Chapter Text
Nick opened the iron door and was met with the cold air blowing in his fur.
"Judy!"
He was met with nothing but the wind blowing in the air. Where could she be? He was already worried as hell from before. Climbing up inside an old creepy wall to find his partner certainly wasn't helping his nerves calm down. Plus the ZPD could be on their way right now.
Just when Nick was about to turn back and search elsewhere, he was met with the same lynx from the party standing right behind him. The same one from the lodge that carried Judy away. Something didn't feel right with him this time around. He wasn't saying a word. The lynx started approaching him and Nick saw him slowly pull out something from behind his back. It looked like a weapon with two sharp edges pointing out. Nick's ears flattened at the back of his head. His stomach churned.
But his thoughts immediately went to one thing.
"Where is she?"
"She...she didn't make it." Pawbert said nonchalantly.
Nick's heart sunk in his chest, his eyes widened, and he skipped a breath in the cold air as the words that left Pawbert's mouth felt unreal. Judy was gone? That couldn't be true, what if the lynx is lying? He has to be! But what if it was true? No. He couldn't believe it. The idea of Judy being gone didn't sit well with him at all. It sounds absurd.
"But with snake bites, you go fast," The lynx was slowly approaching Nick with the poisonous weapon in his paw, "You'll see."
Nick's mind was racing from the adrenaline and shock. All he could do was back away from Pawbert, until he realized he was at the edge of an icy cliff. The snowy winds had blocked the view from when he entered the cliff beforehand! He was trapped. But Nick didn't care about being trapped. He needed to find Judy and figure out a way to save her. He just needed to get through Pawbert first.
But the lynx knew what Nick was thinking, and he immediately lunged at the fox and attempted to stab him with the venom device. Nick was tackled onto his back as Pawbert was now on top of him. The device had nearly missed him and struck into the ice next to Nick's head.
Nick was panicking. He struggled against Pawbert and tried to hold him with everything he had. He saw the lynx move the venom device in his hands and try to throw it down towards Nick's face. But Nick used all of his strength to hold back Pawbert's arm, with the device mere inches from his face.
Nick grunted and pushed his paw against the lynx's face in an attempt to push him off. But Pawbert swiped his paw at Nick's arm and knocked his paw off. Pawbert pushed his arm against Nick's neck to force him down.
"She's gone Nick," Pawbert said, aiming for Nick's chest as he kept trying to hold him back, "Just get it over with!" Nick didn't care what Pawbert had to say. He continued to fight back. His teeth were clenched and the side of his faced was pushed on the ice as his muscles burned to defend himself. He wouldn't give up. Not when Judy needed him!
He tried to kick Pawbert off with his free leg. But all he was hitting was the cold air until he felt a kick land on Pawbert's fanny pack which knocked some markers into the air as they fell down the long drop.
He couldn't fail Judy.
I, Nicholas Wilde, promise to be brave, loyal, helpful and trustworthy!
The memory of that night played in his head. Those words still rang true in his heart. That's right. He needed to be all of those things right now, for her. It was the least he could do. If he couldn't, then what kind of fox was he? No, what kind of partner was he? Especially after everything that's happened.
He's supposed to be an officer of the ZPD isn't he? He's responsible for the protection and safety of all mammals of Zootopia. The reptiles needed Judy to live. He needed Judy to live!
She had so much to live for. Her family, her career, for the snake, and all of the reptiles whose home and lives would be taken away. Unlike him, she actually cared about trying to help the world. All he ever did was try to run away for her safety. If anyone deserved to get out of this alive it was her!
But he knew things were getting worse. He felt his strength growing weaker by the second.
He opened his eyes and saw the device slowly inching towards him. Pawbert's intense face was the same as a killer's.
"You're done!" Pawbert growled, forcing down the device in an attempt to overpower Nick. The deadly weapon inching closer and closer. Fear was still present throughout his entire body. But the fox kept pushing back though. He wasn't going to quit!
"Know when to quit!"
Nick continued to struggle. Until he heard a voice echo from down below.
"ANTIVENOM!"
Nick looked down below and saw the blue viper that Judy had been pursuing.
"YOU CAN SAVE HER WITH THE ANTIVENOM!" he shouted. "THROW ME THE BAG!"
Nick could see the snake struggle against the ZPD officers against him as he was pulled back into the room. His body revealed an almost fading Judy, she was coiled safely with the snake, until she was dragged back in along with his body. She looked like she was out cold, almost like her life was slowly withering. It made Nick's heart sank even lower. The lynx had done this to her. Seeing Judy unconscious because of this lynx, stirred an animosity in Nick that he hasn't felt since he was eight years old.
"Judy!" Nick shouted.
What did the viper say? The bag. Pawbert's fanny pack! Nick looked at the bag and saw a snake themed pen sticking out. That must be it! He felt his heart rate speed up. There was still a chance. He could save his partner!
With the will to fight stronger than ever, Nick charged the strength in his legs and landed a hard kick on Pawbert's gut knocking him off. The fox wasted no time, and grabbed part of the fanny pack's belt. Unfortunately Pawbert had the same idea and grabbed the other half making both the fox and the lynx land on the ice.
Suddenly, cracks began to form. And the cliff arched downward as the ice continued to break. Both Nick and Pawbert started to slowly slide down towards the edge. Nick wasn't going to give up though. He continued to struggle against Pawbert in a tug of war for the fanny pack. But the pen had suddenly gotten thrown out of the bag amid the scuffle.
