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Eddie was no stranger to being hit on by men (and people of other genders). He was tall, tan, and muscular—not to mention the whole firefighter thing. His kind eyes and warm demeanor made him approachable, and that meant getting hit with pick up lines and flirtatious looks regularly when he was out, whether at work or play. So, he was used to it. The first time it happened after he realized he was gay, though, it felt different. He was newly back in Los Angeles after his hellish stint in El Paso. The jarring death-but-not-really-death of his Captain, coupled with watching his best friend nearly get caught in a building collapse, shook up some things inside. He reevaluated a lot of things in his life and had come to a few conclusions: 1. He and Chris belonged in California, 2. He isn’t as straight as he thought he was, 3. There was a reason why leaving Los Angeles had been so hard in the first place, and 4. That reason was Evan Buckley—not that the rest of the 118 didn’t matter, but Buck was… different. Eddie was a newly realized gay man in love with his best friend, and he felt freer than he had in… well, probably his entire life. So, a warm spark spread through his body when he noticed a bar patron eyeing him in interest while waiting for drinks. He had dark skin and dark eyes, and his build was similar to Eddie’s own. The appreciative look on the man’s face made Eddie blush. He shot back a shy smile. It felt exciting—even though he knew nothing would come from it.
“Not to be too forward, but are you single?” the man asked. ”Couldn’t help but notice someone as handsome as you.”
“Uh, technically, I guess,” Eddie said, ducking his head a little. He shifted his gaze across the bar to where Buck was sitting at a table with Ravi and Chimney. “But I wouldn’t say that I’m available, if you know what I mean?”
“Recent break up?”
“No, but I’m kind of already committed to someone. My best friend, actually. But he doesn’t know yet that I’m…” Eddie trailed off. “It’s a recent discovery.”
“You interested in experimenting? Maybe just for tonight?” the man asked, trailing his fingers lightly across Eddie’s forearm.
Eddie shivered at the touch but shook his head softly. “It’s not that you’re not—I just don’t really do casual.”
“Shame. Well, don’t let me keep you, then. Good luck with your friend. He’s a lucky one.”
“Thanks.”
The bartender presented the four drinks Eddie had ordered, and Eddie gathered them to bring back to the table the others were at. As soon as he reached the table, the topic of conversation shifted to him.
“Was that guy trying to pick you up?” Buck asked, eyes narrowed in a glare as he tracked the man’s progress through the bar with his own drink.
“Uh, yeah, he was,” Eddie said, sliding back into his seat beside Buck after passing out the drinks.
Buck snorted. “Idiot.”
“Eddie’s an attractive guy,” Ravi said. “He’s gonna get attention.”
“Yeah, I know, but he’s clearly straight, so that guy is an idiot.”
“Love how you both just admitted you find Eddie attractive,” Chimney said with a grin, sipping his fruity cocktail.
“Uh, so did you and Hen on his first day at the 118, and Hen isn’t even into guys,” Buck argued. “It’s not some hidden fact that Eddie is hot. That doesn’t mean that people should notice that and try to hook up with him.”
“Maybe you guys should stop talking about Eddie like he’s not sitting right next to you,” Eddie said, a red blush covering his cheeks.
“I just wish that people at bars would leave you alone, okay?” Buck grumbled.
“Yeah, me too.” Eddie laughed softly.
“Pretty people problems,” Ravi said with a shake of his head.
“As if you have any room to talk, Panikkar,” Chimney scoffed.
“I don’t have a problem with people flirting with me at bars, so it doesn’t apply,” Ravi said, flashing Chimney a bright smile.
