

Throwing yourself into your work as a result, just as you did back then, you’ve suddenly found yourself being pulled in various, often conflicting directions and it expeditiously becomes your everyday mission to still emerge victorious to maintain what you can of your dwindling sanity. Refusing to let anyone down in spite of your own problems, you continually ensure that you complete even the most minor of tasks. Overwhelmed to keep a smile on your face, you tell yourself that this new wave of frenzied incumbency will subside soon and that this change is for the better, but on the inside, your mind can’t seem to escape what was. There has been no time for you to process what happened with Duvos or to heal your wounds, let alone grapple with your decision regarding your relationship with Logan. Now that he’s safely hidden from view and obligatorily working through his frailty, taking the guilt and heartache you both created with him, you decide to tout a page out of his book and do your best to put the confounding past behind you to focus on your progressing career and future. 

Freed of their tremendous burden, the afternoon that Logan and Haru finish serving their sentence, the two brothers step into the sun and stand together on the Civil Corps porch to appreciate the arrival of this long-awaited moment. In a serendipitous happenstance, just as they emerge, you’re passing by as you busily escort Musa and his prestigious posse of advisors around Sandrock. Deep in conversation with Mint as you lead the conclave towards Water World to meet Burgess and to highlight his critical, expanded role in managing the town’s water supply, you're drawn to the familiar faces that you spot out of the corner of your eye. You immediately stop halfway up the boardwalk steps and let the rest of the world continue to move around you.

Locking eyes with the comforting, vivid blue pair that you haven’t seen in what feels like ages, you’re helpless to prevent a heartfelt, authentic smile from spreading across your face and you surprise all three of you in the process. Forcibly tearing yourself away after a lingering moment, you distractedly impart an apology to Mint as you give both of them a small nod and slowly continue making your way onto the boardwalk. 

Exhaling shakily wearing a delayed, massive grin, Logan hastily looks to Haru, hoping that he can decode what your unexpected encounter meant. Just as mystified as he is by your cordial demeanor, Haru simply chuckles and nudges him forward, “Peach… I think she might’ve said hi to us, Logan.” 

Having concluded your rather stressful tour after spending a bit more time meandering around the oasis, while you lead the group to the train station, you encounter Logan chatting with Ernest outside of the Commerce Guild. Raising an eyebrow at them suspiciously, you start to look away, but Logan opportunely glances in your direction and freezes, pulling Ernest’s attention as well. Getting exceptionally excited at the proximity of Musa, Ernest quickly makes his way over to intercept you and Logan hesitantly follows, “Builder, Mr. Musa! So great to see you both. You wouldn’t happen to have a moment to spare, would you? I have a bunch of questions that I wasn’t able to ask–”

Discerning with a rush of alarm where Ernest’s casual gabbing is headed, your eyes widen at the implication and you speedily interject on Musa’s behalf, “ah, n-no I’m very sorry, Ernest. Musa and his team are unfortunately on their way to the Northern Development projects, their train should be here any minute now. I’m afraid that there just isn’t time in his schedule for an impromptu interview. We went longer than we were supposed to with the more remote leg of the tour this morning as it is.” 

You notice Logan raises his eyebrows a little at your quick thinking as he covertly concentrates on you in an effort to deduce what he can from your previous interaction. Mitigating the tension, you glance at him fleetingly and give him a once over, hoping to do the very same after not seeing him for so long.

Grateful for your intervention, Musa nods and politely extends his hand to shake Ernest’s first, “yes, apologies. Perhaps we can work something out for another time, and…” he turns curiously to Logan and smiles when he realizes who he is, “you must be Logan, Howlett’s boy. So good to finally meet you. When I heard that you were going to be released today I was hoping to cross paths. You should know that the Builder here speaks quite highly of you, it sounds like you’ve done an exceptional job protecting Sandrock. The extension of your actions means that I would like to personally thank you on behalf of the Free Cities as well. Unravelling the Duvos plot undoubtedly saved a lot of innocent lives.”

Trying to play it cool given Musa’s remark and your nerve-racking presence and apparent praise, Logan vehemently reciprocates his handshake, “oh, well… that’s… that’s mighty kind of you, t-thank you, sir, but I… I was just doin’ what my Pa would’ve wanted me to. Did, uhm… did you know ‘im?”

Musa smiles a bit wider at Logan’s candidness, “sorry, son. I’m afraid I didn’t. Though, much like you, his reputation preceded him. It’s a shame what happened, I always hoped that I would’ve had the chance. From what I’ve heard, it seems like he was quite deserving of his legend.” 

Logan nods and subtly averts his gaze as he retreats a step to open the circle between your small cluster once more. Unable to hide your concern, knowing that he was eager to hear Musa’s opinion of his father and was readily disheartened by the blatant reminder of his absence, you observe Logan’s subdued expression sadly and despite your desire to maintain your distance from him, you find yourself determined to exude a sense of comfort. 

Tactful in preventing the dialogue from remaining on an unpleasant topic, Musa smiles warmly at you, “it is truly a pity that you’re unable to join us, Builder. I think that you’d have a wonderful time seeing the Northern Development projects in person. I was looking forward to your insight on the progress up there. Not that I needed any more convincing to try and persuade you to take one of their job openings, but after seeing what you’ve managed to accomplish in just one week, I find it even more regrettable that you’re turning it down.” He chuckles a little and shrugs, “it also sounds like I’m not the only one who has failed to change your mind. Rumor has it that Commander Avery already tried. He’s a rather difficult man to impress, it appears he and I are alike in that way. We certainly know what talent looks like when we see it.” Looping the boys back in, Musa queryingly glances at Ernest and Logan, “did either of you have the opportunity to meet him when he was here after the Battle of Sandrock? He’s doing tremendous work in the north for the Alliance.”  

Your heart drops into the pit of your stomach when Logan gruffly replies, “yeah, we’ve met.” 

Ah perfect, so much for being able to distance ourselves from that entire thing. And here I stupidly thought that it was going so well… as well as it could be anyway. I should’ve known.

I’ll just go ahead and consider this entire interaction my new worst nightmare. Thank you, Musa. 

When the whistle of the inbound train saves the four of you from having to continue the increasingly pedestrian conversation, you swiftly decide that the universe is indeed capable of showing mercy. 

“Looks like I need to get going, it was great to see you again.” Gently pulling you into a friendly, side armed hug, Musa gives Ernest and Logan an intent look over the top of his lowered shades as he rounds off his flattery with one final push, “in case it wasn’t clear, you two have her to thank for how far Sandrock has come. You should be proud to have arguably the best builder of your time so committed to this town. As far as the Free Cities are concerned, she is the official face of Sandrock.”

Wincing modestly at his pointed comments, you nod and force a smile after becoming more and more embarrassed by the whole ordeal, “you’re really too kind, per usual. Don’t go forgetting that we have you to thank for your support. I have no plans to leave, so I guess the Free Cities and you, my friend, will have to find another builder to take my place. Regardless, I know that you’ll do an excellent job in reporting back about how things are looking up there. From what I hear, it sounds very exciting. Some other time I’ll have to take you up on that visit.” 

Patting your shoulder congenially, Musa signals for the rest of his entourage to follow and you say goodbye to each of them as they make their way towards the train station to depart. Once they’re far enough away, without even realizing it, you exhale audibly in relief. Suddenly remembering that you were a bit rude to Ernest, you hastily circle back to his original statement, “I’m so sorry, Ernest… what were you going to say earlier?”

Ernest lifts his trusty notebook and waves it a little with a smile, “well, I just got through asking Logan here if he’d be willing to do an interview. It would’ve been fun to sit down with the big man himself, but I’ll catch him another day. I don’t suppose you could join us? I have some questions for you as well, if you have time.”

Distractedly glancing down at your watch, you tardily nod after you mentally run through your schedule and it doesn’t even click that you're agreeing to spend a chunk of uninterrupted time with Logan, “uhm… sure, yeah. I… I have some time to spare before I meet with Trudy to fill her and the team in… yeah, that works great. Lead the way.”

As Ernest starts to head towards the Blue Moon, you find yourself walking side by side with Logan. The two of you sustain an unintentionally slow pace, subconsciously driven by your shared desire to prevent the privacy of the unplanned moment from ending too soon. Though on the inside you’re both grateful for the excuse to be together, to your average onlooker and to yourselves, it’s just the contrary. Breaking the immensely awkward silence, Logan addresses you quietly, “so, you’re brushin’ elbows with the likes of Musa now? That’s real impressive, you should be proud of yourself.”

Staring ahead to avoid looking at him directly, you shrug a little. He doesn’t realize that his sincere comment is the last thing that you need to hear given your frame of mind lately and moreover, that it’s the first remark that he’s made to you since that night. Understanding that he’s benevolently trying to navigate the strain of your inescapable interaction, you let the reminder of your stress go, “thanks, but really I’m… I’m just doing my job. We’ve been friends since he agreed to fund this project in the first place. It only made sense that he came to see it in person now that we broke ground. I had to read it in the paper that he was coming… the letter that he sent didn’t get here quickly enough.” Daring yourself to glance at him, you feel a rush of anxiety when you detect the restlessness in his eyes and you immediately look away, “I-I’m… I’m glad you got to meet him… you’ve been a topic of interest for quite some time. Back when we had to convince him to believe in Sandrock, you were… uhm… well, a point of concern.”

You fall silent just as you enter the saloon and eagerly use it as an excuse to drop the sticky topic. Though there are a million, much more important, thoughts swirling in your heads that are demanding to be said outloud, neither of you say another word to each other as you sit down in your favorite booth together across from Ernest. Out of habit, you glance around to see who else is there and your nerves skyrocket when you spot Grace and Haru dumbfoundedly staring at you from the bar. As your clearly inopportune luck would have it, they are the only people there besides the three of you. Frantically looking down to avoid their bewildered gazes, you whimper under your breath and it causes Logan to curiously attempt to figure out what you’re reacting to. After noticing them as well, he inhales deeply and shifts uncomfortably in his seat. You nervously fidget with your hands below the tabletop to ease your expeditious anxieties while Ernest obliviously begins the interview. 

Presenting relatively basic questions at first, the vast majority of them pertaining to Logan, you keep quiet unless Ernest asks you something directly. You’re appreciative that so far, the topics have remained fairly neutral, mostly revolving around Logan’s bandit stint and your individual perspectives on the Battle of Sandrock; however, as he finishes taking notes on the last response that you provided, you eye Ernest warily when his facial expression shifts to one of ruminative intrigue. 

“Logan... can I ask you something personal?” Ernest delicately inquires.

“Shoot.”

“Are you... seeing anyone? Did you ever have any chance romantic encounters on the run as an outlaw?”

Of all the things to ask, Ernest… 

Devoutly maintaining your silence, it’s not difficult to surmise that you and Logan just received a swift, metaphoric punch to the gut by the anguished look on your faces. If things weren’t uncomfortable enough before, they certainly are now.

Sensing the apprehension between the two of you, Ernest tries his best to acknowledge his rather forward question, “right, right... I realize I'm kind of crossing a line here but... can you at least give me something? Something to help me get the romance right in this novel I'm working on…”

Clearing his throat softly, Logan takes the high road for both of your sakes, “I... am afraid nothing comes to mind…”

You can’t help but smirk when Ernest's probing eyes settle on you. Briefly squeezing yours shut to quell your trepidations, you selfishly dare to guide the interview-turned-interrogation in a different, more informative direction, “actually, that isn’t true, Ernest. He pushed would-be lovers away…” 

Completely caught off-guard, Logan whirls to look at you, but you don’t flinch. Smiling to himself thanks to Logan’s fretful reaction, Ernest carefully pushes things a bit further, “really now? How... how many would-be lovers exactly?”

With a shaky inhale, you try your best to appear unfazed by calling on a memory that you’re confident Logan will remember, “you should know this one, Logan… don’t be shy. What ever happened to Princess Lumi…? I thought that the two of you were rather close… or am I mistaken?” 

Thinking that he just uncovered a titillating secret, Ernest eagerly goes to make a note of your response, but gradually grows quite confused when the verity of what you said registers, “ah! Right! Right... the... mouse... princess?”

Quickly understanding that you’re doing him a favor, Logan holds in a smile and plays along appreciatively, “Lumi...? That's news to me, Builder…” 

Swept up in his reignited fervor, completely unaware of the taciturn discussion that you and Logan are having, Ernest furiously begins writing again, “ah hah, she never confessed. Likely impeded by the shame of royalty falling for the likes of the brutish bandit of common blood... fun!” He suddenly sighs and shrugs bemusedly as he sets his pen down, “but... I can't really use this in my book. The whole different species thing... eh... it's been done.”

Logan has entirely tuned out your counterpart at this point. He piously continues to stare at you and inconsolably watches as a blush creeps into your cheeks. Though you’d like to be brave enough to meet his anxious eyes, knowing that he’s undeniably begging for you to acknowledge him and the messages disguised in your aphonic banter, you refuse to look up from the table. Nothing about your brokenhearted gambit made you feel better. If anything, it was a sign that things aren’t remotely close to being absolved. 

I should've just said me. I wonder what he would've done then…

Picking up on the foreboding tension as it ramps to a new height, Ernest is quick to fumblingly excuse himself, “ah, well, I think we can about call it here. I've got enough. I'm going to get back to my desk while these ideas are fresh in my mind... bye! Thanks! And farewell!”

In the background, though they've been doing everything in their power to be respectful and ignore your conversation as they distractedly continued theirs, Grace and Haru share a worried glance after noticing that the two of you are finally alone.

“Well, you heard the man…” Logan remarks quietly after a short moment, greatly saddened that his excuse to be with you is over. 

Too overcome with dread from the idea of parting with him, you don’t move a muscle even after the doors swing closed from Ernest’s departure and by doing so, you unknowingly block Logan’s ability to leave as well. The impetuous mission that you’ve forged is already proving to be much more painful than you expected. Now that he’s done his time, you foolishly assume that he’s resolved his struggle with his conscience and you strengthlessly question if you should abandon your yielding plans altogether. Noticing that you’re lost in thought, Logan softly says your name to bring you back and you jump a little as you hurriedly slide out of the booth, “s-sorry… I’ll, I’ll get out of your way…” 

Just as you reach the edge, in his own irrational panic, Logan abruptly grabs your hand and pulls on it to force you to look at him, “w-wait…”

Exhaling shakily, you wobble to a stop and timidly meet his eyes. Searching them slowly, it takes everything in you to not fall apart and your voice faintly breaks as you whisper your intentionally stoic reply, “what, Logan?”

He gulps and reluctantly releases his hold on you, “H-Haru and I are goin’ to the hideout later to get some of our things… I… I jus’... I wanted to ask… if… if you’d like to tag along…”

With your heart seconds away from pounding out of your chest, you almost humor him, but reality sets in and you look down, solemnly shaking your head, “I… I can’t… I have that meeting with Trudy, remember?” Suddenly, the door opens behind you and you spin to see Heidi enter. She scoldingly taps her wrist and shoots you an impatient look. Gasping a little, you check your watch and realize what time it is, “oh no, I’m late… I…” looking back at Logan, you flounder slightly wearing a pained, dithery expression, “I’m sorry… really, I… I have to go…” 

Mustering the strength to mask his disappointment, Logan nods and politely answers you with a small, reassuring smile, “I get it, y-you’re busy… maybe… maybe some other time, then…” 

Taking one final look at him, you softly excuse yourself to rush to Heidi's side and just like that, you’re gone. Puffing his cheeks out as he sinks deeper into the booth bench, Logan drums his fingers against his knee and belatedly tears his eyes away from the door. Defeatedly removing his hat, he tosses it down to rub his forehead and wholeheartedly begins to wish that it was physically possible for him to disappear into the rather appealing confines of the table. 

“Damnit…” Grace mutters frustratedly.

Having ardent reciprocity for her sentiments, Haru nods and stands from the barstool to make his way over to console Logan, “I better go, I'll see you later.” 

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

“When life offers you a dream so far beyond any of your expectations, it’s not reasonable to grieve when it comes to an end.”

Stephanie Meyer, Twilight

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

Receiving Logan’s letter that informed you that he, Haru, and Andy would be moving back into his old house brought you nothing but guilt. Not only were you surprised that he sent it at all, the fact that he didn’t extend the invitation to you personally tugged at your heartstrings. You feel terrible for the way that you left things the other day and decide you need to make it clear that you’re still there for him. Pushing aside your adamancy to distance yourself, no matter how awkward or intrusive it may be to show up without his permission, you know that this monumental stepping stone is something that he will undoubtedly have an extremely hard time with. 

Even though it’s Grace’s last day in Sandrock and you’re in a rather poor headspace because of it, you choose to swing by anyway on your way over to her apartment. Knocking timidly on the partially open door after hearing muffled voices, you gently push it inwards and before you have the chance to take a single step inside, Andy tackles you into a hug once he realizes that it’s you. Chuckling a little at his unexpected excitement, you elatedly squeeze him back and shimmy a bit further into the doorway, “hey, kid… it’s been a minute, hasn’t it?”

Stopping in the middle of making a remark to Haru, Logan falters at the sight of you, but smiles and immediately tries to be welcoming to distract from his surprise, “hey there, partner. You're a little early for the housewarming party.”

Haru's eyes widen slightly and he hastily follows Logan's lead, his own startled state stemming from a place of mitigating concern, “Builder! Apologies. Having you here in this dustbowl is even less hospitable than our first encounter…”

Shaking your head as you stand there holding Andy to you with a hand securely resting on his upper back, you put on your best brave face, “no, it’s alright. I’m sorry to drop in on you unannounced like this… I know you weren’t expecting anyone yet, but I… I was on my way to see Grace and I, uhm… I wanted to stop by and see how it was going. I-I saw the door, so… do, do you need help with anything? I’m really sorry I couldn’t before… hopefully bringing everything here from the hideout went okay.”

Logan surveys you with a suspicious caution, but folds at the thought of you sticking around for a while, “sure… can always use an extra pair of hands. Grab a duster and start dustin’.”

Nodding a little as you and Logan stand there, staring at each other, he clears his throat and swiftly moves into the other room that contains Howlett’s old weapon rack. Providing you with no time to process his evasive decision, Andy grabs your hand and begins to drag you upstairs, adamantly proclaiming that he should be the one to give you a tour. You giggle at him and as you’re effectively kidnapped, you give Haru an amused look. He simply smiles back and with a shake of his head, you unanimously agree that neither of you has the heart to tell him that you’ve been here before. 

Though it’s not entirely intentional, you find yourself assisting Andy with his cleaning duties once your sightseeing is over. Glancing every so often towards Logan when he’s close enough for you to, you continue to try and read him, hoping to use each instance to make sure that he’s doing alright. Though you both create small talk where you can, nothing of substance is discussed and the two of you stay busy enough that your discomfort around one another isn't necessarily obvious, which in some ways is a very good thing.

When the upstairs is finished and the house is clean, you venture back downstairs with Andy and find Logan and Haru standing in the living room discussing something. Trailing cautiously behind Andy as you approach, you realize that they’re reminiscing, for better or worse, about a map that they drew when they were planning to liberate Howlett from his quarantine at the church. Watching Logan toss it down carelessly, you grimace when he refers to it as a piece of junk and stay a little further back.

After seeing that you’re no longer beside him, Andy turns to you and raises an eyebrow curiously, “whatcha got there, Builder?”

Panicking slightly at the premise of handing it over now that you’re worried it’ll only upset him like the map did, you shyly hold out an old, torn photo for Logan, “here, I uhm… I found this upstairs. I figured that you might want to have it.”

Gingerly collecting it from you, he smirks sadly as soon as he realizes what it is, “it's my folks... day of their wedding.”

Andy dashes closer and plants himself between you to see it for himself, “dang, your folks are foxes! Hey, anyone ever tell you you look like your Ma? And wait a sec, looks like this photo was ripped up on purpose...!”

Inhaling deeply to steady his voice, Logan nods faintly, “reckon that'd be my Pa... he was always a bit torn up himself about the whole ordeal. Never really knew my Ma so... this don't stir up much in the way of emotion for me. Though I do suppose now I'm the only one in our family still around…”

You and Haru know that he’s lying, his sorrow is written all over his face. Heedfully searching what little you can of his eyes, you quickly recognize that it isn’t your place right now to comfort him and in your stead when you stay silent, Haru interjects softly, “Logan. You yourself, on multiple occasions, have referred to us as your family…”

In his own way, Andy speedily tries to cheer Logan up as well, “yeah, c'mon! Gang's better than family, anyway! We're the family we picked ourselves!”

Setting the picture down on the table slowly, Logan nods once more and produces a small smile, “yeah, sorry fellas. Just got a little swept up there for a minute…”

It physically pains you to see him like this, but you know that it’s to be expected as he rediscovers the memories of the life he left behind and subsequently tries to find where he belongs amongst them. He quietly thanks you for saving it and meets your gaze for a lingering moment, allowing you to inspect him more attentively.

The distressing, dark shadows beneath his eyes have returned and his stubble is thicker, almost pushing into the category of a filled out five-o'clock shadow. His voice hasn’t risen past a muted version of his usual tone, sounding rather dull and distracted instead of lighthearted and warm. He even looks a little thinner, his cheekbones are slightly more pronounced and his jawline seems a bit sharper.

Pressing your eyebrows together when he looks away from you, you want more than anything to say something to make him feel better, but you simply can’t find the right words. 

Breaking up the increasingly difficult exchange as he watches it unfold, Haru appreciatively thanks you for your help and Logan promptly offers to see you out. In a moment of weakness when you reach the entry, desperate to ensure that you don’t leave without attempting to console him, you suddenly pause with a hand gently gripping the doorframe. Keeping your back to him, you turn your head ever so slightly to look over your shoulder in his direction, but maintain your despondent sightline on the ground. Inhaling softly to suppress the trepidation in your deathly sullen voice, you purse your lips together anxiously, “you should know that I… I-I didn’t come to see you because I couldn’t. I just…” you huff a little and face forwards again, continuing to stare at the floor, “I couldn’t see you like that. Not after everything and not after…” you hesitate as you collect your thoughts and your voice betrays you by cracking just loudly enough for him to notice, “w-what matters now is that you’re out… you’re home. Really, Logan, I'm… I'm happy for you. Keep your head up, okay? I know that this isn’t easy for you, but you get to focus on getting your life back on track, that’s… that’s what’s important now.” 

Feeling as though the air has been stolen from his lungs at your erroneous, well-intended explanation, he takes a step forward and adamantly shakes his head, consumed with disbelief that you’re neglecting to recognize the one thing that matters to him more: 

What about you an’ me…?

The mere sensation of him standing so close to you ignites a repressive yearning in the innermost reaches of your heart. When he doesn’t reply, you release your quelling hold on the doorframe and forcibly change the subject, “I-I should go… I’m sure you’re busy and I really need to–”

“Grace…” he blurts out with a defeated, heavy exhale, “I know.”

Crestfallen and on the verge of disrepair, vehemently torn by his desire to address your confession, Logan ultimately chooses to swallow his despondent emotions. Believing that he’ll simply bring it up at a later date when your heart isn’t as divided as it is currently from the imperative need to be present elsewhere, he outright refuses to interject himself into the fleeting opportunity that you have to spend what little time remains with your best friend. He knows just how badly this will hurt you when tomorrow morning comes and agrees to figure out what to deal with your increasingly complex situation afterwards. 

Unaware that he's doing so for your benefit, you briefly glance up at him to deliver a weak goodbye and notice right away that he won’t look at you. Perceiving his withdrawn demeanor as a sign that you’ve overstayed your welcome, you quickly depart without another word and immediately begin to regret that you clarified what you did. 

Looks like I was right after all, I guess that this is for the best…

After tomorrow, I suppose I'll have lost you both.

I… I really am sorry. 

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

“With him, life was routine; without him, life was unbearable.”

Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺

Loss, the most cruel of the trio, seizes the opportunity to become a more permanent fixture in your life, eagerly outcasting love and all of its promises.

Though you do everything in your power to prepare yourself for the morning, it isn't enough. Losing Grace was something that you knew would happen eventually when you learned the truth of her identity, and yet, with the day finally here, you have no strength left to say goodbye. Needing her now more than ever, you feel selfish for being so devastated. Her departure signifies the inevitable end of an era, taking part of you with her and moreover, a part of what makes Sandrock home. 

You spent the night together at her apartment and made the dreaded trek to the train station exceptionally early. Exchanging tear-filled farewells as you sit on one of the cold, unwelcoming benches, Grace confesses to you that she couldn’t bring herself to tell Logan and Haru the right time to see her off, claiming that it would be too hard on them as much as it would be on her. Peering past the facade that she’s maintaining, you use every remaining ounce of your courage to set aside your own fear and sorrow to build her up, turning what is undeniably a distressing moment of change into a positive. Imparting words of reassurance, you make a pact to secretly stay in touch until the time comes when you can see each other again. 

Standing perfectly still on the platform as you watch the train pull away, you muster one final smile for her and wipe the few defiant tears that cascade their way down your cheeks once she’s too far to see. Glancing sadly at Logan, Haru, Andy, and Owen as they rush after the train to at the very least wave their own goodbyes, you find yourself unable to move. While Logan and Owen try to console Andy, Haru discreetly abandons them to check on you. 

“Hey…” Haru says softly as he pivots to stand side by side with you to keep an eye on the others, stuffing his hands anxiously into his front pockets, “are you going to be okay…?”

Attempting to hide your despair by deflecting, you sniffle quietly and nod, “of course I will… I’ll, I’ll be fine. You better go make sure Andy’s alright, this is going to be really hard on him.” 

Haru doesn’t move an inch. He hasn’t been alone with you since before the trial and as he scans your face, hoping to get your pretense to splinter by openly refusing to buy into your impudent demeanor, he can’t believe how exhausted you look, how blue. Inhaling shakily when his unwavering gaze starts to dismantle your walls, you look at him and visibly swallow your emotions. Haru simply sighs and shakes his head sorrily at you, wishing more than anything that there was something he could do or say. Just when you think you’ll break, you detect a flash of white out of the corner of your eye and you panic.

“Builder, you still up for our trainin’ session today?” Justice inquires gently as he guides Truth to the edge of the platform.

Grateful for his impeccable timing and the ensuing distraction, you nod and take Justice’s hand as he helps you onto the back of Truth. Turning to Haru for a fleeting, lamentable moment, you smile and resolutely keep your eyes trained on him as you begin to move away, “you’re a good friend, Haru. No matter what, please don't forget that... I'll, I'll see you around.” 

A week goes by and silence. You've completely retreated inwards without Grace, shutting the world out in the process as you try to heal from the devastating loss of your best friend. Though it is without a doubt self-destructive to think so, her leaving feels like some form of twisted punishment. Taking your desperation for relief a step further as a result, your daily adventures quickly begin to involve pushing the limits of how far you'll go into the Eufaula in search of a meager taste of freedom. Fostering a new routine to thwart any well-intended intervention attempts, you start to disappear before sunrise and return after dark until the most anyone sees of you is when you're dropping off commissions or if they're lucky enough to catch you in passing. Eventually, finding prudent success in your evasive tactics, the humming of your machines are the only thing that proves you're still there. 

As part of his community service, Logan agreed to assist Justice with night patrols. He can’t stand sitting on his hands these days, especially after nightfall. Having done every shift so far this week, Logan has made it a habit to mix things up to keep it interesting. Working in reverse tonight, he’s passing by the train station much later than he has been and as he vigilantly wanders down the tracks, Logan spots Owen leaving your house. Eyeing him curiously while Owen casts an anxious glance towards your front door, he smiles a little when he greets him, “looks like you're helping out again.”

Logan nods and gently pulls back on Rambo’s reins, “jus’ finished checkin’ the north end of town out by Highwind Pass, figured I’d spend some time near the Shonash tonight…” he worriedly looks past Owen and furrow his eyebrows together, “h-how is she…?”

Smiling at Logan’s inability to disguise just how concerned he is in spite of his casual inflection, Owen shrugs and follows his gaze, “honestly? Not too great, pal… she’s been pretty down with Grace gone. I brought her dinner and sort of forced her to let me stay, hoping that I could cheer her up some, but she, uh… she wasn’t too interested in having company. She claimed that she needed to get to bed, says she’s got another early start in the morning, but I know that was just her way of getting me to leave.” He chuckles and smiles even wider, “h-hey, you know what? Maybe you should go over and check on her. Something tells me that she’d make an exception if you--...” Owen falters when your porch light turns off and the house goes dark. He smirks sadly and consolingly pats Rambo’s shoulder, “well, uhm… m-maybe some other night, then. See ya…” 

Exhaling defeatedly, Logan waits for a little while, bleakly searching for any signs of life in the outwardly desolate house before continuing slowly down the train tracks. Finding it odd that you’d be in bed at this hour, early start or not, he takes one final glance over his shoulder and is surprised to see you standing on your balcony. Leaning on your folded arms with a quilt wrapped around your shoulders, you’re completely lost in thought staring at the moon.

Logan can’t bring himself to look away, he hasn’t seen you since Grace left. Piously wondering what you’re thinking about as he tries to make out the hidden messages in your dimly lit features, he ultimately decides that he doesn’t want you to spot him. He refuses to disturb what appears to be a small moment of peace that you’ve managed to find on a night like tonight.

As he turns to depart, a sudden, cold rush of air washes across Logan's neck and shoulders and he grins to himself, realizing right away what caused it. He quickly looks up into the night sky and spots CoCo fluttering overhead, tilting his head at him inquisitively. Making another divebomb pass before he perches on a nearby cactus, CoCo definitively greets Logan with a small hoot. Smirking at his bold, but playful hello, Logan observes him happily as CoCo starts to preen himself. Out of all the strays in Sandrock, CoCo has always been his favorite. 

When a slightly mischievous thought pops into his mind, Logan nonchalantly guides Rambo over to him and begins to rummage through one of his rear satchels, keeping his voice low to ensure that you don’t hear him even though he’s much too far away as it is, “hey, CoCo… I know it’s been a while, but you wanna do me a big favor? Go keep ‘er company for a while, would ya?” Successfully locating what he was searching for, Logan presents a shiny scorpion in his opened palm and flashes a pleading smile as he references with his head in your direction, “this oughta be a good trade, eh boy? I’ve been savin’ it for the next time I go fishin’, but I reckon it’s rightfully yours now… here.” 

