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It’s only for two months.
The words lingered on the tip of her tongue, bitter. Byleth swallowed them back down, unwilling to taint their last moments of peace with a lie. Only two months—as if the prospect of such a separation was a consolation rather than a curse.
Instead, she buried her face deeper into Dimitri’s chest, savouring the feeling of his strong arms tightening around her. His heart beat against her cheek, fast but steady. It was amazing how familiar it had become after just three months of marriage. How she’d ever fallen asleep without it, Byleth had no idea.
Glumly, she supposed she’d have to learn again.
A single knock on the door echoed through their chambers. “Your Majesty,” Dedue called from the other side. His voice was even lower than normal, reluctance clear in every word. “Your Grace. The carriage is ready.”
Dimitri’s fingers dug deeper into the back of her cloak as Byleth breathed in his comforting scent. Dedue hadn’t technically said that it was time for them to leave the safety of their rooms. The world waited on the king and archbishop, after all. But that privilege came with its own duties, ones that couldn’t be ignored if their dreams of a better world were to ever come true.
Painful as it was, Byleth let her arms drop from around his waist. She could feel Dimitri’s breath stutter against her hair at the motion, could hear the frenzied beat of his heart as he clung to her more fiercely.
Byleth let him.
With a shuddering exhale that sounded more like a sob, Dimitri released her. His hands lingered on her sides even as he took a step back, drifting slowly upward until he was cradling her face between them. Byleth marveled at the gentleness of his hold, so warm and comforting. It was hard to believe he’d ever feared touching her, that he’d been convinced his hands were made only for destruction.
“Byleth…” he murmured, his devastated expression reflecting the pain in her ever-silent heart. She longed to console him, but couldn’t find the words. Instead, Byleth tilted her head back to accept his tender kiss, committing every moment to memory.
This time, it was Dimitri who pulled away first. He offered his arm with a tremulous smile, voice carefully light. “Well then, Your Grace. Shall we?”
Byleth managed a weak smile in return as she slipped her arm through his. “Of course, Your Majesty.”
As husband and wife, they turned toward the door. As king and archbishop, they walked out into the world.
With each step down the halls of Castle Blaiddyd, Byleth felt her mood sink lower. It was irrational, she knew. She was only journeying to Garreg Mach. It was only for two months. They’d spent far longer apart in the past. Dimitri had wandered for five years while she slept. During the first few months of the war they might as well have been separated by an ocean. And even after the war’s end and their mutual proposal, they’d barely seen each other for half a year, as duty forever called them in opposite directions.
But three months of marriage had made her soft, Byleth thought wryly. Once she’d been the Ashen Demon, drifting from place to place without ever knowing the meaning of the word ‘home.’ Now she couldn’t bear the thought of not seeing her husband’s smile for a handful of weeks.
She needed to be strong though. For the people. For Fodlan.
For Dimitri.
Far too soon, the courtyard opened up before them. Byleth nodded at the crowd of servants and nobles, a serene smile plastered on her face. She didn’t truly see them though, her attention fixed on the carriage waiting by the gate. An uncomfortable sensation coiled in her chest. Even as her expression remained unchanged, her fingers dug into Dimitri’s arm.
I don’t want to go…
Ingrid stood by the carriage, bowing elegantly as they approached. Try as she might to appear somber, the knight practically shone with the honour of guarding the archbishop on her journey. She opened the door and stepped aside, leaving no more barrier between Byleth and her fate.
Breathing out slowly, she slipped her arm free and turned to face Dimitri. There was no point in dragging out their farewell. It would only make it more difficult.
Her resolve weakened at the pitiful look on his face, but she had to be strong for the both of them. Not even the tears glittering at the edge of his pale blue eye could stop her.
“Dimitri—”
Before she could say the words, Dimitri was upon her, his lips crushed passionately to hers. Byleth responded without hesitation, kissing him back just as eagerly, deaf to the gasps and whispers of the crowd. Nothing else mattered. In the moment, there was only her and Dimitri.
“Promise me,” he whispered when they finally paused to breathe. Desperation laced his voice, ragged and low. “Promise me you will write, Beloved.”
Byleth brushed their lips together, savouring the handsome flush of his face. “I promise.”
For a moment, they remained wrapped in each other’s embrace. But time couldn’t wait forever. As she pulled away, Dimitri claimed one of her hands. He clung to it, using the excuse of helping her into the carriage to hold it a little longer. But even after she’d settled into her seat, he didn’t let go.
“Take care of yourself, Dimitri,” Byleth said, quietly. Any louder, and she wouldn’t have been able to hide the quaver in her voice.
“I will.” He nodded slowly, eye full of mourning. “Be well…my beloved.”
Byleth couldn’t look away. Not as he pressed a final kiss to her knuckles, the touch burning long after he’d released her hand. Not as Ingrid closed the door, not as the carriage began to move. She leaned out the window, staring at Dimitri—her husband, her beloved, her heart—until at last he’d disappeared from sight.
Even then she continued to watch a little longer. But eventually she collapsed back into her seat, body weak with lethargy.
It was only for two months, she repeated silently to herself.
And yet two months had never felt so long.
“Promise me you will write…”
Fourth of the Blue Sea Moon
04/07/1187
Dimitri,
I’m writing to let you know I’ve arrived at Garreg Mach.
