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Part 2 of Video Essayists Examine Hatchetfield
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Published:
2025-11-26
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Why is Night Light Blinky [CLASSIFIED]

Summary:

What is Night Light Blinky? Where did Night Light Blinky come from? Who made Night Light Blinky? Where am I, Night Light Blinky? Can you help me?

Notes:

This silly video essay series somehow got a spiritual sequel! This was really fun to do and think about how this Hatchetfield timeline would attract certain internet sleuths

Work Text:

NOTE:

This tape is now the property of the U.S. Government and must not be tampered with. 

If you are watching this, you are a member of PEIP and should treat this as both a record and a safety hazard. Initially intended to be a video essay entitled “Why is Night Light Blinky” released on Youtube by one [REDACTED], otherwise known as “@HBomberGuy”, the contents of this video would certainly bring negative attention from beings both of this earth and not. 

Please use discretion.

 

BEGIN TRANSCRIPT:

 

Youtube has become a significantly different landscape recently.

 

Now, I'm sure it's not a surprise for me to point that out - everyone and their brother has talked about COPPA and demonetization and the algorithm and everything incessantly. Doing things for the sake of 'protecting the children' has become more of a reason to censor information on civil rights and political issues more than anything, tale as old as time. Even with these 'protections' put in place, Youtube's platform now more than ever seems to be a base for advertisers to swoop in and grab our pocketbooks with their grubby claws. 

But I want to focus on that for a moment - targeted advertising. 

The idea that a company can use data to pinpoint the needs and desires of the consumers has been a business since 1995. This is nothing new. It hasn't always worked, but usually, if you clicked on this site and went here, oh look, how did you guess I was looking for... kitchenware, wow! 

 

[prolonged stare at camera] that was the first thing I typed in-- 

 

Youtube, however...Youtube has been a different story. It always shows the content based on your metadata, or what you've been watching. Gaming videos may show you gaming ads. Perhaps it will track your other websites and show you ads related to their products. More than ever, Youtube has been inundated with ads, and they've been using Premium as a way to jack up profits for them while doing little legwork on their part to improve quality for now paying customers. 

 

And yet... There's one ad that just won't go away. No matter what your demographic, what you've been looking for, the products you've bought, you've seen this ad. And there's recently a glitch that Premium users have also been getting it. 

The Night Light Blinky Doll. 

 

[clip plays]

'Deep in the woods of Drowsytown....

"Take a look, Sniggles!"

"WOW!"

The nights aren't ever dark with Night Light Blinky!' 

 

But, as you probably already know if you clicked on this video, though it started on Youtube, it didn't stop there. 

 

[News Anchor clip plays]

'The people are abuzz with excitement with a toy advertisement that has been airing continuously on television stations for the last week - a company the station has never heard of.'

 

[Instagram Reel with the caption "me when the blinky ad shows up on my feed again"]

'Was Uncle Wiley like an old 80's company or something that came out of retirement? This thing seems SO FAMILIAR!'

 

This advertisement has reached meme status in the month since its release. In the span of 3 weeks, this Blinky thing has somehow surpassed the level of popularity Labubu only got to in 24. At the time of recording, it's November now, and very close to the date of this exciting new toy's release - Black Friday. And yet, the very core of this commercial still remains a mystery. 

 

How did it get everywhere, and get everywhere so fast? 

And why does this man have two layers of denim on? 

 

Seriously, who the hell does that--?

 

[HBomberGuy intro plays]

 

Starting simply just by looking at the ad and some statistics around where it's airing, we can already pin down a few concrete details:

  1. Night Light Blinkies are sold and manufactured by Uncle Wiley Toys, which was founded in 2006 by "Wiley" himself, according to their website. No full name, probably not to break the illusion for children who visit the site, but it says here that he apparently was "sailing through the dark until he discovered his love of toys!" How...charming.
  2. As for their absence in the public eye until 2024, it's probably due to their lack of relevancy until this point, as it's apparently a mostly local factory making small, standard toys. It's based in a small town in Michigan. 

This will be important later.

  1. Most obviously but most importantly, there was a number that you could call. Maybe I could reach out directly to the source and– it's automated. Of course it's automated. It would never be that easy.

It was fascinating just how big this had gotten for just how little had been shared about the actual company. But hey, let's give them the benefit of the doubt. They could’ve had to scramble around a little with their newfound popularity, being a small little company thrust into America's eyes. That... somehow has the funding to broadcast on nearly every platform with a screen. 

Hm. 

Looking through to other television stations who had released articles about it (except for Youtube, of course, you sucky, sucky hellscape), it seems that every one started broadcasting on a semi-daily basis at the exact same time - 8 PM. Perhaps it was some sort of station interference... but the area that could occur would be way too small. There is the idea that the company had sold onto another toy company that just listed their brand as the conglomerate, making that the reason for it to be so "mysterious". That seems pretty plausible. 

But here is where things start to get...odd.

[REDACTED] and I emailed several of the news stations and Youtube about the commercial, hoping to get more of their insights beyond the basics of any signs of interference, tampering, or toy companies Uncle Wiley’s might have signed on with. 

Youtube… ignored us pretty much, but almost every other station responded with some version of the following.

“Hi! Thanks for reaching out! Fortunately, we had figured out that the Night Light Blinky doll was always meant to be broadcasted with us, and we had made a clerical error on our part. We are currently writing retractions for our previous articles.”

Everyone just…made a mistake? Look, I don’t have the fullest faith and trust in the current television industry, but that still feels like a far stretch. Everyone makes mistakes, but this many? On this level? 

Something just felt off in this whole thing, and I couldn’t pinpoint why. Perhaps I should just write it off as one of those funny little corporate quirks and leave it at that. 