Hooting excitedly, CoCo immediately launches off of the cactus and crash lands onto Logan’s forearm to greedily gobble up his offering. Chuckling softly at how easy it was to convince him, he scoldingly shakes his head and delivers a few appreciative strokes to CoCo’s feathers. Once he finishes his snack, as instructed, CoCo glides through the darkness to plant himself on the railing beside you. It's a bit hard to see what your response is from the distance that he’s at, but when your smile inevitably appears, so does Logan’s. Satisfied that his plan seems to have worked, he lingers for a moment longer to enjoy the sight of your newly content state before he gently nudges Rambo to move on. When he feels a lone pair of curious eyes fixate on him, ones that he knows belong to you, he exhales slowly and raptly imparts a succession of yearning sentiments in his head: 

An owl for my night owl… glad somebody’s gonna be keepin’ you company tonight.

I wish it was me.

Do you…?

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

“Life is one fool thing after another whereas love is two fool things after each other.”

Oscar Wilde, The Happy Prince and Other Tales

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

A couple of days later, spring finally arrives in the Eufaula. Regardless of how much you love winter, after everything that’s happened to you and Sandrock during its stay, you’ve never been happier to say goodbye to the brumal season.

Emerging from your house at the crack of dawn, you take a deep breath in to appreciate the crisp morning and tiredly trudge towards your mailbox. Retrieving the few letters that are waiting for you, you chuckle to yourself at the top envelope, one urgently marked by Nia that presumably contains a furious reply now that you’ve filled her in with more accurate details regarding the Duvos fiasco. Distractedly flipping through the rest to see if Grace kept her promise and wrote to you as well, your pace slows and you pause just inside of your gate. Frowning as you reach the final envelope, disheartened that you haven’t heard from her yet, you jump when someone clears their throat behind you. Fretfully clutching the bundle of letters to your chest as you whirl to identify the source of the noise, you freeze when you see that it’s Logan standing before you with his arms casually draped over the top of your fence. Immediately annoyed that he managed to sneak up on you without you noticing, you narrow your eyes a little at him, but soften after realizing that you’d be fairly disappointed if he didn’t do just that. 

Caught off-guard by your reaction, he hastily dons a slightly forced smile, “hey! Got anythin' I can do to help? Sorry, didn't mean to startle ya…”

Furrowing your own eyebrows together at his strangely upbeat attitude, you smirk and quickly turn your attention elsewhere. Whistling for your pets so that you can give each of them a loving pat and send them on their way for the day, you inattentively provide him with a rather neutral reply, “you didn't, it's…” you decide to lie, throwing up a wall in the process, “it's still weird seeing you without your mask… that's all… but… that aside, you… help me…? Why?”

Maintaining his premeditated, dishonest facade, he chuckles and stands up straight, letting his fingertips gradually trail along the top of your fence until he reaches your gate. He coolly props it open with his hip and leans his weight against it, confidently folding his arms, “hah, I ain't the bandit no more. I'm jus' Logan now. I feel like I can finally face you with a sense of self respect.” Knowing that he isn’t fooling you thanks to your blank expression, he drops the act a little and tries to be more genuine, “it's nice. Comin' to see you today, an' we ain't gotta hide up in a cave…” 

What he isn’t saying is that, to put it mildly, it’s driving him to the brink of insanity that you aren’t speaking to him. Never did he imagine that this uncomfortable game of cat and mouse would result in the most painstaking standoff of his life. Resolutely determined to liberate the two of you from your afflictions, even if it’s only temporarily, he’s decided that if you’re too busy with work these days, he’ll just have to come to you and in spite of his self-assured demeanor, he’s nervous. Incredibly nervous. 

Eyeing him impatiently as your last companion trots off past him, you continue to become more and more guarded as you wait for his seemingly ever elusive point to reveal itself.

Logan unfolds his arms with a defeated sigh, “City Hall gave us the lightest punishment. A fine, an' a week in jail. I... still don't see that as enough. So, I reckon I should do some community service for the folks 'round here, it's the least I could do to earn Sandrock's forgiveness.” Once you realize where he’s going with this, you raise your eyebrows in total shock and he looks down, shrugging shyly, “anyway, what do you need me to do? Whatever you need, I'll… I'll do my best.”

Please, say yes…

After noticing just how hard he's trying to pacify you with this already uneasy scenario, you muse your delayed answer in a jesting tone to show your appreciation for this clear attempt at extending an olive branch, “hm, well… I could always use a hand.”

Watching his smile grow feels like coming up for air. You've missed seeing it, but more than anything, you've missed making it appear. Giggling a little at the absurdity you find in his unexpected request, you poke at his aberrant plans searchingly, “but, seriously… you actually want to help me?”

He chuckles and helplessly smiles even wider, scrunching his eyebrows at you curiously, “now why is that funny…? You don't think I can?”

You shrug with a nervous smirk, “no, no… it’s… it’s not that. Well, okay… maybe it is. I just… I never thought that I’d see the day when you’d offer to help me out with all of this… it's not really your thing.”

Perplexed, he tilts his head at your assumption and questions you gently, “what about the night we stayed up makin’ that basket, that don’t count…?”

Rolling your eyes that he was so quick to use that memory against you, you grin and start to walk further into your yard, motioning for him to follow with a wave of your hand, “it does, but I meant that I’ve never been able to picture you using my actual machines or venturing willfully into the mines. I, uh… I don’t really peg you as the mining type.”

Elatedly moving closer after he receives permission to do so, he expediently plants himself at your side as he begins to attentively shadow you, “try me, I’m game for anything. I-If you're too busy, I'll go and get ya whatever you need, jus’ tell me what and where… honest. If it helps you, even jus’ a little, that's… that's fine by me.”

Pausing the conversation for a brief moment as you load a couple bundles of scrap into one of your recycling machines, you provisionally use the opportunity to reflect on his recent stint of personal growth. Though you’ve been relieved to see that he’s finding his footing again after keeping a very close eye on him while he’s assisted others around town, even though you know that doing so was initially mandated by Trudy’s ruling, you’d be lying if you didn’t admit to wondering what it's all been for in his mind. His ingrained need to make amends for his past is something that he clearly can’t escape now that he’s earned his freedom. Blinded by your determination to be as removed as possible from his reintegration, it never even crosses your mind that he may have additional motives for his sudden solicitation. Worried that you’ll somehow be denying him the ability to obtain closure if you refuse, you agree to set aside your infatuated fears just this once, “alright, fine. I’ll let you help, but we need to get one thing straight first. As sweet as you're being, there is no way that I’m sending you into the mines by yourself. In fact, maybe I should ask if you’ve ever even been…?” 

Afraid that you’ll turn him away because of his answer, he timidly shakes his head. 

Slowly smiling at the idea now that the pressure of saying yes has been lifted from your subconscious, you flash him an impish look and continue on nonchalantly with your morning routine, “well then, I guess today is your lucky day.”

He smirks softly, observing your every movement with a longing expression as he belatedly murmurs his reply, “yeah, sure is…”

Genuinely intrigued by your process as you fire up your machines, Logan gradually begins to ask you questions about how they work and what they do, referencing that he never did get an official tour of your workshop like Haru did. Surprised, but delighted that he's so curious, you spend a fair bit of time mirthfully rambling through your explanations and by the end of it, when you’re ready to set out for the day, the fickle state of your hearts is the last thing on either of your minds. 

Latching your gate shut behind you as you inform Logan that you’d like to take the shortcut through the Wandering Y to get to the other side of town, the sound of an excited, trilling hoot whizzing by your head makes you stop and chuckle, “well, hi there. Is that your version of a good morning? It’s not my fault that you slept in and you’re getting a late start. You missed roll call, silly… I don’t have anything left to get today. Why don’t you go back to bed, hm?” 

Logan does his best to hide his grin and ducks a little when he receives a similar greeting, “you got CoCo helpin’ out too, huh?”

You nod as you watch CoCo do rather dizzying circles around the chestnut trees in your yard, “yeah, he just randomly started hanging out a few nights ago. I've been trying to convince him to stick around for a while now, it seems like he finally decided to… I honestly have no idea what I did to change his mind, but I can't complain. I adore that little guy. I've felt so bad seeing him all alone once X goes inside with Fang for the night that I built him a swing on my balcony and everything.”

CoCo suddenly swoops down to land on Logan's shoulder and it causes him to instantly fail at repressing his amused happiness. Overly content that his languished scheme meant more to you than he originally intended, Logan ruffles the feathers on the back of CoCo’s neck lightly with his fingertips to provide a multitude of appreciative scratches. 

Staring at the two of them in disbelief, your eyes dart suspiciously to Logan, “when did you two become such good buddies?” 

Logan smiles warmly at his solaced companion as he jumps off of him to perch on your shoulder instead, “ah, known ‘im for years… used to keep me company on them long nights.” 

As if he understood Logan’s discreet, willful remark, CoCo quickly makes himself scarce by returning to his swing in the upper corner of your balcony.

There’s no way… right?

Pensively furrowing your eyebrows together while you try to convince yourself that the other night and Logan’s comment aren’t related, that you’re imagining things, you fumble your words and involuntarily blush, “oh, I-I see… well, we… uhm, we really should get going.”

Chuckling silently to himself at your intriguing reaction, Logan is forced to take a few, hasty strides forward to try and catch up to you when you take off without him to escape his perceptive gaze, “where are we goin’ anyway...?”

“Funny enough, the Northern Plateau. I need zinc and titanium ores to finish the frames for the tunnel, there’s a really good repository up there. Better keep up, Daisy isn’t too happy if she doesn’t get her breakfast on time.”

Realizing that you’re serious when you make no effort to slow down for him, Logan speeds up and keeps quiet as he anxiously follows you.

I hope I’m not too terribly out of my element here… she’s right, I never thought I’d be doin’ this. 

After feeding Daisy her morning bucket of salted fish, you’re busily rigging up the saddle on her back. Logan gives you a wide berth of space, but curiously glances towards the basket that’s sitting next to the station. Shyly interrupting your concentration, he walks over to inspect it, “don’t suppose that we could take this…? I… well, after puttin’ all that work into it, I actually never got a chance to take it for a spin. I’m sure you probably have…”

Raising an eyebrow, you smirk and look over at him curiously, “no, I haven’t. I suppose there’s no harm in taking it…” suddenly realizing that this also saves you from experiencing a rather delicate journey up there given the stark difference in your relationship since the last time you were on Daisy together, you swiftly attempt to capitalize on your allayment from his suggestion, “and actually, we really should take it because depending on how much we get, it’ll be easier to store for the ride back.” 

He nods and smiles in relief that you didn’t find his sentimental desire to do silly. Having been consumed with your focus once more, you ask him to lend you a hand in getting the harness ready. Prudently doing so, Logan adheres to your every word and pretty soon, you’re on your way.

Once you enter the Starship Abandoned Ruins, you fight the urge to fall into your routine and you remind yourself that no matter how talented he is in other areas, Logan more than likely has no clue what to do in a place like this. In one glance, you immediately detect his anxieties and you smile in an attempt to disclose that you have no intention of leaving him stranded, “okay, first things first, we need to get you some gear. I’ll walk you through using the jetpacks here and we can cover the rest once we head in. I don’t want to be down there too long, it would be a shame to waste a day like today in the mines. Why don’t you pick one out while I sign both of us in?”

Excited by the idea of using one, Logan swiftly walks over to the array of jetpacks neatly lined up on the shelf near the station's console as you sign-in. Like a giddy little kid looking to select a shiny new toy, without realizing it, he zeros in on the most upgraded pack which just so happens to belong to you. Though you typically carry yours with you as you travel from ruin to ruin, lately you've been spending a great deal of time at the Northern Plateau, so you've started storing it here to alleviate the inconvenience of potentially forgetting it elsewhere.

Chuckling to yourself that you knew he would somehow do exactly what he did, you shake your head and grab a standard version to exchange it for yours, “alright hotshot… for your safety and the safety of that beautiful pack, I think you should take a tamer model… you don't get to try out my fancy upgraded one on your first go.”

He chuckles and shrugs sheepishly as he admires the one that you hand him instead, “be that way then. This one’ll suit me jus’ fine if we’re only searchin’ this upper level anyhow.”

Your eyes flicker to him worriedly thanks to his credulous statement, “uhm… I, I hate to be the bearer of bad news this far into our little adventure, but we… we may actually have to go down quite a few floors… I've already taken most of the materials from the upper floors, maybe down to level five or so? Zinc and titanium aren’t terribly difficult to find, but the good ores tend to be fairly deep in the sediment and they’re often near chromium, which is one of the most subterranean materials in these ruins. It’s also one that I never seem to have enough of…” you chuckle a bit harder, “and judging by that look on your face, I probably shouldn’t even tell you this, but when I’m having a rather unlucky day, I’ll sometimes go as far as level eleven before I manage to find any…”

Flashing an anxious grin, he glances towards the hallway that will take you to the main shaft, “oh… right, so we’re, uh… we’re goin’ further… guess that means we’ll be needin’ these after all…” 

Starting to feel guilty that you weren’t entirely transparent with your plans, you disguise your mounting concern in the form of a playful jest, “well, there really is a first for everything… I never thought that I’d actually witness the great bandit king get scared.” 

Hurriedly turning back to you, he scoffs timidly and tries to put on his best brave face, “I ain’t scared… I’m jus’... apprehensive.” 

You giggle under your breath and scrunch your eyebrows together lightly at his determination as you waltz over to collect a spare pickhammer for him, “ah, I see… my mistake. Please accept my sincerest apologies, your highness…” giving into your unavoidable empathy, you sigh, “Logan, seriously… we… we don’t have to do this if you aren’t okay with it, we could always–...” 

When he initiates the progression of your descent by gingerly beginning to equip his own pack after you turn around, you simply smile and follow his lead. Thinking of a way to comfort him as he adjusts his to fit, you smirk after remembering just how intimidated you once were, “I wasn’t always like this, y’know… you should've seen me when I ventured into the mine at Eufaula Salvage for the first time. Everything was going great until I got myself lost. Rocky and Mi-an warned me how daunting these caverns are if you're not familiar with how they're structured… they really can become never-ending mazes if you're not careful. I stupidly thought that I'd be fine after deciding that I had some time to kill and wanted to explore, hoping that I'd find some secret rooms or rare relics. I got too busy mining and all of a sudden, the tunnels multiplied and pretty soon, I wasn't sure which one led out.” 

Helplessly drawn to your ingrained need to appease his fretful state, you slowly move towards him and let your gaze meander across his torso as you inspect the gear now that he seems finished, “long story short, I almost had to crawl my way out because my jetpack nearly ran out of juice mid-air.” Noticing that he missed a strap, your eyes soften and you cautiously reach out to fix it, “may I…?”

Though your tale did its job in mitigating his fears now that he knows you weren’t always so fearless and he was feeling much better about the whole ordeal, Logan's breath hitches as your fingertips brush along his collarbone as you drag it to where it should be fastened.

“Relax, yakboy…” you tease him gently, almost absentmindedly, as you tighten the unsecured strap around his chest, “I won't let you fall.” 

In spite of everything, he didn't realize just how badly he's missed hearing you call him that. He was already a wreck with you this close to him, your attentive kindness reminding him of how things used to be, but now that those choice words have been spoken, he’s just about ready to crumble. When you look up at him wearing your signature, winning smile, entirely unaware of the shambles that you've so easily left him in, he can only manage to produce a distracted nod. Hanging back to compose himself as he watches you make your way down the corridor, he muses reverently at the additional, unintended meaning that he decodes in your benevolent statement: 

Would it be so bad if I did…? 

The two of you take your time to get down to the lower levels and the longer that you’re together, the more excited you are at the prospect of sharing this part of you with him. Unlike earlier this morning when you left your workshop, you’re not in a rush to accomplish anything, which is certainly not something that you allow yourself to do anymore. It violates the rigorous standard that you’ve been holding yourself to and without understanding why, you happily decide that you aren’t bothered by it. Finding himself in a similar headspace, though he’s currently at your mercy in multiple facets, Logan blissfully does everything that he’s told and to his own surprise, starts to enjoy himself more than he thought he would.

Once you successfully track down a large patch of zinc and titanium ores, you set your packs down and get to work. Instructing him to stay put while you go to a further cluster, you habitually prepare your collection basket and as you grab your pickhammer, ready to dive in, you halt mid-swing when you hear the echo of Logan’s first strike. Glancing over at him curiously as he inspects the result of his efforts, you chuckle to yourself at how by sound alone, you know that he didn’t hit the ore correctly. Grumbling that you can’t handle leaving him alone after a short moment when he does it again, you casually call out to him from across the cavern, “your swing is all wrong…”

Logan spins and chuckles confusedly, “what? It broke, didn't it...?”

Inhaling sharply to quell your desire to be too stern with your meticulous remarks because you know how absurdly particular you're being, you nod and cautiously correct him, “mhm… it sure did, but look at that little piece… you gotta…” you huff resignedly and smirk, “ugh, let me just show you.” You march over to him and gesture to the ore with the tip of your pickhammer to point out a faintly pronounced groove, one that is much more obvious to your trained eye than his, “it's just like splitting wood, except instead of going after the center, you want to aim for the weak spots. On this one, it's right around… there. Just trust me. Try it again, it'll feel different.”

Mildly amused that you're so keen on making sure that he gets it right, he decides to mess with you and intentionally misses the mark just subtly enough that it looks accidental.

You hastily clamp down on your lip to stop a defeated groan from escaping and you chuckle, gently shoving him to the side, “there's no way you missed that… just… just move.” 

Grinning to himself, he obediently retreats a few steps to watch you slice through the ore like butter. He's grateful that you're giving him advice after seeing it shatter into much cleaner fragments, but by no means is he afraid to make a fool of himself if it means keeping this little charade going. 

Shifting your attention to an intact ore, you move out of his way after pointing out where he should hit it and reference for him to give it another shot. Though he hits it where he should, he does so weakly enough to ensure that it doesn't break all the way. Oblivious to his antics, you make a perplexed face, “what is… a-are you standing wrong or something?” Hanging your head woefully at his failure when you start to find humor in it, you grin, biting your tongue, “you can shoot a damn hair off of a Rockyenaroll’s head, but you can't do this…? The jetpack tutorial I understood, but this is not something that I thought I needed to show you. Sorry, I-I guess that’s on me. Here…” 

You instruct him to take his stance again. Fulfilling your wish, Logan stands perfectly still and only his eyes follow your movements. Chewing on your bottom lip ruminatively as your gaze traces over every inch of him, you notice that he’s leaning a bit too far forward and that his arms are slightly higher than you’d like them to be. As if it was routine, you place a hand on his bicep and gently adjust his arms. Sliding your other hand to the center of his abdomen, you lightly press against it to straighten his torso. Too absorbed by your desire to set him up for success, you unconsciously grip the fabric surrounding the zipper seam of his jacket and look up satisfactorily, “there, now you… can…”

The sparks go flying.

Holding his frozen, yearning gaze, your heart leaps into your throat. As he searches your eyes, you detect his quickening pulse beneath your palm and yours begins to rival his own. When your wilfully disobedient lips softly part, he very slowly lowers his arms and without warning, the two of you are able to peer past the veil of hurt and longing between you, providing a glimpse of the truth behind your repressed, lovelorn feelings. Your body physically aches for him and as he turns to face you, you get scared. Scared to open up, scared to ruin the progress that you’ve made, scared that somehow, just maybe, the intensity in his eyes means that he still feels the same way. 

Swiftly removing your hands, you smirk and retreat from him with downcast eyes, “t-that should do it, then… go… go get me some ores, yakboy… I’ll… I’ll be over there if you need anything...”

“You're the builder, Builder…” he murmurs, timidly furrowing his eyebrows together with a gulp as he watches you walk away.

Whatever I did, I'm sorry.

Jus’ let me back in… please...

I… I can’t do this much longer without you.

You both work through the remainder of the morning and into the early afternoon in isolation after that. Stealing poignant glances of each other as you meander throughout the cavern, jumping from pocket to pocket of resources, you’re too consumed by your respective, despondent thoughts to realize that you could be spending this time together. Thinking that you’re being diligent rather than foolhardy, it’s easier to pretend that nothing's wrong and use this juncture to come up with reasons to justify the continuation of your irrational, protective plans instead of doing what should have been done from the very beginning – talking it through.

There is an upside to this ridiculous, spurned exchange. Whether you realize it or not, your exhaustion is finally catching up to you. Just being in Logan’s proximity is providing you with enough comfort that your defensive front is withering away, banishing the mask that’s been so adeptly concealing your personal struggles along with it. No matter how nearsighted you both are to your own affections, in the span of just a few hours, Logan has decided that you’re in worse shape than he originally thought. Much like yourself, he’s been doing his best to keep an eye on you from a distance and in spite of your strained relationship, he still knows you better than anyone. 

Joining him on the ledge where you abandoned your jetpacks to take a breather, you collapse with a faint grunt on your back and adjust your pack to use it as a makeshift pillow. Smiling tiredly at him, you pull your hair off of your neck to cool off and whine playfully, hoping to lighten the mood and distract from the awkwardness that transpired when you last spoke, “Peach you work fast, I mean you beat me and I must say… you did an excellent job, yakboy. Those ore fragments look beautiful… nice, clean breaks. I guess I’m not as bad of a teacher as I thought.” 

Observing you worriedly when he notices just how worn out you are, he meditatively races against his subconscious to prevent his earnestly contrived concerns from leaving the refuge of his mind. Doing his best to convince himself that it's simply because you've had a taxing afternoon, he can't seem to shake the feeling that he should say something and the protective part of his heart grows more restless the longer he looks. Testing the verity of his pensive musing with a tenuous, probing statement, he retrieves his canteen and begins to open it, “heh, well thanks, Builder… maybe I’m finally worthy of learnin’ that secret of how you do this day in an’ day out. This ain’t easy, I’m beat.”

Laughing wearily, you shake your head and lay more intently on your back to get comfortable, “oh no… this must be another one of those bygone, bandit tricks. I don't think you could learn anything like that from me today, you pulled both of our weights and then some. I honestly couldn't have kept up with you even if I tried and you should know that I did… I-I really… I did try.”

Though he puts on a smile for you and laughs a little back, when you turn your eyes upwards to stare at the cavern's ceiling and briefly close them while you try to catch your breath, he furrows his eyebrows together tightly and busily pours some water into a cupped hand while he continues his musing.

Forcing your eyes open when he doesn't deliver a spirited rebuttal like you expected him to, you let your head listlessly fall towards him and gulp at the tremendously fulsome sight. 

I never thought that I'd be jealous of water, but… here we are.

Having lost his jacket some time ago, needing to shed the weight and rid himself of the temperature hindrance, you trace over his patchily soaked t-shirt and attentively inspect the glistening beads of sweat on his skin. Sensing the heat that's quickly rising inside of you, you exhale softly and instantly feel rather pathetic, but you can't bring yourself to look away. He heedlessly removes his hat and runs a damp hand through his hair to comb the wayward strands into place before generously applying more water to the nape of his neck. 

Light, have mercy…

Unfortunately for you, the tormenting doesn't stop there. You devotedly watch as he lifts his shirt off of his stomach to dry his forehead and when you catch a glimpse of his enticingly sculpted abdomen and lower chest, you immediately avert your now severely dilated eyes to the other side of the room. 

Okay, seriously…?! Why can't he just use his sleeve like a normal person!?

“You want some…?”

“What…?!”

Flusteredly spinning your head to look at him again, you notice that you managed to startle him just as much as he did you with that unintentionally suggestive question. Realizing what he actually meant when you notice that he's politely trying to hand you his canteen, you hastily turn away to stare as far as you possibly can into the distance to avoid looking at him, or even in his vicinity, and you shake your head through your gravely mortified reply, “nope, I-I'm good… I, uhm… I have my own, thanks...” 

Highly confused as to why his casual offer made you so nervous, he looks at you with an incredibly baffled expression, but after it belatedly dawns on him what you thought he meant when he puts the pieces together, he can't help but chuckle into the bottle as he takes a drink, “suit yourself…” 

Or don't.

Whimpering under your breath as you sit up and let your hair fall to hide your neon, blush stricken face, you distractedly grab your pack and start digging around for something. 

Though he feels a bit badly that you're so embarrassed, he's grateful that you are because it provides him with a multitude of answers to questions that he wouldn't dare ask outloud. Physically having to run his hand down the side of his cheek to get his grin to disappear, he silently chuckles a little harder and kindly changes the subject, “what’re you lookin’ for…?”

My sanity… 

“Here…” you hold out a strip of jerky with a faint, shy pout, “we worked through lunch. I know it's not much, but you should eat something.” 

Appreciatively collecting it from you, he inspects it and takes a bite, “you make this yourself?”

“Mhm-hm, I did. This batch was a rocket rooster I believe.” 

“A fittin’ end for them wily birds, always good havin’ somethin’ like this on the trail. This is good, I might have to put in a request for some if you’re willin’ to share.”

“Sure, I’d be glad to. I can only have so much of it on my own.”

“Great, thanks.”

Clearing your throat gently when the conversation dulls, you sigh discreetly to yourself. You've never once had a problem thinking of things to talk about with him, but now that you're struggling to navigate this rift between you, you're drawing a blank. Though your dismal tone momentarily slips out as a result, you do your best to divert from the taciturn atmosphere, “you’re pretty good at this... if you’re ever looking for a career change, I’d happily hire you as my assistant.” 

He smiles timidly and shakes his head, “no, I… I think I'll be leavin’ this up to the professionals, but… thanks. Good to know that I'd do a decent job if monster huntin’ ever fails me.” 

“Oh, o-of course… I-I didn’t mean it like that, sorry… obviously that’s where you belong…” looking down at your legs, you swing them a little over the edge and your falsely upbeat mood rapidly fades, “so uhm, I… I guess that's all I need. I should have more than enough to finish that last pair of frames for the tunnel. You certainly don’t have to spend the rest of your day with me, like I said earlier it would be a real shame to let this nice weather go to waste.”

Sighing so heavily that his shoulders droop, Logan frowns and looks at you sorrowfully, “you sure that there's nothin’ else I can help you with?” 

You shrug and reply detachedly, “I don't think so… I'll take all this and get back to work, I suppose.”

Not wanting to leave, especially after seeing you like this, he subtly scrambles to fill the void, “hey, I-I've been meanin’ to ask… Justice said you gave ‘em a hell of a fight the other day durin’ your sparring match. You tryin’ to get that arm of yours back into shape?”

Cracking a lopsided smile, you smirk amusedly, “hah, did he now…? No, it’s still healing, but it… it isn’t the same. Fang did a great job though, see?” You raise your sleeve to show him your scar that has taken the form of a slightly misshapen waxing crescent moon, satisfying your artful touch request. Noticing that his gaze lingers regrettably on it and his entire demeanor softens, you glance down at it as well and realize that this is the first time he’s seen it. Covering it again slowly after a small moment, you decide to give him a roguish glare to move on from the unpleasant memory, “and before you go and get any ideas, yakboy, I have no doubt in my mind that I’m still tough enough to take you on.” 

Logan suddenly chuckles again and tries his luck at creating an excuse to be with you for as long as he can, “well, Builder, that does in fact give me an idea. Tough or not, you ain’t been collectin’ much lately, have you?” 

How could you possibly know that…?

Growing suspicious that he correctly knew you’ve been limiting your resource runs because you've been taking easier commissions to give yourself a break while you focus on finishing your portion of the tunnel, you scrunch your eyebrows together tightly and question if his perceptiveness is simply a coincidence, “no, why?”

“I’ve been meanin’ to check in on Ged since Haru and I got out. Sounds like they’ve been havin’ trouble with monsters lurkin’ around their mine an’ it’s gettin’ real hard to do any sort of tradin’... I used to clear ‘em out every now and then when we were holed up at the hideout. It was part of a, uh… a little arrangement we made to keep quiet about our situation.” 

“Oh, yeah? Any clue why they’ve come back?” 

He shakes his head, “not sure, but I… I was thinkin’... it’s been a minute since I’ve been useful in my own profession an’... well, it’d be nice to keep in line with the cause of givin’ back. Plus, what better community service can I do than pickin’ up our star builder for the day? You need a break an’ probably could make good use of ‘em. Saves you from scavengin’ for some of them harder to acquire materials an’, who knows? You might jus’ have some fun too… c’mon, whaddya say?” 

You’re speechless. Inviting you into in his world makes you wonder if he’s okay with you being in it. He’s never done that before. You assumed that he was merely informing you of what he was going to do with the remainder of his day, you never expected that he’d want you to tag along. Slowly grinning ear to ear as his request sinks in, producing the biggest smile that you have in quite some time, you look down bashfully and nod, “s-sure… I’d love to come with you.” 

Why was it so easy to make you smile like that jus’ now? I only asked you if you'd… 

No… it can't be. It can't be that simple. 

Can it…?

Extending his hand to help you to your feet once he stands, Logan teasingly remarks wearing a grin that rivals your own, “well, we better get movin’ then.”

Wandering leisurely down the train tracks together towards your house once it’s all said and done just as the sun is beginning to set, you and Logan are thoroughly lost in conversation. The latter half of your day felt like second nature to each of you, teeming with excitement and promise. As was his intention when he set out on his mission this morning to rid the two of you of your burdens, he’s almost euphoric that he was successful and the only downside that he can see is that it’s ending.

Fulfilled beyond measure as you reach your gate and stow the plethora of resources that you accumulated in a storage bin just inside your fence, you flit a little in place to drum up the courage to put yourself out on a limb, “you sure you don't want to stay and relax for a while? Can I at least get you a drink or something to repay you…?”

Huffing softly to himself, feeling rather defeated that he has to turn you down because no part of him wants to, he faintly shakes his head and subconsciously takes a few steps closer to you even though his reply indicates that he should be doing the exact opposite, “nah, I… I really can't. Andy's gotta eat, he gets real snappy when he's hungry, an' I don't wanna push all that on Haru. Takin’ turns with that kid is the only thing keepin’ us sane.”

