Work Text:
Buck doesn’t remember the drive over to Eddie’s house.
He remembers the restaurant lighting, too dim, too intimate for the bomb his parents dropped between the appetizer and the entrée. He remembers Maddie going still beside him, her hand tightening around his under the table. He remembers his mom’s voice, overly calm, explaining that after a lot of reflection she and their father had decided to separate. Divorce. The word felt clinical, clean, like they hadn’t just split the ground open beneath their children’s feet.
But the drive? The traffic lights? Parking? Gone.
What he does remember is standing on Eddie’s porch, the familiar wood grain beneath his boots, the place he called home just months ago, and in his heart many times before, and thinking that this, this right here, was the only place he wanted to be.
He doesn’t bother knocking politely. He uses the key he's had ever since the tsunami.
“Eddie?” he calls, already stepping inside. The warmth and homey feeling of the South Bedford street house quickly enveloping him. There's no place he loves more.
“In here!” Eddie shouts back.
The living room is warm and lived-in, lamps glowing softly against the walls. Eddie and Christopher are on the couch, controllers in hand, some racing game flashing across the TV. Chris is leaning forward, tongue poking out slightly in concentration. Eddie’s brows are furrowed like the stakes are life or death.
Buck stands there for a second, just taking it in.
Home. Family.
“Buck!” Chris beams when he notices him. “You’re just in time, I’m about to beat dad.”
“You wish.” Eddie mutters, but there’s a smile tugging at his mouth.
Buck forces one back. “Oh, I can’t miss that. Scoot over.”
Eddie shifts without hesitation, lifting his arm so Buck can slide onto the right side of the couch, next to Eddie. Their thighs press together immediately, warm and solid. Eddie hands him the spare controller like it’s automatic, like Buck’s always meant to be there.
Maybe he is.
“You okay?” Eddie asks quietly, low enough that Chris won’t hear.
Buck swallows. “Yeah. I just… needed to get out. I hope it's okay that I came here”
Eddie studies him for a half second longer than necessary, then nods, giving him a soft smile. “It's always okay you're here.”
No interrogation, no pushing, just...okay. The way things always are when he's with Eddie.
They play for a while, and Buck lets himself get lost in it. The sound effects, Chris’ triumphant cheers, Eddie’s competitive trash talk. It’s easy to fall into this rhythm, into the familiar banter and shoulder bumps and shared laughter.
For a few minutes, he forgets the look on his mom’s face when she said, "We think this is for the best". He forgets the way his dad couldn’t quite meet his eyes.
For now, he just appreciates where he is. With his two favorite people, in the place that's always felt the most like home.
Chris finally wins a round and throws both arms up. “Yes! I told you!”
Eddie groans dramatically. “Rematch.”
“Nope. I’m retiring on top.” Chris grins, then looks at Buck more closely. “You look sad.”
Buck’s smile falters. Chris always notices these things with Buck. It's one of the things he loves most about him.
Eddie nudges him lightly. “You wanna tell him, or you want me to distract him with ice cream?”
Buck huffs a weak laugh. “No, it’s okay.”
He sets the controller down, elbows on his knees. “My parents are in town.”
Chris wrinkles his nose. “The ones that don’t visit a lot?”
“Yeah, those ones.”
“What happened?”
Buck hesitates, but Christopher’s eyes are open and earnest. He deserves honesty, and Buck would never lie to that kid. Not a million years.
“They’re getting divorced.”
Chris blinks. “Oh.”
The TV hums in the background. Eddie goes very still beside him.
“Are you okay?” Chris asks.
Buck could lie here and say he is. He’s good at that, has been his whole life. But again, he'd never lie to Chris. Or to Eddie. He just... couldn't, with them.
So instead, he shrugs. “I don’t know. I thought… I don’t know what I thought.” He lets out a breath. “I guess I always figured they’d just stay the way they were, even if it wasn’t great.”
Eddie’s hand comes to rest on Buck's shoulder, giving him a sympathetic squeeze. The touch is familiar, grounding, in the way only Eddie knows how to be with him.
Chris nods solemnly. “Do people stop loving each other when they get a divorce?”
“Sometimes.” Eddie says gently.
Buck stares at the coffee table. “Or they just never really knew how to.”
"It's like with your mom." Eddie says to Chris. "Had she not... you know, we were going to get one. We loved each other as people, but not in the way we were supposed to. It happens."
Chris looks across Eddie to Buck again. “I’m sorry.”
Buck smiles at him properly this time. “Thanks, buddy.”
Chris fiddles with his controller, then blurts, “I miss when you lived here.”
The air changes, Buck’s breath catches, Eddie’s fingers tighten slightly against the couch cushion.
