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Sebastian woke to a muggy room, downright damp by his assessment from underneath the covers. He hated the heat of summer, but still insisted on cocooning himself under his blankets at night.
With the heat still being bad even in his basement bedroom, Sebastian had only fallen asleep in the early hours of the morning when the air had finally cooled enough, and judging by the awful heat and humidity now, it was likely late afternoon.
The humidity meant one good thing, though: a storm.
Summer storms were unpredictable and usually very short, giving Sebastian little time to capitalize on it if he wanted to. In all of five minutes he put forth the barest of effort to make himself presentable, grabbed his umbrella, and headed up the stairs and out of the house.
It was still hot even with the rain, but the smell was pleasant. All his years of smoking impaired his sense of smell greatly, but rain was one scent that always cut through. Breathing it in felt like he was healing his lungs with every inhale, holding it in the same way he held the smoke that had caused so much damage to his body.
His eyes cast up to the sky, wondering vaguely how much time he'd have before the storm let up. It probably would have been prudent to check the weather before he left the house, but by the time he booted up his computer, the storm might have been gone. Best not to dawdle— he would simply assess it by eye.
The whole sky was blanketed in dark gray clouds, chunky and a little bit menacing. The sun was nowhere in sight, and the sheer mass of cloud cover made Sebastian certain that this storm would linger for a while yet. He smiled at the thought, beginning his descent down the mountain path and into town.
As he had expected, the town was empty. It was still early in the season, but usually a summer day meant everyone was out of the house except for Sebastian— on any other day, anyway. Rainy days meant Sebastian had full reign of the town, like the ghost of a sovereign of a long-dead kingdom strolling the empty, decaying halls of his castle. All signs of human life gone, left only with the beauty of nature and his precious solitude.
He was most eager to see the beach like this: raindrops pelting the ocean and making it churn, the sand becoming firm and dark, the distant lightning strikes miles away on the horizon line out at sea. The bleak, unending gray horizon greeting him and making him feel as if life truly had infinite possibilities for him despite how miserable his days could sometimes be. It was nothing short of beautiful, and it all belonged to Sebastian.
Or it would have belonged only to him on most rainy days. Unfortunately, and strangely, there was someone else on the beach when he arrived.
He recognized the green letterman jacket instantly, though Sebastian could scarcely remember the last time he spoke to the guy. They had zero things in common, and in high school too many people wearing those same letterman jackets had bullied and picked on him. Alex hadn't been one of them, but Sebastian was certain he was the type.
Maybe he could just walk past without incident. That was usually the extent of their interactions, after all. Alex would be sitting with his old, miserable dog that looked like it wanted nothing more than to be left alone, barely registered in Sebastian's periphery as he went into the saloon to meet up with his friends on Friday nights.
Now though, there was no dog to occupy him. Sebastian felt a little uneasy at the prospect of conversation, keeping his head forward and refusing to acknowledge him.
The storm was loud as rain battered the sand, the sea, and the dock, and clouds rumbled overhead, but Sebastian noted another sound the nearer he drew to Alex: a music box?
That didn't make sense. Sebastian stopped in his tracks, trying to comprehend it. He was slumped over in the wet sand in the middle of a thunderstorm, playing a music box?
Was he okay?
Sebastian hadn't realized he had turned to face Alex and had been staring him down until emerald green eyes met stormy gray. Alex was totally soaked by the rain, his chest and jacket leaned over the music box protectively to keep it dry as it played its gentle melody.
The whites beside the bright green of his eyes were distinctly red. The tears were masked by the rain, but Alex had very obviously been crying. About the music box?
Sebastian quirked an eyebrow inquisitively, finding himself approaching the other man before he had even realized he was moving again.
“Hey,” Sebastian croaked, surprised at the sound of his voice as he spoke for the first time that day. “You good?”
“I guess,” Alex shrugged, shoulders tense and guarded.
Hm. I probably wasn't supposed to see this, Sebastian realized, eyes casting over Alex as he took in his body language. His nostrils were flared and lips pressed into a thin line, almost angry if not for his reddened eyes and upturned eyebrows revealing how he truly felt: vulnerable.
Maybe Alex had come here to be alone, too.
Stepping closer, Sebastian leaned over so as to protect them both beneath his umbrella.
“You're soaked,” he noted plainly.
“Yeah, I know,” Alex agreed, his voice just a little softer.
Were it anyone else, they would have probably asked what Alex was doing out here, but Sebastian knew it was none of his business. He hated those kinds of questions being asked of himself, after all. Sometimes he needed to think, or to breathe fresh air— other times he just needed to get away from people and surround himself in the raw, humbling power of nature. Perhaps he and Alex had at least that in common, if nothing else.
“Today's the anniversary of my mom dying,” Alex explained, his usually cocky voice now soft and straining not to break beneath the weight of his words. “It's been fifteen years, today.”
Another thing Sebastian could relate to. His dad had passed away at the end of summer, twenty years ago. It was a huge part of why he hated the season, miserable heat and sunshine notwithstanding. Each year, he'd feel that same cold, dead feeling in his chest as the anniversary approached, only getting relief after it had passed and the weather began to cool down. He looked forward to the moonlight jellies all summer long, for their passing also meant his grief could float away with them for another year.
“Sorry. My dad died too,” was all Sebastian could manage to get out. Just uttering that admission had formed a lump in his throat that he was eager to swallow down.