 

But then it hit me. Not an answer to any of it, no, but another question. 

 

The Night Light Blinky, from looking at both the ad and the product itself, seems like it belongs in a different time. It's really quite charming. We've got this weird dude dressed up as a funny little sailor mascot, which seems right out of the 90's, as well as the other… Sniggles?? That follow him around?? What are these things? Does anyone know? It’s going to bug me. And the toy itself would fit right in with the As Seen on TV products of the 2000's. Does anyone still know what a Pillow Pet is? Stuff like that.

In any case, it’s really nice to see simple, fun advertising with no digital frills for once. Just a nice little plush the children sure do love.

They do love it!

…
Do they love it?

Who is the Night Light Blinky for?

 

Really ask yourself for a minute. Have you heard or seen any kids talking about this thing? From what I’ve seen on social media, the baseline for people talking about this or making content about this is 25 at the least. 8PM airtime? Kids aren’t watching TV at 8PM. That’s when Mom and Dad sit down to watch the news or see Saving Private Ryan on cable. 

“Nobody watches cable anymore,” I can hear you typing already. Well, I have checked Youtube and Youtube Kids - this ad isn’t flagged for kids. According to the demographics on this video - the one thing that Youtube is good for here - this video isn’t being seen by them. 

Toy crazes have always had kids front and center when it comes to asking and pleading to their parents about what they want.

In fact, recently, there was a poll done around 2 weeks ago that just got published, asking which toys and games children wanted most for Christmas. 50 were on the list of those polled - Blinky did not crack the top 40, much less the top 5. (If you’re wondering what number 5 was, it was indeed the new Fortnite Battle Pass). 

Honestly, I don't blame the kids! 

"What would you like for Christmas, little Timmy? A game where you can explore fantastical worlds and wear a banana costume, or the creature that stares at you while you sleep?"

I feel like more than anything, this is nostalgia bait. A Care Bear, an Ugly Doll, a Cabbage Patch Kid wrapped up in a new refreshing monster-based packaging for all the grown-ups who miss being young and fun and at least a little edgy. A lot of the comments I’ve seen on the product affirm as much. Add it up with a company that hasn’t been active in decades and something that just started appearing everywhere, and you’ve got yourself a complete scam, preying on people’s sense of joy. 

Blinky dolls are as real as the mysterious old “sailor” that sells them.

 

Oh… how I wish that were the case. 

 

I pivoted to talk with some folks on various social media sites who had been the most genuinely excited about Blinky, and among the various comments of “he’s just such a little creature” or “my daughter would just love him” was this very interesting exchange. I have agreed with their wishes to keep them anonymous. 

 

Its really nice to see blinky again on a bigger stage. he was creepy, but i always thought of him as a comfort.

H: “Again”?

yea, I was crushed when they shut down watcher world. 

 

Watcher World?

How the hell did I miss this?

Watcher World, for most of you that don’t know, was an abandoned boardwalk theme park in Hatchetfield, Michigan. I told you we were going to come back here. It turns out our old friend Blinky used to be a now unknown theme park mascot, though a lot of this can just be google searched! Look, there’s the Sniggles and Mr. Wiley man! May they forever haunt my dreams. 

Honestly, a little off topic, I’ve been working on writing this video for a few days, and I’ve genuinely started to have nightmares about these things.

…

 

I've been talking a LOT. 

I'm getting water, and YOU SHOULD TOO. 

 

Ok, I'm back, and you didn't even KNOW because that edit was so seamless. Everyone say thank you to my editor [REDACTED] - and [REDACTED], when you get to this part, I need to say that I'm so sorry for the wild goddamn adventure I've taken us on.

 

Anyways, I’m not really the best person to talk about rundown theme parks. There are plenty of people who are more qualified than I. Take Kevin Defunctland for instance, who does fantastic research work on these types of topics. Hey, look at that! His most recent video from a year ago is on this exact topic! It has a surprising low number of views for this channel - 50k may seem large for some, but compared to the multiple videos he’s made that go into the millions, this is especially odd. 

Odder still that there has been no activity or record from Kevin in the time since he posted the video. No fanfare, no posts, nothing. 

And yes, people can leave the internet for a while, especially someone who does long form content. I am one of those people. 

But he’s not the only one. 

There have been a number of people, especially urban explorers who went into the Hatchetfield Boardwalk, that have gone missing, starting around when the park closed in 2005 and 2006. I am not going to show their names or faces here, as I feel like that would be severely crossing a line. 

But there remains a constant throughout all of this. 

Anyone who comes too close to this doll, anyone who tries and raises any points about it, seems to be either obscured or silenced. Blinky is always watching, it seems, and those who do not want to go along with the loving fandom that has cropped up around him are being targeted. 

 

…am I a conspiracy Youtuber now? Is this where I’m at? This fucking PLUSH??

But oh god, buckle up, people. There is one more thing I haven’t shared with you. 

It’s really been bugging me that we don’t even know Wiley’s last name. SOMETHING to ground this man into our database, ANYTHING other than a stupid mascot. Maybe it’s a deepfake of a stock photo as the face of a larger corporation. Maybe it’s some kind of AI amalgamation. I took a picture of this man’s face and reverse image searched it. 

After pages and pages of looking through the ad clips, I found this. 

This is a picture from an article dated around 2000. 3 men are shown as new hires in the U.S. military. 

Shown here is John Macnamara, Charles Coven, and Wilbur Cross.

 

Wilbur Cross was declared missing in action in 2005. 

 

So let me ask you. 

 

Who the HELL is WILBUR CROSS–?

 

[The remainder of this video has been redacted for safety purposes.]

 

END TRANSCRIPT.

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