Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The alarm on Zed’s phone awoke him with its familiar cheery tune. Causing him to knock it off his bedside table trying to turn it off. Why did he set it for 5:15 again? Oh, right, his work’s anniversary party! He had to come in early to bring the cake he baked!

Zed bounced out of bed and scooped up his phone, turning off the alarm before checking his Email. He had an email from his boss asking if he was going to need help carrying in a cake big enough for the whole lab. He decided to ignore that one and just continue his routine. Deleting spam emails before taking a shower and getting dressed.

Zed is the first person to admit he has no real grasp of what sort of clothes you wear for which events, but he’s pretty sure you just wear work clothes to a work party. So he put on his normal outfit, a loose brown shirt with jeans and his beloved lab coat. It was a personal one, so he didn’t have to pay for one of the lab’s. It was a bit stained, mildly singed, and he was never quite able to remove the smell of chemicals from it, but it was his. He made himself waffles for breakfast and turned on the news.

“Last night number one hero HotGuy-”

Zed turned off the news, he already knew it would just be another story about HotGuy beating up a criminal. Or maybe a clash with a supervillain. Not particularly interesting in his opinion, but that might just be because he was a villain. He was bound to not like heroes. Except Wormman, Wormman was cool.

He hummed an old tune to himself as he picked up the cake he made. He was quite proud of his work, it wasn’t even burnt!! He had decided to just go with a basic chocolate cake he got off the internet. It had strawberry frosting that he had spent hours on, and he kinda regretted it, but hey, it seemed simple originally!

Zed put the cake in his car and began the slow gray drive to the lab. He couldn’t tell you exactly why he had accepted a job that was an hour long drive from his apartment in good traffic, but he had. So he sat in the car, listening to the patter of raindrops on the windshield and wishing he was there already. He let his mind wander. Thinking about his experiments, his boss, his new neighbor, how long he spent making that frosting…

He really should have picked a recipe with less complex frosting. Well, maybe he should have picked one with no frosting at all actually. Even he wasn’t sure how he messed up five ingredients so badly it had taken him sixteen tries for it to not turn into ash in the oven, only for the result of his seventeenth attempt to have turned glowing green… eh, nobody would mind. Half of his workplace was irradiated anyway.

He pulled into the parking lot and got out of his car, the cake securely in his arms. His hooves splashed in the puddles that led up to the front door as he approached the entrance to the lab.

 

Tango woke up to the sound of his next door neighbor’s alarm blaring a tune far too happy. Interrupting his dream of flying through the sky. Why would anyone set an alarm for 5:15 AM anyway? He turned over in bed and pulled his pillow over his ears. He had been up till 3:00 dealing with a bank heist last night alongside HotGuy, he didn’t need this.

He eventually fell back asleep. Only to wake up two hours later. Great. Not nearly enough sleep, but he wasn’t gonna go to sleep again today…

Yawning, Tango slowly oozed out of bed. He navigated his way past the boxes scattered throughout his new home. Before finally stumbling into the bathroom. He turned on the shower to its highest temperature and braced himself as he stepped in. The intense cold of the water on his skin and flames was agony, but the overworld rarely had any flowing lava.

Tango washed as quickly as possible before getting out of the shower and curling up under his towel like a turtle. Why did the overworld have to be so darn cold?

He slowly made his way on all fours to his bedroom, somehow managing to put on his clothes without leaving the towel’s protection. He still stayed under the towel for a bit though until the clothes warmed up.

After he finally got warm again, he started looking through his cabinets for something to eat. He was only able to find some hoglin jerky from a month ago and a couple of sad brown mushrooms that he didn’t remember buying.

 

One pack of unhappily eaten hoglin jerky and a quick run later, Tango stood in the grocery store. looking at the single shelf of nether foods, which was, for some reason, in the middle of the herbivore hybrid aisle. Tango chose to ignore the uncomfortable stare of the rabbit hybrid to his left. If he was in this situation he’d do the same.

The selection was small to say the least. Some Hoglin jerky, three cans of Ground Hoglin, and Nether Wart in about 15 different styles of preparation. Not a single thing from the deep nether.

Tango sighed and ran a hand through his flames. He was really hoping this store would have something from his home. But it was worth it to not need to travel through a portal for his job. He grabbed a can of Ground hoglin and some chopped Nether Wart, he'd scramble something together.