Inadvertently moving a bit closer yourself, situating you just an arms length away from each other, you chuckle a little and nod, “say no more, I remember what it was like when it was just me and he’d stay…” pausing briefly as you slowly search his eyes, you inhale sharply and force yourself to look down to refrain from disclosing your wistful, besotted thoughts, “listen, I really… I want to thank you for today. It would've taken me ages to mine what we did and the rest, well… the rest was fun.” 

He smirks and shrugs as his gaze wanders fondly across your every feature, his voice dangerously low and comforting, “no need to thank me, jus’ doin’ my civic duty.”

Blushing lightly as you look up again, you grin and nod once more, “well, I’ll be sure to put in a good word for you, though something tells me that I don't have to...” motioning weakly away from you with your head after a long, lingering moment, the blissful tone of your own voice partially communicates the words you aren’t saying, “say hi to the boys for me, would you?”

With a curt nod, Logan looks contently off into the distance and gently pats the top of your fence with his palm twice wearing the most heartwarming, one-sided smile, and he departs from you only after you finish exchanging your soft, melancholy goodbyes.

Nice to be with you again, yakboy… I… I've really missed you. 

You seem to be doing alright… that's good… great even.

Maybe… maybe I'll finally get some sleep tonight.

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

“Love is like the wind, you can't see it but you can feel it.”

Nicholas Sparks, A Walk to Remember

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

On occasion, life takes pity on love and lends a helping hand, reinforcing both of their influences to balance the scales when loss gets carried away.  

In the weeks that followed your intrinsically mending adventure, you and Logan unexpectedly found yourselves walking down the same path once again. Larry, the former Geegler president, made a rather dramatic reappearance in town and getting to the bottom of why required more than just the standard Civil Corps intervention. When Logan’s expertise and investigative prowess were called upon, it was abundantly gratifying to witness his defining ascension into Howlett’s role in person. The transition was subtle, so subtle in fact that you wondered if he himself even realized that the moment was significant, but it was the very first time since his return that he was asked to assist with a key incident in Sandrock’s ever complicated daily affairs.

Long gone was the bandit mask and name, a distant memory of the unforgiving past that will always dance in the shadows of his new lease on life. Proud of the man that he’s become in such a short period, one that outwardly shows the promise of the prodigal son that has been lying in wait to be harnessed, you couldn’t have been more thrilled to learn that he was also joining the proficient team executing the final leg of the “Road to Portia” project. What’s more, when Elsie specifically requested that the two of you help her lead the charge in handling the monster incursion from the recently opened tunnel, you both weren’t entirely sure how to handle the more public opportunity to be partners again, but you readily saw the potential that this fortuitous assignment could bring to aid in rectifying your estrangement.

Though the length of time that’s passed since your ludicrous, empathetic journey began has pushed well beyond the amount of time that you even knew one another before it started, your mutual pining has not once wavered and despite the fact that you managed to put aside your distance for a day, your relationship is by no means rectified. If anything, it was a reminder of what could be, but isn't. Watching from afar, ensuring just as you did before that the other was fairing well enough to get by, the lone factor that hasn’t been resolved, aside from your idiotic silence on what started it all, is how bogged down you’ve become by your toilsome duties. It’s been easier for you to ignore your own problems, including those with Logan, rather than address them out of fear that if you did, things would only get worse. Deciding to maintain your own harebrained status quo places you at risk of never seeing the upside of considering what could be if you elected to, for once, put yourself first. 

After arriving at the end of the tunnel the day you enact your mission, having successfully defeated any monsters that stood in your way, you give Elsie an enthusiastic high five and you giggle a little at the celebration that ensues. She rushes forward and skids to a stop at the edge of the cavern, hurriedly encouraging you and Logan to admire the view with her. As instructed, letting your eyes wander to take it in, you suddenly find yourself at the mercy of the elicited emotions that the desert brings you. 

“The Southern Eufaula…” Elsie says softly, just as absorbed as you. 

Logan is the last to join, taking his place by your side and he shakes his head in bewilderment, “beautiful, ain't it?”

Elsie nods, “sure is.” 

The quiet whirling of the whistles fill the silence that the three of you fall into. After Logan's satisfied that he's properly admired the scenery, he discreetly turns his attention to you. Observing you curiously out of the corner of his eye, he smiles faintly when he sees a tranquil look on your face. He hasn't seen an expression like that in quite some time and he intends to appreciate every second of it, hoping in the process to figure out how to help you keep it. 

You've mentally retreated inwards, but for an intrinsic reflection of hope. Closing your eyes for a short moment, you smirk to yourself under your breath when the wind gently whips through your hair, tossing it back and off of your shoulders. You allow a small smile to appear on your face as you knit your eyebrows together lightly, finding unexpected respite in the sensation of the breeze dancing across your skin. Seeing the vast, untouched world in front of you unexpectedly reminds you of the reason you moved to Sandrock and that this accomplishment is exactly what you've been missing, what you've been yearning to feel again. As you stare out into the desert, you find solace for the first time in months, the weight of responsibility, your name, all of it, receding the longer you look. There's something about the prospect of the future that you see shimmering in the heat off the sand, the whispers of discovery waiting for you there. Life has become mundane, but this, this is why you do it. As the ground beneath your feet begins to feel solid, you realize that you've reclaimed a piece of you that you've lost by reaching the end of this tunnel and you're grateful for the reminder of who you are. 

Reading the invisible words swirling around in your head like they're his favorite book, Logan slowly begins to smile and with a radiating warmth, he softly whispers the most comforting phrase that you've ever said to him in the hopes of fostering a similar sense of permanency for your own reflective, gratifying moment of peace, “welcome home.”

The calm, easy tone of his voice confuses you. Turning towards him curiously, simultaneously wondering why what he said to you sounds so familiar, you unexpectedly fold under the protective weight of his gentle, inviting gaze and all at once, the daunting soreness in your heart vanishes. 

Logan searches your eyes and smirks softly, raising one corner of his mouth into a friendly smile. Holding his gaze as you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear that gets blown out of place, you're abruptly reminded of a memory. Remembering that you told him long ago that Sandrock wouldn't be home to you without him, in this instance, you realize that he’s home to you too. Your mind races through everything that you've been through together, providing a flash of every emotion you've felt with him, causing you to promise yourself to figure things out because you refuse to spend another minute without him. The way he's looking at you tells you everything that you need to know and you decide that you're ready to fix things, to own up to your mistakes and to get to the bottom of where and why things went wrong. Just like that, your walls come crashing down around you. Every hesitation that you've had with him disappears, the wind carrying it all away. 

The irony of this pivotal moment is lost on you. All this time, you thought that he needed the space to find himself when in reality, it was you and now that you have, Logan is still standing right beside you.

He… he still sees… me… through all of it.

This sense of comfort… how could I forget what relying on him, no… what sharing myself with him felt like? 

I can't do this anymore. 

I need him.

I miss him. 

Does he miss me…? 

His observant eyes deftly sift their way through your jarred thoughts and he feels immense relief after he sees you reach your liberating conclusion. He watches your entire body relax and right then, he knows that for whatever reason, this brief, probing exchange has caused you to render yourself defenseless. Detecting that the impenetrable walls that you've worked so hard to keep standing have finally fallen, he jumps at the chance to take the first step forward in fixing your splintered relationship. He's been patiently waiting for your permission and now that he has it, he's more than ready to rekindle that diminished, azure blue flame. 

Overwhelmed by your now grounded, heavy heart, you're far too focused on Logan's restless facial expressions to notice that the tears have started to form and are quickly beginning to blur your vision. Desperately wanting an answer to your silent questions, you hold your breath when he opens his mouth to speak, but seemingly out of nowhere, Elsie unintentionally interjects herself into the moment and shatters the yearning tension between you.

“I can almost see Portia from here…” she remarks with an oblivious, amused chuckle.

Logan's eyes flicker over the top of you to her and his voice goes slightly flat in defeat, “Else, that's gotta be 2-300 leagues from here, behind another mountain range to boot.”

“Pfft,” she waves her hand and giggles a little as she turns towards the two of you, “I have good eyesight. Anyway, better head on back and tell the Mayor.” 

He groans faintly under his breath from the interruption and glances back at you to seek your approval. Taking your sweet time to leave the safety of his eyes, you nod and slowly begin to follow Elsie. Letting her move a bit farther ahead as you walk side by side together, though no words are spoken, the two of you notice that there is a palpable difference between you. It feels vulnerable, but intimate. Meekly untroubled and tenderhearted, you decide to be brave and open yourself up to the possibilities that you've so dearly missed, narrowly beating Logan from doing the very same.

“H-hey, Logan?”

“Hm…?”

“Do you think, maybe… do you… do you want to hang out tomorrow? I've been hoping that you could show me Sandrock the way we said you could… y'know, the way we talked about back then. I-I know it's been… a while… it's okay if you… don't… remember…”

“Y-Yeah, ‘course I remember… I'd, I'd like that.”

“Great, uhm… d-does sometime tomorrow afternoon work…?” 

“Sure. I'll, uh… I'll meet ya at your place.” 

“Okay, I'll… I'll wait for you.” 

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

Chapter Text

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

As quickly as the relief came, it's gone again. The presumptive news of Grace's death sends you over the edge and launches you right back into your downward spiral the next day.

Every positive thought you reclaimed yesterday following your vulnerable decision to move forward with Logan has been displaced. Putting the two together, that her letters have stopped and this article came out, you're fairly certain that something happened to her. Convincing yourself you're being punished somehow, that all of this is a cruel message from the universe that you're doing something wrong and that you’re a fool for even thinking that you'd made progress, you despondently welcome the misery in your heart and the hopelessness that returns. 

Haru just so happened to wander into the square and witnessed Heidi delivering the news to you. Having already heard it himself, he swiftly decided that he couldn't in good conscience leave you alone at a time like this and decided to bring you back to their place; however, long before that, Logan was one of the first to know and has been looking for you ever since, cognizant that you’d most assuredly reach your breaking point once you found out yourself. He wanted to be the one to tell you, to be there for you during the fallout. Unbeknownst to him, you’ve been obliviously running around finishing commissions in preparation for your afternoon together, so you’ve inconveniently continued to evade each other all morning. When Haru approached you and extended his offer, it nearly destroyed you, but you held it together and as you followed him, you wondered where Logan was the entire way. 

After a little while once you arrive, the door suddenly flies open and shatters the silence in the heavy room. Haru and Andy immediately look up, but you don't move a muscle. 

“I couldn't find ‘er anywh–...”

Logan's urgency falls flat. Frozen in place at the sight of you and your heartbroken expression, he mentally drops to his knees. The myriad of consoling words that he’d like to impart get caught in his throat and he huffs weakly at his own dereliction. Out of desperation, Logan came home to recruit Haru’s assistance for his so far fruitless, panic-induced hunt after unsuccessfully finding you in any of your usual haunts.

You're so numb that you can barely manage to gather enough strength to look up from the floor. In an effort to conceal your overwhelming pain, you tightly clutch the throw pillow that’s pressed to your chest as a source of comfort and greet Logan’s anxious eyes.

Panting softly as he stares at you, utterly shocked that you’re in his house, Logan doesn’t dare move. He starts to wonder if he’s hallucinating until Haru interjects with a flat, neutral tone, “she's staying for dinner.” 

Unlocking your eyes from his, you redirect your gaze to Haru and unintentionally catch Logan off-guard for a second time when your typically cheerful voice comes out solemn and hollow, “thank you again for inviting me.”

Haru observes you sadly and nods as he stands up to excuse himself to fix dinner now that Logan's here to keep an eye on you. Quickly shooting Logan a look that screams “don't screw this up” as he passes by, Haru ascends the stairs and disappears into the kitchen. After Haru departs and he's left alone in the chair, Andy shuffles a little as he makes his way over to you, wordlessly asking if he could crawl into your lap by leaning on your knee. You smile a bit, trying to show your best brave face for his sake and move the pillow to your side as you help him get situated.

Waiting patiently until he's settled, you lovingly comb Andy's hair back and mumble into it as you deeply kiss the top of his head, “thanks, kid…”

Logan distantly watches as you wrap your arms around Andy's tiny frame and pull him closely to you. It isn't until the sound of a pan's metallic clink coming from upstairs breaks him from his entranced state that he realizes he's been holding the front door open this entire time. He slowly shuts it and releases his unyielding grip on the doorknob to take the seat that Andy and Haru vacated.

Feeling Logan's wary gaze, you correctly presume that he's unsure where to even begin, so you look over the top of Andy at him and speak quietly, “sorry you had to run around looking for me. Haru happened to find me in the middle of Heidi telling me the news. He… he very sweetly dragged me over here… said that I shouldn't be alone.” 

He restlessly removes his hat and puts it on the table between you as he stammers, “n-no… no, it's… it's alright. I'm…” he groans under his breath and forcibly remedies his nerves, “I'm glad you're here.”

Discerning the sincerity behind his flustered demeanor, you nod and smile faintly, “me too.”

When an awkward pause develops, Andy strikes up a conversation with the two of you by asking Logan if could tell him the story of how he and Haru met Grace. Logan hastily looks at you for permission and you smirk, replying with another nod, “I'd like to hear it.” 

Both of you are unexpectedly grateful for Andy's presence and suggestion because that first story easily turns into many additional ones. You perk up slightly as you listen to all of the hairbrained moments and schemes the boys got Grace involved in, most of which you had never heard before. Even after Haru finishes dinner and returns with another chair for himself, the dialogue continues and gradually becomes accompanied by lighthearted laughter rather than dispiritedness. 

Eventually, when Andy grows tired of Logan and Haru monopolizing the chatter, he turns to you and gently asks if you'd be willing to share how you met her as well. 

Inhaling shakily as you set your fork and plate down on the table, you scrunch your eyebrows together and smile nervously at him, “me? No, I… I don't think that mine would be all that entertaining. There really wasn't much to it.” 

Andy leans back into your arms and pleads wearing his most convincing pouty face, “awe, c'mon… pleaseee? It ain't as fun hearin’ the same old stuff, ‘specially cuz I was there for half of it.”

Logan and Haru shift tensely in their seats, transitioning from being relaxed to at the ready to interject if you aren't comfortable with his request. 

Smiling a bit larger when you sense their protective kindness, you briefly glance graciously up at each of them, “well… it isn't that special. I…” you smirk at how vividly you've found yourself reliving the memory in your mind as you look back down at Andy, “I had just arrived in town and Mi-an was introducing me to everyone. Come to think of it, Grace might've been in the middle of arguing with a customer when we walked in…” you chuckle and shake your head, “guess this must've been before Owen curbed that side of her… at least while she was on duty, anyway.”

It's difficult, but somehow talking about Grace calms you down. There's a part of you, an incredibly hopeful part, that doesn't believe that she's gone and when you finish your tale, you decide to confess to them that you were still in contact with her until recently. Heavy heartedly assuaging their baffled expressions, you convey to them that she never mentioned anything to you other than the fact that she was fine and busily adjusting to her old way of life.

While Haru and Andy proceed with a barrage of questions, which you do your best to answer, Logan keeps a very attentive eye on you. Knowing that you're one wrong word away from falling apart, he craftily ensures that you never get to that point and pipes up when he needs to. Noticing that he's adjusting the conversation every now and then on your behalf, you find yourself becoming more and more absent in your replies because you're too busy looking at him. 

With their curiosity appeased, the discussion lulls and Andy emits a quiet yawn. You press your eyebrows together and practically whisper as you soothingly comb your fingers through his hair, “I think it's getting late…”

Andy gazes up at you sadly. He's missed you just as much as Haru and Logan have and it's written all over his face, “can’t I stay up jus’ a little bit longer…?”

Biting your lip firmly to prevent that one little glance from ruining you, fighting the small rush of tears that fill your eyes, you force a smile, “no, kid… I… I think you should get some sleep. Don’t worry, I’ll see you tomorrow… alright?” 

He nods and Logan stands to collect him from you, telling Haru that he’ll put him to bed, remarking that it’s only fair that he does so because he made dinner. Reluctantly letting go of him, you quickly peck Andy’s cheek and lock eyes with Logan once more. Furrowing his eyebrows together pensively, he lingers just long enough to incite a sense of panic. There is a subtle distance to his demeanor, a distance that after yesterday, you hoped that you’d never see again. Watching them disappear from the landing upstairs, you start to faintly hyperventilate.

“I can’t do this.”

Haru, in the process of gathering some of the dishes from the table, turns to you worriedly, “what…?”

Shaking your head adamantly, you stand and begin to back away from him, “I can’t do this. Not tonight, Haru… I just… I just can’t…” inhaling sharply, you look down, “I-I need to go… I… I don’t have the strength to hear the truth. Whatever he thinks of me can wait… right? I-I can’t bear to lose him too, so just please… please tell him I’m sorry… I’m so sorry.” 

Haru calls out after you as you spin and dash out the door. 

The moment he hears it shut, Logan is downstairs in mere seconds, intentionally skipping steps on the staircase when he realizes that he was right and you’re not there, “where’d she go?”

Haru immediately jumps in, trying to process what just happened himself while simultaneously interjecting on your behalf, “Logan, don't. I know I keep pestering you to make up with her, but let her go. Tonight… tonight really isn't the night...”

Logan's chest strenuously rises and falls from his heavy, nervous breathing as he ignores Haru’s warning and runs after you, “w-wait–!” 

Wincing as the door slams closed behind him from tugging on it a bit too hard, he hastily scans his surroundings, but gradually slows to a stop when you’re nowhere to be found.

Like a ghost, you're gone again. 

Refusing to accept your disappearance, he swiftly darts over to Rambo and starts to unhitch him, but you pipe up and Logan freezes with the reins in his hand, “if you didn't come after me I was going to tell myself that this was really over. I guess you'll always be able to surprise me, yakboy… apparently that hasn't changed.”

He fretfully spins to locate your dejected voice and quickly discovers you leaning against the side of his house with your hands folded behind your back, safely hidden in the shadows. Deeming yourself a coward for running away the moment you stepped outside, you stayed close in a last ditch effort to see if he still cared about you the way you need him to after realizing that you’re unwilling to lose him over something that now, in hindsight, seems so incredibly foolish. 

Logan tries to catch his breath as he processes your worrying statement and rehitches Rambo, “over…?” 

Smirking softly with a grim, tight-lipped smile, you shake your head and keep your anguished eyes fixated on the ground, “nothing… just… if you didn't, well… let's just say I fully intended on disappearing into the Eufaula for the rest of the night, if not longer. I was planning on taking as many yakmel milk bottles as I could carry and hope that no one found me…” your voice gets even quieter and sounds as rattled as you are, “it doesn't seem like it would matter much to anyone anyway.”

Anxiously glancing towards the door, he flits a little in place and pleads with a newfound urgency, “why… why're you runnin’ off…? C'mon, y-you should… come back inside, so we can figure this out. I-I should've said somethin’ ages ago… I can't… w-we can't keep goin' on like this… it ain't good, f-for either of us.”

“Oh, Logan… you aren't responsible for me or my happiness, but…” you move your hands in front of you as you fidget with them, causing him to notice how badly they're shaking, “my life would be a lot happier if you were in it.”

He replies cautiously as he tries to evaluate you, wanting to avoid upsetting you any further until he understands exactly where you’re going with this, “I-I am… though, i-if I'm bein’ honest, lately it's… it's felt like you didn't want me around.”

You exhale sharply and nod wearing a now uneasy, larger smile, “yeah, I suppose that's probably how it's seemed.” Following a small pause to prepare yourself to disclose your haggard, confronting thoughts, you sigh bleakly, “how did we end up like this…?”

Deciding to not provide you with an answer after realizing that you weren't really asking him for one, he nervously waits for you to continue. 

“It's funny, really. Remember when you came to my workshop after you got out… how you showed up out of the blue and just… whisked me away? I should've told you then that that was the nicest day I've had in so long. It… it felt like things were normal again and all we did was spend the day together. That's what I find so funny, it miraculously seemed like nothing was ever wrong… not with me, not with… us… but I… I honestly couldn't bring myself to enjoy it the way I wanted to because I was terrified that once it ended, you were going to disappear. I mean sure we talked and it was fun, but it wasn't the same. It hasn't been for a while, has it? I-I was hoping that today could’ve been better, except we… we never got that far.”

Logan nods with a solemn frown, “yeah, it was fun… an’ you're right... it's, uh… been a while since either of us had a good distraction, but I… I didn't disappear… you… well, you did.”

Your blood pressure spikes from his evasive dig and you get slightly annoyed, “no, actually I didn't. I spoke to you every time we saw each other, before and after that. It was your silence on the other hand that made me believe you weren't even remotely bothered by me not being around. It… it felt like I didn't matter to you anymore.” Huffing lightly, your tongue lashes out with a mind of its own as it thoughtlessly delivers a scornful remark, “you didn't seem to be too happy with me after that whole soldier debacle.”

He scoffs and furrows his eyebrows together uncomfortably, “I was wonderin’ if that was ever gonna be brought up. Look, I wanted to say somethin’... I-I was flattered an’ I was gonna tell ya how sorry I was for ruinin’ your night, but you… you were more interested in talkin’ to him. The truth is, I… I saw you later on leavin’ the Civil Corps together an’ you seemed jus’ fine then, waltzin’ around town like nothin’ ever happened. The next mornin’ I chose not to bring it up, I-I left it alone… figured it was jus’ water under the bridge…” he gestures defeatedly as he rubs the back of his neck, “I… I didn't realize that it bothered you that much… o-or that you weren't gonna say anythin’ either… never imagined that we'd pretty much… stop talkin’... altogether…” 

Resentfully raising your voice after being reminded of his childish jealousy, you let your eyes finally leave the ground to flicker irritatedly to him, “oh, that's rich… is that really what you think? So this is all my fault according to you? I was supposed to say something but you weren't? Maybe if it bothered you so much seeing me with him you could've said something the moment he left. In case you forgot, I was standing right next to you when that airship took off, Logan.” You abruptly push off of the house and stand a bit taller, casting him an obstinate glare, “and, even though I swore I'd take this to my grave, you should know that I went to see Pen that night. I knew that I could never ask you to come with me because of what he did to Howlett, so I asked Avery to be my support instead. Honestly, I almost didn't go at all for the sake of not upsetting you, but it was my last chance.” 

Pressing on to get everything out into the open, you don’t even take a breath between your sentences, “and for the record, the entire time after we left the Civil Corps I couldn't shut up about you. Is it… is it so unreasonable that I might've found some comfort in talking to someone outside of Sandrock for a change? All the baggage, all the drama, it was just gone at the drop of a hat… is that so hard to accept?”

Logan looks away to avoid your prodding gaze now that he knows the truth, seemingly searching the dirt for answers, “it isn't… it… it wasn't… y-you… you could've told me… y-you should've told me.”

“See, that's the thing,” you begin to lose control of your already unchecked emotions, your angered words stemming from a dark place of immeasurable hurt, “you were more content to maintain your silence about that night rather than taking even one measly moment to talk about it. Need I remind you that you were the one that walked away when I tried to stop you…? I-I mean how was I supposed to feel? I wanted you to stay, I was begging you in my head to take me with you and after everything we've been through, you just… left and it… it's been awful. I went home and spent the rest of that night heartbroken, trying desperately to figure out why I apparently didn't know you the way I thought I did. Like I had somehow read all of those signs wrong and all of our time together had taught me nothing about you. Logan, I… I never imagined that you'd be so… so accepting of the distance. Instead of fighting for our friendship… f-for us and the way that things were… it seems like it's been easier for you to avoid trying to salvage any of it. You… you made me feel like the one person I might have given too much of myself to didn't want me anymore. It made my decision to give you space seem like the right call, so that's what I kept doing… but, it… it wasn't for me. Not one part of it.”

“That night, you left me and you haven't come back. Now everything feels like it’s falling apart, I-I'm falling apart and you've just… stayed away. I… I know you've noticed, I can see it in your eyes when you look at me… and yet somehow, you're still fine with it? I guess I can't rely on either of you… the two people that mean the most to me… s-she had to leave, she’s gone and Logan, you…”

You groan and get louder with a frustrated chuckle, inadvertently drifting into addressing the other problems that you have on your mind, “I give and I give and none of it seems to matter! All I ever do, day in and day out is stress myself out over what fifty things I need to do to make it through. The one constant happiness I've had since I moved here was her. This whole time I just had to march my way into the Blue Moon and help her burn another stupid omelet and things felt okay again… then we met and things changed. I thought you'd see through it, that I wouldn't have to spell it out for you just to get your attention. I-I swear to Light my life is just a walking billboard, everyone gawks at me but no one really cares enough to stop and see what's wrong…”

“Why didn't you, Logan?!” You stare at him furiously for a long moment, blinded by your emotional turmoil, not thinking twice about how hurtful anything that you're saying is or the look on his grief stricken face, “what's worse is that you didn't seem to need me! So what choice did I have but to stay away when in truth all I've wanted was you, t-to be there for you… the way that I've always been.”

Recalling yesterday's unguarded decision to bring him back into your life, you're quickly overcome with misery. Still convinced that somehow doing so is related to this cruel twist of fate, you take your distressed ramblings a step further, “do I have to exchange people now, is that it? How is it fair that I had to lose her to get you back?!” Whimpering vexedly, you dredge up petty thoughts from your time apart and unknowingly provide him with a glimpse of your feelings in the process, “I figured that whirlwind of a beginning was too good to be true anyway. I'm not from here, I wasn't who you were trying to get back home to… I'm just the local builder, right? I'm not Elsie, I'm not Owen, or Justice… I'm not who you missed. Why would you waste any more of your time on me…?!” 

“I mean honestly, Logan… what do you think that did to my heart!?”

“What do you think it did to mine?!”

Flinching at his sudden outburst, you immediately fall silent. He's never raised his voice at you, ever. Logan licks his teeth and exhales sharply, ruminating in vexation as he urgently attempts to curb his now unbridled temper. Though he sounded angry, furious even, you can see it in his eyes that there's nothing but pain.

Credulously launching into his own rant, Logan starts to pace, “I-I can't breathe, I can't breathe when I'm not with you, alright?! I screwed up, is that what you want to hear!? But this ain't jus’ on me an’ you know it. I-I’m in over my head with you! I spend all my time tryin’ to figure out how to get you back an’ it doesn't seem like I can do anythin’ right. I-I can't sleep, I can't even get through the day anymore without worryin’ myself sick, wonderin’ where you are or how you're doin’… so go on, you had your turn. Why don't you tell me now how you think I felt watchin’ the one person I actually wanted to be around j-jus’ exist without me? Like none of it ever happened?!”

He falters briefly when he notices that your blushing cheeks are shamelessly welcoming their way into the conversation. Not meaning to have said as much as he did, he realizes that it's too late to take it back and makes the swift decision to uphold his fervor, feeling that he’s compulsorily inclined to follow your lead and lay all of his more closely regarded cards on the table, “you gave everyone else the time of day, stretchin’ yourself thin for their sake, but not me, you made it clear that you couldn't be bothered if I was involved. You kept runnin’ off, blamin’ it on bein’ too busy an’... y'know what I think…? I think it's a cheap excuse an’ it’s one I'm gettin’ real tired of hearin’. All that talk, makin’ me feel like things were different… like these last two years were worth it, remember that…? Y-you're standin’ here, accusing me of not checkin’ in on you, but… jus’ once did… did you ever wonder ‘bout me?”

“I-I'm jus’ tryin’ to figure it out… I mean, d-do you have it in that head of yours that somehow I'm not relishin’ enough in the fact that I'm back, is that it…? You ain’t even around to know how I'm doin’ and you’re actin’ like you do… like you've done me some big favor by leavin’ me in the dust. Lest you forget that there are two sides to this if you wanna talk about bein’ unfair… an’ like you said, after everythin’ we've been through… has it really not clicked yet that maybe I'm strugglin’ with it all, that I'm not put back together like you apparently think I am? Y-you washed your hands of me an’ left me like I was jus’ another one of them tasks that you'd checked off. You turned me loose into a life that I didn't recognize, one that you're at the center of, whether you realize it or not… h-how ‘bout this, why don't you tell me what comes next since I can't seem to figure it out? Can you at least give me that? Where do we go from here, hm? Or am I askin’ for too much of your time?!” 

Beginning to talk to himself in some aspects more than he is to you, Logan huffs uneasily, “guess I really am too good at pretendin’, actin’ like I haven't been bothered by bein’ constantly reminded that things will never be the same. Sure, I got Haru an’ Andy, but I thought… I thought I had you too. You're right, we aren’t responsible for each other’s happiness, but look at us. What a fool I must be, what fools we both must be to think that we’ll ever be happy apart. We… we closed that chapter of our lives the day of that damn awards ceremony an’ the first thing you did was write me off! Y-you were the one thing I was lookin’ forward to when I got outta that cell… I… I spent so much time makin’ my peace with the past, I was finally ready to put it behind me and start over with you, but you… you ju–” 

“Logan, I-I… I didn't mean to!!”

“Yeah, well, I didn't either!!”

The two of you stand there panting at each other as the gravity of your inflamed words sinks in. 

“W-why didn't you tell me… why didn't you come to me? I would've been there for you in a heartbeat… you know that. At least, I thought you did. I just… I wanted you to have the chance to do it your way, Logan… t-this is your life… I didn't want to burden you with mine. If you haven't noticed, I'm treading water most days. I can barely be responsible for myself.” You sigh sadly and unintentionally give him another hint of how you really feel, “I-I was scared, I couldn't bear the thought of disappointing you, for not giving you every piece of myself the way I've been wanting to, that… that’s what wouldn't have been fair, not to either of us.” 

Logan hesitates after picking up on your subliminal comment and waits for a moment to see if you're waiting for him to address it, but when you provide him with no indication, he softens and redirects himself to answer the true topic at hand, “I didn't know how… reachin’ the most wanted woman in the Free Cities is provin’ to be real difficult these days. Why would I bother you with my problems when you've got your own? Why drag you into the past with me when you've got a life, an incredible career ahead of you, one you're workin’ so hard to keep up with…? I wouldn't dare ask you to use more of your already spent energy on me…”

He exhales heavily and something in his woeful expression changes, “m-maybe I am the fool, thinkin’ that I had to wait for you to need me again, when you did an’ I should've jus’…” he suddenly looks at you with such intensity that your restless body starts to tremble, “you're right, this… this is my life, so… don't make me choose. Maybe, jus’ maybe, I… I want you in my life, the life I'm tryin’ my best to get back to… is… is that so hard to understand?” 

