Chapter Text
It was getting really hot outside.
Etho savored the cool mornings when dew was still clinging to the grass, knowing he had to go out and bake for a hours in the sun at whatever job he'd managed to scrounge up. At the very least, shifts were cut down a few hours to compensate. Occasionally, if it was too hot, he'd be told to come back in the evening.
Having to avoid heat stroke was a new experience that Etho was still working on. He was, without a doubt, the pastiest person working these labor jobs, never having lived in this kind of climate. A fellow work-hand usually took pity and gifted him a comically large straw hat to wear in the sun, and while he sort of hated it.. it did help shield him from burning to a crisp.
(Bdubs had been begging him to buy some lotion at the market for his peeling skin, but they were still fighting that particular battle out.)
Needless to say, the afternoon sun was becoming the bane of Etho's existence. The texture of his layering sunburns was driving him nuts. But the mornings spent outside, keeping himself in shape.. well, they were almost a decent compromise.
Bdubs either stayed asleep when Etho got up, or he tiredly pulled himself out of bed to sit on the crumbling cobblestone steps leading up to the door and watched until he got bored.
Sometimes, sometimes - more often than not - he'd join Etho after awhile, in a way. Exercise, in the mornings, you know. Good for them.
This particular morning, Bdubs didn't stir at all when Etho got up. He'd woken them both by absolutely howling last night, caught in a nightmare, sending ice through every nerve in Etho's body.
He thought.. they'd be getting better at this point. But for some reason, it only seemed to be worse now that Bdubs had a routine and was settled into their meager home. It bothered Etho to no end, having this problem that he didn't know how to solve until Bdubs was crying into his chest late at night.
(Etho, of course, had nightmares too. Sleeping soundly was never a guarantee with him, especially after he'd left the army. But the difference was how he rarely stayed trapped in them like Bdubs did, his mind throwing him into consciousness at the first sign of danger. He woke up without a single noise escaping from his throat.
Bdubs rarely - if ever - noticed.)
Etho sighed to himself as he stretched. The sun had started creeping higher, sending light through the forest canopy. Patterns spilled out over the ground in front of him, mixed with decaying leaves and patches of grass. Distantly, he heard the sound of Bdubs in the kitchen- metal scraping the stovetop, dishes clanking together. It was nice. Just him and Bdubs, taking care of each other, no schedules or eyes to avoid, no pressure..
Like a rock through a glass pane, Etho was abruptly thrown out of his moment of peace.
He heard the most terrifying noise possible. Bdubs yelling- because he was scared, something was wrong, something in the daylight had come into their space and—
Etho was in the house in what felt like an instant.
Bdubs was clutching his chest, and without thinking Etho was moving in front of his prince to confront—
"-Oh shoot, Etho, wait," Bdubs carefully put his hands on Etho's shoulders, sounding tense but not hurt. Etho tried not to flinch away as his eyes danced around, looking for the danger.
"Hang on, it's fine! I just got spooked, there was a stupid mouse and-"
Bdubs felt more than a little guilty (and strangely flattered) about setting Etho off in the middle of what was shaping up to be a peaceful morning, getting the guy to come running and 'save' him like this.
It wasn't good for either of them. The very last thing Bdubs wanted was to throw Etho into the mindset he'd been in just a month or so ago— pushing him back into that familiar dynamic of throwing himself in front of hypothetical swords.
He didn't acknowledge it, neither of them did, but Bdubs knew that Etho was rattled easily. Some part of the man was clearly never able to let his guard down. Even out in the middle of nowhere with nothing but each other, doing something terribly domestic with Bdubs, he was like a bowstring waiting to be pulled back and shot.
(And course Bdubs knew that there could still be real danger threatening his life, something else he needed to be saved from. He'd been through so much and if he thought about it too much he quickly turned into a nervous wreck, because he just hadn't seen it coming, and he trusted people he shouldn't have, walked himself into his own would-be assassination, and-
And this whole thing somehow still seemed like Bdubs' fault.
