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Everyone was going to think he’d done it to piss Bruce off, but he hadn’t.
He hadn’t, okay? Just, when he was a kid there wasn’t a lot of room for self-expression, and after rising from the dead and training amongst the most fearsome assassins in the world there definitely wasn’t a lot of room for self-expression, and he’d kind of just wanted to see what it would look like.
And he personally thought it would’ve looked pretty good, if it hadn’t currently been weeping pus and blood.
“Fuck,” he swore, twisting his head to get a better look in his dingy, cracked safehouse mirror. “Fuck,” he said again, because there was blood caked all down his earlobe and dried onto his neck. Lobe piercings weren’t supposed to bleed, right?
He touched it gingerly, and it spurted something yellow at him.
“Fuck,” he said one last time.
He weighed up his options. Bruce, Dick, Tim, and Damian were right out. Alfred would tut disappointedly and make pointed remarks about his life choices. Cass wouldn’t judge him, but she also probably wouldn’t know what to do – her ears had never been pierced.
That really only left two people, and one of them would laugh at him, so he bit the bullet and called Steph.
“Hi,” he started with.
“This is a surprise,” Steph replied. There was the rhythmic sound of a knife hitting a chopping board in the background. “What can I do for you, Mr Hood?”
“So,” he started again, and then chickened out a little. “How are you?”
“Nope,” she said cheerfully. “Don’t play with me, Jason. I know you want something, you never call just because.”
Fuck, she was right. He was going to have to just tell her.
“I did something and I need help to fix it,” he said.
The sound of the knife on the chopping board stopped.
“Did you kill someone?” Steph asked, deadly serious.
“No!” He exclaimed, groaning. “I. I, um. Fuck.”
“Out with it,” Steph said.
“I pierced my ear and I think it’s infected,” Jason said, a little lamely.
“What!”
There was a peal of laughter from the other end of the line. Jason stared at his reflection, his face entirely unamused, as Steph laughed hysterically for what seemed like a straight minute. Jason closed his eyes. She had to take a breath eventually, right?
“Okay,” Steph said, still chortling. “Okay, okay. I’m done.”
“You get it all out of your system?” Jason said, somewhat snarkily. “Because it’s a fucking horror show.”
“Oh, don’t be a baby,” Steph said. “Look, let me put this zucchini in the fridge and I’ll be over in fifteen, alright?”
“Sure,” Jason replied, inspecting his ear in the mirror. The lobe was – the lobe was swelling up around the earring. “Can you make it ten? It’s pretty bad.”
“Don’t be a baby!” Steph repeated, laughing. “Catch ya.”
She hung up, leaving Jason and his bloodied ear to himself. He waited for her by the safehouse door, pacing back and forth, resisting the urge to rub at his ear. It wasn’t the most pain he’d ever been in, but it was very tender, and it throbbed any time he moved his head too far.
There was a knock, and Jason had slid back the deadbolt and opened the door before Steph had even lowered her hand. She smirked at him, and held up a plastic bag. It was oddly reminiscent of the last time she’d been here.
“I come bearing gifts,” she said, and then he turned his head so she could see his ear, the blood down his neck.
“Help,” he said.
“Holy shit that is infected,” Steph exclaimed, stepping inside. “Good thing I came prepared.”
They wandered inside, and Steph headed straight for the bathroom, dumping the bag on the bathtub and gesturing for him to sit. He plonked himself down on the edge of the tub, and allowed her to grab him by the jaw and turn his head so she could get a decent look at what she was working with.
“Did you pierce this yourself?”
“No,” he said. What he did with a safety pin in his bathroom mirror was his business.
Steph raised an eyebrow, turning on the hot water and thoroughly soaping up her hands.
“Yes,” he admitted. She snorted and shook her head.
“So that’s problem number one. Unsanitary equipment.”
“I sterilised it!” Jason protested. “I put it through my lighter until it was red hot.”
“Oh, God,” Steph laughed, shaking her head. “Dude, every time I think my life is a disaster, I should just come to you to feel better about myself.”
“Don’t you do that anyway?” Jason retorted. Steph shot him finger guns, hands still dripping. He tossed her the clean towel off the shower caddy to dry her hands with.
