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Duke Thomas was practically the human embodiment of the sun.
Bright, joyous yet fiery, and thrived in the day. He was the Signal, a sign of hope during the time when light prevailed, when Batman and the other various vigilantes didn’t patrol. Citizens almost knew him better than any of the other heroes.
Duke enjoyed the day patrol, he practically bathed in the sunlight, almost like a plant ready to grow. In a way that’s exactly what he was. A flower perhaps, growing each day.
Duke Thomas was Gotham’s daytime Bat Signal.
Duke Thomas was like a Dahlia; changed, different but him.
Duke Thomas was a boy, whether or not he had female parts or whether he used to be called something completely different.
Duke Thomas was the Signal.
And the Signal woke up with a sharp, agonising feeling in the lower part of his stomach, clutching it until he finally got up from his bed and went to the bathroom.
Duke opened the cupboard where he hid the pads, and wore one.
He hadn’t came out yet, why should he? He was inevitably going to run away eventually, like he always did. That’s what they always said. He was a run away child, and he’d end up leaving anyway.
Which was the plan, before being a fucking vigilante came into the equation and now everything was confusing. Originally, he ran away to find his parents, but now that they were found, stuck in a state of unrest and uncontrollable laughter, he had nothing to find. No family to look for, no family to love.
They hardly even knew him, their own son, just looked at him with the same sad look and the same strained smile. Duke bets they’ve probably lost themselves in that sad asylum in their mind that they’ve drowned in. They’ll never remember Elaine and Doug Thomas, the woman who welcomed everyone, the man who cracked jokes hoping to make someone’s bad day a tiny bit better. The parents who loved their daughter, and loved her when he became a son.
They’re nothing now, just empty corpses who still breathe.
The doctors said they were healing. The doctors were also fucking liars because his promised top surgery kept getting delayed.
Duke applied his testosterone gel on his skin then took off his shirt to shower. He looked at his chest, where a black binder clung. He remembered what his Ma said when she got him his first binder.
“Don’t wear it for too long, if I catch you, you’ll see what’ll happen!” She joked.
It’s safe to say he never saw what happened.
Duke kept it on, he’s not dealing with a period and the additional dysphoria of seeing his exposed chest.
After showering and getting into a simple vest and trousers, he headed down the stairs, where Alfred sat on the table, sipping tea quietly.
“Hey Alfred,” Duke greeted as he opened the door.
“Good morning, Master Duke. Heading for day patrol, I assume?” Alfred set his cup of tea down as Duke popped two slices of bread in the toaster.
“Mhm.”
He sat down on one of the other chairs and silence lingered. It was a habit for both of them, Alfred sipping tea and Duke getting ready to head off. Duke enjoyed these little mundane moments before he headed out. It was peaceful and quiet, it even made Gotham feel a little less shitty.
Duke could feel his eyes get teary and his vision went cloudy, so he quickly blinked the tears away.
Stupid fucking hormones.
He focused on eating his toast.
To make matters even worse, he got hit with an additional pain from his stomach and tried to refrain from keeling over. God, his cramps hadn’t been this bad in a while.
“Hey, do you know where the paracetamol pills are?” Duke tried to ask without sounding too much in pain.
“Ah, I believe Miss Cassandra has some in her room for, you know, women’s issues.” Alfred said casually, like he hadn’t unintentionally stabbed Duke ten times in the stomach.
Duke tried not to scream, and instead thanked Alfred and went to said room.
He knew Alfred had good intentions, of course he did, when Tim came out he baked a cake with the bi flag shown in the middle, so of course he wasn’t homophobic and insinuating that he wasn’t a man but a woman. Alfred didn’t even know that he wasn’t cis.
It was an honest mistake, one Duke would usually brush past because cis people are generally ignorant, but today, when it feels like his intestines are being pulled apart by The Rack? Everything feels a hundred times worse.
Duke creeped into Cass’ room, took note of her and Steph curled together in the duvet and placed his hands in front of him and very slightly started to glow.
Now a human flashlight, he delicately scrambled all over the room, trying to find the paracetamol. After circling the whole room, he turned back and saw Cass behind him.