I enjoyed the trip more than I expected. The first day I didn’t want to talk to anyone or see anything. I even went to bed without eating. Ingrid was horrified. She threatened to fly back to Fhirdiad and tell you I was sick if I didn’t eat breakfast. I didn’t want to upset you for no reason, so I made myself eat. The innkeeper was very nervous and made the dish herself. Fresh bread soaked in honey and almond milk, with a side of smoked haddock and local goat cheese. It was delicious. I felt better at once. We will stop there again on the return trip.
After that, I was able to appreciate the travel more, even if it still hurts to be away from you. I ate a different local cuisine at every inn. There are so many kinds of food in the world. Fruits, vegetables, meat, fish, cheese, desserts, tea…I want to try them all. I wouldn’t give up my life with you for anything, but I do miss this part of being a mercenary.
I wish you could have been with me. It would be good for you to see how much your efforts are improving people’s lives. There are still signs of the war, but the villages we passed through are all healing. People are back working in the fields. Houses are being rebuilt. The markets are filled with people and goods. All the children I spoke to like the new travelling teachers. When I told them you planned to open real schools in every village, they were very excited. Some of the parents are still hesitant, but seeing their children smile might change their minds. In one of the villages, a boy gave me a charm for good luck. He was very insistent that I give it to the king, as thanks for saving his family from imperial soldiers in the early years of the war. I’ve included it here.
Last night we stayed with Ashe. We ate roast pheasant with berry sauce and had gingerbread with fresh whipped cream for dessert. There was some tension as the people there are still wary of the Central Church, but luckily Marianne was visiting too. She has become a much better speaker than I remember from the academy. Her words of peace touched everyone. Even Ashe was looking at her like she was a knight of legend. An interesting development. I think there might be another wedding soon.
I can hear Flayn knocking at the door. I was supposed to go down to eat supper with her and Seteth a while ago, but I couldn’t rest until I wrote to you. I did not think the letter would be this long. Even apart, you encourage me to share my thoughts like no one else can.
No doubt Seteth has a list of duties for me to address, but he can wait a little longer. I’ll entrust this letter to Ingrid. No one flies faster than her. Stay safe, and don’t forget to take care of yourself, Dimitri.
I miss you.
—Byleth
Ninth of the Blue Sea Moon
09/07/1187
My Dearest Beloved,
Words cannot express the joy I felt upon receiving your letter. The sight of your familiar writing, the scent of you still lingering upon its pages…my heart soars at these reminders of your beloved self. To hold this letter is to hold you. To kiss your signature is to kiss your precious lips. Knowing that you arrived safely is a balm against the worries that have tormented me each moment since your departure. If not for the need to write my response, I should never let this cherished missive leave my hand. Even now it rests tucked against my heart. But what would I not give to have you in its place, my beloved?
I am delighted to know you enjoyed your trip, though I must admit to being terribly jealous of those blessed with the sight of you tasting new dishes. If it pleases you, I shall ask our chefs to scour our libraries and lands and those far beyond for more unique dishes, that you might enjoy when you return. I have requested that Dedue prepare some sweet buns to send along with this letter, to remind you of our home. I fear dining offers little pleasure when you are not about, Beloved…though of course I have not neglected my obligation to eat! Please do not worry.
I am beyond grateful to learn that our efforts are beginning to bear fruit. The thought of you playing with the children warms my heart, my beloved. Perhaps one day…well. It matters not. Thank you as well for the charm. Though I hardly deserve praise for my actions during those dark years, I shall treasure it forever.
Much remains to be done to heal the wounds of this land. I have been meeting with certain reluctant members of the nobility near daily since you departed. Convincing them to fund these schools continues to be a struggle. I do not care to impose my ideals upon anyone, but I fear my patience with their selfish obstinacy grows weak. How I wish that you were here, my beloved. No one is a match for your unwavering spirit. Though of course, I am king and cannot always run to you to solve my problems. I will resolve this issue. I swear it.
The nobles are not the only hurdle, however. As you mentioned, some of the commonfolk leaders I have spoken with are less enthusiastic than I had hoped. But I believe you are correct. When they hear of the children’s excitement, surely even the coldest heart must melt. In the meantime, I have been revising the budgets and consulting with the School of Sorcery about the curriculum. Perhaps you might have suggestions? I have never met your equal as a professor, after all.
I appreciate your concern, but there is truly no need to worry about me, Beloved. Though I long for you each passing moment, I assure you that I am doing well. Please do not trouble yourself.
And yet, I cannot wait until you return to my side, Byleth. How I yearn for the touch of your kind hands once more…
Yours eternally,
—Dimitri
Tenth of the Blue Sea Moon
10/07/1187
Your Grace,
I write to you of His Majesty’s condition. Do not believe anything he says about taking care of himself. He has been throwing himself into work to an unhealthy degree, often refusing to eat proper meals. His Majesty has also been staying up unreasonably late and falling asleep at his desk nightly since you left. I must tell you that he has been irritable as well. He even yelled at Felix the other day. It was deserved, but still a shocking event. His Majesty regretted it after, but was too agitated to apologize.
As he refuses to listen to me or anyone else here, I ask that you speak of the matter in your next letter. His Majesty has always valued your opinion, especially now that you are his wife and queen. He carries your last letter everywhere. When he reads it, he looks happier than I have seen him since you left. It concerns me.
I hope you are well.