NO!
Panicking, Nick reacted quickly and tried to grab it midair. But he missed, and the pen started falling near the edge of the cliff where it thankfully stopped.
His heart skipped a beat. He stared at the antivenom pen. Nick realized what he had to do. He was scared. He wasn't sure if he would be able to do it. But Judy must be feeling scared right now. She was slowly dying down there. The thought of that brushed any fear Nick held inside. The cliff started breaking even more. The ice would break away soon if he didn't do something. He didn't have time to waste! Nick started crawling towards the edge.
Suddenly, he felt a paw grasp his arm, and looked over to see a terrified Pawbert.
"Leave it! You're gonna kill us both!" he pleaded. "It's not worth dying for!"
The words struck Nick like a rock. The same thing he told Judy in an attempt to get her to safety. But he knew the true meaning behind those words. They were a lie. He was being a coward with himself and to Judy back then. Not letting her know the real reason why he didn't want to continue the case. He felt ashamed seeing the bunny's reaction back then. The disbelief on her face. Like Nick had just trampled on everything she stood for. He was supposed to be her partner. To be there for her, but all he ever did was try and run away. Like he always did for his entire life. Just like what Pawbert wanted to do right now.
His mind flashed to seeing Judy's near lifeless body just mere seconds ago. He remembered this same feeling of stress. It was the same feeling when she was being taken away after they got separated from the lodge, and the loneliness he felt from being away from her after the terrible argument they had. He remembered the shame from seeing Judy's face when the carrot pen broke, it wouldn't have happened if he didn't act stupid and made her mad in the first place. He remembered the hurt he felt when Judy said that they might be different after all. Too many times he had failed her. But not this time.
I, Nicholas Wilde, promise to be brave, loyal, helpful, and trustworthy!
"You're wrong." Nick said with determination. "She's worth it!"
Nick used his legs to push himself down the ice as a slide. Breaking free from Pawbert's grasp in the process. He reached the pen and quickly got a grasp of it. He wasted no time in putting his last strength to good use, and chucked the pen towards the edge where he saw the door from where the snake was before, still open where it landed safely. He quickly saw a blue snake tail grasp it and pull it inside with him. A brief sense of relief stirred inside him.
But Nick yelped when he felt the edge tip lower towards the sea of snowy mist that led to a fifty-foot drop to his death.
He wasn't going to make it out of this alive. He had regrets. He wish he could've spoken to her one last time and apologized. He should've told her the truth about how she means so much to him. He regretted making fun of her ears back then at the Gala. He liked her ears. It wasn't fair to her that he joked about it, and that was all she might ever know now. He wanted to hear her velvety voice one last time. He wanted to see the bright smile on her face that she always wore, that never failed to make Nick's day brighter. He wished he could look into her beautifully striking purple eyes one last time.
But part of him didn't mind going out in this fashion. His life must've been so sad for him to be ok with dying like this. Leaving Judy behind in the end didn't sit right with him, especially after everything. He didn't want his last moments with her to be at the lodge. Nor did he want the last thing he ever saw of Judy was her slowly fading life.
But he finally saved her. The snake would give her the antivenom. She would be saved. He finally did some good for her and the city. Now she could continue to do great things for other people. For the snake, for Zootopia. She had a life worth living for. He only had her. Judy can do great things, the world needs her and her optimism and sense of justice. All he felt like he did for her was hold her back from doing that. Maybe she would be better off without him in the end. He didn't want to feel like a burden to her, but he felt like he had been.
No, don't let your last thoughts of her be like this Nick...
Even so, Nick loved each moment he had spent with her. He didn't regret any moment they shared, both the good and bad. It made him feel alive again and broke the grim chains that held him back for so long. She made him feel happy, sad, distressed, and valued. She gave him so much meaning in his lonely life in a short amount of time. The least he could do is give something back to her for everything she's done for him, and he was happy with that. Maybe that was enough to let her know how much he loved her.
Then came an awful crunching sound as the ice holding itself started to give away, and Nick felt himself and his whole body hang in the air.
Judy felt all her senses and consciousness come back all at once in a heartbeat. She jolted up with a big breath. It was as if the venom that was coursing through her body originally had just disappeared like it was nothing. It must've been the antivenom pen Pawbert had taken. But how did it get back to her? She quickly got up and remembered the last thing she focused on before fading away.
NICK!
She whipped her head towards the camera and saw Nick and Pawbert about to fall off the ice cliff. Any second now Nick would fall to his death.
Sirens went off in Judy's head. As if she had never been poisoned in the first place she raced to action. She quickly knocked out both the ZPD officers that were on top of Gary. The snake looked unharmed despite the tussle.
"You're okay!" Gary said happily.
"Gary hurry!" Judy shouted, "We have to help Nick-he's going to fall!"
She didn't even waste any time to see Gary's reaction. Judy quickly knocked the door to the control room open which knocked the ZPD officer outside of the room out. She ran like her life depended on it. She had to make it. She didn't care if she had to fight off any officer she saw. Nick needed her! She couldn't let him die after he saved her.
She raced up the stairs. She didn't look back to see if Gary was behind her. All she could do was just run with all the breath she had.