There they were. The words you've been longing to hear. They were supposed to serve as permission to finally surrender your heart to him and yet, out of vehement shame and guilt for the reason behind why they managed to be spoken into existence, you feel even worse now that they've left his lips.

“I'm… I'm so sorry, Logan…” you whisper, growing distant as you turn your apprehensive gaze to the ground and slowly begin to retreat from him, “you're right.”

As the impudent tears form, you sniffle quietly and beg them not to materialize, “I ruined things and, I guess… you say you want me, but y-you're probably better off without me. I don't deserve your kindness after how insensitive I've been…” you inhale shakily to try and refill your deflated lungs as your voice breaks, “I know… I know it's my own fault, I… I pushed you away. I told myself it was for your own good. I-I wanted you to have the chance to make things right the way you wanted to… I thought you didn't need me anymore, I got you here, like I promised, so I… I wanted to prove that I didn't need you either... what a lie that was…”

Returning yourself to the very spot where you began, you whimper and timidly hide your face in your hands as you lean on your side against the house, “now I'm standing here, screaming at you for being nice to me when that's all I've wanted for weeks… what's wrong with me…?”

Assuming that half the town probably heard every word of your impassioned argument, Logan looks around warily and takes a discreet step towards you, trying his best not to scare you off, “would you… would you jus’ come inside… please?” 

Unaware of his vulnerable approach, you urgently reply in a sullen, muffled voice, “no, I… I really should go. You deserve a night free of me… especially after this, a-and plus, you knew her too. Grace was our friend, not just mine. I'd understand if you wanted nothing to do with me tonight, you've done more than enough already… m-maybe tomorrow we can start fresh… we can both do better, pretend like we haven't wasted this chance and pick things up where we left off…”

Moving another careful, slightly larger stride forward, he adamantly shakes his head and whispers, “no… you ain't leavin’ my sight. I won't let you, not like this.”

Hastily looking up to search for the reason behind his unexpectedly sweet declaration, you instantly notice the subtle tears in his eyes. You gulp nervously and find that your partially blurred vision seems to expedite its crusade in filling your own eyes to the brim. Guardedly watching as he draws closer, you subconsciously let your already diminutive stature shrink in the hopes of protecting him from yourself. 

Logan sighs defeatedly, “you said… you said that you wanted me back in your life too, right? You got a mess of hurt that I've only got a fraction of on top of everythin’ else… jus’… tell me… what can I do?” 

Frantically turning away from his pacifying eyes, you feebly try to maintain your composure. When he inches a little further, you bounce your leg and bite your tongue, scrambling to distract yourself in any way that you can from the inevitable. 

“What can I do…?” Logan gently asks again when he finally reaches you. Absolutely gutted by how heartbroken you are, he's made the altruistic decision to push aside his uneasiness to be there for you. It's the one thing that he's been wanting to do since all of this began, he just didn't know how.

Feeling him beside you destroys any shred of defiance that you have left. Your watery eyes cave into the pressure they've been resisting as you rush into his arms and start crying, hard, “I don't want to be alone anymore… please, please don't leave me too…”

He swiftly envelopes your small frame and slides down the wall on his back with you, cradling you on the ground between his legs as tightly as he physically can to try and take every ounce of the hurt away. Unable to stave off the heavy tears that roll downwards and into your hair, he lowers his head to your shoulder to shield you with his hat from the world outside of his arms. He mumbles unsteadily, pulling you even closer when he feels you grasp at him for comfort, “it's alright… none of it matters now… what either of us did… I'm jus’... I'm real glad to have you back.” 

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

It feels like it's been ages since you started crying. Once your body stops trembling, you feel him tilt his head to look at you and he mumbles a soft, concerned hello. 

Clutching a now highly abused handkerchief, you smirk softly and sniffle a few times as you catch your breath, shyly trying to hide your tear stained, blotchy face, “hi…”

Logan wipes your lingering tears and the warmth of his fingertips helps ground you, his careful movements dually vanquishing your remaining fears. Unwilling to leave the safety that he’s providing you, you blubber anxiously when he retreats and nestle your head further into the crook of his neck. You cautiously glance up at him, wondering if you'll be able to tell what he's thinking, and become distressed all over again by what you discover. 

Is he crying…? 

Bashfully turning his head because you noticed, he sniffles and hopes that the darkness will prevent you from seeing him promptly blink away his tears. 

“Logan, look at me…” you quietly beg while you lift one of your hands to delicately tug on his chin, the motion serving as an unavoidable request that he return to you.

Mustering the courage to meet your gaze, he exhales shakily and follows yours with his own as you adjust your hand to soothingly rub your thumb against his jawline and then his cheek. He leans heavily into your touch and reaches up to lightly grasp your wrist, silently asking if you'd be kind enough to keep your hand there for the time being. When you manage to force a smile, doing your best to comfort him, he pants quietly to reclaim his fortitude, “can you ever forgive me?”

Unfalteringly searching his bloodshot, neon blue eyes, wanting to truly understand just how much pain you've caused him, your lip faintly starts to quiver as one of the tears that he's desperately trying to conceal slips out and onto the edge of your hand, obediently tracing its way down to your wrist and into the fabric of your sleeve. Tightening your grip on him, you gasp a little to recover your stolen breath and nerve as you furrow your eyebrows together and whisper, “only if you can forgive me…”  

Yielding to the moment's vulnerability, he shuts his eyes and rests his forehead against yours, nodding to signal his reply. Following his lead, you carefully remove your hand from his cheek and slide it to the base of his hair, holding him to you as your eyes droop closed.

When he realizes that you aren't moving away, he timidly opens his eyes. Affectionately exploring what little he can see of your features, he effectively splits himself in two. Unwavering in his commitment to repress his deepest desires with you this close to him, he knows that no good will come of acting on them tonight, not while either of you are like this. Temporarily ignoring his internal monologue, Logan decides that can't handle the rest of his body being away from yours, so he pulls you into another immovable hug and tilts his head down into your shoulder to shield you once more. Hurriedly wrapping your arms around his neck, you melt into his keen embrace with a fretful sob.

Exchanging fervent apologies in the form of sniffles and quiet whimpers, neither one of you can think about anything else other than how good it feels to be in the other's arms again and the sounds of the solemn night fade with every passing flutter of your alleviated heartbeats.

“C'mon…” Logan murmurs into your ear after a while, the sensation of his breath leaving goosebumps on your skin, “whenever you're ready… let's head in.” 

Tightening your grip on him for a moment longer, using the opportunity to collect yourself as best you can, you eventually nod and mumble that you’re ready. 

He uncrosses his ankles and arms to open himself up, allowing you to stand. Unsteady for innumerable reasons, you intentionally keep your face hidden with your hair and suddenly feel like you have weights on your body that threaten to pull you to the ground now that you don’t have him for stability. Logan gently puts a hand on your lower back in an attempt at coaxing you to move forward. When he understands that you need more support, he sighs softly and grabs your hand with his other, carting you carefully towards the door. To show your appreciation, you lace your fingers together and he quickly looks down at you, but reassuringly squeezes your hand without a second thought. 

Once you're inside and shrouded in darkness, you feel a bit more comfortable. Ever since he took your hand, you've effectively glued yourself to his side, pressing your chest against the back of his arm to stay close. As he quietly shuts the front door, you watch Logan's gaze protectively flicker to the landing upstairs, knowing that both of you would prefer it if no one else joined you in this state. When he's sure neither Haru or Andy are coming to inspect the sound of it shutting, he glances at you and whispers as he walks you further into the room to the chairs, “sit down… I'll indulge you here, okay?” 

You scrunch your eyebrows together curiously and stare at him like he just spoke to you in another language. He smirks at your confusion and lightly rubs your back to encourage you to let go, “it’s alright, I’m not goin’ far… I promise.”  

Clearly shell shocked from it all, you panic at the thought of him not being next to you. It’s annoying, but the notion almost causes you physical pain thanks to the fickle condition that you're in. Nodding as you do what he asked, you refuse to move as he walks towards the refrigerator, “... okay.”

He tries to cheer you up by playfully allowing you to decide just how many drinks you actually want to satisfy your previously isolated plan. Raising one in his hand, then two, and after he tucks numbers three, four, and five under his arm, he starts chuckling when you ask for more, “let's maybe start with these an’ see how you do…”

Managing to make you smile for a small moment, you smirk and look at him defeatedly, “if you let me have one more, I'll behave.”

Setting them all down on the table between the chairs, he chuckles a little harder and shakes his head scoldingly at the mere notion of you successfully consuming each and every one. He may not often acknowledge your tiny stature, but even he would have a hard time seeing straight after permitting this much alcohol to enter into his system. Cautiously ready to let you try, knowing that you'll be safe as long as he can keep an eye on you, he opens one and offers it to you. Latching yourself onto his side again as you take the yakmel milk from him, you muffle a faint “thank you” into the bottle and speedily drink a large amount. He watches you sadly and notices that you’re welcoming the sting of the liquor rather than being bothered by it like you usually are. 

Logan adjusts his stance ever so slightly to see if you'll follow him and you do, but subconsciously, your attention truly being held by your urgency to finish the drink to move onto another one as quickly as possible. He surveys your surroundings and smiles to himself, getting an idea. Stepping away from you after he references for you to stay put, he picks up the second chair and places it in front of the one closest to the door. Heedfully grabbing the now empty bottle out of your hand, he sets it down and instantly scoops you up, causing you to shriek softly and helplessly giggle from your surprise as he plops down into the chair with you in his lap. He reaches over to hand you your next victim, cursorily wrapping his arms around your stomach. Kicking his heels up into the other chair, he holds you closely and flashes a cheesy, winning smile.

Biting your lip to stop yourself from smiling too widely, you meet his eyes over your shoulder with a gentle glare, “you're insane…” 

He smirks and shrugs, absentmindedly rubbing a thumb against your belly button through your shirt to comfort you as he removes his hat and places it on the table, “I meant it when I said that you ain't leavin’ my sight tonight. I intend on keepin’ my word, even if I gotta hold you hostage.” 

With your insides now doing backflips, you snap out of your sadness for a moment and try to hand him the bottle, “only if you join me…” 

Revelling in the brief success of getting your normal self to return, he decides to continue on with his teasing to keep your mind occupied, “nuh-uh… I'm not fallin’ for that one. Oldest trick in the book, I ain't lettin’ go so you can escape.” 

Grinning fleetingly, you shake your head and lean heavily into him as you turn to face the door, “fine… have it your way.”

Content with the current situation that he’s created for the two of you, he chuckles heartily and reclines you both back into the cushion of the chair. Wrapping his arms around you a little bit tighter, he patiently watches as you finish all but one of your drinks and doesn’t say a word the entire time to foster the mental space that you seek. Groaning softly at the idea of having to consume the remaining bit of number six, knowing that you've assuredly passed your limit, you furrow your eyebrows together and hold the bottle above your shoulder, pleadingly looking back at him out of the corner of your eye. He smirks and lets go of you with just one arm to take it, downing the rest of it rather quickly before he places it amongst the others on the table. 

“Better?” He asks after a moment, trying his best to conceal his worry from how quiet you've been.

Sighing shakily, you timidly permit him with a more complete glimpse of your eyes to illustrate wordlessly that the sadness you feel remains as overwhelming as it was initially. Logan observes you with a pained expression, unsure what he can say or do to help. Blinking slowly, you glance warily at his arms and then the chairs as you begin to release yourself from his grasp. Reluctantly letting you go, he eyes you nervously and is genuinely concerned that you’re planning to leave. Bending over to clumsily slip off your boots, you turn back towards him and shift yourself to be beside him rather than in his lap. Gingerly lifting your legs to rest them across his as you curl them up in his lap and lay your head down on his chest, you murmur your slightly slurred answer, “better…”

Once he realizes what you're doing, he grins and he chuckles faintly to himself after hearing your unsteady voice. Pressing his eyebrows together tightly when you try to move yourself even closer, he adjusts his arms to hold you, returning one to place his hand on your upper thigh, the other securing itself around your lower back and waist.

“I'm really sorry that I yelled at you,” you whisper despondently, letting your eyes droop closed to stop the room from spinning, “and I'm… I'm so sorry that I haven't been there for you.”

Logan immediately notices that it's much harder to understand you than just seconds before, signaling to him that you're feeling the effects of your desperate choices. Dotingly moving your hair off of your neck and shoulder, he soothingly starts to run his fingertips through the ends and down your spine to get you to relax, “no, I'm the one that's sorry… you got nothin’ to be sorry for. You're angry, an’ I… well, I wouldn't be holdin’ you here like this if I was upset with you… promise. We needed to get it off our chests. That I'm not sorry for, not one bit.”

Shuddering a little as the goosebumps form, you whimper softly and nestle your entire body into his, steadfast in your desire to not be even an inch further from him than you physically have to be. You quickly realize that being this close to him is far more intoxicating than the liquor you've so greedily consumed could ever hope to be and now, under the vigilant protection of his embrace, you unexpectedly achieve a new level of infatuated, drunken bliss.

This time when you shift, Logan uses the opportunity to resituate himself so that he's a bit more flat rather than upright, making both of you even more snug. Nuzzling his forehead into the crook of the cushion to face you and monitor your expressions, he dually keeps an eye on the landing upstairs, hoping to proactively mitigate any future complications now that you’re settled. He’s been distraughtly waiting for the chance to be near you like this again, your presence and reliance on him provides an immense sense of peace, one that lulls him into an impenetrable state of calm and while he muses over how fulfilled he currently is, he absentmindedly massages the space above your knee. 

“Can you do somethin’ for me…?” He timidly whispers after a while. 

“Hm…?” You mumble, only just barely awake from how absurdly at ease you are. 

Smirking softly at your half-present response, he begins to play with your hair again to keep you that way as he carefully chooses the right words to say, “you've been… runnin’ yourself ragged… promise me… promise me that you won't try to go at it alone… you gotta start thinkin’ of yourself and stop worryin’ about everyone else, that way you don't end up so upset… I hate… I hate seein’ you like this…”  

Opening your tired eyes, you look up at him sadly with your eyebrows furrowed together and your cheek still firmly planted on his chest, “and how do you suppose I do that…?”

He inhales deeply and shakes his head, “not for me to say… ‘fraid you're the only one that'd know the answer to that, darlin’...”

With a loud gasp as your eyes go wide, you frantically sit up. Looking at him wearing an obnoxiously large grin, you grip the fabric of his jacket for balance, “w-... wait… hold on… did… did I just graduate from being called ‘Builder’?!” 

Panicking at your excitement through hearty chuckles, he nervously hushes you to lower your now incredibly awake voice, “I'll call ya whatever you want, but you gotta be quiet or you're gonna wake up the whole house…!”

On the verge of elated, tipsy tears, you pout your lip happily and giggle, “everybody always calls me ‘Builder’... I can’t believe my yakboy finally gave me my very own nickname…” 

“Focus…” he chuckles even harder as a subtle blush forms on his cheeks from the unintentional slip. As you lay down, he finds himself amazed that you so casually just called him yours and conjunctively weren’t even phased by doing so.

Giggling as quietly as your ardor allows in an effort to behave yourself, you curl up and press the bridge of your nose against his neck, “okayyyyy fiiiiine… I promiseeee I'll try… but my terms, yakboy, are that you can only call me that from now on.” 

He shakes his head with a sharp exhale, bewildered at your temperament change and demand, but in spite of his flustered state, he's helplessly grinning ear to ear as he moves to calm you once more, “alright, alright, darlin’… it's a deal.” 

Snuggling in close, you quickly pull your legs up further so that your knees are against his stomach as you make little overjoyed sounds and it’s all Logan can do to not laugh at your euphoric silliness. Just when he thinks that you've forgotten about the whole thing and he’s relaxed, you suddenly giggle and sit up once more wearing a goofy grin. Inhaling deeply as he scrunches his eyebrows together, he readies himself to use his patient servility to entertain you, “yes…?”

“Yakboy…?” 

“Darlin'?”

Your smile threatens to burst at its seams hearing him call you that again, but you shrug and become rather serious as you look down to play with his jacket’s zipper, “I… I just wanted to tell you that I was… I was going to go to the hideout tonight… I… I miss it… very much. I’ve… I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately… and… and that night… with you…” 

Trying to anticipate where you’re going with this new mental rabbit hole, he observes you worriedly, “I miss it too… an’ I’m real glad that you didn’t go all the way out there by yourself… I don’t even want to think ‘bout how you were plannin’ on gettin’ down there without Rambo.”

Hastily looking up with conviction, your deflated tone disappears as your gigantic smile returns, “well, m-maybe we should go then! C’mon yakboy!! Let’s get outta here… w-we should go enjoy the night like we used to. Oh, it would be soooo fun, whaddya say?!”

Feeling rather badly for being the voice of reason because of how happy you are at the idea, he shakes his head and sighs, “I don't think you can even stand right now, let alone go ridin’ all that way… I’m sorry, darlin’... might be best if we stay put tonight.” 

Whimpering sadly, you lay back down and your defeated voice shakes very subtly, which only makes Logan’s guilt even worse, “I wish we were there…” 

Hurriedly trying to cheer you up some, he hugs you tightly and murmurs upbeatly into your hair, “h-how ‘bout this? Why don’t you close your eyes and picture that view… hm? I-I’ll do it too, that way it’ll be like we’re there an’ then tomorrow, when you’re feelin’ better, we can go together… jus’ you and me, alright?”  

Subduedly doing as you’re told, you smirk softly and whisper after a moment, truly making the lovelorn comment to yourself more than you are to him, “I’d probably be too busy looking at you if we went tonight anyway...” 

Logan’s heart nearly jumps out of his chest at your casual, disarming remark. Following your lead, he longingly gazes up at the ceiling and wishes that he could see stars, “it… it was one of the best nights of my life. We’ll go again soon... I promise.” 

“Mine too…” you mumble tiredly and finally go quiet. 

In some aspects, moving back to Sandrock has felt like a cage to him. Living on the run for so long has taught Logan a multitude of lessons, but perhaps the most important one, the one that he carries with him daily, is the relic echo of what true freedom could be. After spending his entire life roaming the Eufaula, this new phase of it has seemingly severed that tie, but for what he considers to be an abundantly worthy reason. Glancing back down at you before closing his eyes to keep his word, he besottedly reflects on his desire that there will come a day when you’ll join him in reinstating that sense of adventure, even if it isn't as wild and dangerous as it used to be. Although, regardless of what happens, the single most upheld truth that he's come to know is that wherever you are now is home. 

You unintentionally maintain your silence for quite some time after using what little brainpower you have left to imagine your most coveted memories of that night, easily soothing yourself into a drowsy state. In spite of your mental distractions, you immediately notice when Logan's dutiful grip on you begins to slack as the arm that he has on your back drifts with a small twitch, indicating that his body is welcoming the rest that he's unwittingly succumbing to. He exhales heavily and you hear his lips part as he draws each, ensuingly lazy breath between them. Frozen in place while his hand nestles itself into the crease of your upper leg and hip, you feel his other lightly squeeze your inner thigh and his thumb subconsciously stroke it just once as it snaps into place alongside the rest of his fingers. When you eventually start to hear the very faint sounds of snoring, you roll your shut eyes with a grin and open them, joking in your head that you obviously still have some sort of innate superpower to get him to relax enough to sleep whenever you're with him, given that he always seems to have such trouble without you.

Though the thought seems incredibly selfish considering the circumstances, your mind isn't in the best or most judgmentally coherent place right now, so you're not as opposed to acting on your repressed feelings. Timidly reaching out, you lightly trace imaginary shapes with your fingertips on the back of his hand to follow the path of the raised veins beneath his skin before delicately grasping a few of his fingers. When he doesn't react, you carefully crane your head upwards to kiss his jawline. Lingering to impart a beholden message to his subconscious, you whisper longingly as your eyelashes brush closed through his stubble with contentment, “I really missed you.” 

An unexpected rush of warmth engulfs your hand as Logan collects the rest of yours in his, protectively lacing them together, and he mumbles a very sleepy response into your ear, “I missed you too.”

Smirking nervously because you were caught, you tilt your head downwards to return your cheek to his chest, “you were supposed to stay asleep…”

With a languid smile, he buries his nose into your hair and takes a deep breath as his lips dance across your forehead, “I wasn't asleep… I was jus’... restin’ my eyes…”

You giggle faintly and nod as you bring your interlocked hands to your mouth, slowly kissing every one of his knuckles, “yes, you were…”

Raising an eyebrow curiously, he opens his heavy eyes just far enough to look down at you. He smirks and teases you to make you smile like he did earlier, deciding that he could care less what you do to him, “was not…”

Giggling a little harder, you plant another, much deeper kiss on his thumb and unhurriedly trail more towards his wrist, “was too…” 

In an effort to ignore his now rapidly pounding heart, subsequently realizing just how far gone you are, he chuckles timidly and shifts to cradle you with the intent of encouraging you to sleep this off and to ensure that you remain oblivious to his newly excitable state, the gesture politely hiding how sincerely he’d like to indulge your apparent invitation, “mhm, alright… maybe I was...” 

Successfully redirecting your attention, Logan dotingly humors your every movement as you begin to fiddle with his hand without your lips. Patiently letting you stretch his fingers open to mirror yours as you press them together, he gradually relaxes as you move on to delicately making circles around his callouses and long strokes along the grooved lines of his palm. 

Enthralled by his gentleness for a short while, you suddenly pipe up and he can just barely interpret your question from the unsteadiness in your voice, “d-do you want me to leave…?”

Scrunching his eyebrows together tightly, he takes your hand and squeezes it reassuringly as he returns the two of them to his chest. Deciding to mercifully profess to you even though he knows that you probably won't remember a thing, he reverently kisses your forehead and murmurs his reply with a protective devotion, “you're not goin’ anywhere. I'd be worried sick all night without you right ‘ere. I'm not lettin’ you go, darlin’... not ever again.” 

True to your current, blissful ignorance, the impact of his statement doesn't even register as you yawn and melt into his embrace, whispering a fairly subdued reply after he quietly tells you to get some rest, “alright, yakboy… looks like you're stuck with me then.”

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

Earlier that evening, following Logan's abrupt departure, Haru had cautiously come back downstairs to retrieve the remaining dishes after he finished putting the first handful in the sink. Inconveniently, he arrived just in time to hear the final portion of your contribution to the tumultuous shouting match and though he knew that it was intruding to do so, out of loyalty to each of you, he felt responsible to see how things played out and elected to stay.

When Logan initially chased after you, Haru expected that something like this would happen. In fact, lately he's been wondering why it's taken either of you so long to reach this fundamental breaking point. Your passionate fight signified a choice, one that indicated a clear decision on both of your parts to try and salvage something that you've been independently trying to save. Aside from your incredibly challenging time apart, the presumptive news you all received today made things that much more difficult to handle and in a way, Haru is grateful that the explosive exchange occurred tonight. He agreed that if you reconciled your estrangement now, it would reduce the burden the two of you had to grapple with tomorrow.

After your voices lowered and he couldn't make out the conversation anymore, Haru respectfully disappeared upstairs and went into he and Andy’s room for the night, greatly assuaged that you seemed to have made amends.

Much later on, unable to fall back asleep from his own troubled, wandering mind, Haru submits to his restlessness. Doing his best to not disturb Andy, who is having a similarly taxing night and took quite some time to get to sleep himself, Haru quietly slips out of their room to get some water. Tiredly glancing down the hallway, he notices that Logan’s bedroom door is still open. Finding it odd that Logan would’ve simply gone back to your place tonight to keep you company after everything you’ve been through lately, he carefully sneaks over to the staircase landing and though it takes his eyes a moment to adjust as he peers into the darkness, he immediately smiles when he spots your sleeping silhouettes. Logan still has you protectively cradled in his arms with his heels stretched out in the other chair and his cheek firmly planted on the top of your head. You’re in a loose ball in his lap with your legs draped over his thighs and your head nestled into the crook of his neck.

He desperately wants to bring down a blanket to cover you both with, but he doesn’t dare risk ruining the moment. Just as he begins to walk away, a little Grace sounding voice inside of his head begs him to reconsider. Humored by his subconscious’s ironic decision to bring her into the picture at a time like this, Haru smirks to himself and mirthfully concedes for her. 

As he walks downstairs after collecting a blanket, Haru realizes that he hasn’t seen the two of you like this in months. In truth, the only instance he has was the morning he and Grace found you at the hideout. Even with everything that’s transpired between you since then, he’s quite surprised to see you this way. Your adamant secrecy of being spotted together is still a mystery to anyone that’s witnessed the most minute fraction of your unacknowledged relationship, paramountly Haru, who has been there for almost all of it. Despite the fact that he has come to know you both better than most, your perplexity never ceases to amaze him. 

You will be the last ones to realize that you should just stop messing around and be together, won't you…?

Feeling an unexpected sense of relief once he successfully covers you with the blanket, Haru starts to back away and hopes that it’s enough to put his mind to rest for the night. Intent on making himself scarce, he practically jumps out of his skin when he hears you mumble, “Haru…?” 

Spinning around, he quickly looks at Logan, watching him worriedly to ensure that he doesn’t wake up as he responds as quietly as he can, “hm…?”

Fighting your exhaustion through furrowed eyebrows and absurdly heavy blinks, you sigh frustratedly at yourself and manage to conjure enough energy to continue speaking, “I'm… in trouble… Haru…”

He smirks a little at how hard you're trying to stay awake and after noting the slur in your voice, he has his answer as to who's responsible for the empty bottle graveyard beside you, “why's that…?”

You gradually lift your head, smiling faintly at the prospect of sharing this with him, “I-I realized something tonight… something… very important.”

Anxiously glancing at Logan again now that you're moving, he raises an eyebrow and indulges your jumbled sentiments, “is that right…?”

Determined to continue on with your addled mission, you nod enthusiastically and tighten your grip around Logan's torso, “mhm-hm… and I think… I think I should finally tell him…”

Haru's heart gets caught in his throat when he starts to dissect where you're going with this. He replies leerily, not entirely sure if he wants to learn if he's right or not, “tell… him… what, exactly?”

Affectionately looking upwards as you lay your cheek down on Logan's collarbone, you exhale sedately and immediately begin to lose your battle of staying awake now that you feel the warmth of his skin on yours. Nestling your head a bit farther into the crook of his neck to get comfortable, you let your drooping eyes close and ethereally whisper your exalted confession:

“I love you, Logan.”

Just like that, you're fast asleep again. Standing there, wide-eyed and rattled as he processes through your slightly unexpected statement, Haru is cruelly allotted mere seconds to react.

Logan rouses from his sleep after he hears you say his name. Tiredly squinting down at you, he smirks softly to himself when he feels the drool patch that has formed on his shirt and is rapidly being added to. He almost drifts off as soon as he stirs, satisfied that you're alright, but he spots Haru at the last moment and glances over at him curiously. Haru freezes with an apologetic smile as Logan groggily mumbles, “what're you doin’ up so late…?” He inhales sharply to refocus himself and carefully raises a hand off of you to rub his eyes, “did… did she say somethin’... jus’ now…?”

“Uhm, I… I couldn't sleep…” Haru gulps through his stammers and does his best to cover for you, “and n-no… she… she, uh… she thanked me for the blanket, that's all… you must've heard her.”

Haru is overwhelmingly grateful when Logan simply nods and doesn't press him further. Groaning under his breath as he flinches from the unwelcome shot of pain to his neck that he receives from staying still for so long, Logan secures his grip on you as he slowly sits up, “can you help me with ‘er?”

They quietly remove the spare chair from in front of the two of you and Haru places it out of the way to provide Logan with enough room to move without distributing you. When Logan pauses to resituate you in his arms and replaces his hat, Haru smirks and whispers, referencing with his head towards the table, “did she actually finish all of those by herself?”

Logan grins and nods as he slips a hand underneath your legs to lift you off of his lap, “all but ‘bout half of one…” 

“Well…” Haru chuckles a little as he walks over to the stairs, assuming the lead, “I'm impressed.” He suddenly hesitates as he grabs the handrail, casually making a comment to subconsciously address your conversation with him more than this current one, “guess she won't remember a thing, will she?”  

What am I going to do if she does…? 

Logan glances down at you sadly with a small shrug, trying his best to mask the sullen tone of his reply, “I don't think so.” 

Deciding to rid himself of the Grace voice inside of his head for the time being to be there for his brother, Haru turns away and slowly ascends the steps, “might be best.”

As Logan heedfully follows Haru's path, he sighs defeatedly and thinks to himself:

I beg to differ…

The sensation of being carried upstairs wakes you up once more and you fretfully throw your arms around Logan's neck with a nervous whimper, genuinely fearful that he's leaving you, “don't go…” 

Logan stops in his tracks after he finds his footing and hastily adjusts his hold on you, shifting one of his hands up to support your frame near your neck. Furrowing his eyebrows together, confused by your panic, he presses his nose into your hair and mumbles soothingly, “I'm right ‘ere… it's alright.” When he notices just how fast your heart is beating with you this close, he ensures that the side of his face is completely touching yours to give you as much reassurance as he can in the hopes of appeasing you, “we're jus’ goin’ to bed, darlin’... we're almost there.” 

Floored by the intimate exchange, Haru dumbfoundedly watches as Logan walks into his room with you and gently lays you down on his bed. Though his curiosity has peaked substantially and he's baffled by seeing you behave together this way, Haru gives the two of you some privacy as he disappears into the kitchen to get the glass of water that he originally wanted. 

Once Logan has you settled and asleep, he joins Haru outside of their rooms on the landing.  

“How is she?” Haru asks nimbly to break the ice.

Logan intentionally hides his gaze from Haru's inquiring eyes, “as good as she can be.” 

“And you…?”

“What about me?”