Sitting down beside him, Sebastian dug a hole in the wet sand with the handle of the umbrella, securing it in place above them both.
“That's hers?” Sebastian asked, pointing to the music box.
“Yeah,” Alex confirmed, his shoulders relaxing and his voice growing more steady now. “I play it all the time when I'm thinking of her. It always makes me feel better. She'd play it for me when I was little.”
“I'd play it more often, but it makes my grandparents sad,” he confessed softly. “They miss her too. So I come here, try not to trouble them with it.”
Sebastian could relate to that, too. He didn't have a music box, but some of his dad's old clothes hung in his closet. If ever he wore his shirts or his leather jacket, Robin would get this knowing, sad look. Although she was more than happy with her second husband, the love of her first truly never went away.
“I don't know why I'm telling you all this,” Alex laughed nervously, wiping away a tear that couldn't be blamed on the rain this time.
“S’fine,” Sebastian dismissed, the ghost of a smile gracing his tired lips.
“You're a really good listener,” Alex observed, a smile of his own spreading across his sad face. “Thanks for hearing me out.”
The two stared out at the roaring ocean, darker with the heavy shadows of storm clouds hanging above them— yet, it was peaceful, somehow. Sebastian felt comfortable in the silence between them, surprised at himself by how close he felt to Alex suddenly just for the fact that they shared grief.
Sebastian rarely ever talked about his dad, and although he had only said a few words about him, sharing that with Alex felt huge. The weight of that burden being cleansed by the storm, even for a few fleeting minutes, made them both feel as though they were a little less alone— the storm that they sought solitude in serving instead to bring together two strangers who recognized one another’s heartbeat.
The music box came to a stop, Alex carefully taking it in hand to wind it up again. The thing looked old and weathered, clearly well-used and well-loved.
Sebastian thought on Alex's words, particularly the admission that he had to play the music box sparingly to spare his grandparents’ feelings. The words spilled from his lips without thinking, surprised at himself by how generous he wanted to be to someone he barely had spoken to in his life.
“I could record it for you, if you want,” Sebastian offered casually.
“Record what?” Alex asked warily.
“The music box,” Sebastian clarified. “So you can play it whenever, like on a CD player.”
Alex considered the proposition, eyes searching Sebastian's face for sincerity. Although he hated the scrutiny of being looked at, there was something comforting in being truly seen by Alex for the first time. His dark eyes avoided eye contact from this close, shadowed by long eyelashes and nestled in a cradle of dark purple eye sockets. His long nose dipped down, hair cascading down with it to obscure half his face.
To Alex, though, in his eyes all he saw was a soft, quiet guy in a person he otherwise found to be abrasive and a little bit scary. Someone who put up walls of another personality to guard his heart, much like Alex always did— both of them placing their fragile hearts on the wet sand and seeing how identical the organs looked, still beating steadily in spite of all they had endured, covered in healed scars as proof of their respective journeys.
“You'd do that for me?” Alex asked softly, confirming what he already had become sure of.
“It's not a big deal, yeah,” Sebastian dismissed, mustering up the courage to meet Alex's eyes and give strength to his words.
“Thank you,” Alex breathed, eyes wandering to the ocean once again.
Sebastian followed his gaze, taking in the awe of nature. Abruptly, the clouds parted and the rain ceased, the music box finishing its song again just as the sun crept back out in gentle, warm rays.
For once, Sebastian welcomed the warmth of the sun. The scent of the ocean and the rain were all around him, his lungs clear as he breathed in the thick, muggy air. It already felt hot just for the sun to creep out from behind the clouds, a warmth filling his chest that he was unused to.
Without his dad, summer always felt dull and lifeless— hot, yes, but with miserable stale air that felt stifling. Now, it felt as if he could feel the sun on his skin for the first time, and could breathe easily.
He felt the heat of Alex beside him too. Never in his life had he been so content to have another living soul’s presence beside him.
More than that, he was touching him— Sebastian hadn't been sure when exactly it happened, but Alex's head was resting on his shoulder. Much as Sebastian hated to be touched, he allowed it. If their hearts could beat in synchronicity, surely it only made sense for their shoulders to meet— like a pair of conjoined twins, the only person who could truly understand the other.
The ocean was quieter now that the storm had passed, only the gentle roars of waves coming in and the soft splashes of water against the dock. The scent of rain and the ocean was strong, enveloping the both of them in a gentle caress— although Sebastian could swear there was some other scent beneath it that he couldn't quite place. Alex, maybe?
His nose made a patch of heat as he breathed into Sebastian's sleeve, and he wondered vaguely if Alex was breathing him in, too. He bit back a laugh at the thought, left smirking instead as he imagined Alex actually enjoying the smell of cigarettes that seeped into all of Sebastian's clothes.
Maybe that was another familiar comfort, too, though. His dad had smoked, and Sebastian first started because he missed the scent of that particular brand of cigarettes. Did Alex's mom smoke too? What else did they have in common?
Sebastian found himself with more questions than ever before, but he was content not knowing the answers. He was content just being in Alex's presence, alien as that sounded. His head tilted aside, pressing his cheek into damp hair as their heads rested on each other. Green and gray gazes fixed on the now-calm sea.
They sat in silence, but they didn't need to speak to understand each other.