The four of them fell into casual conversation, and Eddie let himself relax. While Buck spouted off facts about his latest internet deep dive—Gothic architecture—Eddie let his eyes wander through the semi-lit room. He was still listening, of course. He always listened to Buck, whether he was talking about pointed arches and flying buttresses, cuttlefish, the last episode of The White Lotus he watched, or anything else, really. He loved listening to Buck, always had. That said, Eddie could only spend so long looking at his beer bottle or Chimney and Ravi. It was hard for him to look at Buck as much as he wanted to since he was sitting next to him. It would be a little too obvious he was staring if his head was constantly craned to the left, tracking Buck’s movements as he gestured excitedly to demonstrate the elements of typical Gothic buildings. So, he let his eyes wander. There were quite a few men whom he might have taken an interest in if he weren’t so smitten with the person sitting next to him. Dedication to Buck aside, it was nice to let himself appreciate the looks of other men. He had spent decades shoving that part of himself into a box labeled “WARNING: DO NOT OPEN.” Now, he had ripped the label off, torn the box wide open, and accepted the truth about his sexuality. The problem with wandering eyes, though, was that other eyes found his, too. A few moments into his scanning, he made eye contact with a slim redhead with piercing green eyes and sleeve tattoos. Eddie must have done something with his face that indicated he was interested, because before he knew it, the redhead was crossing the room to approach his table.
“Hey, gorgeous,” the redhead greeted, giving Eddie a salacious smile. “Can I get you another drink?”
Buck’s head whipped to the newcomer faster than chain lighting. He had just been detailing the Duomo di Milano, but he cut himself off to answer the question on behalf of Eddie, his voice turning waspish. “He’s not interested.”
“Why don’t you let him answer for himself?” the redhead shot back.
Eddie blushed yet again, though this time it was more from embarrassment than anything else. “Thank you for the offer, but I’m not looking for anything right now. Sorry.”
“He’s also straight,” Buck tacked on.
The redhead raised an eyebrow and looked between Buck and Eddie, clearly not believing what Buck said. Eddie gave the man a panicked look and shook his head faintly. The man nodded in understanding. “My apologies. Have a good night.”
Eddie let out the breath he had been holding and relaxed back into his seat (and also into Buck’s side). He didn’t want to talk about what just happened, so he did the one thing he knew would keep the heat off him. “Keep telling us about the cathedral, Buck. You said it was the biggest one in Italy?”
Buck took the bait easily. “Yeah! It’s also the second largest Catholic church in the whole world. How cool is that? Religion aside, they have some of the most incredible churches.”
The next time it happened was at work, because of course it was. The 118 responded to a multi-floor office fire, and one of the workers took an interest in both Buck and Eddie. The building was cleared of people and the flames seemed to be out after putting up a decent fight. The man came up to chat with Eddie and Buck while they were waiting for the all-clear from Bobby.
“Guess I’ll have some time off after this. I could use someone to keep me company while things get figured out. Either of you interested?” the man asked, his honey brown eyes bouncing between Eddie and Buck. “I’d be happy to entertain you both, honestly, if that were something you’d be interested in.”
“I’m not looking for a hookup or anything right now,” Buck said. “And he’s st—”
“You are gay though, right?” he interrupted. “I didn’t misread that vibe?”
“I’m bi,” Buck said.
“Oh. I don’t go for bi men. What about you, handsome?” He turned his full attention to Eddie. “We could have some fun, just you and me.”
“He’s straight,” Buck said, his jaw twitching.
“Definitely not interested in anyone with a prejudice against bisexuality,” Eddie said at the same time. “It’s 2025, man. Stop discriminating.”
Eddie could have—should have—corrected Buck, but the words got lost somewhere in his throat. It’s not like he wanted to come out to his best friend during a random call in front of a stranger, but the opportunity was right there. The closest thing he could do, however, was call out the man for his bigotry. That way, he wasn’t confirming his sexuality in any way, but he wasn’t denying it either. That was a start. Maybe Buck would eventually pick up on the subtle hints that Eddie was not, in fact, straight. He had to pick up on it eventually, right? Then Eddie wouldn’t have to go through the whole coming out thing. Truthfully, he really did not want to deal with that and all of the discourse that would happen after it. He just wanted to exist as he was and for Buck to somehow notice his interest and return it.
“What is with men hitting on you lately?” Buck grumbled as they walked back to the rig, their shoulders bumping every other step.
“You and Ravi said it best, Buck,” Chim chimed in, having overheard them. “It’s because he’s so attractive.”