—Dedue
Seventeenth of the Blue Sea Moon
17/07/1187
Dimitri,
I’m glad to hear my letter brought you comfort. I wish it were me you were kissing though. Thinking about the letter getting to rest on your chest and listen to your heartbeat annoys me. That is my place. Perhaps I am finally learning what jealousy is…I do not like it.
I know that you can handle the lords and commoners, Dimitri. You are more charismatic than you realize. There’s no need for you to impose your will on anyone—the people will follow where you lead. That said, remember that it is all right to rely on others. It is not a weakness to ask for help. I want to support you. We all do. Please do not overwork yourself.
I’m not sure I’m the best person to ask about curriculum though. I appreciate your faith in me. But I believe you enjoyed my classes for reasons other than my teaching. Seteth always made horrible faces when he looked at my lesson plans. Apparently dishonourable strategies aren’t an appropriate subject for the Officers Academy. I think he’s glad I wasn’t around for the reopening earlier this year.
Maybe you’d be better off asking Seteth. He made a schedule for me to learn all the rituals and hymns for the Goddess’s Rite of Rebirth at the end of the month. If Sothis were still around, she would much rather have a party with dancing and good food. She hated long sermons. I tried to tell Seteth that, but he just gave me a lecture on the importance of symbolism, especially now when people are still struggling. I suppose he’s right. But I will change this one day.
Flayn saved me from more memorization. She asked that the traditional sermon for Saint Cethleann’s Day be replaced with her favourite hymns. Seteth caved immediately. It was impressive. As thanks, I decided to catch her a Fodlandy again this year. Early morning is the best time to fish, so I went to the pond before the ceremony started. Since I wasn’t sure if I’d have time to get ready, I wore the archbishop outfit and regalia. I knew it wouldn’t get in the way. Fishing is just a lot of sitting after all. Seteth did not agree. Thankfully, he calmed down when he saw how happy the fish made Flayn. He is a hopelessly indulgent father. I think you would be the same…
Eighteenth of the Blue Sea Moon
18/07/1187
Dimitri,
I received a letter from Dedue this morning. Do not be angry with him. He is only worried for you, as you would be for him.
I know you don’t want to upset me, but please don’t try to hide your suffering. I’m not your professor anymore. I can’t tell you what to do. But I am your wife, and I love you.
It’s difficult to be apart. I understand. I hate lying in bed without you, and my chest feels empty when I look at the moon. But neglecting your health and hiding your troubles will only make things worse. You have a kind heart, Dimitri. It’s why I fell in love with you. Please show that same compassion to yourself.
I don’t have the words to express my feelings as prettily as you. But I miss you. I love you. I wish I was with you.
—Byleth
Twenty-fifth of the Blue Sea Moon
25/07/1187
My Beloved Byleth,
You are right. You are always right. I have behaved most shamefully these past few weeks since your departure, falling back into old habits that once nearly led to my ruin. I have apologized to the others, and now I apologize to you, Beloved. I should not have attempted to hide my pain from you. I am deeply sorry.
I will tell you now, though it pains me. I miss you more than any words can say. Each passing moment, I yearn for you, and yet the nights are worst of all. When I wake in the darkness and you are not by my side, I feel lost. I fear that it has all been a dream, that I am still trapped in those years of endless night, when you and all I loved were gone. I cannot rest again after, even when I remember the truth. And so I have avoided sleep, working late into the night to escape its dreadful coils. It is an old habit, as you are no doubt aware. Only one step away from pacing the cathedral and pleading with those long gone.
I know that if you were here, you would tell me that I have done nothing of which to be ashamed. I am trying to believe that, and yet even now I struggle. I am supposed to be better. Still, I must not give up the fight. I cannot promise that I will never make mistakes again, but what is most important is that I forgive myself and keep trying, again and again. That is what you taught me, my beloved. Your greatest lesson of all.
And I have been trying. After receiving your blessed letter last night, I retired before the eleventh bell. I awoke more than once, but the reminder of you lying on the pillow beside me was a comfort each time. Dedue listened patiently to my troubles over breakfast this morning. Felix was not quite as generous during dinner, and yet his irritation was a comfort of its own. I plan to rest again soon—only first I must finish this letter to you.
I am delighted to hear of your first jealousy, my beloved. Does it bother you to know that two letters now share my bed? Do you wish to rip them to shreds and reclaim that place that belongs to you and you alone? I understand well how you feel, and yet I must argue that my suffering is far greater. To know that crowds of people may listen to you sing and lecture, that they may gaze upon your divine beauty whenever they wish…each and every one of them praying to see your mesmerizing smile, begging to capture even a moment of your time, falling to their knees to receive your gracious blessing—these cursed thoughts torment me relentlessly. My jealousy can hardly be restrained. You are correct again, Beloved. Though I would defend your teaching to my death, I must confess that my interest went far beyond the academic.
Speaking of the academy, I bear fresh news of one of your former students. The Almyran envoy arrived two days past—but to my shock, Prince Khalid was none other than Claude! He was quite amused by my surprise, as I am sure you can imagine. Once again, he proved to be a worthy foe, willing to exploit any advantage in our treaty negotiations. He wasted no time in bringing up his lack of invitation to our wedding in an attempt to guilt me, as though it was not he who vanished mysteriously into the sunset! When that failed, he argued that I ought to acquiesce to his demands because it was (allegedly) his day of birth. It was undoubtedly the most chaotic negotiation I have ever witnessed. And yet, in the end Claude proved that he truly cares for the people of Fodlan and Almyra alike. I am satisfied with the result of our treaty, and I believe you will be too.
