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“Alright, Amanda.” Carter sighs, sitting down on the stool at the young patient's bedside. “While your mom is calling your dad, I’m going to put a splint on your arm. Is that okay?”
The six-year-old in front of him nods tearfully, her broken arm cradled carefully against her chest. However, she makes no move to let him get near the limb.
The nurse in the room with them, a temp that he hadn’t learned the name of quite yet, steps forward. “Have you broken anything before?”
Amanda shakes her head, sniffling. “N-no. No…”
The nurse smiles gently, sitting on the empty space beside her. She rolls up the pant leg of her scrub, showing off a large but faint scar. “I was a little older than you when I broke my leg. I was playing soccer when I ran into another kid.” She moves so Amanda is able to see the scar better, and the girl leans in curiously. “And oh, did I cry. I was scared and in pain. But do you know what happened next?”
Amanda shakes her head, moving her good arm up to be able to wipe at her face.
“I was taken to a place just like this. My doctor fixed me up and I was good as new. It was like I never broke anything at all.” The nurse soothed, letting her pant leg fall. She looks back at Carter, grabbing the splint from him. “Doctor Carter is going to put this around your arm. It’s going to make sure that your bone doesn’t move while-”
Bang!
The nurse spares another glance at Carter, the noise interrupting her thoughts. Sounds like that aren’t something out of the ordinary around here. Something could have been dropped. Or something could’ve been knocked over. “It’s going to make sure that your bone doesn’t move while we wait to take a picture of it.”
“...you’re going to take a picture?”
Carter nods, rolling up his coat sleeve to show the scar on his arm. “When I broke my arm, they took me to do something called an x-ray. They’re these big things that let us see what’s wrong with your arm and where we need to fix it.”
“Does it hurt?”
“Nope!” He rolls his sleeve back down, listening as there is more commotion in the distance. Probably a fight. Or some unruly patient. “They’re quick and painless.”
“Do I get to see the picture?”
“Totally.” Carter says, watching as the nurse gets up from her spot on the bed and moves over to the door. She moves the blinds over and peaks out the window. He grabs the splint again. “But we have to put this on while we wait, okay?”
Amanda nods, carefully holding her arm out towards Carter. The poor kid was shaking the entire time Carter strapped it on. And once it was secure, he backs off, holding his hands up. “See! All done!”
The girl sniffles, her chest stuttering as she tries to pull in a deep breath.
Carter turns and looks at the nurse, who is still standing by the door. He gets up from his stool to stand beside her. “You see what’s going on out there?”
She shakes her head, letting the blinds fall shut. “No. But it sounds like whatever just happened was close to the trauma rooms.”
“You were really good with her.” Carter says, smiling as the young woman brightens at the compliment. “I mean it.”
“Thank you. I’m the oldest of six, so I’ve had a lot of practice at calming kids down.” She laughs. “My youngest brother was scared of everything when he was a kid. I would sit up with him at night for hours whenever he had a nightmare.”
“Well, those late nights definitely came in handy. But I’ve, um, it’s been a really busy day- so forgive me for asking. But I think I don’t know your name.”
“Caroline.” The nurse responds quickly, looking up at him. “But everyone calls me Car-”
Bang!
Carter feels the blood splatter onto his face before he can fully register what has happened. Caroline collapses, blood bubbling and pouring from her neck.
Severed artery.
He falls to the ground beside her, hands fumbling to put pressure on the wound. “Caroline, stay with me. Stay awake alright?”
The young woman gasps, her breaths nothing more than wet gurgles. Her eyes were wide and filled with tears. Tears of shock, pain, or fear- he doesn’t know. It was probably all three.
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Caroline desperately heaves in another breath, eyes becoming fixated on Carter’s face above her.
He knows that look.
No.
“Caroline, stay awake. You hear me?” Carter says, looking around the room for anything that would be able to help them. But if he were to leave his spot at the woman’s side, he would have to take his pressure off the wound. He fumbles for a pulse, finding nothing. “No, Caroline-”
“Mommy…” A tearful voice cries from the bed behind him. He whips around so fast that he thought that his neck would surely break from the action.
Amanda.
Oh-
Oh, god.
Before he could think about what he was doing, Carter’s brain carried him forward. He snatches the girl from the bed, bringing her down onto the floor with him. “Don’t look. Don’t look, okay?”
“I want my mommy!” Amanda cries, clinging to Carter’s dress shirt. “I want to go home!”