An admission long in the works, settling between them. Something all three of them had secretly been thinking for months.
“Yeah?” Buck asks, aiming for light but not quite hitting it.
“It was better.” Chris says simply. “We had movie nights more, and you made pancakes on Tuesdays, and Dad didn’t look at his phone as much.”
“Hey!” Eddie protests, but there’s no real heat in it.
Buck’s chest feels too full all at once. “I liked living here too.”
Chris nods like that settles it. “You could again. It doesn't feel right anymore without you here."
Eddie and Buck exchange a knowing look.
There’s something there. Something fragile and electric. Both knowing they feel the same way about Chris' words.
“Okay.” Eddie says softly. “Bedtime, kiddo.”
Chris groans but doesn’t argue much. He hugs Buck tight before heading down the hallway. “Love you, Buck.”
“Love you too, buddy.” Buck says automatically, hugging him back just as tightly.
The words linger after Chris disappears into his room.
Eddie stands and stretches. “I’ll go make sure he gets settled in.”
Buck nods, staring at the blank TV screen now reflecting his own uncertain expression.
He hadn’t expected tonight to unravel like this. He hadn’t expected his parents’ marriage, flawed and distant and complicated as it was, to still have this kind of impact on him.
He’d thought he was past needing anything from them. Apparently not.
Eddie comes back a few minutes later, softer somehow. He doesn’t sit immediately, he hovers.
“You want a beer?” he asks.
“Yeah.”
They move to the kitchen. It’s easy, the choreography of it, Eddie grabbing bottles from the fridge, Buck leaning against the counter, their shoulders brushing in the small space.
When they move back on the couch, the distance between them feels more noticeable without Christopher on the side wedging them closer together.
“So...” Eddie says carefully. “You wanna talk about dinner?”
Buck stares at the label on his bottle, lightly ripping the top of it off. “They were… weirdly calm about it. Like they were announcing they’d decided to repaint the house, not dismantle forty years of a marriage."
Eddie listens the way he always does. Steady, focused, present. Actually taking in Buck's words, and understanding them.
“My mom said they just ‘grew apart.’” Buck continues. “That they’ve both changed. That life’s too short to stay somewhere you’re not happy.” He laughs bitterly. “Which is ironic, considering how long they stayed miserable.”
Eddie tilts his head. “Maybe they were scared.”
“Of what?”
“Of being alone. Of starting over.” Eddie’s gaze softens. “Of admitting they chose wrong from the beginning.”
Buck’s throat tightens.
“Do you think they did?” he asks quietly. “Choose wrong?”
Eddie considers. “I think… sometimes people choose what they think they’re supposed to want, instead of what they actually want.”
That lands harder than it should.
Buck thinks about Abby, Ali, Taylor, Natalia, even Tommy. About every almost that never quite fit.
“I don’t want that.” he says suddenly.
“Want what?”
“To wake up twenty years from now and realize I settled. Or that I was too scared to go after the right person.” His pulse picks up, though he doesn’t know why. “Time’s too short for that.”
Eddie’s jaw tightens slightly as he whispers, “Yeah. It is.”
Buck turns to look at him fully. “Do you ever think about it? Settling down again?”
“All the time.”
“With… anyone?”
Eddie’s lips twitch faintly. “That’s the problem.”
Buck frowns. “What does that mean?”
Eddie takes a breath like he’s stepping up to a ledge. “It means I don’t want just anyone.”
The room suddenly feels smaller, the two of them inching closer to each other without even noticing.
“You remember the auction?” Eddie asks.
Buck blinks. “Of course I remember the auction. You looked like you wanted to be anywhere else.”
“I did.”
“Why?”
Eddie huffs a soft laugh. “Because I didn’t want to end up on a meaningless date with someone I didn’t care about.”
Buck’s chest tightens. “So you just… risked it?”
“No.” Eddie meets his eyes. “I had Maddie bid on me.”
Buck’s brain short-circuits. “What? Maddie was the phone bidder?”
“I asked her ahead of time, that's who I was texting. Told her to win me and I'd pay her back.”
“You...” Buck sits up straighter. “You rigged it?”
Eddie shrugs, unapologetic. “I didn’t want to go out with someone random, someone I didn't truly know or care about. ”
“Then who did you want to go out with?”
The silence stills between them, and Buck’s heart pounds like it could almost burst out of his chest. Feelings he knew were there getting closer to tumbling out of his mouth.
“With you.” Eddie says, with complete confidence.
The words hang between them. Words Buck had unknowingly longed to here for eight years, but never dared to let himself dream about, thinking it impossible.
Buck stares at him in shock. “Me?”
