Work Text:
Only Chan, Minho, and Changbin remained in the living room.
Felix was sleeping in Chan’s bed, he had a long day and Chan bought him some fancy whiskey that he so generously shared with the group. Jeongin and Seungmin might’ve been in Jeongin’s room or they might have escaped to Seungmin’s—Changbin was pretty sure they were in their honeymoon phase but they’re so private about it that it manifests in suddenly disappearing from hangouts. Hyunjin and Jisung were up to some bullshit somewhere in the house, as they frequently were these days. Last time they got drunk they almost kissed. Minho was kind of egging it on.
“Chan-ah,” Minho called out from where he was laying flat on the floor.
Chan lifted his head off the back of the couch. He hated being called Chan-ah, but he had developed a soft spot for Minho. Also, Minho wore him down. Changbin was pretty sure Minho got off on lowkey dominating their friend group, which was chill. He was also pretty sure that was how Minho showed his love, so all things considered it was kinda sweet.
“Huh?” Chan was flushed red, they were in a lull of silence after Minho was antagonizing him about his sex life. He was kinda a menace these days.
“Are you busy right now?”
“Right now?” Chan looked at Minho on the floor, then to Changbin sitting next to him, confusion all over his features. “No?”
“Can you get me some water?”
Chan tilted his head. “You—” He sighed, and swayed a little when he stood. “Yeah.”
Changbin also stood up, stretched his arms over his head and twisted to stretch his back, then walked down the hall to the bathroom.
When he pushed the door open, Hyunjin and Jisung were sitting crosslegged on the floor, facing each other. Jisung was giggling and Hyunjin’s face was fixed in his concentrated pout, holding a marker to the side of Jisung’s nose.
“Hiii Changbinnie-hyung!” Jisung sang, he got jolly and touchy when he was drunk. Hyunjin’s pout worsened and he put his hand on the other side of Jisung’s head to hold him still.
“…What are you guys doing?” Changbin asked.
Hyunjin placed a dot on the side of his nose. “I’m piercing Jisung’s nose.”
“Oh.” Changbin looked around the floor: hand sanitizer, a silver earring, a needle sitting on a tissue. “Um. Are you qualified to do that?”
“Not really,” Hyunjin picked up the little bottle of hand sanitizer and dumped it on the needle.
“Chaaaan!” Changbin yelled out the door. “Minhooo!”
Neither of them responded. Changbin scampered into the living room, he overshot it and his knees collided with the arm of the couch. “Hyunjin is piercing Jisung’s nose.”
Chan’s smiling face fell into confusion. “Huh?”
“Like, right now.” Changbin gestured wildly to the bathroom. “He has a needle.”
“Did you tell him to stop?” Minho’s relaxed demeanor vanished. Changbin smiled at him sheepishly.
“Oh my fucking—” Minho jumped to stand up. “Did you at least try to intervene?”
“He definitely didn’t.” Chan shot to his feet too.
“I’m here telling you!” Changbin yelled. “That’s my intervention!”
“Unbelievable,” Minho muttered as he paced back to the bathroom.
“Extremely believable,” Chan corrected. “Believable and predictable, actually.”
Changbin followed them as they paced down the hall to the bathroom.
“Hyunjin, what the fuck?” Minho sounded and looked more stressed than Changbin had ever heard him.
“‘M an artist, it’ll look good,” Hyunjin mumbled, as he looked at his pen mark at different angles.
Changbin lit up. “You are an artist, baby! An incredible one. You—”
“So not the time, Changbin,” Minho cut him off. “Sungie, tell him to stop.”
“Minho, my big baby,” Jisung sang and batted his eyelashes at him.
“You’re not piercing your nose,” Minho answered.
“No, it’ll look cute, I swear.”
“It will look cute, but Hyunjin cannot be the one to do it.”
“Piercings are expensive,” Hyunjin said. “I do all my own piercings, it’s fine.”
Jisung’s eyes went wide, his lips parting into a little o. “Really?”
“You didn’t even know that, Jisung?” Chan shrieked.