Knowing that he needs a healthy dose of tough love, Haru shrugs and looks at him sincerely, “what are you gonna do, Logan? You wanted a second chance, here it is…” 

Logan continues to look down wearing a gravely distant expression, “it ain't that easy… a-an’ it don't matter what I think, she needed somebody tonight… if that's as much as I could do, then fine.” He momentarily turns back to you with an overwhelming sadness and he defeatedly hangs his head when he convinces himself to tear his eyes away. Leaning on his arms over the bannister, he sighs heavily and his voice cracks from how softly it comes out, “I-I just got ‘er back, Haru. I can't risk…” he pauses to collect his thoughts, rubbing his face with a quiet whimper as he briefly hides it in his hands, “I can't risk losin’ that trust, not again… s-she's right, she stepped away, but I… I should've known better… I… I know ‘er better than that. She's been hurtin’ all this time, an’ I didn't do anything to help… tonight… tonight meant fixin’ what we both broke.”

“If the two of you would've just put away your pride for five minutes you'd–,” Haru cuts himself off with an impatient groan. He stares at Logan and sighs exasperatedly, agreeing to reel in his frustrations to avoid saying what he'd really like to, “look… I'm… I'm gonna go back to bed. It's been a difficult day for all of us. Don't beat yourself up too much, okay? Go easy on yourself, for both of your sakes…”

With his face now helplessly showcasing the emotions that he refuses to confess, utterly terrified of what may happen if he does, Logan nods and finally looks up at him, “sure, but I… really, I should…” he huffs and lets his gaze wander back to you worriedly, “I'll… I'll see you in the mornin’… night.” 

After he shuts his door, Logan solemnly removes his hat and places it on the stool beside him. Taking the utmost care to approach you as quietly as he possibly can in the hopes of not waking you, he briefly hesitates and glances around the room, anxiously fidgeting with the collar of his cape as he convinces his heavy mind that it's okay to check on you. 

When you feel the mattress slack as he sits down, you wearily reach out for him and softly mumble, “I trust you… no matter what happens, I will always trust you.”

He smirks and watches you stir with a pained, loving expression, “you were supposed to stay asleep…”

Though your eyes are still cemented shut, you grin, catching onto his joke right away, “mhm… as much as I'd like to say I wasn't, well…”

Logan chuckles faintly and shakes his head a little at you, “so… you uh, you heard that, huh?”

You nod and manage to force your eyes open widely enough to find his, “I did a-and… I just… I want you to know that, selfishly, I… t-this is the happiest I've felt in weeks. I'm devastated, but you… you being here with me like this… I feel so… relieved.”

As you speak, Logan slowly becomes captivated by how vulnerable you're being. Drunk or not, he's spent so much mental energy trying to figure out a way to dismantle your seemingly impenetrable walls that he's floored you're choosing to share what he assumes are your most guarded sentiments this openly. Desperately ready to hear your truth, he refuses to remove a muscle and with a small gulp, he attentively focuses everything that he has on you. 

Your exhaustion keeps your voice low and weak, but the way you're staring into his eyes makes both of your heartbeats skyrocket as you continue to divulge your scattered convictions, “tonight I… I realized that there is nowhere else I'd rather be… I… I never want anything to come between us ever again. You mean so much to me and I…” 

Trailing off for a moment as you reach up to fix a few strands of his unkempt hair, you delicately let your fingertips touch his eyebrow scar and to his surprise, you start to smile. Curious to see what you're up to, noticing that you're clearly lost in thought, he remains perfectly still as you fondly trace over his features. Your hand slinks down to his chin and his breath hitches as you begin to lightly brush your thumb across his bottom lip. 

You waver as you let your now glossy eyes affectionately explore his, “I…”

Though he humors you, just for a second, when his mind suddenly imagines what it would feel like if your lips were to replace your fingers, Logan panics at the mounting tension and jumps up before you can finish your statement to preserve the honesty of himself and your evening, “h-hey… let's… let's get you outta those clothes… I'll let ya borrow some of mine, alright? H-hold on…” mentally scolding himself that this was the only brilliant distraction that he could come up with, he quickly goes over to the corner of the room and starts rummaging through his wardrobe. As you sit up, trying to fight your dizziness with a soft groan, he returns and hands you what he's found, “here, the pants are gonna be big on you, but it's better than bein’ uncomfortable all night… the shirt jus’ might fit, it's too small on me anymore.”

Nodding with an appreciative smile, slightly tickled by the idea, you blush and fumble your words as you wonder what to do with yourself now that the moment to say what you wanted to has passed, “t-thanks… I… uhm…” 

He smirks at your reaction and moves towards the wardrobe again, “don't worry, I… I won't look. Y-you should stay sittin’ for balance… j-jus’ to be safe.” 

Standing up to take off your pants, you chuckle frustratedly and yelp a little when you almost fall over trying to prove him wrong. He laughs softly because he knows that you immediately ignored his advice, so you hastily sit back down and grumble to play it off, “sure, yeah… I-I will.” 

Intently listening to the quiet shuffling of the bedsheets beneath you while you gradually undress yourself, Logan does his very best to not visualize with too much distinction what you look like each time he hears another article of clothing drop to the floor.

“Okay, you can look now…”  

With a nervous gulp and a swift internal warning to keep his cool, he shyly turns around to greet you.

Just as he expected, the pajama bottoms are far too tall for you. The excess fabric has completely blanketed your feet with ample room to spare and in spite of your earnest attempt at tying the drawstring as tightly as you could, they've settled quite low on your hips.

“Y-you were right,” you muse, “the shirt isn't too bad, but the pants… well…” you giggle faintly and shrug, staring at him with a genuinely happy smile. 

Devotedly watching as you raise one of your arms to tug his shirt back onto your shoulder after it slips downwards, he instantly notices that the motion exposes your stomach. Temporarily catching a glimpse of your underwear as it peeks out over the bowing waistband of the pants, Logan inhales sharply and distractedly removes his jacket to drape it over the desk chair.

“I… I guess I should change too, h-hang on…” he squeaks out, waiting patiently for you to give him the same respect and look the other way.

Flashing a cheeky, playful grin, you let your now incredibly curious gaze linger before you climb under the covers and lie down with your back to him. The small amount of sleep that you've had has alleviated a fraction of the alcohol's keen embrace, but you're still feeling its effects and are currently having an intense subconscious war with yourself to fretfully debate whether you should behave or glance in his direction. 

Temptation is a cruel mistress, you begrudgingly conclude with a defeated huff. 

Hurriedly kicking off his boots, he strips to change into another pair of pajama bottoms and a clean t-shirt. Entirely preoccupied by seeing you in his bed wearing his clothes, Logan's irrevocable hunger for you is teetering dangerously on the verge of becoming insatiable if things keep up like this. Harnessing what little rationale he has left knowing that he did this to himself, he walks over and sits down beside you, causing you to chuckle and eagerly roll onto your back to inspect him. Getting a bit handsy again when you get a good look at him, he grins and scoldingly shakes his head at you. He quickly becomes bewitched by your inebriated fascination with him, so he cautiously leans down on his elbow to be even closer, deciding to let you fiddle with his clothes and skin to your hearts content. 

Logan silently gazes at you with stars in his eyes for quite some time, all the while understanding that he has to grapple with the present struggle in his mind, one making him overcome beyond reason to act on his repressed desires. Lying there with you, he elicits as much strength as he can to refrain, reminding himself once again that this isn't the appropriate situation to confess what he's pushed aside for so long. With the way that you've been acting, he knows that these feelings still go both ways, but he doesn't realize just how much. The unavowed game you've been playing from the very start has been a true test of wills and he refuses to let either of you lose tonight; it would be unfair to you and moreover, he'd like you to remember when that moment comes, no matter how much restraint or patience it requires on his behalf. He wants to do this right, so for now, having you here is enough.

It's almost as if you're witnessing the conversation he wants to have with you play out in his head, your attentiveness picking up on each and every fleeting glimpse of his subtle, inconsolable emotions. When you see his eyes pivot and stay fixated on your lips, you mentally force your way past the soothing, will-numbing sensation of his fingertips gently combing their way through the hair on the top of your head to interrupt him, “what's wrong…?”

He shakes his head once, lying through his teeth as he fondly brushes his thumb across your eyelids to close them, though you stubbornly open your eyes right after, “nothin’… you gotta get some sleep. We can deal with it in the mornin’... there ain't no rush now.”

You scrunch your eyebrows together and delicately grab at his arm. He glances down at your hand curiously and you whisper softly to refocus him on you, “c'mere…” you watch him hesitate as he looks back at you and you plead with him, donning his favorite doe-like expression, the one you know he can't resist, “let me take care of you like I did then… you've spent far too much time taking care of me…” you bite your lip and turn your head to the side and away from him to face the window, letting your tired eyes close to prove that you'll be good, “surrender your burden, please…? Even after we've slept on it and I'm sober, I promise this time, I'm not going anywhere. I'm right here, so let me be.” 

When you adamantly tug on him again, he warily concedes as you guide him to you. He lays only his head down on your lower chest and stomach with his legs still precariously hanging off the edge of the mattress. Moving your hand slowly from his bicep, you slide it up onto his shoulder as your fingertips navigate their way into the hair at the nape of his neck. Tepidly dragging downwards and through the now untied ends once you remove his hair tie, you massage your thumb in the space where his jawline ends beneath his ear and definitively end your crusade by stroking the stubble on the edge of his cheek.   

Logan's eyes flutter closed with a peaceful, deep exhale. Permitting himself to do so, he nimbly snakes an arm across your pelvis and upper thighs and curls his hand to rest in the small divot of your hip. Though you're incredibly far gone, you break into a sleepy smile when you feel him relax and you promptly ready yourself to continue appeasing him for as long as your exhaustion allows. After a few minutes, your efforts steadily wane as you drift off and your breathing gets quite heavy, signaling that you're out for good this time. Though he's only partially on the bed, Logan decides to stay right where he is for a little while longer, realizing that even in this state, you seem to still really need him, perhaps just as much as he knows that he needs you.

Eventually, he convinces himself to leave the sanctuary of your body and cautiously sits up to properly join you. He carefully scoots over, placing himself between you and the window to shield you from intruding the light of the moon. Daring to kiss your exposed cheek, he rests his forehead on yours to remind himself that you're real and for a lingering moment, he pauses to breathe you in. The feeling of his lips causes you to mumble his name in your sleep and your hands start languidly reaching out to locate him, your subconscious noticing that he isn't where he was last. He smiles softly, gently coaxing you onto your side as he settles in behind you. Happily letting you guide his hand up to your mouth when you find it, he heedfully drapes his arm across your ribcage so that his torso is firmly pressed to your back. Protectively lacing his fingers into yours with a gentle squeeze, he repositions your hair upwards with his free hand onto the pillow before sliding his forearm beneath it and under your neck, laying down as he nuzzles his face into your skin.

Imparting an appreciative mental sequence of gratified words into the ether, he tenderly kisses the top of your spine and in short order, returns to his own blissful slumber.   

Goodnight, darlin’...

I love you.

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

Quietly making his way up the stairs, Logan smirks softly to himself when he rounds the corner and discovers you in bed curled up with a book. Though he fully expected you to be like this at this hour and he’s seen this same scene hundreds of times, he still finds exceptional humor in how oblivious you get when you’re focused. Shaking his head scoldingly with an amused smile, he props his hip against the doorframe and agrees to admire you for as long as your concentration allows. He’s been gone for a couple of days fulfilling a bounty in the deep Eufaula and by all accounts, you’re a sight for sore eyes.

As you flip to a new page, you turn to grab your bookmark off of your nightstand and spot him at the last moment in your peripheral vision. Immediately assuming that he’s been there longer than you’d care to admit, you grin bashfully, “hey, yakboy… you're home.”

Now that he's been caught, he shyly tilts his head to the side wearing a smile that rivals your own, “howdy, darlin’...”

Giggling a little with excitement, you hastily toss the book down and rush over to him, “I didn't hear you come in or I would've come downstairs! How did it go?! I hope that Bellwing Siren didn't give you too much trouble…”

He chuckles at your elation and shrugs, “nah, wasn't much trouble at all. What was though was findin’ this inside the beast once it fell…” he gently grabs your hands to cup them before he reaches inside his jacket pocket and places something small into your palms, “sorry I'm, uh… I’m a little late. I know I said I'd be home for supper, but I… I couldn't resist.”

Logan patiently trains his eyes on you, waiting to see your reaction as he removes his hand to uncover yours, revealing his surprise. It's a rather exquisite moonstone, one of such pristine quality that would only ever originate from a creature as highly prized as a Bellwing Siren. Including those that you mine for directly, any of the moonstones that you've been lucky enough to obtain from Desert Hoppers or Vipers don't come remotely close to competing with this particular fragment. You've been wanting to find one that you like for months after receiving the design from your upgraded jewelry processing machine to make a moonstone pendant for yourself, but none have been worthy of the endeavor until now. 

When you realize what it is, you gasp and instantly tackle him into a fierce hug, “oh, it’s beautiful!!!” Clambering your way further into his arms as he picks you up and begins walking back towards the bed, you wrap your legs around his torso and squeeze him as tightly as you can, imparting a profuse series of squealed “thank yous”.

He laughs and upon reaching the bed, he carefully lays you down. Unhurriedly taking you in as he leans over the top of you on his elbows, he murmurs yearningly, “Light, I missed you… did you miss me?”

“More than you know…” you whisper with a content, shaky exhale.

Abruptly tugging you closer by your hips, you giggle breathlessly when your lower bodies meld at the edge of the mattress. He smoothly rids himself of his hat and closes the remaining distance to kiss you, soft and slow. Mumbling that he should go clean up, you express your displeasure with the idea by using your thighs to staunchly grip his waist to hold him still while your hands eagerly roam across his upper back and into the hair at the nape of his neck. 

Smiling against your lips as you continue to kiss him more hungrily with each passing breath, he chuckles low and furrows his eyebrows together, “guess you did miss me…” 

You smirk and begrudgingly release him, understanding that he’d probably like to get comfortable after the long journey, but you selfishly exploit the opportunity to marvel at the details of his sunkissed skin when he doesn't move away. Staring at him lovingly as you twirl a piece of his unkempt hair above his eyebrow scar between your fingertips, your eyes widen faintly when he gets a dangerous look in his.

Without warning, he scoops you up and sits down so that you’re straddling his lap instead of lying pinned beneath him. Feverishly reacquainting himself with your lips and a myriad of your most supple physical features, you readily surrender to his implied, passionate request and as you deliver him to the bedsheets, you amorously whisper:

“I love you, Logan.”

Just as his dream begins to flourish into one of unbridled fantasy, Logan wakes up with a small start. Created from a patchwork of memories, it was a dream cultivated and meticulously woven together by his subconscious. Though he doesn’t realize it, the final memory bestowed upon his rather vivid experience was forged by your confession last night, one that is now reverently held in secret by both you and his mind. 

Forcing his tired eyes open as the image of you fades into the darkness, he's quickly solaced after realizing that the real version is fast asleep in his arms, bathed in the early morning light. Tracing his weary gaze over you with newfound contentment, he notices that you've effectively pressed every inch of yourself against him and have slipped one of your legs between his. He furrows his eyebrows together curiously when he discovers that one of his hands is securely resting on your exposed torso, a result of your late night movement that's caused the oversized shirt he lent you to ride up just below your lower chest.

Running his palm steadily across the small of your back and up to your ribs, he gradually makes slow, massaging passes and gets lost in the sensation of your bare skin against his hand. Quickly becoming lustful all over again when you nestle into him with a soft, sleepy whimper, he devotedly slips his fingertips beneath your side and carefully lifts you to tug you even closer. He irrevocably kisses your forehead and murmurs, “guess we're not in a stalemate in my dreams, are we darlin’?” Relenting with a pensive sigh, he pulls your shirt back down to your waist as you settle, “at least I know there that you love me too...” 

Deciding to get comfortable while you rest, Logan drowsily loses track of time as he watches the sun rise past you on the wall across the room and before long, the door creaks open. Peeking his head tentatively around the inner frame of it, Andy cautiously takes a few steps further inside. 

Surprised by his appearance, Logan nervously looks down at you. Realizing that there's nothing he can do about the rather complicated condition the two of you are in, he lifts his head ever so slightly to see him better over you and whispers, “it's early kid… what're you doin’ up?”

Without a word, Andy makes his way to the side of the bed and keeps his eyes fixated on you. Smiling faintly once he understands that Andy must've heard the commotion when the three of you came upstairs last night, Logan senses his worry, “she's jus’... tired. Gonna be sleepin’ for a while, got a… a lot of it to, uhm… catch up on. C'mon, you can come up… be careful you don't wake her, alright?” 

Timidly crawling onto the mattress, Andy gets a bit nervous himself. He's never been in bed with Logan before. Logan's nocturnal tendencies meant that he wasn't around much once it got dark, leaving Andy to be with Haru to remedy his nightmares or simply bunk with someone for the night. Scooting closer to you, Andy reaches out to move a few stray pieces of hair off of your cheek and begins running his fingers through the rest. It's a habit that you often do for him and he's inadvertently mirroring it to try to comfort you. He may not understand everything that transpired yesterday, but he knows that you're troubled and wants to help. 

Baffled as he observes the affectionate exchange, Logan starts to wonder when Andy became so grown up. The little kid he and Haru took in is undoubtedly still in there, but he's incredibly proud to see the person that Andy is maturing into. Manifesting an even deeper appreciation for all that you've done for him in their absence after witnessing this new layer of you and Andy's relationship, Logan fondly looks down at you once more and reminds himself to thank you for it later. 

“Did she ‘ave a bad dream or somethin’...? Was it about Grace?” Andy pipes up softly as he continues on with his soothing efforts. 

Logan shakes his head, “no, she's sleepin’ off the...” he smirks at himself for almost revealing the truth, understanding it would be rather inappropriate to do so, and clumsily decides to make a tiny white lie, “well, a-actually, sort of… we… we both did… n-not about Grace, though…”

Andy nods faintly and shifts himself to lie more intently near your head. The two of them briefly stay silent out of concern for your wellbeing, but both of their eyes widen worriedly when you suddenly start to roll onto your back and mumble, “Andy…? C'mere, kid… you… you should be asleep…”

Though your eyes never open, you successfully place a hand on Andy's shoulder and guide him downwards to situate him beneath your arm. Andy heedfully joins you, but stares anxiously at Logan the entire time. Grinning at the panicked look on Andy's face, Logan instantly loses his smile when your head slumps back towards his chest and you somehow manage to pinpoint and gently pat his cheek, “you too, you… you go back to sleep too...” 

Highly confused when it becomes apparent to them that you're miraculously still asleep, Logan catches your hand as it slowly falls against his neck while Andy scrunches his eyebrows together and asks bewilderedly, “hey wait a minute, how'd ya know it was me…?”  

When you don't respond, they take one look at each other and share a moment of quiet laughter. Logan shakes his head at you and tries to keep his voice low, “we better do what she says…” 

To avoid disturbing you too much, Logan gingerly assists Andy as he wiggles to get under the covers. Tucking him in once he does, Logan finally concedes to your request by laying back down himself. Sliding a hand across your waist to protectively hold Andy's leg and you, he emits a quiet yawn and thinks with an easy, gratified smile as his eyes droop closed:

Another hour or two can't hurt…

Later that morning when Haru comes looking for Andy after unsuccessfully finding him anywhere else in the house, he softly knocks on the partially open door. Letting himself in when there's no response, he immediately smiles at the sight of the three of you sound asleep together in a bed so full of more than just occupied space. Unbeknownst to Haru, none of you have moved a muscle. You're still on your back, Logan is on his side, practically trapped against the wall beneath the window thanks to the small bed size, and the two of you have your foreheads pressed together, sharing the lone pillow. Andy's snuggly on your other side under your arm, clutching your shirt with his head curled into your shoulder. Having learned his lesson, Haru doesn't linger. As he departs and politely shuts the door, there is a part of him that grows sad. This tranquil event is a glimpse of the future that he knows after last night is only a matter of time now. 

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

That afternoon, you wake up completely disoriented and lightheaded. Inhaling sharply with a queasy groan, you can't even muster enough strength to open your eyes, let alone lift your pounding head. In spite of your confusion, the first thing that crosses your mind is the very same thing that you think is lying beside you. Continuing to fight your sealed shut eyes, you mumble an extremely groggy, “Logan…?” and are slightly startled to hear how hoarse your voice sounds as it softly echoes into the aural silence. Though you get no reply, you're sure that he's there as you tighten your arms around what you're embracing, only to realize that it's a pillow, one that smells just like him. When you eventually win against yourself, you squint and glance around sluggishly, gradually putting together the pieces of where you are and how you must've ended up there. 

Peach, my head… ugh, that just might've been the worst idea I've ever had.

Sinking your face back into the pillow to avoid the bright afternoon sun shining through the window, you whimper wearily and shut your eyes again while you try to convince yourself that it's okay to move. Now that you know you’re in his room, you relax right away and the comfort you find in pretending that he's there with you makes you feel immensely better, both providing enough motivation to sit up and dangle your shaky legs over the edge of the bed.

Catching a glimpse of yourself once you're free from the covers, you notice that you're wearing a foreign set of clothes. You smirk apprehensively and slowly scrunch your eyebrows together while you inspect them. 

Uhm… how did that happen?

When your mind reaches a slightly concerning conclusion after realizing that they must be his, your eyes widen and you flush beet red.

W-why did that happen…?

Quickly ridding yourself of the notion that something carnal occurred when you spot your clothes neatly folded on the stool near the door along with your retrieved shoes that were abandoned in the living room, you breathe a timid sigh of relief. Grateful for the glass of water that you assume he left for you to find, you take a sip before beginning the arduous task of getting dressed.

When the world starts spinning the second you try to stand, you sit back down and bury your face in your hands to give yourself one last pep talk. Freezing with an anxious grin when you hear faint chuckling coming from the doorway, you shyly spread your fingers apart to peek at Logan through them. Though your face had become rather ashen thanks to your body's discontent with your decision to get up, the color has once again returned to your now deeply blushing cheeks. 

“Hi…” you say softly as he takes a seat on the mattress beside you, quickly busying yourself by fidgeting with your fingers in your lap to avoid looking at him. 

Logan delicately begins to smooth a slightly disheveled portion of your hair down and he smiles right along with you when you do in response. He scoldingly shakes his head and keeps his voice low, “hi there, dare I ask how you're feelin’...?”  

Embarrassed by the whole ordeal, you chuckle a little and whine under your breath. While he continues his handiwork with your hair, your flight-like tone fails to hide your nervousness, “oh, I've… I've obviously never felt better… what… what a silly question…” you pause for a brief moment when he's through and with a heavy sigh, you defeatedly put your head on his shoulder in a meager attempt at feeling even a fraction of relief, “go ahead, you can say it. I'm a moron. I feel awful and I'm a moron.”

He chuckles exceptionally harder than before and although he made a pact with himself to wait to be more affectionate with you until understands just how much of the night's events you remember, and moreover, where the two of you stand because of it, he simply can't help himself. Instantly ignoring his own advice, he slides his arm around your waist to comfort you and decides to lightly tease you, hoping that it'll cheer you up, “jury might still be out, but I'm the moron that let you so that makes two of us.”

Welcoming his embrace, you nestle more intently against his side and tuck your head a bit further into his collarbone, smiling ear to ear, “mhm, I suppose that's true. New titles seem to be in order then… and look, what luck…” you playfully tug at his shirt, “we already have matching pajamas. Apparently I'm not the only one who experienced an outfit change last night.”

He smirks and lowers his cheek to your forehead, soothingly rubbing his thumb across your hip, “it's sort of a long story, but I figured it'd be better than sleepin’ in your other clothes… a-an’ actually, I… I jus’ got up a little while ago. Needed to get Andy movin’ for the day, so I… I haven't had a chance to get ready yet myself.”

What he isn't revealing is that Andy has been gone for hours. When Logan woke up again, Andy had already left, so he simply resumed his mission of keeping you company. Refusing to leave your side in an effort to preserve that feeling for a little while longer, knowing that you’d be a mentally blank slate and that he’d have to start all over again, he occupied himself by reading Howlett’s personal journal, the one he poured over tirelessly during his time on the run. The desire to do so was a consequence of his ponderous consideration of how he should handle your evolving situation and the longer he thought about it and your complicated relationship, the more he found himself in need of his father’s wisdom. Logan only recently abandoned his unwavering post to retrieve your clothes and some food for himself, which just so happened to be when you finally came around.

Scrunching your eyebrows together, you get a bit worried at the implication of Andy still being home well into, from what you can tell, the early afternoon, “where's Haru? Is he alright? Is Andy…?” 

Logan smiles widely at your immediate, gut reaction to check on them and he shakes his head, “everyone's fine. Andy, uhm… h-he was with… us… earlier this mornin’ is all… came in lookin’ for you and you… you had ‘im stay. We both got some extra shut eye… forcibly, I may add… but n-nothin’ major...” he suddenly chuckles and murmurs jestingly, losing his stuttered cadence, “I'm bettin’ you didn't know about any of that, though, did you?” 

Grinning that you managed to commandeer them without remembering it, especially when you assume that a full night's sleep should've freed you from the influence of your foolhardy, alcoholic activities, you chuckle softly back and begin to understand just how nebulous your memory appears to be, “something tells me that that's just the first of many things I have no recollection of…” 

Not wanting to push things this soon after the topic of last night takes center stage, he carefully releases his hold on you and stands, “c'mon, you should get cleaned up and I'll fetch ya somethin’ to eat… need to get some of them drinks outta you.”

Inhaling shakily, you nod and glance past him at your clothes by the door, “good idea, I'll… uhm, I suppose I'll just… leave these in here…”

Accidentally letting his more private thoughts slip out, Logan casually remarks, “why don't you keep the shirt?” His eyes widen fretfully when the comment leaves his lips, but to his surprise and benefit, you don't pick up on it, “I-I said it last night, but it… it don't fit me anymore an’, besides…” he smirks and unintentionally blushes as he openly admires the sight of you wearing it one final time, “it looks a lot better on you.” 

You may not be aware of what transpired during the course of yesterday evening or this morning, but you're absolutely certain that if you weren't dizzy enough already, you are now. Doing your best to hide how besotted his offer and once over just made you, you slowly stand and take a few uneasy steps before you sway a little, your lightheadedness prompting Logan to urgently grasp your arm to steady you as you catch yourself on the table. 

Trying to downplay it while you reclaim your footing, you giggle slightly, “well, this… this might be a bad sign… t-thanks for… catching me…” you trail off when your eyes find his and a tender memory of you saying that very same thing to him comes flooding forward.

Quickly noticing that something has changed in his gaze, though you’re not entirely sure what that something is, you quietly thank him again and without another word, knowing that you don’t have a choice either way with him more keenly aware of your true condition, allow yourself to be guided to the bathroom. 

Leaning heavily on your palms against the sink when he goes back to bring you your clothes, you look up at him apologetically as he sets them down beside you. Meeting your eyes, he takes a deep breath and produces a one-sided reassuring smile. Furrowing his eyebrows together when he notices that you’re a little alarmed by the nuances of your circumstances, unaware that it’s dually because of the concern you’ve detected in his features, he agrees to break his formative rule once more.

Slowly shifting his attention to your hands with an unyielding concentration, Logan gulps softly and places his own on top of yours, delicately tracing his index finger across the edge of your wrist. Finding himself overcome with emotion that you’re back in his life, regardless of how things unfold from here, his expression softens and he whispers, “take your time an’... holler if you need me, alright?” Inhaling softly to quell his pounding heart, he looks upwards and into your eyes, his seriousness readily apparent in both his voice and gaze, “no matter what I’ll… I’ll be there, jus’... let me know.” 

Breathless and mystified by the intrinsic message you discern, you’re barely able to nod in response as you watch him leave and shut the door behind him. Intently squeezing your eyes closed as you try to mentally replicate the warmth in his to calm down, you take a moment to race through what little you do remember of the night before. Frustrated with yourself when nothing of note comes to you, you cling to the gut feeling you have that something did indeed change, though you’re growing more and more desperate to learn what. Opening your eyes once the notion of returning to him is your lone desire, you carefully begin to get dressed and head downstairs after you’re finished. 

In a little while as he descends the stairs, armed with a light breakfast, you smile and look at him bashfully, “oh, Logan you didn’t have to do all of this… you're too kind, really. Thank you. Though every part of me says not to eat this, it smells great.”

Grinning to himself, he smirks and nods, sitting down in the other chair closest to the front door. Observing you attentively as you take your first bite, he realizes that you look relatively rested, which hasn’t been the case for quite some time. Though you’re focusing all of your energy on eating, you elatedly compliment him on how delicious it is with a giant smile. 

Laughing at your unexpected fervor, he shrugs, “don't you go tellin’ Haru, he'll want me to actually try to be better at cookin’...”

You giggle a little and narrow your eyes at him, “is that right? Are you saying you're not a good cook? I mean it, this is seriously hitting the spot and it's not the hangover talking. I swear.”

Exhaling deeply, his casual demeanor retreats slightly and his voice grows quieter, “my Pa had a… a rough few years an’ this always seemed to make ‘im feel better when he'd wake up the next mornin’... got pretty good at fixin’ it… suppose it's the one thing I can make.”

Gently setting the fork down with a dull clink, you look at him sadly and immediately feel guilty for putting him in a similar position. Hoping that he hasn't made too strong of a connection between the two situations, you bite your lip anxiously and reply softly, “I'm… I’m sorry that I'm still here. I… I hope I didn't trouble you too much. I-I'll replace every bottle and then some, on my honor.”

He shakes his head and looks at you earnestly, “ah, c’mon… don’t start with that. I'm happy you're ‘ere an’ that you stayed, honest.”

You nod and shift your gaze down towards the plate, quickly realizing you're probably not going to be able to stomach the rest because of your nerves. Daring yourself to obtain some clarity, you pipe up shyly, “Logan… what happened last night?”

In spite of his curiosity to hear your perspective, he expects your response to be littered with holes, many of which he isn’t entirely sure how to assist in filling, “well what, uh… whaddya remember?”