As planned, we exchanged a wealth of gifts with the envoy. Claude offered countless silks and jewels that await your return nearly as eagerly as I do. I have enclosed the one I believe you will love best—a traditional Almyran dagger with a lioness on its hilt. Please do not tell Sylvain.
Thank you once more for your support, my beloved. I know that I can never truly repay your endless compassion, but I beg you to remember that I am always here to listen to your sorrows in return. For I am your servant in love, now and forever.
—Dimitri
First of the Verdant Rain Moon
01/08/1187
Dimitri,
Thank you for confiding in me. It hurts to know that our separation is causing you so much pain, but I’m glad that you’re choosing to rely on our friends. You are not alone. You will never be alone again. And you’re right. I don’t think you should be ashamed. Everyone makes mistakes. What matters is that you’re trying.
It is irritating not to be with you. I want to comfort you in person. To hold your hand and pet your hair in the night. I disagree that your jealousy is worse. People might listen to my sermons or talk to me in public. But my letters are stealing your kisses. I will burn them when I return.
I’m glad to hear Claude is well. Was it really so surprising to find out he’s Almyran? I thought it was obvious. A prince though…he will be an invaluable ally going forward. Especially if he keeps offering good gifts. I love the dagger, Dimitri. It’s perfect. The weight and balance is ideal for throwing, but the edge slices cleanly. I hope you like the forget-me-nots I cut with it. The colour reminds me of your eyes.
It’s a relief for the Rite of Rebirth to finally be over. The preparations were worse than the actual ceremony. I apologize for all of the assignments I gave you as a student. I see now how cruel they were. The Rite itself was more enjoyable than I expected. Even if I still think she’d prefer less sermons, it was nice to see everyone celebrating Sothis. Flayn and I even managed to sneak out to the festival in town with Alois’s help. The food was delicious. I had beast meat teppanyaki, fruit and herring tarts, and spicy fish dango. People started to recognize me before we could eat more. I thought they’d be uncomfortable, but everyone seemed happy. Their smiles were genuine. It made me happy too.
I wish you were here to enjoy it with me. But I missed you even more in the nights leading up to it. I didn’t want to worry you, but I realized I should follow my own advice. I kept having nightmares of the Rite back at the academy. When we first faced the Death Knight. I see you dying by his lance again and again. Divine Pulse is never enough. In real life it was. If you were in the bed beside me, it would be easier to remember that. But when I wake up alone…I understand why you try to avoid sleep.
Now that the Rite is over, the dreams seem to have passed. Still, I can’t wait to see you again. I only need to get through this upcoming meeting with the cardinals. And then I can return.
Stay safe.
—Byleth
Eighth of the Verdant Rain Moon
08/08/1187
To the Light of my Life,
My heart breaks to read of your suffering, Beloved. I would give anything to be by your side, to hold you in my arms and protect you from the darkness of the world. One as pure and kind as you should not be touched by fear and nightmares. Only joyful dreams should bless you with their presence, as you have blessed all of Fodlan with your endless light of hope. Scarcely had your letter fallen from my hand that I sought to leave Fhirdiad and rush to your side, but after much effort, Dedue and Ingrid managed to persuade me that you would not approve of that course of action. I hope at least the image might grant you a smile.
I grieve to know my past foolishness haunts you even now, and yet words cannot express my gratitude that you would trust me with such vulnerability. It is an honour that I cannot imagine deserving, but shall treasure all the same. I was glad when you chose to share the burden of your divine powers with me before our wedding, and now my relief is even greater. To think of how you once suffered in silence, how you would be suffering even now without anyone to support you…It is true, what you have told me countless times. Sharing our pain may not heal it, but it makes it easier to bear. Thank you for finding the strength to tell me, my beloved.
I can think of no better words than those you graced me with in your last letter. You are not alone, Beloved. And you shall never be alone again.
Though I cannot be by your side to comfort you, perhaps I might cheer you with news. Since the Almyran envoy departed (Claude sends his regards, of course, as well as some inappropriate insinuations that I will not repeat), I have devoted my attention to our plans for educational reform. Yesterday, I finally achieved a breakthrough with one of the more reluctant lords. On my visit to our experimental school in the outskirts of Fhirdiad, I insisted that the new Count Mateus accompany me. He was quite reluctant, but the joy and hope of the children touched his heart more than I ever believed possible. The count has agreed to fund similar schools in his own region, and vowed to speak with his former allies on our behalf. I cannot express how rewarding it was to have solved this dispute with compassion rather than violence, my beloved. Let us hope the others follow suit.
No doubt that as you read this, you are worrying that I have broken my many promises and overworked myself once more. Do not fear, Beloved. Difficult as it has been at times, I have kept to my vows and taken time to relax and speak with our friends.
A few days past, I took tea in the gardens with Dedue and Mercedes. It was a pleasant afternoon, marred only by your absence. Did you know the two of them have plans to open a special cultural school in Fhirdiad’s Duscur district after their wedding? Dedue was rather embarrassed to tell me, but Mercedes was full of pride. It is a wonderful idea, in my opinion. The kingdom once did its best to destroy Duscur; it is only right that we should support its regrowth wherever the people may now dwell.
