Chapter Text
As weird as it sounds, the staff lounge is the least used room in the ER.
It’s where people slack off and hide from work. Not for hospital staff. Not in the hospital. Not in the ER. Everyone’s too busy. If they moved the coffee machine outside, no one would ever set foot through this door.
That’s where Lohen finds Illuga after their nightshift is over. On the floor, petting a dog.
Illuga doesn’t look up when Lohen enters, but he knows it’s him anyway.
“This is not the OR*.”
(*OR: operating room)
“Why is there a dog?”
Illuga sighs when Lohen joins him on the floor uninvited, scratching the dog’s chin.
“Dog walker vs vehicle. The car drove onto the pavement. The owner pushed the dog away trying to save him.”
“Did the owner make it?”
“No. A passerby heard barking, found the man, and called an ambulance. DOA*.”
(*DOA: dead on arrival)
“The driver?”
“Hit and run. The police reviewed the CCTV. It was pretty dark but judging by how he drove, they think it’s drunk driving.”
“Arsehole.”
“Yeah.”
They sit there in silence for a moment, until Lohen speaks again.
“And?”
“Is there anything my old pops hasn’t told you?” Illuga snaps.
“Well, he hasn’t shown me your baby pictures yet.”
Illuga rolls his eyes before replying softly under his breath, “9 year-old girl drowned getting her little sister out of the pool.”
Lohen doesn’t ask whether the girl made it or not. He can tell by the atmosphere when he steps into the ER.
They’re always bantering. Illuga doesn’t know why Nikita calls Lohen down, but he grounds him somehow. The air doesn’t feel as heavy when Lohen is around. Illuga is very sure he didn’t hit his head, but maybe he should get himself a head CT.
The dog puts his head on Illuga’s lap, as if he knows Illuga needs the comfort.
Lohen scratches behind the dog’s ear. The dog leans into the touch and closes his eyes when Lohen finds a good spot.
“Where is he going?” Lohen asks about the dog.
“The owner doesn’t have any family. So animal control is coming.”
“When?”
“Whenever they feel like it.” Illuga says with a mocking tone.
The dog opens his eyes to look at both of them. Maybe he knows they’re talking about his fate, his tail thumping softly against the floor.
“Well.”
Illuga already doesn’t like the sound of that, “Well what?”
“I could take him.”
Illuga finally looks at him for the first time since Lohen waltzs into this room.
“You?”
“Yes.”
“You barely sleep through the night.”
“I barely sleep through the night now. A dog won’t make it any worse.”
“It absolutely will.”
Lohen pauses for a second, then continues, “I grew up with dogs, actually.”
Illuga is taken aback by the sudden confession. “You did?”
Lohen sighs and turns back to give the dog soft pets on the back, “Why are you so shocked? Can’t a guy like dogs?”
“I didn’t think your head had room for anything besides your own interests.”
“Rude. It is true I don’t like most people though.”
“You don’t like anybody.”
Lohen turns to look him in the eyes. Illuga isn’t sure why he can’t look away. He also can’t make out the emotions behind that gaze.
The dog lifts his head and whimpers when Lohen stops moving. Lohen finally looks away and resumes to petting.
Illuga watches them for a moment before saying quietly, “You’re serious about the dog.”
“He’s a good dog.” Lohen says as if it’s that simple.
The dog wags his tail again.
“You’re adopting a random ER trauma dog.”
“Yes.”
“You’re insane.”
“You just figured?”
A pause.
Then Lohen adds, almost as an afterthought, “You could come by and visit him.”
Illuga doesn’t like how soft Lohen’s voice sounds now, almost gentle. And Illuga is well aware the man is incapable of being gentle.
So he retorts the usual way. With bantering. “Visitation rights?”
“If you insist, we could negotiate shared custody.”
It’s that tone again. Illuga can’t make himself look away from Lohen’s eyes.
He’s not sure how long they spend staring at each other, until someone clears their throat. They both nearly jump out of their skin.
Kaeya leans on the open door, looking way too amused. The door Lohen swears he closed when he came in. Somehow neither Illuga nor he heard it open.
“If you two have time gazing into each other’s eyes, maybe you should just go home.”
Heat rises up to Illuga’s face. Lohen rolls his eyes and is already back to his usual self.
“Kaeya, how unpleasant to see you. Meet my new patient, Mr…”
Lohen gestures at the dog, looking at Illuga, clearly waiting for him to supply the name.
Which Illuga doesn’t know, so he spits out the first one that comes to mind, “Aedon.”
“Didn’t know we start taking mammals besides human.”
“Anyhow,” Kaeya says as he walks out, “Leave before Jean kicks all of our arses.”
Neither of them moves for a moment. Under Lohen’s gentle petting, the dog slowly drifts to sleep on the floor between them.
Illuga is about to get up when Lohen catches his wrist, stopping him.
It’s that softness in Lohen’s eyes again. The one Illuga now decides he dislikes, because he feels powerless under that gaze.
“You know this is how the ER is.”
Illuga doesn’t answer. Lohen’s fingers are still around his wrist.
“You have a big heart. You always have. That’s what makes you a good ER doctor.”
Illuga scoffs. He is now considering that maybe Lohen hits his head too. Maybe they should both get a head CT.
But Lohen continues, “All lives are equal, right? That’s your belief.”
“Where are you going with this?”
“Stop counting only the ones you’ve lost.”
He pauses.
“Count the ones you dragged back too.”
Then Lohen stands up, letting go of Illuga’s wrist. His hand falls limp by his side.
“I need to go back and finish my charting,” he says as he heads for the door, leaving so suddenly, “But…”
He hesitates and then turns to face Illuga again, who is still sitting on the floor, stunned by Lohen’s earlier statement.
“Maybe we could go get Aedon some stuff together after that. The sun’s up. We could grab some breakfast as well. ”
Illuga can’t see his own face, or else he would’ve realised it’s the same colour as Lohen’s ear when he walks out.