Chapter Text
How many days has it been? How many years? I spend a lot of time in the wilderness, so I lose track of the date.
Sitting under a tree, in a forest in…Washington, maybe?
Most of the time, I don’t like to think about the future, or the past, or me in general. I prefer to think about where I’m going to get my next meal, and how to survive the next few days. But today, I find myself considering who I am. Specifically, who I was then and who I am now.
I pick up a stick, and draw in the dirt.
Evan then
-A bit naive
-Could focus without too much trouble
-Good liar
-Creative
-Wanted to find out as much as he could about everything
Evan now
-Cautious
-Nervous and has trouble focusing
-Good liar (not that he has much practice)
-Makes a plan
-Doesn’t think past his next meal
I’m different now. But if I think about the past too much, I start to feel lonely.
I miss them. Astrid and Arden, Rani, Mae, and Marcy. I even miss him sometimes.
It’s not like I’ve never talked to anyone since…but I have to make them forget. It’s better if they forget. Better for them, and better for me.
I can’t really remember much before the apocalypse. It’s fuzzy. I must have had parents…I must have..
That’s enough.
I stand up abruptly.
You need to quit focusing on the past and focus on where you’re going to get your next meal.
That means finding a town. People are everywhere, which is something I used to hate. I still hate it, as a matter of fact. But at least there’ll be food.
I scuff out the lists I made in the dirt with my foot.
Doesn’t really matter who I am. Not anymore.