Hen, of course, happened to walk up just then. “Who’s so attractive?”
Chimney grinned, a wicked gleam in his eye. “Why, our dear friend Edmundo, of course. Right, Buck?”
“I—We already went over this at the bar,” Buck said. “It’s an objective fact.”
“And why have you been discussing this?” Hen asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Because men keep hitting on him!” Buck exclaimed, throwing his hands up in exasperation. “It’s ridiculous!”
“You seem pretty worked up over something that’s happening to Eddie. How do you feel about it?” she asked, turning her gaze to Eddie.
Eddie shrugged. “It’s fine, as long as it doesn’t get too pushy.”
“Interesting.”
“It’s not fine,” Buck muttered darkly, mostly to himself.
“It really doesn’t bother you that men flirt with you?” Chimney asked.
Another shrug. “No. Why would it?”
“Because you’re straight!” Buck snapped, then pulled himself into the truck without another word.
Ravi followed shortly after, steering clear of the conversation, not wanting to get roped into another conversation about Eddie. He’d had enough of those to last a lifetime. Hen, Chimney, and Eddie exchanged looks, a crackling tension circling them. Eddie’s face was an embarrassing shade of red. He shifted uncomfortably on his feet as the silence grew.
“He seems to be clinging to that pretty tightly,” Hen finally said.
Eddie let out a shuddering breath. “Yeah, he does.”
“Eddie—” Hen started.
“118, let’s roll out!” Bobby called, halting whatever Hen was going to say.
Eddie was thankful for the interruption. He wasn’t ready to have the conversation Hen was surely angling for, just like he wasn’t ready to correct Buck about his sexuality. He shot her a distressed look, signaling not now. Hen nodded, a pensive expression on her face. She and Chimney exchanged looks again, and then the three of them clambered into the waiting vehicle to join Buck and Ravi. Buck was unusually silent on the drive back to the station, a sour look on his face as he looked out the window. Eddie nudged Buck’s knee gently with his own. Buck turned to look at Eddie, his face relaxing upon seeing Eddie’s soft smile directed his way. He was still quiet, but he at least seemed a little more at ease.
It happened again midway through the very next shift. There was a massive pile-up on the freeway, and multiple stations were called to the scene. This time, Buck was partnered with Ravi to work on extractions and clearing vehicles, and Eddie was helping treat the easier-to-handle injuries to free up Hen and Chimney for more complex ones. One of his last patients was the culprit, a tall man with dark, curly hair and bright blue eyes reminiscent of one Evan Buckley.
“Are all the firefighters in L.A. as gorgeous as you, or am I just lucky enough to have someone like you helping me?” the man asked as Eddie tended to a gash on his arm.
Eddie blushed at the compliment from the patient. He smirked slightly as he finished wrapping the man’s injury. He didn’t know what compelled him to respond in kind, but the words slipped out before he could stop them. “Maybe I'm the lucky one here.”
The man gave a short laugh. “Charming, too. I guess at least one good thing came out of this shit show of a day.”
“I’m glad I could help with that. You should be good to go, now, by the way. Just watch for signs of infection: redness, swelling, heat in the area, fever. If any of that happens, get yourself to an ER.”
“You sure I can’t just call you?” he quipped. Eddie laughed lightly, assuring the man that the ER would be much better help than he would be if things took a turn for the worse. “Well, thank you for your help, Firefighter…?”
“Diaz. Eddie Diaz.”
“Thanks, Eddie. I’m Garrett. It’s been a pleasure meeting you. Here’s my number. Maybe we could both get lucky again another time—preferably without any injuries involved.”
“Maybe,” Eddie said with a smile, slipping Garrett’s number into his pocket. “Take care of yourself, Garrett. I’ve got to—“ Eddie gestured around the scene before making his way to the next patient who needed treatment.
