Chapter Text
Hanahaki disease- Hanahaki-byō;
-(flower-vomiting disease) is a disease characterized by the growth of flowers in the body as a result of unrequited love.
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Love was an intimate feeling to Will, something that he felt deep inside, in his heart, soul and his bones. Love was something Will had never dared to dream of, because his love was different.
Boys are supposed to like girls. He is supposed to like girls. But whenever he looks at one, he doesn't feel anything. Sure, he has platonic feelings for his friends like Max and El, but he could never look at them, or others romantically. No matter how much he wanted to. No matter how disgusted he felt with himself. No matter how much he hated himself.
Will accepted the fact that he was different long ago, back when he was 12 and everyone at school called him a fag( and they still do).
They weren't wrong.
But, theres is one thing he will never get over, his crush. His first love. Mike. His best friend since kindergarten. His first friend. His everything.
Will realised his crush after he came back home, after he was rescued from the Upside Down. He remembers the day like it was yesterday, the memory burning in his brain.
Mike came to his hospital bed and hugged him, his embrace warming Will, making him forget the terror and cold he just experienced in the Upside Down, as if they never happened. The rest of the Party was there too, and sure, Will was more than happy to see them, but Mike's presence was different, more special. It felt like an eternity since he last saw Mike, even though he was missing for just a week. It felt so long since he last felt his touch, and it made Will yearn for it more than usual.
That was when Will realised Mike was different. To him atleast. And he is sure of it because Mike is clearly straight.
Mike has dated El for a year already, and their relationship doesn't seem like its gonna die anytime soon. That was until El dumped Mike.
And rightfully so.
Will knew Mike had been lying to El and he was acting like an asshole to her lately too, but he didn't think they would actually break up. They were practically attached to each other's hip all summer, which resulted in Will kinda getting left out, since Lucas was with Max and Dustin with his so called girlfriend, Suzie, if she even existed.
It's not like Will was jealous or mad, he was happy for his friends, but it sucked being the only miserable one. He was all alone and it sucked.
"All right, then", Mike starts. "I’ll use my torch to set fire to the chambers, sacrificing ourselves, killing the jujus, and saving the Khuisar.
We all live on as heroes in the memories of the Kalamar. Victory. " Lucas and Mike high five each other, relieved the campaign finally ended.
The sight of them ignoring Will and just ending the game in a second hurt. Will's rarely the Dungeon Master( since Mike is most of the time) and he worked hard on the story. He did all of that work for what? For them to just not care? To just ignore him, to go back to their stupid plan of getting El back? El didn't even want Mike back! She dumped his ass!
"Okay. Fine." Will' s voice comes louder than usual, his stomach sinking as the words come out of his mouth.
"You guys won. Congratulations. " He launches his wizard costume off, throwing it on the floor. This is so stupid.
"Will, I was just messing around!" Mike attempts to comfort Will, regretting his abrupt way of finishing the campaign. Memories of Will insisting all day to play DnD come to his mind, reminding him how much Will wanted this. How he just wanted to play with his friends. He didn't mean it like that. He didn't mean to hurt Will.
"Hey let's finish for real. How much longer is the campaign-"
"Just forget it Mike!" He snaps. Will never raises his voice, he was always the quieter one of the group.
Mike panics as Will starts shoving his things into his backpack. He messed up, he didn't mean to, he was just sour from El dumping him, he didn't mean to take it out on Will.
"No! You want to keep playing, right??" he tries again, asking Lucas for support. The boy nods and tries to help him "Y-Yeah! Totally!"
"We'll just call the girls afterwards-"
" I said FORGET IT, Mike! Okay?!" Will turns fully, basically screaming at the boys, his face red and eyes puffy. He looked like he was moments away from breaking down.
The sight was burning Mike's eyes. He'd never seen his best friend like this, ever. Not when he was being bullied by Troy, not even when he came to school after being hurt by Loonie. It struck Mike's chest deeply, sending an agonising pain to it. He never wanted Will to feel and look like this, let alone be the cause of it.
As if that wasn't enough, Will's next words felt like salt on his wounds. "Im going home."
No. No he couldn't let him. Mike needed to apologise, and fast.
Lucas is sitting at the front of the stairs, blocking the exit, Will doesn't think twice and pushes through him. "Move!" , he shoves, stomping on the stairs, leaving.
