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"Hey, can I tell you something?"
This whole conversation was a routine; a routine White Lily knew all too well. She and Pure Vanilla had gotten quite close over the span of their time of shared studies at the Academy, but White Lily has slowly been garnering feelings for Pure Vanilla that she strongly believes he doesn't reciprocate. Pure Vanilla had once mentioned that no matter what, she could confide him with anything without causing any rift in their friendship. Those very words are a constant on and off switch for White Lily's motivation to finally say what she feels, although Pure Vanilla would most likely friend-zone her with no bad intentions.
The very problem is, the weight of Pure Vanilla's memorable words fade away at the worst times.
"I have to tell you something," or, "can I tell you something?" she always begins, and every single time, when Pure Vanilla shifts his attention over to her, looking at her with that sincere, expectant gaze, her river of words runs dry as she begins to get flustered. And every single time, Pure Vanilla chuckles in understanding, completely unknowing of her attraction towards him. Never has there been a time where he pressures her to continue, and when she's ready, he'll be there, listening to every single word that pours out of her mouth with his undivided attention. That's just one of the many reasons why White Lily couldn't help but fall for Pure Vanilla.
"Of course!" Pure Vanilla replies cheerfully. Now with a lack of confidence, White Lily averted her gaze as she muttered out, "never mind."
Per usual, as things go in this friendship, Pure Vanilla beamed at her as he placed a hand on her shoulder. "It's alright, you can tell me when you're ready."
She met his gaze and merely nodded in appreciation without a word to be said. Dang it. Years and years would fly by, they would graduate and most likely part ways, and she still wouldn't be capable of saying those three words that have been stuck down her throat for oh so long. Those three little words that have such an unnecessary weight on her. I love you.
White Lily was right, and she absolutely despised that. It's been nearly a decade, and although she and Pure Vanilla still remained extremely close, her sorry self could never make their friendship go to the next level, and the urge for her to say something did nothing but increase discomfortingly. Thankfully, Pure Vanilla never changed and continued to be an absolute sweetheart.
Her constant reassurance all these years was the simple thought of thinking this could never get worse. Pure Vanilla would never leave her side, and that’s all that matters, right?
Haha, right?
Nope. Wrong.
This duo was so successful, overflowing with potential, that they became promoted to “ancients.” As long as Pure Vanilla was involved, blessing her with his company, she would be satisfied. What she didn’t know would be tragically entailed was that they would be faced with emotionally, as well as physically, burdening obstacles with some “beasts” trying to take their Soul Jams, the precious objects they were meant to protect. The source of immense power.
To everybody’s sweet relief, though, every single ancient pushed through and defeated their respective beast. Not only that, they grew as better people. The thing is, unlike the other ancients that scornfully cut ties with their beasts, Pure Vanilla did the opposite and chose to get closer with his beast, Shadow Milk, no matter how much Shadow Milk opposed to the thought. Normally, White Lily wouldn’t take this information as an abnormality since it’s habitual of Pure Vanilla to befriend people, regardless of their past, but she’s confident she knows Pure Vanilla enough to know there’s something more to his usual cheerful demeanor. Yes, she is positive, although possibly overreacting, that Pure Vanilla is catching feelings for his former trickster of an opponent.
Against her better judgement, that assumption blinded simple thought and forced her to discard any more attempts to make that sweet being fall for her. Plus, to further downgrade her already dwindling hope, Pure Vanilla slowly started to talk more, more, and more about that darned Shadow Milk. Words of praise for someone else coming from Pure Vanilla shouldn't be leaving such a burning pain in White Lily's heart, yet it does.
Pure Vanilla keeps saying things such as, oh, how he knows that "there's good inside of him." Or, oh, how he is certain that "all Shadow Milk needs is a friend to accompany him."
Pfft, just say he's so perfect at this point.
It has officially been around three months that Pure Vanilla began his friendship with that deceitful jester. White Lily and Pure Vanilla were walking down the streets of Pure Vanilla's kingdom, chatting about the usual with a hint of affection towards Shadow Milk that White Lily still doesn't understand. What does he have that she doesn't?