She felt her emotions start to well up. Nick had come back to her after everything. And now he was in danger because of her, and everything she had pursued.
She kept racing up. Why were there so many stairs! She was starting to worry she wouldn't make it in time. The last thing she remembered was Nick at the edge of the cliff about to break apart and get ready to fall. No, she couldn't think the worst right now. There was still a chance! She will save her partner!
Judy finally made it up the last flight of stairs and raced down the corridor leading to the door where Nick would be on the other side. She didn't know how she could deal with Pawbert up there, but she didn't care about that right now. Nick first, Pawbert later. She was almost there! She was finally at the door. To her happiness and surprise it was left unlocked, and with a shove from her body weight she managed to get it open.
But the sight before her almost made her lose all sense of hope she had. The ice had just broken with both Nick and Pawbert on it, and she saw both of them going down in the air.
"NICK!"
She ran towards the cliff. Judy wasn't thinking anymore, she didn't care anymore, all she could do was act. She jumped right after Nick off the cliff, and reached out to grab his paw.
She didn't even realize Gary had caught up and managed to coil his tail around her body to make sure she didn't fall to her death as well. But Nick wasn't holding onto her.
She had missed his paw.
The last thing she saw dangling in midair was Nick and Pawbert falling into the cold misty abyss with the fox's screams echoing into the air in her ears.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"
Judy had never shrieked like that before. She was quickly yanked up back onto the bridge by Gary. She landed harshly into the snow on top of the edge. She quickly got up and looked around, her heart pounding. She saw Gary a little farther from her. Probably from after using his reflexes and strength to lift her back up. But she looked back to where Nick had fallen. Her eyes widened.
She saw nothing.
Everything right now had felt numb. She knew what shock was from learning in the academy, but actually feeling it felt hollow. Her mind was still reeling from everything. She just sat on the cold snow on her knees breathing heavily. What had just happened? She missed, how could she miss? And Nick, he just fell down 50 feet. Nick just fell. Oh god Nick just fell!
Suddenly her breathing became more rapid. The barricade that her brain had built up just now was starting to tear down. Staring at the broken cliff with no Nick in sight suddenly made everything feel very real. The doe started to feel overwhelmed. Her stomach was starting to feel queasy. She felt her whole body shake, but it wasn't from the cold. It was like something just broke in her body. She didn't want to believe what had just happened.
"Judy!"
She felt the tough skin of a reptile's tail land on her shoulder. She saw Gary enter her view. He looked shocked too, but not frozen like she was.
"M-Maybe your partner survived the fall," Gary encouraged, "There's snow down there, maybe it was deep enough for him to survive the fall!"
Gary always had positive reinforcement despite the odds. It took her a while to process what the snake said. But she lightly nodded her head as she kept breathing in and out. "Don't lose hope Judy Hopps, we shall succeed!" Gary said with a hopeful smile. He knew she was scared and was trying his best to give her the push she needed. Judy finally snapped out of her stupor and rose up. "Y-yeah Gary, I'll go look!" She quickly got up and ran back inside with Gary behind her. The two went down a few flights of stairs.
"Oh that's right," Gary realized, "I'll go help his beaver friend, I'll meet you downstairs Judy Hopps!"
Gary went the other direction once the pathways split up. Once again she ran down with all the energy she had. But at this moment the shock from everything had worn off. Her heart didn't feel hollow anymore, it felt stressed. She felt uncertain as she raced down. Everything from before had felt like a blur now. All she could think of was Nick and the scream he let out as he fell. And the question she didn't want to think had popped into her mind.
What if this was it?
What if Nick had truly fallen to his death? What if watching him fall alone into the cold was the last thing she ever saw of her partner when he was still alive? What if the last memory she had of speaking with him was telling him that they we're different after all, and the pure shock on his face? The plan was to prove that they were innocent. Not this. Anything but this. While she ran she felt the emotions that had vanished from the shock begin to seep back into her heart and mind. Judy felt her anxiety start to rise. Her eyes felt like they were about to burn. All the determination she had to find her partner because of Gary's words, started to fade away. She began to think the worst.
The stairs were long. Longer than she remembered when she came up with Gary and that cursed lynx she had trusted. She felt like a fool, and now she learned the hard way while Nick paid the price. No, she had to find him. She hoped with all her heart that Nick was okay. She needed Nick to be okay. She didn't know what she would do if he wasn't.
I don't know what I'll do without him.
Finally, she reached the bottom. The door to the other side of the wall was easy to open. She noticed that the snowy blizzard from up top had stopped. The cold and quite peaceful snowy biome was what greeted her once she stepped outside. It felt like an insult for how worried she was for Nick's life.
And then she ran out into the cold. Her mind racing.
Please be okay.
"Nick!"
Judy called out but there was no response. She ran again into the direction where she thought Nick had fallen. Did she know where Nick had fallen? She didn't know, nor did she have time to think about it. All she could do was keep searching and calling.
Please just let him be okay.
"Nick!"
She did it again, and still nothing. She kept running around. Past all the pine trees and bushes that were covered in snow. Hoping for anything to show up. Just a simple sign was all she needed to know where the fox was and if he was ok.
Please don't let anything happen to him!
"NICK!!!"
Again, nothing. No grunt, no laugh, no painful sound, no breathing but her own, no snide remark could be heard. All she could hear was the quiet sound of the outside Tundra Town air. She couldn't find him. She felt her emotions begin to build up even more.