Buck saw the whole interaction and felt his insides seething with… something. He couldn’t quite identify the feeling, but white hot fire raged inside his body as he watched a blushing and giggly Eddie accept a number from a patient—a male patient. That he had just flirted with. On a call. They didn’t do that. Dating people from calls always proved to be a disaster. Look at both of their histories: Abby left Buck without a word while she galavanted around Europe, Ali couldn’t hack being with a first responder, Taylor betrayed Buck and the 118, Natalia only cared about Buck’s brush with death, and Tommy never took Buck seriously, and had definitely been interested in Eddie first. Marisol was weirdly obsessed with her brother—not to mention the whole nun thing—and while Eddie hadn’t technically met Ana on a call, they’d reconnected at one, and look how that turned out. Plus, Eddie was straight. Or maybe he wasn’t, since he had flirted back with the patient. Regardless, Eddie didn’t need to be picking anyone up on calls, no matter their gender. It always ended badly. So, Buck glared at the man with stupid curly hair and stupid blue eyes while he finished helping Ravi clear the scene.
“You okay, man?” Ravi asked, picking up on the shift in Buck's mood.
“Spectacular,” Buck supplied in a flat voice.
Ravi followed his gaze to Eddie and the patient. “Oh. Maybe we should go check with Bobby and see if there’s anything else we can do… somewhere else.”
“Great idea, probie.”
Ravi sighed. “I haven’t been a probie for over three years, Buck.”
“It's a term of endearment, Rav,” Buck said, clapping him on the shoulder.
“It feels more like an insult. Do I need to remind you of my actual probie days?” Ravi asked, a displeased look on his face.
“Nope, I remember them fondly. Let’s go find Cap.” He cast a last withering look at Eddie, who happened to look up right at that moment, catching Buck's irate gaze. His shy smile morphed into a confused frown as Buck stalked off after Ravi. “On second thought, tell me one of your favorite moments from then. I need a distraction.”
“My favorite moment was when I said the q-word and you all had a shift from hell, but I didn't,” Ravi answered easily.
“That's a low blow, man…”
Buck spent the rest of the shift avoiding Eddie the best he could. When Eddie was in the gym, Buck was in the kitchen helping Bobby. When Eddie was in the loft playing video games, Buck was in the gym. He may or may not have also spent a good deal of time hiding in the back of the ambulance with a book. Not that he got much reading done, his mind constantly replaying the reel of a shy and captivated Eddie. Every time the memory came up, the white hot feeling returned, too. He was half-tempted to say the q-word so that there wouldn’t be any more downtime, but he didn’t want to risk another shift from hell—even if it would be nice to see Ravi get a taste of it after his comment earlier. Instead, he isolated himself as much as possible, doing his best to skirt around Eddie. Which, of course, was a problem come end of shift. He had no way to escape anymore, considering the fact that they carpooled to work every day and lived in the same house.
“You feeling okay?” Eddie asked as they changed into their civvies. “You were kinda AWOL most of shift. Hen thought maybe you weren’t feeling well.”
“I’m fine,” Buck said, slamming his locker door shut. “I’ll be in the car.”
Eddie gaped after him as Buck strode out of the station and into the night. Buck definitely was not fine. Eddie rushed to finish changing and collecting his things so he could follow Buck to the car. He opened the backseat to throw his duffel bag in, then took his place on the passenger side. Buck barely waited for Eddie’s seatbelt to be securely fastened before he peeled out of the parking lot.
“You don’t seem fine,” Eddie said softly. Buck shrugged. Eddie sighed. “Did something happen on a call?”
“Drop it,” Buck said, his jaw twitching again.
“Is Maddie okay? The baby? Is your leg acting up?”
Buck ignored the questions, opting to turn up the volume of the radio instead. Eddie’s mouth twisted in confusion and hurt as he stared at Buck. This was a new level of bratty Buck that Eddie wasn’t privy to, and he didn’t like it one bit.
When they arrived home, Buck was out of the car and in the house faster than Eddie could extract himself from his own seat, grab his duffel, and make his way up the drive. Eddie entered the house with a weary sigh, toed off his shoes, then brought his bag into his bedroom, emptying the dirty clothes into the laundry hamper. He could hear Buck clattering around in the kitchen, and he left him alone for the moment. He ducked his head into Chris’s room to find him already asleep, surprisingly. He had expected him to still be up on his computer. He retreated and shut Chris’s door, then padded into the living room. Buck was sitting on the couch now, a bottle of beer in his hand, half-empty. When Eddie sat on the other end of the couch, Buck’s posture tensed, and he scooted farther into his corner.