But at the same time, he felt.. oddly apathetic about it all. He'd spent so long being scared, and it was exhausting. These days, Bdubs just tried not to think about it as much as possible. What was there to gain by thinking in circles, over and over, being obsessive? He was safe here with Etho!)
"..A mouse." Etho repeated, his shoulders slowly lowering.
"Listen, it jumped right out at me from under the flour sack. It lunged, Etho! You would'a been scared too!" Bdubs blustered, running his hands up and down Etho's toned upper arms.
Etho turned around and raised his eyebrows judgingly, not particularly pleased with the situation.
"Sorry- M'sorry, sweetie. So sorry." Bdubs admitted, grabbing Etho's hands. "Didn't mean to freak you out or nothin'. I'm fine."
Etho let out a heave of a sigh, perhaps to let out tension, perhaps to lighten the mood.
"Ohh, Bdubs." He said airily, "What am I gonna do with you?"
"One million kisses." Bdubs decided. "And maybe find some mouse traps while you're out shopping."
"Hard bargain." Etho noted. Bdubs tilted his head and rocked up onto his toes, earning a kiss from his boyfriend. All was right in the world, actually! Things were great, lunging mice and all. It was just him and Etho against the world, roughing it out in the woods together, and their lives were better than ever.
Etho didn't even have to go to work today, so they could hang out and repair things and get up to other activities they indulged in when they had the spare time. Bdubs loved these days spent at Etho's side. His partner had to head out to the market to grab a few things, but then it was Etho and Bdubs time.
Which is to say, the best time.
After they ate a decent-ish breakfast, Etho prepared to go out. Despite the scare, he was in a good mood, and was smiling at something weird Bdubs said on his way out the door to saddle up Climb. Bdubs grinned at his backside - for more than one reason - and turned to start clearing the table.
Dishes, done. Laundry? Sheets and clothes were tossed into a pile by the door, ready to be washed. Beyond that there wasn't much to do until Etho came back, so Bdubs decided to take advantage of the rest of the morning by heading outside with the supplies Doc had oh-so-not-graciously delivered to him yesterday.
And so, not more than an hour later - much faster than expected - Bdubs heard the sound of hooves hitting dirt while he was on his knees planting delicate seeds in a bed of tilled dirt.
"E-thooo!" Bdubs boomed in a loud, deep voice as rider and horse approached, dusting off his dirty hands. He stood up, singing out, "There he is, it's E-thooo!"
Sure, it'd only been an hour or so without the guy- but could you really blame Bdubs for being moved to song at the sight of his favorite person coming up the front path? He'd spent too long hiding his big Etho-based feelings to shove them all back in a box now. The Etho greeting anthem was practically tradition at this point.
Now, normally, Etho would think the fanfare was both funny and ridiculous. But right now his face was blank, shoulders curled in and back hunched like he was making himself smaller.
"Hey, sweetie!" Bdubs continued brightly, pulling himself to smile. "Didja-…"
Only the most astute of Etho scholars would notice how off his whole demeanor was.
To Bdubs, it all screamed that something was wrong.
So his voice dipped, face falling. "Hey, hey- what's happening here?"
There was no answer, his partner's eyes cast towards the dirt.
What was there to say? Etho couldn't even begin to pull his thoughts into words as he dismounted, going through the motions of unloading saddle bags and offering various sacks of groceries for Bdubs to take inside.
"E," Bdubs said, concerned. But he seemed to realize there was nothing to be done about it just yet, no way would Etho just open up, so he let his arms be loaded up with foodstuffs and headed inside to put things on the table.
There were ingredients to bake with and a new whisk. Despite the worry, Bdubs' face lightened up as he noticed Etho had gotten everything he'd asked for.
"This is going to be perfect." Bdubs decided. Then, he had another excellent idea. "Hey, do you want to help me cook? Go put Climb back and you can help me, okay?"
"I mean.." Etho didn't look thrilled at the idea. He didn't look thrilled about anything, his gaze unwilling to settle on anything for too long.