Please don't do this to me.
"NICK WHERE ARE YOU!"
All at once she was overwhelmed with the flurry emotions from before. The fear and uncertainty had started to seep in. Until they had transformed into sadness and despair. She felt the tears begin to escape from her eyes. Her breath became heavier. She didn't notice that her body began to shake again whenever she stopped to call out for Nick.
Please, please I need him to be okay!
"NICK PLEASE!!!"
She let it out with all her lungs could handle. But still nothing. She couldn't find him. Even if he wasn't alive she couldn't at least find his body amidst all the snow. He was lost. Almost as if he never existed in the first place. And soon any fight the doe had in her despite everything, had vanished.
She found herself wailing in the snow. Her body collapsed. All she could do was cry her eyes out. Her will to solve the case, to make the world a better place, all of it felt like nothing anymore. She fell to her side on the ground and curled up. Just letting all the tears spill out. She was sniveling and whimpering like a lost child now. Judy had never felt pain like this before. It was just too much for her to handle. She just wanted to shut down.
Without Nick there was no ZPD. Without Nick there was no Zootopia. Without Nick there was no home. He was her other half. He was the piece she felt was missing from her life for the longest time. He was the reason she still had her badge in the first place. He was the reason she learned more about herself, both the good and the bad. He was the first person to ever believe in her when no one else did. Her own parents had been thankful she was in meter maid duty. Her own boss wanted nothing to do with her despite her hard work. But Nick stood up for when no one else did, even when she began to lose hope in herself.
And now he was gone.
The memories hit the doe like a car. She let out another cry of pain as the tears kept coming. Her eyes hurt, her mouth felt dry, her whole body was tingling, and the strain on her heart felt like a mixture of hollowness and pain.
"Nick...N-Nick..." she wept, tears streaming down her face.
What was the point in anything now? She wanted to solve the case to keep her and Nick together, until she learned how bad reptiles had it. Why couldn't she realize that along the way she was leaving Nick behind? While he still kept at her side despite everything she put him through. Oh god, why did she expect him to apologize for saving her from the water pipe. She felt so ashamed back then, but was too deep in her own head and emotions to admit she had put both of them at risk of dying. No, she's been doing that the whole time ever since she convinced him to go to the Gala and "snoop around". She was the reason why both of them became fugitives when she hustled Nick into sneaking in without his knowledge. And then she left him behind at the lodge. She felt so stupid now for ever reaching out for Pawbert. And the whole time Nick was worried for HER. And how did she repay that? By ignoring his worries charging, foreword blindly into danger, and making things worse for both of them. All of this for the case. No, all because she was stubborn and insecure about people doubting her.
And Nick ended up paying the price for it, for everything. It should've been her not him. Nick didn't deserve this. It wasn't fair.
It's not worth dying for!
Nick's words started to ring true in her head. It wasn't worth him dying for, but he did. Even if she did manage to help Gary and clear the reptile's reputation and bring down the Lynxley's, none of it would feel right in the end. Not without Nick by her side. This felt like the press conference but ten times worse. Except now, she had lost Nick for good this time. And it's because of her actions once again.
She cried out into the snow. Her eyes beginning to hurt from the tears pouring out.
"H-How could I d-do this to h-him?" she sobbed.
She felt guilty for letting her own feelings and pride get in the way of her and Nick.
The regrets made her whimper even more. But then all the memories of Nick came flooding in.
She would never hear his snarky remarks ever again followed by his signature smirk. She sniffled.
I'd rather chew off my own arm!
She would never hear his dumb inopportune jokes anymore with his goofy smile that told her he was proud of that quip. She let out a sob.
A vindow viper ahhhh!
She would never hear the concern and sweetness in his voice once more with genuine fear in his eyes. She whimpered and curled up even harder.
A-Are you ok?
She would never hear him call her "Carrots" ever again. She breathed hard.
Don't worry Carrots, I'll let you erase it. In forty-eight hours.
She could never hear him call out her name again. She hit her fist the ground and groaned.
Judy!
The last time she heard that was back at the lodge. When Nick appeared when the structure was being torn apart to call out her name once more. When she sped up away from him to go up the mountain after the pen broke. Oh god. The pen is gone forever now. She let out another sob when she remembered that the item that symbolized them was gone and broken forever.
And that's how Judy felt right now. She was broken, because without Nick she could never feel complete. Nick sacrificed himself for her, and now she could never return the favor. Judy felt guilt, shame, regret, and sadness all in one. And that created a lamenting bunny lying on her side in the snow crying her eyes out, until she internally begged just to fall asleep so she could escape this awful reality.
"Nick...N-Nick...I-I'm sorry!"
She's never felt this type of pain in her heart before. It was overwhelming and torturous. She felt alone and cold as the tears kept spilling out with no signs of stopping anytime soon.
"Please! I-I need you..."
She wanted Nick. She wished he would come back. She wanted to see him again. She needed him to be here. She wanted to see her fox come back to her.
She didn't know if it was her brain turned to mush from all the crying, but suddenly she heard a tree shake and was followed by a loud thud from behind to her.
"Augh!"
Her ears perked up. That voice. She knew that grunt from anywhere. She slowly rose from her spot in the snow and was on her knees, tears still falling down from her fuzzy face. It couldn't be? Could it?