“Okay, what the hell is wrong with you?” Eddie asked.
“Nothing; I'm fine,” Buck said, taking a swig of his beer. His steely blue eyes told a different tale.
“Oh my god,” Eddie muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Yeah, you sure seem fine, Buck.”
“I’ve never been more fine.”
“So fine that you don’t want to talk to me or sit on the same couch?”
“I told you to drop it, Eddie,” Buck snapped.
“Why should I?” Eddie challenged. “I thought we were done keeping things to ourselves.”
Buck snorted. “Yeah, and how’s that working out on your end?”
“What are you even talking about?”
“Nothing.”
“Buck.” Buck said nothing, only sipped his beer and stared straight ahead. Eddie waited a few more moments, then stood up with a disgruntled sigh. “If you decide you’re done being pissed at me, maybe we can actually talk, but since this is going nowhere, I'm going to bed.”
“Enjoy the bed. I'll be sleeping on the couch.”
Eddie had no idea what he’d done for Buck to be so upset, and he wanted more than anything to be able to crawl into bed, side by side with Buck, like he’d been doing since officially moving back home. Sleeping next to Buck soothed him in a way he couldn’t even begin to explain. He hated how much it hurt that Buck was choosing to ice him out like this and sequester himself in the living room. He tried to keep his voice steady when he replied, but it wavered a touch as he spoke.
“I don't know what I did to hurt you, but I'm sorry. Goodnight, Buck.”
“You can’t apologize when you don’t know what’s wrong,” Buck mumbled.
Eddie heaved another sigh. “Well, I obviously did something, and whatever it was, I didn't mean to hurt you. I have no want or reason to do that. Will you please talk to me?”
“I don't have anything to say right now,” Buck said, still refusing to look at Eddie.
Eddie swallowed past the lump in his throat, frustrated to hell that he felt close to tears. He walked away without saying anything else, moving through the motions of getting ready for bed mechanically. He went into the bedroom, gathered a pillow and blanket, then brought them out to the living room. He dropped them on the coffee table wordlessly, then turned back and crawled into bed alone for what he was sure would be an abysmal night’s sleep.
Buck knew he was being childish and petty, but he didn’t know how else to handle Eddie flirting with another man right in front of him. When it first happened, he didn’t want to look too hard at why it bothered him so much. Originally, he attributed it to the flirting happening on a call. He should have brushed it off and moved on, but it stuck with him through the rest of the shift, no matter how hard he tried to shake it. He ran through a thousand scenarios to explain his unruly feelings and then a thousand more, but only one could truly explain it. It was a scenario Buck had refused to entertain for years, despite other people thinking it plausible. It wasn’t plausible. Couldn’t be. Because Eddie was straight. But now that Buck had seen Eddie flirt with a man, his flimsy defense might not have anything to stand on anymore. The bottom line was, Buck was in love with his best friend. Furthermore, his best friend didn’t reciprocate those feelings, obviously. If Eddie was queer somehow and felt comfortable enough to flirt with men, Buck wasn’t one he was interested in. Eddie had never flirted with Buck, not even after finding out Buck was bisexual and therefore available as an option. And if this was just a fluke and Eddie wasn’t queer, Buck would never stand a chance with him anyway. So, Buck was pissed—not really at Eddie, but at the situation in general and the fact he’d become a bisexual stereotype. He was fucked.
“Are you and Buck fighting?” Chris asked the next morning after eating his last spoonful of cereal.
“Why do you think that?” Eddie asked, cursing the fact that his son was old enough to pick up on the tension between him and Buck.
“He slept on the couch, didn’t make breakfast, and left within ten minutes of you getting up. He didn’t even wait to take me to school with you.”
Eddie sighed, something he was getting really sick of doing. “He's mad at me for something but won’t tell me what.”
“It’s giving forgetting an anniversary or being suspected of cheating.”
