Chapter Text
It was completely dark, both outside, and inside. Only the white light of the moon illuminated the room I was in, the god rays falling on my feet. I was half-lying-half-sitting on a rusty bed, the waves of plain sky blue bedsheet erratically covering me. Next to me was a small night stand, with a flower in a vase. I squinted my eyes to try to identify it… It must have been a Daffodils. Whoever brought it, made quite a unique choice. Suddenly I heard a noise as if someone dropped a lot of sand on the floor. Then they appeared. Exactly as planned, or rather, as they planned.
“Did he come, Oge?” the shadowy figure raised their eyebrows. If you could call them that.
I couldn’t withstand the intense glare of theirs, so I focused even harder on the white flower. It seemed to be withering. How long has it been there?
“No, Di…” my lip trembled for a second “He did not…”
Di didn’t seem surprised by that. Maybe they were slightly disappointed? It was hard to say. Their only facial features were those yellow eyes of theirs. Suddenly they raised their head.
“Do you want me to perhaps…” Di began but quickly stopped
Before they even finished, Di climbed on my bed and straddled me - of course I couldn’t feel that by weight, I only could see that. I blinked. When I opened my eyes, I saw him in front of me. His facial expression was somewhere between boredom and sternness, hair ruffled and he was naked. Well vaguely so - it seems Di couldn’t make out some of his features since I never saw him naked. The other inaccuracy was that their eyes were yellow.
“Well I can’t copy that, either” Di squeezed their eyes “You always I avoid their gaze.”
Slowly, but surely Di closed the distance between my face, and theirs. Their gaze however wasn’t lusty, but… perhaps a bit saddened. That it came to that.
“Wa-” I squeaked but before I could finish…
We were already kissing. If you could call that that. I barely felt anything. And neither did I know how to kiss, so Di was searching where to put their tongue in my awkward mouth. Making an expression while doing that, that he wouldn’t do… Finally after a minute of that charade, they pulled away, a bit of drool coming out of a corner of their mouth, that tear of saliva revealing their shadowy skin again - it seems his face was a makeup on Di in away.
“That didn’t help” Di said very matter of factly
“It didn’t” I said factly of matter
For a while we stayed silent. In moments like these, a clock ticking would be a blessing. At that moment I only heard my breathing, ragged and shallow. I guess it was getting worse after all…
“While, uh, ‘kissing’” Di cleared their throat “I saw it - it really is getting worse”
A smile appeared on my face at that moment. Not a happy one, a rather weary one.
“...How long?” I muttered
“Depends… On TMZ maybe a month, but if they switch to Nitroso-” Di was about to go on a long tirade when they looked at me
At that moment I could only tear up. I already knew all that, one month or two didn’t matter at this point. I was still bound to that room at the end of the day. But I wanted to see him, and with each shortening, it was less and less possible.
“There… there…” Di was caressing my head
At that point they were almost fully back to their original shadowy figure again. After a while they stopped patting my head, and slowly headed to the exit.
“...You chose quite a nasty Master, Oge” Di said it in a very careful way, like a peasant talking to a king “Is it even worth it? All this?”
They pointed to their lips with one arm and with the other to the last remnants of their previous transformation.
“...All this…” Di’s voice cracked “...Waiting…?”
I contemplated my words for a while. Indeed Di was right - It wasn’t worth it, one bit.
“ ‘Life’ without waiting for something is pointless” I said, straining each word, each syllable “What else is there left for me”
Di looked at me now with pity. Endless pity. As if they knew what I would say before I had said it.
“I wish that was the case.” They opened the doors to the room preparing to leave “But I’m afraid it’s not.”
We stayed silent. They knew I had one last question.
“When is Repus coming?” I asked, almost non-challantly
“I think at this point Repus is gone” Di was already half-way through the door frame “That’s how far gone you are”
After saying that, they left. Again, I was left completely to my own devices. Well, as if I had them. I considered falling asleep, but a month… I shook my head, quickly stopping because of a sharp snap of pain. Ultimately I chose to chase wakefulness. Maybe at night he will come. Just maybe.