“Agh-!” He screamed, before her hand clasped around his mouth and she pointed at Steph then signed ‘be mindful, she is sleeping.’
He signed back, hands aggressively moving ‘yeah well you fucking scared the life out of me, damn!’
‘Language.’
Duke flipped her off but still thanked her profusely when given the pack of paracetamol.
- - -
Duke headed down to the Batcave and wore his super-suit, and was ready to leave. He felt someone watching him, and he paused in his tracks.
Jason Todd cleared his throat.
Duke visibly relaxed then turned around to look at him. Jason was leaning against the Batmobile, a cocky smile plastered on his face.
“Hey Narrows, heading out?”
Duke snorted, “No shit, you just came back?”
“Yeah,” Jason rolled his eyes and pulled down the hood that had previously been masking his face. “Need to fill out a report now.
Duke made a point to make fun of him for it then half way got hit by ‘Aunt Flo’ violently attacking him.
Jason noticed how Duke faltered and how his hand went to clutch his stomach.
“… hey kid, you alright?” Jason placed a tentative hand on Duke’s shoulder.
“Yeah- I. Uhm. Stomach ache, not too bad,”
Jason paused. He didn’t know how to console someone, so instead went on to use humour to cheer up Duke.
“Oh, haha- what, you’re on your period or something?” Jason nudged him.
Duke tensed, looked at him and tried to keep it all together. Gods, he’d been awake for barely an hour and he was ready to throw himself out a window already.
“… hilarious.” Duke placed his helmet on his head and moved away, his voice distant and cold.
He knew Jason didn’t mean it, but it didn’t mean he needed to like it though.
Jason faltered, “Hey kid-“
“Jay!” Dick’s voice rang out. Duke rolled his eyes and took a deep breath.
“Didn’t know you’d be visiting- oh, hey Duke. Heading out?”
“Where the fuck else?” Duke snapped. The other two paused.
Dick knew Duke had some sort of dislike for him. A strong one even. He figured it was what happened during the whole We Are Robin thing, where Dick fed their information to the police. That was ages ago, but to be part of this family you have to have some sort of grudge held.
Duke glared from beneath the helmet, no one could see but it’s the thought that counted, and he sat on his motorbike and made a swift exit.
When he left, Dick sighed and leaned beside Jason on the wall.
“I think Duke hates me.”
“Aren’t you the smartest one in the class?” Jason said, sarcasm evident in his tone.
Dick elbowed him lightly then sat on the floor, where Jason then followed.
“I have no idea why,” he started. “I thought it might be the whole giving them into the police thing-“
“Yeah, that was shitty,” Jason added, helpfully.
“I am .. aware. But, I don’t know. He seems to harbour more hate for me than just for that.”
“Hey, I have a great idea! Why don’t you, I don’t know, ask him?”
“You think I haven’t tried, Jay? He ignored me! Blatantly!”
“Sounds like a you problem,” Jason shrugged, trying to act unbothered.
The picture of Duke’s immediate change in demeanour flashed through his head.
What did he say that had made Duke do that?
- - -
Okay, so maybe lashing out at Dick Grayson wasn’t the best idea, and maybe suddenly acting all detached with Jason wasn’t the most amazing thing to do.
Yeah, Duke realised that it was shitty. He also thankfully recognised that he needed a break, to take in a breath of fresh (or as fresh as Gotham can be) air, and soak in the nice, warm sunlight..
The comm in his helmet crackled to life. It took all of Duke’s willpower not to yank it out and step in the tracker and just run.
A familiar and soothing voice rang through it, ever so slightly calming him down.
“Duke,” Barbara greeted. “Why didn’t you tell me you had left? Everything okay?”
Gods, he hated how she always knew. Still, he was too stubborn to admit to any of that and lied.
“Yeah, of course. Where should I head first?” Duke subtly tried to steer the conversation away.
Barbara thankfully took the bait and gave him directions on what places to specifically target and keep a close eye on today.
