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It all began when Jade realized her milk bucket had disappeared overnight. This was not an especially surprising occurance in and of itself — this was Troll country, after all. Pails of all sorts were snatched away frequently, not that anyone quite knew why. Trolls were belligerent gray horned creatures that lived under bridges and demanded tolls from passersby. It would be sheer folly, if not outright madness, to attempt to converse with one.
Jade just sighed and shrugged in resignation. The milk bucket would be easy enough to replace. But then she noticed the absence of something else; something considerably more important and harder to get: the sickles she used to harvest many of the ingredients for her potions.
"Oh noooo!"
The nearest blacksmith skilled enough to make what she needed was two or three villages away; Jade would be gone all day. She grumbled to herself as she set out with her basket loaded with coins and important travelling supplies and her hunting bow slung over her shoulder. Spending all day on the road so she could buy a new pair of sickles was pretty much the last thing she wanted to do today.
At least it was a fairly pleasant journey. Clouds like spun wool flitted around the warm sun, offering patches of shade here and there, and a gentle breeze stirred the air. Once Jade's frustration began to fade, she marched through meadow and forest with a spring in her step.
It was about noon when she reached the first of two bridges she would have to cross on her journey. It was a rickety, almost superfluous-seeming thing spanning a tiny, muddy stream along the edge of the patch of woods Jade had just emerged from. With the same sort of practiced habit as checking for oncoming carts before crossing a path, she cautiously peeked to see if there was a troll residing beneath the bridge.
There were no signs of a troll, not even a sleeping-basket in the muddy shallows. All of a sudden, Jade got an idea that made her wonder for a moment if perhaps she'd been spending too much time around the guildmaster's son. She reached into her pocket, glancing around furtively, and pulled out a small, milky-white orb — a gift from a friend.
Will someone else pass over this bridge soon?
Jade bit her forefinger and allowed a few droplets of blood to pool on her fingertip before smearing it across the surface of the orb. She stared at it in intense concentration for a few moments, watching the blood fade and then reappear in a new configuration.
Satisfied, she smiled to herself, tucked the orb back into her pocket, and slid down the embankment to wait. Jade crouched beneath the bridge, listening for footsteps. The sounds of the water were incredibly soothing, and they gently carried her thoughts away like untied boats. Jade was just beginning to think about how wonderful it would be if she could somehow bottle that up and sell it when suddenly footfalls began to sound on the bridge above her.
She scrambled up the embankment frantically, sending clumps of dirt flying beneath her feet. As she crested the top she shouted the first words that appeared in her mind. "Password, fuckass!"
Jade gasped in horror and surprise when the realization hit her. It was a troll, and he looked anything but amused.
Her first thought, after the initial shock, was how unlike her preconceived notions of trolls he was. This was practically a boy, all skin and bones in his tattered pants, and she could barely see the horns amidst his unkempt pitch-black hair. He gave her a bewildered stare for a few moments, eyes as wide and yellow as egg yolks.
And then he brandished a farming implement at her and started shouting. Jade flinched.
"I'm sorry, alright?" She took a few careful steps back, holding up her hands to show she meant him no harm. "I didn't know you lived here — and... I don't speak Trollish."
"No 'Trollish'," he growled in a voice like honey and daggers, "Call Aaltaerrniaan."
"Alright," Jade said, shrugging defensively, "I don't speak...Alternian. And that's my sickle you're brandishing at me!"
"No yours!" the troll shouted. "Mine!"
Jade's frustration began to eclipse her uneasy curiosity, and she unslung her hunting bow from her back slowly. "Those are mine, you asshole! You stole them from my workshop!"
He hissed at her, fear and resigned sadness bleeding into the edges of his anger. "Khaarrkhaet blood so low, all troll take hive-bridge!" He sighed furiously. "Now human too? Fuck!" He slumped his shoulders and let out a guttural whine.
Jade relaxed slightly and lowered her bow. "Kar...kat?" she tried. It tasted like honey and daggers the same way his voice did. "Is that your name?"
He rolled his eyes. "Yes. Khaarrkhaet. Why human fucking care?"
Jade gnawed on her lip, looking down at a pebble near her foot. "I...I feel bad about having borrowed your, um, house without permission, especially just to play a stupid prank. But that doesn't change the fact that you stole my harvesting sickles, you asshole!"
Karkat stomped his feet like a child on the verge of a tantrum. His eyes were starting to fill with a watery red. "I no had weapon! Need to defend!"
"Alright, alright," Jade sighed. "You can keep the sickles. But on one very important condition: you grant me unhindered passage over this bridge from here on out. Every time."
This seemed to placate the troll. He relaxed his posture and gave her an uneasy grin, showing off a mouth full of slightly crooked eyeteeth. "Thank you," he growled.
The next bridge was easy enough to cross. Its inhabitants were sound asleep, side by side, their sizes contrasting sharply. Jade had never heard of two trolls living together before, she mused, and this made her realize just how little she truly knew about them when it came down to it.
The blacksmith was sympathetic when Jade explained what had happened, but that didn't stop him from having a quick laugh at her expense. At least he gave her a discount by throwing in a new milk bucket for no extra charge.
By the time Jade reached Karkat's bridge on her way back, it was getting dark. The fading sun danced in a smear or orange and scarlet on the horizon, and she fervently hoped Karkat planned to keep up his end of the bargain.
He was crouched in the mud, trying to weave together a sleeping-basket. 'Trying' being the operative word. He was so focused on the task that the steady stream of grunts and growls and what Jade assumed was cursing that was spilling from his mouth drowned out the sound of her approach. This gave her the chance to observe him for a few precious moments.