"Please? I think it'll be fun!" Bdubs replied, getting into his line of vision and widening his eyes slightly. "I can do it myself, but, you know- I want the help. Please?"
Etho sighed through his nose, his expression softening at Bdubs' pleading (what had Doc called it, again? The 'big, stupid eye thing'?). It was a losing battle.
"..Better than being out in the heat."
Etho took a moment to himself when he was in the lean-to with the horses. He needed a few minutes to think, to pull himself together.
Clearly, Bdubs had noticed something was wrong, and he was curious like he always was. But this really, really didn't involve the other man. Worse, trying to explain what had happened would be embarrassing and pathetic. Bdubs wouldn't be mean about it or anything, but his earlier fumble didn't paint Etho in the best light.
No. There was nothing to say.
Nothing to be done.
He was an idiot, plain and simple. Etho had taken a shot and missed. What else could be said? All that was left was to put it out of his mind and move on.
It was fine, really. He had Bdubs. He wasn't desperate for a social life or friends, even if- even if he was beyond curious. Even if being snubbed by this one person was twisting him up on the inside like a rag being wrung out.
Move on, Etho. Just move on.
Letting out a weary sigh to himself, Etho left the horses and went back into the house to watch Bdubs squint at a recipe in a book.
"I saw it again while you were out," Bdubs told Etho while he lined up ingredients on the counter, "That stupid freaking mouse, scampering down the steps."
"Did you scream again?" Etho asked, his voice dry.
"Wh- no! I was very- I was very strong and manly and composed about it, thank you!" Bdubs huffed and griped, not fond of the memory.
"I can catch it later?" Etho offered.
"I'd love to know how," Bdubs said doubtfully.
"How hard could it be?" Etho replied, shrugging. His eyes were still shuttered and far away. "Are you cracking these eggs or is it me?"
"You can get your hands goopy, I'm gonna measure stuff." Bdubs decided, their shoulders brushing together as he reached over for sugar. "And then can you handle the oven and.. coals and whatever? It needs to be- well, here, the book explains how hot—"
They worked together, absently chatting and bothering the other as they slowly pulled together what Etho eventually figured out was a cake. His first thought was that this was far from the best use of their money and resources.
His second thought was that if Bdubs really wanted it.. Etho couldn't begrudge him a treat once in awhile, okay? Not after the kind of life he'd left, and what led to him leaving it. If this satisfied Bdubs' need for luxury, Etho wasn't about to complain.
(He was still living with the knowledge that this wouldn't last, that Bdubs would go back eventually. Nothing about this life or relationship was sustainable. It sat like a pit in his stomach, everything else in this life they'd built shaped around the small fact that Bdubs couldn't last in these conditions.)
"And once this is in the oven, I'm gonna start chopping up fruit, and it's gonna be so good. You'll see." Bdubs warned, absently tilting his head to bump it against Etho's shoulder. "Just you wait."
"I never said—" Etho laughed a little, "I never doubted your cake-making ability, Bdubs. Even you can't ruin a step-by-step process."
Bdubs puffed up with outrage in an instant. "Oh, oh, okay- and just what is that supposed to mean, huh?"
"It just means," Etho was smiling behind his mask, the fabric dusted with flour as he leaned down to stoke the coals, "You've got a lot of talents, Bdubs—"
"And?"
"And this one is- you're working on it, that's okay-"
"Oh! So it's like that, huh? I see how it is—"
They bickered harmlessly while Bdubs mixed in the milk, sloshing some on the counter as he wasn't quite paying attention. ("Is that an egg shell in there? Do I see shell, mister 'judging the maker of his home cooked meals' guy?")
Minutes later, Bdubs was carefully pouring batter into a pan. He paused halfway through.
"..I was supposed to grease that." The smaller man noted. Etho started chuckling at the look on his face - Moss, did he adore that sound - so Bdubs just dumped the rest in with a scowl.
