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Mike Wheeler got scared, too.
He hid it pretty well, most of the time. Planning and scheming, finding a way to overcome the big, big bad, never hiding behind anyone to face off anything that wanted to destroy him and his family. His best friends.
His best friend.
He had felt more like himself than he had for years when they planned their last crawl, when it was them again. All of them. More insane plans had gone down in Hawkins eons ago; there was no use crying over half of them lost in the Upside Down.
And for better or worse, they had El. And Hopper, Steve, Dustin… His sister. If anyone could save Holly, then them. Of course he was scared for them, so much that it physically hurt him sometimes, but he had a job to do.
That was who Mike Wheeler was. He didn’t crumble and stop for breaks; he kept going. And he had a whole lot of trust in the people sorting out this mess elsewhere.
Weirdly enough, he had also trusted Derek, a kid so far removed from listening to any authority that it had been almost comically funny, but one ‘Delightful Derek’ from Joyce, and he had been gone.
So yes, Mike Wheeler got scared, too. There was an underlying fear in his body, but it had been there since he was 12 years old, ever since Will had gone missing. Fear like that never went away, truly. But he had gotten used to it, and overshadowed it by a sprinkle of optimism. They were going to get all of the kids out, and so far away from Hawkins that Vecnas’ Demogorgons would go crazy searching for them in the process.
A good plan. Not completely refined at the edges, but a good plan nonetheless.
And then it all went to shit.
Stupid, stupid pipes and stupid military and stupid-
When he had been walked out of the complex by the military, he had been scared, too. Something had flared up in his stomach, so much stronger than the fear he had been feeling the entire day. A protective instinct for these kids, who were only trying to survive, who had no idea what was going on. Who were so much more scared than he deserved to be.
And he wanted to get them to the tunnels so badly that his heart hurt. If he did it with his last breath, he would get them out. He had to.
For a child who had been just as scared, that didn’t have anyone protecting and believing him, that had been abandoned in the Upside Down for weeks on end.
For Will.
Knowing what was awaiting these kids in there was terrifying.
And then Will broke down.
Sometimes Mike felt like some of his pain receptors were attached to Will's body. There was a physical, aching pain deep under his left pectoral, right over his heart. It hurt so bad that he almost collapsed too, trying to get to Will nonetheless, while keeping the kids safely behind him, keeping them safe.
Keep them safe.
It felt like Will speaking to him. Selfless, selfless Will, telling him not to go running towards him, telling him to stay put and protect the children, protect little him like he never could before. Because he had been a child himself.
Demogorgons burst from the ground and oh god-
It felt like an end. It felt like everything they had worked for had gone up in flames, literally. He watched the kids being taken away to the Upside Down, and the fear was back.
Slowly, his eyes slid to Will.
Yes, Mike Wheeler got scared, too.
But not like this. Never like this.
Vecna, being so close to Will, having him floating in the air, set something off, buried deep inside of him.
It was as if he couldn’t breathe. Lying there, in between ashes and bodies, fire lighting up everything around him, and his lungs just wouldn’t cooperate. He couldn’t do much but lie there, his shoulder aching in a heinous reminder of his fall against the bathroom wall, and all he could think about was Will.
When Will fell to the ground, it felt like relief and agony at the same time. As if his heart was breaking in two, seeing his best friend in so much torment.
All he wanted to do was run to him, make sure he was okay.
Because that was his best friend, wasn’t it?
Anyone would want to make sure their best friend was okay after facing off with the worst kind of creature Mike had ever seen.
But that didn’t happen.
He shakily got up on his feet, but before he could make any kind of attempts towards Will, one of the Demogorgons materialized in front of him.
Oh. Mike thought. That’s how I die.
His hands came up to shield him from worst, he knew it wouldn’t be a quick death. But all he could think about, all that went through his head, was only- if it’s me the Demogorgon is after, Will could have enough time to flee.
The fear in his body thrummed, but it also felt liberating. It felt okay. Offering his life up on a silver platter for Will– Yeah, he would do it every time. He would come back from the afterlife just to do it all over again.