“Hmm, head south, turn a corner. Gang activity suspected around there. Relatively easy to stop it from escalating.” Barbara directed, an undertone of suspicion there but just barely.
“Ah, ‘kay. Thanks Babs,” Duke said, hoping she wouldn’t question him.
Meanwhile, behind the comm, Barbara picked up on his change in tone, and as someone who’s worked with the Bats for way too many years of her life, she knew to let him have space.
Barbara continued directing him across the streets of Gotham, and he swiftly took care of most of them.
As his day patrol went on, his cramps went worse and worse, each one more intense than the other. Now if he wasn’t a meta-human, the pains would be less unbearable. But because the world seemed to hate him, whenever he felt pain, his powers seemed to ‘malfunction.’
And by that it means that all of his powers, from X-ray vision to electromagnetic spectrum vision would come and go, all at once.
The mixture of seeing into the future, the past, seeing light beyond the human iris, like light beams, infrared light, ultraviolet light-
It was all so so overwhelming,
Barbara’s voice was slowly getting drowned out in the background, her worried words falling onto deaf ears, and his hand went to grab on a nearby wall.
He was so sick of this, his cramps attacking him like Duke himself personally insulted them and their entire bloodline, the meds were doing jack-shit nothing, feeling so inhumane to just yearn to be born in the right body. To be cis.
The familiar feeling of detachment from his body had creeped up on him and suddenly his ability to breathe was a chore. He felt like he was suffering in this body, trapped, alone and slowly dying.
This wasn’t him, Duke wasn’t supposed to be in this form, where he has to pay just to experience true happiness rather than disgust upon seeing his body.
He was going to hell, he was going to rot in hell all because he wanted to experience the feeling of happiness.
Barbara’s voice became louder. “Duke, Duke! Can you hear me?”
Duke murmured out a “yeah, yeah-“
“What? Duke! Are you okay? No, god, obviously not. What’s happening? Shit. Shit. I’ll call Bruce-“
“No!” He choked out, instinctively, the first coherent thing Duke’s said since his meltdown began. He can’t let Bruce see, he’ll think he’s incapable. That he’s weak. That he’s not destined to be a vigilante.
What if he’s right?
‘Good grief, shut the fuck up!’ Duke mentally yelled at his self-deprecating inner voice.
He was the Signal. He would always be him. Even if he was her.
Her.
Her.
Her.. ?
- - -
Barbara Gordon was incredibly familiar with the Bat’s behaviourisms. From dating Dick to becoming Batgirl, and then Oracle.
Yeah, she probably knew these assholes better than they knew themself.
But Duke is.. different. She’s noticed since day one. For one, he’s a meta human, the only one who Bruce will ever allow in Gotham, which leads into her next point.
Duke is special, he’s not exactly odd, but different. He blends in, fits into the family, but in a way that’s ever so slightly imperfect, like a puzzle piece which doesn’t quite fit exactly in, or a circle that’s just slightly out of line.
It’s incredibly faint, but she notices.
It’s not exactly that he doesn’t fit, more like he’s trying hard not to. Almost as if he’s scared to have another family.
Barbara isn’t stupid, far from it, she knows what happened with his parents. Jokerised, permanently locked in a state of inhumanity and manic.
She couldn’t imagine how she would feel if her father went through that.
So Duke actively trying to distance himself from the family isn’t necessarily bad. She understands why he’s so adamant to do so. But it’s affecting him, the secrets he’s kept locked away from everyone, the same reassurance that he’s fine even though she knew that everyone thought that was bullshit.
The Bat Family (and co) are all brilliant detectives, they could figure out what’s wrong with Duke in under a minute.
It’s more of a case of privacy and morality. They could ask, but the answer would be no. And obviously they would listen.
But when Duke insists on not calling Bruce while he’s there, struggling to get a grip on himself?
Yeah, it’s time to break that rule and call Bats himself to console his child.
After informing Bruce, who immediately dropped everything and said he was on the way, she tried to console Duke.
If he hadn’t passed out in the middle of Gotham.
“Duke! Duke! Crap!” Barbara bit her lip and placed her head in her hands.