"Whatever. It's fine! It'll be fine."
It was sort of fine.
They bothered each other and cleaned while they waited on it to bake. Bdubs peeked inside every now and then to frown and hum. Etho went out to pump water and came back to silently wash dishes, his expression and posture wilted like earlier until Bdubs bullied him into aimless chatter again.
He would kill to know what was wrong with Etho. What could have possibly gotten him so out of sorts, so- so sad? What happened at that market?
And how did Bdubs pry that information out of him? Was it even a good idea?
Eventually, after what felt like forever, Bdubs declared the cake to be ready. He opened the oven door and reached forward a few inches, abruptly pausing.
"How," He said, feeling pretty stupid in that moment, "How do we get it out?"
"Oh, uh." Etho tilted his head. "Tango usually had these big gloves. We can.. uh…"
Towels, is what they decided. They had towels. Etho volunteered himself - without Bdubs' input - for the task of trying not to burn himself as he wrapped each end of the towel around his hands and leaned down to pull the dish out.
"Should- should I put it on the counter top?" He asked dubiously, "Would it burn?"
"No, no, just stick it right back on the stove."
And, well, Bdubs decided it was basically a cake. It was sagging in the middle, but the edges were a golden brown and it smelled incredible.
"Alright, now let's try and jimmy it out of the— actually, screw that. Why bother plating the darn thing?" Bdubs decided, going to grab spoons. He held one out to Etho with a smile before he dumped a bowl of cut fruit right on top of the dish.
"So uncivilized, Booker." Etho commented. Bdubs snorted and shoved at his shoulder.
"You try it first, okay? It's for you, anyways." Bdubs told him, bracing a hip on the counter.
Etho paused, stupidly holding his spoon up in the air mid-reach. "What? Seriously?"
"Yes." Bdubs smirked proudly, crossing his arms.
He'd tricked Etho into helping him do something kind for him?
"You get so busy, working your hands to the bone providin' for us— of course I wanted to bake for you." Bdubs continued. "You deserve it. It's been way too long since you had somethin' sweet!"
Etho didn't know how to feel, let alone respond to this. Bdubs remembered that he liked sweets and went the extra mile to find a recipe, sent Etho out for the ingredients, and then got him to help bake his own gift.
"It's like.. that's how it all started, right? You and me and sugar." Bdubs added in the silence, his voice a little less bombastic now, like he felt shy. He nudged Etho and said, "You tasted like sugar when we kissed that first time."
"Oh." The sound fell from Etho's mouth. "Yeah. Yeah, that's- yeah."
Unsure of what else to say, Etho sighed and tugged down his mask, the smallest of smiles tugging at the corner of his mouth. Bdubs noticed it immediately and grinned.
"You're so weird," Etho decided, not knowing what else to say, eyebrows creasing.
"You like it. And you needed something to do." Bdubs added smugly, now thoroughly affirmed and yet again convinced this was his best idea to date.
"Mmm." Etho's eyes dipped to the ground, the reality of his day creeping back in.
At least it felt.. less.
"I have another big idea. C'mere-" Bdubs moved forward and wrapped his arms around him in a tight hug.
Etho sighed. When the hug didn't end after a few seconds, he let himself sink forward and tilted his head against Bdubs', leaning in just a little.
"Sorry you're havin' a rough day, baby." Bdubs mumbled.
"It's fine." Etho replied mutely. "I'll get over it."
"Doesn't mean you can't wallow for awhile. It's good for you, alright? It's part of the process. So says I, anyways, and I know everything."
Etho held him just a little bit tighter, not feeling up to taking the obvious bait to try and rag on the other man. It was a moment of wallowing, just a little.
Wallowing with good company.
At least he had this. At least, for now, Etho was allowed to indulge in this. In Bdubs. In fact, the more he indulged, the happier Bdubs seemed to be.
He didn't need anyone else.
Etho still felt shame, going through that one moment over and over. Realizing how insignificant he was, how he was really just a small, brief moment not worth remembering.
