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VOICE MEMO FROM: CAVE JOHNSON
TO: GASTRONOMY LABS
10:22 am 10/2/10
You know what? I'm feeling inspired today! Let’s invest in more Citranium! It’s Aperture Science’s best selling and only selling soda. So let's get working on a new flavor that incorporates a radioactive isotope to give it that extra special sparkle! Don’t ask, it occurred to me in a dream. I was thinking strontium-90. Lab boys think nothing at all so lets try my idea and see if it can save us from bankruptcy.
1:17 pm 18/2/10
I’m going to be frank, our latest trials for Citranium have been disastrous. Multiple deaths. So I'll have gift baskets full of fancy European chocolates sent to the mourning families as opposed to a settlement in court cause god knows I can't afford that, neither would I want to.
1:10 pm 27/2/10
Good news! Our latest trial for Citranium Quantum has been a huge success! We’ve had as little as three deaths this week. That’s a new record low! As a reward, I've arranged a complimentary case full of Citranium Quantum to be delivered to every break room in Aperture. You deserve it!
9:29 pm 1/3/10
Okay, bad news. After drinking about five cans of Citranium Quantum, I've started to experience some...complications. Docs say bone damage, stomach agitation, general agitation, near death experiences. So as of today, we are pulling Citranium Quantum off the shelves. Lab boys say this’d be great for weapons research instead. Still…there goes my investments. And my pulse. Damn it…