Thankfully, Bruce’s voice came from Duke’s comm.
“Got him. Go rest, Barbara, he won’t be patrolling anymore today.”
- - -
When Bruce got Barbara’s call, he knew immediately something was off.
And when he heard that Duke was currently rising up from a Stage Damian meltdown rapidly to a Stage Jason meltdown, he knew that Duke had probably been keeping all these emotions in for a while.
“Tim,” Bruce stood in front of his son. “Take care of my meeting. Please.”
The adolescent raised an eyebrow. “Again? What happened? Damian being pissy at school again-“
“Duke.”
Tim’s face dropped. “Duke? Shit, is he okay? I’ll cover, you can go.”
“Hn.” Bruce thanked and went off to help his …
Son?
It was strange, it always was strange whenever he took in another child. It takes time to get used to having them around all the time, to tell the media, to take care of them and memorise their specific needs.
But he cares. Bruce always does, even if the media tried to paint him as a neglectful father, or that he uses them just for clout, reputation or status or even just to stay relevant to the news.
No, he cared about his children, and that included Duke Thomas.
So seeing the usually happy child passed out on a building, face stained from tears.
It broke him, it always did.
Bruce picked him up tenderly, careful to not hurt or wake Duke up.
As soon as he arrived back at the Bat-cave, Bruce rushed to the medical bay, where Jason, Dick, Steph and Cass were already, helping Alfred.
Ah, so Tim had informed them already.
He lay Duke down on the bed and the got to work, took off his costume, where under he had a white tank top on and jeans.
“He had pains in his stomach, I think. That’s what I heard over the comms,” Barbara pushed her wheels to go into the room and provide support as well.
“Yeah,” Jason nodded. “Kid was clutching his stomach today.”
Cass signed ‘Duke also asked for paracetamol from me.’
Even Alfred contributed, saying how in the morning, he was complaining about his stomach.
So they turned Duke’s body around.
Shit.
On the lower back of his stomach was blood. A lot of it.
“Holy shit-“
“Duke-“ Bruce murmured. “Did he injure himself? He was probably cut or something, did anything happen yesterday’s patrol?”
Bruce turned to Barbara, as did Dick and Jason. She was looking at Cass and Steph, with a look in her eyes that they mirrored. Like they were communicating with their eyesight.
Barbara gave Cass a look who nodded before attempting to look under Duke’s tank top.
“Woah, woah, woah, there spooky,” Jason pulled Cass’ hand away. “What, pray tell, are you doing!?”
“Checking something.”
Jason was adamant until Barbara sighed and said. “We’re checking if there’s a binder, Jay.”
Jason’s face dropped and he paused. Then looked at her.
“Wait-“
“Yeah,” she murmured. “And if he does, it’ll make a lot more sense.”
Cass gently peeled the tank top off and, lo and behold, lay a black binder.
Bruce paused. He wasn’t an idiot, he pieced the pieces together. But he was… shocked. To say the least.
“Why didn’t he tell me?” Bruce murmured.
Jason suddenly looked incredibly guilty. Like he’d realised he probably said something wrong.
“Jason, what-“
Duke woke up, caught sight of everyone, his binder and his stained jeans and paused.
They knew.
They knew.
They knew.
“Hey, kid-“ Jason started.
“What. The. Fuck?” Duke said, bitterly. “Did you guys seriously- I wasn’t even- what the fuck! Shit. Shit, shit, shit-!”
“Duke, why didn’t you tell us? I could have-“ Bruce placed his hand on Duke’s back but he yanked it off.
“No! I don’t fucking owe you anything! Why did you- you could have asked before you checked!”
“Duke, you were bleeding!” Dick reasoned.
“Does it look like I give two flying fucks! God- I thought-“ Duke was crying now, wiping angry tears off his face furiously.
And while everyone was stunned, he ran upstairs.
- - -
He locked the door to his room and changed.
Wore baggy, black jogging bottoms and a loose top.
Got the suitcase he hit under his bag for emergencies (emergencies being running away in case the family went to shit) and was leaving out his window.