"..I just kinda fade into the background, huh." Etho noted quietly, his voice rough.
He knew that abstractly, but it had never bothered him before. There was safety in it, being totally irrelevant to the rest of the world. Etho was always content with never being notable, never being something worth seeing. It made his life and his job easier in so many ways.
But in this one specific way, it was eating at him like a dog with a bone.
"No." Bdubs said, vehement, surprising Etho with how serious and urgent he sounded. "I saw you. You were worth looking at."
"And now.."
"Stunning." Bdubs replied immediately, knowing what he was referring to. "Now you're even more rugged and sexy than you used to be."
He gently swayed Etho side to side when he didn't respond. On a whim, Bdubs suggested, "Talk to me?"
They both knew it wouldn't be that simple. Etho just didn't know how to pull together the words.
"It's nothing." Etho mumbled, unease curling around him just thinking of recounting what had happened.
It was sad. And it was embarrassing.
Bdubs was somebody. Everyone who knew him loved him. Even before Etho had ever laid eyes on the man, his coworkers talked about Bdubs being funny, Bdubs being kind, Bdubs being the best of them. He didn't know what it was like to be a background character, to be unimportant enough to be forgotten.
And so Etho cringed at the idea of opening up about it, about how the rest of the world was always content to pass him by. Bdubs always seemed to see something in him, something worth keeping around.
Dampening that spark with reality was the last thing Etho wanted to do right now.
"Y'know, there's never been anyone like you in the history of ever." Bdubs told him quietly, so much affection in his voice that it almost made Etho pull away. It was hard, letting Bdubs be so intense about him. Overwhelming. Like looking into the sun.
"That makes you— rare, and precious and stuff." Bdubs added.
"Are we gonna eat this cake or what?" Etho asked abruptly, very clearly trying to weasel out of acknowledging the compliment. Bdubs laughed in his ear and pulled away.
And, well, the cake was good! Even if the middle wasn't quite done and they ate around it, spoons bumping together with small clinks, shoulders and hips nudging each other.
"And what do we say?" Bdubs prompted after Etho had had his fill, smiling smugly at him.
"..It's good?" Etho replied dubiously.
"Try again."
Etho's eyebrows knitted together, opening his mouth to reply—
And then he dropped his spoon and braced a hand on the counter. His breath came out in a pained shudder, turning away from Bdubs even though the man had seen this happen time and time again.
"Shit," Bdubs mumbled, "Hang on, just hang on—"
He all-but darted the few feet to the cupboard where they kept toiletries and such. After moments just like this, Bdubs had badgered him into putting the painkilling potions into a more accessible space. He snatched a vial up and was by Etho's side in seconds, uncorking it for him.
Gone were the days where Etho would let him really help, let Bdubs brace his head and coax him into taking it. He clearly felt some sort of need to hide away when he got like this. So Etho did the hard work himself, bringing a hand up to massage the bad side of his jaw until he could part his teeth and swallow the medicine.
Bdubs had worked out that Etho didn't really like being touched when he was in pain, too swamped by what he described as lightning running through his entire face. So he simply stood there and listened to Etho breathe and try his hardest not to make any pained sounds, his knuckles white with how hard he was gripping his fists.
"..There ya go." Bdubs murmured as Etho slowly, muscle by muscle, started to relax. He opened and closed his jaw a few times, his expression flat and unhappy.
He'd also gathered that Etho didn't really want to talk after these episodes.
There had been a lot of learning over the past few weeks, living in each other's personal space. Etho clearly tried not to be distant, but some days the space was important.
So Bdubs started tidying up while Etho pulled himself back together, muttering harmless, stupid things to himself that didn't require a response.
Later, he'd do laundry while Etho washed the horses. They'd watch the stupid ungrateful animals roll around in the dirt to ruin all their hard work, and Etho would laugh and laugh like he always did.
Then, like clockwork, they'd fall into bed (sometimes they'd fall into the couch, sometimes the kitchen table, the floor… but keeping it simple worked too). They would thoroughly enjoy each other's company.
