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r/hockey · Posted by u/gingerale_2481 3 hours ago.

Thank You Scott Hunter

It’s been about a month since Scott Hunter’s (honestly shocking) coming out after his Stanley Cup win, and I think it is safe to say that things have definitely changed for the better.

For those of us who grew up in the hockey world, we are no strangers to the extremely homophonic attitudes that have plagued the sport. From the minor leagues right up to the NHL, slurs and homophobic jokes have gone hand and hand with the sport, impossible to have one without the other. I genuinely have not stepped foot into a single locker room throughout my entire career without hearing the word ‘gay’ thrown around as an insult, at the very least (often, players were using much worse terms…).

This has set the heartbreaking standard that being anything other than straight is bad.

This unfortunately pushes so many people out of the sport, and I frankly don’t blame them. Hearing these comments day in and day out, knowing that your teammates would hate you and think you were disgusting if they simply knew the real you, it's exhausting. Those of us who stayed have to keep ourselves locked up tight. We keep our heads down and try not to provoke. We constantly overthink every single thing we say and do, terrified that others have picked up on the tiniest behaviour that might give us away.

Some even try to deny themselves, to push our identities down, to try and convince ourselves that we can be straight if we just tried. We date women, very publicly, to try and squash any rumours that might be circulating about us, whether publicly or in our locker rooms. But that isn’t fair to anyone; ourselves and the women we date knowing that we could never truly be happy with them.

It is one of the most difficult and isolating things I have ever experienced.

And now as I write this, sitting at the kitchen island in my cottage as I watch my boyfriend (yes, BOYFRIEND) watch the sunset over the lake; I feel lucky, I feel at peace, and I feel hopeful, for the first time in my life.

My boyfriend and I have been seeing each other on and off for seven years now. It started out casual, a dirty secret. We would meet up a few times a year, whenever we were in the same city, for a quick hookup. No feelings were supposed to be involved, it was for convenience, we were simply letting ourselves indulge in the urges that our teammates and coaches would say were wrong. As you could probably guess, that didn’t go to plan. Somewhere along the way, we fell deeply and madly in love, but we couldn’t act on it. The world we were in, the system structures around us, were keeping us apart. We could not be together, we couldn’t ever try, no matter how badly we wanted to.

When we saw Scott pull his boyfriend onto the ice and kiss him in front of the entire world, something changed for me, for the both of us.

Scott broke the (metaphorical) chains that had been keeping all of us queer players locked up. He took that sacrifice to be the first to do it. And now, allowing ourselves to be happy, to be our true authentic selves, together, doesn’t seem so scary.

If I haven’t been obvious enough yet, I think it's important that I clarify: I am an NHL player, and like Scott Hunter, I am gay.

Please respect my privacy, I made this throw away account for a reason. Although things definitely seem to be changing for the better, I still do not feel ready or safe to disclose my identity and come out publicly. I simply wanted to make this post to let Scott, and any others in the league who may be going through something similar, know that they are not alone.

The league and overall hockey community still has a long way to go, but hopefully this is just the first step of many in making hockey a truly inclusive and welcoming sport.

The future looks bright.

Thank you, Scott Hunter.

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