He closed his eyes, waiting for the pain, excruciating pain, before he could pass on– but it never came.
The screeching didn’t stop, but it felt stagnant. Like it was rooted in one place.
Slowly, he lifted his arms from his eyes, his eyes opening reflexively.
What the fuck-
The Demogorgon was suspended in the air, one hand still outstretched, reaching for Mike. He saw it trembling, trying its hardest to rip into him, but it couldn’t reach him. Why couldn’t it reach him?
His first thought was El. Maybe she had made it out of the Underworld, together with Dustin, Nance, and everyone else, maybe they found Holly, even.
But then his eyes slid to Will.
And something crumbled inside of him.
It felt like years of walls coming down, a feeling so strong flooding his body that he felt lightheaded, so close to passing out. Will's hand was outstretched, his eyes rolled back in his head. He was still wet from the pipes, just as Mike was, but the only thought that crossed his mind was that Will looked utterly, devastatingly gorgeous.
Beautiful.
I knew it. I knew it.
He felt his heart go haywire, pulsating so hard he was scared for a second that it would jump out of his body, onto the ground. Mike wasn’t too concerned about it. If it were to happen, he would just offer it up to Will anyway. He could keep much better watch over it, anyway.
He couldn’t tear his eyes from him, head shot back, both arms stretched in different directions. It was as if Mike were glued to him, his whole body belonging not to himself anymore, as if it had belonged to him, ever, after all. It felt so foreign and so right at the same time, like-
It felt like coming home.
Mike’s head snapped up when he saw Will pull his hands towards himself. A sickening crunch echoed through the MAC-Z, the Demorgorgon's limbs being ripped apart.
It crashed down in front of him, and it should’ve made Mike want to throw up, slimy creature so distorted that it should’ve made him sick to watch, but he had only eyes for Will.
Will, who was on his knees, whose eyes slowly slid back to his normal, warm eye colour. He looked… out of this world. Devine.
Hot.
Mike’s breath caught in his throat when he saw Will's hand lift to his nose, slowly wiping away blood. Blood. God, Mike felt ready to collapse.
It must be the fire. It had to be the fire, right? Why he suddenly felt so hot. Why it felt as if walls were caging him in, breath getting shorter, only while staring in Will's eyes, who were locked on the Demogorgon in front of him, so intense, so-
“Will!”
Joyce's voice rang out, and Mike startled so badly that he tripped over himself. Oh God, he had almost forgotten about Joyce. And Will-
He scrambled up, running and running until he collapsed in front of Will, who was dangerously swaying. He reached him before Joyce, and without much thought, he pulled him straight against his chest.
“Oh, Will.”, he whispered in his hair, pressing his chin against his head. “You’re amazing, god.”
“You’re okay?” came Will’s strained voice back, hidden in Mike’s wet shirt. He was shaking, and Mike did his hardest to seem like a steadfast wall, to hold him, to catch him if he fell, as if he weren’t the one who felt faint too.
“Am I okay?” he whispered frantically, too scared to break something between them with shouting, with speaking so loud that Joyce would be able to hear them, as if it were a secret. As if he didn’t want her to know what Will had to say to him. “You just saved my life, Will. Are you okay?”
A wet laugh escaped Will’s lips. “I think I’m really tired.”
“Yeah.”, Mike faintly voiced back, as he watched Joyce collapse in front of them, frantically pulling Will away from him, and in her arms, touching him all over, looking for more injuries.
It felt like his heart was being ripped from him, again. Mike slowly shook his head. That was Will's mother. If someone had a right to take him from him, then it would be Joyce. Still, it didn’t change the frantic beating of his heart, and the faint pain that resurfaced again, pushing against his sternum. What was wrong with him?
“I think,” Joyce spoke, “he’s passed out.”
Mike took a look at Will’s form, and yeah, his eyes were closed, and he was much too limp to be conscious anymore. And then his eyes went to Joyce, who looked ready to collapse as well. There was a reason it had taken her this long to get to Will, when Vecna had thrown her against the car, she must have sustained some injuries herself.