As lovely as their company was, I must confess that I began to feel like an intruder as the afternoon progressed. Is that how others feel in our presence, I wonder? Regardless, I chose to leave them be and walk through the gardens alone. I had hoped to find flowers beautiful enough to compare to the precious forget-me-nots you sent (they are in a vase on my desk, a constant reminder of your love even in the darkest times). Instead, I came across this owl feather, fallen amongst the lilies. It reminded me most touchingly of our time at the academy. I had quite the collection of feathers, each a cherished gift from my beloved professor. I hope this one will bring you as much happiness as those brought me.
Oh, my beloved…to think that in just two more weeks, I may once again hold you close. I dream of kissing your kind hands, of witnessing your mesmerizing smile. Of falling asleep with you by my side and waking each morning to the warmth of your love. Waiting is torturous, yet joy lightens my every step. Two weeks, and we shall be together. I cannot wait.
I love you, I love you. A thousand times I love you.
May your journey be safe.
—Dimitri
Fourteenth of the Verdant Rain Moon
14/08/1187
Dimitri,
My return has been delayed.
There is nothing to worry about. No one is hurt. I love you. I will be with you again, as soon as I can.
My meeting with the cardinals took an unfortunate turn. Seteth and I were not expecting any difficulties, since the cardinals have always respected Rhea’s wishes and been open to our reforms. They have grown impatient about the former imperial territories though. There is a faction that wants me to increase the Church’s reach and bring back the Southern Church. I refused of course. Tensions are still high in the south. People are happy to accept our healing and charity, but pushing them would be unwise. I will not cause another war.
I’m sorry, Dimitri. But I can’t leave Garreg Mach until this matter is resolved. I’m meeting with the cardinals again in two weeks. I’ve sent messages to some of the bishops and clerics working in Adrestia, asking them to come and speak about their experiences. I suspect the conference will last a few days at least. Seteth thinks it will be a week or more. I wish I could ask Rhea to fix this. I know they would listen to her. But I am the archbishop now. If I can’t solve this myself, the cardinals will never respect me.
I’m sorry.
Being apart from you is difficult. I have not felt well the past few days. My stomach is upset. I am always tired. I think it is because I miss you. Your letter helped though. Thank you for the owl feather. The memories made me smile. I understand why the others kept you from leaving. They were right. But an illogical part of me wishes you were here to hold me.
Congratulations on your success with Count Mateus. I’m proud of you, Dimitri. I always knew you could solve this problem with your gentle heart.
Sorry. I wanted to write more, but I can barely stay awake. Please take care of yourself. I know you will be strong. Remember that we will be together again soon.
I love you.
—Byleth
Twentieth of the Verdant Rain Moon
20/08/1187
Beloved,
You were forced to make a difficult decision. I understand well how you feel. It is our duty as leaders to prioritize the needs of the people over our own desires, and you are correct to defend our subjects in the south. I admire as always your compassion and sensitivity toward their suffering, for I often fear that my old prejudices will prevent me from protecting them as is their due. You are a true queen, my beloved, and I know you will prevail.
And yet, it is difficult even to lift my quill pen. I do not wish to trouble you with my selfish weakness. To cause you pain or guilt is my greatest fear. But I know better than to try to hide my true feelings from you, Beloved. You always see straight through my feeble façade. And surely nothing will mask the tear stains blurring each stroke of ink.
I feel lost, Byleth. As though I am wandering in the darkness once again. But I know I must be strong. I am the king. The people need me. I must…
Twenty-third of the Verdant Rain Moon
23/08/1187
My cherished dove,
You have my deepest apologies for the delay in this letter. I must confess that the last few days have passed in a daze. Though I forced myself to be the attentive king during the day, at night all of my will faded away to naught, and I could not bring myself to finish my letter. It is better that I did not, I think. The misery in each word would not have been fit for your loving eyes.
I am relieved to tell you that those shadows have passed. While I had thought myself to be performing quite well in the daytime, my mood was apparently obvious to all.
This morning, I was surprised to find Annette waiting in my office. She announced that my gloominess had lasted long enough, and so she had decided that I would be taking the day off and accompanying her around Fhirdiad instead. I tried to protest, but Annette can be quite fearsome, as I am sure you are aware. She even invoked your name, my beloved. I could hardly deny her after that.
Truthfully, I was not pleased to be dragged out into the sunlight. Any who had not already noticed my ill mood surely saw it then. But with each step amongst the commonfolk, I felt the weight of misery lift farther from my shoulders. Though we wore disguises, people were quick to recognize me. I feared my presence would cause everyone discomfort, but to my amazement, the people were excited. Many were eager to talk of our reforms, or to tell me their stories of Fhirdiad’s liberation. It was most touching, and I certainly shed more than my fair share of tears. But their love for you made me happiest of all. The people adore their fair queen and noble archbishop nearly as much as I do. I do not have the space here to recount each loving word they spoke of you, but I shall repeat them amidst our kisses when you are finally in my arms once more.
Between our chats with the people, Annette and I visited a number of interesting shops and market stalls. She brought me to her favourite bakery first. It was a charming location, and though I cannot personally verify the quality of its baked goods, Annette assured me they are the most delicious treats in Fhirdiad. I would love to bring you there when you return, my beloved. We must also visit the markets. There were too many flower shops to count, and several vendors selling exquisite blades. I purchased a rare ceremonial sword for Felix as thanks for enlisting Annette’s aid today (though of course he denies ever having been worried!) and commissioned a dagger from a Duscuri blacksmith for Dedue’s upcoming birthday. There is also a new restaurant hailing all the way from Morfis that I believe you would enjoy. The smells were quite delicious.
