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White sat in the common room of Cell Four. The empty seat beside him felt like a physical weight. The lack of Sayeon’s presence made the room feel dim.
Ryujin’s tight, swirling rage burned his senses. The guilt under the anger was mirrored by most everyone in the room. She was wearing the empty frames of Sayeon’s glasses. The red framing her eyes a reminder of what he needed to tell his boss.
Kim’s head is down on the table. Upon being told the news of Sayeon’s death, he had collapsed and not gotten up. Misery, grief, and guilt radiated off of him like a rotten stench.
In front of him, Officer Juni Chang stood at the front of the room. Her gaze was distant. Unfocused. She’d chewed her thumbnail to blood.
Beside her, Instructor Sang stood unwavering. She had been the one to deliver the news. Her face was unmoved. Her aura was a faint tingle of discomfort, like she didn’t want to be in this conversation either.
It was almost comforting. To know this bothered someone so far above in the chain of command.
“Anyone but Kim.” The venom in Ryujin’s voice pulled him from his observations. She had cared about Sayeon, in a way. He would have to bring that up with his boss.
His boss. Sayeon’s sister. This was going to destroy her. His failure in protecting Sayeon was going to haunt him, he was certain. It had been his one purpose here.
“I think you should lead, Ryujin.” He kept his tone even, detached. “You heard most of Sayeon’s thoughts. Understood her best. You’d be best at figuring out what she would have done.”
Ryujin turned in her seat to stare at him. The frames on her face were near jarring to see. White swallowed the lump in his throat. He didn’t know why it was there.
“It’s settled then.” The Instructor’s voice. “Trainee Kang is the new leader of Cell Four. You and Cell Three have the day off, to recuperate from the incident this morning. Dismissed.” She left.
Incident. That was all the crows would see in the life of Samin’s sister.
“We’ll be joining Cell Three and their mentor outside. Come on, you fo–....Three.” Officer Chang spoke up after a long moment of silence. She walked out of the door and into the hall. Her footsteps stopped, waiting for them.
Ryujin was the first to rise. In spite of her anger, her shoulders shook. Like she was struggling to keep it together. She glanced back at him, before exiting.
Kim pushed himself up, once it became clear White would not leave first. His whole body trembled. White caught a glimpse of tears rolling down his cheeks before he wiped his face.
White felt no pity for him. He brought this suffering upon himself.
White rose from his seat and followed the others out. In the hall, Officer Chang, Ryujin and Kim stood. Kim was standing apart from them. White joined his (temporary) mentor and cellmate. Officer Chang sighed and motioned for them to follow her.
Ryujin walked at her heel, two paces behind. Exactly where Sayeon used to walk. She had stepped into the leader role quickly. White was almost upset he wouldn’t be staying long enough to see her properly grow into it.
He put himself a pace behind and to the right. Where Ryujin used to always walk in reference to Sayeon. Kim trailed somewhere behind him.
Exiting the building, Cell Three and their mentor were immediately visible. Officer Cha had his back to the suit’s headquarters. His students were in front of him. The two girls, Dahee and Tsubaki, were crying. Tsubaki was buried into Dahee’s chest, Dahee’s face ducked into the top of her head. Jungwoo was standing closer to them. He looked uncomfortable. Gyeon was standing further away, unbothered.
“Ishaan.” Officer Chan-... Juni called. She grieved Samin's sister. She was deserving of her own name. “We’re here.”
Officer Cha turned around. He and Juni walked far enough away to not be heard. White and his cell joined the other trainees.
At first, they were silent.
“Do you think we could have done anything?” Surprisingly, it was Gyeon who spoke up. He was still looking away. His voice, however, came out sounding thick.
“...Yeah. Some of us definitely could have.” Ryujin was the one who answered him. The guilt in her aura for a moment washed away the anger.
Silence again.
“...I knew her from school.” Jungwoo spoke at last. His voice was hollow. “We didn’t talk, but we had a mutual friend. Jaeil adored her.” His legs trembled, looking as though they were going to give out. “What the fuck am I gonna tell him?”
“What was she like at school?” White knew what Samin thought of her. But to hear it from a classmate would be different.
“She kept to herself. It took forever for her to warm up to Jaeil, but then they were inseparable.” Jungwoo swallowed. He looked to be holding back tears. “I think he loved her. He was always defending her. Everyone hated her. She didn’t even do anything to deserve it.
“Once, a girl from chemistry asked to borrow her notes for a few days. Sayeon didn’t even hesitate to give them to her. That girl took those notes and spread them around every group chat. Without asking her. Jaeil said he told her about it. She said it was okay. That she didn’t mind.” His voice cracked. Tsubaki and Dahee had looked up, still crying. “I guess she was forgiving. Kind, to an extent.”
“That doesn’t sound anything like her.” Gyeon scoffed. “She had my hand chopped off.”
“We should go and tell that Jaeil guy about what happened.” Ryujin cut in. “If they were close, he should know.”
Gyeon nodded. They fell back into silence.
Juni and Officer Cha walked back up to them. “Is anyone hungry?” Juni asked. Collectively, they shook their heads.
“Can we tell Sayeon’s friend about what happened?”
“Sayeon’s friend?” Officer Cha spoke up.
“Jaeil Kim. They’ve been friends for years.” Jungwoo replied.
Officer Cha very suddenly looked vaguely uncomfortable. “We can do that.”
Juni looked as though she were looking through the entire world. Out of focus again.