Mike’s protective instincts kicked in.
“I’ll see if I can reach Erica.”, he said, decisively. “And then we’ll see what happened to Lucas, Robin, and Murray. Maybe they could bring the kids away fast enough.”
Joyce nodded, absent-mindedly, still holding on to Will as if he were her lifeline. Mike could understand that feeling too well.
They were the first ones to arrive at the Squawk
Once Mike had reached Erica over the Supercom, who had been rather hysterical about seeing Will's hands up in the air, murdering a Demorgorgon, they had decided to regroup at the radio station, for worse or wear.
Will had woken up sometime in the stolen military vehicle, with harsh breathing and shaking hands, and all Mike could do was wrap him up more in his jacket, and grip his own thigh so hard he was sure he left bruises in its wake.
He had always been incredibly bad at sorting out his feelings, one of the many reasons why it had taken him so long to say ‘I love you’ to El, why it was so hard to apologize and form into words what he was truly feeling, but one thing that had never been hard for him, was to care.
And oh, he cared so, so much. And seeing Will in pain, seeing Will so weak brought feelings up he hadn’t let himself feel since they were kids. When Will had been taken the first time, when no one had believed him that he was still alive, still stuck somewhere outside their world– he had felt oh so helpless. Alone, figuratively and literally, and El was the one who gave him hope again. It felt a little bit like this, again.
Will was so obviously not alright. And it had taken them a while, oh, it had taken Mike a while to get over his stupid, non-existent problems and just step up for once, apologize to Will for how stupid he had been acting for no apparent reason, other than being scared- and of what? The only thing that had been triggered in him for so long had been a fight-or-flight reflex, and Mike chose both, over and over again. Not the in-between. Not to stay.
But after, after it was just Crawls and calming down and the tiniest fraction of peace they were allowed to receive, things had changed. It had been easier to confide in Will again, it was easier to let himself care more than he had ever let himself before.
There still wasn’t an answer in his mind, why he had felt the need to pull away, especially looking at Will right now. That was his best friend. Something that would never, ever change. What had he been so scared of?
Losing him. Something whispered in the back of his mind. Losing him again.
It wasn’t all there was to it, certainly not. But it was enough for Mike, because just thinking about Will not making it out alive from the MAC-Z sent a dagger straight through his sternum.
“Come on, see if you can find something dry for both of you.” Joyce helped Will out of the car, who still seemed kind of out of it, but at least he was able to stand on his own. Still, he looked so lost, so empty, and Joyce could barely support him, maybe he should just swap places with her, maybe he should-
“Mike?”
He immediately shook the thought and gave a nod to Joyce, then headed in. He knew where Steve and Robin kept spare clothes, he could just use some of them. Neither of them would mind. Especially not Robin.
Mike shifted the lock off one of the cabinets, angrily sorting through walls of shirts and trousers. It’s not like it should bother him this much, Will’s closeness with Robin. They had all been through a lot, and there was surely a reason for Will feeling comfortable enough to confide in Robin, of all people.
It’s not like it was any different than Steve and Dustin.
But it was, wasn’t it? Not like Dustin had a crush on Steve. His hand tightened around one of the long-sleeve shirts he had pulled from Steve’s drawer. It was so weird. Robin was so much older than him, at least a year-
Shaking his head, he closed the cabinet with a bang. Stupid, stupid head and stupid, stupid thoughts-
He was blinded by headlights coming through the window. Instantly, he let the clothes fall and ran outside.
“You okay?” The engine hadn’t even been cut off, and Mike was already rounding the car towards the backseat, where he saw Lucas’ eyes peeking over the crushed window. Pretty bad choice of vehicle, but well…
“We’re good.” Lucas popped out of the car, wincing when his hand accidentally grabbed directly into the splinters of the once-been window. He accepted Mike’s one-arm hug and pulled him towards the house again.
