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Kalim probably should've expected this.
Silver and Jamil walking with him everyday, every where, even as people whisper around them.
Kalim hadn't announced the break-up, but he knows that it was announced.
Silver had asked him if it was okay to share the video that he'd apparently caught of the confrontation between himself and Malleus and Cater after whispers had Kalim ducking back into Scarabia despite still having three classes to go to. So, something was announced somehow, and it left him in a bad light until Silver and Jamil were done doing whatever they did with the video.
Kalim never saw the video online, didn't see the video in general, and doesn't want to see it either. He hasn't heard anything either, but he knows that doesn't mean that things aren't being said.
"Kali, you okay?" asks Jamil softly as he falls into step with him on the way to the lunch room.
"I'm fine, but what are you doing here? I thought you and Silver were going to have a lunch date in the courtyard again?" asks Kalim softly as his brows crinkle in confusion.
"Actually, the three of us are going to have lunch in the courtyard," replies Jamil before he wraps an arm around his waist before guiding him towards the courtyard doors rather than the lunch room. "Silver has the food already since he's getting everything set up while we make our way there."
"But Jamil, you two argued with Malleus for three days to get this opening," huffs Kalim as he glowers at him, confusion and annoyance swirling a bit too comfortably in his veins.
Jamil and Silver haven't let him out of their sight since they got back, even with their duties. Though, Jamil easily keeps him in sight at all times because that is his duty. Silver, on the other hand, has worked out a deal with Lilia and Sebek who are both pissed at Malleus and Carter for how things went down as well. He shows up for his training sessions, but otherwise, he spends almost no time protecting Malleus unless a threat has been mentioned.
He's even been staying in the Scarabian dorm to avoid dealing with Malleus in the first place, despite Kalim's complaints that he's doing far too much.
Jamil glares.
Silver ignores.
And Kalim is forced to deal with Cater and Malleus begging him to fix the problems that came from their own crap.
"Kali, if you don't come with me, Sil is going to sob," sighs Jamil as he leans in, voice soft.
"He would be fine, and you both know that. I'm tired of being in the middle of your relationship. I'm an obstacle, Jamil," says Kalim quietly, hoping he'll understand what he means here.
He can't be an obstacle in a relationship that he's slowly started craving being apart of.
It's easy, you know?
To feel like you're part of a relationship that you have no real place in.
When you're being put in the middle, all your time spent between them.
Laughing together.
Crying together.
Even falling asleep in the same bed together.
Kalim can't believe that it's been taken this far.
He thought they'd stop a month ago, after the whispers had started to go silent, but they didn't. Instead, they seemed to get closer, to push to be together more.
People have asked questions.
Especially about whether Kalim is now Jamil and Silver's third.
Kalim keeps denying it, Silver and Jamil have stopped though.
Which is why he's at such a loss now.
"Kali, please," huffs Jamil in annoyance as he glares at them.
"Jamil, what am I supposed to do when I'm asked if this was a date? What should I say?" asks Kalim in exasperation as he turns to his best friend, his guard. He's at the end of his rope with this situation. Either he gets answers, or he loses Jamil. But no matter what, a line is drawn today. "Because as far as I'm concerned, it isn't. That's ridiculous to me. But when you or Silver are asked, you're basically confirming it. So, tell me, Jamil Viper, what the hell is going on?"
"Kali," Jamil's voice is soft, hesitant, and it hurts Kalim's heart a bit to hear it. "I want to explain, I do, but I can't have this conversation without Silver."
"Yeah? Well, then let's have that conversation, Jamil," replies Kalim with a sneer.
His emotions are too haywire right now, and he's not going to wait any longer for this mess to get handled.
It hurts, but he's not going into this expecting rainbows.
Reality is cruel, and he's been on the end of it far too often now to have a different expectation.
"Kali, I promise, this will make sense, okay? We're not trying to hurt you, okay?" Jamil's voice is soft, attempting to be reassuring in the way he knows best, but Kalim's too unsteady for this.