Shrugging as you lick your lips, you pause to think and use it as an excuse to have a swig of water, “it's fuzzy… honestly, it feels like a weird dream. I remember some things, but others I…” you smirk when you think about the surprise outfit change from earlier, “I know that I was a jerk, yelled at you, and you very sweetly brought me inside and humored my stupid choices… I remember not wanting to leave… I remember how dumb I must've been to think I could drink that much and not be a disastrous mess…” you trail off and sigh defeatedly, gradually starting to speak softer and softer, “though I guess that was the point… and it uhm… it gets blurry after I decided to stay with you. I-I know that I was happy a-and that I felt whole for a… little while… I… I faintly remember you mentioning something about me taking it easy, which is sound advice if I heard you right and I plan on adhering to it…” finally looking over at him, you scrunch your eyebrows together pensively, “did… did anything else happen? We obviously ended up upstairs… I probably fell asleep on you, sorry for that too, though I guess you might be used to that by now…” smiling to yourself, you suddenly get a bit teary, “I don't know, things just feel… I-I feel… different. It's like I had a revelation or something, but I can't put my finger on it… any ideas?” 

The longer he listens to your rambled explanation, the happier Logan gets. You might be missing the specifics, but you just tremendously eased his anxious mind. After you turn to him, he smiles lazily at you and relaxes from your timid expression, “mhm… nope, that's… that's pretty much the gist of it. We stayed down ‘ere for a while an’ then I brought ya upstairs. You've been sleepin’ ever since, clearly needed it…” he chuckles and shoots you a teasing look, “started thinkin’ I'd have to come get you though, make sure you were alright.” 

You blush softly, “thank you for taking care of me…” smirking shakily as your eyelids flutter in tandem with your heart, you vulnerably press your inquisitive quest further, “I'm so happy I have you back.”

He inhales deeply and holds his tongue, permitting his mind to comb through the myriad of little intimate moments you've shared in the last day as a proxy diversion. Recalling the smallest details in your expressions, the sensation of your touch, and the reliance on him remains at the forefront of his mind as he contemplates his next move, knowing all the while that he wants nothing more than to tell you everything, to put this whole thing to rest and be with you the way he wants to, but he assumes that it would be too large of a leap this soon after losing Grace and your strenuous time apart. Electing to conduct his own test, seeing if it’ll trigger your memory and save the two of you from your afflictions, he slowly searches your eyes and murmurs, “me too, darlin’, me too…” 

Turning a deep red, you freeze, “what happened to ‘Builder’?”

Logan stays very still, waiting to see if it clicks.

Nervously rambling a little, you briefly avert your eyes and chuckle, “what? Why are you looking at me like that? Am I supposed to be mad at you or something?”

Furrowing his eyebrows together, he shakes his head and looks away as well, “n-no… no. Sorry, figured you'd uh… nevermind. I-I can call ya somethin’ else…”

Shaking your head, you look over at him again, “no, don’t. I like it. It’s got a nice ring to it and plus…" you giggle faintly to yourself, “the accent helps.”

Understanding that you didn’t recall a thing despite your flustered response, Logan huffs sadly to himself and rolls his eyes when you look away to continue eating, deciding that he’s probably being karmically punished for withholding some of the more nuanced information from you.

When you eventually finish your breakfast, Logan says that he’ll take you home. Knowing that he wants to ensure that you actually make it there in one piece, though you try to say you’ve troubled him enough as it is, you concede and allow him to help you onto your mount when you head outside. He jumps on Rambo and keeps him closely planted at your mount’s side the whole way there. 

Passing by your workshop on Merle after concluding his errands for the day, Haru runs into the two of you just on the other side of the train tracks. The three of you convene near the station and Haru tentatively says hello and inquires on how you’re doing.

Chuckling a little, you shrug, “well, I have an escort home if that answers your question…” you chuckle a bit harder, “and I effectively remember nothing from last night so… please accept my apology for anything I might've said to you. Though from the sounds of it, Logan was my lone, very patient babysitter for the latter portion of our evening.” 

Haru pulls a face, an incredibly subtle, nervous one, and you both notice almost instantly. You smirk and scrunch your eyebrows together as he scrambles to disguise it, “uh… did I say something to you last night? Are you the reason I have this weird feeling? I know I must've said or done something, but Logan can't seem to recall anything…” 

The secret message in Haru's eyes hits you like a freight train and just like that, you remember what's been eating at you all morning. As the color drains from your face, you look down at your saddle and hastily shut your eyes, trying to come to terms with your abrupt realization. 

Worried by your reaction, Logan swiftly interjects, “what, what's wrong?”

Inhaling sharply, you spin to look at Logan, sincerely hoping that he didn’t hear your drunken confession. When you’re only met by his confused panic rather than even an inkling of comprehension, you shake your head faintly and do your best to play it off, “n-nothing… I just… I got a little dizzy for a second there…”

Haru allows a fleeting smile to form on his lips, knowing that a critical portion of your elusive memory has returned, but hurriedly rids himself of it when Logan inquisitively glances at him. Realizing that Logan's astute gaze has singled him out and is rapidly searching his flimsy masked expression for an answer, genuinely starting to consider that he neglected to share something with him, Haru shakes his head and calmly responds to you, “well, you couldn't have. I went to bed once you left and didn’t know that you were still there until this morning. You didn’t have the chance to say anything to me, I’m afraid… sorry I can’t be more help. Maybe you’ll think of it later or Logan will remember what it is since he spent so much time with you. Whatever it is, I’m sure it’ll come to one of you eventually…”

Humorously, you and Logan shoot Haru an uncomfortable glare at the exact same time, though both are delivered for very different reasons. Sighing defeatedly to himself, knowing that he has to keep up this irritating little charade for each of your sakes, he refrains from rolling his eyes as he steers the conversation in another direction with a flat, mitigating tone, “never seen you start moving around so late, you need a hand at the workshop today?”

“No, but that's sweet of you…” you shrug and follow his benevolent lead, giving him a grateful look, “I'm probably going to attempt a shower and go straight back to bed. I'm not feeling inclined to do much of anything today, which honestly might do me some good…” you smirk and there is a newfound calmness to your voice as you glance happily at Logan, “it’s funny how getting drunk can provide someone with so much clarity.”

Though you intended your comment to hint at your adherence to Logan’s concerned kindness, the more obvious reason, which consists of varying details for all three of you due to your unique versions of last night, never crosses your mind.

“Well, best be gettin’ you home then...” Logan says gently, wearing a small, lazy smile, seemingly unaware that Haru is even there. 

Haru intently observes the two of you speak and recognizes that for once, neither of you are skittish that he's present while you behave like this. It's always been longing glances and sorely latent comments, but he's never witnessed your feelings being exchanged this openly. Serving as a minor distraction, Haru's more so surprised at how effortlessly you recovered from your own realization and how tacitly you managed to sideline Logan's attentiveness. He's never seen anyone handle him like that, and quite frankly, he's dumbfounded.

Blushing faintly, you look down bashfully and finally break eye contact with Logan as your blissful smile continues to grow. You gradually return your attention to Haru and you quietly, distractedly say that you'll see him later. 

Shaking his head scoldingly, Haru chuckles under his breath watching you two leave and thinks:

Well Grace, somehow you did this. Your meddling finally paid off and you're not even here to see it. I just hope they figure it out soon…

Once you reach your stable, Logan takes your hand to help you off of your mount and you chuckle softly, “I swear I can still function, Logan. I might feel terrible, but I'm not going to fall apart…” 

He smirks and teases you as he continues to help you anyway, holding onto you just a little bit tighter, “mhm-hm, I know, but I can't have you fallin’ now can I…?”

You bite the inside of your cheek to keep from smiling even bigger, shaking your head at the irony of his words. Taking the opportunity to not let go of his hand for a while longer as he finishes guiding you to your door, you decide to probe for clarity to confirm if he heard you downstairs in the chairs or not, “you're sure nothing changed last night? Haru seemed a little… how should I put it…?”

“Suspicious?” 

You giggle and nod, “exactly?!”

He shrugs and chuckles softly, “might jus’ be Haru… who knows what he gets up to sometimes, but trust me, I intend on askin’ him what that was about…”

Feeling relieved that it seems like he has no clue, you laugh, “I promise I won't tell him you said that… a-and you better report back if you find out anything. I'm, I'm really curious to know…” 

Openly marveling at you as your laughter dies down and the conversation pauses, he reaches out to gingerly tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, “keep feelin’ better, darlin’...” 

Nuzzling against his hand as he begins to caress your cheek, you stare devotedly at as much of him as you can, hoping to ingrain the fond image into your memory, “I already do, thanks to you.” Looking down shyly, you furrow your eyebrows together and whisper, “I just need…”

Understanding your sentiments before you even have the chance to finish imparting them, he slowly pulls his hand away, “a minute…?” 

You nod sadly, “yeah.” 

Though it pains both of you to consider it, the two of you realize that you need to heal your individual wounds from your time apart, to mend yourselves more completely in preparation for that next, enticing step of returning to where you left off. 

“So take a minute… t-take five, if you want.”

Helplessly smiling at his fidelity, you greet his eyes again, “no, just a minute… nothing more.”

Grinning at your echoed reference, he shakes his head amorously at you, “nothin’ more.”

After you exchange your soft goodbyes, he begins to leave, but stops curiously at the sound of your anxious voice calling out behind him, “hey, Logan?”

He doesn't even have the chance to fully turn in your direction before you've hastily thrown your arms around his neck, tackling him into the biggest hug you can muster. Chuckling quietly under his breath as he catches you, he presses his face into your shoulder and squeezes you as tightly as he can in return. 

It takes all of your strength to let him go, but you refuse to move. Slipping back towards the ground as he releases you, you slide your arms downwards and rest your fingertips on his collarbone and upper chest, lightly clutching his jacket. With his forearm still snuggly around your lower back and his hand splayed across your hip, delicately gripping your skin, he holds you close as you stand immovably against him. Mere inches from each other's faces, you find yourselves swept up in the moment. 

Pensively scrunching his eyebrows together, doing his absolute best to maintain the unspoken promise you just made to one another, he leans down a little and kisses your forehead deeply, letting his eyes droop closed when you exhale a small, content moan.

“Don't be a stranger, yakboy…” you whisper.

“Wouldn't dream of it…” he murmurs, lingeringly breathing you in. 

Reluctantly removing yourselves from your impassioned embrace, Logan reverently looks at you for a final time and departs. Feeling like a dizzy, irrational, lovesick teenager, you giggle happily and fall gently backwards against your front door the second you shut it. Though you know that in some ways you just gave yourself away and ignored your request for space entirely, right now, you could care less. Failing to regain your sanity as you excitedly ponder what will happen when you see him next, you smirk feebly after remembering the hard truth of your previous hidden, yearning games: 

This is going to be the longest minute of my life, isn't it?

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

Determined to foster a quiet night for yourself when it arrives to keep your word to Logan, that evening you fixed some dinner and made your way out onto your upstairs balcony, eager to relax by taking in the view of the snow-capped mountains in the distance. Leisurely sipping on an herbal tea that the Mystery Man gifted you, you settle in and readily welcome the peace the evening brings.

Just as you get comfortable, you hear the thundering of hooves whizzing by your fence below. Curiously leaning forward off of your yakboy swing, you grin at the sight that greets you. Speeding past your rear fence is Logan and Haru on Rambo and Merle, shouting their conversation at one another as they pass by. Thinking that they won't spot you, you simply shake your head and chuckle to yourself, amused by their childlike whimsy. 

Glancing over his shoulder at your balcony, Logan frivolously wonders if you'll be there like you were that night and immediately yanks Rambo to a standstill when he sees you through the railing. 

Impressed he saw you and flattered that he even took the time to look, you shyly make your way over to the balcony's edge after removing your mother’s quilt from your lap. Leaning on your forearms with the mug of tea still loosely held in your hands, you scrunch your eyebrows together, “I can't believe you spotted me…” you chuckle a little as your intrigued smile grows, “where are you two trouble makers headed off to?” 

Logan flashes a large smile when he notices that you’re wearing his shirt and is entirely unaware of Haru's confused expression as he trots over on Merle to investigate why he stopped, “gotta let the goats run, been too cooped up lately… wanna come?” 

“No…” you smirk, shooting an apologetic look at Haru when he rolls his eyes with a grin at Logan's invitation, “I don't think I'd survive tonight if I tagged along, but it sure sounds like fun. Count me in for next time… okay?” 

“C'mon, Romeo…” Haru teases with a soft chuckle, steadying an impatient Merle beneath him.

Merle huffs and flits in place, bumping her head into Rambo's shoulder with a soft bleat, demanding that he be restless too. You giggle a little when she manages to get Rambo going again and although it quickly becomes clear that the three of them outnumber Logan in their various levels of urgency to continue on with their quest, Logan staunchly remains unphased as he stares up at you wearing an adorable, pleading expression. His impressive attempt at ignoring them makes you hesitate to send him away, but only temporarily. 

“Don't worry, yakboy…” you coax gently, letting the love in your heart escape into your eyes, hoping to ease him into acceptance that you aren't going anywhere and that it's okay to go without you, no matter how badly you both want him to stay, “I'll see you tomorrow.” 

You watch his fond gaze linger on you for a moment until he's made his peace with your statement. Imparting a wordless, affectionate farewell, Logan removes his hat to wave it, heedfully readying himself to tell Rambo to move out. To everyone's surprise, Rambo launches into an unruly rear and takes off without warning. Merle hastily dashes off in pursuit, causing Haru to express a fretful goodbye, his voice rapidly fading in the growing distance between you. What little you can hear of Logan's giddy scolding makes you overcome with joy and the sound of your resulting laughter echoes behind theirs as they race off into the sunset's afterglow, leaving you alone to bask in its solitude. 

Tucking a strand of hair behind your ear that the breeze mischievously displaces as your amusement wanes, you start to feel rather selfish for almost asking him to be here with you tonight instead of letting him enjoy his own adventure. All the days you've spent without him mean that you're a bit more anxious than you used to be about seeing him again, the notion causing you to sternly remind yourself that from now on, every new day will be a step in the right direction. You're certain of it. 

Waiting patiently for them to disappear over the horizon before you mentally venture down that road, paranoid that the wind would somehow betray you and carry your thoughts to them if they were too close, you bide your time by ponderously watching the thin white clouds melt into the pale purple sky. Once the stars emerge, defining themselves amongst the vanishing pastels, you collect your dishes and quilt from the swing with a defeated, slow exhale. You frown a little as you walk back into your bedroom and nimbly secure the balcony door, knowing that you're closing yourself off for the remainder of the night by doing so.

As you glance around the lonely room, you get an idea and pad over to your desk, setting the items in your hand down to retrieve a few blank sheets of paper and a pen. Unwittingly welcoming the scattered series of thoughts that enter your mind, ones that dually provide you with imaginary conversation and company, you begin to write a letter that you have no intention of ever sending.

Dear Grace,

I can't take it anymore, so I’m just going to jump right into it, okay?

I really am screwed… aren't I?

Light…

I'd almost feel better if you were here pestering me. It isn't right, feeling this ridiculous without you. I need you to remind me how in over my head I am.

It's funny, I never thought a good, relentless lecture from you could come in handy at a time like this, but… never say never, I suppose. It certainly would make things a little easier to swallow… at least I'd have you to help me figure all of this out. 

I can just hear you now, spouting off some snarky comments about fate, how love can be cruel, but you'd eagerly promise to be worse than all of it now that Haru knows… now that I admitted it…

But… does he actually know? Maybe… no, he must… right? What else would have made him so nervous earlier…? I mean, I feel like I barely know, but at the same time I've… I've known for so long. I guess if I just assume that Haru knows, it'll give me a healthy dose of humility when I'm around him, for whatever it's worth…

Wait – is that why they took off tonight? You don't think that he'd tell Logan, would he? No… he's his best friend, but he'd never do that to me… you wouldn't dare if the situation was reversed.

Nevermind. Enough of that. I hardly have enough brain power right now as it is.

Peach, I can't believe I said that last night… I'll nev–... hmph… I'll do my very best to never drink that much again. I guess that's what hitting rock bottom gets you, an overbearing realization of truth and an awful headache to boot. I hope it's better in the morning… the headache, I mean.

Grace, I'll just cut to the chase.

If it wasn't obvious yet, I'm… I'm a mess and I'm in deep… far too deep to have any reasonable fragment left in my heart to steer me away from this shameless grip he has on me. Although, I can say with extreme confidence that my head is useless at this point. Got that going for me. I might as well consider that fleeting understanding a win… though, it doesn't feel like much of a win.

I mean, look where being “supportive” got me… trying to remove myself from the picture, all the while I was going crazy that I wasn't there for him? That he wasn't there for me? 

I'm a moron. Actually, no, we both are. He's just as much of a moron as me. We established that earlier today for… different reasons…

Don't worry about it. The details aren't important.

What really matters… what I need to know… what I want to ask is…

Why didn't you tell me earlier?

Why did this have to drag on so long?

If I could just tell him… Light, I'd be so happy to put this all behind us and just start over… but, I'd fight like hell to keep the memories. They're too precious to be forgotten… everything we've been through is the reason I…

Maybe I shouldn't even write it.

In fact, I should probably stop saying – thinking – it entirely, just until I figure this out. I pushed him away once, let's ensure that at least one day passes before I do it again… hm?  

How is that he knows me better than I know myself anyhow…? Why do I feel so whole when I'm with him and so empty when he isn't around? I shouldn't rely on somebody like that, I shouldn't need him this way…

It can't be normal, can it?

To tell you the truth, part of me hopes that it is… it feels… nice. 

If I could feel like this forever, I don't think I'd ever complain about anything ever again… 

Scouts honor. 

Honestly, listen to me… what do I know about… that word…? Not much, I'm sure.

Somehow I feel like you're an expert in that area too. I'll go ahead and assume that's one more thing you failed to mention, Grace. I could really use a lesson or two… I may not be cut out to be an… archeologist… but could you please teach me how to deal with this? For old times sake? 

No. I can do this by myself. I'm smart… I… well, I guess I'll have to rely on that useless head of mine, won't I?

Fine.

Here's what I think… a reasonable person would wait, give it time. We just fixed things and I was half present for pretty much all of it. We sort of agreed to do that earlier anyway, but no matter how idiotic it is, I can't help but wonder if he was just being nice to me… I mean what if he actually doesn't feel the same way…? I don't know what I'd do with myself if he didn't… if anything, he'd probably run for the hills if I said a word of this to him right now.

Oh, Grace… you should've been there… the things he said to me when I was sober. I've never been so happy to be yelled at in my life, my ears are still ringing… 

Wait, time out. Let me make one thing clear.

I hear myself… okay? I hear how insane I sound, but I can't blame him if we can't blame me for making things so complicated… really, it's almost comical how equally stubborn we are… what a ruthless game he and I have found ourselves playing. Like I said, for all I know he's being nice… we've been through the wringer together… self-inflicted and otherwise…

I guess I could ask Haru what he thinks. I know that he'd set me straight, but… that probably means I'd be opening up a can of worms I'm not prepared to deal with just yet. I also wholeheartedly refuse to put him in an awkward position by confessing all of this… again… 

Honestly, I hope I haven't managed to do that already without you here. All that time we spent apart and I don't think Haru ever batted an eye when he was with either of us. He's one of the most selfless people I've ever met…

I hope he knows that.

I'm really going to miss him when he decides to leave for school. I wish he knew just how proud Logan is that he might do it someday… we both are.

I'll tell him when that day comes, maybe Logan finally will too.

How about you tell me something, Grace… have the two of us been like this since the beginning? I'd never be able to look at him… or you… or Haru the same way again if you said yes. 

Additional moron points for us may be warranted, I'm afraid. 

Call it a feeling, an inkling really, but something tells me you'd be screaming at me right about now that the answer is indeed yes. Maybe I knew that already… hard to accept the truth when you're so close to it.

After everything, is it even fair to think that he'd actually…? 

Grace…

Please say yes.

And… what do I do now…? 

I miss you.

I hope my gut is right and you'll be back soon. I don't care if soon is actually soon… can we agree to disagree on you coming back… eventually? Maybe…? I know you can't tell me. I wish you could. 

Everything is so different without you, but… thanks for giving me the push I needed to get this off my chest tonight, even though I know you'll never read it.

I should just send it, really confuse you... it would be funny, wouldn't it? I think I can spare a stamp for a meager attempt at payback for making me worry sick… oh to see the look on your face when you'd reach this part, if this letter ever managed to find you. I'm sure you'd get a good laugh out of it and say you hate me for not explaining things better… or at all, really.

Guess you have to write me back or come home to hear the full story. Darn.  

Anyway, it's getting late. I promised I'd see him tomorrow. I guess it wasn't a promise to him, it really was one I made to myself… to pick up where we left off… or… so I hope. I better get to bed so this stupid, lingering headache doesn't make me a liar. Wish me luck. 

Love,

Your hopeless best friend

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

Chapter Text

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

Haru's announcement that he was leaving for Atara felt sudden. It’s only been a few weeks since you and Logan’s reconciliation, but graciously, things between you returned to normal almost immediately. Now that the trajectory of your life seems to be heading in a more positive direction, you’ve been spending a great deal of your time with the rekindled, slightly smaller gang and selfishly, fond of the new, more uplifting routine, Haru’s departure seemed dishearteningly premature. In Grace’s absence, the two of you have become quite close, more so than you ever were before. Though most of your individual, finer feelings were intentionally kept hidden from Logan and Andy to avoid dredging up the past, you and Haru found it quite easy to provide moments of silent support whenever you needed each other. As for you and Logan, the mere sighting of you two together reignited the lamented background chatter around town. Just as you were aware of it then, you both decide to privately begin your game-like antics again; however, adhering to your desire to heal yourselves in preparation for that next step, you ensured that you kept things amenable. 

Aside from the stress of his looming farewell, in true Sandrock fashion, the week that Haru is leaving is jam packed with activities. Lately, you’ve been doing your best to take things a little bit easier, but when Logan’s monster hunting path continued to develop and you were commissioned to rebuild Howlett’s old outpost, you happily made an exception to your limited pursuits for him. Around the same time, Penny, a Barnarock musician who arrived in Sandrock during a rather violent sandstorm and unfortunately broke her prized guitar in the process of getting off the train, inspired a friendly competition between herself and Coogo that became known as the “Battle of the Bands”. Sending an excited shockwave through town upon its advertisement, you quickly found yourself assisting with its planning as well. 

Unintentionally, both of Haru’s goodbye parties, one planned by you, Andy, and Logan, and another in secret by you and Heidi, and the competition just so happen to be occurring back to back. You do your best to prepare yourself for a whirlwind two days that’ll consist of not one, not two, but three parties. Just thinking about it makes your head spin. 

To kick things off, you met Logan at the Outpost so that he could show you what he had done with the place after you metaphorically handed him the keys upon its completion. Highly impressed by the cozy touches he added despite his adamancy to maintain the gruff shack image, the main thing that caught your eye was a framed photo beside the one of him and Howlett. You cautiously inched up to it and found yourself at a loss for words when you realized what it was. It's the lone photo of the gang where all five of you were present. Though it took much convincing, the last time you, Grace, Haru, Andy, and Logan were together was at your place the night Logan helped you finish the basket for Daisy and you outright begged to commemorate the occasion, which produced the resulting picture. After he timidly asked if you liked it, you pushed aside your rattled emotions and informed him that you had a surprise outside, but you'd only give it to him if he went into the lookout tower first. He suspiciously agreed and remarked that he was excited to appreciate the view with you anyway. You took a final, lingering glance around the humble room and shut the door to follow him. 

Deeming it an “outpost warming gift” to keep him company, you used the excuse that you had to learn to make one for Penny to build him a brand new guitar. You specifically chose Acacia wood that you harvested from the Northern Plateau and told him that you'd only ever use the best materials for the best monster hunter in the Eufaula. The giddy smile on his face was worth every minute of the genuine love that you poured into constructing it and before he had the chance to fully admire it, you apologized that you couldn't stay, explaining that you needed to help set up for the party, and hurriedly left him to his own devices in the tower.

Though you felt badly for leaving so abruptly, your sudden departure was intentional. Grateful that he didn't notice with you standing there, Logan examined the guitar a bit more closely as you retreated down the ladder and spotted two personal additions that you created at the rear base of the guitar's neck. Assuming that it was the location where his hand would be the most, using it as a signifying metaphor for the details, you etched Howlett's monster sign sapling mark at the bottom and topped it with a small constellation scene, which upon further inspection, had Orion in the very center. 

Your decision to include those finishes was to impart a subtle message, a sort of calling card to him, one that you hoped would make your sentiments clear that you're finally ready to try things again. As you began heading into town, you grinned at the distinct echo of “your song” being played behind you. Assuming that his choice to play it was his reply, you happily slowed your mount to a walk to hear the melody for as long as the wind would carry it to you. 

Later that evening, you nervously emerge from your house to find two of the “The Fleeting Youth Tea Society” members waiting for you and you immediately feel a bit of relief when you see them. The four of you had crafted a plan at your latest meeting, one you were undoubtedly the least thrilled about. The topic of you and Logan's rekindled relationship has been at the epicenter of every discussion your group has had and as usual, they were determined to bring some drama into play. Knowing that the “Battle of the Bands” was fast approaching, it shouldn't take much to guess that they wanted to capitalize on the opportunity, unanimously agreeing to make you a show stopper yourself. 

Amirah and Pablo squeal with elation when they see you, readily fawning over your appearance. It isn't much, just an outfit change, but they're convinced it'll attract the attention of a certain someone. Thrilled you're going along with it, they actually make you anxious to see how things shake out, though you're adamant that you have zero expectations for any of it and are stalwartly convinced that Logan won't spare something as simple as clothes a second thought. 

“Heidi sends her apologies that she won't be joining us until later,” Amirah sighs, waving her hand defeatedly as the three of you begin to make your way over, “she said she had some last minute preparations to finish up for the after party.”  

“You know that girl, work, work, work… sounds like you anymore, am I right?” Pablo teases, bumping your arm with a grin. 

Rolling your eyes, you chuckle and hush them, “don't you start. I'm just ready to have some fun tonight. It's all been too much lately and… now that Haru's leaving, well…” 

Your positive mood sobers slightly and they speedily correct it. Amirah smiles warmly at you, “no, I'll hear none of that. As you said, tonight is about fun only…” she glances ahead and smiles widely, “look… what luck. He's with Owen and Justice… guess we'll see if our little plan works much sooner than we thought, eh, Pablo?” 

Pablo nods eagerly and your stomach does a restless flip, begging you to turn around and change. The only comfort you find in this whole thing is that everyone seems to have dressed up to some degree for the event, given that it's one of the larger shindigs this town has seen in quite a while. If your memory serves you correctly, the last celebration on this scale was when Musa first visited Sandrock. 

I just hope it goes better this time…

It's no secret that Owen and Amirah participate in flirtatious banter from time to time, so you think nothing of her imparting a coltish hello to him as you approach, her tone clearly indicating that she wants the three of them to notice the three of you. Owen, Logan, and Justice all turn with unexpecting smiles and both you and Amirah seamlessly train your eyes on your respective targets, readying yourselves to receive even their most minute responses. Caught off-guard by Logan's more polished attire, a black long-sleeved button down and a pair of dark jeans, you do your best to give him a subtle, but hasty once over before you reach them to ensure that, in staying true to the plan, he doesn't see you admiring him. Forcing your gaze downwards, temporarily mesmerized by how absurdly handsome he looks, you fight a smile when you start to find amusement in his apparent inability to rid himself of his signature hat for the evening. Luckily for him, even if it wasn't intentional, it is undoubtedly your favorite component of his entire swoon worthy ensemble. 

Owen immediately grins and shakes his head playfully at her subliminal posturing, “beautiful as always Amirah…” tearing his eyes away when he notices your own intriguing appearance, he raises his eyebrows in pleasant surprise, “and w-wow… you look great.” 

Justice nods and huffs sheepishly to himself, “yeah you do, y-you both do, but… dang, I didn't know you even owned somethin’ like that, Builder. It looks real nice on you.”

You chuckle at them, trying your best to play it cool even though you're now resolutely more nervous than you were from receiving their unexpected praises, “oh, this? Thank you… I, uhm… I don't really have an excuse to wear it much, that's all…” 

Realizing that the one person you were hoping to hear from hasn't said a word, you bravely glance once more at Logan between them and pick up on the gob smacked look in his eyes. Despite his gigantic smile, you understand that he's found himself tongue tied and is apparently unable to say much of anything at present. Smiling shyly at him, pleased with his reaction, you bite your lip to try and hide it as you move past them to say hello to Penny, Cooper, and Hugo busily warming up on stage. Thinking that small exchange was the end of it, you eagerly wrap yourself up in the new conversation and heartily congratulate each of them on such a big turnout.

Steadfast in his role of acting as your observant bodyguard for the evening, Pablo has remained silent, which is incredibly unlike him. Once your friendly chatter with the musicians wanes, he jumps at the chance to fill you in on what's been happening in the background, “don't look now, but those three haven't stopped staring since we said hello.”

You smirk and lean towards him slightly, “hm…? What do you mean? How do you know they're looking at us anyway? We are standing directly in front of them and are with the people we all came to see… we can't be that entertaining,” you look worriedly at Amirah for backup, “can we…?” 

He shakes his head and bends Amirah's ear as well, “no, the stupid smiles on their faces tells me that they're concocting some sort of devious scheme… they seem far too happy to just be having a boring conversation. I mean it, it has to be something exciting… go on, take a look for yourselves!”

Amirah glances over her shoulder first and chuckles astonishedly to herself, “oh my, Pablo's right… huh… for our speechless bandit, he sure seems to have a lot to say now and by all accounts, I think he likes what he sees…!”

You giggle a little and whimper as you muster the courage to turn around, “seriously you two, you've got it all wrong. I'm telling you, he doesn't care ab–…”

As you pivot and lock eyes with him, you instantly forget the rest of your sentence. Floundering under the newfound intensity of his demeanor, you remain frozen as Logan admiringly begins to trace over every inch of you wearing a will-numbing smile. Even as he nods in response to something Owen says, he doesn't come remotely close to tearing his attentive eyes away from you, smoothly allowing them to flicker back to yours when he’s through taking you in for a second time.