She turned her head and her puffy eyes looked right behind her towards the nearest pine tree. She saw a familiar pink button up shirt with an all too familiar tie. The orange fur on him was no mistaking it. He was in the snow with a pile of broken tree branches surrounding him.
"Ahh!" he groaned, "Damn that hurt."
The fox was crouched as he brushed some wood chips and snow off of him. He had a few bruises on his arm that he felt. He winced when he felt his back sting a little bit. Hopefully that wouldn't hurt in the morning. And damn that old bag of bones Milton had scratched hell out of his paw back there. He hated those damn cats. The cold definitely didn't help it feel any better. Hopefully that doesn't leave a scar.
But he survived.
Holy crap I survived! But if I survived...then that means!
It was only when he turned his body around to finally notice that Judy was just a few feet away from him. Their eyes met and it seemed like time had come to a stop. Nick's ears went to the back of his head upon seeing her. She saw his emerald eyes. He saw her purple ones that were coated in red from crying. They only stared at each other for about eight seconds. They both were out of breath. Their eyes wide in awe like they were staring at a ghost. Judy felt some feeling in her body return again.
She's alive.
He's alive.
On instinct they both got up and scampered towards each other nearly stumbling on through the snow. Nick winced a little when his body ached from the bruises, but he didn't care. None of it was enough to stop them from finally getting to each other. And soon the fox and bunny quickly embraced each other into a tight hug still panting heavily.
"I thought...He told me that you...that you were..."
"I was trying t-to get to you...and saw you..."
They both breathed out jumbled words. Before just letting themselves settle into the hug. The thought of what just happened processed in their heads. They almost died. They almost never got to see each other again. And then she heard it. The sound of Nick's beating heart in her ear as the side of her head was pressed against his chest. It was proof that her mind wasn't playing games with her. Proof that her Nick was alive and holding her in his arms.
This made Judy be the first one to break down. She started weeping into the fox's shirt. Nick could feel Judy grip his body harder and tighten the hug. Almost like she was afraid he would go away again.
Nick's shock wore off when he heard Judy spill out her tears. Her sobs muffled into his chest. He tightened the hug back. Holding her reassured him that she was finally safe from harm. He did it. He managed to protect her and stopped the risk of her being taken away from him. For the first time in twenty-three years Nick Wilde cried. The tears spilt out of him as well. The fox sobbed and blubbered with the bunny. He wrapped his tail around her body on instinct.
They were both here and safe. Reunited at last. The two unsure if they would ever see each other again after the lodge. But right now none of that felt like it mattered. They both just wanted to cry together and embrace each other.
The two partners let themselves cry and hugged for a few minutes. They both deserved this after everything, nothing else mattered anymore right now. All the mistakes they made were null and void right now. They were both just so happy to see each other.
Nick felt Judy lightly try and push away from his stomach and releasing the protective coil from his tail. She looked up but kept holding onto his arms. Her eyes bloodshot from so many tears.
"I'm sorry!" she squeaked, "I was a terrible partner to you. A-and I hurt you again! I-I almost left you at the lodge with the ZPD! A-And I almost got us killed Nick! I-I'm sorry about the p-p-pen Nick! The pen! And t-then I said were d-different when that's not t-"
"Judy!" Nick raised his voice to snap Judy out of her rambling. She didn't even realize she was talking so fast and letting out everything all at once. She let go of Nick's arms and let him keep his paws on her shoulder.
Judy looked into his eyes. She's been so used to seeing the composed look in them, but something felt different about his look. Vulnerable and uncertain. The glow in his green eyes have only appeared scarcely before. She had only seen this twice before. Back at the gondola when he finally opened up to her about the Junior Ranger Scouts but back then he retreated behind his mask. She saw it the day he graduated from the academy, but that glow was different. It was pride and happiness when she looked up after pinning that badge on him. She knew what she saw back then, and now she knew what she saw in this very moment.
The real Nick Wilde.
And the real Nick Wilde took a deep breath and exhaled.
"Okay...I don't-I don't care that we're different," Nick began letting Judy go. "Y'know I-What I care about...is you!" Nick had trouble finding words to let everything out. "I care about you...okay. And I didn't say it, but I should've said it. But I didn't...because, umm," he let out an awkward chuckle, "Well, 'cause I am...an emotionally insecure source of your discomfort who's not good at expressing his feelings." He was nervous. "Probably because I've been on my own my whole life. It's not an excuse, it's just," he grabbed the back of his neck and took a quick breath. Like he was summoning the courage to say what he felt. "It's why instead of telling you that you're the best thing that ever happened to me, I-I make jokes...about your ears a-and I tell you you try to hard, when you know the truth is I just don't want you to get hurt, because..." he breathed in and out, "Because no one else in the world matters more to me than you do."
Judy was left speechless. She's never heard these types of feelings expressed towards her before. It made her feel happy inside. Her heart skipped a beat. A smile almost formed on her face when she felt her heart feel like the life was being brought back into it by Nick's words. She felt overwhelmed a little by it too, but it felt good this time. She thought she had all her tears dried up, but there were more starting to swell up in her eyes. She did her best to hold it in as her mouth quivered until the words began to break free from her as well.