Then Bdubs would take his place with his head on Etho's chest, warm and more content than he'd ever been in his life, and they'd sleep.
The morning, thankfully, was peaceful. Etho seemed more at peace than he was yesterday. Bdubs sat on the steps and drank tea while the other man stretched and moved his body, thoroughly enjoying the show but deciding to refrain from cat-calling for the day.
Breakfast was simple and they kicked each other under the table as Bdubs stole bites from Etho's plate, just because he could, and they argued about absolutely nothing while Etho got ready for work.
"I'm just saying, it'd take- five minutes, tops. Two minutes. A bit of lotion, I pin your hair up for the hat, and you're out the door. Easy. I'd do all of it! We'd do it, even- I bet Mumbo would drop dead if he found out I haven't been moisturizing every day, y'know? We could have a- a morning routine."
"Bdubs," Etho said like he was gathering all the patience in the world. "It's- there are other things we could be spending money on, things that are more important—"
"This is important!" Bdubs complained, "You're peelin' all over the place! Pretty soon there won't be layers left to peel!"
"Bdubs." Etho insisted, staring him down.
Bdubs huffed, knowing the argument was over for the time being. Oh, but they'd be back to it.
"Fine! Fine. At least lemme braid your hair, boy." Bdubs instructed, and so Etho gently rolled his eyes and deposited himself in a chair.
Now, Bdubs would love to relish in it and take his time, but Etho was a busy man and had to get out the door. So Bdubs tied it back into a quick braid and leaned down to kiss the top of the man's head before he stood up.
"Persnickety man, giving me grief all the time over nothin'. Etho- if that even is your real name.."
Etho hadn't thought about that in awhile, actually. And he realized he had an opportunity to cause problems.
"Well." He said, "It isn't, but that's beside the point."
Bdubs' eyes widened, his mouth falling open.
Hook, line, sinker.
"It isn't?" He asked, "Well- well wait a second, then—"
"I gotta go to work." Etho added, very clearly messing with Bdubs. "You gonna be okay alone with the mouse?"
"You—" Bdubs looked terribly frustrated, and Etho giggled quietly. Bdubs fake-growled and said, "Ugh, you. Whatever. Get out of here, keep your stupid secrets. See if I care!"
Etho laughed himself to the door, grinning beneath his mask as he went to saddle up Lulu and head out.
Now, Bdubs expected a very quiet, solitary day. A boring one. He swept, he watered the garden before it got too hot, he brushed Climb down and cleaned his hooves.. yeah. Serious stuff.
The very last thing Bdubs ever expected was a knock on the door while he was staring at new ingredients and wondering what to make for dinner.
Bdubs paused. Was it Doc? It didn't sound like a Doc knock. Should he answer?
Bdubs was supposed to be in hiding, wasn't he?
But surely if someone was coming to kidnap him.. they wouldn't knock. What if it was a neighbor or something? Sure, maybe the only neighbors they had were a few miles away.. but what if someone was lost? Stuck out in the sweltering afternoon with nowhere to go?
Bdubs grabbed a kitchen knife to hold behind his back and approached the door with caution.
On the other side was a tall, broad man, his shoulders wide and muscled and tanned. Bdubs clenched the knife tightly. He didn't seem like he was looking for trouble, but..
"Whaddaya want?" Bdubs demanded.
Etho would be proud. Stranger danger and all.
"Hey," The man said awkwardly, hands in his pockets. "I'm looking for, uh, I'm looking for E..tho? If that's even his name. The scary guy, white hair.." And then he mimed a slice down the side of his face for good measure.
Bdubs' expression went flat.
"He's not scary," He bit out, immediately giving away any upper hand or secrecy because Bdubs just had to defend his friend, his partner. "He's stunning. Eye catching. Perfect, even-"
"Ohh-kay." The guy nodded, "Sorry. I didn't mean to- you know. That's my bad. Anyways, is he around?"