Carter cringes at the volume of the words, the deathly silence of the ER making her words sound as if they were being blasted through a loud speaker. He shushes her, eyes not moving from the body in front of them. “Shh… I’ve got you. But we have to be quiet, okay? Real, real quiet. Like we’re playing hide and seek.”
Bang!
Carter flinches and holds Amanda close. The gunshots were definitely getting closer. He needs to think of something.
Bang!
Bang!
He needs to think of something now.
Bang!
Carter scrambles to lay on his stomach, hiding Amanda beside him. He tries his best to conceal her with his coat. “We gotta be quiet, okay?” He reiterates, voice nothing more than a whisper. “Super duper quiet.”
Amanda reaches forward, trying to grab his hand. Sensing the motion, he grabs it and holds her trembling hand tightly.
With his free hand, he dips the appendage into the ever-growing puddle of Caroline’s blood. Nearly at the point of gagging, he wipes it all over his coat.
The door to the room opens with a quiet creak, causing Carter to freeze in place. He squeezes Amanda’s hand and holds his breath.
A pair of dark brown boots walks into the room. The pair of blue jeans the person was wearing was splattered with blood.
Carter prays to whatever god is out there that the person doesn’t look too closely. And that Amanda can stay quiet.
The boots get closer, stepping over Caroline’s body. They stop just in front of his face, nearly causing him to flinch.
“Put the gun down!” An unfamiliar voice shouts, causing the boots to turn suddenly.
Security? Or the police?
Carter doesn’t know. Nor does he care.
The boots run from the room and he is just barely able to get a glimpse of the gunman. He was wearing a heavy looking trench coat, the fabric flapping as he ran.
More footsteps follow the gunman and shouting ensues.
Carter doesn’t yet dare to move from his spot. However, he allows himself to breathe, lungs burning from the lack of oxygen. He squeezes Amanda’s hand again, reassuring her that he was still there.
And his heart was lightened, just a bit, when she squeezed back.
“Oh, man… Carter?” Another voice says, familiar this time. Footsteps flood into the room and he can hear the way each breath catches at what must be a gruesome sight. “I need gurneys in here! We have two down!”
Carter blinks, breaths stuttering. He still couldn’t bring himself to move. He watches as Caroline’s body is loaded onto the gurney and taken away.
“No! I’ve got- I’ve got him.” Another voice says protectively. Benton. Hands grip one of his shoulders, moving to flip him over.
“Is it over?” Carter asks quietly, voice still stuck in a whisper.
Benton’s hands freeze. Just for a moment. “It’s over. He’s gone. Just take it easy, Carter.”
Carter nods, pushing himself to sit up. But hands keep him held in place.
“No, man. Don’t move.”
“I’m- I’m fine.”
“Carter-”
“It’s not my blood.”
“What?”
“It’s-” Carter clears his throat. He can feel the exhaustion and fear setting in as the adrenaline leaves his body. “It’s not my blood.”
“Jesus, Carter. I thought…” Benton’s hands let go, allowing Carter to sit up now. The little girl still clings to him, and he can see the shock on Benton’s face.
However, Carter pays the look no mind. He looks down at the girl. “Are you alright?”
Amanda looks up at him with large, watery brown eyes. She nods and the tears begin to spill over.
Carter stands from his spot on the floor, bringing her up with him. “You did so good. You were so brave, okay? So brave.” She hides her face in the crook of his neck and he can feel the tears soaking into the collar of his shirt. “Let’s go see if we can go find your mom.”
He walks towards the door, but Benton’s hand stops him. “Carter, the whole ER is a crime scene. No one can get in. No one can get out.”
Carter looks down at Amanda protectively. “Then she stays with me.”
Benton sighs, watching Carter with an emotion that he couldn’t place. “Carter…”
“Amanda is staying with me.” He says firmly, leaving no room for argument. “She has been through enough today. I’m not leaving her by herself on top of it.”
He walks out into the chaos that has taken over the ER. Papers were strewn everywhere. Things were tipped over. Bloody footprints marred the white tile.
Amanda’s grip tightens as he opens the door to the doctor’s lounge. He shushes her quietly, running a hand through her hair. “I’ve got you, okay? We’ll get you to your mom soon. I promise.” She says nothing, not moving from her nestled position against his neck.
Carter sits on the couch placed near the back wall, letting the mid-day sun streaming through the window wash over them. He hums to the girl in his arms, some random tune.
He probably looks a sight right now.
He can feel the pull of dried blood on his face- on his hands.
And every time he dares to blink or close his eyes, Caroline’s terrified face stares back at him.