"I-I do try too hard because d-deep down I'm a-afraid-"
Nick must've realized she was shaking too much from everything, because he put a reassuring paw on her shoulder and gave her a sympathetic look. Almost as if to say "it's okay". She didn't know how fast she was talking before until Nick's touch calmed her down a bit. She sniffled a little to control herself and her thoughts.
"I'm afraid I am what everyone thinks I am, and I suppress my discomfort because...I'm worried it will make me look weak and I want to be strong." Her lips trembled again. "And...I think I'm failing all the time a-and then that makes me feel like I'm failing you too." She breathed in and out again. "And I h-hate it when people question or doubt what we have because I love what we have, because you're the most amazing mammal I ever got to know in my life. And I only take what you say personally, b-because you're the only one in my life who ever believed in me, even when I don't believe in myself." Another deep breath. "And I should've told you that." She paused to hold back her tears. "Y-you make my day brighter whenever I'm with you, because no one else matters to me more than you do, either."
Her tears were spilling out, but she kept her composure. But Nick, with tears also still in his eyes, breathed a heavy sigh and felt a smile creep up on his face. He didn't think he would be this important to her. A former hustler who tried to play it cool all the time but was really living a sad life before he met her. Someone like him was important to someone as amazing as her. He felt special. He felt touched. Damn this bunny could only do this to him.
"I have unresolved childhood trauma that I refuse to discuss because being vulnerable scares me," Nick blurted out. "And I'm worried the real me might scare you off because I cherish what we have too."
"I make dangerous choices because I have an unhealthy bunny hero complex." Judy reciprocated.
"And I didn't join the ZPD because I wanted to be a cop, I joined because I always wanted to be part of a pack. And the thought of losing you or being separated scares me because...because you're my pack. If I lost you then I would just be...empty again like I was before we met. And that's why I would do anything to protect you and be there for you no matter what happens or where you go." Nick tenderly said.
Judy almost broke down again hearing that, but she needed to calm herself.
"I-I should never have left you...and I do need a herd of therapy animals. And I should have told you that you're the only partner I would ever want, because...you're my fluffle. I always feel at ease when I'm near you, because I don't feel alone anymore. And without you I-I'd feel like part of me would be missing because you are my other half Nick." She managed to choke out.
Nick didn't know what "fluffle" meant but that didn't matter. Because he couldn't hold in the tears anymore again. He sobbed and rushed in for another hug with Judy. She gladly returned the embrace and started to join in the crying. All he wanted to do was hold her. He was so happy to see that she was ok. He was happy to hear everything she said. Nick didn't think he would ever experience this kind of affection from anyone or have any affection at all. At one point he accepted that his life would never have a happy ending.
Until his bunny came along, and changed his entire world.
My bunny. Nick felt his heart leap and he lightly nuzzled the top of her head with his chin.
Judy just enjoyed the hug and quietly sniffled. Nick's body was warm when he hugged. She could feel his soft fur tenderly rub against her head. It was nice. She liked hugging him. She wanted to do it more often. His arms wrapped around her back made her feel...safe. She's never felt distressed before at all. But Nick's presence always managed to make her feel safe and wanted. She finally breathed a sigh of relief and smiled, as all her anxiety, fear, and worries have now been washed away. She was calm again. She felt like herself again. All she wanted to do now was hug him longer. To enjoy the moment for as long as they could. Just her and her fox.
My fox. Judy felt her heart leap. She buried her head deeper into his shirt.
For just a few seconds the two held each other a little longer. Before it was Nick's turn to break the hug, which irked Judy a little for how much she was enjoying it.
"Carrots you were right back then." he began.
Judy gave a puzzled look. Right about what? Nick took a moment to catch his emotions and breathed out.
"The world will never be a better place, if no one is brave enough to do the right thing."
Oh that's right. She remembered now. Back at the lodge.
"Judy I may not have joined the ZPD to be a cop like you did...but I still took an oath. Not just to the city, but to you as well. It's my sworn duty to protect mammals that need it most. And right now that snake, all of Marsh Market, and every reptile needs us to stop the Lynxley's." He hardened his look, now full of purpose. "T-They're about to lose everything they have left here, and that's not right of me to just ignore it when I can do something for once. I was just afraid back then, for you especially. But I was wrong to just keep dismissing the case when we were together. I should've been lifting you up and supporting you. Not being insensitive and trying to run away. Because you taught me that running away doesn't solve anything. And If I try to avoid all of this and ignore what's about to happen then that makes me no better than those rich cats. It makes me no better than the Nick from the past. So I'm with you, to face this head on and solve the case. Hopps and Wilde don't run away after all right?"
The smile that came from the tod, combined with a mix of resoluteness and kindness in his eyes stirred something inside Judy. Her heart was thumping, but not from anything negative. No, this time it felt...comforting, warm, and a little bit nervous too though. She's never seen Nick look so...determined before.
Her body moved without command, and she lightly tugged at Nick's tie, gesturing him to crouch down to her level. The confused fox did just that and before he knew it he felt the palms of the bunny on his face holding each side of his cheek. Judy felt the softness of his fur, and it strangely brought relief to her heart despite knowing he was okay.
He's okay Judy. He's still here with you.
"I'm sorry for putting us in danger Nick. You were right too. If I keep diving in head first to everything then I'll just get myself or you killed. And it wasn't right of me to make decisions without talking with you first." She looked up at him, and she felt him put one paw on her back. "I'm sorry for back at the water tube. I knew I was wrong back then, but I was too stubborn to admit it. You saved my life Nick. Heck, you've saved me twice! Thank you."