Though I wish I could send you treats and trinkets from across the city, I shall content myself with an offering of tea. The shop was filled with such an overwhelming number of flavours that I found myself paralyzed with indecision. Thankfully, the owner was quite patient. When I told her of your troubled stomach, she recommended ginger. Apparently it is particularly helpful for young women. She also sends her congratulations, though she only smiled when I asked why. Perhaps for winning the war? The anniversary of its end does approach. Regardless, I pray that this humble gift might grant you comfort.
Another week has passed without you by my side. And yet, I must remind myself that each day spent apart only brings us closer to reunion. Please do not follow my example and instead write your response straight away. I long for news of you, my beloved. Each word written by your blessed hand sustains me more than food and water ever could.
My heart beats for you and you alone.
—Dimitri
Twenty-ninth of the Verdant Rain Moon
29/08/1187
Dimitri,
As ordered by my king, I have started writing this letter immediately.
Thank you for the tea. I look forward to drinking it. I am certain that any gift from you will make me feel better. Just reading your letter calmed the empty ache in my chest. I’m glad to hear you had fun. I can’t wait to visit the shops and stalls with you. Especially the restaurants. I had food from Morfis once, when I was a child. My memories of the past aren’t always clear, but I remember that. It was delicious. Jeralt liked it too. It will be nice to share it with you.
Please tell Annette that I am pleased with her efforts. She would receive an S+ if this was graded.
Our conference had a promising start. We had our first meeting with the cardinals and other clergy yesterday. The opposing faction prepared many arguments, but I believe we made some progress toward the end of the day. The clerics working in Adrestia are sensitive to the feelings of the people. They are not always as well-spoken as the cardinals, but they are still compelling. At least one cardinal was swayed by their words. I hope this will be resolved soon.
I didn’t have much to do last week. There were only so many things to prepare. I started wandering around the monastery one day, and eventually ended up in the training grounds. Before I realized it, there was a group of academy students watching me practice. Apparently Manuela brought them there for a lesson. They were nervous, but asked me for advice.
It was nice. I enjoy the good I can do as archbishop, but I do miss teaching. The students were all very eager to learn from ‘a legend.’ They were so earnest…it reminded me of those children we taught together. After the lesson was over, they wanted to hear stories about your class. Especially about the Saviour King as a student. I’m not sure if they were more shocked or amused to hear about your behaviour toward your teacher. I attended a few more classes during the rest of the week. I enjoyed meeting the new students. You would be happy to know how different they all are. Claude once said that Garreg Mach was Fodlan in a nutshell. Seeing this new academy, I hope that his words will one day become true.
Still, some stories were harder to tell than others, especially with the anniversary of the war’s end so close. I wish that I was with you. I wish this letter could reach you by tomorrow. But I know that you are not alone, and that you are stronger than you believe.
I hope you aren’t too jealous to hear of my new students, Dimitri. Don’t worry. No one could ever replace you as my favourite.
I love you.
—Byleth
Twenty-ninth of the Verdant Rain Moon
29/08/1187
Dedue,
Happy birthday. I hope you like this watering can. It’s imbued with a charm to keep water at the correct temperature.
Thank you for always looking out for Dimitri. I appreciate your loyalty and hard work. Don’t forget to take your own breaks.
—Byleth
Fifth of the Horsebow Moon
05/09/1187
My darling wife,
Oh, to be your student once more…to listen to your wise lectures and bear witness to your unparalleled skill, to have your kind hands adjusting my stance, unaware of the maddening dreams you inspired. Each moment that I saw you with another, straightening their grips as they stammered and blushed, foul jealousy nearly overcame me. Perhaps now that I am older, I should let such petty feelings fade away. But I cannot deny the bitter curl of my lip to see you call them ‘your’ students. You tease me, I know. You can be a cruel woman, my beloved, but it only drives me more passionately to win your undivided attention. Is that your true goal, I wonder?
Aside from my childish jealousy, your account of the academy fills me with joy. I pray that the students might learn from each other, and inspire the birth of a more accepting world. I blush to think of the stories you may have told them, yet I shall endure the embarrassment if it reminds them that even the king is but a man, not someone to be revered above all and obeyed without question. Such worship can only ever lead to suffering, after all.
I hope that the anniversary of the war was not too painful for you, my beloved. I must confess that it was a difficult day for me. I dreamed of my sister that night…we were children again, dancing in the gardens of her uncle’s estate. It was such a happy memory. And yet before I knew it, she was lying on the floor of that throne room, her blood dripping from my hands. I spent the rest of the night in the training grounds, though not even that could chase away her voice. I doubt anything ever truly will.
But you are correct, Beloved. I am not alone, not even when duty forces us apart. Dedue remained by my side until morning, as steady a presence as ever. Though exhausted, I attended the ceremony marking the war’s end. Fortunately I did not have to speak, for my tears could not be contained. Sylvain graciously assumed the role in my place, and gave a most touching speech on the loss and suffering of war. You would be quite proud of him, I am certain. Afterward, we dined privately with Dedue, Felix, and Ingrid. A gathering of war heroes, as the new academy students might call us, but there was no celebration on that night. Instead, we spoke of our grim memories of those times. Perhaps it is odd to say, but I am grateful that my friends shared their pain with me. They have supported me unwaveringly, no matter how deep into depravity I descended. It was rewarding to offer them words of comfort for once, and to see the light return to their eyes.