“Nope,” she said, letting the towel drop to the floor. “Pass me the paper towel out of the bag.”
“You brought paper towel?” He asked, digging around in the bag. “What do you think I am, a heathen?”
“Kinda,” Steph chuckled, wiping her hands off and tossing the paper towel into the trash. She pulled a packet out of the bag and tore it open, pulling out an antibacterial wipe and starting on his ear. Jason flinched, pulling away.
“Can you fucking not?” He asked.
“Do you want to lose your ear?” Steph asked back. She inspected the jewellery. “Oh, dude, where did you get this? It’s definitely nickel.”
“There was a guy selling them on the corner of Peel and Hamilton,” Jason protested. “What’s wrong with it?”
“You’re allergic to it, dumbass,” Steph said cheerfully. “This is gonna hurt.”
Her fingers closed around the stud and the backing, and with a swift tug she’d pulled it out of his ear. Jason hissed, clenching his teeth together, and considered calling her a few things that would make Alfred kick him in the behind. He refrained, though, because he knew she was just trying to help.
“I came prepared,” Steph said, digging around in the bottom of the bag and producing a slightly flashier stud. “It’s surgical steel.”
“It has a fucking diamond in it,” Jason said. “I’m not wearing that.”
“It’s a cubic zirconia,” Steph shot back, wiping some of the blood off his neck. “Why not?”
“Because,” Jason said, a little lamely. “I don’t want to.”
“Ooh,” Steph grinned. “Is it not manly enough for you?”
Jason fixed her with a flat stare, clenching his jaw. Steph snorted and finished wiping the blood from his neck and ear. His ear throbbed, and Steph looked at it closer, scrunching up her nose in that cute way she did when she was deep in thought.
“I’ll be back in a second,” she said, and vanished back into the living room. She returned a few minutes later with a wad of tissues, which she pressed up against his ear.
Jason stiffened, because he had a feeling he knew where this was going.
“Sorry,” she said, and then she squeezed.
“Fuck!” Jason exclaimed, trying to pull away. Steph grabbed him by the shoulder and pulled him back, holding him in place as she excised the pus and gunk from the piercing. Jason closed his eyes and waited for it to be over.
“This is so gross,” Steph said, wiping the last of it from his earlobe. “Thank you for letting me do this.”
“You’re a ghoul,” Jason told her. “You’re the only person I know who would do this.”
“You need better friends,” Steph told him. She was probably right, because Jason could count his friends on one hand, and it wasn’t like he was going to call Roy about this. Dude had a kid. He was responsible and shit.
Jason squinted at the surgical steel stud in her hand. It was definitely one of her old ones, it was too pretty to be anything else. And it wasn’t like he was opposed to pretty exactly, but he had an image to maintain. He didn’t want his brothers to see it and laugh at him.
Though if any of them found out about this, they’d laugh until the cows came home.
“Do you want to keep the piercing?” Steph asked gently.
“Yes,” Jason said without hesitation.
“Well until we can get you something a bit more your style, it’s gonna have to be this,” Steph said.
Jason considered his options, and groaned.
“Put it in,” he said. Steph gave him a wicked grin.
She lined up the stud with the hole, which was still weeping softly, and pushed it through. Jason flinched, because it almost felt like she was piercing it all over again, but she secured the back on it and stepped back after only a few seconds.
“Was that so bad?” She asked him.
He glowered at her.
“You asked for this,” she said. She dug around in the bag and produced a white bottle, and before he could say anything, she had sprayed his ear with it, the liquid inside a shock of cold on his tender earlobe.
“What the fuck was that!” He demanded.
“Piercing spray,” Steph replied, handing him the bottle. “Put it on your ear twice a day for the next couple of weeks. Rotate the stud, as well.”
Jason stared at her blankly, and she rolled her eyes.
“Did you seriously not look into any kind of piercing aftercare before you did this?”
“No,” he answered honestly.
“I thought you’d be all over that shit. You meticulously plan every other detail of your life.”
“I do not,” Jason protested, but it was half-hearted. He kind of did. It was his thing.
Steph looked down at him with wide blue eyes, the corners of her mouth twitching up into a radiant smile. She turned to scrub her hands in the sink once more, shaking her head, and Jason got up off the tub and came up behind her, looking at his reflection. It didn’t look so bad with the new stud in, but his earlobe was still an angry red. He reached up to touch it, but Steph spun around and grabbed his wrist, stilling his hand.