“We need bandages for Murray, he’s been pretty out ever since Robin found me on the side of the road.” Mike threw a look over his shoulder and watched for a second as Erica helped Robin pull out a very dead-looking Murray. Robin shot him a quick wave that Mike couldn’t return. He couldn’t see any of the kids, either.
“Why are you still wet? Don’t tell me that’s blood.” Lucas stopped to touch his stomach through his shirt, but Mike only pushed them away, rolling his eyes. “We just came here, douchebag. When do you think I had time to change?” Then he sobered up a bit. “Wait, I do need to get these down to Will, do you think you’ll manage to search for bandages? I’ll come up in a second.”
Lucas threw him a look, but let go of his jacket. “How is he, anyway? Erica told us some really weird shit about him killing a Demogorgon with his bare hands? And we do in fact have a theory how this correlates with me and Robins’-”
“He’s okay.” Mike grabbed the clothes he had thrown across the floor moments prior. “We’ll talk later about everything, alright? When Murray is stable, and Will has dry clothes on.”
He didn’t catch the look Lucas threw him, incredulous but so knowing, while he descended the stairs.
Dim lights filtered through the basement, everything still lying around, papers strewn across the table and chairs. And in the middle of it all sat Will, Joyce hovering over him with a couple of blankets she had found, muttering something about a heater, somewhere.
But she could not have been there, and it would’ve felt all the same to Mike. His eyes immediately latched onto Will like a moth to a flame. It didn’t matter how much life had been sucked out of him throughout this whole process, through Vecna having such a grip over his mind, his every being. Will would always be the sun Mike sought out.
“I brought clothes.”, he smiled, startling Joyce, who almost let her blankets fall instead. “And the rest has arrived. I think Lucas is currently searching for something to fix up Murray.”
“What happened to Murray?” Joyce’s voice sounded through the room, alarmed. “Are the kids okay? Do they have anyone with them?”
Mike shook his head. “I didn’t have time to let Lucas explain anything, but there was no one in the car, besides Robin, Erica, and Murray.”
“The children got taken.”, Will spoke, and Mike felt his lungs contract. “Vecna showed it to me. All of them got taken to the Upside Down.” He looked so upset, so … angry, at himself, that Mike felt that dull pain again, over his heart.
Just like it has always been.
“Joyce, I got him,” Mike said it so decisively, so sure, that Joyce just nodded her head, and dumped a few of the blankets on Will's head. “You.” A stern finger shoved in Will’s direction. “Rest. I’ll see that the rest stays upstairs, but no trying to solve this mess alone again. We’ll sort this all out tomorrow. Not today.”
Will looked like he wanted to interject something, but just closed his mouth and nodded in defeat. Going head-to-head with Joyce Byers wasn’t a fight easily won, and if someone knew this firsthand, then it was Will.
She didn’t say anything to Mike, but her look said more than a thousand words. Watch him. Mike inclined his head. I always do.
And then she disappeared up the stairs, taking the unease with her too. Mike's shoulders slowly sank as he approached Will. The less distance he brought between them, the warmer he felt himself become. Maybe Joyce had really found a heater after all.
“I stole some of Steve and Robin’s clothes.” He handed Will a sweater that looked like it was definitely not from Robin's shelf, and started pulling his own jacket from his shoulders. It had dried a bit, but his skin was still damp under it, his shirt clinging to the little muscle he had started to put on over the summer.
“Don’t you want to go to the bathroom?” Will asked him, both eyebrows raised, the stack of clothes in his hands untouched.
“Why,” Mike spoke, already opening the fly of his pants. “It’s nothing we haven’t seen before. Just change, you must be cold enough already.” And Will shrugged his shoulders, and only then began Mike to realize what a stupid mistake that had been.
Will's skin looked smooth, softer than anything Mike had ever touched before. And his fingers itched to touch. Maybe wrap his hand around his biceps too, see for himself why the seam of his T-Shirt was stretched out around it, see if-
What the fuck is wrong with you?
A voice whispered frantically in his head, and immediately ripped him out of whatever visual his mind had decided to create for him. He turned around, away from Will as if he had been burned. He could find the sun beautiful. Didn’t mean it didn’t scorch him every once in a while.