I dreamed of Edelgard again that night. We were drinking tea at the academy, surrounded by a sea of roses. A false memory, I know, and yet it felt so real. I could not quite see her face, nor hear her words, but I am certain she was smiling…
Wishful thinking, surely.
Regardless, the following day was replete with joy. It was an arduous task, but eventually Mercedes succeeded in coaxing Dedue away from my side to pass the morning in the city. The rest of the Blue Lions began to arrive after that (secretly, of course!) and the lingering darkness of my mood dissipated as we prepared for Dedue’s birthday celebration. Ashe outshone us all with the feast that he concocted. I have rarely smelled such delectable food. Dedue was shocked when he returned. I wish you could have seen his expression, Beloved! It was a rare and precious sight. The rest of the night passed in merriment, marred only by your absence. Though it arrived a little late, Dedue was most charmed by your gift and sends his thanks.
Would it be cruel to tell you of each dish that we enjoyed? And yet you teased me so mercilessly earlier, that I feel my vengeance is deserved. Alas, I cannot bear the thought of your anger, even for the briefest moment. And so I shall entertain you with this delightful news instead—Ashe did not arrive alone! Lady von Edmund rode alongside him. You see as clearly as ever, my beloved.
How dearly I wish you could have celebrated with us. To see the other merry couples holding hands and sharing secret smiles, when I have not kissed your tender lips for what feels an eternity, was a suffering unlike any other. I pray to the goddess each night that she shall guide you back to my side with all swiftness, for I cannot bear the thought of being away from you on the true day of your birth. You deserve to be cherished and celebrated, surrounded by the love of your friends. I can allow nothing less.
Even apart, know that you are always in my thoughts, haunting my dreams with the sweetness of your kiss.
May we meet again soon, my most beloved Byleth.
—Dimitri
Tenth of the Horsebow Moon
10/09/1187
Dimitri,
By the time you read this, I will be on my way home.
I don’t know how to describe the emotions I’m feeling. It reminds me of the days before our wedding. My head feels light. Something in my stomach flutters. Everyone keeps commenting on how much I’m smiling. Flayn has informed me that I am acting like a maiden in love. I believe she is correct. Other than the maiden part. You made sure of that.
When I think about how happy you’ll be to read this, my smile grows even larger. It is painful, but I can’t stop. I hope you won’t kiss this letter too much. Save some for me.
As you can guess, our negotiations with the cardinals are done. It was slow, but Seteth and I were able to convince them of their folly with the help of the Adrestian clergy. The ceremony marking the war’s end was the final piece to persuade them. Everyone was moved by the grief and remembrance of the dead. Despite our victory over the cardinals, my heart ached with the memories of war.
I wish we could have been together on the anniversary, but I’m glad to know you and the Lions had each other. You help them more than you know, Dimitri. You’re like the moon. A guiding light in the darkness for us all.
Sorry. I’m not as good at poetry as you. These emotions caused by our approaching reunion are making me speak foolishly. I will try to restrain my sentiment.
The past few days have been even busier than the rest. After closing the conference, I rushed to finish all other church matters. I couldn’t have managed it on my own. Luckily, I have Seteth and Flayn. Hanneman and Manuela. Alois too. Even Yuri showed up from somewhere to help. Thanks to them, I leave tomorrow morning.
One more week, and I will be able to kiss you again. As much as I want. Whenever I want. My chest feels so full that I might start writing poetry again.
There is something I must tell you once we are together. Don’t worry. It is happy news. I can already imagine your smile, brighter than the full moon…
I love you, my heart.
—Byleth
It had been nearly three months.
Three months since he’d held his beloved. Since he’d kissed her gentle lips and heard her steady voice. Three months of yearning, a perpetual emptiness in his soul. They’d been apart for as long as they’d lived together in marriage, and yet how different those months had felt.
And now…
By the time you read this, I will be on my way home.
Dimitri placed a hand on his chest, where Byleth’s final letter lay safely tucked against his heart. He’d been repeating the gesture all day, unable to stop the wistful sigh that escaped him each time. Unseemly behaviour for a king. Especially when the eyes of nobles and servants alike studied his every move. But at this point, the physical reminder of his beloved was the only thing keeping him from pacing around the courtyard like a lion in a cage.
His beloved who was surely now within the walls of Fhirdiad, riding ever closer to his side. Who he would soon be able to touch in place of her letters…
“Could you stop doing that for five minutes?” Felix snapped when Dimitri sighed yet again. “It’s not going to make the professor get here any faster, you know!”
“Felix—!” a chorus of voices hissed from behind him. It was impossible to tell which Lion was saying what, their various censures all blending into one.
Dimitri couldn’t help but smile. Being apart from Byleth had been torturous. And yet he’d survived, better than he’d expected. All thanks to the support of his friends, who’d stood by him through the darkest times and offered him a hand whenever he needed it most.
And—though it was difficult to admit—thanks to his own resolve.
“It is all right,” Dimitri began to say when he noticed Ingrid gesturing at Felix with her lance, but his words were cut off by the ringing of bells.
A hush fell over the crowd. Or perhaps the world simply became silent for Dimitri, now unable to hear or see anything but the guards pulling open the gates. He took a step forward as a contingent of the Knights of Seiros rode in, Alois sitting proudly at their head.
