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The Captain did not follow his crew to the mess hall after their 8 hour shift on the bridge. This would not usually concern Spock, however he had not observed the Captain eat alongside the Doctor for 5 days and 14 hours, nor had he sat in the mess hall with himself, Uhura, Scotty, Sulu, or anyone else, for that matter, in that time. After day 1, there was a 42.5% chance that the Captain had eaten privately in his quarters. However, after observing how the Captain tried to mask moderate tiredness, mild dizziness, moderate stomach pain, and moderate irritability on day 6, the probability that The Captain was eating regular, sustaining meals had dropped to 3.8%. The data troubled Spock, greatly.
Was the Captain feeling malaise? Spock was confused as of why the Captain hadn’t been honest with him about the situation, unless he assumed Spock would assign him to bed-rest, and then take acting duty over command — if that was so, the illness had a 94.6% chance of being serious, and therefore, would require the Doctor’s immediate attention.
After a 1.28 hour mediation, Spock decided calmly confronting the Captain would result in a 67.5% success rate due to the established trust between them. “Captain?” He knocked on his quarter’s door once, then waited 10.11 seconds, before knocking two more times. “Captain?”
“Spock?” The Captain sounded dazed and confused from behind the door. “Come in.”
He was sat at his desk; chewing the end of his stylus and furrowing his brows at his PADD. Spock observed a half-drank coffee on his desk as well as six empty mugs on his bedside, and a dried splash of what seemed to be more coffee on the floor. This implied excessive coffee dependency, which Spock inferred to be related to the Captain’s lack of adequate sleep.
“Captain, may I request a brief moment of your time?” Still blocking the exit, Spock straightened up, and held his hands behind his back.
The Captain raised an eyebrow at his request; then turned his chair to face him. “Is there a problem, Mr Spock?”
“It appears so, Captain.” Spock replied, his face unmoved. “Captain, I have reason to believe that you are not eating, nor sleeping, sufficiently. May I remind you that this is not sustainable, physically and mentally, and you may deteriorate immensely, unless this is rectified early.”
The Captain audibly and visibly gulped. A mix of emotions flashed across and altered his facial features, too human for Spock to understand, before settling on a weak smile. “I’ve been really busy, Spock.” He ran his hands through his hair. “Maybe I’ve overworked myself a little, but there’s nothing for you to worry about. It won’t impact my performance as Commanding Officer of the Enterprise.“
“I am, as of always, confident in your abilities as Commanding Officer, Captain, however I calculated a 7.4% chance in which you would faint during our last shift, and I am concerned that your dizziness will only worsen if you continue to avoid the mess hall.”
The Captain’s face fell. The too-human emotions returned, clouding his eyes with what Spock assumed to most closely resemble fear and guilt, and he ran his hands through his hair again. “I’m not— avoiding the— mess hall—“ The Captain stumbled through his protest.
“My data would disagree.” Spock cut him off.
The Captain deflated in his chair: tired and defeated.
“Jim…” Spock’s tone softened for the first time during their conversation.
The Captain physically shuddered at the sound of his name.
“If there is something concerning you, I would like to know, Jim…” Spock continued, keeping his voice steady, but not unkind. “Not as your 1st Officer, but as a… ‘friend’…”
The Captain dropped his head. “Spock…” He paused to gulp; then let out a shuddered exhale. “You’re right, I— haven’t been eating… ‘adequately’ for the last couple weeks. I’m not starving myself!” He quickly added. “Just— avoiding the mess hall, and eating a little less?”
Spock listened, attentively, before asking his next question. “Are you aware of the reason why your appetite has changed over the past two weeks, Jim?” His tone softened on the Captain’s name.
Another audible gulp. “It’s stupid…” The Captain replied, still refusing to look Spock in the eyes, as he sighed and bit his bottom lip in the way humans did when they experienced emotions. “You wouldn’t understand… No offence.”
“I doubt that, what you are experiencing, is ‘stupid’, Jim. I would like to be made aware of what is causing you distress or trouble, so that I can most efficiently help and support you, however, if you wish to only discuss this with the Doctor, then I understand, and will respect your privacy.”
“No, no, this isn’t an issue Bones needs to know about, it’s not— medical or anything.” The Captain finally looked up at him as he brushed off his small speech. “It’s just— just—“ He ran a hand through his hair. “Do I look— fat in my uniform?”
Spock raised his eyebrows in confusion as he watched the Captain physically withdraw into himself. “You are exceptionally satisfactorily aesthetically and physically pleasing for a specimen of your species. I do not understand where this ‘fat’ comment could have arisen…?”
“I just keep looking in the mirror, and— wait a second, did you just say that you find me attractive?” The Captain cut himself off: wide-eyed and grinning ear-to-ear. “I’m exceptionally hot, am I?” He teased, sounding more like himself with each word.
Spock blushed a soft green. “It was a mere observation, Captain, from the fact that—“
“Hey — don’t switch back to ‘Captain’, Mr Spock!” He interrupted with a laugh. “If you’re going to drool all over my satisfactory looks, you better keep calling me by my name.” The Captain smirked knowingly, and wiggled his brows with a flirtatious nature.
“This is a matter that can be discussed at a future date, Jim, when you are feeling better.” Spock pressed through his humanly embarrassment. “Must I remind you the reason of my visit?”
“Yeah, yeah, I’ll get some more sleep, and go back to eating with the others.” The Captain rolled his eyes. “Just know I’m never letting you forget this.”
Spock’s chest felt ‘warm’ and ‘fuzzy’. He needed to meditate.