Shadow Milk is a liar, caused immense burdens on Pure Vanilla back then, and barely gives any attention to Pure Vanilla at all. How could someone be attracted to someone even she can obviously tell doesn't even like as a friend? As time passes by, she can tell that eventually, this disloyal thing would break Pure Vanilla's heart. The thing is, if she says something about it herself, she's going shatter his heart first, and White Lily would absolutely hate herself if that were what's to come.
Apparently, she had been pondering over the situation so greatly that she had stopped talking, or even listening, to Pure Vanilla. Her eyes went blank as she stared at the ground with mechanical steps. White Lily's face showed no emotion but one with intense thought.
Pure Vanilla caught instant note of this, stopping his stride to grab White Lily's arm so she could snap out of her trance and look at him without taking a step further.
At the warm touch of Pure Vanilla, she plummeted back to reality, stopping to turn towards him in one swift motion.
Pure Vanilla simply huffed an amused laugh, shaking his head. "You never change do you, Lily?"
There was a beat of serene silence between the two of them. Neither of them did more than breathe as they kept their gazes on each other that could say a thousand words. That is, until White Lily slowly averted her gaze, which was a sign for Pure Vanilla to continue.
"You never change," he repeated slowly as if he were testing the feel of the words out, "so tell me, what's bothering you so much?"
Because of her averted gaze, White Lily was blind to the fact that Pure Vanilla's initial light was replaced with what seemed like genuine concern. At the mere sight of that, she had forgotten all for what she was embarrassed for; all for what kept stopping her all those years ago.
Well then, it's now or never.
"Do you like Shadow Milk?"
The words were straightforward, and White Lily was completely aware. She wasn't going to stall to the point where things go the way they always do. White Lily needed to do something now. There's no more backing out for her.
Pure Vanilla's eyes widened momentarily. He expected a lot of things, but he never expected her to cut to the chase of her worries so directly.
So this was what was spinning around in Lily's mind.
"Oh, I like him just as how I like everybody!" he announced grandly. Dang, did White Lily really misinterpret this situation that badly?
White Lily had trouble speaking as she was stammering out a reply. "But- the way you guys talked, and everything at all. Are you sure there wasn't anything more you felt? Really, nothing more?"
There it was. Pure Vanilla was glad he was finally putting the pieces together. It gave him an opportunity to comfort her, to tell her that it's not that way, although he truly doesn't understand why it gets to her so much. This being is so dense right now; he can't even tell she was feeling just the smallest speck of jealousy in desires of his more than friendly affection. The very stupidity of his density, though, is that Pure Vanilla has reciprocated those feelings for White Lily so dearly this entire time, yet he has had a way easier time keeping it a secret. How the heck could he not tell he's getting what he's wanted from her all this time?!
Shaking his head, he spoke softly, “We were just friends. What, did you really think I had a romantic interest in Shadow Milk?”
White Lily shook her head slowly. She knew she misinterpreted the situation big time, so she didn’t pay much attention to Pure Vanilla as she decided to drown in her embarrassment instead.
“No, Lily, not at all!” he reassured. Pure Vanilla then took White Lily’s hand gently into his, giving it a light squeeze.
That caused White Lily to stop drowning in embarrassment. She fell out of that river and went back into the safe ground of reality, no matter how unbelievable this seems right now. Pure Vanilla instantly caught note of that blush creeping up in White Lily’s face who still can’t believe this is happening.
She’s just overreacting, though. He’s just doing it in a friendly manner.
But what Pure Vanilla said was far from just a “friendly” statement.
“Lily, can’t you see? Ever since we’ve been in the academy, I’ve only liked you.”
“You should’ve said something sooner!” Her face was red while she complained to Pure Vanilla. Everything would’ve been so much easier for her if he had said something sooner.
White Lily dragged a hand up to her face. “We would’ve gotten over it sooner if you had said something back at the academy.”
“Oh, right,” he rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. “My bad!”
This confession wasn’t supposed to take a decade to come, but it was worth it nonetheless.