As he landed perfectly on the grass, eyes red and his hands shaky, he caught sight of a kid behind him.
“Thomas.” Damian Wayne raised his eyebrow. “Where do you think you’re going?”
Duke turned around, attempting to reassure Damian. He always had a soft spot for Damian, but when the kid caught sight of the suitcase, his face softened and dropped simultaneously.
“Oh.”
“Dami-“ Duke started.
“Thomas, it’s fine. Just… don’t be gone forever. Timothy probably already knows about you.”
Duke stopped and nodded. And before leaving, hugged Damian, suddenly feeling all sentimental and shit.
“I’ll text.”
“Of course you will.”
- - -
[FLASHBACK: a few months before]
Damian Wayne was fearless. He was scared of no one, and was never scared to say his mind. He had ‘no filter’ according to Todd. He wasn’t weak, and as such emotions were hardly easy to affect him.
But when he walked into Duke’s room,saw the bathroom door ajar with faint sobs-
He was… worried.
Damian walked into the bathroom, saw Duke washing a piece of clothing and Duke struggling to even hold it, and wordlessly took it from the older boy and washed it.
Duke, thankful for the help, fell back in the floor and just sobbed.
Silence.
“Tt, Mother taught me how to wash blood out of fabric efficiently. Did yours not, Thomas?”
“No,” Duke managed to choke out, his eyes closed against the wall, silent tears streaming down his face.
“… tt. I can teach you.”
Damian taught Duke, who was silent the whole time and let out occasional nods.
“And you’re done. Simple.”
Duke nodded, exhausted clear on his face.
“… Thomas. Are you.. okay?” Damian muttered.
“Honestly. No. I- fuck. I can’t deal with.. life anymore. You know.”
Damian nodded.
Silence.
“Damian, I wasn’t… born a guy.” Duke murmured, as if it was a bad thing and buried his face in his knees.
Damian nodded. “Very well, so be it. You are still a boy.”
“… what?”
“Tt- did you think I was going to shout? Is it because I’m Muslim?”
“What! No-“ Duke yelped. “I just. You’re not.. weirded out?”
“Thomas, with all due respect, you being a female at birth is not the most astounding thing I’ve heard all my life. It barely comes in the top three. Top ten if I’m being generous.”
Duke was silent.
“Damian. Do you think I’m going to hell?”
Damian snapped his head towards Duke, who seemed genuinely convinced he was.
“Of course not. God is all loving. Just because you’re a man now doesn’t mean anything.”
“… yeah I guess but… god, religious guilt sucks ass.”
Damian paused and then went red. “Yeah.”
Duke raised an eyebrow. Damian caught it and sighed.
“I am. Not. Straight, Thomas.” He had gone fully red now, and Duke blinked. Suddenly, he was enveloped in a warm hug.
“That’s fine. It’s. Yeah. It’s great.”
“As if I needed approval.” Damian scoffed. (He did.) “We will not go to hell for being queer. That is idiotic.”
“What if we do?” Duke sighed.
“Well, if we do.. well. At least we’ll be together, Thomas.”
“Haha-“
Duke hugged Damian for a while.
Then continued. “We’ll also be stuck with Tim.”
“Tt- Drake will have to learn his place.”
- - -
Duke left shortly after the long embrace with Damian, who swore to not tell anyone he was heading over to where Tim stayed in his ‘murder shack boat.’
When the door opened, a blonde man opened the door, and smiled when he recognised Duke.
“Hey Duke, here for Tim?” Bernard Dowd greeted.
Duke nodded, too tired to quip out a ‘no, I just came here for fun.’
Bernard glanced at the younger boy and noticed the tears as he led him through the boat.
“Bad day?”
“Don’t even get me started man…”
Bernard took Duke’s word for it and didn’t prod on.
“Babe! Duke is here for you!”
When Tim stepped out of the bathroom and caught sight of Duke, he ushered Bernard away and grinned.
“Hey man, everything okay?”
“Peachy.” Okay so maybe he wasn’t too tired. “I’m not going to beat around the bush. You heard?”