"Whatever," mutters Kalim softly as he he shakes his head and pulls completely away, putting space between them as Silver comes into sight. "Just keep your space until everything that needs to be said is put out there. If I get asked one more relationship question, I'm going home, alone."
"You can't," huffs Jamil as the sun shines down on them.
"I can, and I will. So, let's get this over with," replies Kalim as they walk over to the picnic blanket Silver is laying across, clearly having fallen asleep again.
"Sil," says Jamil softly as he kneels by his boyfriend's head, fingers gently combing the white strands sweetly until purple eyes open to lock on him. "Kali's here, and he's like to talk. A serious talk."
"The one we were going to have today?" asks Silver as he tips his head back, humming as Jamil's nails scratch at his skull.
"Yes," replies Jamil quietly as Kalim settles across from them, leaving the food as a barrier. "Are you ready for it?"
"I've been ready," says Silver with a chuckle as he sits up carefully, leaving Jamil to settle into place next to him as their legs crisscross. "Kalim, how are you doing?"
"Pardon my words, but let's skip the small talk and just have that conversation," replies Kalim coldly as he crosses his arms over his chest and looks between them.
"Okay," Silver's taken aback by his quick, cold, response, and Kalim really can't blame him. "Well, the conversation is more of a confession and response type of situation. But Jamil and I have spent a lot of time talking, especially after your break-up, about how we felt about you. We talked before, moments of jealousy sparking concern and insecurity in the both of us, but it was pushed aside because you were taken."
"What Silver's attempting to get to is that we, both of us, are romantically interested in you, Kalim," Jamil's voice is soft as he speaks, a hesitance there that breaks Kalim's heart because he thought they were past that. But the topic explains it better than anything ever could. "We both like you, more than like you, and we want you to be our partner, our third, our boyfriend."
"Will you, Kalim Al-Asim, be our romantic partner?" asks Silver as he reaches out his hand, Jamil mirroring him even as their own intertwined hands lay stiffly between them.
Uncertainty weighs heavily in the air.
Kalim worries that it might actually mainly be his own.
But their eyes are shifty.
"You want me to be your partner? Your romantic partner? You two? Want me? To be your third?" Kalim's in disbelief, there's no other way to explain why he's repeating himself, heavily leaning into his words that form short, broken questions.
"Why are you questioning this so hard?" asks Jamil in surprise as he tilts his head to the side. "I was expecting you to react more in surprise than disbelief."
"I was too. Kalim, are you okay?" Silver's surprise has his hand dropping just a bit, enough to be noticeable when it isn't raised back.
"I— You two are one of the most possessive couples I know," explains Kalim with a stutter as he jerks his head back, trying to fight through the wave of disbelief that seems never-ending. He knows they're serious, but this is confusing. "I think you actually might have Leona and Idia beat, and yet you want to involve someone else. me, in your relationship? I— You two said that polyamory wasn't something you were interested in, and now— I feel like my disbelief is warranted here, guys."
"Kali," Jamil chuckles, understanding shining through his eyes. "I can see why that might be hard to believe, but like Sil said, we have discussed this. When we talked to you about that, we were pretty firm in our stance, for sure. But, at that point, we hadn't discussed it. But we have talked about it, Kalim, and we know that if it's not you, polyamory is out of the question."
Silence.
Kalim needs a second to let it sink in, and those outstretched hands fall to the plaid picnic blanket.
He lets the information swell through him, wades through the uncertainty and disbelief with an experienced focus, and lets it all wash over him.
Kalim has to give them an answer.
He knows that.
And he wants to give them that answer.
The problem is that he's at a loss.
He knows the answer he wants to give.
But Kalim's scared.
There's no other way to explain it, really.
After what happened with Malleus and Cater, Kalim fears going into a relationship and being unwanted again.
"Kalim, I can see the way your mind is spinning," Silver's voice is hesitant, like he doesn't really want to interrupt what's happening. But there's a firmness that draws Kalim out of his thoughts. "I want to put some of that worry to rest. You don't have to answer us yet, you don't. However, I would like to at least make you aware of the plans we've come up with together. One of the things we thought about it how to combat the worry of feeling unwanted because our worry is leaving each other unwanted, especially since we knew you'd be concerned about that too. Dates, one-on-one and all together. There would need to be a schedule to allow this to happen often too. That's just one of many ideas we had to make this work."
