Work Text:
Nightmare was dead.
His brother was dead.
It didn't feel real. Nothing could have made it feel real but the reality of how he died already made him feel.....uneasy. He didn't know how else to describe it.
He wasn't mad or even upset with Berry, far from it. He loved that kid and they did what they had to do. However, at the end of the day he thought he'd be the one to end his life. It was generally expected. Would there be the hope that he could save Nightmare? Yes. Always, no matter how small it was there. He never gave up on his brother.
But he had become more and more aware over the years.....he'd likely be the one to kill him. And that didn't happen. There was no conclusion to a centuries-long feud. No showdown. No closure. No goodbye to his first friend and first enemy.
Just injuries and a mess to clean up. Someone to bury. Someone to mourn. Another burden for him to carry.
A service was held though not much attended, he saw Aliza again. Ink was there. Blue showed up with Berry, though it's clear the kid only came to see Aliza again and they did not stay. His title of guardian of negativity and positivity all official.
Things didn't get easier.
To maintain a balance of both good and bad emotions was....taxing. Dream used to be able to enjoy a room full of people in a good mood, but now it can never be "too happy". And of course too much negativity overwhelms him but now he needs to maintain it. Already frustrating. But the problems seem to grow.
Nightmare's death offered a power vacuum of sorts, so many people popped up to be the big bad of the multiverse. None of them was on the same threat level as his departed brother but there being so many of them was taxing. Guess if there was one good thing Nightmare did it was keep lower-level threats silent (supposedly to avoid risking his wrath).
It was so frustrating. Why were so many bastards so god damn greedy? Why can't they be happy with what they had? Why must they continue this domino effect? Why does one bad thing just cause an even worse one to happen?
He kept it up. He didn't complain. He kept working. It was his mission to make others happy. Nothing should be able to stop him now....
The bad sanses were gone, which was alarmingly but as it stood they were always more harmless as individuals than as a group. Even Dream knew not all of them were working for the man willingly. Which was a blessing
Those four and all the new faces popping up? He wouldn't be able to handle it.
Barely getting enough sleep as is.
You're not happy. You don't feel happy. You haven't felt happy in days. You can't lie. Not even to yourself. Though you sure are trying to aren't you? Maybe you and Nightmare aren't so different after all. Do you enjoy deceiving people?
A tree had started to grow....right where Nightmare or what remained of him was buried. Dream barely recognized what could be called Nightmare's corpse, a pile of broken bones and black goop. It was a ghastly sight and a realization that Berry, the pacifist who saved the world while showing nothing but mercy, had did it...
Blue did say it was done in an act of blind protective rage and Dream reasoned whatever Berry had to do to kill him would naturally be intense but still.
They were just a child.
He tended to the tree, watering it, ensuring it's growth. As days faded into months, it grew quite a lot. And as it grew....well, Dream would recognize it anywhere.
A tree of feelings.
Right back to the beginning.
Dream had humored regrowing it before all this happened, if he could find a way. But he naturally welcomed it now, both because it eased some of the weight he felt as guardian of all emotions now.....and because it allowed him to reflect.
On simpler times. Happier times. Though now that he thinks about it....he hadn't been happy back then either. Had he? Not truly.
Your whole life is a joke. The positive guardian yet you stumble into tragedy after tragedy. You try so hard to do good yet it always bites you in the ass and you still keep at it. Why? What's wrong with you? You can't do anything right. Can't even exist properly, can you?
He had seen Blue less. He had seen Ink less. It felt like normally when people talked to him it was to complain or demand something and if not that they were a bringer of bad news. He felt....strangely alone. The added grief of Nightmare just added to it.
Looking back, eyes scanning through the threes now long and luxurious branches. As the new tree of feelings grew proper he'd sit underneath it. Just to relax and breathe. Enjoy what time he could get to himself.
Looking back...it was always supposed to be him and Nightmare. Wasn't it? They were told they would always have each other. They always had each other then Nightmare...hurt him. And now Nightmare left.
Things should have never ended up this way. Like this. When he and Nightmare were at war it made it easy to forget a lot of the finer details, now that Nightmare was gone and he has no choice but to mourn not only his brother....but the childhood he lost, the years he had suffered, and forced to confront the unfairness of it all.
Sometimes he'd cry. Sometimes he'd just stare blankly at nothing. Sometimes all he could feel was nothing....
He couldn't go on like this.
Blue joked that Dream would struggle as the guardian of negativity but the opposite was true. Negative emotions were something fierce. So easy to be consumed by.
Was this how he felt back then? Did bad things naturally feel even worse than they already were to Nightmare?
Dream laid back on the grass. He never went to the negative side of the tree. Wouldn't. Couldn't. Refuse to even humor it.
Those damn black apples caused enough trouble.
Frantically the bitter side that he was currently developing wished he could destroy it altogether.
Then....an apple fell. Incidental. A single golden apple landed beside him. Dream looking up. Seems a strong wind knocked it down. Dream looking at the fruit....he knew what would happen if he ate from the other side of the tree....but this one?
He lifted up the golden fruit, overlooking carefully. Reasonably he knows he shouldn't but at the same time he is curious and furthermore....desperate. No one else can do this and he can't do this is he's miserable all the damn time. Being the guardian of all emotions meant all of them, but positive ones especially. It was his whole thing. What people needed him for. What he needed.
Who was he if he wasn't happy? Who was he if he wasn't useful?
Besides, this was the good side of the tree right? Nothing bad could come from positive emotions? Negative feelings always corrupted and inspired something bad, but positivity? How bad could it be?
It was a small bite. Barely noticeable. The fruit tasted like an apple despite it's odd appearance but blazing with warmth and an odd sweetness. It invoked a fuzzy feeling. And Dream was able to smile again.
But of course, he was careful. He knew this could still be dangerous. Besides, one bite was all he needed to feel like himself again.
Soon, it'd be another bite. Then another. Then another. Anytime the sadness was overwhelming he'd take another bite. It would work and it would be forgotten. The apple never rotted, stayed just as fresh as the first bite. Feeling giddy as a calm anytime he ate another piece.
This was truly the perfect solution to his problem. He could feel joy again. And things passed by earlier and the positive apples offered no corruption aside from a mild burn in his chest but it was fine. It was all fine.
It took him a whole year to consume one apple. He would then pick another. Then another, that burn in his chest growing but Dream simply adjusted to it. Found it pleasant even.
What was the harm? He needed to be happy.