“I almost bid on you too.” Eddie admits, looking Buck directly in the eye now. "When you were on stage. You looked so fucking good up there and all I wanted to do was raise my paddle and tell everyone else to fuck off because 'he's mine'."
Buck’s breath leaves him in a rush, his mouth agape.
“But I didn’t,” Eddie continues. “because I didn’t know if you’d want that. And because I was… still figuring some things out.”
“What things?”
Eddie swallows. “That I’m gay.”
Buck’s world tilts. The last reasoning Buck had for not being in love with Eddie completely shattered. He was no longer able to deny it.
He searches Eddie’s face for uncertainty, for doubt, but he finds none. Eddie looks content, at peace with the words.
“You’re...” Buck can’t even finish.
“Yeah, gay” Eddie’s voice is steady. “That was another reason I didn't want to get bid on, I didn't want to be forced into going on a date with a woman again. Especially not when you were there.” He lets out a soft sigh before continuing. "I’ve known for a while, since we moved back from El Paso. I just wasn't ready to say it out loud to anyone yet. Besides Chris, that is."
“Why not?”
“Because once I did, I couldn’t pretend anymore.” His gaze softens. “And because the only person I’ve ever actually wanted… was you.”
Buck’s chest feels like it might split open. Everything he's ever wanted was right in front of him.
"You wanted-"
“You. I want you Buck.”
The simplicity of it steals Buck’s breath.
He thinks about every moment. The lingering touches, the jealousy he never wanted to name, the way his old loft had never quite felt as warm as Eddie’s house.
He thinks about Christopher saying that it was better, when they all lived together. As a family. The family Buck has always longed for, but never truly realized he had until now, right in front of his face.
"Chris knows?" he finally says after a while.
Eddie nods. "He's the only person I've told so far, but I wasn't going to hide it from him. He figured out pretty quickly about you too. Kept telling me to get my head of my ass and tell you already." he chuckles at the end.
“I...” Buck says hoarsely, “I'm in love with you. For a long time, now.”
Eddie’s eyes flicker with hope. “Yeah?”
“I just didn’t know what to call it.” He laughs shakily. “Guess I was still figuring some things out too. Even denied it to my sister when she asked.”
Relief blooms across Eddie’s face, cautious but bright. “And now?”
“Now I’m tired of wasting time.”
Buck reaches for him before he can overthink it, fingers curling into the fabric of Eddie’s shirt.
There’s a split second where everything hangs in the balance, then Eddie closes the distance.
The kiss is soft, careful, like they’re both afraid the other might disappear.
It’s not blazing or chaos... it’s warmth, it’s familiarity, it’s the feeling of coming home after a long shift and knowing the door will open.
It's everything Buck had been waiting for. For once, a first kiss that felt truly right. He couldn't believe he'd been missing out on this for years.
Buck exhales against Eddie’s mouth, relief and want tangling together. Eddie’s hand slides up to cup his jaw, thumb brushing gently along his cheekbone.
They part just enough to breathe.
“You sure?” Eddie murmurs against his lips.
Buck nods. “Yeah, I’m sure. Always.”
They kiss again, deeper this time. Years of almosts melting into something real.
Eventually they part again. Eddie leans his forehead against Buck’s, but not before placing a lingering kiss to Buck's birthmark.
"You're beautiful." Eddie says quietly.
Buck almost chokes out a sob. Nobody had ever called him that before. Even the kisses, they never felt loving, in the way they did with Eddie right now. It's never felt as right, until this moment.
“We should… probably move this to the bedroom.”
Buck huffs a laugh. “Yeah.”
In Eddie’s room, everything feels softer. More intimate. Buck’s been here a hundred times, but never like this.
They don’t rush, though.
They toe off shoes, changing into sleep shorts and tank tops, set glasses of water on the nightstand, move around each other with tentative, reverent touches.
When they finally lie down, it’s facing each other. They slide in to their respective sides of the bed, as if they were always meant to be there.
Because they were.
Eddie pulls Buck close, not wanting any more distance between them, one arm wrapped securely around his waist, the other coming up to comb through Buck's soft curls. Buck tucks his head into the crook of Eddie's neck, fitting there like he was designed for it.
“This okay?” Eddie asks.
Buck presses impossibly closer. “Yeah. Course.”
They kiss lazily, unhurried. No pressure, no expectations beyond the simple fact of being together.
Eddie’s fingers trace idle patterns along Buck’s back, Buck’s hand rests over Eddie’s heart, feeling its steady beat.
“I meant what I said.” Buck murmurs. “About not wasting time.”
“I know. I feel the same.”