“Yeah, I’ve known for a while.” Tim sat down and Duke followed suit. “Not that you don’t pass but when you were looking for your parents and the hospital they were in, I kinda maybe saw your medical data and-“
Tim glanced at Duke, who looked so so tired and pulled him into a side hug.
“Sorry. You must feel like shit.”
“Yeah.” Duke agreed. “Can I… stay with you and Bernard today? Sorry if I’m intruding but. I just can’t go back today.”
Tim immediately softened and rubbed his hand over Duke’s back. “Dude, of course. You hit a Wayne child milestone. Running away for the first time and bunking at someone else's! Usually it’s Dick’s house in Bludhaven but I’m not complaining.”
“I’d never go to him first.”
“Yeah, I figured. Why?”
Why?
Why did he hate Dick?
“You know what he did. He sold us all out to the cops-“
“The We Are Robin movement?”
“Yeah. And, he’s never even. Apologised or addressed it. He wants us to be civil but. That shit stays with me forever, even if it doesn’t for him. That shit was traumatising, especially as a black kid. Getting handed to the police is the first thing I was taught. Because cops are just corrupt, white supremacist assholes.”
Duke registered there was literally a white person next to him.
“No offence.”
Tim waved him off. “None taken, you’re right. It was shitty. And a total dick move.”
Tim mentally patted himself on the back for the pun and Duke rolled his eyes. He then looked at Duke and punched him lightly.
“I’m proud of you.”
“Wha- what?!” Duke spluttered, suddenly turning flustered.
“You’ve handled yourself well, despite the hell you’ve endured. And you’re still going. That takes more strength than you’ll ever realise. But I see it, Duke. You’re a pretty fucking cool guy. I mean it.”
“I- don’t talk sappy to me man, I’ll start crying again.” Duke looked away, blinking away the tears and laughed to play it off.
Tim laughed as well, aware of his brother’s tears and lead him to the guest room to rest.
- - -
Jason hated the bats. Okay, maybe hate is a strong word, but he, at the very least, disliked them. The no killing rule was stupid, immoral and he stuck by that, and the Bats cementing that as his moral ground fucked shit up. And the others wordlessly following that instruction didn’t help.
However.
Jason had a soft spot for the newest member of his family. Duke Thomas, daylight protector, and in general a nice person.
Maybe it’s because he hadn’t tried to kill him. Yet. And he didn’t want to. He didn’t want to ruin this familial relationship by bringing violence and aggression into it like he always did. Jason wanted to preserve it, more than anything.
Maybe because Duke didn’t treat him like he was going to explode any second, he didn’t walk around eggshells around him.
Duke Thomas was a refreshing miracle child to this family.
But because Jason is a complete and utter idiot, he messed it up with ignorant words that he innocently thought would never cut deep into the other boy’s heart, something that would add salt to the already opened wound.
So it’s safe to say that Jason felt… bad. Guilty and that he desperately needed to apologise before he did anything rash or impulsive.
Contrary to popular belief, Jason Todd was not an idiot, for fuck’s sake he was also a detective, so coming to the conclusion that he had run off to Tim’s boat was fairly quick and easy to guess (about twenty minutes, max.)
He peered through the glass window in the guest room and caught sight of Duke in it and raised his hand to knock. Duke was silent, empty and he looked completely exhausted. Nothing like the Duke that was always chatting, energetic and full of life. Yeah, today must have been a rough day.
Before Jason knocked, he started questioning whether he should.
What if he’s mad?
What if I’m the last person he wants to see?
What if-
He knocked.
A few seconds later, Duke opened the window, saw Jason and just… wordlessly let him in and then continued to lie on the bed, face up.
Jason placed a bar of chocolate beside him and also a yellow beanbag.
“Got you your favourite chocolate. And a beanbag. It’s yellow, cuz you know… it’s your favourite-“
“Why are you here?”
Jason’s breath hitched then he took a deep breath. “I… want to apologise. For a lot of things. I mean for one, the period joke. I… didn’t know you could have a period and I was trying to lighten up the mood and- just. Sorry. And also I’m sorry for not being the best…”
Brother? Would Duke like that?