And behind them, a carriage.
Alois pulled his horse to a stop, beaming. “I am honoured to announce the arrival of Her Grace,” he called out in his booming voice. Dimitri took another unconscious step forward, his heart pounding furiously. “Archbishop of the Church of Seiros and Queen Consort of the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus. The one, the only, the Lady Byleth Eis—h-hey!”
Dimitri barely noticed Alois as he charged toward the carriage. A knight had already opened the door by the time he arrived, stepping aside to reveal—
Byleth.
She was even more beautiful than he remembered. Dimitri was frozen in place, overwhelmed by love and awe and longing and joy and hope. He could only watch as Byleth exited the carriage, standing before him for the first time in nearly three months. She was alive. Gorgeous. Divine. The true goddess of Fodlan, pale hair glowing like a halo in the dying sunlight, eyes filled with graceful benevolence. Dimitri longed to throw himself at her feet, to worship her like she deserved. To hold her, to kiss her, to love her. His wife. His beloved. His Byleth.
She smiled, slight and warm and mesmerizing. “I’m home, Dimitri.”
The sound of his name in her flat voice broke the enchantment holding him in place. Dimitri moved without even realizing it, closing the distance between them in an instant. When their lips met—finally, after so long apart—all other thoughts fled him. There was only Byleth, swept up in his embrace, her own kisses just as desperate, just as filled with love. He lifted her into the air, cuddling her tight against his chest until their bodies were as close as they could be.
“I love you,” Dimitri whispered when they broke apart to breathe. He pressed their foreheads together, near enough still that their lips brushed with each word. Tears gathered in his eye, emotion fumbling the words in his throat. “Byleth, I—”
Before he could break down fully, her hands had moved to cradle his face. Warm and kind and unbelievably strong, holding him together even as he sobbed from joy.
“I love you too,” Byleth said. Simple, yet infused with such deep affection. How he’d ever imagined her to be heartless, Dimitri didn’t know.
He would have stood there forever, wrapped in her beloved embrace, if not for a polite cough. Dimitri reluctantly tore his gaze away to find Dedue waiting beside them, his smile faint but genuine.
“I am glad to see you well, Your Grace,” he said with a respectful nod in her direction. “Your chambers have been prepared for your return, should you wish to retire.”
Ah. Right.
Heat crept up the back of Dimitri’s neck as he regained awareness of their surroundings. Such a passionate display before his people—it was shameful behaviour for a king. And yet he couldn’t really bring himself to care, not when his beloved Byleth was back in his arms.
Still, she deserved to rest after her long journey. Smiling bashfully at the gathered crowd, Dimitri carried Byleth through the courtyard and back toward the castle. The people cheered as he passed, their fervour only increasing when Byleth began to wave cutely.
An understandable reaction, truly.
With each step through the halls of Castle Blaiddyd, Dimitri felt his already joyous mood rise to unimaginable heights. He was practically floating, the weight of Byleth in his arms the only thing that kept him grounded.
Neither spoke until they’d reached the safety of their chambers. There at last they could be nothing more than husband and wife.
Not yet able to let her go, Dimitri continued to carry Byleth toward their bed. Both of their gazes were drawn to the stack of letters placed lovingly on her pillow. Dimitri smiled. Byleth did not.
“Thank you for writing so diligently, my beloved,” he murmured, kissing away her adorable pout. “Your letters saved me, as surely as your kind hands once did.”
Her expression softened. “I’m glad. Yours comforted me just as much.”
Dimitri doubted that, but there was no time for arguing. Instead, he tilted his head down for yet another kiss. His beloved indulged him most graciously once, twice, even a third time. But before he could deepen the kiss and lose himself fully in her love, Byleth turned her face aside.
“We can continue after,” she said, soothing away his wounded feelings with a pat on the head. “But there’s something I have to tell you first.”
She had mentioned something like that in her last letter, had she not? Dimitri had been too overwhelmed by her sudden return to dwell on the possibilities, too distracted with the planning of her birthday celebrations on the morrow and helping—well, bothering—Dedue as he prepared the meal now waiting in their private dining room. It was probably for the best. No matter her reassurances that it was good news, Dimitri had a tendency to spiral. Even now, he felt a little uneasy as she slipped from his hold and landed lightly on the floor.
For a moment, Byleth only stared up at him, expression unreadable. Then, gently—as though he was something delicate and fragile, something to be treasured—she took his hand and placed it against her stomach.
Dimitri’s breath caught in the back of his throat.
Every one of Byleth’s smiles was a blessing. Each mesmerizing in its own way. But the joy overflowing from her now was the most radiant sight he’d ever witnessed.
“Dimitri. I’m pregnant.”
Pregnant…
Dimitri felt dazed. Lightheaded. Like his heart was about to burst. He was going to have a child. A family. With Byleth.
Fresh tears welling up in his eye, Dimitri dropped to his knees and rested his forehead against her stomach. “Thank you,” he whispered, words choked by emotion. “Thank you, Byleth. For everything.”
She didn’t speak, but she didn’t need to. The kind hand stroking his hair was the only answer he needed.
Dimitri knew that duty would force them apart again. It was inevitable. A reality of their lives.
But wrapped in Byleth’s loving embrace, hope for the future brighter than it had ever been, Dimitri made a vow.
To cherish their every moment, together and apart, from now until the end of their days.
