Chapter Text
As soon as Hyunjin woke up, he knew it was gonna be a bad day. The familiar buzzing behind his left eye and the tightness in his neck.
Shit. He thought. Migraine. It wasn’t always that he woke up with the migraine, but one the days where it didn’t sneak attack him in the middle of the day, he knew he was gonna be in for a long one.
The rest of the members knew about his migraines, along with his other health issues. It’s somewhat unavoidable after 6 years of not just knowing each other, but practically living on top of each other. He still feels guilt creep up his chest every now and then when if thinks what he put the rest of them through for the first few years. Hyunjin tried not to think about that though, and reached for the orange pill bottle next to his bed. It was probably already too late for his medication to actually do anything, but it was worth a shot. He slightly gagged at the feeling of the chalky pill on his tongue, but managed to swallow it down. Him already being nauseous was not a promising sign.
He squinted as he looked at his phone to check the time. 7:15. He had two more hours until he and the rest of the boys needed to leave for their schedules but he could already hear some of the boys up and moving about. Most likely Minho or Seungmin at this hour. He sent a text to Chan, despite the fact that he knew he was still asleep.
Migraine. Took meds. Won’t be up until last minute. The bright light felt like an ice pick stabbing into his left eye and he felt almost carsick as his eyes tried to focus over the keyboard to type it out. He hit send and took a few deep breaths before reaching into his side drawer and pulling out the nausea meds, letting one dissolve under his tongue.
He closed his eyes and covered his face with the blanket Felix had left next to him the night before. He had a hard day yesterday and by the time they all got home, Felix had attached himself to Hyunjin. The freckled boy couldn’t explain what he was feeling, unable to expand beyond “I just want to be close to you” and that something just “felt off”. Hyunjin didn’t mind of course, besides the fact that the bed just gets so hot with two people in it. But if it made Felix feel better, then who was he to deny him?
Hyunjin drifted in and out of a semi restful sleep for the better half of the next two hours, until Chan rolled out of bed and saw Hyunjin text message. He felt his heart squeeze a bit as he sighed. He hated to see any of his members in pain, which was unfortunate considering the multiple members with chronic conditions. Chan has long since forgotten how to tell the difference between the feeling of guilt, and the feelings of sympathy. For Chan, both those feelings were also synonymous with love.
There is nothing Chan hates more than feeling helpless, and not many other words describe the feeling of watching Jeongin’s body tense and shake as he seized, or as he held Hyunjin’s his hair back when he threw up from the migraines. Or the way he sees Minho’s watch flash as his heart rate hits past 140 during a POTS flare up. And just the same way he feels as he tries to ground Jisung as during an anxiety attack. But right now wasn’t the time to think about all that, they had shit to do and Chan has a team to lead.
He rubbed his face with his hands and stood up. He walked into bathroom and washed his face and brushed his teeth. His hair was a mess, curly and frizzy. He wet it with a comb and called it a day. After washing up, he walked into the kitchen. He saw the maknae, already dressed and eating a light breakfast. He went over and pulled him into a back hug.
“EW! Hyuuunnng put a shirt on!” Jeongin whined and squirmed in his arms.
“Good morning Innie!” He giggled as he messed up his hair. The younger groans in protest but doesn’t say much more, going back on his phone and eating his fruit. Chan sees Minho doing the dishes and walks over to him. Minho was already shifting his weight between his legs rapidly and leaning his torso against the sink more than a regular person would.
“I’ll finish those. We have a long day ahead of us.” Minho looks at Chan and narrows his eyes but doesn’t protest. He puts down the pan he’s holding and he washes his hands. He turns from the sink and holds his hands out. Chan raises an eyebrow at him but before he can even ask, Minho has already wiped his dripping hands on Chans arm.
“Yah! Ugh don’t wipe your hands— Minho cuts him off,
“Don’t worry, I just washed them.” His voice was mockingly sweet as he disappeared to his bedroom. Footsteps and voices come through the kitchen as Jisung and Seungmin come to make their iced coffees.
“He meant to say thank you.” Jisung holds back a laugh.
“Thanks for the translation.” Chan rolls his eyes but with no real malice.
By the time he finishes the dishes, everyone is up except Hyunjin. Chan puts a plain black shirt on and knocks on the room where Hyunjin is asleep. He hears a mumble and walks into the room. There’s a set of clothes on the foot of his bed with a sticky note on top with carefully scribbled Hangul.
