Work Text:
Later, in the rehab hospital, between physical therapy and occupational therapy and talk therapy, Frank will piece it all together in reverse, a time traveler following ripples to the point of impact.
***
It starts with Mel, red-eyed and beautiful, haloed in the lights of the SICU: "Dana told me that when they brought you in, the paramedic—he said you were asking for me." She isn't working, he realizes: no stethoscope, dressed in street clothes, only identified as a physician by her badge, clipped to the neck of her sweatshirt. After a moment's hesitation, she reaches out and pushes his hair off his forehead before tucking her own behind her ear, her braid barely holding together. "He called me, while you were still downstairs and he, um—he told me what you said, before you arrested."
Frank doesn't remember, but Mel doesn't seem to expect him to. "You said to tell me that you were sorry, and that you made a mistake, and I—" Her breath catches and she clasps her hands together so tight that a knuckle cracks. "Was I the mistake?"
Between the opiates and the head injury, everything's a fog, but this much, Frank knows, is not true; she could never be a mistake. His voice hasn't been right since they extubated him, and when his attempt at speech comes out as a cracked hiss, he looks her in the eye and shakes his head as much as his aching body will allow. Mel sniffles, tucking a knuckle under each lens of her glasses to wipe her eyes.
"You know I didn't want to say it first, but he told me—" She takes a long breath, eyes closed, then works her lower lip with her teeth as she exhales. When she kisses his forehead, her lips are warm and soft; he at least remembers that about her from before. "I love you, too."
He mouths the words back to her and she takes his hand; she stays at the bedside until he sinks back into sleep.
***
Robby, voice on the knife's edge of emotion, barely able to get the words out: "Frank, please, do not make me tell you about it. Read my note if you want, but—I can't. I need you to trust me."
***
PTMC medical records department: "Please allow 4-6 weeks for your request to be processed."
***
Abby, exhausted and babbling, still blurry in the brightness of his newfound consciousness: "They said you died again, in surgery." She chokes out a sob, and somewhere, he thinks that no one would have phrased it as him dying. Garcia would know better, at least, but then again, they wouldn't have let her scrub in for this. "The priest came, he did last rites because we—I mean, they call it something else now, I guess, but—" With his less-injured arm, he pats around until she takes his hand; he notes, too, that his wedding ring is missing. Abby keeps talking but Frank stops listening, letting the medications pull him back under.
***
The ambulance report: Medic 2 dispatched with A4 and PFD for a pedestrian struck. On arrival, found 35 y/o male supine at side of road, responsive to verbal. Per PD/witnesses pt was struck by an SUV at approx 30 mph on sidewalk, had no LOC, and was not moved.
CC: “I definitely have some rib fractures.”
Respirations unlabored, speaking in complete sentences. Tachycardic with strong radial pulse. Brief trauma survey shows c-spine nontender/nondeformed, HEENT with shallow abrasions, PERRL, right lateral chest tender and deformed without paradoxical motion, LS CTAB, abdomen NT/ND no guarding or rigidity, pelvis stable, deformity and tenderness to right upper arm with intact distal pulse, right lower leg deformed with intact CSM, and multiple abrasions without significant bleeding.
C-collar was applied and pt. was rolled to scoop stretcher and lifted to stretcher. While patient was being transferred to stretcher, respirations became shallow and rapid. Patient became unresponsive and was found to have absent carotid pulse and PEA on monitor. CPR initiated, #18 IV placed in left AC, IO access established in left tibia, 1L NS started and epi 1 mg IV given.
Breath sounds found to be absent on right. Needle decompression performed with a 14Gx 7cm needle at the right 2nd intercostal space at the midclavicular line, brief rush of air obtained. Following 5 cycles of CPR, carotid pulses present and CPR discontinued. Patient responsive to pain, spontaneous respirations present but shallow. Patient remained ventilated via BVM for duration of transport.
Patient transported to PTMC ED, trauma alert called, care transferred to trauma team.
***
The police report: 22:03, call for pedestrian struck by car at 36 and Liberty. Caller reported a black Tesla swerved onto the sidewalk and struck a single pedestrian before leaving the scene. Pedestrian was knocked onto pavement and remains conscious. A4, P2, FD, and PD dispatched to location. Caller remained on the phone until EMS on scene.
***
The CCTV footage: he should have died. He's seen people survive worse and die from less, but he should have died there, outside the church that they'd turned into a beer hall. Frank watches himself over and over: bumming a cigarette, fussing with his ring, taking a step toward the door and turning away, no doubt debating throwing away a year of sobriety or five years of marriage.
***
And finally, the memory, unearthed as his brain gradually comes back online:
Mel, in her apartment, setting an ultimatum.
Frank, a coward, asking for more time.
Her, mouth a pale line, shaking her head.
Him, a bad boyfriend and a worse husband, whispering, "I can't."
***
The time traveler reverses course, snaps back to the present, or maybe another version of the past. The gift of more time stretches before him, endless and open, and he doesn't waste it.
This time, he makes the right choice.