Actions

Work Header

Meeting the Hickory Family

Summary:

How did Bruce end up here? He was Bruce Wayne: billionaire and (supposedly) airheaded philanthropist. More than that, he was Batman: protector of Gotham and often also the entire fucking world. Occasionally, even the universe.

Now, apparently, he was also Sheriff Hickory: the proud owner of a family farm and the head of the local police in Smallville, Kansas.

In all honesty, he knew how he ended up here, though. It was the one thing Bruce Wayne, Batman, and Sheriff Hickory had in common aside from them all being a version of him: they were all fathers to a bunch of chaos gremlins.

Notes:

So, I posted the first part of this series... almost three and half years ago. Oops. I promised some people back then that I'd write a follow up, so better late than never? Who knows if anyone's still interested, but I kept my word! In my defense, those 3.5 years have been very busy. I finished up my undergrad studies, travelled for a bit, spent several months working 2 jobs, then started law school, which I am now in my last year of. Getting anything not law school-related done during law school is a challenge.

Anyway, if you haven't read the first installment of the series, I would do that first. I'm not totally happy with this story and it's not as funny as the first, but I felt like I needed to post something, so here it is.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: The Hickorys

Chapter Text

This is just a list of everyone in the Hickory family, because I wanted it to be a big family. I'm also giving brief descriptions for some of the ones not mentioned in the first story. Other names are rhymes, some I kind of just picked randomly.

Alfred - Winifred Hickory

Bruce - Sheriff Honeybee Hickory
Selina - Cat Hickory

Dick - Lizard Hickory
--- Barbara - Jabs Hickory
--- Wally - East Hickory (Wally WEST = East)
--- Koriand'r - Cilantro Hickory (Koriand'r = Coriander, the leaves of which are cilantro)
--- Linda Park - Windy Hickory
------ Mar'i - Parsley Hickory (same herb family as coriander)
------ Irey - Sunshine Hickory
------ Jai - Moonlight Hickory
Jason - Basin Hickory
--- Roy - Boy Hickory
------ Lian - Nail Hickory (Lian backwards)
------ Kids Roy and Jason took in from Crime Alley - Pie, Disk, Mud, and Bread
Cass - Lassie Hickory
Steph - Jeff Hickory
Tim - Hay Bale Hickory
Harper - Cellist Hickory (both string musicians)
Duke - Fluke Hickory
Cullen - Sullen Hickory
Damian - Mamie Hickory
Carrie - Scary Hickory
Jarro - Jello Hickory
Helena - Smiley Hickory
Terry - Porch Hickory (Terrence is similar to terrace, which is similar to porch)
Matt - Rug Hickory (a mat is similar to a rug)

Harley Quinn - Pretzel Hickory
--- Pamela Isley - Camilla Hickory
------ Pedro Pena - Tornado Hickory
------ Mary Batson - Gary Hickory
------ Billy Batson - Gilly Hickory
------ Freddy Freeman - Ready Hickory
------ Eugene Choi - Genius Hickory
------ Darla Dudley - Darning Hickory
Diana Prince - Banana Hickory
------ Donna Troy - Sauna Hickory
------ Cassie Sandsmark - Sandcastle Hickory
Kate Kane - Late Hickory
Iris West - Pupil Hickory (iris and pupil are both parts of the eye)
--- Barry Allen - Allen Hickory
------ Bart Allen - Poptart Hickory
Hal Jordan - Pal Hickory
Zatanna Zatara - Ze Hickory
Bette Kane - Gamble Hickory (bets = gambling)

Luke Fox - Juke Box Hickory
Lucius Fox (though he's not in the story) - Luscious Hickory

And the Kents are themselves because they're already known in Smallville.