“Are you done?” he finally said after fully dressing in something that probably belonged to Robin, judging by the button-up that was very clearly tailored for a small waist. He heard a few rustling sounds, and then Will’s quiet, “Yeah”, which eventually made him turn around.
Will wasn’t wearing anything special, just one of Steve's green overalls, but somehow it made him warm all over. It was a bit too long, but still thigh enough to see enough of- he stopped himself right there. Once was enough.
“You look…” Will started, eyes darting down to Mike’s torso. “...weirdly enough, really good in this.”
“Yeah?” Mike immediately preened. “I’m not sure if it's my style, but it would look good on Robin, wouldn’t it?” Oh my god, why would he say that? Why would he bring up Robin, when it was so obvious that-
“Sure,” Will said, nodding. It was probably the last thing Mike wanted to hear right now. This whole Robin and Will thing… Should he say something? Should he make Will aware of the fact that he could get anyone else? And not that he needed anyone else, he had Mike! His best friend. Shouldn’t that be enough?
“You do look better in it, though,” Will said it so fast, while already lying down on the couch, that Mike wasn’t sure he heard correctly.
When the words caught up with him, he felt blood rise to his cheeks.
“You really think so?”
“Mhm.” Will pulled one of the blankets over himself, cushioning his head with a pillow. “I’m really tired, Mike.”
“Oh!” Mike sprang up, looking for the light switch, turning the basement into a much darker space. “I’m sorry, I’ll be out of your hair, see if the others need anything-”
“Mike.” Will’s voice sounded small, quiet. Mike felt something in his chest unfurl. “Can you stay here? Just till I fall asleep,”
He caught the underlying meaning immediately. I’m scared. I don’t want to be alone.
“Of course.” Immediate, without question. Half fumbling, half remembering the layout, he pulled one of the blankets Joyce had left out from the floor, and lied down carefully in front of the couch. It felt so good to be needed, by Will of all people. The person he would choose every time over and over again, if he just as much as blinked.
“Thank you.”, whispered Will, and Mike had the sudden urge to hug him. He didn’t, but he grabbed Will’s hand that hung down from the side of the couch, and gave it a small squeeze. “Always.”
He wanted to let go, but something didn’t let him. Then Will squeezed his hand back, and he had to hide a blooming smile in his blanket, to not completely combust. Another wave of ‘What the fuck are you even doing?’ filled his mind, but this time he ignored it. He just held Will's hand tighter.
If there was even the slightest chance it would make Will feel a bit better, he would give his all for it.
“How long have you been out here?”
Mike pulled his head from his knees and gave Robin an incredulous look. “Maybe half an hour?”
“It’s way too cold out here for just a button-up.”, she gave him a look. “My button up.”
“Sorry.”, he said, while picking up a piece of grass, not feeling sorry at all. The sky had started to light up a bit, the moon slowly disappearing behind one of the many hills framing Hawkins. It almost felt idyllic. Aesthetic in a weird and deformed way, that only Hawkins could produce.
“I don’t mind,” Robin said, slowly letting herself sink next to him on the porch. Mike immediately felt irritated. Why would she choose to sit next to him? Why would she even go out here if she knew he was sitting out here? Didn’t she know he was Will’s friend? Didn’t she know he could never approve of them?
But then… he was acting rather irrational, all of a sudden. Ever since he had seen them together. Laughing, conspiring, whatever. Maybe he was just scared of losing Will again, the same foolish way he had almost lost Will before. And if it took him getting along with his crush, girlfriend, whatever, to keep Will as close to his heart as possible, he could make due.
Still, why had Will never talked to Mike about it? Why would he not make clear what was going on with Robin? Why would he not talk about this?
“Why are you sitting out here anyway?” Robin pulled him out of his thoughts. “I thought you were down in the basement, with Will?” Her voice took on a weird edge by the last words, after mentioning Will. Mike bristeled.
“Just worried,” he shifted his legs, staring absentmindedly up in the sky. “I couldn’t sleep much, either way.”
