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The lab is cold in the mornings, bitter and frigid despite the ever-present hum of machinery. Jayce's hand idles around a stray pencil, the eraser chewed down into a nub and the lead long since scratched dull. Viktor hasn't arrived yet, so he's all alone with his own thoughts, and it makes him restless. He's spent so long toying with his ideas in his own head, he probably just got too used to having someone else around who thinks like he does.
A shiver wracks through his frame, and he slouches down into himself, his fingers flicking the pencil into a roll- something monotonous for him to focus on. Even that image, though, gets blurry as his mind starts to float elsewhere- somewhere he can't grasp. The world is a blur, mind blank and yet heavy with his fractured thoughts all the same. Distantly, he can feel himself take in a deep breath and release it as slow as it came in, but it doesn't help his feet reach the ground again.
Somewhere in the background, the large doors creak open and the familiar tapping of Viktor's cane grows closer. Jayce doesn't look up; his mind keeping his body as frozen as the air around himself.
"Jayce?" The low hum of his name familiar in Viktor's voice. Jayce's gaze shifts towards him, but it's not until the press of a hand to his shoulder that he can see again. Even then, the concerned line of Viktor's brows doesn't seem real- too far away and fuzzy even as the picture of him is clear as always. Jayce longs to reach out and touch him, smooth the frown from his lips into the smile he's always loved. But he doesn't move, hands stuck to the table. Viktor's thumb presses ever so slightly deeper into Jayce's clavicle and the pressure flutters his eyelids, gaze drooping and cloudy.
"You're back." Jayce feels himself say, as if through a tunnel.
"Yes… Where are you, Jayce?" The question is nonsensical. He's right here, in the lab with him. As he's always been. But still, he understands.
Jayce has always been more open with his affection, touch his way of checking in, reminding others he's there. A firm hand to offer support, a hug for comfort. But it's not a purely selfless act. Sometimes Jayce can… lose himself in his own mind. Float away, unable to anchor himself back down to the ground. It's… hard to describe when he's there and even harder when he's present. But Viktor can see it in him. Viktor sees him, even when Jayce doesn't feel as though he deserves the attention.
Jayce hums, a not quite response, and turns his gaze back to his hands. His knuckles are ruddy from the chill of the room, fingernails gnawed short. The rune inset into his wristband seems to reverberate into his veins, the faint pressure of its presence grounding and disorienting all at once. Jayce reels in that slow motion, fish out of water kind of way. The back of his mind reaches out for solid ground but can't quite reach the controls that move his body.
Viktor stands behind Jayce and brings his palms down to the tense shoulder muscles stretching up to his neck. Jayce jolts, head leaning back and tumbling into Viktor’s abdomen. His gaze flickers up at him, sees Viktor there, behind him, holding on to him, but still somehow so far away. It's aggravating to be so close to something good and yet unable to fully enjoy it. All good things must come to an end. But Jayce is tired of expecting. He just wants to revel.
"Viktor… Please." He doesn't know what he's asking for. Viktor leans down anyway, reading Jayce's thoughts for him. Their foreheads touch and Viktor’s hands sink lower until he's wrapping Jayce into a hug from behind. Jayce holds on, too, big hands fully encircling Viktor's upper arms. He closes his eyes, feeling Viktor's soft breaths rustle his hair. His skin cold, too, but always colder than Jayce's.
With his eyes closed tight and Viktor’s touch keeping him tethered, it's easier to breathe. To accept that this is real. However, there's that feeling that lingers, still, pleading him not to open his eyes. Maybe if he does, he'll come face to face with an empty lab, Viktor’s touch an unobtainable pipe dream… just a hallucination that helps him sleep at night when he's cold and alone.
Viktor kisses his forehead. Jayce shivers on a muffled sob. Viktor nuzzles his forehead with his own, palms open on his abdomen, sliding up to his sternum and down again. Sliding up. Down. A kiss. A nuzzle. The shift of fabric against his back as he adjusts his stance. Jayce holds on for dear life. To the sensations, to the feel of him, to the heat and chill of him.
"I'm here, Jayce." He whispers, steam of his breath dampening Jayce’s hair where his lips press into Jayce's skull. The words imprint themselves there, soaking in. Jayce won't ever shower again lest he wash them away.
"Please don't go." Jayce whispers, trembling voice surprising but not unexpected. Viktor pulls away but doesn't go far, turning Jayce around in his seat- he's sitting in Viktor’s swivel chair. Jayce didn't even notice. Viktor's hands cup Jayce's face, hips leaning on Jayce's knees. Jayce holds him there as Viktor drags soft kisses along the sensitive skin of his face. It's so real. He's so real.
Jayce's eyes blink open. Clearer, more focused. He's sitting on Viktor's stool in their lab. Viktor is leaning his weight onto him, using the sturdiness of Jayce’s bones in stead of his cane. Jayce's hands are on his hips, ruffling the fabric and revealing the thin, pale skin there. Viktor's hands are on his face still, cupping the scruffiness of his unshaven stubble. His eyes scan Jayce's, searching, letting the flame out of the air balloon. Bringing him back down.
Jayce smiles at him, soft, weary, thankful. Viktor smiles back, relieved, worried, sweet. Their foreheads clink together like celebratory glasses. The kiss they share is a reunion between moving cogs, separating again, inevitably to always come back together. Sure as the sun will set and moon will rise. They will have each other to hold onto. Until the very end.