“We aren't dating, mijo.”
“Are you sure about that?”
“What is that supposed to mean? Of course, I'm sure.”
“You live together, grocery shop together, work together, spend all your time together, both parent me, and you sleep in the same bed. The only thing that’s missing is kissing and sex. Unless you do that, too.”
Eddie choked on his orange juice. “Christopher!”
“What?” he asked with a shrug. “Am I wrong?”
“We don’t—We aren’t—”
“Maybe that’s part of the problem.” Eddie just stared at his son, a bewildered expression on his face. Christopher continued, nonplussed. “What happened right before he started acting all weird?”
Eddie thought back to the previous day, trying to pinpoint when things went downhill. He cycled through downtime, chores, and calls until he finally landed on a moment that might be to blame. He remembered locking eyes with a furious Buck after pocketing a patient’s phone number. After that, he barely saw Buck until the end of their shift, and then the argument started.
“Shit.”
“What did you do?”
“I, uh, may have flirted with a patient on a call. Well, he flirted first, but I reciprocated. I think Buck saw it happen.”
“He?” Chris asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Yeah, what about it?”
“Oh my god, Dad, Buck is jealous.”
“No, he’s not.”
“Yes, he is. You were never an option before, because he thought you were straight. Now, he probably thinks he’s not an option for you. Because if you’re not straight and you’ve never given him that kind of attention but give it to other men…”
“Shit,” Eddie echoed, scrubbing his face with his hand.
“I take it this means you’re not straight?” Chris asked, seemingly unsurprised.
“Oh. Yeah, no, I'm not. I've been meaning to talk to you about it, but haven’t found the right time. It’s… I only figured it out a few weeks ago.”
Christopher shrugged. “You don’t really need to talk to me about it. However you identify is fine.”
“Thanks, bud. I'm gay, for the record.”
“Cool. Does Buck know that?”
Eddie shook his head. “No one else knows. Well, I think Hen and Chimney might have figured it out, and I guess a few random men in Los Angeles know, but they don’t actually know me, so.”
“Are you telling me you’ve been hooking up with randos?” Chris was incredulous.
“No! I’ve been approached by a few men recently and turned them down, but I guess they could tell I’m gay with their gaydar or whatever.”
“You should probably tell Buck about it and that you love him. You do love him, right?”
“Yeah, I do,” Eddie confirmed with a soft smile. “And you know this doesn’t change that I loved your mom, right? I will always love your mom. It just looks a little different than I thought.”
“Yeah, Dad, I know,” Chris said with a smile mirroring his dad’s. “I think she’d be happy for you figuring it out.”
After Buck left the house that morning, he showed up at his sister’s, a distraught expression plaguing his face when she opened the door. She took one look at Buck and swung the door open wide, ushering him into the kitchen.
“It’s too early for wine; I’m making you tea.”
Buck let out a humorless laugh. “Guess I look about as good as I feel. Where’s Chim?”
“Grocery run after dropping off Jee at pre-school.” Buck looked relieved to hear that he had his sister to himself—the baby asleep in the nursery down the hall didn’t count; he couldn’t talk yet. “What’s going on, Buck?”
“Imagine you have a friend—” he started.
“I have several of those.” Maddie nodded as she started heating up water for tea.
“Maddie.” Buck shot her an unamused look.
Maddie grinned. “Sorry, go on.”
“So, imagine you have a friend. You and this friend are super close. You’re out for drinks, and this friend gets hit on by multiple people of the same gender. Which you obviously have no issue with, because you’re bisexual. But your friend isn’t. Your friend is extremely straight. So, you get irritated that they’re getting hit on like that. And then the same thing happens again, but while you’re at work. Twice. But the second time, your friend flirts back, and you get pissed. The other times it irritated you, but this time, you get angry. What, uh… what do you think that would mean?”
Maddie pressed her lips into a straight line and hummed in thought. She poured hot water into a mug with a waiting tea sachet and slid it over to her brother. She poured water into a second one for herself. Buck fidgeted with the sleeve of his jacket while he waited for her to answer his query.