Mike doesn't wait and starts chasing after Will into the garage, his mind already thinking of millions of ways to apologise, ways to make him feel better. He always hated seeing Will hurt, but ever since he went missing in the 83's, it's unbearable. It hurts differently when Dustin or Lucas get mad at him, even El. Most of the time he doesn't even care and he wants them to apologise, not the other way around. But this is Will, and he can't afford losing him again.
"Will, come on, you cant leave! It's raining!" It was infact pouring outside and Will didn't have a coat or anything on the matter. He wore a pair red shorts and a white shirt with short sleeves. If he went home now he would end up drenched in rain and cold. And Will hates the cold, because It likes the cold.
"Listen, I said I was sorry, all right. It’s a cool campaign-really cool. We’re just…not in the mood right now-”
Will spins around and yells again: "YEAH MIKE THATS THE PROBLEM! YOU GUYS ARE NEVER IN THE MOOD ANYMORE!" Mike flinches at the volume, but most importantly at his face. Tears are violently pouring from Will's eyes and his expression looks so hurt it makes Mike sick.
"You're ruining our party!" Will says again, softer, but with the same anger from before.
"That's not true!" Mike manages to spit out despite his initial shock.
With a glare in his eyes, not threatening but angry, Will responds fast, not letting the boy infront of him speak again.
"Really? Where’s Dustin right now?"
Mike opens his mouth to say something but stops. He can't think of anything. He hadn't spoken to Dustin ever since he left with El to go to Hopp's cabin and.. make out.
The last words make Mike shudder. He opens his mouth once again to try and apologise, but Will cuts him before he can.
"See? You don’t know and you don’t even care!
And obviously he doesn’t either and I don’t blame him!" Will's yelling gets louder again. Shame is starting to stir at Mike's stomach.
"YOU'RE DESTROYING EVERYTHING, AND FOR WHAT? SO YOU CAN SWAP SPIT WITH SOME STUPID GIRL?!" Will's voice breaks at the end. He sounds exhausted and looks like he's in pain.
At those words, Mike feels called out, for some reason. It's weird because everyone knows him and El are dating, it's not like it's a secret. And yet he feels exposed. It's not just kissing El, he loves her, he really does. Even though he cant tell her "I love you", and sometimes the thought of kissing her makes him sick, he cares. He really cares for her and Will doesn't know what he's talking about.
"El's not stupid!" he shouts.
"It's not my fault you don't like girls!"
The words slap Will in the face, making him flinch. So does Mike. He didn't mean it. He didn't mean to say that. Why does he always mess things up? What's wrong with him?
In a bad attempt to make things better, Mike continues: "I’m not trying to be a jerk. Okay?
But we’re not kids anymore." He exhales sharply.
"I m-mean, what did you think, really? That we were never gonna get girlfriends?
That we were just gonna sit in my basement all day and play games for the rest of our lives?"
He tries his best to speak in a soft voice, the usual voice he uses when speaking to Will. Mike oddly remembers the reason he started speaking that way with him.
It started when Will came to school with a bruised eye and quieter than usual. He didn't need Will telling him what happened, he knew Loonie, that piece of shit, did it. Will was scared and Mike wanted to comfort him so spoke in the most quiet and soft voice he could come with. It surprisingly worked and Will did felt better, which weirdly enough, made Mike feel proud of himself. He felt like nothing could get between them, ever.
And now, Mike is the reason for Will's pain.
"Yeah" Will's voice is low, like a mumble, barely hearable. Like he can't control his emotions anymore. "I guess I did. I really did."
His voice finally crumbles, tears starting to fall uncontrollably.
His tone, the way Will said the last words, they felt different. Like he was talking about something else completely. Like he was disappointed in something, or someone.
Sniffling violently, Will turns and pulls his bike close, "-Will!" Mike pleads but Will doesn't care.
He gets on the bike and starts pedalling, faster and faster, ignoring Mike's shouts and the pouring rain. He just wants to be alone. And its funny, because he wished he wasn't alone all summer.
As Will biked into the rain, he started to feel a pain in his chest. It was sudden and before he realised, he started coughing. The pain was getting worse and worse to the point Will had stop in the in the middle of the road to cough properly.
As he lifted his hand to his mouth, he felt something stuck in his throat. He coughed harder and finally managed to get it out. He lowers his hand and frowned at the sight unfolding in front of him.
A small flower petal lays in his palm, covered in tiny trinkets of blood.
A Dicentra petal.
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Dicentra -Bleeding Heart: The distinctive heart-shaped flower with a dangling drop symbolises heartbreak, loss, and the sadness that comes from unrequited love or lost love.