"Who wants to know?" Bdubs asked unhappily, propping his hip against the doorway.
"Well, I guess he'd know me as Beef, if anything." The man offered, reaching up a hand to rub against the back of his neck. "I just wanted to stop by and say hey, bring him a sorta 'long time no see' present."
And then Beef held up a small basket covered with a cloth. "I think I stepped on his toes a little the other day."
Bdubs looked him up and down, expression stern. Beef didn't look like trouble, and Etho had known him, apparently. Tried to talk to him, even?
If he'd posed any sort of danger to Bdubs specifically, the reaction would've been different. And Beef would've already been strung up in an alleyway or something.
"He should be home by sunset." Bdubs offered.
"Oh, I don't have to stay if—"
"Sure you do!" Bdubs widened the door and stepped back, unexpectedly excited now that he didn't think he was in danger. Moss, it would be good to flex some social skills again. "Come in, come in, make yourself at home-"
"I really—"
"It's so nice of you to try and make this up to him." Bdubs rolled over his objections neatly, "Do you want water or somethin'? It's blazin' hot out there."
And that was how he got himself an awkward lumberjack-looking fellow sitting at his table, barely fitting into the space as Bdubs introduced himself and grabbed two cups of water.
Beef looked around the meager household and then back to him, clearly unsure of what to do. Belatedly, he reached forward for the basket he'd set on the table and pulled away the cloth.
"Cookies. I figured you can't go wrong."
"You, sir, are on the right path." Bdubs nodded sagely. Did he know that Etho had a sweet tooth, or was it a lucky guess? "So when you said you stepped on his toes.."
"Oh, geez." Beef sighed, propping his elbow on the table and his head in his hand. "I really didn't expect to see him, you know? It's been.. what, maybe ten years? A little less? I don't know."
"That's a long time." Bdubs nodded along, eagerly putting the pieces together. Etho was around his age- younger, even! That meant that Beef knew the guy as a kid!
"Yeah. And a lot happened since then. I mean, he was just some guy in the woods we played with a few times, you know?"
"We?" Bdubs asked, leaning in slightly.
This.. okay, maybe this wasn't the most ethical thing in the world, using Beef as a way to snoop on Etho. Actually, this was maybe kind of bad. Etho did not want to talk about this yesterday. Shouldn't Bdubs be shutting his mouth and playing dumb?
"Pause and me." Beef answered morosely. With another sigh, he reached into the basket and pulled out a cookie before gesturing for Bdubs to indulge. And, well, of course he was going to.
It smelled like spices, soft and flavorful when he bit into it. Oh, Etho was going to love this.
"Right, right." Bdubs agreed, "You know, it's kinda hard for me to picture a baby Etho. I've always known him as this cool, tall, mysterious, hot— this cool guy."
Beef hummed through a bite of cookie. "So you two.."
"Well." Bdubs shrugged. Clearly, the answer was yes.
"How'd you meet?" Beef asked, leaning back in his chair. He seemed to be calming down, settling in.
"Oh. Uh.." Bdubs stalled abruptly. He'd never really come up with a cover story? He hadn't needed to before now. And the truth was not an option. "He- he kinda saved me, and— my life and all, and I couldn't.. not love him, you know?"
Beef smiled, and Bdubs determined that he could like this guy. He seemed kind. Gentle, maybe, despite being rude to Etho.
They chatted for what may have been an hour, ate more cookies, and settled into each other's company with very little trouble. And oh, Bdubs was relishing in some human contact that wasn't Etho or Doc. He used to have an entire castle full of people to talk to, and admittedly it had gotten.. lonely.
They talked about what Beef did - owning and running his late uncle's ranch - and what the town was like. Bdubs talked about gardening, about the chickens he was considering, his horses, the stupid mouse— trying not to reveal too much about Etho whenever the man came up. That was one line he wouldn't cross.
"Get enough hens and they might handle your mouse problem, actually."
"You can't be serious."