“So, this friend,” Maddie said carefully. “They mean a lot to me, more than probably anyone else does. Our relationship is special. We see each other all the time, both at work and outside of it. We became roommates after some time apart. They have a great kid who I kind of help parent. This friend has also been the recent topic of some interesting conversations with an ex-partner and my sibling. Am I right about that?”
Buck took a sip of tea. “Yeah. I guess you could say that.”
“And now, after the aforementioned conversations, I’m feeling different than I used to after seeing people flirt with my best friend?”
“Not people in general,” Buck corrected.
“Right, sorry. People of the same gender. I get irritated because those people should inherently know my friend doesn’t play for their team. But then it turns out that maybe they do play for that team. And since when did that happen?” Buck hummed in affirmation. “So, then I start spiraling, probably. I get caught in a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions, overanalyzing moments I’ve witnessed and shared with this friend. Probably keep replaying the triggering moment in my head. Maybe project my feelings outward in a not-so-nice way. And then I end up at my sibling’s house the next morning because I realized they were right and I need to talk about it. Does that sound like an accurate reaction to the situation?”
Buck cleared his throat, staring at his cup of tea. “Maybe.”
“Buck, what did you do?”
His cheeks heated up instantly, guilt and shame creeping through his veins. “I was kind of an ass to him.”
“I gathered that. Explain.” Buck launched into an explanation of everything that had happened since that call yesterday, the tightness in his chest never loosening. Maddie listened, nodding along and asking clarifying questions when needed. By the time Buck finished, his eyes were a little watery, and he looked worse than he had when he’d shown up. Maddie let out a long breath when Buck was finished, despite having been relatively quiet for the last several minutes. “Wow.”
“‘Wow’?” I just told you about a life changing, possibly life ruining, revelation, and that’s all you have to say? Again?”
“No, it’s not. I’m sorry. That’s just… a lot. You’re stupid if you think it’s life ruining, though. He’s always been more than just your best friend.”
Buck chewed on his bottom lip for a few moments. “Whatever you’re thinking, please just tell me all of it.”
“I think I’m not the person you should be talking to,” she said with a pointed look.
“Who else am I supposed to talk to?” Maddie's phone rang then with an incoming call. Buck’s eyes widened as she picked it up to answer. “Mads, come on, I'm in a crisis. Can't the call wait?”
“Hey, Eddie!" Maddie answered the call with a bright grin directed at an even more distraught Buck. “What’s up?”
“Maddie,” Buck hissed, reaching out to try to snatch her phone.
Maddie danced out of the way easily, her eyes sparkling with mirth. “Yeah, he’s here. Just finishing up a cup of tea. I'll tell him. Anytime, Eddie. Good luck.”
With that, she hung up, slipping her phone back in her pocket. She picked up her mug of tea and sipped it with a smile on her face while she looked at her brother.
“What does he need luck for? What do you need to tell me?”
“He wants you to come home.”
“How do you know?”
“That's what he asked me to tell you. And as much as I love having you here, I think you should listen. Go home, Buck.”
“Did he say why he wants me home?”
“Does it matter? He's asking for you. He sounded a little desperate.”
“Good,” Buck said, his bratty tone in full force.
Maddie shot him an unamused look. “I'm saying this with all the love in my heart: please get out of my kitchen and go get your man.”
“Maddie,” Buck whined. “You don’t even know if he’s into me like that.”
“Right, because it’s totally platonic to call a friend’s sister to plead for said friend to come home after being iced out for flirting with someone.”
“There's no way he knows that’s why I'm upset.”
“He's not an idiot, Buck. He probably put two and two together. Now, please, go talk to the person you should be talking to.”
“Fine,” Buck grumbled. “If it goes terribly, I'm going to live on your couch again for a while.”
“It'll be fine. It’s just Eddie. Text me later, okay? Love you!”
Buck slumped into the house, letting the door slam shut behind him. Eddie scrambled off the couch to meet Buck in the foyer. They stared at each other in silence, a thick fog of tension settling over them. Eddie tried to relax his posture to combat Buck’s closed-off stance. Normally, the roles were reversed—Eddie was the one putting up a wall, and Buck was the one gently chipping away at the bricks. This time, Buck was the one trying to push away his feelings.