He checked out and started the walk home. He should probably get a car or a bike or something. Walking was slow, and he had been an idiot to go running. Sure it was probably his lowest speed, but he still shouldn’t really be risking it.

He had a lot to do.

Chapter Text

Zed looked up at the clock, 7:20 PM, he had officially fulfilled his quota for hours, now for his real Job, his passion project if you will.

Zed carefully opened the door to his chemicals closet in his lab room. Pushing a small hidden button and grinning as the elevator made its way down.

He skipped out into his secret lab. Humming a tune his mom would sing to him when he was little. The sprawling basement complex was his favorite place on earth. Pink and yellow walls Zed had painted himself, a white tiled floor covered in brightly patterned rugs. It was more of a home to him than his apartment. He had been overjoyed to discover the abandoned and unused basement, and didn’t really mind that Dr. Monster kept trying to kick him out of what was apparently the other villain's old lair.

Zed walked over to a hospital bed and looked over the chart beside it. Today he was supposed to… ah! Yes! Today was this experiment’s release date!

He turned to the experiment in the bed. Curled up under the covers was Number 45, a boy he had been adding limbs to.

“Morning’s here! You’re getting released!”

45 stirred a little and slowly sat up. Four of his arms stretching up, the other three holding him steady. All four of his legs were curled beneath him. Zed grinned at his creation and happily grabbed his gas mask. Slipping it on before the child could turn around and see his face. He had been forgetting to put his mask on recently, but thankfully none of the experiments had seen his face yet. Or, well, none that were alive anymore.

“Really?”

“Yup! Ya sure are! You can turn around by the way, mask’s on!”

45 nervously turned to look at Zed, all of the boy’s muscles were clenched tightly, and he looked scared out of his mind. Zed didn’t care all that much, he took one of the boy’s hands in his own and slowly stood up, waiting for the boy to steady himself.

“You’re getting better at walking.”

“Thank you.”

Zed led (Ha, that rhymes) 45 through the underground lab and out through a tunnel leading to a national park. No security cameras could see the two. Even if they did, Zed was wearing his gas mask, and had his hooves, horns, and tail fully hidden.

“So, why now?”

“Hm?”

“Why are you letting me go now?”

“Because my experiment is over!”

“But what ended it?”

“I did everything I wanted to do! Besides, just adding limbs was getting boring and I can’t use you for any other experiments, you’re not average enough anymore!”

“Why do you do this…”

“Why not?”

“Because I didn’t consent? Because I’m a person too?”

“So? I didn’t torture you. I gave you anesthetic for all the operations, I made sure you ate and drank enough.”

“I didn’t get to see my family, my friends. I didn’t know if I'd survive.”

“That doesn’t affect me.”

“Does my life mean nothing..?”

“No. Your life does matter, just not to me. I’m sure your family misses you. I bet they’ll be happy to have you back.”

“...”

“45? You’re not walking.”

“Sorry.”

The two walked through the park for a bit longer, before Zed stopped at a trail with a map.

“This is it 45! You’re out now!”

“I- Thank you.”

“You’re welcome! Don’t tell anyone how I got ya here, the passage won’t be there when they check.”

45 started speed walking away as fast as they could in the direction the map said the parking lot was. Zed smiled and walked back the way he came.

Left, right, right, left, over the creek, left

Eventually Zed reached the tunnel and walked back through. He trailed his fingers along behind him and the tunnel began to collapse.

I wish you’d let me fully out

You’d hurt the experiments.

Zedeath manifested in front of Zed, floating grumpily in the air and drifting along.

I swear, I should’ve let your brother’s soul wander instead of attempting to reap it.

No comment.

Zed stepped out of the tunnel. He dusted off his hands and left the small room with dirt walls, back into the main lab. He went to 45’s old cot and began to change the sheets. His comm pinged with an alert, the news was talking about Dr.Sheep again.

“This should be interesting.”

Zed opened the video and set it to play in the background.

“Just two minutes ago a twelve year old boy who has been missing for 6 months showed up in a national park parking lot. He was clearly mutated and had a small sheep tattoo on one of his right shoulders, the mark of Dr.Sheep. We once again ask that you keep track of your children, as Dr.Sheep, while preferring adult victims, has no issue taking a child. The boy identified himself as Jason Somler, although authorities have yet to receive positive identification. This is a reminder to you all, while supervillains like Dr.Monster or the bad boys may seem like the most dangerous, lower profile villains like Dr.Sheep are just as bad, stay safe out there. Now onto the HotGuy vs. Mother Spore fight from earlier..”