“I get that.” Robin hummed. “I would be scared shitless, too. I mean, with your parents? And the Upside Down, god.”
“Hmmh?” Mike looked at her, as if she had just said something really unclear. “The Upside Down?”
Robin looked at him, as if she was missing something really, really important. “I mean, yeah? Your sister is in there, isn’t she? And Dustin.” Then her look intensified. “And Eleven, of course.”
“Oh.” Right.
As bad as it sounded, over the last couple of hours, his only worry had been Will. He had defeated three demorgorgons on his own. What if he had just crashed? What if he passed out and no one was by his side? And Will was so strong, but he was so, so fragile, broke so heavily. If Mike could do one thing right in his life, then make sure Will never had to break again. He looked at Robin for the first time this night.
“I trust El to keep herself safe, and she has probably found Hopper, too. She’ll get to Holly in time, I just have to believe it.” His eyes found the disappearing moon again. “And Nance and Dustin are one of the smartest people I know. They’ll get out, I know that.”
Robin's brows furrowed, but she looked knowing. “So, you're worried about Will then?”
“Of course I am.” Mike bit out, harsher than he should have. “He’s been through so much, and now this? It’s amazing that he has powers, you should have seen him, he looked-” he shook his head, backtracking. “What I mean is, I’m so scared for him. What if this just makes him a much bigger target than he had already been before?”
Robin's eyes softened. “I understand you, Mike. I worry about him too.”
“Yeah, you better.” But then came another thought. She could never worry as much as Mike did. No one could.
It was quiet for a moment before Robin spoke again. Less sure of herself, less sure of what she actually wanted to share. “Mike… you do know that Will is not interested in me whatsoever?”
Mike’s head snapped up. “What?”
“And I’m very obviously not interested in him.”
Okay, what in the world was wrong with being interested in Will Byers? And if anything, Robin should count herself lucky, Will was interested in her of all people. But apparently he wasn’t, was he? “But what about the date?”
Robin just looked at him, as if he had lost his mind. “What date, Mike? Why in the world would I have a date with Will? He’s much too young for me!”
“As I’ve been saying,” Mike grumbled, but recovered rather quickly. “Like yesterday, you said something on the Squawk, about having a date today. And then you act all lovy-dovy with Will.”
“Oh,” Robin said, before she began laughing. It made Mike feel stupid. Like a joke had been told, and he was the last one to catch on. It didn’t really feel good at all.
“That was definitely not with Will.” Still smiling, then she sobered up. “Not that I could go on it anyway, with everything going on. And now I’ve stood her up two times in a row. What kind of girlfriend does this?”
Mike felt static buzzing through his head. “Her?”
For a second, Robin looked ready to bold. But then her shoulders relaxed, and she let out a tired sigh. “Yeah, with her. A girl.” She nudged Mike’s elbow, who was still sitting as still as a statue. “I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t go blabbing to anyone about it, Little Wheeler.”
It took a moment for Mike to pull himself out of whatever state he had been in. “Yeah… ‘course.”
Robin mustered him for a moment longer, but Mike was already staring somewhere else, wheels starting to turn inside his head. Something unfurling. Unwrapping like a Christmas present. Robin seemed to catch on, too. One corner of her mouth turned upward, as if she had come to a realization far quicker than Mike had, over the entirety of his childhood.
“Come in soon. You’ll catch a cold.” She threw one last smile over her shoulder and disappeared from Mike's viewfield. Once he was sure he was alone again, he pulled his knees towards his chest, hands shaking.
There was something existential happening to him, he was sure of it. He just couldn’t pinpoint what. Couldn’t name what that feeling was, grinding its teeth deep in his stomach, in his every being. It felt a lot like shame.
His head tilted against the house wall, when he started feeling little drops hit his face. Oh. It had started raining.
It felt more like an excuse to let the tears fall free from his tired, tired eyes.
A voice in his head, sounding awfully just like Will, whispered in his ear: It’ll be fine, Mike.
You’ll be just fine.