Chapter Text
Michael “Robby” Robinavitch had met Andrew “Pope” Cody one fateful night at a bar in Pittsburgh.
Andrew was sitting alone at the bar, a beer in front of him, staring ahead at the wall in front of him. Robby was instantly drawn to him. He had dark, thick curly hair and a serious brooding look on his face.
As if sensing that he was being stared at, he turned his head in Robby’s direction. Robby flinched slightly at having been caught, but took a breath and made his way over. He sat near the man, one stool between them to give him space, and held out his hand. “Michael. Robby.” Let him run with which ever name he wanted to call him.
The other man quickly broke eye contact, shifting his eyes back toward the wall but not turning his head away. His eyes flitted back to Robby’s like he wanted to look him in the eye, but he quickly glanced away again.
“Andrew,” he finally murmured in a gravelly voice. He glanced at Robby’s hand but didn’t reach out to reciprocate.
Robby took his hand away and smiled at the man instead, “Nice to meet you, Andrew.”
Andrew turned his head back toward the wall, seemingly unsure how to respond. Robby couldn’t quite figure out if the man was painfully shy or if he just wasn’t particularly interested in a conversation with him. He tapped his fingers against the bar and tried again, “You from around here?”
Andrew glanced at him out of the corner of his eye before staring straight ahead again. He shook his head no. His eyes darted back to Robby like he wanted to say something. Instead, he pursed his lips and turned away again.
Robby rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, feeling like this was a waste of time. He started to turn away when Andrew looked back at him hesitantly, maintained eye contact for a few seconds, and said “What about you?”
Robby relaxed a little, smiling at the other man, and said “Born and raised. Where are you from?”
Andrew tensed just slightly before answering. “California,” he said quietly.
Robby slowly got Andrew to relax a little, making small talk and occasionally sitting in comfortable silence as they worked on their beers.
When Robby had asked Andrew if he would like to hang out sometime, Andrew had looked over at him in surprise, not answering immediately. Robby waited patiently, having already learned that the man did things in his own time.
Andrew ran his hand through his hair a few times before shrugging and saying “Okay. Sure.”
********
Nine months had passed since the night they met. Their friendship had been a long, slow journey. Robby had learned a bit about Andrew (also known as “Pope”) in those nine months.
Andrew was in Pittsburgh to get away from his family. His mother and three brothers (Baz, Craig, and Deran, he learned, as well as a twin sister Julia who he hadn’t seen in years) were in Oceanside, California and Andrew had wanted to put as much distance between them as he could. He didn’t go into a lot of detail about why he needed to get away from them, and Robby respected his hesitancy to talk about it.
Robby learned through interactions with Andrew that he was severely OCD. He would venture to say that Andrew was on the spectrum. He would also guess there was some PTSD there based on the way Andrew flinched often and seemed to disassociate at times as if having flashbacks.
One day while they were hanging out at the park near Robby’s apartment, sitting on the bench, taking a break from the walk they’d been taking, Andrew had suddenly blurted “I’m…. not normal.” Robby had tilted his head and quirked the side of his mouth before saying, “Who is, man?” And Andrew had seemed to relax in Robby’s presence slightly more that day, realizing that Robby liked him for who he was and that it didn’t matter if he was “different.”
Andrew was fascinated by Robby being a doctor and loved to hear tales of the ER when they got together. Robby tried to stick to the more lighthearted, and occasionally even funny, stories from work. He didn’t want to burden the man with some of the deeper, sadder stuff that went on in that place.
Robby learned that Andrew was 25 (Robby himself was 29) and had not been to college. Andrew had seemed embarrassed when he’d told Robby that. Robby had shrugged, “Not everybody has to go to college.” No judgment from him.
As time went on, Robby discovered a growing attraction between the two. They sat just a little closer. Flirted just a little more. Now that Andrew was comfortable with Robby, he often stared intensely at Robby. The intense eye contact could easily make him weak in the knees.
Another three months passed and Andrew hung out at Robby’s almost every evening. They watched TV and talked about mindless stuff, sat too close on the couch, their bodies pressed together from shoulder to foot.
One night, Andrew was particularly relaxed, commenting on something happening in the show, a rare laugh escaping him, when Robby leaned forward and kissed him. It was quick and fleeting. A press of lips against lips before pulling back and staring at the other man, surprised at what he had done.
Andrew stared back, mouth hanging open.
Robby immediately reared back and stammered, “I am…. so sorry.” His cheeks flushed in embarrassment. Maybe he had misread their situation completely.
Then.
“Don’t be sorry,” Andrew said in that quiet, raspy way of his, never taking that intense gaze off of him.
They met in the middle, soft press of lips against lips again, neither in any hurry to take it any further. It was comfortable. It was sweet.
From there, their relationship grew. Time not spent working was time spent together. Andrew slept at his place every night. They cooked and ate meals together. One day, Robby told Andrew he should just move in. Andrew hesitated for only a second before agreeing. “Okay,” he nodded. “Okay.”
*************
One year later
Andrew was having a particularly bad night. The previous evening had been spent obsessively cleaning the apartment, pacing the living room, discontent. Robby had tried to help him settle but after a few attempts, he decided to let Andrew work through it on his own.
It was 2:45 in the morning and Robby needed to be up for work in a few short hours. Andrew was tossing and turning, in the throes of a nightmare, beside him. He cried out and flailed into Robby who touched his shoulder and made a soft shushing noise to try to soothe him. Andrew froze in place, glanced around, and burst into tears.
Robby sat up, concerned. “Hey…. Hey, it’s okay, baby, just a bad dream. I’m right here, shhh, it’s okay.”
Andrew sobbed and sat up, rocking himself slightly. “Why did… why did sh-she have to do that?”
“Who, baby?”
“Smurf,” he sobbed out raggedly.
Smurf was Andrew’s mother and although Robby didn’t know many specifics he did know that she had done a number on Andrew as a child and teenager. Irreparable damage. She had fucked him up in ways that were shocking and sickening to Robby.
Robby sighed, unsure how to help. Andrew didn’t always like to be touched when he got like this.
“I’m right here if you need me, baby,” Robby told Andrew as he continued to rock himself.
Andrew continued to rock himself throughout the rest of the morning, staring ahead at nothing, tears pouring down his cheeks, occasionally humming to himself.
The subject of therapy had been briefly brought up by Robby a while ago and quickly shot down by Andrew. It might be time to bring it up again. These episodes seemed to be happening more frequently, and Robby was tired. This was no way for Andrew to live, either. He was spiraling and it wouldn’t be long before he hit rock bottom.
Robby brought therapy up that evening after work. Andrew immediately put walls up and turned away from him.
“Just… listen to me, man. All I’m saying is try it. Try it. What’s the worst that happens? You hate it and never go back? Then you’re no better or worse off than you are now. But what if you go and it’s life changing? What if you go and you manage to get rid of this chokehold that Smurf has over you? What if your mind can be free, for once in your life?”
Andrew refused to make eye contact, a sure sign he was uncomfortable. Robby approached him slowly, not wanting to startle the younger man. Once he was in Andrew’s line of sight, he slowly and cautiously reached his hands out to put on his shoulders. “It’s your turn to take control of your life. Don’t let her keep holding you back. You have so much life left to live. Make the most of it. You can do it. It might take work and it might be uncomfortable, but imagine how free you’ll feel once you’re on the other side.”
Andrew pressed his lips together, taking in what Robby was saying.
“Would…” Andrew started, stopped, glanced around for a few seconds before forcing himself to make eye contact again, “would you go with me?”
Robby sighed with relief. “Of course. Anything. Always.”