The doe smiled at him.
"And along the way I pushed back what made this case so important in the first place...us. Cripes, I still want to help Gary and every reptile left in the city. But not without you by my side. Wilde and Hopps should stick together."
Judy's words were sweet. It made Nick's heart ache like it was filled with butterflies. He now discovered he liked it when Judy hugged him or when she's holding him like this. Like he's something delicate she wants to handle with care. He didn't know what he was doing when he used his paw to cover Judy's on the left side of his cheek.
"I'm so glad you're ok," Nick murmured, "I thought I lost you..."
Suddenly, the memory of missing the catch for Nick replayed in her head once he uttered those words. The flashback to only swiping the cold air instead of Nick's warm paw had her heart in turmoil again. Then hearing his screaming and watching him disappear into the cold wind was stirring up her emotions again.
Geez how many times is she gonna feel like this. She hated herself for missing him. The guilt was eating her up. Nick had saved her life, and she couldn't even make it in time to save his. If he didn't land in those trees by sheer luck then...
Judy winced and closed her eyes. She almost started to feel her eyes burn again, but her breathing was increasing. She was beginning to feel overwhelmed again. Nick seemed to realize this, and lightly tightened his paw over hers.
"H-hey Judy, what's wrong? Are you okay?" he pleaded with a soft tone, his eyes widening in concern with his ears flat.
The rabbit attempted to control herself. But Nick's words had broken down the tough complex she always tried to appear as. She opened her eyes again, and saw the warmth and concern in his green ones. She liked his eyes.
"You a-almost died after saving me. And I couldn't even save you Nick," she whined. Cripes she really was a blubbering mess right now. "I missed you when you were falling! I-I'm sorry Nick I failed to save you when you needed me!"
The fox shut off her words when he let go of her paw and pulled her in for another hug. Judy was frozen for a few seconds before she knew that Nick was embracing her again. She wanted to feel him in pressed against her badly. Instinctively she wrapped her hands around his back. She shivered a little bit when Nick rubbed her back gently. He was trying his best to calm the bunny. It broke his heart to see her so distressed. He wanted to see that bright smile that he loved so much return. But he knew that she went through a lot back there. So all he could do was try his best to comfort her.
He contemplated for a bit. Deciding whether to keep the confessions coming or to let her just enjoy the feeling of the hug. No, that's not right. He shouldn't hold back and settle again. Not after everything that just happened, when he thought she was gone forever. She deserves to know what's in his heart. If something like this happened again, surely he would regret not telling her then.
"Judy you HAVE saved me." he whispered in her ear. The fox pulled back from the hug which startled her for a bit. She didn't want to let go. But Nick knew that and made sure to keep his paws on her. He made sure his face was softened, and carried a weight of reassurance.
"Judy, you saved me from myself back then. When I didn't believe in myself or the city. I was committed to the idea of just giving up and proving the stereotype that everyone saw me as. Another lowlife shifty fox who could only run petty street hustles to make his life work. I had...given up, and for the longest time I tried to act like I was okay with it. But then you well...hopped into my life." He said with a chuckle.
She couldn't help but chuckle in return to his quip.
"Judy, when you gave me that application I was happy, but also scared. Because you are the only mammal who gave me a chance and believed in me when I gave up. You gave me a purpose Fuff! And when you came back to me after months from the press conference...I-I wanted to forgive you so bad. B-Because I missed you. I missed the feeling you brought back into me. And when you apologized that's when I knew what I wanted to do. To be by your side and live up to what you saw in me."
He gently rubbed her shoulder with one of his finger pads. "You don't see it, but you managed to undo what the city had done to me for years in just two days. You pulled me out of my rut and saved me from myself. And you don't give yourself enough credit Judy. You touch lives and bring people together. You're my hero, Fluff."
A heavy silence withheld Judy as she stood there speechless. She's considered Nick her best friend for a good while. But this made her feel different. No, everything he has said rocked her to her core. This felt too intimate, too personal to just feel like friendship to her. This didn't feel the same as when she lied there half conscious to Gary's words of thankfulness. All of Nick's words these past few minutes felt...indebted...intimate. Like he would only say this to her and her alone. Never has another mammal, especially a fox, or even her own family, admitted to this type of closeness to her. It bubbled up inside to where another whimper escaped her when she tried to smile.
And his touch has never felt so comforting before...
"Nick..."
She knew what she was feeling. She started feeling slight traces of it when she woke up separated from him. From when she saw him alive and heard his grunt after falling. When she was racing up the wall with everything she had. Why she felt so overwhelmed when she was spilling her guts out to him. Why she felt comfortable when it was him and only him that she finally admitted that she feels weak sometimes.
"And...and that's... that's why I-I love you. Okay I-I love you Judy!" Nick sputtered out.
His words didn't register because she was already leaning forward when he finished talking. Her small lips met his. And she ended up giving him a quick peck on his snout before the realization of what the fox said had hit her.
She retreated for a bit to slow her heart rate. She could feel her cheeks burning up inside.
She just kissed him after he said he loved her. She kissed him. She kissed her best friend. She had her FIRST kiss with her fox best friend.
Sweet cheese and crackers-did I rush into things again???