“What is so important that you had to call my sister asking for me to come home?” Buck finally asked, crossing his arms over his chest. “There’s obviously nothing wrong with Christopher, or you wouldn’t be here.”
Eddie took a deep breath. The time had finally come to take that final step over the invisible boundary they’d been skirting for years. “We need to talk about what happened yesterday.”
“What happened yesterday?” Buck asked, feigning ignorance.
“I didn't think anything of it when it happened. It was harmless banter with a patient on a call. I didn't mean anything serious with it, I swear. I didn’t even keep his number. I would never… The fact that you think I would ever want that—”
“That’s sounding pretty homophobic, Eddie," Buck interjected, his eyes flashing something dangerous.
“It'd be weird for me to be homophobic when I'm gay,” Eddie said. A weight was lifted off his shoulder immediately.
“You’re what?” Buck asked, immediately dropping his aloof attitude.
“Gay. Exclusively into men.”
“Okay,” Buck said slowly, taking a moment to process the information. He snapped back into defense mode after he let the new information settle. “So, what, you think I'm mad at you for flirting with someone on a call?”
“For flirting with a man who isn’t you.”
Buck's mouth dropped open in surprise. He hadn’t expected Eddie to clock that. “What?”
“You're mad,” Eddie said, stepping closer to Buck. "Because I flirted with another man.” He took another step closer. “Just like you were mad when I started hanging out with Tommy.” He took a final step that put them only a few inches apart. Eddie reached a hand out to place it on Buck's waist. The other slid up Buck's chest until it came to rest on his neck. “Because it’s my attention you’ve been wanting all along. Isn’t it?" Buck stammered a few nonsense words, his eyes flicking down to Eddie's lips. A sly grin grew on Eddie's face. He leaned forward to let his lips brush against Buck's ear as he spoke in a low voice. “What if I told you that I want your attention, too?”
Buck pulled back just enough to look at Eddie’s face. They stared at each other for a beat, and then Buck surged forward to claim Eddie's lips with his own, pulling a surprised little moan from Eddie. Eddie pressed in closer, marvelling at how good it felt to finally get to do this after denying his attraction for years. The kiss was messy and frantic, quickly becoming heated. Their tongues twisted together and battled for dominance. It wasn’t long before they started to stumble their way toward their bedroom, knocking into walls and picture frames as they went. The push and pull between them was electric, and Eddie got the upper hand in the end. Eddie had Buck pinned underneath him on the bed, and he broke the kiss. Buck whined at the loss of contact.
“I need to make it clear before we go any further that I'm serious about this, about you,” Eddie said.
“Noted,” Buck said breathlessly, trying to chase Eddie's lips.
Eddie evaded, shaking his head softly. “I need to know where you’re at with this.”
“Right now, I’m pretty focused on wanting to keep kissing you.”
“Okay, but this isn’t just about sex for you, right?”
“God, no,” Buck answered, sounding genuinely offended. “You were right. I didn’t realize at first why it was bothering me so much seeing men flirt with you, but I figured it out after yesterday, after seeing you flirt back. The thought of another man getting to have you as theirs was driving me crazy. I wasn’t really mad at you. I was mad at the situation. I thought… I thought you didn’t want me, and I want everything with you. So, I kinda acted out because it was a painful realization. Not-not painful realizing I have feelings for you,” he quickly corrected, a panicked look crossing his face. “That wasn’t painful. But you never—I didn’t think that this—I’m sorry I was a dick.”
Eddie tried to bite back a smile but failed as he took in Buck’s words. He slid his hand up to Buck’s face, letting his thumb caress the endearing pink marks above his eye. “I kinda love you, Evan Buckley. Of course I want you."
“Kinda?” Buck asked with a soft smile.
“More than kinda. Like a lot more.”
“I more than kinda love you, too.”
“Great,” Eddie said before moving in to give Buck a slow, sweet kiss. “Now that that’s out of the way…”