“I don’t want to end up like them.” He swallows. “Staying because it’s comfortable... or leaving because we were too scared to try.”
Eddie tilts his head down. “We won’t.”
“How do you know?”
“Because we’re not scared of the hard stuff.” His lips brush Buck’s temple. “We’ve faced worse than feelings.”
Buck smiles faintly. “True.”
"This is it for me, Buck."
Buck lets out a soft, relived sigh. "You're it for me too, Eddie. Always have been."
They lie there in comfortable silence for a moment, just enjoying being together. After waiting all these years, they finally were getting to enjoy it.
“Chris meant it.” Eddie says softly. “About missing you here.”
Buck’s chest tightens again, but in a different way. “I miss him too. And you.”
“I miss you here too. It's not just him.”
Buck shifts so he can see Eddie’s face. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.” Eddie’s expression is open, vulnerable in a way Buck doesn’t see often. “This house felt right with you in it.”
A slow, warm realization spreads through Buck.
“You know,” he says carefully, “we could fix that.”
Eddie raises a brow, a soft smile creeping up his face. “Oh?”
“Chris suggested it.”
“Chris suggests a lot of things.”
“Yeah, but this one’s not bad.”
Eddie studies him. “You want to?”
“Why not?” Buck shrugs lightly. “We already practically live in each other’s spaces, might as well make it official. Like you said, this is it for us.”
A grin tugs at Eddie’s mouth. “So you’d move in here?”
Buck narrows his eyes playfully. “Who said I’d move? You guys could move to my place.”
Eddie tilts his head in thought. “Your new place is bigger. Much better than the loft."
“Chris would like the hot tub too.”
“True. But didn't you always say this place feels like home?”
"It does, but that's really just because you two are here."
They move to comfortable silence again, enjoying the domesticity with each other they've always longed for.
“Okay, logistical details...” Buck concedes. “We’d figure it out.”
Eddie hums thoughtfully. “I do like my kitchen.”
“Okay but as the person who'd be cooking most of the time for us, I prefer my kitchen.”
“That’s debatable.”
Buck gasps. “It is not, I love my new kitchen.”
Eddie laughs softly, the sound vibrating through Buck’s chest. “We’re really doing this, huh?”
“Yeah.” Buck says without hesitation. “We are. Waited long enough.”
Eddie sobers slightly. “You’re not just reacting to tonight? To your parents?”
Buck considers that. Possibly this is all just shock, hurt, trying to rush into something so he doesn't end up like his parents.
Then he looks at the man holding him, sees nothing but love in his eyes, and he knows that it's not. It's finally finding what he's been waiting for.
“No.” he says firmly, confidently. “That dinner just reminded me what I don’t want. You-” His voice softens. “You’re what I do want.”
Eddie kisses him again, slow and sure, his soft lips slotting against Buck's like they were made to be there.
“Good.” he murmurs against Buck’s mouth. “Because I’ve wanted this for a long time, even if I didn't always know it.”
Buck smiles into the next kiss.
They settle back down, limbs tangling more comfortably now. Eddie stays on his back, Buck half sprawled over him, head gone back to the crook of Eddie's neck, fingers absently tracing the line of Eddie’s collarbone while breathing in his intoxicating scent.
“Guess we should tell Maddie.” Buck says sleepily.
Eddie groans, as he runs his hand through Buck's curls again. “She’s never going to let me live down the auction thing.”
“She’s going to be insufferable.”
“It's worth it, though.”
Buck smirks. “You really almost bid on me?”
“Yeah. Had my hand on the paddle.”
Buck grins. “You should’ve.”
“I know. You have no idea how badly I wanted to.”
They lapse into a comfortable quiet. Outside the city hums faintly, inside, the house feels steady and warm.
Buck thinks about his parents again, but the ache has dulled. It’s still there, but it’s not consuming.
Their story doesn’t have to be his. He gets to choose differently. He gets to choose Eddie, and Chris.
Eddie’s hand slides up and down his back in slow, soothing strokes, tightening his hold on Buck.
“You okay?” Eddie whispers, already half-asleep.
Buck presses a kiss to his chest. “Yeah.”
And for the first time all night, he really means it.
"I love you." Buck whispers, finally meaning the words for once in his life.
"I love you, too." Eddie whispers back, placing a soft kiss on Buck's forehead. "Always."
They’ll figure out the details tomorrow, the logistics of everything, how to tell people they're together now, the teasing argument over whose closet gets sacrificed.
For now though, Buck lets himself sink into the solid warmth of Eddie’s arms, feeling protected and safe. as he drifts off to what would end up being the best sleep of his life.
Time is too short to waste, and he’s exactly where he wants to be, forever.