Jisung tilted his head. “Why would I know that?”
“He’s about to pierce your nose!”
“Oh,” Jisung giggled. “Yeah, I guess.”
“Jisung,” Minho pleaded. “Do not let Hyunjin pierce your nose.”
“What are you so worried about, baby?” Jisung patted the tile next to him. “Come hold my hand while he does it.”
Minho sat on the ground next to him, his eyes immediately bulging on the bottle sitting next to Hyunjin.
“Did you try to sterilize the needle with hand sanitizer?” Minho picked up the bottle. “This is vanilla bean scented hand sanitizer!” His voice went higher in pitch. “This does not sterilize a needle!”
“It’s all I had.” Hyunjin shrugged. He went to reach for the needle.
“Nope.” Minho scooted in front of Jisung to block him from Hyunjin, stretching his arms behind him awkwardly to wrap them around Jisung. “Not happening. Not a chance.”
Jisung burst into giggles and squirmed against Minho’s grasp. “Let me pierce my nose!”
“Definitely do not pierce your nose right now,” Chan said.
Hyunjin groaned, rolling his eyes dramatically. “We can just do it tomorrow, I guess.”
“No,” Minho snapped. “You’re not piercing his nose at all.”
“I also do not think you should pierce his nose,” Chan added. “Where did you guys even get a needle?”
“I keep a sewing kit in my tote bag,” Hyunjin said, like that was obvious.
Minho took one hand off of Jisung to point at Hyunjin. “Gayest sentence I’ve ever heard in my life.” He flipped around to Jisung and held his face in both hands. “You’re not letting him pierce your nose tonight.”
“But I want to, though.”
“Jisung.” Minho held unwavering eye contact. “You’re so drunk. If you want a nose piercing I’ll pay for you to get it done by a professional, not this gayboy with a sewing kit and hand sanitizer.”
Despite his previous irritation, Hyunjin burst into giggles. Jisung started laughing so hard he got even redder, which should’ve been impossible. Minho stayed dead serious.
“Fine,” Jisung sighed, after he had caught his breath. “But instead you’re gonna—” He leaned and whispered something in Minho’s ear.
“No,” Minho immediately replied. “Tomorrow.”
Jisung groaned. “Why won’t you let me do anything fun?”
Minho shook his head in disbelief. “You need to drink some water and go to bed, princess.”
Hyunjin snorted and mumbled princess under his breath.
“Okay, angel baby beautiful sweetheart,” Minho shot back.
Hyunjin framed his face with his hands.
“Changbin would let Hyunjin pierce his nose,” Jisung observed.
Minho side-eyed Changbin. “Changbin would let Hyunjin maul you and he would never step in once.”
“Okay, I did step in,” Changbin corrected. “By getting you.”
“Hyung, this feels a little controlling,” Hyunjin said to Minho. “Just saying.”
“You’re trying to pierce his nose with a dirty needle from your gay ass tote bag while he’s wasted,” Minho snapped. “I’m not controlling.”
“Why is the tote bag catching strays?” Jisung asked. “I like the tote bag.”
“I wasn’t insulting the tote bag, the tote bag is fine. I—”
“He’s projecting his self hatred onto my tote bag,” Hyunjin interrupted.
“Enough from you.” Minho pointed at Hyunjin. “We’re done with you.”
Hyunjin pouted. He looked up at Changbin’s expectantly. Changbin didn’t know what he was expecting him to do, so he nervously looked at Chan.
“Okay,” Chan said. “Why don’t we leave the bathroom? And put the needle away?”
“You guys are all dramatic and boring,” Hyunjin stood up off the floor and pointed at Changbin. “And you’re sleeping alone tonight.”
“What?” Changbin whined. “What did I do?”
“You let him be mean to me. And you told on me.”
“Okay…” Changbin buffered for a moment. “But they have a point, baby.”
“Cool,” Hyunjin said. “Sleep with them, then.”
Jisung oooed at the same time Minho grumbled who’s controlling now.
“Okay, let’s leave the bathroom now,” Chan repeated, more urgently. “Let’s do something else.”