“Jinnie?” He puts his hand on Hyunjin’s arm and rubs it. “We gotta leave in 10 mins. It looks like Felix put out an outfit for you.” Chan knew Hyunjin was awake by the squeezing of his eyes and the stiff way he rolled over.
“Mmh.” He sniffed and sighed. Chan helped him to sit up. “M’ fine Hyung. I’m up.” Chan nods and stands up, walking to the door.
“I’ll umm… be in the kitchen. Let me know if you need anything.” And with that, he walked back to the kitchen. Felix was the first one to look up at Chan.
“Is Hyunjin ok hyung?”
“He’s ok, his head hurts. Just try to keep the volume down in the car today. Ok everyone?”
“Migraine.” Minho corrects.
“What?” Chan asks.
“His head doesn’t just hurt. He has a migraine, hyung. Call it what it is.” Minho doesn’t even look up from his phone.
“Oh I didn’t mean that it—“Chan stutters
“I know what you meant.” Minho gets up and goes to knock on Hyunjin’s door again. “Hyunjin. We’re about to leave. Bring your sleeping mask and earplugs. You can sleep in the car.” Chan just takes a deep breath, trying to prepare himself for the shit show he can already feel is to come.
The car ride was somewhat smooth. Hyunjin wasn’t able to fall back to sleep but it was quiet and dark enough for him to not have the constant searing pain he was expecting. The constant movement did not help his nausea however, but he’d take that over the pain. He can hear the others talking about him but he can’t make out what they’re saying, only bits and pieces. He can’t believe they have a full schedule the day before tour. The van parks and he hears the sound of the boys unbuckling. He takes off his eye mask and squints as he tries to adjust to the light. His left side flashes in pain when he tried to open them anymore.
“Hyunjin? You ok?” Chan’s worried voice rings out, and Hyunjin hates it. He tries to smile a bit, thinking maybe if everyone else thought he was ok, he could convince himself.
“Mh. Just tired. Ready to go in?”
Chan wasn’t buying it though, he’s always been too perceptive for his own good.
“Okay” His hand goes to rub the back of his own neck. “just tell me if you need anything”
“I’m fine Hyung.” He feels something plastic hit his hands and looks down. Minho is holding out his sunglasses for him. He smiles and steps out.
The two walk together a bit behind the others but still in front of Chan who was way back with a manager.
“Do I really look that bad?” He quietly asks Minho as he puts on the sunglasses.
“Probably not to the normies.” Minho replies. As much as it was hard to see fellow members suffer from health issues, it was nice knowing that at least Minho and Jeongin could relate. It felt nice to have connection rather than just sympathy sometimes.
“Right. Just to the freaks.” Hyunjin sighed.
“You know what they say, better to get your freak on, than freak out” Minho smirks. Hyunjin cringes, “Gross Hyung.”
From behind them, Seungmin and Jisung catch up with Hyunjin and Minho. They’re both sipping on their iced americanos and Minho is suddenly envious of their ability to drink caffeine like that and not feel like they’re dying. They can all hear Chan triple checking that Jeongin took his medication.
“He must be stressed. He’s been on Jeongin’s ass lately about everything” Seungmin says.
“I think the other day really freaked him out. I’m sure he really wants to make sure he has everything he needs for the tour.”
A few days prior, Jeongin had a sudden seizure in the kitchen and nearly hit his head on the counter. Partial and absence seizures aren’t anything new to the boys, but it’s been a few years since they’ve seen Jeongin have a full on tonic clinic. Even back when they were a more common occurrence, he was able to warn them. Didn’t help that Minho nearly passed out from getting up too fast after seeing Jeongin go down. Safe to say, it led to an increase in Jeongin’s meds, as well as Chan’s blood pressure.
Once they finally make it to the venue for the shoot, they have an hour of down time.
“Okay it’s quiet time for everyone,” Chan announces as he walks into the room. “And for you uhh…” he begins to point to Hyunjin, Minho and Jeongin. “afflicted ones,” He trails off.
“What a nice way to say tortured.” Minho says dryly as he is already laying down on a floor mat on the ground.
“I want you to try and sleep. Get some actual rest.” Chan ignores Minho’s comment. Hyunjin debates snapping back saying that sleep doesn’t guarantee rest. He could go to sleep for hours and wake up feeling just as awful. Instead, he chose to keep his mouth closed and take the very little quiet and darkness he would get today. Before he falls asleep, he pops another anti nausea tablet and let it dissolve under his tongue as he drifted into his odd little migraine purgatory.