“For not being the best. Brother.” Jason choked out. “And. You know, just in general, I’m not the best person to be around so thank you for being there for me and not… treating me differently.”
Duke blinked as he looked at Jason on the bed, head in hands, voice a quiet murmur-
He sat down beside him with his hands behind his back. “Dude it’s.. it’s fine. I didn’t tell anyone apart from Damian.”
“Hold up, you told the demon spawn?”
“It’s a long story,” Duke waved his hand dismissively. “But as I was saying, it’s not your fault. It’s no one’s but mine. I blew things out of proportion when you guys didn’t even know I was trans.”
“Why?”
“Pardon?”
“Why didn’t you tell us? About everything?” Jason questioned.
“… because.. I don’t know. I guess I’m scared? Of having another family? I just… I ran away from every single foster home I was previously in, and the fact that this one is so good, so permanent? It scared me. So I was waiting for something bad to happen so I could run, like I always did. I guess I chose this whole situation to be the reason I ran.”
“God, kid. Whether you like it or not, we’re going to be your family. Your other foster homes I heard were shit. Us? We’re going to make sure you’re included, so please,” he placed a hand on the other boy’s shoulder, “Stop running from us. You don’t need to run away, even if you’re scared. Kid, this place, this family, is so hard to get away from. Hell, I fucking died and I’m still included in the family game nights!”
Duke laughed softly, wiping his eyes and Jason smiled softly.
“Listen kid, if they can accept me after all I did, we will always accept you. Hell, I think Bruce is already trying to get a private surgeon to undergo your top surgery when you come back.”
Jason nudged Duke playfully. Duke smiles and then sighed.
“Sorry then. For worrying you.” A pause. “And.. you’re welcome, I guess. For not treating you differently. And thank you as well.”
“Thank me for what?”
“For being a good big brother.”
Jason faltered and his eyes widened. His eyes were wet with unshed tears and he thought that maybe, just maybe, he could be good again.
Duke embraced Jason, who melted into the warmth that Duke naturally emitted and hugged his little brother back.
- - -
When Duke returned, it was a few days after he bunked with Tim and Bernard.
And Bruce was a mess, according to Jason, probably one of the sole reasons he came back earlier than he wanted to.
Duke knocked on the door and smiled when Alfred opened it.
Alfred let out a faint sigh of relief and gestured to Bruce’s study room.
“Master Jason said you would be coming, Master Bruce is in his study.”
Duke nodded, thanked Alfred and slowly opened the door to Bruce’s study.
And there, in the flesh, was Bruce Wayne being a frantic mess, papers scattered everywhere, fingers buried deep in his hair and eyes that drooped so low that Duke would have believed he hadn’t slept since he left.
“Bruce.”
The man’s head snapped up and he rapidly tried to compose himself.
“Duke. You’re back. Hi. Uh. When did you-“
Duke cut the older man off, abruptly. “Dude, are you okay?”
“I’m just trying to sort out your top surgery thing… and no, don’t feel guilty. Take is an apology if you will. Gods, it must be so hard to be trans- why is there so much paperwork!”
He then headed to Duke and held his shoulders. “But how are you?”
Duke’s throat tightened and he looked down.
“Fine. I mean, I’m okay. I guess. Just still frazzled from everything and also just. Cautious of everything. But thank you, Bruce.”
Duke Thomas seemed to tend to do this thing where if he felt vulnerable, like now, being on the brink of tears, he would withhold information to avoid opening up. Now Duke obviously realises this is pointless, hell, this is a family full of shit good detectives so no one is gonna believe him but… you know, old habits die hard.
Bruce frowned and tilted Duke’s head up, gently and raised an eyebrow.
“Are you sure?”
“Not really,” Duke breathed out. “But I don’t particularly wanna go into it right now. Sorry.”
“That’s okay. You don’t have to, you don’t even need to tell me. You can tell Dick, Jason, Cass… anybody. We’re all here for you. You know that right? I can even get you a therapist. Do you want a therapist? I can arrange tha-“
Duke put his hands up and his eyes widened before he started laughing. “Nah man, it’s alright. I’ll pass. Thanks for the offer though. I’ll keep it in mind.”