Nick was shaking at first, but the quick kiss had him frozen. His didn't see that his tail was puffed up. All he felt was his mind racing, his heart beating, and his body heat rising. His blush was hidden underneath his red fur. He just confessed and she kissed him.
She really kissed me?!
They were both breathing heavily and staring at each other. The awkward silence held them both for a while. Before Judy took a deep breath.
"N-Nick I love you too!" she said quickly.
Before Nick knew it her lips clashed with his once more. But this time Nick felt her little bunny tongue enter his mouth. He couldn't help but close his eyes and lean into her when his heart was still on fire. His long canine tongue touched her small one back, letting her take the lead. And the two lightly danced with their tongues together.
It was tender. The two just relished in their taste. In the softness of their lips. The closeness and warmth they felt for each other. In the new feelings that just emerged and were now blossoming.
Eventually they separated. Quickly catching their breaths. It was back to staring at each other and blushing madly.
Nick contemplated for a second.
He wrapped his hands around Judy's back and pulled her in for another tender kiss. The doe gladly accepted. The two were once again locking lips. She put her hands on the back of his head and rubbed him there. His big paws lightly scratched at her back which sent shivers to the doe. Nick's tail was on fire, waving back and forth. This time Nick's tongue had invaded her mouth. Judy found herself a little overwhelmed with the abundance of fox tongue but gradually got into the feeling. She loved it. He loved it. They loved kissing each other. It felt right.
"Now that is what we call an overshare!"
In an instant the partners were off each other and let out a yelp when they heard the sudden voice of an all too familiar beaver. With Nick landing on his rump in the snow, and Judy nearly tripping backwards.
"N-Nibbles!" Nick choked out. His heart was pounding.
The beaver stood before the two flustered mammals with a hardy grin on her face that made her big buckteeth stick out better than ever. But wrapped around her body was Gary with his neck and head sticking out midair. It gave a funny shape to the two animals combined.
"Yep I'm alive Nicholas!"
"We're so glad you're alive, Judy's friend!" Gary joyfully said.
Nick wasn't even remotely unsettled by Gary. He was too embarrassed, and his mind too jumbled on the kiss he just shared with Judy.
The bunny meanwhile was as solid as a statue. But her poker face failed to cover up the red in her ears.
Their expressions and body language made them both look like they were kids who got caught by their moms from taking a cookie from the jar.
"Gotta say, I've always wanted to be friends with a snake someday, and THIS GUY was a great first impression!" Nibbles said, giving Gary's body a little pat.
"Thanks again for letting me share your warmth Nibbles Maplestick! I couldn't survive out here in the cold."
"Welp, anything for the serpent that saved my darn life!"
"It feels so good to have new friends!"
"H-how long were you two standing there?" Judy interrupted.
Nibbles chuckled. "Just enough to see that paradise has gotten a little brighter for you two. But if you two wanna continue...all of that, then be my guest."
Judy felt like her ears were gonna fall off when she tried to cover the blush on her face and look away.
"Nibbles!" Nick cried.
"Listen I would love to see where this all goes, but THAT guys still alive!" Nibbles pointed towards the snow cottage in the distance to their right.
No way. It was Pawbert! And he had just stolen a snowmobile and was heading for his family's manor in the far distance.
Judy managed to snap out of her embarrassed state when she remembered what was at stake. How on earth did he survive the fall? Did he land in a tree like Nick did? None of that mattered now though. "He's gonna get to the lost reptile neighborhood, find Gary's great-grandma's patent, and destroy it!"
Nick knew that whatever he and Judy just shared would have to be on hold at the moment. Now it was time to do his duty!
"Okay, I don't know what that means or who Gary is, BUT LETS GO!"
The fox's new motivational energy was contagious to Judy and she felt her spirits begin to rise as well. She wished that she and Nick got to talk more about the barrier the two had just broken in their relationship.
Nick's newfound vibe was on high when he was the first to take off towards the cottage where the snowmobiles were. Judy wasted no time in following him, with Gary and Nibbles right behind them.
She managed to catch up to her foxy companion with ease. She cared about the case and stopping Pawbert no doubt, but she didn't want to push her partner to the wayside again. She matched the fox's pace. Nick meanwhile knew he was on high from everything. Probably why his bruises weren't inflicting pain as he ran. And his back didn't hurt too bad either.
"Hey Nick-"
He looked beside him and saw his partner run next to him at the same pace.
"Don't worry Fluff, we're gonna catch that guy and find that patent or whatever its called!" he said with a smile.
Judy huffed as she ran. "Its not that! When this is all over I wanna talk more, about everything okay!"
Nick saw the reassuring smile on her face. Its like it said she wouldn't forget him and she wanted him to know that. Nick smirked back at her. Whatever the kind of talk she wanted to have about them was just as important to her as it was to him.
"You got it Carrots!"
I'll wait for you when you're ready Judy.
With newfound determination between the two partners they arrived at the cottage and jumped into the nearest snowmobile.
"Hopps and Wilde?" Nick said playfully with a smirk.
"Wilde and Hopps!" Judy replied with a fiery tone and the grin that Nick loved to see.
"And Nibbles and Gary!" The beaver and snake said in unison as soon as they jumped aboard with them.
"He's Gary-WOAH"
Nick held on to Judy as the group took off. Ready to take down Pawbert and his family once and for all.