There is something that you find painfully comforting in the words he isn't saying, but rather conveying through his most elusive expressions, the ones he ensures that only you will be able to read as you hold one another's gazes. The intimacy the two of you have come to know means that you understand that this is the best compliment you could ever hope to receive, it's an affectionate message reserved for you and you alone. Though your voiceless interaction spans a matter of seconds, you realize just how badly you've missed this quiet bond and you welcome the peace he brings you as he effortlessly breaks you down and puts you back together again just by looking at you.   

"Y'know, you're not being very polite... didn't your mother ever teach you that it's rude to stare at a lady?" Amirah muses on your behalf, trying to throw him off. 

Recognizing that he's been backed into a corner in such a public setting, Logan tactfully replies without hesitation, raising an eyebrow as he smirks and folds his arms confidently, his deadly, inviting eyes remaining fixated on yours, "no, she didn't."

All four of your counterparts quickly plant their jaws on the floor and erupt into a symphony of soft gasps and chuckles, their attention hastily pivoting to you, eager to catch a glimpse of your response. 

Though his sultry, crass comment threatens to reduce you to a puddle, you know your mischievous plans are teetering on the verge of ruin with him acting like this, so you manage to narrow your eyes and gently scoff before you hurriedly avert your gaze. Shifting your jaw to the side as you discreetly bite your tongue, you find yourself smiling so widely that your cheeks begin to ache, your blush gradually deepening under the careful watch of his marveling. 

So, that's how it's going to be? Fine.

Game on, yakboy. Calling card or not, I'm not letting you win that easily.

Playfully turning your nose up at him when Amirah and Pablo protectively lace their arms in yours, coaxing you to move elsewhere, you pull a calm, disinterested face and shrug your shoulders. Intentionally swinging one of your hips out as you spin and walk away, you maintain unwavering eye contact with him until the very last possible moment, “hmph… enjoy the concert boys…” 

Logan coquettishly tips his hat to you with his fingers and you roll your eyes, giving in to your massive, inescapable smile. You giggle excitedly with Pablo and Amirah, breezily beginning to mingle your way through the crowd, “alright, fine… I'll admit it, I had my doubts, but I was wrong… so, so very wrong. I'm convinced that might be the most fun thing we do all night.” 

Pablo tuts scoldingly at you and shakes his head, “oh no, darling. The night is young, flirty lines have been drawn, and we have work to do.” 

Just when you thought that your nerves couldn’t get much worse, you laugh softly and whine under your breath, “what did I get myself into…?”

Tactics are hurriedly shifted to make you as unobtainable as possible. A frantic rendezvous with Heidi just as the concert begins cements the new, relatively helter-skelter plan and you reluctantly agree to continue playing along, but only because you’ve become bemusedly inspired by the unexpected, solicitous exchange that Logan marshalled. Adhering to their guidance, you’re readily surrounded by your friends and though you’d love to spend some time with him, as the concert carries on, you slowly start to have so much fun that you forget it’s all a part of their supportive strategy. 

True to his observant, background nature, the highlight of Logan’s evening was not your previous interaction, but rather, it’s been his ability to simply watch you enjoy yourself. He hasn’t seen you this carefree in a very long time and whenever he catches a glimpse of your smile in the energetic crowd, he swears that tonight you just might outshine the moon. 

When the festivities move inside to reveal the second portion of the evening, Haru’s surprise going-away party, you’re quickly singled out by him and with a guilty grin, you give Haru a massive hug and mirthfully send him on his way to get dinner and cake graciously provided by Owen. Letting your guard down to celebrate the jubilant circumstances, you search for Logan in the sea of guests and when you find him, the two of you share a moment of fulfillment in the form of easy smiles.

After dinner concludes and people break off into various groups, news of you and Logan’s standoff earlier in the evening spreads like wildfire and things quickly are brought to a high stakes level all over again. Hearing bits and pieces of their frenzied discussions every now and then, both of you find yourselves incredibly curious to see what happens next, almost as much as everyone else is. Pressing on with your lovesick game of tag, any time Logan comes even remotely close to you, someone conveniently swoops you away. Sandrock may be his hometown, but tonight, to the glee of your conspiring peers, you’re dominating the popularity contest and it means that he’s going to have to work that much harder to put an end to your little war. 

One pitfall of your seemingly flawless plan is that, infuriatingly, Logan hasn’t been without Justice or Owen the entire night. Despite the fact that they’re incredibly close friends, their strange affinity to one another is becoming downright disreputable. Hoping to figure out the reason, you’ve rallied your colluding group of Heidi, Amirah, Pablo, and, as an honorary member for the evening, Penny. Sitting together in one of the booth sections in the quieter corner of the saloon, you stop midsentence when Haru makes an unexpected appearance. 

You grin as you scoot over to create space for him to sit down, “I’ve been watching you make your rounds, I’m so glad that you seem to be enjoying your party, but honestly, I’m a little surprised you chose us over the band of misfits over there.”

Appreciative of the gesture, Haru chuckles and scrunches his eyebrows together as he joins you, “the band of misfits, huh?”

Heidi shrugs and chuckles as well, “yup. That’s what we’re callin’ them, seems fittin’ to us with the way those three are actin’.”

“Ah, but Heidi…” Haru leers, “I’d have to agree, but everyone here knows that that used to be your old crew. You sure you shouldn’t be looped into that nickname?”

She waves him off, “that was a different time, and if anything, that means it should include you too. I mean it, tonight they’re actin’ like fools, the whole lot of ‘em.”

Haru chuckles harder, “fair point…” he turns to you and visually grows a bit more serious, “he definitely seems different tonight, but I haven’t talked to him yet.”

Pablo eagerly sits up and blurts out, “we’ve been saying that thing all night! They’re totally up to something, but we don’t have a clue what they’re plotting.”

Rolling your eyes at Pablo, you swivel your torso towards Haru, intrigued by his similar observation, “is that so? Well, maybe you should go figure out what it is then. We’re driving ourselves crazy trying to guess.”

“Aren't you busily plotting yourself?” Haru teases, “your little show has everyone talking.”

Delivering a celebratory high five to Pablo, Amirah jumps in, “good! That’s what we want.”

You hush her and shrug, “perhaps… but, my part in this whole thing is done. It’s these three that are keeping me away. Now I’m just having fun watching him try to catch me.”

With a curt laugh, Haru shakes his head at you, “will you two ever quit?”

“C’mon, Haru! This is clearly just a teensy impasse. Look, if you must know, I planted my own confessional seed this morning, now it’s his turn.”

“Hm… maybe I underestimated you.”

Playfully tapping the brim of Haru’s hat, you grin, “maybe he’ll underestimate you and our friendship and tell you what’s going on.”

Haru narrows his eyes suspiciously at you, “and since when do you have so much patience?”

Miserably failing to act offended, you scoff at his remark through your laughter, “excuse me, I have more patience in my entire body than he has in his pinky finger…” you huff and begin to grumble, fidgeting with your hands shyly in your lap, “and now I’m just… doing what I can to preserve what little of it I have left…” 

Laughing even harder, Haru consolingly pats your shoulder and departs, “that’s the spirit. Wait here, I’ll be back.”

Once he reaches Logan, who is standing by the rear wall across from the stage, Haru slides in beside him, leaning on his back against the bricks, “she says hello.”

Logan looks down at him amusedly and chuckles, raising an eyebrow, “oh, yeah? Did she send you over 'ere to say that?"

“Not exactly, we both agreed that someone should check on you. I know you’re not much for parties, but you’ve seemed quite… preoccupied. More than usual.”

Shifting his weight more heavily onto his upper shoulder blades, Logan chuckles looks away, intentionally pretending to be clueless, “ah, c’mon… I’m havin’ jus’ as much fun as you.”

Chuckling a little back, Haru shakes his head and folds his arms, “whatever you say…”

When he doesn’t provide anything more, Haru curiously follows Logan’s poignant gaze and sees you chatting animatedly with your hands, a signature peculiarity of yours that easily tells the two of them just how much you’re enjoying the conversation topic. 

In a longing, hushed voice, Logan sighs contently to himself and shakes his slowly at you, imparting a sentiment that he would only ever dare entrust to his brother, “she really is beautiful, isn't she?” 

Haru replies without hesitation, “inside and out.” Smirking softly at the tranquility in Logan's voice, he redirects his attention from you to him curiously, “does that mean tonight is finally the night…?” 

In spite of the intimidating question, Logan remains unwaveringly devoted to keeping an eye on each and every one of your jovial expressions. He lets his smile lazily spread to one half of his face before he inhales sharply and looks down, “I… I wouldn't dare outshine your party… but, if things work out… l-later on, maybe. Might have to go an’ thank Owen if it does… if it doesn't, after all this time what's waitin’ a few more days gonna hurt? It's still the plan to take ‘er with me once you go, really gotta look into them rogues usin’ our names that we caught wind of. Like we agreed, you need to focus on lookin’ forward now, put our time on the run behind you… a-an’ plus, half the town's got their ear bent tonight tryin’ to figure out what's goin’ on, last thing you need is to worry ‘bout helpin’ me hold ‘em off…” he shrugs and turns to Haru, “look I'm… I'm sorry you're so wrapped up in this. Never meant for it to get so complicated…” he chuckles and shifts his stance uncomfortably, “I guess I… I never meant for a lotta things to happen though, did I?” 

Andy wanders over to join the two of them after spotting them together as Haru replies, “no, please. Outshine away. I don’t even need to know what you’re up to, I just… I hope it works.”

Immediately curious, Andy pipes up, “hope what works?”

Taking his cue to leave to avoid forcing Logan to talk about it, to Andy's dismay and Logan's relief, Haru swiftly says his goodbyes and in upholding his word to be the most efficient of messengers, returns directly to you. 

“Well,” Haru says as he plops down again, “he says he’s fine.” 

Amirah rolls her eyes and cuts in, “he’s not fine, he’s delusional.”

Pablo sneers, “I second that.”

Heidi nods, “third.”

Though you aren't surprised by their teasing or Haru’s less than helpful tidbit, you laugh and hastily interrupt before the jesting discussion spirals out of control, “hey, hey, hey! He’s always like this, he just never shows it. You can’t scold him for being himself!”  

From your perspective, you've been in a stalemate with Logan all night. Breezily bouncing from conversation to conversation, ensuring that you stayed busy to force his hand and distract yourself from giving in, you decided to continue making it clear that catching you is the price and you intend on making him work for it. Now that things haven’t shown signs of changing, acutely aware of the fact that he’s significantly more hardheaded than you are, you start to wonder that at this rate, he may very well harness that stubbornness and outlast your wanton tactics. You’ve absolutely adored making him sweat because you know that he can’t stand that you’re winning; however, the lone caveat of every well crafted plan is the inevitable appearance of a loophole. Neither of you prepared for what measures the other would take once your patience wore thin and unfortunately for him, now that yours has, he’s about to find out.

“Why not? He's driving you crazy, doesn't that mean that it's more than usual?” Amirah prods gently.

“That man’s soul belongs to the wilds of the Eufaula, what did you three honestly think would happen tonight? He isn’t built for this. He fights monsters, not me…” trailing off when you realize that her questioning unintentionally brought up a fantastic point, and when you pair it with the incredibly tempting opportunity now that, aside from Andy, Logan is alone at last, you eagerly leap to your feet, “in fact, I’ll go test it right now. This is all getting far too suspicious for me anyway.”

Immediately noticing when the determination in your voice reaches your eyes, Haru can’t help but laugh at the newfound misfortune that he knows awaits his best friend, “this should be entertaining. What happened to all that patience, Builder?” 

Grumbling under your breath that he so aptly called your previous bluff, you mockingly parrot his remark over your shoulder, causing everyone to laugh in response. Knowing that they don’t want to miss even a fraction of what’s about to happen, the group all expectantly squirm upright in their seats, desperately hoping to get a better view.

Having had your fill of his wallflower attitude, you march up to Logan and make your demand, “is that how tonight's going to be then? What happened to all of that confidence earlier, hm? C'mon yakboy, I expected more from you… won't you dance with me?”

Logan's eyes widen as you approach him and his smile falters a little. Unbeknownst to you, you just requested the one thing that he can’t agree to. Forcing a chuckle, he politely waves a hand to settle you, “ah, no I… I don't dance… real kind of ya to ask though...” scrambling to use them as his backup once again, he swiftly references towards Owen and Justice who are standing just out of earshot, “why don't you let those two take you for a spin? Sure they'd be happy to oblige.”

Roguishly darkening your expression at his unsurprising reply, you hold your ground and fold your arms to show your immovability on the matter, “hmph, what a likely story.”

Andy chimes in as he leaves Logan's side, “pfft, a lame story is what it is… anybody with eyes can see that.” You watch perplexedly as he boldly moves past you two, stopping at nothing until he succeeds in his mission of getting to Jasmine. Though you can't hear their conversation, judging by the smile on their faces and the direction they start heading in, you safely assume that he asked her to dance and that she delightedly said yes. 

Biting your lip to contain your laughter, shocked by the sudden development, you raise your eyebrows defiantly to take advantage of the digressive situation, “see? Even Andy, our Andy, knows better. He plucked up the courage and now he's having a good time dancing with Jasmine. He did the hard part of evading her rejection, but I'm making things much easier on you because I already told you that I want to dance with you. I really do, Logan…” donning an assuaging front, you change your tone to be more sincere, “please, for me…?” 

Noticing you've embarrassed him slightly when he doesn't reply and his ears go pink, you eye him curiously and soften your assault with a dramatic, teasing sigh, “fine, be that way. As much as I want to, I won't force you.” Turning your attention towards your next target as he conveniently walks over, wanting to give Logan an out, you extend your hand wearing a winning grin to mask your disappointment, “Haru, perfect timing! Would you be so kind as to do me the honors? I know you're the man of the hour, but I hope you can spare enough time for at least one song.”

Sensing Logan's awkwardness, Haru chuckles and shoots him a scolding look as he takes your hand, gingerly escorting you away, “well, I thought you'd never ask.”

Eyeing him suspiciously with a slight chuckle while the new, slower song begins as you get out onto the dance floor, you imagine what Haru's reply to your mildly devious question will be, “so did you see that he needed rescuing or was that just another instance of your impeccable timing?” 

Breaking into a huge grin, he shrugs nonchalantly, “mhm… maybe a bit of both.”

You laugh a little and quizzically scrunch your eyebrows together, “uh huh… and if I ask you why he refuses to dance with me, you're going to say something about him inheriting his apparent two left feet from Howlett just like everything else, right?”

Haru starts to laugh and eagerly nods, causing you to laugh even harder, “ugh, Haru?! You weren't supposed to say yes!! Oh, Peach… he's hopeless.” You giggle heartily for a moment and cautiously use the opportunity to glance at Logan from across the room. Haru follows your eyes when you shake your head defeatedly after seeing that the ever faithful Owen and Justice have returned, “so be it… guess that means that I'm hopeless too.”

Patiently waiting for your entranced gaze to be satisfied, Haru chuckles when it appears that it may never be. Using the chance to bring up your interaction from the other morning now that you're alone in the hopes of learning the truth and regaining your attention, he drops his voice into a very hushed tone, “well that settles it, I knew you remembered.” 

Rattled by his prodding words, you hastily turn back to look at him and try to play your startled reaction off, “r-remember what, exactly…?” 

He quietly chuckles a bit harder when your cheeks flush a deep crimson and in a clever move to comfort you, he gently extends his arm to let you spin outwards and back again. Intentionally slowing down your ensuing movements so that they're no longer in time with the music, he creates a bubble for the two of you to talk privately amongst the already distracted crowd, “I promise that you don't have to say anything if you don't want to, but I… I have to ask before I leave… is it true?” 

Pressing your lips together in an anxious smile, you hesitate and then choose to test both of your memories as an excuse to confirm the reason for his question before simply thinking about it makes your nerves any worse, “now Haru, how am I supposed to answer you if I don't have the slightest clue what you're talking about?” 

Rolling his eyes with a grin, he scoffs playfully, “mhm… that's how it's gonna be, huh? Alright…” he inhales deeply and decides to humor your incredibly obvious ruse, “the other night, I couldn't sleep so I got up to get some water and I spotted the two of you asleep in the chairs. Truthfully, I was surprised to see you because I didn't realize that you had stayed. I was going to leave you alone, but when I started to make my way to the kitchen, a rather insistent Grace sounding voice in my head told me to put a blanket on you both. That was easy enough, but when I went to leave, you woke up and... we… talked… about… something.”

When he doesn’t give you the full story, you continue on with your coy charade, “that was really very sweet of you, but my memory is still so hazy. You gotta give me… something… or how else am I supposed to know what happened? I might remember… something… but, honestly… who can say?”

Haru scoldingly shakes his head, still somehow finding himself impressed by your usual stubbornness. Knowing that you're underestimating his own skillful tactics, he takes another deep breath and calmly replies, “would I be in trouble if I didn't?” 

The heat that quickly floods into your cheeks forces you to silently wave a white flag in surrender. Unable to conjure even the most pathetic of rebuttals, you slowly stop dancing and look at him with a heavy heart, “I need to go get… something…” you smirk dejectedly at the untimely joke, “don't go anywhere, please? It… it'll give you your answer.” 

Grateful that the party will carry on in your absence, once you’re outside, you whistle for your mount to meet you by the saloon doors and you dash home, coming back in equally short order. Standing on the dimly lit porch of the Blue Moon, mentally locked in a heated debate with yourself, you eventually relent with a shaky sigh. Clutching what you obtained from your residence against your chest, you timidly slip back inside. Haru, having continued to keep an eye out for you when you didn’t return right away, spots you enter and promptly makes his way over. 

“Here…” you say seriously as you hand him an unmarked envelope, “I want you to read this and… I know that I don’t deserve to ask you any more favors, but this will be the last one. I promise.”

Effectively terrified as he takes it from you thanks to that intimidating introduction, Haru naturally begins to open it and you shake your head, putting a hand on his to stop him, “wait… you only get this if you accept my three conditions…” he looks up at you more worriedly than before and nods, “one, you don’t read this until after you leave… two, you never show it to him… and three, if you find her or she finds you, I want you to give it to her. Please…? I-I know if she’s out there, she’ll find you in Atara.”

When it clicks that you’re talking about Grace, Haru’s eyes go wide and as you fight tears, you lean in and affectionately kiss his cheek, “thanks for the dance. Don’t let me monopolize you.”

Haru ruminatively watches you walk towards the bar, wholeheartedly uncertain how to proceed. After a small moment of reflection, he tucks the envelope into his jacket for safekeeping and follows you. The two of you feel rather melancholy now that the topic of Grace entered both of your minds, so even though you politely shoo him away once he reaches you, telling him not to trouble himself by staying with you, he wordlessly fills the seat beside you and hands you a drink, gently clinking the bottles together on your behalf when you take it. Understanding exactly what he's trying to do, you smirk and quietly thank him, scooting your chair just a bit closer to provide him with the same comfort. 

Enjoying the liquor and each other’s sincerely needed company, you sit in empathetic silence for a little while before a meandering Logan notices you together. Wondering why you’re finally sedentary and moreover, looking glum with his comparably gloomy best friend, he sets aside the metaphoric war you’ve been waging to investigate. Just as he arrives and realizes that something is actually going on when you both stay quiet, he readies himself to try and cheer the two of you up, but a new song begins to play in the background and quickly pulls your respective attentions.

Logan watches your eyes light up as you anxiously whirl around wearing an infectious grin and zero in on Cooper, “seriously, now?!”

Having detected your dispiritedness as well, Cooper took it upon himself to remedy it. Cooper jumps off of the stage and walks up to you with an extended hand, “c'mon lil’ lady… the time has come to prove ol’ Coop wrong.” 

Elsie giggles and playfully scolds him over the loud music, “awe, Pa… go easy on her!!!” 

Mabel hollers animatedly to encourage him, “get ‘er, Cooper! Show that girl how it's done!!” 

Narrowing your eyes at Cooper, you laugh and take his hand to accept his offer. The two of you draw the eyes of everyone in the saloon, though you're both already having too much fun to care as you launch into a feverish swing dance. The inspiration for this moment came from a conversation you had with Cooper when you first arrived in Sandrock. Mabel invited you over for dinner and when this song came on over the radio, you remarked how much fun it is to dance to, which caused Cooper to spout off in one of his famous tangents about what real dancing music is. Back then, he was still quite leery of you and did not hold back in sharing his opinion even though deep down, he actually agreed with you. Worried that you managed to make him hate you, the little disagreement was what actually cemented his likeness for you and you've grown quite close ever since. Some time after, you made a pact that whenever the opportunity presented itself, you'd settle the imaginary score to see who was right. 

The crowd roars and it only spurs you and Cooper on, fortuitously remedying Haru's spirit in the process as he stares in sheer amazement at the spectacle. Delighted that you’re both back to your usual selves, Logan chuckles and happily takes your vacated seat.

It doesn’t take long before you can’t catch your breath from how hard you’re laughing and though your little competition has been entertaining, you begrudgingly yield. Waving your hand with an exhausted huff, you whine through your hearty laughter, “Mabel, for the love of Light, take that man of yours back!! I can't keep up!!!”  

Playfully collapsing in a chair at the corner table next to the stage as Unsuur speedily stands to offer it to you while handing you a drink, you express your gratitude for the seat and that he saved you from having to fetch one yourself. Turning to watch Cooper and Mabel show you up, proving what years of faithful partnership will do, you giggle and excitedly observe as other pairs begin to join them. 

Appreciative of the resulting break, you find yourself finally starting to unwind while you chat with Zeke, Trudy, Mi-an, and Penny. Inspired by you and Cooper’s display, a little while later, Owen takes the stage and announces that it’s time for a dance that’s a longstanding Sandrock tradition. With excited gasps, almost out of reflex, you and Mi-an instantly stand to join in on the fun, subsequently convincing Penny to tag along. Logan sends Haru on his way with an impish wave when Elsie speeds over and tries to drag them both out onto the dance floor. 

Promising Penny that you’ll teach her, you tell Mi-an to go on without you, “since I don’t have time to explain the whole thing, you’re going to get the extremely short version. The moves are a combination of line and square dancing, do you know how to do either?” When she shakes her head, you giggle and tease her with a dramatic sigh, “of course you don’t... ah, who cares. You’re gonna do great, c’mon!” 

Once you tug her into place alongside you, you tell her to copy you as you work through the basic steps, simultaneously imparting the final portion of your hasty instructions, “okay, this is going to sound complicated but I promise that it’s really simple. See how everyone lined up into four rows? That actually doesn’t matter, but what does are the two people in front of you or behind you depending on where you are. Since we’re in the very back and at the end of the row, we only have to worry about Elsie and Haru. Think of the four of us like a square and since Haru is in front of you, you two are partners and Elsie and I are partners. Even though we’re all facing the stage, we’ll start rotating clockwise at certain points of the song and we’ll be trading spots with our partners every other turn. So the first time, you’ll switch with Haru and I’ll stay put, then I’ll switch with Elsie the next time and you stay still and by that point, we’ll all be facing the back of the saloon. You just go into the middle of our little square and swap with him as we turn. Make sense?”

Penny nods with a nervous smile, but you can tell that she’s terrified. You immediately giggle again and grab both of her shoulders, shaking her gently to get her to relax, “don’t you worry, Penny! C’mon, you got this!! It’s really fun and I promise that I'll be with you the whole time. When I’m not, Elsie will be and she’s absolutely the town's reigning master of this dance, so you’ll be in even better hands with her when we trade!” 

Elsie hears your comment and laughs, looking over her shoulder at both of you, “yeah, the Builder learned it from me when she first got here. You shoulda seen her, lookin’ all sad in the corner that she couldn’t join in. Now she’s just as good as the rest of us! She’s better than Haru, that’s for sure!”

Haru scoffs and chuckles, “hey! You never gave me some fancy lesson, what gives?”

The music kicks on and through your laughter at their antics, you look at Penny with an excited grin, “oh and one more thing I forgot to mention. It starts off slow, but it gets really, really fast by the end. You’ll barely have enough time to turn before you’re swapping again.” She gulps a little and you laugh harder, speedily linking an arm through hers to walk her through the steps once more as everyone else begins. 

When you scan the lambent rows for Logan and, as expected, find him instead on the sidelines not participating, you roll your eyes teasingly and he simply chuckles at your tacit disapproval, flashing you a cheesy grin. Enthralled by his ability to admire you from afar, he gradually watches you drop your guard and in his ever-plotting mind, he gets an incredibly mischievous idea. 

In the process of exchanging Penny for Haru, out of nowhere, a small rush of air hits your back as something is plopped onto your head. Haru’s eyes widen just as much as his smile does and judging by the stunned, ecstatic look on his face coupled with the familiar sensation of the object, you realize immediately what it is. Fluidly breaking the pattern to spin in the direction that you want to, you instantly lock eyes with Logan and his rather smug grin. Without skipping a beat as you continue to dance, you grab the crown of his hat and nestle it more securely against your hair, illustrating your acceptance of his very cunning declaration. Shaking his head slowly at you when you take advantage of your intimate connection by casting him a taunting glare that demands he keeps his eyes fixated on you now that he’s so openly laid his claim, he manages to stop chuckling long enough to let out a wolf whistle that makes your already blushing cheeks an even deeper, marbled maroon. 

Fretfully looking at Haru for help wearing an absurdly large smile, you’re all but speechless, “did, did he just…?”

Haru nods vigorously, helplessly beginning to laugh when you do, “he did. I-I can’t believe he did, but… he did.”

Whimpering a little when you see that Penny saw the commotion and is giving you an impressed, eyebrows-raised smile, you stammer through your reply to Haru in disbelief, “h-he, he hasn’t… he hasn't even had anything to drink tonight, has he??”

“Nope!” Haru exclaims excitedly. 

Groaning at his answer, you laugh even harder at his infuriating amusement, “then what in Light’s name just happened?!” Haru shrugs and you instantly narrow your eyes at him, dramatically enunciating every word to illustrate your lighthearted panic, “what do you know…?!”

“I actually don’t. Trust me, I really wish I did…” Haru swiftly replies and decides to use the song’s placement switch cue as an excuse to drive the message Logan just delivered home, “but whatever he’s doing, it’s clearly working.” 

You scoldingly shout his name over the music, pretending to be furious, but the two of you just laugh harder. Huffing besottedly, you agree to refocus yourself on finishing the dance to make Logan’s efforts worthwhile for both of you. 

The second the dance ends, though somehow it seems like it was the longest and shortest song of your life, you’re quickly swarmed by a substantial number of your friends who are outright begging to hear what happened. Quelling your nerves by effectively ignoring every single one of them as you part the group, moving directly towards Logan, you elect to give Haru special attention in the hopes of bolstering your allegiance to him and your friendship in this intrinsically pivotal moment. Intentionally bumping into his shoulder with yours as you walk by, you smirk and mumble, “well, my dear Haru, that was Grace worthy. She’d be pretty proud of you right about now.”

As you approach Logan, you do everything in your power to shake your nerves, but the closer you get, the more you realize that he really got you this time. Your typically hidden mischief is challenging enough to navigate, though the silver lining has always been that its remained private. After that stunt, it seems that he’s quite serious about publicly saying his piece tonight. 

Leaning heavily against the bar top on his elbow with his ankles crossed and an annoyingly cocky smile, he shamelessly continues to marvel at you until he finally stands by pushing himself upright. Tutting his tongue once with a shake of his head when he meets you, knowing that he undoubtedly won this round thanks to the sheepish look on your face, he keeps his voice lethally gruff and low, “still perfect, darlin’...”

Looking luridly up at him, you remove his hat and coyly press it against his chest to return it, “sorry, yakboy. I'm afraid that's not true…” ensuring that you don't flinch when his fingertips find yours to avoid showing even a hint of your defeat, your eyes darken and you lower your own voice into a suggestive tone, “you forgot the cape.”

He chuckles amorously as you continue your heart pounding standoff and for a fleeting moment, you see him crumble. Satisfied that you seem to have reclaimed some ground, you retreat slightly and peer past him at his two guilty counterparts, who appear to be equally proud of his actions, and scold them with a wagging finger, “control him, would you?” 

Justice and Owen hastily try to explain that they had no part in it, which makes the entire event more maddening. The idea that Logan managed to be that brash without them only further cements his victory. What's worse, little do you know, that when Pablo suggested that the three troublemakers were up to something earlier on, though you suspected as much, he was actually right. Their persistent chatter and stares are a direct result of a frenzied night of plotting, one that Owen hopes will aid Logan in his pursuit of winning your affections. The suspicious restlessness that you've witnessed increase throughout the evening is just about to reach a breaking point when you slip past them and enter the kitchen, unintentionally setting their carefully crafted plan into motion.

You lean heavily against the counter by the sink and inhale a glass of water, immensely grateful for the moment of peace. Though you knew when you came in here that it wouldn't last long with the way things have been going, aside from the quiet swing of the door, you can physically feel that it's Logan from across the room as he casually walks in behind you. 

“So, tell me yakboy… are you still committed to being a man in the shadows for the evening or are you just following me around now? That was pretty bold, even for you. I think I'm starting to get whiplash…" you spin with a mischievous smile and challenge him more directly now that you're alone, “and to be clear, I don't mind either way, but it would be nice to know seeing how you've managed to evade me all night with those two planted at your side.”

Knowing that his falsely confident guise has immediately shattered into oblivion under the weight of your flirtatious posturing, he keeps his gaze fixated on the ground as he makes his way over to you and shakes his head wearing an elated grin, “hm… seems like there's no winnin’ with you tonight, is there? Might be talk of the town an’ all, but…” he lifts his head and shyly meets your eyes, searching them slowly, “I came to ask if, uh… if I could steal you away for a bit… I was thinkin’ we could both use a breather.” 

Staring him down with an unyielding curiosity, you furrow your eyebrows together and smirk, making it clear that you refuse to give him an inch of breathing room. When you begin to ask what his angle is or if they sent him in here after you, he cuts you off and continues, “saw your energy wear thin some time ago…” he chuckles again when you raise your eyebrows in surprise, “yes, I was payin’ attention… so, it got me thinkin’ that you'd appreciate a break. Plus, I gotta get Andy home an’ I'm not plannin’ on takin’ Haru away from his own party… figured I could give ya back some of that stuff you let me borrow the other day while we're at it. Afterwards you can come back… join in on the fun… promise it won't take long.” He references towards the door with a nod while giving you a daring look, one that wonders if you think the two of you will be able to slip away undetected, “whaddya say?”