Zed scoffed

“They didn’t even attempt to acknowledge my experiment! Just said he, “Looked mutated”. As if my work is meaningless!”

Y’know, maybe if you weren’t evil they’d care more about the science.

“I’m not evil!”

Riiiiiiiiiiight….

“You really can’t be talking.”

Good point.

Zed huffed and finished changing the bedsheets. It was time to begin planning his next experiment. He’d always wondered if you could rewire someone’s brain without killing them.

 

🩷🐑🧪⚗️🧪🐑💛

 

Tango was called in by the police barely two seconds after the child was found. He responded immediately, already getting into his costume.

“Yeah?”

“We found another one of Dr.Sheep’s experiments, at the park, Approximately 12, male.”

Tango felt his blood flare hotter. A child. And a victim of Dr.Sheep no less. No being on the earth deserved to be one of the scientist’s subjects.

“I’ll be right there.”

After snapping on his goggles and adding some copper to his hair, he sprinted out of his apartment, full speed. It barely took him a minute to get to the scene.

A young boy stood in the parking lot, illuminated by police lights and a street lamp. He wore a simple hospital gown, like most of Dr.Sheep’s victims. Most notable was that the boy had two more pairs of arms under his normal ones, and also had an additional set of legs. A longer arm with three joints was wrapped around the child’s torso and seemed to emerge from the back like a tail.

Tango tried his best to slowly approach the kid, hoping to not scare him.

“Hey.. can you tell me who brought you here?”

“Doctor Sheep.”

“Can you tell me how?”

“I- It won’t be there when you look.. That’s what he said.”

“Can you please just tell me? We might find a clue to his identity.”

“... a tunnel, in the woods. If you go down the… blue? Trail? I think? Once you reach the… third, sign, if you walk off the trail and far into the woods and take a bunch of turns there was a tunnel he used. It led to his lab.”

“And you don’t know the turns?”

“No, I can’t imagine how he did, but, then again, he’s really really smart.”

“Okay Kiddo.”

Tango turned to the police

“I’m going to look for Dr.Sheep, You get this kid through any legal stuff, and get him to his family.”

Without another word, Tango snagged a map and took off running into the forest. Quickly reaching the sign. He looked around and spotted a broken branch. Upon further inspection, it was a trail of broken branches.

He followed the trail until it ended, reaching a sign with the message, “So, you got tracking skills then? Or you’re a random lost hiker, whatever. Don’t worry, I made sure my trail vanishes after this point ;)” It made Tango angry, the mocking tone, the way it had been carved in only straight lines so there was no handwriting to trace. Dr.Sheep must have left it, and he had been clever.

This Man. This godawful excuse of a person. Had kidnapped a child, tortured said child, returned said child, and then had the gall to mock the ones looking for him.

Tango ripped the sign out of the soil and stalked back to the parking lot. Handing the sign over to the police as evidence before running home. It was all he could do to not burn everything in his wake to the ground.

Once Tango reached his building he climbed up the fire escape and slipped into his apartment. Taking off his costume and flopping into bed to scream into his pillow.

His screaming was promptly interrupted by a knock on the door.

Chapter Text

Tango threw on a sweatshirt and some pants before he opened the door to his apartment, saw nobody, looked left, saw nobody, looked right, saw nobody, then looked down.

A man, about a foot shorter than tango, stood in front of his door, he had a mass of fluffy blonde hair with the tips of horns just barely poking out, big brown eyes, and a deeply concerned expression on his face. He was kinda cute honestly.

“Are you okay? I heard screaming.”

“Yeah.. mostly I guess.”

“Would you like some tea?”

“Honestly? Tea wouldn’t be terrible.”

“Great. C’mon.”

The man grabbed Tango’s wrist and dragged him out of his apartment, barely giving Tango a second to shut his door. The pair went down the hallway a short distance before entering the apartment right next to Tango’s. Oh, this was the guy with the annoyingly early, annoyingly loud, alarm.