Reassurance.
That's something that Kalim knows Silver and Jamil do well with.
Not just with each other either.
Kalim's been on the other end of their reassurance. He's felt his whole world brighten with their care along with fluttering wings and a heat in his cheeks.
This is one of those times that a flustering feeling settles gently within him, making him ache to kiss their cheeks in thanks.
Instead, he clears his throat, and murmurs, "Thank you."
"Take your time, Kali. We don't want to rush you," says Jamil as he reaches out his hand to pat Kalim's knee gently. "But we are sincere, and we are hoping to show you that this will be different."
"I believe you, both of you, very much. I am scared, that is my only problem right now," explains Kalim gently, deciding that taking any more time would hurt himself more than either of them. "I know what I feel for the two of you, but the fear is strong that this will turn out the same as it had with… them. In my heart, there's no doubt that this could be amazing. In my head, it's a bundle of fear wrapped in a memory ribbon."
"Think on it, Kali," replies Jamil with a wave of his hand. "We have food to eat, and whenever you're ready, you can tell us the decision you've come to."
"Slow," says Kalim as he looks at Jamil before looking at Silver. But then his eyes drop to his lap. "I care greatly for both of you, I like you both as more than the amazing friends you are to me. But I would like my involvement to be slow. We've speed-run a lot already, technically, but I still want things to move slow. That doesn't mean either of you need to slow down, you've been together far too long for that. Okay?"
"We can do slow, Kalim," Silver's eyes sparkle as Kalim looks up again, their eyes meeting. "But, I would like to know two things, okay? Boundaries are a thing we'll need to discuss, but I know that's going to be fine because we talk about them often already. With that though, what are your thoughts on hand-holding and kisses?"
"Cheek kisses at least for a little while," replies Kalim with a grin, glad that Silver asked about it. "As for hand-holding, I am beyond down for that at any time. I am touchy, so that will probably need to be discussed, but for now, I won't do anything outside of the dorms aside from hand-holding, if someone else wants to."
"That sounds wonderful," Jamil's voice is almost wistful, and Kalim glances at him in surprise. "What? I've imagined holding your hand far too often to not be excited about that."
"That's very sweet," murmurs Kalim as he ducks his head as his face burns.
"It's very true," says Silver with a chuckle as some shuffling noises draw Kalim's attention.
He and Jamil have started making plates for all three of them, and Kalim huffs in amusement as his brows furrow.
"Don't huff at me. I'm making your plate because I started making all three of them," grumbles Jamil as he passes the plate over to Kalim, a slight pout curving his lips as he tilts his head to the side. "You're too far away, unless you feel more comfortable all the way over there."
"You don't," says Silver knowingly, as he reaches out his hand. "We all know you like being between us, Kalim. You were just too grumpy to give yourself that until we had our conversation. Will you sit between us again?"
Kalim just shakes his head, amusement settling comfortably in his stomach as he passes over his plate before standing. He makes his way around the blanket to settle between them before taking his plate again.
"You were right, but you didn't have to call me out about it," replies Kalim as he holds his plate comfortably in his lap.
"He definitely did because now your cheeks are pink, Kali," Jamil's voice is smug, and Kalim elbows him with a huff. "It's cute, Kali, what did you expect?"
"It is very adorable," agrees Silver with a chuckle that fills Kalim with warmth.
"Both of you are nuts," sighs Kalim in defeat, snorting when he's nudges as an offended huff escapes Jamil. "I like you that way though."
"You'd better," comes from both of them in differing tones of faux offense, and Kalim chuckles so hard that he has to block his mouth for a moment to catch a breath.
This is how he fell for them from the beginning.
Their care, their adoration, even when it was under a friendly-lens, always brought heat to his cheeks. Now they're complimenting the flush almost like they provoked it purposefully. As they eat, and tease each other like usual, Kalim wonders if that's something they did before too because of how often they had his face heated.