"They're kinda freaky, dude! My girls eat most anything they can catch. Mice, snakes.."
"Oh moss," Bdubs breathed, leaning forward, "You're kidding me. Well, I'd love a—"
The door flew open.
Etho stood in the sunset light, a knife in hand, his eyes locked in on Beef.
He was furious, because being angry was the best option. Better than being hurt.
"Get- get out," Etho demanded sharply, stalking forward.
Bdubs' eyes went wide from where he sat at the table next to the bulkier man. "Etho, wait, listen—"
"How did you even- how'd you find me?" Etho demanded, striding up to Beef and making him shoot up from his seat and stumble backwards. "Go."
Beef's hands shot up in a surrendering gesture, clearly panicked.
"Hey, listen- I just wanted to—"
"I don't care, I- I don't— just get out."
Etho was seething and stammering at the audacity, and at the fact that someone came and found Bdubs without him home. Beef was in deep, deep shit, letting himself in here.
"I'm here to say sorry!" Beef explained quickly, nervous, "I just wanted to-"
"Etho, stop," Bdubs shot up from his chair, reaching forward when Etho grabbed a handful of Beef's shirt, "He didn't do anything! I think you should—"
"How'd you track me?" Etho asked with a hint of panic, jerking Beef forward with his grip, then his head turned to Bdubs. "What did he say to you?"
"Listen, listen," Beef tried, "I can explain everything if you just—"
"Etho!" Bdubs insisted, reaching for Etho's arm on his good side, making sure he could see. "Nothing happened, he just wanted to talk to you, so I-"
"You- you let a stranger in here, I-" Etho wasn't about to be talked down right now. The man was clearly not his friend and yet he was sitting at his table with Bdubs, eating— eating.
"Did you— did someone send you?"
"You are completely insane," Beef realized, voice steadily pitching upwards, "Nobody sent me! I brought cookies because I felt bad and now you're gonna kill me?"
"He is not, not right now," Bdubs' huffed, "Etho, stop it. He can leave, he can go, but you're not gonna beat a guy up in our kitchen!"
"Outside." Was Etho's immediate response, and Beef's face went pale.
"No," Bdubs snapped, tugging on Etho's arm, "Stop that."
"He knows where we are," Etho reasoned, widening his eyes at Bdubs to try and get him to understand.
"So does half the town!" Beef said quickly, a touch hysterical, "There's only one crazy-eyed, white-haired jerk living in a thirty mile radius, dude, of course people notice the road you take home—"
Oh.
Etho needed to rethink a lot of things. Could he dig pitfall traps in the yard without a horse breaking an ankle in one? That's probably the one crime Bdubs would never forgive him for.
"-No, no, and absolutely no, just get off'a him—" Bdubs used his other hand to grab Etho's other shoulder and gave him a hefty pull that meant business.
Etho very reluctantly unthreaded his fingers from where they'd clamped on Beef's shirt, letting himself be moved back and away as he stared daggers at the other man. Beef quickly stumbled backwards, eyes wide and thoroughly startled.
So that was nice, at least.
"I'm not letting you kill one of your only friends just 'cause he put his foot in his mouth," Bdubs continued, stepping in front of Etho to stare up at him intently.
"He's not my friend." Etho said near-immediately, his voice dropping.
"Not after that!" Beef snapped.
"Hey! Hang on just a second, you came over to talk to the guy!" Bdubs complained, twisting his head around to stare at Beef judgmentally.
Beef looked like someone had slapped him, incredulous. "—that was before he threatened to murder me!"
"You hurt his feelings." Bdubs said pointedly, and Etho's face twisted into something derisive, stepping away from the two.
"No, no, he didn't, he only-" Etho stalled as he tried to find the right words.
What was there to say? That Beef disappointed him more than anyone had in his entire life? That Etho was utterly gutted that one of his two childhood friends didn't recognize him, didn't care to?
"He's not who I thought he was." Etho decided, shrugging like it didn't bother him even if it was a splinter beneath his skin, throbbing.