Jungwoo took the lead, Officer Cha beside him. Everyone else fell in behind.
White would leave after they informed Sayeon’s friend. His boss would surely want to know about this “Jaeil Kim”.
Kim's residence was a small apartment. The lights were off. It was a weekend. He might not even be home.
Jungwoo knocked on the door.
There was no answer. He knocked again.
Silence.
“I don’t think anyone’s home. We might have to go looking for him.”
“Where are the most likely places to find him?”
White tuned out the conversation. He knew where the boy lived. That was all he needed to tell his boss. She would decide what to do from there.
White nudged Juni’s elbow. They were at the back, behind everyone. She glanced at him. He jutted his chin away from the group, asking for privacy. She nodded.
He snuck away from the group, Juni right behind him. “What is it, Min?”
“ I need to tell Sayeon’s sister what happened.”
Juni’s eye widened. “Her sister? Shouldn’t we all go with you?”
“No… Her sister wouldn’t want a crowd of strangers in her grief.”
“...Alright. I’ll let them know what you're up to when we decide where to start looking for her friend.”
“Don’t wait for me.”
White stood before the Crimson Society’s base. Samin was probably inside. If she wasn’t, Senior Jungwoo could call her. White just needed to gather his courage to step inside.
He took in a deep breath and opened the door.
Pink and Silver were playing a card game at the coffee table. Black was watching. Gold and his boss were nowhere in sight. The members present all looked up when he walked in.
“White!” Pink started to stand. “What’re you doing here?”
“Get another day off?” asked Senior Jungwoo.
“... Is the boss here?” Pink stopped half way between him and the chair she’d been sitting in. She looked closely at his face. “What’s wrong? You look like you’re going to cry?”
Silver and Black stood up behind her. “White.” Black started. “What happened?”
“Sayeon’s dead.”
“What?”
“Sayeon’s dead. She took her own life last night.” White’s face was wet. He tasted salt.
Pink crossed the distance between them in three steps. She reached up and cupped his face in her hands. Her thumbs wiped something from his face.
“She killed herself?” Silver sounded disbelieving. He looked a mix of horrified and confused.
Pink pulled him to the couch. “Sit down while we wait for the Boss. Jungwoo, go call her.” Jungwoo turned and left.
Pink took a seat beside him. “We’re not gonna make you talk about this more than once, okay? You can cry all you need to, while we wait.” He was crying?
He reached up and touched his cheek. His fingers came away wet.
He was crying.
Silver, Pink, and Black had been siting with him in silence for the ten minutes it took for the boss to arrive. Pink hadn’t said anything about Sayeon, uncharacteristic of her. She’d always hated Samin’s sister for not loving her. Her silence spoke volumes.
He had been staring at the coffee table the entire time. He hadn’t stopped crying. The things that had been identified as tears were silently streaming down his face.
The entry door opened. His boss walked in. He heard the door shut. Her familiar footsteps approached and stopped in front of him.
“White. Jungwoo said something was wrong with Sayeon?”
“Boss… Sit down.” Senior Jungwoo asked.
Samin stilled. She walked to the nearest armchair and sat down. “Okay. I’m sitting. What’s wrong with Sayeon?”
White struggled past the lump in his throat. “Sayeon is dead.”
“The fuck you mean she’s dead.” His boss stood up. Quick, sharp steps. She knelt in front of him and grabbed his shoulders. “How?”
“Our cellmate, Iseul Kim, thought she wasn’t a good cell leader. He asked her to step down. She agreed.” His boss’s brows furrowed. Confusion, most likely. “Apparently cell leaders can only lose their position through death.”
Her grip on his shoulders tightened to a near painful degree. “While we were all sleeping, she… She used the broken glass from her lenses. Left her stuffed rabbit on Ryujin’s bed.”
“How was she found?” Samin croaked out the question like it was choking her. Tears had started gathering in the corner of her eyes. White saw Pink’s hand reach out and grab Samin’s wrist. She didn’t pull. She just held.
“Ryujin and the girls from Cell Three found her in the morning. She was curled up in a shower stall. Still in uniform. Several arteries carved open. Blood everywhere. She had been gone for hours.”
Samin’s breathing hitched. She shuddered. Then her arms fell limp to her sides. Tears started streaming from her face. Pink dropped from the couch and wrapped her arms around the boss. He had never seen Samin cry before. Her face was buried into Pink’s shoulder, but she did not return the hug.
“Is there anything else, White?” Silver’s voice came softly.
“Sayeon had a friend named Jaeil Kim. He wasn’t home, but another trainee from her school has Cell Three and… the remainder of Cell Four and their mentors are looking for him to tell him what happened.” White took a second to breathe. “Ryujin has Sayeon’s rabbit and glasses- the frames only- Sayeon left her the rabbit and she’s been wearing her frames all day. She’s been the most upset about what happened.”
“Sayeon’s friend doesn’t know and this Ryujin girl is somehow important to Sayeon?”
“Yes.”
“...We’ll keep them in mind. Where does the boy live?”
“An apartment complex. At the corner of Seventh Street and Waveside Avenue. 119, ground floor.”
Their group fell back into silence. White didn’t know what to do. About comforting the boss. The first idea on how to do so was to ask about Sayeon, because she always brightened at the thought of her sister.
The idea felt bitter. Bitter enough to send fresh tears down his face.
White sat in the sound of Sayeon’s sister falling apart.