Biting your lip anxiously, you shrug with a teasing, weary sigh and intentionally brush against his arm as you pass by, slowly making your way to the door, “mhm… fine… let's go then. I don't want to miss too many good songs…”

He grins at your inviting touch and scoldingly shakes his head with a deep, content exhale. Hanging back for a moment to let you get a bit of a lead before following your path, he bides his time by enjoying the lingering scent of your perfume, welcoming the alluring dizziness that it brings.

When Logan catches up to you outside after retrieving Andy, you smile a little to yourself, realizing just how much you actually needed some air. Dropping your guard to show your appreciation now that you're away from the party, you look up at him happily, “I wanted to thank you for noticing, by the way… I honestly wasn't sure how much longer I'd survive in there…”

Logan laughs softly and nods, pausing to help steady you as you slip off your shoes, “Amirah and Pablo had you on some sort of crusade, didn't they?”

You wince, swiftly remembering that they're the original reason for your boldness tonight, “I haven't the faintest clue what you're talking about…” you giggle a little, unable to conceal your nerves as you attempt to guess what he's getting at, “seriously, what, uh… what do you mean?” 

He shrugs and breezily scoops up a falling behind Andy, holding him securely in his arms. You smile widely when Andy rests his cheek on Logan's shoulder, the entire scene quickly beginning to tug at your heart strings. Trying to gauge just how tired the poor kid is as Logan replies, you return your attention to him when he doesn't give you the inquisitive answer that you were expecting, “nothin’... jus’ seemed like they were makin' sure you had fun tonight is all.” 

“Ah…” you nod, averting your now timid gaze, “yeah… they were.” Steering the conversation back to him to avoid addressing things further and reclaim the bravery you've shown up until now, you let your voice mellow into a contented tone, “soooo, be honest… did you have a good time?”

Logan smirks and greets your eyes fondly, “as a matter of fact I did. I may not know what parties are like in Highwind, but I certainly know we Sandrockers throw a good one.”

You giggle and shake your head, “oh no, let me set the record straight. Highwind has nothing on our parties here. Highwind wishes their parties came remotely close to being as much fun as Sandrock's… especially when we don't wreck the local saloon.”

Both of you share a moment of laughter as you continue to walk side by side through the empty, dimly lit street. Even after your amusement wanes and you slip into a comfortable silence, the two of you feel unexpectedly more at ease than you have in quite some time. Once you reach Logan's place and you move to help him with the door, you chuckle under your breath when he tilts his shoulder down and rolls his eyes to point out that Andy has already fallen asleep.  

“Seems like he had a good time too…” you muse happily. 

Entering the house with him, the door creaks softly to a close as you both prudently stay as quiet as possible in an effort to not wake Andy. You follow Logan upstairs and instead of going directly into the kitchen to wait for him, you pause and cautiously peek into Andy and Haru’s room. 

Now that you're alone, the pressure to uphold the evening’s charade recedes and you find yourself at the mercy of your heart. Leaning on your hip in the darkened doorway, you slowly start to smile at the scene unfolding in front of you as Logan tucks Andy in, taking extra care to ensure he’s comfortable. Despite the vast amount of time that you’ve spent in their company, the more intimate extent of Logan and Andy’s relationship is still rather elusive to you. With Haru always around to jump in, quiet moments between them like this are a rarity to witness. Though you’ve expended a great deal of mental energy trying to remember the morning Andy crawled into bed with you and Logan, trying to satisfy your larger curiosity, you’re unfortunately still plagued by its ambiguity. Knowing without a shadow of doubt that Andy considers Logan a father figure, regardless if either one of them acknowledges it, you hope that maybe someday, if you’re lucky enough to assume a similar role, you and Logan can complete that incomplete part of his life together.

“You do know just how much that kid adores you, right?” You whisper, getting Logan to smile a little as he carefully tugs the door shut, “how is he, really? I know he's acting tough, but this has to be so hard on him.” 

Logan nods as you both move down the hallway towards the kitchen, “he's doin’ better than I thought. He still ain't fessed up to bein’ sad, though. Might change after vistin’ the hideout tomorrow.” 

Pensively slowing your pace, you press your eyebrows together and softly bring up an even harder topic, “how are you doing…?” 

Having expected you to ask at some point, he pauses with a small shrug and tries to avoid letting you in, just for the remainder of tonight, “I'm happy for ‘im… an’ it's not like he's goin’ far. He already made me promise to write...” you stay quiet and he meets your eyes, but swiftly turns away when he realizes that you're not fooled by his casual deflecting, “c'mon, don't gimme that look. We got time. Let's… let's not sour the night by worryin’, hm?” 

Exhaling a little in acceptance as you set your shoes down, you nod, “you're right. He's having fun, so should we.” 

In the process of opening a cupboard while you speak to retrieve what you let him borrow, he suddenly hesitates because of your comment and you hear him smirk before he hurriedly places the items on the counter. Unbeknownst to you, in spite of the now slightly doleful mood, you just provided him the perfect segue to follow through with what he's been preparing to do all night.

Furrowing your eyebrows together tightly, you chuckle at his temperament change, “uh, is everything okay? Y'know you have to actually hand those to me to give them back, right…?” 

Nodding as he glances at you, he slips out of the kitchen and disappears for a moment before returning with a small radio. He smiles a little as he pops in a cassette tape that Owen gave him and switches it on, gradually turning the volume down to a more subdued level. 

{ Blue Moon - Dean Martin (originally sang by Billy Eckstine) }

Blue moon

When the song begins, you giggle and warily watch him as he approaches, his casual demeanor throwing you for a loop. Nervously shrinking away from him the closer he gets, you break into a huge, anxious smile, “whaaat is happening…?” 

You saw me standing alone

Logan's semblance remains almost unreadable even after he reaches you, though through his unwavering focus you detect a hint of mischief. Without blinking, he gracefully takes your hand and lifts his arm up to spin you in place. 

Without a dream in my heart

Your eyes widen and you giggle even more, incapable of containing your still hushed excitement, “is this… is this actually happening?! Are you going to check the final box to be the perfect yakboy…?”

Without a love of my own

He firmly tugs on your hand to pull you in close with an impish grin while he smoothly places his other on your lower back as he guides your movements. Sneering at him playfully, you oblige and simultaneously tuck your hip in as you move your own free hand to his side to clutch the fabric of his shirt. Taking into account his strange behavior tonight and how conveniently serendipitous this is, you start to realize that his previous refusal was intentional and that there really must've been a plan after all. Helplessly smitten with him for acting this way, you harness the very last ounce of rebellion you have left to tease him, though your lovelorn voice gives your true sentiments away, “and here I've spent the whole night thinking that you just didn't want to dance with me…”

Blue moon, you knew just what I was there for

Watching the wheels turn in your head while you put the pieces together, knowing that you're far too smart for your own good, he chuckles quietly and redirects the conversation as he gazes down at you with a warm, endearing expression, “I couldn't leave my reputation on the line, but… truthfully… I'd only ever do this for you. I-I figured that it'd be real selfish of me if I didn't make good on that offer of yours earlier. You were quite convincin’, long before Andy went an’ showed me up. I knew I shouldn't miss out on my chance to take the most beautiful woman at the party for a spin, even if it is for jus’ one song…” his smile flashes a little wider as he surveys you more seriously, “it may not've seemed like it, but I've been waitin’ to get you all to myself since I laid eyes on ya earlier… an’ you know that I'm not usually a patient man.”  

You heard me saying a prayer for 

Taking a subtly unsteady step as you catch yourself from swooning at his words, you look down and shake your head with a massive grin. Shyly meeting his eyes again, you find yourself unequivocally at their mercy, “oh, you spoil me, but…” you smirk softly and lightly press your eyebrows together, “I would've left the moment you asked.” With a deep inhale, your already faint voice drifts into an enchanted whisper, “and somehow you managed to do it again, didn’t you…? I love this song…”

Someone I really could care for

As you slowly sway together in the low kitchen light, Logan keeps you at a fairly respectful distance, but every now and then he surprises you with a gentle flair and you smile bigger each time at how effortless he manages to make it seem for a man who claims he doesn't dance. 

And then there suddenly appeared before me
The only one my arms could ever hold
I heard somebody whisper, "please adore me"
And when I looked, the moon had turned to gold
Blue moon
Now I'm no longer alone
Without a dream in my heart
Without a love of my own

The song lulls into a less lively tempo and suddenly you can't resist the idea of melting into his embrace, your body craving to be against his. Timidly resting your cheek on his chest, you close the already diminished gap and nestle your interlocked hands in between the two of you. Logan affectionately watches as you shut your eyes with a soft, content sigh and his sensibilities all but falter. Permitting himself to succumb to his own mental bliss, he securely wraps his arm around your waist and hangs his head just low enough so that his lips are lightly touching the top of your hair. 

And then there suddenly appeared before me
The only one my arms will ever hold
I heard somebody whisper, "please adore me"
And when I looked, the moon had turned to gold
Blue moon
Now I'm no longer alone
Without a dream in my heart
Without a love of my own
Without a love of my own
Without a love of my own… 

After the song comes to an end, you force your eyes open to look back up at him, immovable as you scrunch your eyebrows together, your voice as weak as you are, “alright… y-you win… I'll… I'll never question your authenticity again…” 

Carefully bringing your hands to his lips, he tenderly kisses your knuckles and chuckles very softly, mumbling his reply against them, “mhm-hm… thank you…” he inhales shakily, gazing down at you with immense fondness, his voice to dropping into a deep, immeasurable tone, one that makes him almost sound breathless, “couldn't have asked for a better partner… for… jus’ now and… for… everythin’ else we've been through…” 

You blush a dark crimson, unsure what to do next. As you grapple with the lingering sensation of his lips, you ponderously shake your head and search his features, “honestly, that… that was… so sweet… I…” your words stumble out as your mind is defeated by the welcoming shades of blue in his eyes. Losing yourself in them, your train of thought shrinks further and further away the longer you continue to explore their deepest reaches. 

Logan knits his eyebrows together tightly, his heart just about leaping out of his chest. He dares himself once more to recreate a moment that you shared so long ago as he tucks your hair behind your ear and cups your cheek in his hand. Intently observing every movement he makes, you exhale softly against his palm as you lean into his affectionate touch, your eyes fluttering lightly when they return to the safety of his. The quiet hum of the radio fades in your ears, overcome by the pounding of your anxious heart. After he devotedly rubs his thumb across your cheek, his hand shifts to rest on your neck as it drifts down and forward, his fingertips trailing unhurriedly along your jawline as you find yourself being gently pinned against the counter. You watch him trace over you with a clear longing, his gaze eventually settling on your lips. The intensity of his stare causes yours to softly part and your breath hitches when you feel a small tug on your chin as he tilts it upwards, gradually bringing you to him.

“Logan…?” 

Captivated by the spell you've found yourselves under, it doesn't register that the voice isn't a part of the music in the background. When the voice pipes up for a second time, though you're devastatingly close to fulfilling your deepest desires with your hearts unconditionally surrendered, you both snap out of it and in your startled condition, the two of you fretfully turn to find Andy standing in the doorway, rubbing his tired eyes. You worriedly glance at one another and only realize when the tips of your noses brush together that you're far too close for comfort with him present, so you each take small steps to put a respectable space between you.

Forcing a flustered smile, still consumed by an aching daze, you eye Andy curiously and desperately try to conceal the dizziness in your voice, “you alright, kid…? I… I hope we didn't wake you…”

When Andy shyly explains that he had a bad dream, both of you know right away that it's because Haru is leaving. Logan sighs softly and begins to console Andy, but the front door downstairs squeaks open, causing the three of you to look in that direction. Haru quietly walks upstairs and pauses on the landing, his expression growing more and more apprehensive as he observes each of you individually and then the scene as a whole. Continuing his timid approach, he eyes the two of you suspiciously and Andy races over to him, hugging his legs tightly just as he crests the final step. Logan swiftly uses the distraction to turn off the radio. 

With a dull grunt as he's tackled, Haru anxiously examines Andy and runs a hand through his hair to soothe him, steadying his tiny frame by clasping onto one of his shoulders, “Andy what–...?” Haru looks back up at both of you and inquires hesitantly, “what's… going… on…?” 

You and Logan turn to each other to come up with an explanation, finding yourselves temporarily dumbfounded, but ever so slowly you break into easy smiles, instantly agreeing to deal with whatever that was later, content for now that it happened at all. You'd be foolish to not understand what that little happenstance implied and in your resolute secrecy, you both decide to save creating a private moment like it for next time, just as you always do. 

Swallowing your jovial emotions, you nonchalantly bend down to retrieve your shoes, “actually, I, uhm… I was just headed home. I promised Justice that I'd patrol with him in the morning. We haven't had the chance for a while and I don't want to show up too tired…” 

Logan nods and presses his eyebrows together faintly at you, probingly stating his question while silently asking another, one that seeks to know if you're alright, “we'll still see you tomorrow…?”

Trying to convey that in spite of the interruption you won't be so easily scared off, you let your smile relax and become more genuine, “I wouldn't miss it for the world.”

Imparting goodnights to each of them as you slip by and down the stairs, Haru picks Andy up and looks at Logan quizzically after the front door shuts behind you, “seriously, is everything okay?” 

Logan smirks softly as he puts away the items you forgot and are still laying out on the counter, his voice revealing that he's lost in a trancelike state, “yeah… everythin’s fine…” he pats Haru's shoulder as he waltzes past him, “c'mon, we should all be gettin’ to bed anyway.”

Haru bewilderedly raises his eyebrows and stands completely still until Logan's bedroom door clicks closed, not quite sure how to process any of it. Andy tightens his anxious grip on Haru's neck and he sighs resignedly as he makes his way into their room, “alright, Andy… he's right, it's late. Let's go to bed… you can sleep with me tonight, okay?” 

Once he has Andy tucked back into bed, Haru decides to stay up a little while longer after suddenly feeling the need to read the letter that you gave him. He sits down by the window to use the moonlight to see and muses to himself as he cautiously unfolds the bundle of paper:

Here goes nothing…

You can’t hide from it forever, Builder. 

⋆⁺₊⋆☾⋆₊⁺⋆

The next day, without discussion, you and Logan put aside your feelings to be there for Haru. Passing off last night as just another one of your lovelorn tribulations, the two of you seamlessly negate any tension between you when you arrive at the hideout that evening for the party. Regardless of the gravely urgent questions that each of you have, ones that are begging to be addressed, it’s far too bittersweet knowing that this is the last time your little gang will be together for a while to not enjoy every minute of the occasion and you both fully intend on doing just that. 

After you're informed of what's been going on before you got there, you accompany Haru to help him pack, leaving Logan and Andy by the fire to tend to dinner. Listening to him reminisce about the various items that he finds along the way is hard enough, but when Haru tells you that he's going to give you Merle, you almost break down in tears. Your final stop is at he and Logan’s old beds and you take a seat on Haru’s as he fiddles with some of his belongings in the dresser drawers. Aside from the notable layer of dust that has accumulated, you look around nostalgically while you wait and find yourself surprised at how untouched everything is. 

Well, at least Logan's reading light is off tonight… you tease to yourself as you sneakily inspect his side of things.

Haru's mood has sobered slightly from being reminded of their time on the run and he has been silent since you got to this more personal corner of the hideout. Without realizing it, you inadvertently cheer him up when you suddenly start laughing under your breath at Logan and Andy's seemingly never ending, childish argument about what the correct way to cook the food is. Glancing over his shoulder at them, Haru grins and shakes his head as he puts another item into his bag, “so, Builder… about that letter…” 

Looking hastily back at him as your cheeks turn bright red, you narrow your eyes and giggle, “ugh, I knew it…! I knew I shouldn't have given it to you until tonight…” you tut scoldingly at him, “such a shame you didn’t wait… it would’ve been the best reading material on the train to keep you company. Depending on your reaction, might’ve earned a few concerned stares too. That would’ve really set a precedent for your new adventures, eh?”

Closing the drawer that he was rummaging in, he chuckles heartily and plops down beside you, “ah… I’m sorry. I couldn’t bear the thought of missing yours, I’m afraid.” 

Noting the sadness in his tone, you bump him playfully with your shoulder and look down nervously at your hands. Fidgeting with them as a pathetic distraction, you lose the tenacity to crack any more deflecting jokes when the repercussions of his now complete knowledge sinks in. 

“Thank you for trusting me with it…” Haru says softly, “and for taking care of them.” 

You smirk and look their way again, “I won’t let them out of my sight. I promise.” Turning towards him after a small pause, you exhale shakily and put on a smile when you see him instantly notice your watery eyes, “I really am going to miss you, Haru.”

Pulling you into a tight, immovable hug, he solemnly furrows his eyebrows together and you hear his voice break as he replies, “I’m going to miss you too.” 

Unaware of the tender moment, Andy hollers that dinner is ready and Logan looks over just in time to catch a glimpse of you reluctantly letting go of each other. Preoccupied by the ensuing conversation, you tell them that you’ll be right there. Logan watches you affectionately straighten Haru’s hat and exchange a few quiet words. The two of you stand from the bed and Haru says something that makes you smile as you nod and wipe a tear off of your cheek. Though you appear to follow Haru’s lead at first, you glance intently at the other side of the cavern and hesitate, stopping yourself at the edge of the stairs. Following your new sightline curiously, Logan immediately realizes that you’re looking at the canyon opening, the very spot where it all began. Devotedly trying to understand what you’re thinking as he witnesses a fleeting grin wash across your face, he sees you hang your head to compose yourself and slowly continue to make your way back.

Sitting in the spot that they saved for you between Logan and Haru, the four of you enjoy dinner, even though Logan did indeed burn it, and as one does when sharing a meal around a campfire, the boys launch into a prolific bout of storytelling. Highly amused by the mischief that they managed to get themselves into, you sit back and listen to every word with overwhelming contentment.   

Eventually, when the conversation and laughter digress as the reality of why you’re here takes center stage, Logan shoots you a look to give Haru his gift. Presenting him with the goggles that you made for him, you do your best not to get emotional, but Haru’s resulting smile and excitement cause you to well up all over again. Logan chuckles at you as you try to play it off, but quickly finds himself in the same boat.

Huffing lightly before clearing his throat to reclaim control over his teetering voice, Logan begins to make an unofficial speech, “Haru, remember not to get too lost in yer books, alright? Go out an' make some friends, too. Join the... science club or somethin'...” he subconsciously glances down at you and smiles faintly as the words leave his lips, “an' hey, maybe you'll meet a special someone…”

Noticing Logan’s slip and where this is going, Haru smirks and gives the two of you a teasing look as you turn to him as well, “you can't force love, though…”

Urgently shaking his head, Logan sits up a bit farther in his seat and you lean back some to provide him with a better view of Haru, “I ain't sayin' force anything, I'm sayin' just put yourself out there. Can't meet your soulmate if you don't leave the house.”

Exceedingly grateful that Logan can’t see your face when your eyes widen at the term “soulmate”, you rapidly remind yourself that he isn’t talking about you and that his advice isn’t about your situation, though Haru’s stifled smile informs you that he thought the exact same thing. Letting your hair craftily fall to obscure your reddening cheeks, you avert your gaze and sit very still, deciding that staring at the ground is much safer than looking at either of them right now. 

Andy, your usual internal monologue savior, chimes in, “aw, Haru's afraid to talk to girls? Don't worry, pal, you're lookin' at a bonafide, one-of-a-kind, dead to rights lady-killer…”

“Hm...? Oh, you mean... yourself,” Haru sneers at him, “as I recall, the first time you met Jasmine, she cried and ran off screaming…”

Timidly becoming as red as you, Andy backpedals and you giggle softly, trying to avoid thinking about how funny it is that he’s in the same predicament as you, “what? I never told you that! Uh.... I mean, you musta heard wrong. Nah, that weren't me... musta been some other handsome guy…”

Logan laughs heartily and shakes his head at Andy’s woeful lie, “yeah, right…!”

Stammering as he replies, Andy whines and folds his arms to pout at their teasing, “well! All's I'm sayin' is... the greater point to be made is... when do we get to be a normal family, huh?”

“We don't.” 

Turning towards Logan curiously, wholeheartedly intrigued by his statement and the calmness in his voice as he answered, you grow fairly nervous when you discover that he’s already looking at you. 

Smirking softly at your confused expression, Logan’s fond gaze lingers on you before it returns to Andy, “but we get to have a family. And you get to have a normal life from now on. Just ain't the normal you mighta been thinkin' of.”

Andy mulls the idea around in his head while Logan picks up his drink and raises it, resuming the delivery of his heartwarming message, “Haru... Brother... I dragged you into more muck than I ever coulda imagined. You stuck by me the whole way. Now, you walk your own path. When you leave, never look back. This is your ride, an' this is where Andy an' I hop off. But no matter where you go, you'll always be kin.”

Haru sighs shakily and follows suit, lifting his own glass, “Logan, I never regretted a single moment.”

Swiftly grabbing his drink to copy them, Andy rushes over and stands as tall as he can to match the height of theirs, “don't forget me!”

One by one, three of the most important people in your life all turn their attention to you. Puffing your cheeks out a little at their unexpected acknowledgement, you grin and shake your head as you look from left to right at Haru, then Andy, and finally Logan as you impart your own sentiments, raising yours last, “to Haru, the gang, and the end of an era… I honestly don’t know where I’d be without you boys. Cheers.” 

Feeling rather sentimental after the toast ends, Logan leans over and whispers low in your ear to address your circumstances next, “walk with me a minute?”

Watching as you cautiously agree and depart, Haru finds himself smiling while he entertains Andy, keeping him busy to grant the two of you some privacy. 

It’s about time, Logan… he gently scolds in his head, you’ve waited long enough to ask her. 

Intentionally stalling until you get further away, Logan glances over his shoulder and smiles at Haru’s considerate distracting of Andy, “you and Haru seemed to be gettin’ on well earlier.” 

Remembering the reason for your heartfelt conversation, you sigh dejectedly, “we always do. I'm happy for him, but I'm going to miss him so much… I can only imagine how you're feeling right now.” 

He smirks, raising an eyebrow, “hm…? What makes you say that?”

“I know I tried to bring it up yesterday, but somehow you seem to be doing much better than I am… how is that right? You just about made me cry with that speech of yours and it would not have been the first time that that’s happened tonight…” you giggle and whimper playfully, “I’m a mess.” 

Logan chuckles softly and shrugs, “honestly? I'm a little relieved he's goin’... I know he's been stayin’ for Andy and I, but it's time for ‘im to live his own life… he's certainly done enough puttin’ mine back together… a-an’ I know he's gonna be real happy in Atara, somethin’ tells me all that fancy livin’ is gonna grow on ‘im…” 

You giggle again and nod, “yeah, I've had that sneaky suspicion myself. I guess only time will tell, huh?” Looking up at him, you widen your eyes dramatically, “oh and also, did you know he was leaving me Merle? I can't believe he did that…”

Completely caught off-guard, Logan falters and slows his pace slightly as he rapidly tries to figure out why Haru kept his decision a secret, “n-no, no he didn’t…” he stares at you a bit more intently and when you attempt to remedy his confused expression with a warm smile, the reason he was the last to know becomes clear, “Rambo’s gonna be lost without ‘er… might wanna keep one of them stalls at your place open… jus’ in case. Got a feelin’ he’ll have us swingin’ by more often.” 

It’s as if you read his mind because you quickly reach the same, inconspicuous conclusion and suddenly, the thought of Rambo being at your house feels like something permanent. Agreeing to harbor the sentiment for the time being, you satisfy your subconscious by voicing the appealing idea in your head:

As long as it means that you come too… 

Returning your attention to the mysterious path you’re being led down, you blush a little at the nostalgic sight that greets you, “ah, so this is where we’re going… I guess you saw me looking over here earlier, didn’t you?” Stepping up to the canyon opening’s ledge with him, you sigh contentedly as you take it in, “I didn’t realize how much I missed this view…”

He chuckles quietly and nods, “I might’ve… but, I’ve… I’ve been doin’ the same. We ain’t been back since that night. Not together, anyhow…” 

“It’s amazing how much one night can change you…” you smirk and dare yourself to look at him, “I mean where would we be right now if I wasn’t such a cry baby and made my way out here?” You start to laugh together and you shrug, turning to watch the windmill slowly spin in the evening breeze, “it was arguably lifetimes ago, but somehow it feels like it was only yesterday.” 

Inhaling sharply as he musters the courage to begin the conversation that he wants to, he nods again and fleeting follows your gaze before returning to you, “I camped out on this ledge when I was ‘ere alone, waitin’ for y’all to come get me after makin’ your decision… it… it only felt right, but it… well, it wasn’t the same without you.” 

Anxiously skewing your smile to the side, you stay silent and wait patiently for him to continue as you let your mind wander through your fond memories of that night. 

“There's that look again…” he says softly, besottedly admiring your features.

You raise an eyebrow curiously and glance over at him, “hm, what look?” 

“The other day, when we finished gettin’ through the tunnel an’ reached the southern Eufuala… it’s nice to see ya like this. It’s one of my favorites.”

“What? How can you possibly have a favorite expression of mine…?”

“You look happy.”

Blushing faintly with a shy grin, you avert your gaze and timidly push some dirt around with your boot, “that's because I am happy...” looking back up at him, you feel as though your heart may very well beat out of your chest, “are you happy?”

He nods and gives a soft, distracted, “mhm-hm” as his eyes land on your lips. 

“Peach, don't you start…” you chuckle as you forcibly tear your eyes away from his, recommitting yourself to staring into the canyon, “we are not talking about it. Not here, not tonight.” 

Moving in closer to stand behind you, he smoothly runs his hands down from your shoulders to your wrists with a gentle laugh, “talk ‘bout what? I didn't say anythin’...” 

You scoff and helplessly start to giggle while you do everything in your power to keep a straight face and ignore the myriad of goosebumps that form from his enticing touch, “whatever, you implied it…” he suddenly goes quiet, carefully inching further until his chest is pressing against your back and all you can do is breathlessly scold him as your eyelids flutter, threatening to drift completely closed, “and you once called me trouble…” 

Leaning down dangerously close to your face as you wordlessly surrender, he halts just shy of your cheek and lightly strokes the edge of one of your wrists with his index finger, “will you come somewhere with me tomorrow…?” 

“Oh, how convenient…” you giggle under your breath as you shrink away from him, trying to retain your rapidly shrinking sanity, “where exactly?”

After he reluctantly lets you go, Logan finally extends his invitation, “I got a tip from some tourists that someone's been usin' my name to scare people out in some cave ruins. I can't let that stand now, can I? Plannin' to go check it out. I'm missin' a partner, though.”

Your eyes widen in shock and your rapt smile falls away, “are you serious? Does Haru know?”

Swiftly devising a lie to prevent you from asking too many questions, he shakes his head, “no, I didn’t want ‘im worryin’ before tomorrow, one less thing he’s gotta have on his mind.” 

Frowning a little, you nod faintly in agreement, “probably wise of you.”

With a shy shrug, he proceeds, “so? Wanna come with? Always good to have someone like yourself watchin' my six.”

Detecting his nerves for a small moment, you nod more earnestly, “of course I’ll go with you. Thanks for thinking of me.”

Feeling a massive rush of relief, he absentmindedly moves towards you again and you start to chuckle, shaking your head as you race to maintain a healthy distance for both of your sakes, “alright seriously, I-I better get going. Andy might explode if you spend five more seconds with me. I’ll… I'll see you in the morning…” when he doesn’t stop his pursuit and his lazy, impish smile gradually grows bigger and bigger at your blushing cheeks, you decide to mess with him and pretend to be concerned, pointing up at his hat, “hey, you actually have something…”

Just for a second, he buys your ploy and stands still to let you approach instead, but your playful smile escapes onto your lips once you get close enough and he laughs, hurriedly trying to back away as you rush in, “oh no, I ain’t fallin’ for–...!”

You jump up to yank his hat down over his eyes and laugh even harder, scrambling to evade his fevered attempts at grabbing you, “that’s what you get, yakboy… cut it out!!!”

Running a little to get a lead, knowing that you've asked for it now, you squeal through your laughter when it takes him mere seconds to catch up to you. Almost successfully managing to pick you up off the ground as punishment, Logan notices at the last moment that your incredibly unsubtle antics have pulled Haru and Andy's attention. He immediately halts his pursuit and plays it off surprisingly well, which only makes your laughter worse. Behaving yourselves by walking shoulder to shoulder the rest of the way, you both try your very best to hide your flushed, guilty faces as you return to the campfire. When the boys turn elsewhere, highly disinterested in the previously flirtatious scene, they provide you with a final, fleeting opportunity to elbow Logan in the ribs for good measure before you exchange your goodbyes and depart. 

Waiting until you’re far enough away, Haru turns to Logan, “what did she say?”

Plopping down by the fire with a huff, Logan grins, “yes, of course.”

Haru chuckles and internally celebrates, “it's perfect, it's what you two love doing and once you settle it like you always do, well… you tell her and… that's the end of it. Easy.”

Logan glances in your direction and sobers slightly when he realizes that you’re gone. Despite the win, he’s still very nervous and Haru knows it. Logan’s demeanor triggers the memory of him doing the very same thing that first morning and, in the spirit of refusing to let things slide this time, Haru pipes up, “Logan, I swear if you don't do something and I come back to the two of you still like this…?”

Logan smiles anxiously, rubbing his hand across the back of his neck, “well… it… it uh, almost happened yesterday… a-at the house. I didn't wanna tell ya… i-it was Owen's idea anyway, remember…?” He sighs uncomfortably and shrugs as he lets his arm fall defeatedly, “look, I'm... I'm jus’ not good at this stuff… but maybe you're right. I don’t see how tomorrow can go wrong.”

With a hearty laugh, Haru pats Logan's shoulder playfully, “oh, I beg to differ buddy. You've had her wrapped around your finger since you met her. Trust me, you're obviously doing something right.”

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