Silence.
“Hey Bruce? I just wanna say… thanks.”
“Huh… how come?”
“Thank you for being here for me. And for taking care of me. You’re a good father.”
Bruce’s breath hitched and he just froze. Then the familiar paternal love rose up in him and he embraced Duke, lovingly.
“Thank you for being a good son.”
Bruce pretended not to notice how Duke tightened his grip around him.
- - -
Duke stood outside Gotham General Hospital, his mind and thoughts all over the place. This wasn’t abnormal, he usually experienced this before seeing his parents, his mind filled with stupid and unrealistic thoughts suggesting that they’ve magically woken up or him visiting them will spark their memory even if he visits every three days.
Duke sighed and walked to the receptionist- today it was Talika, the young receptionist who still wore her signature bindi on her forehead and had mehndi on her arm that stretched all the way up her arm.
“Hey Talika, how was your brother’s wedding?” Duke smiled and attempted small talk.
“Oh, hey Duke. Yeah it was good, me and my wife were so busy planning - I’m glad it’s done. Room 43 again?”
Duke nodded and thanked her when she checked him in.
They were in the special ward, for citizens who had been almost permanently (or permanently) affected in terms of their state of mind, with specialised doctors and nurses. That didn’t calm him down, because it just meant that even with the best help, his parents were still far from recovery.
He entered the familiar room, the blinding lights and the sparkling clean floors looking back at him.
Nurse Isaiah nodded at him then, wordlessly leaving the room to give him and his parents space, not without patting Duke on the back. It was uncomfortably silent, as he stared at his parents who grinned back at him, with that uncanny smile and those eyes that never seemed to close.
Fortunately for Duke, they were tame today, not causing absolute havoc and destruction in the room so he took it as an opportunity to talk.
“Hey Mom, Dad. How have you been? I came out to everyone else, are you proud? I mean, it was accidental and it’s like a whole thing I don’t wanna get into but yeah! Are you guys proud?”
No reply.
“Yeah and Bruce has been so so supportive, I mean he’s gonna get me a whole ass private surgeon just to get my top surgery done. You guys would love him, I’m sure. He’d love you guys too. He's a good dad, despite everything. But you guys are obviously my number ones- haha..”
Elaine tilted her head and started to laugh, slowly at first then more uncontrollably. Duke tried to tune it out and kept talking.
“Yeah. Yeah it’s been goin’ good I mean-“
Her laughs went louder and Doug Thomas also joined in, the room drowning in forced laughter that haunted his dreams.
“Guys- please stop…”
They didn’t.
“Please-“ Duke closed his eyes. He let the tears fall. “I miss you guys…” he murmured.
When he opened his eyes, his mother was right in front of him, her unnatural smile and tilted head staring into him.
“Shit-“ he fell back. “Mom, you scared the hell out of me-“
She retreated before going to the wall and banging her head against it, still laughing and getting more aggressive.
“Mom-“
She didn’t stop, tears still streaming as she laughed and his father’s laughter became louder.
It was so overstimulating, Duke tried to calm him down and to stop her but nothing worked, he grabbed a chair for support and tried to regain his breath.
Nurse Isaiah immediately came in and ushered him out, insisting he focus on his health right now and he’ll calm down his parents.
Too lazy to argue, Duke agreed and sat on a nearby bench. A pair of legs sat down next to him and then spoke.
“How were they today, Thomas?” Damian asked.
“Okay. But just. Scary.” Duke murmured and rested his head on his younger brother’s shoulder and closed his eyes. “How was school?”
Damian tensed but then relaxed after a few seconds. “Tt, school was boring. I practically know everything in the syllabus and I could probably teach better than the teacher himself- he’s incompetent, Thomas, I’m telling you-“
As Duke listened to his brother ramble about school and the incompetent teachers and the incompetent students and the incompetent time table, he thought.
Maybe this family is finally one worth living for.