Karkat had his tongue stuck out in concentration, a smear of charcoal against his ashen skin. He went to weave one reed behind another, and it snapped. He stared blankly at it for a moment, and then flung the broken reed, flopping onto his back in the mud with a squelch and a long, frustrated groan. Jade failed to suppress a giggle.
He snapped to alertness at the sound, then clawed his way up the side of the bridge. "Human," he whined.
"My name is Jade. You remember our promise, right?"
Karkat nodded. "Djzhaeyd free to cross bridge." He stepped to the side to allow her to pass.
"Thank you." Jade smiled for a moment, and then her mouth twisted into a lopsided frown. "By the way, when you took my sickles, did you also take my milk bucket?"
She couldn't quite read the look on Karkat's face until he rolled his eyes and snorted out a laugh that made him seem so human. "No maeytssprrit, no kiszhmeeyssiss, no need bucket. Ask troll who has..." he paused and drew a four-square grid in the air, "filled. I have no one. No fucking friends, even!"
Jade had no idea what those terms meant, but something in the lines of Karkat's eyes told her he was telling the truth. "Hey, maybe I can be your friend, as long as you can suppress your natural inclinations to be a total asshole."
"Fuck you," Karkat laughed happily. "Yes. Thank you, Djaeyd."
Jade had to admit he did look almost human when he smiled — despite the teeth — and kind of...cute.
★
Karkat was true to his word. Every time Jade crossed his humble bridge — more and more often just for the sake of visiting him — they exchanged increasing friendly greetings, becoming more and more comfortable around each other. As Karkat's English began to improve rapidly (still flavored, Jade was secretly glad of, by his guttural, liquid accent), it became apparent that he was an adept verbal sparring partner who delighted in inventing increasingly unique, colorful, and convoluted manners of insults.
They began to act like an old married couple, poking fun at each other and half-pretending to bicker about silly things, but beneath it all they were very close friends, regardless of the yawning chasm between them. Rumors began to spread about the strange young witch who'd befriended a troll. Jade paid them no mind, or at least tried not to; after all, the attention and curiosity of the local townsfolk brought more business to her humble potion shop.
★
And then one cold winter evening, as Jade was returning home with an armload of firewood, she discovered Karkat huddled up against the side of Jade's cottage, clutching his hand. For a moment, she wondered how he'd found his way here, but there were more pressing concerns to deal with right now.
When the crunching of Jade's footsteps in the thin snow alerted Karkat to her presence, he looked up, hope and sadness mingling in his eyes. "Jade!"
"Karkat, are you alright?" Jade dropped the firewood haphazardly at her feet.
"Some asshole came along," he sighed bitterly. "Wanted to take my bridge. She said which one of us had higher blood could have it. I had no chance!"
"Oh noooo..." Jade frowned sympathetically. "Come on, let's get you inside."
It was obvious by the way Karkat shuffled through the door of Jade's cottage that he felt cripplingly out of place. She ushered him into her cluttered workshop and sat him down on a plain wooden chair. Jade busied herself gathering ointments and bandages while Karkat squirmed, clearly unaccustomed to human furniture.
"Let me see your hand." She shoved a heap of ingredients and scrolls out of the way so she could put the things she needed in a neat pile.
Karkat vehemently refused. He didn't even bother to articulate his refusal in English or even Alternian: he just gave an alarmed hiss and yanked his arm away.
"Come on, Karkat!" Jade huffed. "How the hell am I supposed to heal you if you won't even let me?!"
Cowed, the troll boy gingerly let go of his injured hand and extended it towards her, shutting his eyes as if in anticipation of something painful. There was a nasty gash on his palm that looked like it had only recently stopped bleeding. Jade went straight to work tending the wound, and Karkat opened first one eye, then the other, to look at her quizzically.
When Jade realized he was staring at her, she tilted her head to look at his face, which bore a look of abject confusion. "What?" she asked mildly.
"What, are you going to not say anything about my blood?"
She blinked. "Why would I? It's just normal blood, isn't it?"
Karkat opened and closed his mouth several times as if to speak, but no words came out. There was just a stunned silence and a view of his teeth from a new angle. Finally, as Jade finished fastening the bandage, he said, incredulously, "You really know not one single fucking about trolls, do you?"
Jade put her hands on her hips and narrowed her eyes at him. "And just what do you mean by that?" she huffed.
"Troll power based on different blood colors, purple highest, dark red lowest. And mine's not even on the fucking spectrum! I am lower than dirt! Less authority than a flea on a highblood's filthy dirt-caked ass! So low I would have to climb a mountain of stairs just to be able to see the goddamn nooksucker who is only one rung higher than me!"
The room was engulfed in silence, not the comfortable silence they were familiar with, but the tense, electric silence left in the wake of the confession of a secret.
And then Jade spoke. "Hey, that really, really isn't fair, and I feel bad for you. But how was I supposed to know? Your blood is the exact same color as mine and every single other human's is."
Karkat slowly raised one eyebrow. "Wait, really? You're not just making this up to make me feel better about the pitiful sack of shit that is my life?"
"Yes. Here, look." Jade pulled a small hunting knife out of the pouch on her belt and carefully pricked her finger with it. "...ow. See?"
Karkat grabbed her wrist with his uninjured hand so he could get a closer look. Jade began to think about things she'd been too busy to focus on while she was bandaging his other hand. Karkat's grip was firm but gentle, and his hands were warm and calloused, and he was careful with his sharp yellow claws. He was all angles and leathery skin and sitting like he half expected the chair to suddenly collapse at any moment, and he looked so vulnerable.
Once Karkat was satisfied Jade wasn't trying to trick him with some sort of enchantment, he let go of her wrist. The warmth of his skin faded from hers.
Jade gave a sympathetic half-smile. "C'mon, let's go see if I have any extra blankets."