The apartment was as sparsely furnished as Tango’s, but was decidedly not unlived in, stacks of books and papers were crammed in every available corner while still keeping spaces clear for walking. The few pieces of furniture in the apartment were all brightly colored, with dizzying patterns and unidentifiable stains. The walls of the apartment were all covered in taped up sheets of patterned paper, and the overall effect the area had was of a splatter painting or surrealist collage.

It gave Tango a headache, and he was quickly ushered into a chair before the man skipped over with a tray of delicate and mismatched china teacups as well as a large cast-iron teapot.

“So! What was the screaming about? Are you okay?”

“Yeah, just… frustrated.”

“Why?”

“The kid.. Dr.Sheep got away again..”

“Hm.”

“That's it? Just ‘Hm.’? Not even gonna acknowledge anything?”

“Sorry, I didn’t want to bring it up if it made you upset.”

The man pours Tango a cup of tea and hands it to him, the liquid inside beginning to simmer from contact with his skin.

“It’s… fine.”

“So what’s your name?”

“Tango, you?”

“I’m Zedaph!”

The man- Zedaph, smiled and offered Tango a hand. He had a tooth gap, and light freckles, cute.

Tango shook away the thought and shook Zedaph’s hand. Zed shook it rather violently, nearly pulling Tango off his chair, but Tango miraculously managed to stay seated and keep the tea from spilling.

“Why’d you move here then?”

“Hm..?”

Tango was still recovering from the handshake, which had restored his headache by way of making the room shift fast.

“Why did you move here? It's not exactly the best apartment after all…”

“It’s what I can afford, I just… more opportunities in the overworld y’know?”

Tango felt only a little pinprick of guilt for lying, but he couldn’t exactly say, “Well I’m a hero and it's easier to just live here instead of having to portal every shift” to a random civilian he just met. Especially not if he wanted to avoid questions, which he did.

“Interesting, I have a friend who runs a small motor shop if you need a job!”

“Really?”

“Yup! No credentials needed, he’ll teach ya’ anything you don’t already know.”

“Sounds too good to be true, sorry.”

“Eh, tell me if you need to contact him.”

“Maybe. Thanks for the suggestion.”

“So where are you working?”

“Right now I'm doing freelance coding gigs…”

That wasn’t a lie, Tango was a freelance coder, that just wasn’t his main career. Again though, secrecy exists for a reason.

“Well, I’m glad that’s working out!”

“What about you?”

“Oh! I’m a scientist for the Octagon corporation!”

“Like… that's the big tech one, right?”

“Yup! I work in the inventions department! Basically, I come up with stuff! Just the other day I made a prototype for a jump-powered oven, but it wasn’t approved for further testing.”

“... A jump powered oven?”

“Yup!”

Okay, so his cute neighbor was probably insane. Well, Tango could deal with this… probably…

“Anything for heating water to the boiling point and still making it go through the showerhead?”

“No, do you need something for that?”

“Yeah, water is… not fun to shower in, even at the highest temperature it gets in this building. Taking a bath is out of the question too, not good to be submerged in anything but lava for most netherbornes…”

“Ohhhhh, cause of the fire instead of hair?”

“Basically, yeah.”

“Hmmm… I’ll start working on something then!”

“Thanks.”

“You’re welcome! Feeling better?”

“Yeah. It’s late, I should go to bed…”

“Okay then! Bye Tango!”

Zedaph smiled as he watched Tango leave. His new neighbor was funny, Zedaph liked him.

So, opinions Zedeath?

He’s not due to die, if that’s what you mean.

No, like, do you like him?

Eh, do you?

I do, he seems neat.

He seems like your type.

I’ve never dated in my life.

So? You’d be a cute couple. If you didn’t experiment on him.

I’d never! I don’t bring my pet projects into my personal life.

Yeah, unless it’s about William.

William is strictly personal.

And you just happen to store him in your lab?

STRICTLY PERSONAL

Zed huffed, his brother was a bit of a nebulous zone, that Zed would admit, but where was he supposed to store him? If someone checked his apartment, and found his comatose brother just laying around with no medical equipment, that would be kinda bad.

 

He stood up and went to wash Tango’s tea cup, there were little indents where his hands had touched the cup and it had melted slightly. Tango was silly, accidentally melting the cup. There was something a bit… endearing about the man’s frustration with water.

Yeah, Zedaph definitely liked his new neighbor. He should tell William about him actually. He didn’t tell William about new people much, or at all really, but he wanted to tell someone about Tango.