“Do not,” she warned him, and he became very aware of how in his space she was. He took a step back and cleared his throat, ducking his head.
“Thanks,” he said. They made their way out of the bathroom, and he wandered over to the kitchen, needing to do something with his hands. “You want a drink?”
“If you’ve got any soda,” Steph replied. Jason pulled two grape sodas from his fridge and passed one over, getting a grin from the blonde. She cracked it open and took a sip, looking up at him curiously.
“What?” He said, suddenly self-conscious.
“Can I ask you something?” Steph said.
“You just did,” he replied. She rolled her eyes. “What is it?”
“Did you do this to piss off Bruce?”
“No,” he replied, and she raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t.”
“There are easier ways to piss off Bruce,” she took another sip of her soda.
“I didn’t do it to piss off Bruce,” Jason said, a little too sharply. Steph stopped and fixed him with a look.
“Why’d you do it?”
“Because I could,” he said, shrugging. “Why does everything need a reason?”
“It doesn’t,” Steph replied, “But I feel like this does.”
Jason took a long sip of his grape soda and stared at the wall. He swallowed, making an active effort not to clench his jaw as he did so, because Steph always seemed to be able to read him like a fucking book. She didn’t share Cass’s gift for body language, but when it came to him, she was like a damn psychic. It was uncanny. Also, extremely annoying.
“I just,” he started, then stopped. He huffed. It was stupid. She wouldn’t understand.
“Jay?” Steph prompted, taking a step toward him and setting her drink aside. “C’mon. I’m not going to laugh at you, dude, I swear.”
“I feel like…” He hesitated, then tried again. “I feel like I’ve spent the past ten years trying to live up to expectations I don’t meet. That I’m never going to meet. Bruce wants me to fall in line, be his perfect little soldier. I can’t. Even before that… my dad… thought I should be a certain way. He didn’t like punk music because it was for fags. He didn’t like my friends because they were from a bad crowd. He didn’t like me spending time with my mom because he thought I’d turn out like her.”
Steph didn’t say anything. She just kept watching with a careful, almost guarded expression.
“I’m sick of people trying to limit me,” Jason murmured, holding his can of soda closer to his chest. “I just want to be myself. My own person. Jason Todd.”
Steph took a sip of her drink, tucking a strand of blonde-and-purple hair behind one ear. She considered him for a moment, and he tried not to fidget under the weight of her gaze. Eventually, she said, “I know Jason Todd. He’s a pretty cool guy.”
That startled a laugh out of him. “Don’t fuck with me, Brown.”
She shrugged. “I’m not. I’m agreeing with you. I don’t think you need to limit yourself because of what other people want. You want an earring, get an earring. You want a tattoo, get a tattoo. You want to stop dyeing your hair-”
“I don’t dye my hair!” He gave her a playful shove, and she jumped out of his reach, laughing.
“Okay, sure, Mr Salt-and-Pepper-Daddy.”
Jason scrunched up his face. “Don’t call me that.”
Steph smirked and set her drink down on the counter. “How’s your ear feeling?”
It was still tender, hot, and sore, but it was no longer throbbing, so he counted that as a win.
“Better,” he said honestly. She beamed at him, all sunshine and rainbows, and he offered her an uncertain smile back. His gaze flickered toward the analogue clock above his bedroom door and he said, “I didn’t interrupt you while you were making dinner, did I?”
Steph shrugged. “You did, but it was worth it. You squirmed like a little bitch when I squeezed the pus out.”
Jason gave her a half-hearted punch on the arm. “I did not.”
“Yes, you did,” she laughed. “For real, though, don’t worry about it. I had only done the zucchini, and it keeps in the fridge for ages.”
“Well, let me make it up to you,” Jason said. “I’ll cook tonight. Do you like pasta?”
“Doesn’t everyone?” Steph laughed.
They regarded each other for a moment, and Jason smiled, ducking his head. Steph crossed one ankle behind the other, picking up her drink again and taking a sip.
“Well come on then, boy wonder,” she said. “Dinner won’t cook itself.”